Daily Mail - 14.08.2026.pdf

保守党是否在经历“凯米复兴”？支持率飙升使其被视为潜在首相

作者：Greg Heffer 政治记者

据一名顶尖民调专家称，凯米·巴登诺克（KEMI Badenoch）日益增长的人气正引发关于保守党迎来“凯米复兴”（Kemi-naissance）的讨论。

一项 YouGov 调查显示，现在有更多选民认为巴登诺克女士作为保守党党魁表现良好，且看起来像是一位候任首相。

在大胆承诺取消首套房印花税后，她在首相问答环节的表现有所提升，就基尔·斯塔默（Keir Starmer）的失败将其问责。在他陷入困境时，巴登诺克女士被认为展现了强大的领导力，在彼得·曼德尔森（Peter Mandelson）丑闻等问题上持续施压。

目前，近五分之二（38 per cent）的公众认为她作为反对党领袖工作出色，比去年10月上升了23 percentage points。

超过四分之一（27 per cent）的人认为她可能成为下一任首相——这一比例在2025 Tory conference期间仅为8 cent，现已增长了两倍多。

超过三分之一（35 cent）的选民对巴登诺克女士持有好感，比十个月前上升了14 percentage points。

YouGov 在公布调查结果时表示：“近几个月来，有迹象表明保守党的低谷期即将”

库珀对基尔的抨击

伊薇特·库珀（YVETTE Cooper）抨击了基尔·斯塔默的首相任期，承认工党在过去两年中“政府运作得并不太好”。

这位卫生大臣在对工党自2024. 大选 landslide（压倒性胜利）以来的表现给出严厉评价时，对前任首相执政期间的情况感到绝望。前内政大臣兼外交大臣库珀女士上个月被安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）调任至卫生部。

库珀女士表示，基尔爵士为政府设定的“使命” “某种程度上消失了”。她还抱怨前首相要求部长们“给我解决方案，而不是问题”。

结束，据称这得益于公众对凯米·巴登诺克在下议院表现的兴奋。有些人甚至将其称为“凯米复兴”。

“毫无疑问，自去年秋天以来，人们对凯米·巴登诺克的看法变得更加积极，这在我们所有的关键追踪指标中都得到了体现。在就任第一年停滞不前之后，人们认为巴登诺克作为保守党党魁表现良好且看起来像候任首相的信念，在去年10月至12月之间均显著增加，且自4月以来呈进一步上升趋势。”

但有迹象表明，保守党在选民中继续面临信任问题，因为只有25 cent的公众认为巴登诺克女士“值得信赖”——比去年10月仅上升了7个百分点——而37 cent的人认为她“不可信”。

YouGov 的报告补充道，这种她比政党本身更受欢迎的“凯米红利” “并非对称的，在改革英国党（Reform UK）的选民中尤为普遍”。

在2024年支持自由民主党的人中，约有24 cent现在对这位保守党党魁持有积极看法（上升了13 points），同时她在工党选民中的好感度也上升了9个百分点（至17 cent），在绿党选民中上升了7个百分点（至13 cent）。

移民计划引发愤怒 第12-13页

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妮可：为什么我在嫁给汤姆·克鲁斯时暂停了事业

前夫：汤姆·克鲁斯

作者：Alex Doyle 资深娱乐记者

人们普遍认为，最好的婚姻至少需要一定程度的牺牲。

而在妮可·基德曼（Nicole Kidman）的情况下，当她嫁给汤姆·克鲁斯时，受到影响的是她的演艺事业。

这位奥斯卡获奖女演员表示：“突然之间，我 22, 23 岁，我拥有了一个超级巨星丈夫。但这看起来完全自然。我们陷入了疯狂的爱河，就是这么简单。我记得有人对我说，‘好吧，这真的会影响你的事业’。[我当时]觉得，‘我不在乎。我恋爱了。我想结婚’。”

这位 59 岁的澳大利亚女演员于 1990 年圣诞前夕与克鲁斯结婚，她在为《英国版Vogue》拍摄一组照片时发表了上述评论，当时她穿着一件 Dolce and Gabbana 丝绸缎面衬衫裙。

在回顾她与这位现年 64 岁的《壮志凌云》演员的关系之初时，她说，当粉丝们开始称她为“克鲁斯的妻子”时，她的朋友们说“我们早就告诉过你”。

“[我当时]觉得，那又怎样？我不应该嫁给我爱的人吗？当然，我会抛弃我的事业，我不在乎，”她说。

这对夫妇于 1992 年领养了女儿 Isabella，1995 年领养了儿子 Connor，随后在 2001 年离婚。四年后，她遇到了音乐家基思·厄本（Keith Urban）。

他们在 2006 年结婚并育有两个青春期女儿，但于今年 1 月离婚。在谈到两人的分离时，她将这种感觉比作“自由落体”和“跳下”。

演技精湛的普鲁内拉留下£310 万

昨日披露，曾在《福尔蒂酒店》（Fawlty Towers）中饰演巴兹尔·福尔蒂那好斗的妻子西比尔而名声大噪的普鲁内拉·斯凯尔斯（PRUNELLA Scales），在遗嘱中留下了超过£310 万的遗产。

患有血管性痴呆的斯凯尔斯女士于去年10月在伦敦西南部万兹沃思公地（Wandsworth Common）附近的家中去世，享年93岁。遗嘱认证记录现已显示，她将大部分遗产以信托形式留给了家人。

这位演员因对戏剧的贡献于1992年被授予大英帝国司令勋章（CBE），她与同行演员蒂莫西·韦斯特（Timothy West）结婚61年，直到后者于2024年11月去世。

毒舌且长期忍耐的西比尔成为了电视史上伟大的喜剧角色之一，她在《福尔蒂酒店》的12集节目中对着由约翰·克里斯（John Cleese）饰演的倒霉丈夫大喊“巴兹尔”，该剧最初于1975年至1979年间播出。

作者：安德鲁·杨（Andrew Young）

但她同时也是一名受人尊敬的舞台剧演员，并曾出演过分量极重的电视角色，例如在艾伦·贝内特（Alan Bennett）关于苏联间谍安东尼·布朗特爵士的剧作《归属问题》（A Question Of Attribution）中饰演伊丽莎白二世女王，该剧于1991年播出。

她于1981年在国家剧院饰演该角色，随后在1991年的BBC电视改编版中再次出演，并获得了英国电影学院奖（Bafta）。

斯凯尔斯女士与丈夫在Channel 4从2014年到2019年播出的节目《伟大的运河之旅》（Great Canal Journeys）中赢得了新的电视观众群。但随着痴呆症的发作，她被迫退出。

在她去世后，家人透露她在去世前一天还在观看《福尔蒂酒店》。

她的遗嘱认证书显示，她留下的资产价值3,376,585 英镑，在扣除债务后，净遗产为3,166,554 英镑。她向各类艺术、园艺和环保慈善机构捐赠了数千英镑。

此外，她还给两名教女每人留下了2,000 英镑的遗产。其余遗产则以信托形式处理，其中演员儿子萨姆（Sam）和约瑟夫（Joseph）各分得40%的份额。剩下的20%留给了韦斯特前一段婚姻的继女朱丽叶（Juliet）。

结婚61年：斯凯尔斯女士与韦斯特

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Page 4.

火药桶英国

灰烬如雨般落下

失控：昨日，西米德兰兹斯图尔布里奇的野火蔓延至住宅街道，浓烟滚滚

居民们抓起能拿到的东西匆忙逃离。一名儿童和三名消防员被送往医院。

来自这座绿意盎然的市场小镇烟雾弥漫的天空之上的无人机画面显示，大火威胁要吞噬一片被严重烧焦的田野边缘的更多房产。

“灰烬已经在道路上像雨一样落下好几个小时了，”一名斯图尔布里奇居民告诉天空新闻（Sky News），并形容烟雾“非常、非常浓”。

西米德兰兹消防局首席消防官西蒙·图希尔（Simon Tuhill）表示，他的团队处理了“数千”起999报警电话。

当地议员安德鲁·特罗曼斯（Andrew Tromans）表示：“诺顿以及整个斯图尔布里奇出现的末日景象，遗憾地只是一个缩影

“火焰吞没了消防车”

如果我们不采取行动，这就是未来将要发生的事情的一小部分。”

大约 100 名消防员正在全力扑救正午时分在斯图尔布里奇（Stourbridge）高尔夫球场附近爆发的烈火，这场大火摧毁了 40 英亩的土地。据称，高尔夫球手们乘坐着球车逃离了现场。

一名目击者表示，他看到火势迅速蔓延，吞噬了树篱、电线甚至一辆消防车。迈克尔·摩根（Michael Morgan）说：“当消防队终于赶到时，所有的一切都被火焰吞没了，包括那辆消防车。火焰直接穿过灌木丛，将消防车覆盖在火海之中。它就这样把它吞没了。”

居民克里斯·丹宁顿（Chris Dunnington）表示，黑烟从附近的田野席卷到了房屋上。

他补充道：“然后我们看到火势蔓延到了第一栋房子的车道和围栏上。”

“风力变得非常强，这直接助长了火势。这简直是一场完美的灾难。”

在被疏散的人员之中的简·巴克斯特（Jane Baxter）说：“我们可以看到火焰高过房顶——火势就有那么高。”当一辆消防车

噩梦：强风导致火势蔓延，集镇房屋陷入火海

在水用尽后，居民们尝试自行击退附近林地中的火焰。与此同时，在不到 30 英里的地方，由于一场大火席卷了斯特拉特福-upon-Avon（Stratford-upon-Avon）的索尔福德普里奥斯（Salford Priors），当地宣布进入另一起重大事故状态。

沃里克郡消防救援局（Warwickshire Fire and Rescue Service）表示：“该地区有大量应急力量在部署，我们继续建议附近居民关闭所有门窗。”该局报告称，“在比德福德-upon-Avon（Bidford-on-Avon）和索尔福德普里奥斯周围发生了多起田野火灾”。

该局表示：“有人员因吸入烟雾正在接受治疗。目前的重点是防止生命风险。”农民们通过向现场运送装满水的储水车来支持消防局。

在该地区的其他地方，伯明翰（Birmingham）卡斯尔韦尔（Castle Vale）的房屋被火灾严重损坏，据报道一名女性受重伤。

现场照片显示，两栋平房被大火完全烧毁。其中一栋房屋的部分屋顶似乎已经坍塌。由于浓烟弥漫在车道上，伯明翰附近的 M6 高速公路北行方向在 5 号和 6 号出口之间暂时关闭。根据斯塔福德郡消防救援局（Staffordshire Fire & Rescue Service）的消息，斯托克-昂-特伦特（Stoke-on-Trent）的桑迪福德（Sandyford）也发生了火灾，少量房屋已被疏散；昨晚还收到报告称，伯明翰南部的梅波尔（Maypole）有房屋起火。

伍斯特郡（Worcestershire）也报告了多起火灾，包括珀肖尔（Pershore），据信那里有六栋房屋受到影响。一名目击者表示，大火像“多米诺骨牌效应”一样蔓延到了多达 6 栋房屋。

詹姆斯·利斯（James Lees）说：“我看到了很多烟，在消防局到达之前，在看起来像是某人的后花园的地方发生了火灾。”

“突然间，一栋房子冒出了一大团烟，大概在起火点向后数第四家左右。那是巨大的、翻滚的黑烟，然后它就那样……”

LITTLEJOHN

见第 17 页

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在空中盘旋了数小时

像多米诺骨牌一样在房屋之间蔓延。现在大概有五六栋房子完全被烟雾覆盖——你可以看到前面和后面都有火焰。”赫里福德和伍斯特消防救援局表示，200处房产断电，一人因吸入烟雾受伤。一名发言人补充道：“许多房屋受损，该地区的30处房产已被疏散。”在诺福克郡遭受一系列大火袭击后，该地宣布进入另一起重大事故状态。诺福克消防救援局的队员在昨天下午处理了16起紧急情况，包括一场发生在马斯霍尔德希思（Mousehold Heath）的火灾，导致当地道路关闭了一段时间。此前，周三南威尔士卡尔菲利（Caerphilly）的一场原野火灾蔓延，导致五栋房屋被毁。一名女性因涉嫌纵火被捕。

恐怖：斯图尔布里奇的房屋在巨大的草地火灾（左图）蔓延后被毁

这些大火在第五波热浪席卷全国之际爆发，英国经历了今年迄今为止最热的一天，也是有记录以来第五热的一天。

西伦敦 Kew Gardens 的气温最高达到了 38.1℃ (100.5°F)，初步超过了 6月 26日 诺福克郡 Lingwood 记录的 38℃。

英国气象局发布的罕见琥珀色极端高温预警一直持续到昨晚，覆盖了英格兰的中部和东南部。

此前，消防员工会本周警告称，英国面临消防员短缺，难以应对野火。

工会领导人史蒂夫·赖特（Steve Wright）表示，需要增加 5,000 名消防员，以防止生命受到威胁。

英国今年已经发生了 1,000 多起野火，使其成为有记录以来最糟糕的一年。

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火药桶英国

作者：莱蒂斯·布罗莫夫斯基（Lettice Bromovsky）

昨天，一列载有 150 名乘客的火车在极端高温中脱轨，导致两人重伤。

下午 3.54 左右，在东萨塞克斯郡，三节车厢脱轨，惊恐的乘客只能紧紧抓住翻倒的座椅和扶手。

目击者称，车厢似乎在空中跳了一下，然后倾覆在路堤上，滑动了一段距离后才停止。

事故发生后的戏剧性画面显示——此次事故还导致另外九人受轻伤——一段很长的轨道发生了弯曲。

乘客站在残骸顶部，从翻倒在刘易斯（Lewes）火车站附近的车厢中爬出。

可以看到一些人躺在担架上被送往医院。许多不需要医院治疗的人被送往当地的社区中心进行分诊。

这列从伦敦维多利亚站开往东本（Eastbourne）的 2.24 南铁（Southern）班次脱轨的原因尚未确认，但事故发生时英国正处于今年最热的一天，萨塞克斯部分地区气温超过 35℃。

早期的推测集中在钢轨在高温下膨胀并开始变形的可能性上，但调查人员尚未确定导致火车脱轨的具体原因。

交通专家克里斯蒂安·沃尔马（Christian Wolmar）告诉《每日邮报》：“嗯，发生这种情况有两种可能的原因。显然，火车到达之前轨道可能已经弯曲了。”

“但因为前几节车厢没有脱轨，可能是因为高温导致的干燥导致路堤坍塌，”

“一切都乱套了”

“然后是火车导致轨道弯曲，而不是相反。”

“我昨天在希思（heath）看日食时注意到——汉普斯特德希思（Hampstead Heath）出现了巨大的裂缝，像地震一样的大开口，很多地方肯定也发生了这种情况。”

“所以可能是类似的情况导致路堤部分坍塌，然后由于轨道失去支撑，在火车的重量下发生了弯曲。”

“考虑到前四节车厢没有掉下去，这可能是更合理的解释。”

前卢伊斯（Lewes）国会议员、前交通部长诺曼·贝克（Norman Baker）也表示，脱轨可能是由一段轨道在高温下发生形变（buckling）引起的。

他告诉时代广播电台（Times Radio）：“在允许任何火车重新运行之前，他们会希望确保铁路完全安全。如果确实是轨道形变导致的问题，那么修复所需的时间将大大增加。”

一名乘客描述了在听到一声“巨响”后，她突然被甩出座位的那一恐怖时刻。

来自美国华盛顿州的 56 岁乘客亚娜·路德维希（Yana Ludwig）说：“那简直太恐怖了。我当时正从伦敦返回，卢伊斯是我的停靠站。”

“传来一声巨响，然后一切都乱套了。剧烈地摇晃着——感觉过了很长时间，但实际上可能只有大约十秒钟。”

“我落在了一个人身上。我只是庆幸没有人丧生。感觉过了大概 20 分钟，应急服务部门才开始出现。”

“可能更快一些——时间感在那时有些扭曲。”

罗布·布拉德利（Rob Bradley）在事故发生时正带着他六岁的女儿梅贝尔（Mabel）从伦敦前往东本恩（Eastbourne）。他说他们当时在第四节车厢，而第五节车厢翻了。

他说，在脱轨前仅 30 秒，他的女儿还在第四节和第五节车厢之间跳舞。“当她坐下

车厢：卢伊斯附近堤岸上的后三节车厢，紧邻形变的轨道，环绕并插入图中

萨塞克斯惊悚火车事故是由热浪引起的吗？

混乱场景：一名乘客坐在侧翻车厢的座位上，而其他人则站在变形轨道旁的火车上（圈出部分）

布拉德利先生说：“然后我们感觉到火车在加速并开始摇晃。接着我们的车厢垂直向上跳了一下，我们意识到脱轨了。”

“火车的紧急制动启动，所有东西都被向前甩出。火车在停止前滑行了相当长的一段时间。”

“我们回头看，发现火车的整个后部都敞开了，烟雾和灰尘正涌入车厢，我们看到第五节车厢侧翻了。”

另一名乘客，来自东本恩（Eastbourne）的两个孩子的父亲利顿·米亚（Liton Miah）表示，他当时正与妻子和女儿们前往伦敦探亲，随后火车翻了。

米亚先生的侧腹严重淤青，他表示在事故发生前注意到了一条关于轨道问题的警告。“我在大屏幕上看到轨道有问题。我不明白他们为什么没有采取任何预防措施。我救了我的家人，并试图帮助另一对夫妇。”

“那个男人流血严重，我能帮他的不多。”

交通大臣海蒂·亚历山大（Heidi Alexander）表示，她对“萨塞克斯郡刘易斯（Lewes）一列南方铁路（Southern）列车脱轨的报道深感担忧”。她补充道：“感谢在现场支持受影响人员的应急服务部门。”

“我们正迅速与铁路行业及当地合作伙伴协作，以协助乘客。”

铁路事故调查局（Rail Accident Investigation Branch）正派遣专家以查明该南方铁路服务列车脱轨的原因。

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水费将大幅上涨……尽管已实施软管禁令

作者：Sam Merriman 政治记者

数百万民众被告知其水费将上涨——而此时全国正处于大规模软管禁令之中，且四分之三的国家地区正遭受干旱。

在水务监管机构宣布超过 3000 万 人的水费将再次上涨后，安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）降低生活成本的誓言在昨日化为碎片。

Ofwat 被指责为“无牙老虎”，因为它允许五家水务供应商将水费提高到此前商定的水平之上——尽管这些公司因管道泄漏损失了数十亿升水。

首相表示，他对水务公司将客户视为“空白支票”感到“愤怒”，但关于他将采取什么措施，他受到了质疑。

深陷丑闻的泰晤士水务（Thames Water）获准在 2027 年至 2030, 年间再次提高水费，获准的公司还包括南方水务（Southern Water）、South East Water、塞文特伦特水务（Severn Trent）和威塞克斯水务（Wessex Water）。其中三家公司在今年夏天对超过 2000 万 人实施了软管禁令。Ofwat 表示，它已初步批准供应商此次意外的水费上涨，以资助价值 £34 亿加元 的新项目，包括住房和数据中心的基础设施。

但该水务监管机构此前已允许供应商在 2025 年至 2030 年间将水费提高 36%，去年出现了令人瞠目的涨幅，且从 4 月起平均水费又上涨了 5.4%。

此次上涨将引发进一步的愤怒，而此时水务行业正因将污水排入英国的河流、湖泊和海洋，以及通过故障管道损失数十亿升水而遭受抨击。

管道泄漏和污水排放被归咎于对水务基础设施的持续投资不足——而行业内的权贵们却给自己发放了数百万英镑的奖金和分红。

保守党环境发言人维多利亚·阿特金斯（Victoria Atkins）昨晚呼吁首相为英国水务行业制定一项“可信的、有成本核算的计划”，而不是简单地提供“更多的同情”。

她还警告称，伯纳姆先生任何将该行业国有化的举措都将导致水费进一步上涨，她补充道：“工党应该清晰地阐明其计划，以便缴费者知道他们被要求支付的费用以及能获得什么样的回报。”伯纳姆先生——他曾誓言要

在英国经历有记录以来第五个最热日而酷热难耐之际，真正能去的地方只有一个——海滩。

在遮阳伞提供急需的阴凉时，度假者们在伯恩茅斯（Bournemouth）尽情享受海风的清凉以避暑。

气象局表示，伦敦西南部 Kew Gardens 记录到的初步温度为 38.1℃ (100.6F)，而萨里郡的查尔伍德（Charlwood）和伍斯特郡的佩肖尔（Pershore）达到了 37.8℃ (100F)。

昨天也是今年温度达到至少 35℃ (95F) 的第九天，达到 36℃ (96.8F) 的第四天，以及达到 37℃ (98.6F) 的第三天——这三项均为新纪录。在今年之前，英国记录到 37℃ 或更高温度的天数仅为

作者：Mark Duell

六天。在今年迄今为止最热的一天，一项罕见的“极端高温”警告从上午 9 点持续到午夜，共 15 小时，覆盖了英格兰的大片地区。

整个英格兰目前分别处于英国健康安全局（UK Health Security Agency）的黄色预警状态，直到今晚 9 点，并伴有“死亡人数增加”的警告。

巴士司机计划今天因必须在飙升的高温下工作而举行罢工。在八个 Arriva North London 车库工作的 1,500 多名司机将在今天和明天，以及本月、9 月和 10 月的其他日子采取工业行动。Unite 工会表示，车辆内部过热，无法在其中工作或旅行。奇尔滕铁路（Chiltern Railways）和东米德兰兹铁路（East Midlands Railway）昨日告知乘客“仅在必要时出行”。

c2℃、CrossCountry、大西部铁路（Great Western Railway）、北方铁路（Northern）、威尔士交通局（Transport for Wales）和西米德兰兹铁路（West Midlands Railway）也采取了缩减服务措施。

驾驶员收到警告，极端高温正使英国的道路承受压力。AA（英国汽车协会）表示，30多摄氏度的低位气温可能会导致沥青蓄热，从而导致道路软化。

英格兰近四分之三的地区以及整个威尔士正处于干旱之中，禁用水管禁令影响了2700 万名客户。汉普郡、怀特岛和西萨塞克斯郡已连续60天以上没有降雨。

领导一个“生活成本政府”——针对Ofwat（英国水务监管局）的决定提出了批评，并表示客户“不能被当作一张空白支票”。

“我理解人们为什么愤怒——我也一样，”首相说道。“事实是，多年来客户一直被要求支付更多费用，然而严重的污染事件却处于历史最高水平，且管道仍在渗漏。”

“客户不能被当作一张空白支票。如果水务公司试图将不必要的成本转嫁给家庭，他们将面临质疑。”大约13家水务公司申请提高账单以资助£43 亿加元的投资，Ofwat昨天宣布，已初步允许其中五家公司就£34 亿加元的新项目这样做。

由270 万人供应的Southern Water将在未来两年内看到账单上涨£80。Southern Water去年因渗漏损失了约370 亿加元升水，其账单最为昂贵，在今年上涨8 per cent后，客户每年平均支付£759。Thames Water——伯纳姆先生预计将其置于特别管理之下，以防止其在£200 亿加元的债务压力下崩溃——也被允许为其1600 万客户提高账单，服务于约800 万客户的Severn Trent同样被允许。

本周，在被披露向其新任首席财务官Steve Buck支付了£100 万签约费后，Thames Water引发了新的愤怒。

与此同时，由140 万人供应的Wessex Water将在未来两年内看到账单上涨£11，而由229 万人供应的South East Water将看到账单上涨£1。Ofwat将就拟议的涨价进行磋商直到September 24,，预计将在12月做出裁决。

一名发言人表示：“我们将跟踪绩效，以确保公司为客户和环境提供预期的改进。如果他们没有做到，支出将被追回。”

Southern Water和Wessex Water均表示将支持难以支付费用的客户。Severn Trent和South East Water表示将审查这些提案。

评论 – 第14页

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普京的新制服？简直一点也不 F.A.B.

像极了：剧中的维吉尔·特雷西

作者：伊莫金·加芬克尔（Imogen Garfinkel）

弗拉基米尔·普京昨日因访问一组争议岛屿而激怒了日本。

这位克里姆林宫的独裁者首次前往俄罗斯远东的库页岛群岛——这引发了东京方面的“强烈”抗议，日本同样对该领土主张主权。

此前，他监督了在附近的俄罗斯萨哈林岛进行的海军演习。然而，他在导弹巡洋舰“瓦良格号”上穿着的制服引起了关注，人们将其与 20 世纪 60 年代的电视木偶剧《雷鸟》（Thunderbirds）中的制服进行对比，该剧的无线电结束语是 F.A.B.。

但与该剧中的特雷西家族及其灾难救援队“国际救援队”相关的事宜不同，俄罗斯国家通讯社新俄社（RIA Novosti）表示，他当时正在举行关于“确保俄罗斯东部边境安全”的会议。

在库页岛群岛，克里姆林宫发布了一段总统在一家鱼类加工厂品尝鱼子酱的视频。

俄日关系一直受到围绕争议岛屿紧张局势的困扰，这些岛屿在日本被称为“北方领土”，并在 1945 年被苏联占领。日本外相茂手光光（Toshimitsu Motegi）在声明中表示：“北方领土无论从历史还是国际法来看，都是日本领土不可分割的一部分，日本政府对此访日表示强烈抗议。”

苏联在第二次世界大战的最后几天占领了位于北海道以北、具有战略地位的火山群岛，并从此在那里维持军事存在。2010, 时任总统德米特里·梅德韦杰夫成为首位访问该争议领土的俄罗斯领导人。

这四个岛屿——在 17,000 名日本人被驱逐后，现在居住着 20,000 名俄罗斯人——是丰富的渔场，并拥有包括金、银在内的矿产资源。

作者：丽贝卡·坎贝尔（Rebecca Camber） 犯罪与安全编辑

英国皇家检察署（CPS）负责人终于就未能将掠夺者西蒙·莱维（Simon Levy）投入监狱，导致其在保释期间自由地杀害两名女性并强奸第三名女性一事表示道歉。

斯蒂芬·帕金森（Stephen Parkinson）表示，在一名 40 岁男子尽管被指控多次实施性攻击，却仍被警方和法院多次保释后，他感到“深表遗憾”。

在一系列失误中，检察官未能告知法院，这名被定罪的性犯罪者正因谋杀卡门萨·瓦伦西亚-特鲁希略（Carmenza Valencia-Trujillo）而接受调查，且有猎捕女性的前科，导致他被释放出监禁状态并再次杀人。

“整个系统的失效”

尽管侦探已警告检察官莱维对公众构成危险且具有极高的再次犯罪风险，但检察官仍未能反对保释。

去年，在保释期间，莱维杀害了 53, 岁的瓦伦西亚-特鲁希略女士，几个月后又杀害了 39, 岁的谢丽尔·威尔金斯（Sheryl Wilkins）。他还几乎杀死了第三名女性，在一次残暴的强奸中将其窒息，并在伦敦地铁上实施了六次性攻击。

随着人们对警方和检察官如何漏掉身边的怪物而日益愤怒，昨日爆发了一场责任推诿战。苏格兰场局长马克·罗利爵士（Sir Mark Rowley）表示：“法院服务部门没有人，英国皇家检察署（CPS）没有人，缓刑监督部门也没有人站出来谈论他们的失败。”

马克爵士在 BBC 的《今日》（Today）节目中表示：“我们真正担心和关注目前情况的原因是，我们是那些——

英国皇家检察署（CPS）终于就让怪物莱维自由杀两人表示道歉

终身监禁：莱维

高级官员就监狱拥挤危机面临质疑

安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）麾下的最高级官员正因其在监狱拥挤危机中的角色而面临质询——该危机导致数千名罪犯被提前释放。

内阁秘书安东尼娅·罗密欧（Antonia Romeo）在司法部（MoJ）任职四年，期间扩建牢房的计划问题日益严重。

她被指控主导了一个“定时炸弹”，因为她的部门明知监狱

By Martin Beckford 政策编辑

空间正迅速耗尽——但新场地的建设却被推迟。去年在接受国会议员质询时，安东尼娅女爵承认在“交付方面存在一定程度的偏差”。

前监狱长约翰·波德莫尔（John Podmore）表示：“她挖了一个大坑，而安迪·伯纳姆直接跳了进去。在她任职司法部期间，她眼睁睁地看着一切走向崩溃。我没看到她采取过任何干预措施。拥挤危机已经存在很长时间了，但他们没有承担任何责任。”

一名政府发言人昨晚表示：“作为司法部的常任秘书，安东尼娅领导了新增监狱名额计划，其中包括开设三所新监狱，提供超过 4,500 个新监狱名额。”

那些日复一日面对受害者的……前几天我们遇到一个案例，一名本应被羁押的性犯罪者被保释到了距离其受害者仅两户之隔的地址。”

但公诉总长帕金森（Parkinson）先生反击称，司法系统的不同部门应该停止“互相攻击”。

他补充道：“我认为伦敦警察局（Metropolitan Police）局长完全正确地认识到，整个刑事司法系统都存在失败，我们对此负有部分责任，因此我想承认我们的失败并表示道歉。”莱维（Levy）目前因强奸和谋杀被判处终身监禁。

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母亲在土耳其接受冲动决定的臀部提升手术后死亡

作者：杰克·哈迪 (Jack Hardy)

昨日的一场死因研讯听证会获悉，一名在土耳其接受臀部美容手术后死亡的三孩母亲，在手术前五分钟被一项低价优惠所诱惑。

38岁的海莉·多威尔 (Hayley Dowell) 在伊斯坦布尔的一家诊所出现了医疗并发症，她原计划在该诊所接受抽脂和腹部整形手术。

验尸官批评了她在手术前不久被提供“追加销售”巴西臀部提升术 (BBL) 方案的方式。

据信，她是2023年因医疗程序出错而在土耳其死亡的六名英国人之一。该国因美容手术价格低廉而受欢迎，但一直受到英国卫生官员的警告。

验尸官尼古拉斯·沃克 (Nicholas Walker) 表示，这名实习牙科护士被给予五分钟时间来决定“要做什么以及如何支付”——他表示这种高压销售手段在英国是不允许的。

来自汉普郡东莱利 (Eastleigh, Hampshire) 的多威尔夫人决定在其他手术方案之外增加 BBL 手术，该套餐费用超过 7,000 英镑，因为她“对自己的身体非常在意”。

病理学家得出结论，她死于抽脂引起的脂肪栓塞。她的丈夫尼尔·多威尔 (Neil Dowell) 在温彻斯特验尸法院表示，他不认为她在手术前签署了接受 手术的同意书。

手术通过将脂肪从一个区域移除并转移到臀部，来增加一个人的臀部尺寸和形状。

听证会获悉，外科医生告诉多威尔夫人，他可以将抽脂过程中移除的脂肪用来增强她的臀部，并为 手术提供 1,000 英镑 的折扣。在给出结论时，验尸官表示，这次手术花费的时间比在英国进行要“少得多”。他补充说，外科医生萨利赫·巴萨特 (Dr Salih Basat) 博士并未告知多威尔夫人与 相关的风险。

他表示，在英国，美容程序的“追加销售”是被禁止的，外科医生需要获得患者的同意，并且在做出最终决定前需要有 14 天的冷静期。他补充道：“我的担忧是，一名英国公民可以在不知道手术风险的情况下出国手术，直到他们登上飞机。”

“追加销售结合价格降低，且时间有限，这无法实现真正的知情同意。这些限制了理性的思考、充分的反思、研究或咨询。”

“五分钟决定”

沃克先生表示，他将向卫生大臣和总医学委员会提交一份《预防未来死亡报告》。

死因研讯听证会获悉，多威尔夫妇于 2023 年 10 月 1 日抵达土耳其。她次日在私立 BHT 诊所接受手术，并于 10 月 3 日刚过午夜时分去世。

多威尔夫人此前已在英国接受过两次隆胸手术。她的丈夫说：“在生了三个孩子后，她想要一个平坦的肚子，而且她一直很在意体重。”

就在她准备接受手术的前几分钟，外科医生询问她是否希望将抽脂的一部分脂肪放入臀部，因为“那里有点扁”。

多威尔先生说，随后一名女性拿着刷卡机走过来要求付款。他说：“我们只有五分钟时间来决定这件事。”

接近午夜时分，他被告知妻子发生了两次心脏骤停。他被告知去道别，不久后她便去世了。

BHT 诊所拒绝在死因研讯听证会上提供证词。

给我站住！特朗普的ICE特工将配备电击手套

唐纳德·特朗普的移民打击行动现在将使执法人员配备能够释放强力电击的手套。

美国国土安全部表示，将花费2000万美元 (£1480 万) 购买数千件这种“干扰与降级设备”。

这种设备被称为“生成低输出电压发射器”（GLOVE），可通过380伏的电击使人失去行动能力。此举是在移民与海关执法局（ICE）特工使用激进手段逮捕嫌疑人而遭到强烈批评之后采取的。

官员和民权组织将该计划贴上“不必要且残酷”的标签。民主党人、纽约州总检察长莱蒂西亚·詹姆斯表示“我们感到愤怒”，并

作者：伊莎贝拉·马钦（Isabella Machin）

警告称，在其州内滥用该手套的ICE官员可能面临刑事后果。

这些手套此前已被一些美国警察部门和监狱使用。虽然其在市场推广中被描述为非致命且对心脏安全，但一项待决的

“不必要且残酷”

诉讼指控一名43岁的男子在2024年于肯塔基州里士蒙的一所监狱中，在被该手套电击27次以及被电击枪电击13次后死亡。麦迪逊县拘留中心的一项内部调查发现，其中两次手套电击持续了45秒和99秒——远超建议的15秒上限。调查发现：“这些行为不仅造成了不必要的痛苦，还增加了严重健康并发症的风险。”

另有两起诉讼指控该手套（见图）造成伤害：一名患有心脏问题的男子在拉斯维加斯的一个贸易展上被电击，以及一名在法庭上的被告称他在被电击后遭到嘲笑。这两起案件均被驳回。该设备制造商表示，该设备不应被用于“老年人、幼儿、孕妇和重度残疾人”。

用户手册还警告，该设备不应被用于应对口头反抗，或用于“惩罚、酷刑或打闹”。

前ICE局长约翰·桑德韦格表示：“这太容易被误用于那些不构成威胁的人群了。”但国土安全部表示，“每一个决定都是经过慎重考虑的”。

GLOVE制造商Compliant Technologies LLC拒绝置评。

你真是个美人……专家发现蛾类而欣喜若狂

每日邮报记者

对于一位专家来说，寻找一种稀有昆虫几乎贯穿了他的整个成年生活。

因此，在一个70年来未曾见其踪影的地点发现一群暗边美蛾（dark bordered beauty moths），成了他“职业生涯的高光时刻”。

来自蝴蝶保护协会（Butterfly Conservation）的戴夫·韦恩赖特博士（Dr Dave Wainwright）终于在诺森伯兰郡的国家信托瓦林顿庄园（Wallington Estate）追踪到了这种难以寻觅的生物。

几十年来，在英格兰境内，这种像卡仕达酱和巧克力色的日蛾只能在北约克郡的斯特伦索尔公地（Strensall Common）以及苏格兰的两个地点被发现。“我们只用了10分钟就找到了第一只，然后我们大家都开始捕捉它们，”他说。

瓦林顿庄园的护林员艾米莉·约翰逊（Emily Johnson）表示：“我们对此感到无比兴奋”。

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A-LEVEL成绩

学生们在算账

作者：埃莉诺·哈丁（Eleanor Harding）和安东尼奥·雅尔内·库贝罗（Antonio Jarne Cubero）

专家昨日表示，学生们正将就业前景置于“热爱学习”之上，目前 A-level 报考数学的人数创纪录地达到了八分之一。

随着数十万名学生领取成绩，数学报考人数增长了3.9%，这有助于推动高分成绩

学生将职业前景置于“热爱学习”之上，成绩创历史新高

至历史新高。结果显示，28.5% 的报考科目获得 A 或 A 等级，其中 9.6% 仅获得 A 等级。这意味着这两项数据已连续第三年上升。考试主管将这一增长归因于更多学生选择数学，而数学的得分传统上高于艺术和人文科学。与此同时，选择学习工程学（被认为是具有良好未来赚钱潜力的课程）的学生人数增长了 14%，达到 35,000 人。

数学的报考人数为 115,380 人，自 2014 年以来一直是最受欢迎的科目，而此前排名第一的英语文学则在稳步下降。

经济学现在成为学生选择的第五热门科目，高于 2025 年的第十位——增幅为 10.5%。

考试监管机构 Ofqual 的负责人伊恩·鲍克汉姆爵士（Sir Ian Bauckham）表示：“这些科目要么具有非常浓厚的职业色彩，要么已被证明与更高的赚钱潜力相关联，在学生的心中，这些科目将与我们在经济中看到的趋势联系在一起。”

“因此，我认为可以合理地推测，对于大多数学生来说，这些考量确实在他们的心中。”

根据招生机构 Ucas 的数据，被大学录取的人数也创下纪录，达到 446,690 人，高于去年的 439,180 人。其首席执行官乔·萨克斯顿博士（Dr Jo

Saxton）表示：“热爱学习曾经是[选择课程的]首要原因。”

“现在我们看到，将上大学视为对我未来职业生涯的一项投资，这绝对是排在首位的原因。”

埃克塞特大学社会流动性教授李·埃利奥特·梅杰（Lee Elliot Major）表示：“学生在选择科目时，越来越多地关注劳动力市场。这完全可以理解。”

“在生活成本上升、学生债务和人工智能的世界里，他们希望确信自己在时间和金钱上的投入将带来一份充实且稳定的职业。”

学生选择的变化发生在之前的保守党政府首次公开数据之后，这些数据显示了哪些学位科目能带来最好的就业率和薪资。

数学相关科目的回报最高，而英语科目的回报则处于最低之列。

前首相里希·苏纳克曾发起运动，主张在学校中更加重视数学。

这些成绩是除 2020-2022 年新冠疫情期间以外记录到的最高分，当时由于用教师评估取代传统考试，分数被大幅虚高。

庆祝：吉娜·斯坦切娃（Gina Stancheva）与

智库 Policy Exchange 的伊恩·曼斯菲尔德（Iain Mansfield）表示，在他看来，成绩的上升是成绩虚高回归的证据，这令人“失望”。他补充道：“成绩虚高似乎已重新确立为系统内在的一部分，就像在 1990 年代和 2000 年代那样——政府需要采取控制措施，否则人们对最高等级成绩的信心将被削弱。”

在私立学校中，48.6% 的

全新神圣 蜂蜜 (麦满分)

7月14日至8月24日供应。供应至上午 11 点。视供应情况而定。© 2026 麦当劳。

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以便获得工作

英国“最严校长”率领 70% 学生获得 A 和 A*

困扰：埃布瓦尔的格蕾丝·刘易斯（Grace Lewis）

震惊：伦敦学院的肖尔姆·罗伊（Sholme Roy）

自豪：电视名人乌尔里卡·琼森（Ulrika Jonsson）与儿子马尔科姆（Malcolm）及其成绩单

正在寻找课程？

不要错过《每日邮报》为您提供的英国每所大学的权威指南

她在埃塞克斯郡巴金（Barking）的 BTEC 艺术与设计实践科目成绩

百分比的成绩在 A 或以上，高于去年的 48.4。与此同时，国立学院（state-run academies）获得 A 及以上等级的成绩比例从 26.5% 下降至 23.5%，而综合学校（comprehensives）则从 22.6% 上升至 23%。

技术资格 T-levels 的成绩也已公布，其学生人数从 12,000 人增加到 20,000 人。

一直支持推广职业教育路径的首相安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）

在社交媒体上表示：“无论信封里写了什么，你们都应该为让自己走到这一步的努力而感到自豪。请记住，通往成功的道路不止一条。”

■ 爱德华王子与索菲之子、温塞克斯伯爵在收到 A-level 成绩后，将前往皇家农业大学就读。这位 18 岁的青年将于今年秋季在格洛斯特郡的赛伦塞斯特（Cirencester）学习农村土地与财产管理。官方并未透露他的考试成绩。

作者：科林·费尔南德斯（Colin Fernandez）

英国最严厉的校长正在庆祝她的学生取得了近 70% 的 A 和 A* 等级成绩——这一数字是全国平均水平的两倍多。

凯瑟琳·比尔巴尔辛（Katharine Birbalsingh）在伦敦西北部布伦特（Brent）经营着米凯拉社区学校（Michaela Community School）。

尽管该校服务于全国最贫困的社区之一，但其 A 和 A* 等级的成绩比例击败了仅 28.5% 的全国平均水平。

此前，新任教育大臣露西·鲍威尔（Lucy Powell）表示，强迫学校优先考虑学术学习是在“辜负”弱势学生。

保守党教育发言人劳拉·特罗特（Laura Trott）在 X 上写道：“期待露西·鲍威尔解释这些结果将如何对相关儿童产生不利影响。”

该校有三分之一的成绩被评为 A*——而全国平均水平为 9.6%。

比尔巴尔辛女士的学生中有 10% 获得了全 A*，其中两人获得了牛津剑桥大学的录取名额。

约 90% 的成绩在 A* 到 B 之间，学生在所有科目中的平均成绩为 AAA。

比尔巴尔辛女士表示：“我们对这些极佳的结果感到欣喜——11% 的学生将学习医学，85% 的学生将前往罗素大学集团（Russell Group）的大学就读。”

该校的成功被归功于其纪律水平，所有新学生都要参加行为“训练营”。

成功：凯瑟琳·比尔巴尔辛

这位出生于新西兰、毕业于牛津大学的校长于 2014 年创办了这所学校，旨在让弱势儿童享有与私立学校儿童相同的学术教育。

然而，上周鲍威尔女士声称，专注于传统学术科目的学校导致数百万儿童被“一次又一次地贴上失败者的标签”。

她表示，这就是近期数据显示有 100 万年轻人没有在接受正式学习、培训或工作的原因。尽管数学、英语和科学科目深受顶尖大学和雇主的青睐。

去年，在采取限制学院自由的举措后，比尔巴尔辛女士指责前教育大臣布里奇特·菲利普森（Bridget Phillipson）被“马克思主义意识形态蒙蔽”。

评论 – 第 14 页

男生在顶尖成绩方面胜过女生

男生获得 A-level 顶尖成绩的人数超过了女生——这主要由男生在数学、科学和技术领域的更高报考率所驱动。

今年，男生报考科目中获得 A 或 A 等级的比例约为 28.9%，而女生为 28%。此前，从 2012 年到 2019 年，男生在 A 等级上处于领先地位，随后在疫情期间女生反超——在 2021 年领先近 5 个百分点——直到 2023 年男生重新夺回领先地位。

白金汉大学教育与就业研究中心的艾伦·史密瑟斯（Alan Smithers）教授表示：“定量学科的增长似乎是男女相对成功程度发生变化的原因。男生更有可能选择这些科目，并且在这些科目中表现更好。”

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对中产阶级的战争

凯米：伯纳姆的移民计划证明他将背叛那些不支持工党的人

凯米·巴德诺克（KEMI Badenoch）指责安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）将非法移民安置在中产阶级区域，以惩罚那些没有投票给工党的居民。

这位保守党领袖声称，首相认为居住在“古朴村庄”的人们不支持他的政党，因此必须“忍受”数百名乘船跨越英吉利海峡而来的男性的到来。

她将这种“腐朽的原则”比作改革英国党（Reform UK）最近提出的建议，即在投票给绿党的地区设立拘留中心。

巴德诺克女士表示，尽管伯纳姆先生表现得“更加乐观”，但他与前任基尔·斯塔默（Sir Keir Starmer）爵士“一样糟糕”，领导着那个依然是“心怀恶意阶级斗争者”政党的老工党。

她的这些言论是在首相为一项极具争议的计划辩护之后发表的。该计划拟在牛津郡皮丁顿（Piddington）村（人口 400 人，位于自由民主党选区）附近的一个前军事基地原址上，为 1,250 名男性寻求庇护者建立营地。

“首相在抄袭改革党的政策”

他的政府还计划将类似数量的移民转移到北约克郡一个保守党把持的选区内废弃的林顿-昂-乌兹（Linton-on-Ouse）皇家空军基地。

伯纳姆先生宣布，英格兰中产阶级必须接收更多移民，因为“我们不能让国家里只有最贫困的社区承担所有难民和寻求庇护者的分散安置”。

据称，他决心改变目前的制度，目前许多寻求庇护者被安置在英格兰贫困城镇的多户共用住宅（HMO）中，尽管这样做为了实现公平将“花费更多资金”。

内政部大臣安娜·特利（Anna Turley）也表示，将寻求庇护者安置在住房“更便宜”的地区已经“引发了真正的社会动荡”。

但在给《每日邮报》的来信中，巴德诺克女士表示，该政策的真实原因是政治性的。

她说：“伯纳姆基本上是在抄袭改革英国党（Reform UK）的一项政策，唯一的区别在于目标对象。

今年 5 月，奈杰尔·法拉奇（Nigel Farage）建议在投票给绿党的地区设立移民拘留中心。而伯纳姆则选择将非法移民安置在不投票给工党的安静中产阶级村庄。”

现在，甚至有一名工党议员也公开反对在林顿-昂-乌兹建立移民营地的计划。

瑞秋·马斯凯尔（Rachael Maskell）表示，这将导致前空军基地旁这个 600 人的村庄出现男女比例为 6:1 的情况。她

评论

作者：凯米·巴德诺克 (Kemi Badenoch)

反对党领袖

下次当你听到工党告诉你，政府应对非法移民的措施正在“发挥作用”时，请想想皮丁顿 (Piddington)。

这个位于牛津郡的小村庄正在考虑采取脱离英国这一极端步骤，因为政府即将把 1,250 名成年男性寻求庇护者安置在附近的一个国防部场地中。

如果一个人口仅 400 人的绿意盎然的英国村庄想要成为一个独立国家，这听起来很荒谬，但相比之下，工党政府试图强迫同一个村庄在没有任何发言权的情况下，接受相当于其人口四倍的非法移民，这简直只有稍微不那么荒谬一点。

但皮丁顿仅仅是个开始。本周，我们的新任首相宣布，英国的小城镇和村庄应该开始准备迎接工党将数千名不受欢迎的访客安置在他们的家门口。安迪·伯纳姆 (Andy Burnham) 声称，不能仅由“最贫困的社区”被迫安置数千名非法移民，并补充道：“全国各地区都需要发挥作用。”

他可能不喜欢我指出这一点，但伯纳姆本质上是在抄袭改革英国党（Reform UK）的一项政策，唯一的区别在于目标对象。今年 5 月，奈杰尔·法拉奇 (Nigel Farage) 建议将移民拘留中心设在投票给绿党的地区，而免除那些选出改革英国党议员的地方。

伯纳姆则选择将非法移民安置在那些不投票给工党的安静的中产阶级村庄。同样的腐朽原则。

但话又说回来，我们不应感到惊讶。伯纳姆来到威斯敏斯特时表现得更加乐观且亲切，但他领导的依然是那个老掉牙的工党。

这个在学费上征收增值税（这意味着许多孩子在今年 9 月将无法进入他们心爱的学校）的政党，依然在内阁中保留着心怀怨恨的阶级斗士布里奇特·菲利普森 (Bridget Phillipson)。

同一个工党曾表示不会提高“劳动人民”的税收——随后却提高了雇主的国民保险费，使企业承受了巨大的压力。

她还指出，该基地紧邻一所小学和幼儿园，且每天只有四班前往约克的巴士（约克是她代表的城市）。

昨晚，一名工党消息人士反击巴德诺克女士，称：“对于一个失去了对非法移民控制，并将 56,000 名寻求庇护者安置在 400 家酒店、每天花费英国人民 £900 万 的政党来说，这种说法真是厚颜无耻。”

一名政府发言人补充道：“我们正在关闭每一家

寻求庇护者酒店，并将寻求庇护者转移到基础住宿设施中，包括前军事基地。

‘住宿设施中的寻求庇护者总数正在减少，过去一年中，住在酒店的寻求庇护者人数下降了 35%。在本届政府领导下，寻求庇护的成本已经降低了 10 亿英镑 billion。我们正致力于在全国范围内公平地安置寻求庇护者。’”

评论 – 第 14 页

绿意村庄不应承受这场危机的重创

许多企业不得不关闭或迁往海外，并随之带走了就业岗位。工党从未理解经营企业有多么困难。事实上，内阁中的大多数成员从未在公共部门或慈善部门以外的地方工作过。

来自伯纳姆（Burnham）领导的工党传递的信息很明确：皮丁顿（Piddington）的人民，或是约克郡林顿-昂-乌兹（Linton-on-Ouse）的人民，以及其他分布在皇家空军（RAF）基地附近的各种古朴村庄的人民，不是工党支持者，所以他们只能忍受。

我知道一个毫无防备的社区突然迎来数百名不请自来的非法移民是什么样子。作为一名埃塞克斯郡的国会议员，我对工党在埃平（Epping）重新启用贝尔酒店（Bell Hotel）作为寻求庇护者酒店感到特别恼火，而该酒店此前已被保守党关闭。在一名移民性侵一名当地女孩后，这种恼火变成了愤怒。

我与埃平的人们进行了交谈。我遇到了一些为孩子的安全感到恐惧的家长。任何人都不应该被强迫看着自己的当地区域一夜之间变成禁区，变成一个对年轻女性和儿童不安全的地方。然而，这正是伯纳姆在告诉这个国家大部分地区现在必须忍受的事情。

上一届保守党政府必须为英国非法移民的数量承担部分责任。我们尝试了所有能做的事情来阻止船只，但没有任何措施能通过法院的审核。我们在利用卢旺达计划威慑移民方面取得了一些成功，但在一次极其愚蠢的行为中，工党在大选后的第一天就取消了该计划。

只有一件事能解决这个问题——处理《欧洲人权公约》（ECHR）。这就是为什么我改变了保守党的政策，我们现在将退出《欧洲人权公约》，以便所有非法抵达英国的人都能被迅速驱逐。工党的政策是分散安置，而我们的政策是移除。

与其他那些只在口头上说说，却不愿为了确保计划能够实际执行而付出艰苦努力的政党不同，我们已经准备了一份200页的报告，解释我们将如何决定性地退出《欧洲人权公约》。

这是我的首要任务，而其他政党领袖则在无意义的补选上浪费时间，或者像伯纳姆那样，试图让 Netflix 变得更便宜。

只有保守党相信，社区不应该承受非法移民危机的后果。

当安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）想要惩罚那些没有投票给工党的城镇和村庄，而法拉奇（Farage）想要惩罚那些不愿投票给改革党（Reform）的人时，我想团结这个国家——并在保守党的领导下为每个人提供一个更光明的未来。

愤怒的皮丁顿反击

面对即将涌入的 1,250 名移民导致人数被反超，村民们对安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）计划在中产阶级地区安置更多移民的方案表示强烈不满。

牛津郡皮丁顿（Piddington）的居民对在附近一座前军事营地开设移民营地的提议感到愤怒，并投票决定举行一场象征性的脱离英国全民公投以示抗议。此次投票得到了教区委员会的支持，其主席蒂姆·麦克纳利（Tim McNally）表示，人们已经厌倦了被忽视。村民们称这些计划是不恰当、不切实际且没有必要的。

麦克纳利先生说：“这些男人在白天将被允许外出。我们靠近布林顿监狱（HMP Bullington），但那里是封闭的。而这个庇护站点则不是。”

---

作者：苏·里德（Sue Reid）

本周将 230 名非法移民运送到我们海岸的这艘巨型船只，现在像农民的干草捆一样被卷起来，存放在距离英国南海岸不远的一座政府仓库中。

由于该船在周一抵达时引发了公众愤怒，部长们已指示边境部队（Border Force）官员将这个由与儿童充气城堡相同 PVC 材料制成的巨大充气船隐藏起来。

由法国海上救援服务部门发布的巨型橡皮艇照片显示，船上的移民像沙丁鱼一样挤在一起，光着的脚悬在船舷外，充气船在人体货物的重量下向下凹陷。

这艘 15 米长的船只比双层巴士还要长，乘客数量足以填满一架客机，是八年英吉利海峡移民危机以来抵达我国的最大船只——这也是最新的迹象，表明人口贩卖团伙并未像工党承诺的那样被“摧毁”，而是依然占据上风。

在政府的隐秘存放地，这艘船的侧面现在将被刷上一个白色数字，表示它是自今年年初以来在肯特郡的多佛（Dover）或拉姆斯盖特（Ramsgate）港口被截获的第 29Wh 艘贩运船只。

边境部队的移民专家将对这个巨大的充气船进行测量和法医鉴定，以确定其来源。他们的侦查工作预计将发现，该船来自中国东部的一家工厂，是按订单定制的，价格为 2,000 英镑。

人口走私是一项全球性产业，自 2018 年开始记录小船移民以来，已有超过 200,000 名非法移民被运入英国。

五年前，《每日邮报》详细追踪了贩运团伙的运作，揭露了他们在运行被描述为“军事行动”的计划时所表现出的冷酷效率。

一名为国家犯罪局（NCA）及其欧洲同行工作的卧底警官告诉我们。英国公众认为移民是从法国海岸的大型超市买了一两艘船，然后从海滩出发。

“现实是我们正在与国际有组织犯罪作斗争。顶层的头目是精通多种语言、高度聪明且老练的各国籍人士。他们并不在乎移民；他们只想要每个人带来的钱。”

另一名驻荷兰的卧底警官补充道：“这个网络极其隐秘，以至于将移民推上船、甚至挥舞枪支催促他们前进的低级贩运者，根本不知道链条中下一个人的名字。他们全部使用化名，直到那些通过精明的。

揭秘：中国制造巨型橡皮艇的 6,000 英里奥德赛之旅

这种有组织犯罪在财务收益上已经超过了毒品走私。

英吉利海峡走私者的商业模式运行起来像一支获胜的军队一样高效。其规划极其细致。这是一种从汽车工厂复制而来的“准时制”（just in time）操作。

“一艘船被运到海滩上，然后在移民到达同一出发地点之前，由团伙使用电动泵将其充气。”

现在，《每日邮报》调查了这些船只的来源、制造商，以及它们如何通过跨越大陆、海洋、边境点和世界上某些最恶劣地形的 6,000 英里旅程到达海滩。

中国东部威海和青岛港口地区的工厂已成为充气船制造的热点，表面上

是为了在内陆水道和海滨进行休闲使用。

去年，总部位于威海的 Yamar Outdoors Product Company 因涉嫌向海峡走私团伙销售“移民”船只而受到英国政府的财务制裁。

然而，本周有报道称，该工厂的充气产品仍在网上销售，并可根据订单生产任何尺寸。我们的调查显示，这些船只通常通过跨境物流公司从这些工厂发出，这些公司在亚洲运行卡车。

船只被卷在塑料覆盖物中，在为期 21 天的公路和轮渡旅程中保持未充气状态。海运并非闻所未闻——但乘坐前往马六甲海峡并进入印度洋，然后向北穿过红海和苏伊士运河进入地中海的集装箱船，需要长达 40 天的时间。

每辆卡车穿过中国，然后穿过广袤的哈萨克斯坦，抵达里海，在那里司机乘坐滚装货运轮渡前往阿塞拜疆。从那里，它前往格鲁吉亚，在被称为 Sarp 的边境口岸进入土耳其黑海沿岸。

在穿过土耳其后（此处公路路线与海运路线汇合，在伊斯坦布尔停靠），运载橡皮艇的卡车到达保加利亚的 Kapitan Andreevo 边境检查站。

作为世界上最繁忙的检查站之一，这里不仅是进入保加利亚的门户，也是进入欧盟申根区的门户。难怪据报道，这里已被

像沙丁鱼一样拥挤：周一抵达英国的载有 230 名移民的巨型橡皮艇

有组织犯罪集团渗透，这些集团很可能接受走私者的贿赂，在不询问任何尴尬问题的情况下让非法货物通过。

随后它前往塞尔维亚，卡车在那里暂时离开欧盟，然后再次进入该集团。在不受边境检查干扰的情况下，它直接穿过克罗地亚、斯洛文尼亚和奥地利，然后翻越阿尔卑斯山，在萨尔茨堡附近的 Walserberg 村进入德国。

七小时后，卡车抵达北莱茵-威斯特法伦州，该地区被英国国家犯罪调查局（NCA）和泛欧警察组织欧洲刑警组织（Europol）命名为走私行动的关键枢纽。

在那里，团伙将船只藏在工业仓库、小型农场或住宅车库中，直到在天气适合横渡的日子被召集到海滩上。

当信号传来时，走私者在将尚未充气的船只放入小型送货车运往海峡海岸线之前对其进行检查。使用货车是为了避免引起法国和比利时警察的注意，因为他们会认为这些是当地车辆。

这些车通常由“违规”的外国快递员驾驶，他们有时本身也是非法居留者，是以现金雇佣且常驻德国或荷兰。一旦完成交付，他们会像抵达时一样迅速回家。

海滩上的偷渡组织者通常将船埋在沙子里，等待移民在可能一天后抵达。但现在的操作如此流畅，以至于当等待的移民从沙丘跑出来将其自行搬向大海时，船只通常立即被充气。

这些移民将经历长途跋涉，来自中东、撒哈拉以南非洲和南亚。但那艘船经历的旅程则更为漫长，它是英吉利海峡人口贩运贸易中的关键组成部分。

人口走私者的手段如此大胆，他们不断改变策略以欺骗英国和欧洲当局。就在上个月，边境部队在萨福克郡的费利克斯托港的一次突击行动中，查获了 25 艘充气艇和外挂发动机，全部由中国制造并运往汉堡。

在周一那艘巨型船只抵达后，工党新任边境安全主管安娜·特利（Anna Turley）表示，搭载数百人的巨型充气艇“绝不能成为常态”。

然而，事实是，这艘巨型橡皮艇极不可能是一次性向中国制造商订购的孤例。如今在德国的一栋附属建筑中，可能还存放着其他同样巨大的船只——而且更多此类船只正在运往这里的途中。

--。

每日邮报

评论

水务行业被贪婪所污染

在广泛实施软管禁令之际，水费再次上涨无疑是一颗格外难以下咽的苦药。

毫无疑问，水务公司的运作方式并非其应有的样子。

漏水率令人厌恶，而且在诸如新水库等其他基础设施方面的投资远远不足。水务公司的董事们在领取巨额薪水和奖金，而监管机构却坐视不管。

必须做出改变。 商业客户有权选择他们的水供应商，就像他们可以选择天然气和电力供应商一样。

那么，为什么住宅客户没有同样的灵活性，反而发现自己被铐在一家表现不佳的水务垄断企业身上？

要解决水费上涨这一无休止的痛苦，一个必然的解决方案应该是找到一种方法，将住宅市场也开放，通过竞争和创新来帮助降低价格。

一项绝对没有帮助的政策就是重新国有化——预计成本高达 £1400 亿加元 ——除非目标是让每个人都喝上棕色的饮用水。

安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）曾表达过一种模糊的愿望，希望将其应对生活成本计划的一部分，对公用事业公司进行大整顿。

首相不应看向运作尚可的天然气和电力市场，而应从我们那些贪婪且功能失调的水务公司开始，采取紧急且明智的行动。

伯纳姆的阶级战争

凯米·巴德诺克（KEMI Badenoch）在今天为《每日邮报》撰写的文章中指出，工党仍然是一个充满恶意且好斗的阶级战士政党，这一点是正确的。

政府报复性地对私立学校学费征收增值税，并用一系列新税收和繁文缛节束缚私营企业。

现在，伯纳姆先生想要将数千名非法移民强加给那些不太可能投票给其政党的城镇和村庄。

保守党领袖指出，这与改革英国党（Reform UK）所主张的策略相同，后者曾表示将把移民拘留中心设在投票给绿党的地区。

由恶意驱动的政策永远不是解决方案，尤其是当这个特定问题如此具有分歧性、成本高昂且难以处理时。

工党不应将英吉利海峡危机的后果作为一种惩罚手段，而应将注意力转向从源头上阻止移民抵达这里。

所有在昨天收到 A-level 成绩的勤奋年轻人都应当获得热烈的祝贺。

然而，新任教育大臣露西·鲍威尔（Lucy Powell）不应获得赞扬，因为她上周发表了荒谬的言论，称强调学术学习是在“辜负”弱势学生。

将她这种扭曲的世界观与米凯拉社区学校（Michaela Community School）公布的成绩进行对比：在该校“英国最严厉的校长”凯瑟琳·比尔巴尔辛（Katharine Birbalsingh）的领导下，尽管该校服务于全国最贫困的社区之一，仍有 70 per cent 的学生获得了 A 和 A* 等级。

良好的考试成绩可以成为通往成功且高效生活的跳板，尤其是对于那些出身贫寒的人来说。

总会有一些人更适合其他路径，这就是为什么在传统的学术追求之外，应当日益强调技术资格认证。

但像鲍威尔女士那样贬低知识，将毫无益处。

雷纳对零小时合同的改革是一场30 亿英镑 billion的冲击，这证明了在商业问题上，工党确实……

想象一下，如果阿根廷在今年夏天世界杯半决赛的第85分钟没有进球会怎样。

英格兰队当时以1-0领先，距离40年来首次进入世界杯决赛仅剩五分钟——而全国各地的酒吧老板们也即将迎来他们近代史上交易额最高的一天。

在7月19日的决赛日，酒吧经营者们本会争先恐后地在吧台安排额外的人手。每一张桌子都会被预订一空，啤酒花园也将挤满人群。

但随后阿根廷队进球了——而且进了两球。我无意提醒您那段心碎的经历。但作为Young's Pubs的前首席执行官，我认为这是一个完美的例子，说明了历届工党政府似乎无法——或不愿——理解的一件事：经营酒吧是一门不可预测的生意。

足球赛事中的一个进球就能让你一个月的营业额激增。突如其来的热浪（今年夏天我们见到了很多）同样可以，而一个阴雨连绵的银行假期则可能给利润带来沉重打击。换句话说，酒吧老板不可能预测在任何给定的日子里，吧台需要多少人手。

糟糕

然而，在安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）计划对零小时合同采取的打击行动下，这正是酒吧经营者将被要求去做的事情——在这样一个利润率已经极低的行业中，支付工资让员工闲站着。

政府目前正在就相关提案进行“磋商”，这些提案由重新获得任命的内阁大臣安格拉·雷纳（Angela Rayner）牵头，她是备受厌恶的《就业权利法案》的架构师，该提案可能会赋予所有签署零小时合同的工人新的权利。

目前，此类协议并不规定工人有权获得的最少工作小时数。但雷纳的改革将强制公司向员工提供每周保证的工作小时数，以反映他们目前的工作时长。

它还将要求公司向工人提供“合理的班次通知”，并为那些“在短时间内被取消、缩短或移动”的班次支付报酬。

我在今年年初于本报版面写道，上届工党政——

ZENY

GOOD

新闻

作者：帕特里克·达迪斯 (Patrick Dardis)

在基尔·斯塔默 (Keir Starmer) 的领导下，上届工党政府正对英国酒吧发动一场残酷且无休止的消耗战。

在斯塔默任内，工党将酒吧依赖的商业税减免从 75% 削减至 49%。雇主国民保险税从 13.8% 上调至 15%，而我们需要开始缴纳该税款的起征点则从 9,100 英镑 骤降至仅 5,000 英镑。

国家生活工资再次上涨 6.7%——其中 18 至 20 岁年轻人的最低工资上涨了 16% 以上，而这一群体构成了许多酒吧员工的主体。

对于一个已经遭受新冠疫情、剧烈通货膨胀以及五年内平均公用事业账单上涨 57% 打击的行业来说，这又是一次沉重的打击。不幸的是，这对许多酒吧来说是致命的：今年英国酒吧的消失速度几乎达到了每天两家。

任何认为安迪·伯纳姆 (Andy Burnham) 可能会结束工党对英国酒吧这场可耻战争的人，都将面临一个残酷的冲击——无论这位浅薄的新任首相为了讨好社交媒体追随者，被拍到在吃多少猪皮脆 (pork scratchings)。

他可能承诺从 4 月起将酒吧的商业税削减 20%——但与此同时，他正在酝酿一项会对我们行业产生更为阴险影响的计划。部长们表示，根据该计划，任何每周工作时间经常达到 20 小时的员工，应有权获得一份保证最低工作时数的合同。

该计划可能会进一步扩大。伯纳姆政府正在就该政策是否应适用于每周工作时间高达 40 小时的人员进行咨询，咨询将于下周结束。

周三，政府终于揭晓了这项鲁莽的提案可能会给企业带来多少成本。其自身的“官方影响评估”发现，这些改革“可能会使雇主更难以应对需求的变化”，并估计雇主的“直接成本”——包括保证工时、合理的排班通知以及取消排班的补偿——每年可能达到 29 亿英镑 十亿。

震惊

不出所料，该报告还发现，酒店业和零售业等部门将承受这些变革带来的最大冲击。

但付出代价的不仅仅是老板们。

当然，零小时合同有其弊端。没有人应该为那些利用此类合同让员工长期处于焦虑不安状态、并在最后一刻取消排班的肆无忌惮的雇主辩护。

然而，对于绝大多数人来说，这些合同提供了至关重要的灵活性。

周三晚上，我在格洛斯特郡布莱丁顿的 The King's Head Inn（在我看来，它是全国最棒的酒吧之一）里，我经常在吧台前驻足，与店主阿奇（Archie）聊天，询问生意情况。阿奇有两个大学年龄的儿子，他希望有一天其中一人能接手家族生意。当他们放假回家时，他会给他们安排在吧台工作——当然，所有记录都正规地登记在册——让他们能赚点额外的零花钱。这是一个让每个人都满意的安排。酒吧忙碌时，阿奇能得到额外的帮手，而他的儿子们在需要时能获得有偿工作，且无需在学期期间承诺固定工作时间。

青年失业率已处于十多年来的最高水平——而伯纳姆（Burnham）据称已将让更多年轻人就业或接受培训作为他担任首相后的首要任务之一。

作为在全国拥有 270 多家门店的 Young's Pubs 的首席执行官，我在过去几十年里雇佣了数千名年轻人。因此，我深知这些临时排班是多么宝贵。

在我们的剑桥大学毕业的首相看来，花几个小时收集用过的玻璃杯或接几杯啤酒可能听起来不像是有价值的工作。但对于一个青少年来说，这可能是他们对职场世界的初次体验。如果安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）真的致力于让年轻人就业，他最不该做的就是给企业增加更多的繁文缛节和文书工作——并给那些已经压力巨大的雇主提供另一个重新考虑是否雇佣他们的理由。

而且不仅仅是年轻人。阿奇每月还给住在附近的帕梅拉（Pamela）安排几次排班。她有一个年幼的孩子，无法承诺每周固定的轮班表。但当她有时间且阿奇需要帮助时，她可以接一个班——在物价上涨的时期，她很感激这带来的额外收入。同样，这有什么不好吗？

工党声称就这项政策进行了广泛咨询。我很难相信他们与像阿奇或帕梅拉这样的人进行过交流。

不，从提案来看，似乎像工党一贯的做法那样，工会主导了讨论，而几乎没有考虑到那些需要工资的人或那些创造就业机会的人。

安迪·伯纳姆在进入 No 10 时誓言要让我们的商业街成为英国“复兴”的新象征。相反，他正在确保这些商业街跳动的心脏——伟大的英国酒吧——将被永远地撕除。

■ 帕特里克·达迪斯（PATRICK Dardis）是 Young's Pubs 的前首席执行官

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Page 15

为什么“剽窃教授”会做出如此离谱的主张？

为什么要撒谎？我指的不是那些为了让事情顺利运行而说的社交小谎，而是那些据称规模巨大的谎言——虚构的学术职位、捏造的童年，以及从未发生过的耐力壮举。

而且，在决定撒谎之后，为什么选择如此夸张以至于令人难以置信，且如此具体以至于任何一个有空闲下午且能上网的人都能将其拆穿的故事？

这些是我被问到的关于杰森·阿尔代（Jason Arday）所面临指控的问题。上周，在剑桥大学宣布对其资历展开调查后，他辞去了社会学教育教授的职务。

他否认自己是骗子，并对他关于耐力跑和筹款的主张给出了解释；而当利物浦约翰·摩尔大学（Liverpool John Moores University）审查针对他 2015 年博士论文的剽窃指控时，这些指控并未成立。目前还没有任何证据证明他有罪，调查仍在进行中。

我应该说明，我从未见过杰森·阿尔代，因此不知道他的内心在想什么，也不知道他的生活故事中可能包含多少真相。但作为一名拥有 20 年经验、倾听过许多后来被证明并非真实之事的精神科医生，我可以泛泛地谈谈为什么人们会陷入类似的情况，因为这种模式是非常典型的。

有一个古老的描述性精神医学术语叫做“幻想性谎言”（pseudologia fantastica），这个词创造于 19 世纪 90 年代，用于描述那些谎言复杂、持续，且围绕着一个幻想中的自我版本构建，而非为了明显的物质利益而撒谎的人。

你可能会认为这并不适用于本案，因为这个故事显然为杰森·阿尔代带来了一个教授席位、几个荣誉博士学位，以及据他称的 140 万 图书合约。

但这种收益通常是这种行为模式的副产品，而非目的，你通常可以通过谎言的类型来判断这一点。

例如，一个想要获得特定工作的人通常会篡改自己的资历。但他们会就此止步，因为除此之外的任何行为都是纯粹的冒险，而关于他们跑过的马拉松、筹集过的资金以及所忍受的悲惨童年的天方夜谭，对于选拔委员会来说几乎没有帮助，反而会引发质疑，增加被揭穿的机会。

我见过的符合“幻想性谎言”描述的人往往不会停止撒谎。他们很少是冷酷或精于算计的。他们往往很有魅力，而且或许最重要的一点是，内心深处很脆弱。最令我惊讶的是，他们经常表现出对自己虚构的故事半信半疑的样子。谎言其实根本不是在对听众说，而是在对讲述者自己的自我（ego）说。听众的存在仅仅是为了证实它。

我认为，撒谎始于记忆，而记忆并不是对生活经历的简单记录，更多是对事件的重构。每当我们回忆或从记忆中检索某些东西时，我们都会重新构建它，并使其在返回时略有改变。所有

调查：杰森·阿尔代在圣玛丽大学（St Mary's University）接受荣誉博士学位

马克斯·彭伯顿博士（DR MAX PEMBERTON）从事精神科医生工作已有 20 年。在此，他探讨了杰森·阿尔代（Jason Arday）面临的问题，并表示有一种病症可以解释这一切

我们都会这样做，因为在潜意识中，我们倾向于转向那个我们想要成为的自我版本。

一个对自己感到自在的人从这个过程中几乎没有什么可获益的，因此修改幅度很小。而一个感到不自在的人会发现，每次重新讲述都会削减掉一点点那个他们无法忍受的自我；当一个故事被讲述了两百遍之后，它不仅被改变了，而且经过如此多次的演练，最终开始感觉像是一段真实的记忆。

这些故事也几乎从来不是简单的成功吹嘘，因为单纯声称自己聪明或富有的人会招致嫉妒——而嫉妒并不是这些人追求的。相反，这些故事关于被克服的苦难，

关于不可逾越的困境，关于没人相信的诊断，关于本不该幸存的童年，以及随后对这一切的胜利。对于任何幻想来说，这都是一个有效得多的结构，因为它让质疑这种幻想的行为显得像是一种残酷。

这也是我们整个抱负文化所构建的基础，它充斥在回忆录、Ted演讲以及电视才艺节目的背景故事中。这就是为什么任何利用借来的素材来构建身份的人都会采用这个模板。这是童话和传奇的素材：面对逆境的奋斗，这种奋斗证明了一个人的性格和内在品质中的积极方面。

我曾经见过一个男人（我已经更改了可能识别出他的关键细节），他向他结婚的女人声称自己是一名大律师。他每天早晨穿着西装出门，回家时带着关于法庭的故事。

令我震惊的是，他无法准确告诉我他是在什么时候决定撒谎的。在一次聚会上曾有过一段对话，有人听错了他的话，而他没有纠正对方。

很容易看出这是如何发生的。这是一系列缓慢、递增的谎言，不断累积。

每次他从周围的人那里获得积极的反馈，他就会进一步润色。每次反馈都提供了一种肯定，直到这个故事生长成了与起点完全无法认出的样子。

在此之后，他遇到了未来的妻子，不得不加倍强化这种欺骗。当我见到他时，他已经花费了近十年时间来维持一个虚构的生活，而这一切始于一次聚会上无伤大雅的误会。

这有神经学基础。伦敦大学学院（University College London）的研究人员让志愿者进入扫描仪，并让他们为了自身利益而撒谎。

他们发现，杏仁核（大脑中驱动对错误行为产生情感反应的区域）在第一次撒谎时强烈亮起，随后每次撒谎的亮度逐渐降低。

这种反应消退的幅度预示了下一次谎言的大小。我们的大脑开始消除那种尴尬、愧疚的感觉。防止我们生活在幻想中的护栏很容易被递增的谎言所移走。

为什么故事会变得如此夸张？部分原因是这种观念：听众会对这些故事产生习惯，就像谎言的讲述者一样。因此，去年能引起惊叹的内容，这次只能换来点头，而停止的掌声会留下一种空虚感。

因此，故事必须增长，并且朝着上次获得最响亮奖励的方向增长。故事一旦传出去就无法回头，你只能润色和详述。

为什么人们会编造如此容易被拆穿的故事？一个惯犯绝不会这样做，因为其目的是瞒天过海。而幻想者根本没有进行任何计算，因为他们的脑海中没有审计员或调节员。

他们在讲述故事时，脑海中想象的对方唯一形象就是某个看起来深受触动的人。一项主张是否会被衡量，不在于它能否经得起审查，而在于它是否能触发所需的印象和反应。而在这方面表现最好的主张，恰恰是那些任何理智的人都不会去编造的主张。

我认识的每一个幻想家，在任何人都已不再相信的时候，依然在继续编造他们的故事，因为另一种选择就是承认这是一个骗局，并任由人们摧毁他们为自己构建的虚假身份，从而变成一个无名之辈。

这就是为什么，如果杰森·阿尔代（Jason Arday）被发现撒谎，我不会感到胜利。当一个世界崩塌时，经历其中的感觉是非常可怕的。

这个世界是他构建的，他必须为此负责。但他并非独自构建，而那些将他视为门面人物并为其提供砖块的机构——尤其是剑桥大学以及多样性、平等和包容性（DEI）产业——现在却变得非常沉默。

在这场令人遗憾的闹剧中，他们承担着相当大的责任，应当为此感到羞愧并深刻反思。

---

“我只能说，如果你预算有限，你不会相信这个价格能有这样的味道。 ——Iceland 顾客”

“极棒的产品，超级美味，物有所值。 ——Iceland 顾客”

“在我看来，花一英镑能买到相当分量的鸡肉。

我们的顾客热爱我们的 £1 餐点……您也会一样

现在 750 款 或更低价格的产品

“物有所值，味道不错，快捷方便的一餐。 Iceland 顾客”

“极高的性价比，非常令人愉悦。 Iceland 顾客”

“极高的性价比。酱汁味道极佳，意面烹饪得恰到好处。每周定期购买。 顾客”

这就是为什么 我们选择

在线订购 以实现 当日送达”

产品在店内及在线上均有销售。产品包括：千层面 400g, £1, £2.50 / kg, 鸡肉咖喱配米饭 400g, £1 Toad in the Hole 300g, £1, £3.33 / kg, 牧羊人派 400g, £1, £2.50 / , 2 块裹面糊鱼片 200g, £1.25 / , 意式肉酱面 400g, £1, £2.50 / 。仅限部分产品。视供应情况而定。评论摘自过去 6 个月内在其网站上销售产品的独立客户评论。评论基于 1 到 5 星的评分。*在线订购需最低消费 £25 才能下单。店内和在线配送的最低消费均不包括购买 Bonus Club 优惠产品和购物袋。如果您的在线购物篮价值在 £25 至 £39.99 之间，将收取 £4 的小额购物篮费用。当您的在线购物篮价值为 £40 或更多时，将不收取小额购物篮费用。此费用将在您结账前在购物篮中详细列出。如果您选择当日送达，您的订单可能还需要支付配送费。这些费用在“预约配送”页面中有详细说明，并将在您结账前的购物篮中显示。产品和配送时段视供应情况而定。任何在线订单的配送地址必须在配送服务范围内。

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v1

利特尔约翰 (Littlejohn)

richard.littlejohn@dailymail.co.uk

随着野火在全英国各地继续肆虐，一场巨大的火灾摧毁了西米德兰兹的房屋，伊恩·博瑟姆（Ian Botham）则将那些对疯狂的“再野化”崇拜负责的罪魁祸首们击得体无完肤。

博瑟姆这位从板球传奇转变为热情的乡村活动家，将我们绿色宜居之地的毁灭归咎于生态狂热分子，而愚蠢的政治家和公务员则在其中推波助澜。

“肥佬”勋爵（Lord Beefy）在《每日电讯报》中写道：“让我愤怒，非常愤怒的是，生命本不必陷入危险。因为我们的野火危机是人为造成的。它是年复一年重复出现的可怕政策失误的结果。”

二十年来，我们在景观中增加了过多的植被，现在我们正在承受后果。

“另一个天才举措是停止对石楠花的预防性焚烧。冬季焚烧曾用于创建防火带。现在我们拥有大片连续的、老化的植被。”

结果就是一场接一场的灾难。2018年拉德尔沃思（Raddleworth）和2025年法林代尔斯（Fylingdales）的大火都始于冬季焚烧被禁止的土地。在拉德尔沃思，500万人吸入了有毒烟雾。据某些估计，有 28 人过早死亡。

他的言论强化了《每日邮报》罗伯特·哈德曼（Robert Hardman）另一篇精彩的周六随笔的结论。

大多数吞噬景观的火灾，如果传统受控焚烧没有被放弃，即便不能避免，也肯定能够被控制住。

一种“自然至上”的政策阻止了将枯枝落叶（即：易燃物）从田野中清除，并鼓励植被不受限制地生长，这只会给火焰增加燃料。

现在他们正在加强对红原 grouse moors（猎 grouse 的荒原）的攻击，而这些地方一直由猎场管理员精心管理，他们总是最先发现火灾爆发并将其扑灭的人。

其理由是商业狩猎破坏了荒原，并危及除被猎杀的红原 grouse 之外的其他野生动物。事实是，这在很大程度上是由政治动机驱动的，源于对富人杀死无辜鸟类的仇恨。

这种生态愚蠢行为并不局限于煽风点火。如今，如果英国的大部分地区没有陷入火海，那就是因为由同样一群负责再野化的、脑死亡的公务员和准政府机构官员（quangocrats）造成的洪水而处于水下。

环境、食品与乡村事务部（Defra）和环境署（Environment Agency）给人的印象是功能失调的官僚机构，其员工全部是穿着比肯斯托克（Birkens stock）凉鞋的城市绿色狂热分子，他们几乎或完全没有管理农田和水道的“生活经验”，并且总是将政治偏见和受保护物种置于人之上。

经常让数万人生活痛苦的圣经级洪水，是旨在以牺牲农民和房主为代价，为野生动物创造更多湿地的政策直接导致的结果。

这种疯狂行为已经持续多年，并且在本专栏中已有详尽记录。

例如，泰晤士河谷的大规模洪水是由环境署放弃河道清淤造成的，目的是为了保护一种名为“凹河贻贝”（Depressed River Mussel）的濒危软体动物——这是本专栏，尤其是加里（Gary）一直关注的老话题。至于对河边房主的冲击，他们根本不在乎。

在萨默塞特平原（Somerset Levels），他们采取了一项蓄意增加洪水的政策，通过停止清淤来促进水鼩（water voles）、大水欧防风（greater water parsnips）以及银色

生态狂热分子如何导致

BURNBABY

HERMAN

英国...

潜水甲虫和沼泽蚱蜢。类似的例子还有很多。

本可以用于建设正规防洪设施和可靠能源的资金，却被挥霍在诸如鸟类保护区和风电场之类的虚荣项目上。如果他们真的在乎

感谢大家分享关于被迫使用剑桥安装的那种蹲便器的恐怖故事——尽管这些内容不适合在家庭报纸上刊登。读者科林·温索尔（Colin Winsor）注意到了我的观察，即使用那种厕所需要二战兰开斯特轰炸机轰炸员的技巧。科林对此并不确定：“那些飞机不就是投掷跳弹的飞机吗？”

环境，他们就不会用那些丑陋的《世界大战》式风车破坏景观，不会修建一英里又一英里的庞大电线杆，也不会用中国制造的太阳能电池板覆盖宝贵的农田——这些电池板在没有阳光时完全没用。现实情况是

政府计划将数千名乘坐小船抵达的移民安置在前陆军基地的计划遭到了广泛抵制。这完全正确。在任何理智的社会中，这些营地应该依然由士兵填满。

对环境——以及更广泛的经济——最大的威胁来自于环保主义者本身。不仅是在农村地区，在我们的城镇景观中也是如此。

这种“再野化”的疯狂行为——其中包括将狼重新引入英国的计划——已经蔓延到了乡村之外。城市

在被内阁解雇后，前副首相大卫·拉米（David Lammy）现在暗示他可能会竞选伦敦市长。考虑到他在《Mastermind》节目中糟糕的表现，如果你问他谁接替肯·利文斯通（Ken Livingstone）担任市长，他可能会回答：迪克·惠廷顿（Dick Whittington）。

再野化现在成了绿色党和疯狂左翼议会的最新痴迷。

上周我向大家报道了伯恩茅斯海滨景观被遮挡的新闻，因为再野化狂热者放弃了割草机，改用山羊，但山羊无法触及爬满海滨大道上的叶子。在布赖顿，绿植被允许肆意生长，阻塞了人行道，将曾经优雅的爱德华时代度假胜地变成了“丛林之地”。

英国十分之九的议会以鼓励“生物多样性”为名，停止了对路边草坪和公园绿地的定期修剪。无论如何，这是他们的说法，而且他们坚持这么认为。

更有可能的是，他们将“不割草”加入了那些拿了钱却懒得去做的事情清单中——比如每周清理垃圾桶、平整人行道、填补坑洞等等——纯粹是为了省钱并裁员。

不修剪路边草坪不仅难看，而且可能极其危险。几天前，我在北伦敦当地购物区的一个匝道驶出，试图穿过一条主路右转。灌木长得太高，我完全看不到迎面而来的车辆——而我开的是一辆较高的SUV。

走在英国曾经精心维护的 27,000 个城市公园（这是我们光荣的市政遗产的一部分）中的任何一个，你会发现其中许多公园长满了黑莓、杂草和其他失控的植被。

这种疯狂的政策延伸到那些尚未被出售给开发商用于建房的剩余娱乐场和运动场，只是时间问题。

他们什么时候才会轮到板球场？如果现在的比菲·博瑟姆（Beefy Botham）在勋章球场（Lord's）的亭阁端投球，他将不得不穿过茂密的杂草丛和长草，并格外小心不要撞上那些被雇来维护外场的山羊。

而安迪·潘迪（Andy Pandy）在为当前的林火危机做些什么？在参加本周的眼镜蛇（Cobra）会议后，他宣布严厉打击一次性烧烤炉的销售，而负责任的超市已经将其从货架上撤下。

我们不需要首相来告诉我们这些铝制烧烤炉是火灾隐患。在我们当地的乡村公园里，每个入口都有巨大的告示牌，禁止使用便携式烧烤炉，并警告将严格执行相关规定。

他还承诺为全天候奋战在火线上的消防队提供更多资金。但这仅仅是在治疗症状，而非根除病因。

除非他约束那些野化狂热分子，倾听那些几个世纪以来一直照料土地的猎场管理员、农民和乡村居民的意见，并坚持让正规的防火隔离带优先于让自然野蛮生长，否则结果只有一个：

燃烧吧，宝贝，伯纳姆。

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前往邦德？劳登

为什么杰克正是 007 职位的最佳人选

目前正在为下一任詹姆斯·邦德举行试镜——一个新名字已进入候选名单。杰克·劳登（Jack Lowden）脱颖而出，他因在热门剧集《慢马》（Slow Horses）中饰演里弗·卡特赖特（River Cartwright）而闻名。

今年晚些时候，这位 36 岁的演员将在 Netflix 新改编的《傲慢与偏见》中饰演达西先生（对于任何演艺界帅哥来说，穿上燕尾服都是一种成年礼）。会是他吗？劳登是迄今为止被提及的最令人好奇的人选。他的年龄足够年轻，长相也足够英俊，足以饰演 007. 他是苏格兰人——这是另一个加分项——而且是个成熟的男人而非男孩，是一个有韧劲的人。他远超其他竞争对手。

其他入围的人选包括卡勒姆·特纳（Callum Turner，两眼靠得太近）、亚伦·泰勒-约翰逊（Aaron Taylor-Johnson，太漂亮）、路易斯·帕特里奇（Louis Partridge，太年轻）、汤姆·弗朗西斯（Tom Francis，太像男团成员）以及雅各布·埃洛迪（Jacob Elordi，求求上帝，千万不要）。祈祷邦德团队能做出正确的决定，选对人。

你在想她所想的事吗？

jan.moir@dailymail.co.uk

火药桶般的英国！ 除非旅程至关重要，否则请勿出行！商店必须停止销售便携式烧烤炉！不过你仍然可以买烟花！我们将为消防员提供额外资金！将建设九座新水库！而且我们还计划“帮助农民进行灌溉”。为什么工党应对热浪的那些杂乱无章、混乱不堪的计划让我感到如此绝望和阴郁？

主要是因为这些计划听起来不像是一个能够掌控国家危机的能干政府，而更像是一支在演习的“爸爸军队”（Dad's Army），真是悲剧。

不恰当？基迪斯早有前科……

沃格·威廉姆斯（Vogue Williams）批评了 63 岁的红辣椒乐队（Red Hot Chili Peppers）主唱安东尼·基迪斯（Anthony Kiedis）在 50 多岁时与一名 19 岁女孩约会。这并不违法，但正如沃格所说，仅仅因为你可以这样做，就意味着你应该这样做吗？

基迪斯在不恰当关系方面早有前科。事实上，有些人可能会说，这位纹身密布的摇滚歌手多年来一直逃脱了惩罚。在他 2004 年的自传《疤痕组织》（Scar Tissue）中，基迪斯承认在 23 岁时与一名 14 岁女孩有过性关系。

这段关系还被自豪地记录在乐队的热门歌曲《天主教学校女孩》（Catholic School Girls）中。

年龄差距：与伴侣艾琳·凯利（Eileen Kelly）相比，后者比基迪斯小 30 岁。

没什么好羞愧的！此后，基迪斯 24 岁时与流行歌手多诺万（Donovan）的女儿艾昂·斯凯（Ione Skye）开始了为期两年的恋爱关系。

艾昂现在是一名演员，但当时她只有 16 岁，在他们居住的加利福尼亚州属于未成年人。那又怎样？毫无顾忌的基迪斯在《疤痕组织》中放入了一张两人的裸照。真爱！1990, 他在乐队的一场演出后被判定犯有性侵犯和猥亵暴露罪，每项罪名被罚款 $1,000。

这些都没有让梅兰妮·奇尔森（Melanie Chisholm）退缩，她在 1999 年与基迪斯约会时 25 岁，长相年轻，当时仍被称为“运动辣妹”（Sporty Spice）。

我是这个世界上最不可能为前安德鲁王子行为辩护的人。但奇怪的是，他被妖魔化为恋童癖，而安东尼·基迪斯却连一丝谴责的耳语都没有？

迷信的养生大师 Moss —— 没人买账！

嘿，凯特·摩丝（Kate Moss）！本周，这位前超模正地中海的一艘游艇上放松身心，对自己那个在欠债 £290 万 的情况下关停的养生品牌完全不以为意，显得心满意足。

Cosmoss 是一个在封锁期间启动的项目，就像所有糟糕的想法一样。顾客们本应渴望购买她的“神圣之雾”（Sacred Mist）香水（前调为东加豆，含有“旨在让身体沉稳并提升精神”的植物提取物 —— 一瓶可怜的 100 毫升售价 £70）、一款承诺提供“自觉护肤方式”的 £50 面霜，以及一包售价 £20、用于“重置心情”的雪松味香棒。

想要让人们改变对这位从享乐主义者和麻烦制造者转变为晚年疗愈师的看法，仅靠这些迷信的垃圾是不够的。

没人买账，凯特。无论是在哪个层面上。

18+ 请访问 drinkaware.co.uk 了解事实。视供应情况而定。仅限部分门店。仅限英国。价格于 12.08.26 在 tesco.com 核实无误。价格和包装可能会有所不同。Tesco 可能会以其他价格销售其他产品。节省金额基于 Tesco 的该品牌产品与 Lidl 满足相同需求的同类产品成本的对比。详情请参阅 lidl.co.uk / savemore。

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Page 19

Jan MOIR

如果连特朗普的得力助手都无法兼顾职场母亲的身份，普通母亲又有什么机会？

MAGA 的宠儿卡罗琳·利维特（Karoline Leavitt）即将离开白宫。这究竟是怎么回事？是沉船上的第一只逃跑之鼠，是率先逃离疯人院的坚果——还是说，她只是另一个在迟暮之年意识到这种权衡并不值得如此艰苦奋斗的年轻女性？

卡罗琳深爱的特朗普总统在社交媒体上以赞许的措辞透露了她出人意料的离职，称他的新闻秘书——他此前将其描述为“聪明、强悍”且“高效”——离职是“为了能花更多时间陪伴家人”。

这位 28 岁的白宫发言人在 5 月生下了一个女儿维维安娜（Viviana），还有一个儿子尼科（Niko），出生于 2024 年 7 月。

起初，像许多女性一样，卡罗琳认为自己可以抱有希望。随后，当为人母在情感和实际层面的现实冲击而来时，她在公开声明中清晰地记录了心态的转变。

去年，利维特表示：“我认为每一位职场母亲都理解其中的要求。无论你在哪里，在做什么，都会有一种愧疚感。”

本周在社交媒体上，她评论说，自从第二个孩子出生后，她意识到，在投入工作所需的“持续时间、精力和注意力”的同时，她无法成为孩子们应得的那种母亲。

因此，她将在本月底离开这个享有盛名且备受瞩目的职位，或许会愉快地消融在 Napisan 婴儿奶粉和零食的浪潮中，从此销声匿迹。但不知为何，我对此表示怀疑。

利维特是不可救药的，也是不可撼动的，一个有一天可能自己能够担任 MAGA 高级政治职位的女性。特朗普已经

表示将让她以顾问身份留任，因为他不愿失去这位强大的操盘手。

在此我想说，虽然我认为利维特在她的岗位上表现得专业且出色，但她对那些质疑特朗普及其政府的记者的轻蔑态度是卑劣的，不可原谅的。尤其是因为美国理应是一个光辉的一流民主国家，而不是一个香蕉共和国。

白宫记者代表他们的读者、听众、观众以及广大选民在场。他们的职责是提出困难的问题，在后方投掷隐喻性的瓶子，挑战正统观念和统治政治精英。

为此，这群“麻烦制造者”被利维特斥为不诚实，是“左翼走狗”和“有偏见”的活动人士，而非值得她尊重且诚实的专业人士。如果她的职业生涯最终在洗尿布的琐碎中以抽泣着感叹“本可以如何”而告终，我个人绝不会为她这种具有腐蚀性的存在而感到惋惜。

但真正的重点是，如果卡罗琳·利维特都无法兼顾职场母亲的身份，普通母亲又有什么机会？利维特是一个“超人女性”，一个生活奢靡、使用 600 针高支数床单、五层阶级的高飞者，普通规则对她并不适用。

首先，她雇得起一支保姆大军。如果她想在白宫舞厅中央为她的宝贝孩子建一个镀金的托儿所，唐纳德·特朗普一定会亲自批准计划，只要他每天能下来参加饼干时间，并玩“给 JD Vance 贴尾巴”的游戏。

AND 而且，不仅仅是因为这位即将离任的新闻秘书据推测年个人收入超过 £100 万。也不仅仅是因为她嫁给了尼古拉斯·里乔（Nicholas Riccio），一位富有的房地产开发商，而他恰好比她大 32 岁。

在谈到两人的关系时，她说：“这很不典型，但行得通。”他们的结合也生动地描绘了女性主义职业经历中的缺失，因为现实是，只有男人——且仅有男人——才能真正地拥有一切。

看看里乔先生，他从未被迫放弃他获利丰厚的生意，无需职业中断，也不必担心保姆是否正确地给小儿子涂抹吐司上的黄油。他也不曾

曾经的他们：Brad Pitt 和 Jennifer Aniston 在 2000

我只希望布拉德和詹妮弗能复合

在戒酒七年后，布拉德·皮特又开始喝酒了。“我可以喝几[杯葡萄酒],”他告诉《Esquire》杂志。“但我不能喝太多。我必须对此保持专业。”康复社区对此感到震惊——他们说，他只是在自欺欺人。但不知为何，我认为布拉德会没事的。尤其是他又要和前妻

詹妮弗·安妮斯顿见面，进行温馨的老友约会。这就是全部。我生命中唯一想要的，就是布拉德和詹妮弗能复合。这将是一次比本周太阳和月亮在百年一遇的日食中相遇那件小事更伟大的重聚。让我们为我梦想中的幸福结局举杯。

他不必担心生育窗口正在关闭，因为对他来说，在58和60的高龄成为父亲并不是问题。

将此与亚历山德里亚·奥卡西奥-科尔特斯宣布冻结卵子的消息对比，她是为了在职业生涯弧线中更方便的时间迎来家庭而做前瞻性准备。我想建议，那个时间可能永远不会到来。

这位纽约民主党人今年36岁，尽管她在政治光谱上与利维特处于相反端，但她同样在努力应对职业抱负与建立家庭之间相互冲突的需求。

有些人将她的卵子策略斥为自私，但无论情况如何，选择为人父母的整个过程在某种程度上不都是自私的吗？像利维特和奥卡西奥-科尔特斯这样的女性，无论做不做都难免被指责——而她们共同的经历反映了各地年轻职场女性的困境。

尽管如此，我发现令人欣慰的是，这些聪明、年轻的女性不再相信那个令人精疲力竭的神话，即她们可以兼顾一切——这意味着事业繁荣、家庭生活 idyllic，以及职业和母亲身份带来的个人成就感。

放弃吧，姐妹。这根本不可能实现。这就是为什么卡罗琳选择了退出。也是为什么亚历山德里亚选择了冻卵。从她们截然不同的视角来看，她们看到了前辈女性所承受的高昂个人代价；这些女性往往被同等程度的企业职位嫉妒和母亲的愧疚感所掏空。

她们自己意识到，最终结果可能不值得这场博弈。因此，她们采取措施改善自己的处境，将母亲身份调整为适合自己的形状。你可能不同意她们的方法，但你不能责怪她们尝试。

“如果她想要一个金碧辉煌的白宫托儿所，特朗普一定会下来参加饼干时间，并玩‘把尾巴钉在JD·万斯身上’的游戏”

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Page 20

遮掩之美：凯蒂·佩里古怪的钩编披肩，以及（右）艾娃·隆格利亚穿着配套衬衫，完美契合所有标准

大胆之美：伊丽莎白·赫尔利迷人的遮盖装，以及（右）泰丝·戴利穿着配套套装

作者：谢恩·沃森

每个夏天都是观察名人泳装的好时机，但今年观察A级名人在海滩……以及在游艇、酒吧、泳池边的机会格外多。

贝克汉姆夫妇在“Seven”号游艇上连续待了数周，詹妮弗·安妮斯顿的随行人员（包括考特妮·考克斯）在马略卡岛附近的游艇上，我们瞥见了萨塞克斯夫妇在葡萄牙的海滩上，而阿曼达·霍尔登——正迅速取代伊丽莎白·赫尔利成为发布泳装照片最频繁的人——无处不在，而且这股热潮没有减弱的迹象。

以下是我们目前从地球上经验最丰富的度假者那里学到的关于中年海滩着装的知识……

坚持连体泳衣法则

在名人世界中，连体泳衣——只要它足够迷人且剪裁得当——偶尔能将分体泳衣挤下第一名的宝座。但竞争非常激烈，所以它必须恰到好处，且让穿着者看起来比穿比基尼时更美（参考贝拉·哈迪德穿着普拉达泳装的样子）。

不要：继续穿着那件过时的连体泳衣。52岁的凯特·莫斯目前正在伊比萨岛附近的福门特拉岛海岸度假，有人拍到她穿着一件深V领挂脖黑色连体泳衣从游艇上跳入水中——这是她轮换穿着的至少三件泳衣之一。遗憾的是，这件很快就需要退役了。

我们都经历过这种心爱连体泳衣的危机：陷入那件曾经很棒、现在却已过时的泳衣中，它再也无法像曾经那样完美地起到塑形和包裹的作用。即使是最优秀的人最终也会遇到这种情况，尤其是如果你没有仔细冲洗和晾干它们（我相当确定凯特并不擅长泳装保养）；它们最终会失去形状和弹性，导致腿部出现空隙，腹部紧贴，且整体下垂。这些全是最糟糕的敌人。

要：像80岁的金·哈恩这个夏天所做的那样，穿着你最喜欢的黑色连体泳衣，并搭配一件

如何窃取明星秘诀并在海滩上大放异彩

……以及哪些名人揭露了什么是不该穿的

围在臀部的纱笼。腿部松垮是最糟糕的，而这能瞬间解决该问题，同时遮住任何腹部凸起。

最大化你的遮阳外罩

我们生活在一个意识到阳光损伤的时代，无论你想看起来多么美，有些时候你都需要额外的遮盖。

这就是防晒泳衣（rash vests）、海滩外罩或一件轻便的长袖衬衫的用途。如果你临时凑合，你看起来就像是在瑞安航空办理登机手续时，为了减轻行李重量而被迫穿上行李箱里部分物品的人。

防晒泳衣的替代方案

不要：像41岁的凯蒂·佩里在圣特罗佩的 Les Palmiers 海滩俱乐部那样，穿着一件看起来像超大号钩编围巾的东西来保护胸部和肩膀免受阳光照射（如果你穿着无肩带泳衣，这一点尤为必要）。

示例B是57岁的詹妮弗·安妮斯顿，她选择将灰色长袖防晒泳衣披在身前，双臂垂在身后——这非常实用，当我们感觉到胸口开始灼热时都这么做过——但这绝对不迷人。一件与她柔软的白色棉质短裤相匹配的纯白色细棉衬衫会漂亮得多。

要：穿着长袖衬衫和短裤（即“套装”）。更好的是，像51岁的伊娃·朗格利亚那样，穿着2026年最顶级的时尚外罩——在配套的长款格子衬衫和短裤下穿着一件格子比基尼。这是全新的绝妙四件套。

迷人长裙

要：效仿伊丽莎斯·赫莉。她61岁了，依然在打破所有成年人穿着比基尼的规则——本月有人拍到她穿着一件薄荷绿挂脖比基尼，比基尼底裤两侧是链条链接（这比绳结款更难驾驭）。

毋庸置疑，她看起来一如既往地惊艳，但请注意，如今你会发现她大多在比基尼外面套一件轻盈飘逸的外罩。

她在这里穿的是一件经典的赫莉式外罩：开襟，开衩至大腿，半透明且飘逸，所以看起来并没有遮住多少东西，但至关重要的一点是它很长（短款无法提供保护）且宽松，在需要的地方提供了足够的伪装。

问题在于——每个50岁以上穿过比基尼的人都知道——不在于你正面看起来如何，而在于你走动时会发生什么。一件开襟、半透明外罩的垂坠感能模糊你的轮廓，并提供你想要的保护。

不要：过于得意，像57岁的特丝·戴利那样，在配套的泳衣外面套一件飘逸的海滩外罩。也不要把它套在剪裁精良的短裤外面。规则是下面只能穿泳装。理想情况下，也请省掉高跟鞋。

同色系纱笼

另一种迷人的替代方案是与比基尼配套的纱笼 / 长围裙，但这种三件套需要谨慎处理。它可能会显得土气，尤其是黑色款，而且由于面料具有弹性，并不总是能修饰身材。

不要： 选择尺寸过小的罩衫。凯蒂·佩里（Katy Perry）在七月再次前往法国南部时，穿着一件巧克力棕色的挂脖比基尼和配套纱笼——但问题在于这件纱笼并不

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一件好的比基尼关键在于平衡：詹妮弗·安妮斯顿（Jennifer Aniston）和（右）演员伊娃·隆格利亚（Eva Longoria）

古装剧：凯特·摩丝（Kate Moss）和（下方）贝拉·哈迪德（Bella Hadid）穿着连体泳衣

贴合，且被拉得太紧，导致一条腿一直露在外面。穿着纱笼时，你需要足够的覆盖范围以及活动空间，否则保护力不足（比如在圣特罗佩专属的 Le Club 55 享用午餐时），且无法在腰部以下营造出修身的线条。

要： 像金·豪恩（Goldie Hawn）那样，将一块布艺纱笼系在腰部一侧的高处。

并且可以穿比基尼

关于比基尼与连体泳衣的争论仍在继续（50 岁以上的人应该穿吗？60 岁以上的人还能穿吗？），但事实依然是，有些名人的身材在比基尼中的样子与 20 年前一样好——甚至更好。

然而，对于 50 岁后穿着比基尼有几条金科玉律，即使你的身材足以登上《体育画报》（Sports Illustrated）的封面。

底部平衡

詹妮弗·安妮斯顿在游艇度假时做平板支撑运动的照片成为了头条，因为她像在《老友记》（Friends）时期一样健美，但如果她早知道的话，可能会选择一件干练的修身比基尼底裤，而不是那种柔软的折叠款。

不要： 选择凌乱、无结构的底裤。如果你穿着丁字裤底裤或任何 XS 尺码的款式，请确保你的上装不是由几根绳子连接的两个微小三角形（伊娃·隆格利亚就领会到了这一点）。

要： 戴一顶宽檐帽。如果你看隆格利亚穿着橙色比基尼的照片，她的草帽檐宽度几乎与她的肩宽相当，这平衡了微型底裤带来的视觉感，同时让她看起来更优雅，且不那么暴露。神奇。

双层比基尼底裤

其实这就是在比基尼底裤外面穿了一条短裤，但这种宽松的超短裤仅作为比基尼底裤之上的额外覆盖层，让你在走动时感觉遮盖得更多一些——而且它们非常修身。

建议： 效仿 55 岁的阿曼达·霍尔登（Amanda Holden），将花卉比基尼与同色的运动抽绳迷你短裤搭配，并露出极小一部分比基尼底裤。这就是该造型的精髓。另一种选择是像詹妮弗·安妮斯顿（Jennifer Aniston）那样，穿着柔软、近乎透明的纯棉套穿短裤。

禁忌： 不要在一件式泳衣外面穿精致的剪裁短裤——正如泰丝·戴利（Tess Daly）被拍到的那样。抱歉，泰丝。

双层穿搭：阿曼达·霍尔登在比基尼外搭配了一条短裤

图片来源：BACKGREEL INSTAGRAM

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仅限英国和马恩岛 18+ 岁人士。需持有 Tesco Clubcard 会员卡。免费抽奖活动于 03 / 08 / 26 开始，01 / 09 / 26 结束（英国时间）。在 Tesco 门店或使用 Clubcard 在 在线杂货订单中符合条件的消费满 £25+ 即可自动免费参加。可通过 CustomerOptOut@.com 选择退出。每个 账户每天最多参加 1 次。共有 40 个度假奖品。奖品包括：在马略卡岛、达拉曼或扎金索斯岛享受 7 晚全包酒店住宿，往返经济舱机票，往返机场至酒店的接送服务，以及为 4 人共用一间家庭房提供 £500（以当地货币计）的消费金。视供应情况而定，部分日期不适用。 Travel Money 由 Traveles 提供。包含旅行保险。不可兑换现金（全部或部分）、不可交换、不可转让奖品、不可转售或退款。每位 会员最多获得 1 次度假机会。获奖者将通过 联系方式获得通知，且必须在 21 天内领取，12 个月内预订，并在通知后 18 个月内出行。额外宾客和升级费用由个人承担。推广方： Stores Ltd。奖品由第三方旅行社履行。适用排除条款及预订条款与条件。完整条款与条件请见 .com / tandcs

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102 岁失智老人被“推下酒吧舞台”后去世

作者：奥利维亚·戴（Olivia Day）

一名 102 岁老人被指被推下酒吧舞台后去世，其儿子表示希望获得“一定的公正”。

曾祖父菲利普·奥默罗德（Phillip Ormerod）据报道在要求一支朋克乐队调低音乐音量时被向后推搡。

奥默罗德先生患有失智症，在 8 月 1 日于南威尔士库姆布兰（Cwmbran）的 Crow's Nest 酒吧发生该事件后，因伤势危重被送往医院。

格温特郡警方（Gwent Police）昨日确认，该退休老人经过

[...OMITTED...]

“人们把他看作一个有个性的人”

在附近格温特郡兰弗雷奇法（Llanfrechfa）的格兰奇大学医院（Grange University Hospital）住了近两周的重症监护病房。

他的儿子罗伯特（Robert）是一名退休土木工程师，他表示父亲以前经常光顾那家酒吧，并将他描述为一个受欢迎的人物，年轻人在他喝酒时会帮他买啤酒。

他补充道：“发生的事情很不愉快。这家酒吧这些年来变化很大。它已经变成了年轻人的酒吧。我们只希望能获得公正。”

酒吧顾客表示，这位“可爱”但“意识模糊”的百岁老人是在翻唱乐队 SuperHans 表演时走上了舞台。据称，他随后被推开，向后摔在地上。

警方和威尔士救护服务局在晚上 10:25 接到报案。一名来自 Lla- 的 56 岁男子因涉嫌造成严重身体伤害而被逮捕，目前仍在接受调查，但并未被羁押。

该乐队经常在南威尔士各地的当地场所和酒吧演出，此后已删除了其 Facebook 和 Instagram 页面。

罗伯特透露，他的父亲在三年前被诊断出患有认知障碍症。

他说：“患有认知障碍症可能会让他变得难以相处。他每周走去酒吧两三次。他爱喝啤酒，我想有些人觉得在他这个年纪，他是个挺有个性的人。”

这位两个孩子的父亲讲述了自己是如何在父亲自 1960 年起居住的家中长大的。

他说，他的父亲曾从事设计绘图员的工作，自妻子在 40 年前去世后一直独居。

一名酒吧顾客说：“我当时从警方和工作人员那里了解到，这位 102 岁的老人独立生活且是酒吧的常客，他走上了有三级台阶的舞台，要求调低音乐音量。

他被推了一把，导致他从三级台阶上摔了下来，导致髋部骨折。”

另一位当地人说：“据信他被推得力度很大，以至于他不是从台阶上摔下来，而是直接飞过了台阶，落在下面的地板上。”

高级调查官谢莉·科姆利（Shelley Comley）侦缉总警表示：“我们理解公众对这一事件的关注，但想提醒大家，这不仅是一项正在进行的刑事调查，而且核心是一个正在承受失去亲人之痛的家庭。”

“请考虑不准确或投机性的评论——尤其是网络评论——可能会给他们带来的影响。”

在该乐队的页面从社交媒体上删除之前，一份声明写道：“出于个人原因，我（Josh）将退出 SuperHans 乐队的吉他手职务。”

RSPB 因猎鸟禁令收紧而受指责

《每日邮报》记者

工党被指在屈服于英国皇家鸟类保护协会（RSPB）的压力后，收紧了关于猎鸟的规定。

据报道，今年 1 月，该慈善机构首席执行官贝基·斯佩特（Beccy Speight）写信给当时的环境大臣艾玛·雷诺兹（Emma Reynolds）：“我写信是请求您尽快出台关于猎鸟许可的立法。我还请求您与我见面，紧急讨论此事。”

在收到信件两个月后，部长们在发布的一项新“土地利用框架”中提出了猎鸟许可的方案。

英国协会为

“证据应指导政策”

“射击与保护”组织的玛妮·洛夫乔伊（Marnie Lovejoy）表示：“可持续射击每年为经济贡献的估计价值达£33 亿，并每年提供相当于£5 亿的保护工作——这类证据应当成为任何影响乡村政策的核心。”

“一项似乎是基于游说信而非基于此类证据的提案，并不是正确的起点。”

斯佩特女士（Ms Speight）表示：“我们与所有政党的政府透明地合作，以帮助为影响自然和野生动物的决策提供信息。”政府则表示，其采取的是一种“证据优先的方法”。

主教被指“在朝圣期间强奸15岁女孩”

北安普顿主教因被指控在前往法国朝圣期间强奸一名少女而出庭。

70岁的大卫·奥克利（David Oakley）被指控在2000年代初期两次与该女孩发生性关系，该女孩当时年仅15岁。

在斯塔福德郡警方强奸与严重性犯罪小组的调查后，奥克利于6月被指控两项强奸16岁以下女孩的罪名。他昨天通过律师事务所的视频链接在威斯敏斯特治安法院出庭面对指控。

检察官莎拉·马登（Sarah Madden）告诉法院，奥克利和该女孩“在前往卢尔德朝圣后……开始约会”，并补充道：“她回忆起至少有两次与被告发生性关系。”

奥克利未被要求对指控进行答辩，案件已被移交给中央刑事法院（Old Bailey）。

3分钟冲刺可能比90分钟跑步对身体更有益

研究表明，仅进行3分钟的冲刺运动所带来的健康益处可能比90分钟的中等强度运动更多。

目前，成年人被建议每周进行至少150分钟的中等至高强度活动，如跑步或骑行。

但研究人员现在表示，短时间、高强度的爆发式运动可能是降低一系列健康问题（包括心脏病和糖尿病）风险的更好方式。

由纽约洛克菲勒大学一个团队进行的一项研究——发表在《细胞报告医学》（Cell Reports Medicine）杂志上——对比了不同强度的运动，发现六次30秒的全速冲刺触发了与健康和疾病相关的714种血液蛋白的快速变化。

作者：佐伊·哈迪（Zoe Hardy）

专家认为，这是因为高强度运动给包括心脏在内的肌肉带来了极端需求，迫使它们与身体其他部分进行快速沟通。作为响应，体内的细胞向血液中释放出一波信号分子，帮助调节能量消耗和组织修复。

相比之下，中等强度的骑行仅改变了七种蛋白质。

首席作者保罗·科恩（Paul Cohen）博士表示：“仅几分钟的高强度运动就能触发显著的分子反应。”

“而且在训练八周后，我们仍然能观察到这一现象。”

“那里有个阴凉的地方！”

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提摩西让人们对《旺卡2》猜测不已

《旺卡》（WONKA）得再等等了。提摩西·查拉梅（Timothee Chalamet）正在推迟《旺卡2》的开拍时间——该片原定于今年11月在英国拍摄——因为他还在决定下一步怎么做。编剧西蒙·法纳比（Simon Farnaby）告诉《综艺》（Variety）：“他想拍，但他不确定时间点或接下来想做什么。”他补充说，这部电影被“无限期推迟”。华纳兄弟对此持有异议，称谈论推迟是“完全错误的”。

受到警告的法纳比澄清道：“我100%没有说过《旺卡2》不会拍。每个人都在为此努力工作。这只是关于协调时间表的问题。”

Alison

在 X 上关注我 @alisonboshoff

故事终结于此……还是没有？瑞安·“煽风点火”的鲍尔多尼之争

本周，贾斯汀·鲍尔多尼（Justin Baldoni）的前公关人员指责瑞安·雷诺兹（Ryan Reynolds）在社交媒体上秘密地“煽动骚扰”——尽管《It Ends With Us》的法律之争在技术层面已经结束。

在雷诺兹的妻子布莱克·莱弗利（Blake Lively）与其前合作演员鲍尔多尼之间那场史诗级且耗资巨大的争端终于勉强收场三个月后，雷诺兹重新卷入纷争，并且显然点赞了两名亲莱弗利影响力人士的多条帖子，其中包括本周一条名为《贾斯汀·鲍尔多尼的问题行为》的帖子。

尽管雷诺兹随后“取消点赞”了该帖子，但他似乎点赞了“反厌女教育者”兼“男性权益倡导者”布伦特·麦克莱里（Brent MacLerie）的多条其他帖子，雷诺兹关注了其名为 ExPatriarch 的账号。

雷诺兹还关注了法律评论员 MorewithMJ（美国律师玛丽-简·莫利 Mary-Jane Morley），她与麦克莱里一样，推行一种强烈的反鲍尔多尼叙事。

看到雷诺兹这样量级的 A 级明星竟然屈尊地与“法律评论”群体互动，令人惊讶。更令人惊讶的是，考虑到他妻子的主要投诉之一就是她自己成了“报复性抹黑活动”的受害者——她表示很自豪能顶住这种压力。

然而，在法律诉讼过程中披露的是，雷诺兹深陷于此次事件的后果之中，向其经纪公司的团队发送了长篇愤怒的电子邮件。

在这些邮件中，他将鲍尔多尼描述为“捕食者”、“骗子”、“社会病态者”、“s***ball”、“人类舍入误差”以及“一桶蠢笨汁”。

他要求其经纪人确保获得公开道歉，并写道索尼（Sony）的高管们是“***ing教科书式的、无能的老年人”。

梅丽莎·内森（Melissa Nathan）在鲍尔多尼与女主角关系破裂的报道传出后被其短暂雇佣，她告诉我，亲莱弗利影响力人士的每一条帖子都会导致她以及她在 TAG PR 团队遭受“立即激增的骚扰”。

她说：“我一直受到这些法律评论员的不停攻击，他们简直是在煽动人们来攻击我，并且日复一日地编造和歪曲法律情况。”

“感觉我就像被霸凌了

“点赞”：莱弗利和雷诺兹

整整两年，每天如此。人们竟然把这些‘倡导者’的话当成真理——而瑞安·雷诺兹还在点赞这些帖子。”

这位《死侍》影星的亲近人士反驳道：“重要的是要注意有多少亲莱弗利的创作者受到攻击和骚扰。所有亲鲍尔多尼的账号每天都在攻击和骚扰布莱克。”

这些影响力人士中很少有人具备法律背景，他们根据某种观点产出内容——并通过煽动仇恨以此谋生。这种现象在 2022 年约翰尼·德普（Johnny Depp）与前妻安伯·赫德（Amber Heard）的冲突期间开始兴起。

今年 4 月，法院驳回了莱弗利 13 项主张中的 10 项，包括她对鲍尔多尼的性骚扰指控。法官裁定，由于她在电影中是以独立承包商而非雇员身份工作，因此不能根据联邦法律提起骚扰指控。她剩余的主张被允许进入审判程序。

次月，这些围绕“报复”展开的主张在庭外达成和解。随后的一份法院文件确认，该和解不涉及任何资金赔付。

由鲍尔多尼执导的《It Ends With Us》于 2024 年 8 月在电影院上映，期间有报道称鲍尔多尼与莱弗利在宣传巡演期间关系紧张。

在相互起诉的过程中，鲍尔多尼被其女主角贴上了“笨蛋导演”和“小丑”的标签，后者坚持要求修改剧本——随后要求制作她自己的剪辑版本……而该版本最终被用来取代了他的版本。

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Boshoff

请不要发生性关系：为什么 Z 世代成了新的禁欲主义者

如果我们拍一部性喜剧——但把所有的性爱戏份全部删掉，会怎么样？

这似乎就是被评论界痛批的电影《仅限一夜》（One Night Only）的情况。该片由莫妮卡·巴巴罗（Monica Barbaro）和卡勒姆·特纳（Callum Turner）主演，将于本月底在英国上映。

故事设定在一个反乌托邦的未来，婚前性行为被禁止，每年仅限一夜除外——而这正是艾莉（Allie，巴巴罗 饰，左）和欧文（Owen，特纳 饰）偶然相遇的那一夜。

这对演员之间没有可见的化学反应（见插图）；看过这部混乱的浪漫喜剧的人们在私下议论，这部电影糟糕到可能会损害特纳成为终极性感符号——

詹姆斯·邦德（James Bond）的机会。他目前是该角色最热门的人选之一。《仅限一夜》的导演威尔·格鲁克（Will Gluck）解释说，他最终拍出了一部没有性的性喜剧，因为年轻人——这部电影的核心目标受众——根本不喜欢在银幕上看到性爱场景。

他表示，电影的早期版本展示了许多人利用这“一夜”的机会……但试映结果显示，观众并不想看到这些。

他说他“就一直在剪掉这些内容”，并补充道：“我认为这是一种社会转变，人们不再接受在成人场景中出现裸体，而是把这些内容放在家里的手机上给每个人看。”

“现在，这更多是一种私密、亲密的事情，人们在共享体验（如电影院）时不想看到。一旦我意识到这一点，我就将其应用到这部电影中。我删掉了大量内容。”

萨曼莎·莫顿（Samantha Morton）和她的女儿埃斯梅·克里德-迈尔斯（Esme Creed-Miles）之间发生了什么？

图中两人从未给对方的社交媒体帖子点赞，而身为演员兼歌手的埃斯梅，对自己母亲在《奥德赛》（The Odyssey）中的角色（她饰演女神兼女巫喀耳刻）只字未提。她也没有给莫顿在电影宣传期间发布的任何 Instagram 帖子点赞。

甚至在 2024 年莫顿被授予英国电影学院（Bafta）会士荣誉时，她也没有给母亲的帖子点赞。

■ 荷马（HOMER）正迎来他的高光时刻——不是荷马·辛普森。克里斯托弗·诺兰的《奥德赛》的成功，推动了这位古希腊诗人史诗故事的译本登顶平装非虚构类图书排行榜，并且在精装非虚构类排行榜中也位列第二。

“噢，别再含糊不清了！”沃西对伍德尔说……

乔纳森·罗斯（JONATHAN Ross）对里奥·伍德尔（Leo Woodall）有些不满。

罗斯拥有一档名为《电影谈》（Reel Talk）的电影播客，他表示：“我注意到一种趋势，从《一天》（One Day）开始——他地台词地含糊不清的情况越来越严重，经常吞掉对话。”

“他是个性感的含糊者。他是个非常英俊的年轻人。但有时我很难听懂他在说什么。”

“他出演了那部 Apple 的剧集——那部剧并不太好——关于数学中某种秘密代码的内容（《素数目标》[Prime Target]，见图）。”

“我想说，‘把嘴张开，孩子！’我挺喜欢他的。我只是希望他能上几节发音课。”

人们常说，善行往往得不到好报。看看英国电影学院（Bafta）就知道了。英国电影电视艺术学院的美国分部——北美的 Bafta——不得不第二次推迟在好莱坞颁发三个“Bafta 荣誉奖”的计划。该学院去年夏天宣布，希望在 2025 年冬季于洛杉矶举行一场仪式，通过颁发三个标志性的金色面具，表彰在电影、电视和游戏领域的杰出成就。几个月后，该慈善机构

英国电影学院奖（Bafta）？如今没人想要

宣布该活动将推迟至2026年冬季。而现在看来，时间将定在2027年秋季。一名Bafta消息人士表示，最新的延迟是因为他们想要的场地无法提供。

■ 在美国的其他新闻中，他们已经收拾好帐篷并收起了彩旗，结束了《伟大的美国烘焙秀》（The Great American Baking Show）——即《英国烘焙大赛》（The Great British Bake Off）的美国版。该节目由保罗·好莱坞（Paul Hollywood）和普鲁·莱斯（Prue Leith）担任评委，并由两名美国主持人主持，在播出 4 个系列后被Roku取消。普鲁在今年1月宣布，86岁的她将离开GBBO，在即将播出的第四频道（Channel 4）系列节目中，她将被尼格拉·劳森（Nigella Lawson）取代。

《火箭人》主演塔伦将饰演速度之王

塔伦·埃格顿（TARON Egerton）正被考虑在一部传记电影中饰演注定悲剧的速度纪录打破者唐纳德·坎贝尔（Donald Campbell）。这位曾在《火箭人》中饰演埃尔顿·约翰（Elton John）的威尔士演员，将接手饰演这位大胆的英国人，他驾驶标志性的“蓝鸟”（Bluebird）车辆载入史册。1967年，他在湖区康尼斯顿水域（Coniston Water）尝试突破300英里 / 小时大关时去世，享年45岁。36岁的塔伦被认为是领衔这部电影的最佳选择，该片目前正处于Fremantle电影高管的早期开发阶段。

身为一名父亲且曾有过三任妻子的唐纳德，在20世纪50年代和60年代打破了八项绝对世界速度纪录。他仍然是唯一一位在同一年（1964年）同时创下陆地和水上世界纪录的人。

1967年，他驾驶的喷气式水上飞机——“蓝鸟K7”在以近300英里 / 小时的速度行驶时翻覆，导致他丧生。坎贝尔的泰迪熊吉祥物“威皮特先生”（Mr Whippit）以及他的飞行员头盔被发现漂浮在残骸中；但他的遗体以及“蓝鸟”的大部分机身直到2001年才被寻回。

这部尚未定名的电影探讨了他复杂的家庭生活，以及他执着于追随其父亲马尔科姆·坎贝尔爵士（Sir Malcolm Campbell）足迹的心理。马尔科姆爵士在两次世界大战之间尝试打破同样的纪录，并于1948年因自然原因去世，享年63岁。

注定悲剧：坎贝尔

图片：WARNER BROS / IN / STEWARTON / VSC IMAGES / SHUTTERDOCK-APPLITN-PROPER / 070 1M-GEITY

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一名据称患有产后精神病的绝望母亲。一名处于网络侦探瞄准之下的父亲。随着“美国最悲惨的谋杀审判”震惊世界……

作者：芭芭拉·麦克马洪（Barbara McMahon）

这三个天使般孩子的死亡，究竟该由谁来承担责任？

马萨诸塞州的沿海小镇达克斯伯里（Duxbury）拥有风景优美的海滩、优质的学校和适合家庭居住的环境，是帕特里克·克兰西（Patrick Clancy）和林赛·克兰西（Lindsay Clancy）抚养三个年幼孩子的理想之地。

这位 38 岁的微软高管及其妻子（曾是一名啦啦队成员和产科护士）是这个位于波士顿以南 35 英里的富裕小社区中的受欢迎成员，被认为是对 5 岁的科拉（Cora）、3 岁的道森（Dawson）和 8 个月大的卡兰（Callan）充满爱心且尽职尽责的父母。

在邻居看来，他们像是一对典型的年轻夫妇，在繁忙的日程和不断成长的家庭之间寻找平衡。然而，在三年前一个寒冷的冬日，这对表面上正常的中产阶级父母的生活被悲剧吞噬。

林赛在让丈夫去当地药店取药并买外卖晚餐后，做了一件看似不可理喻的事情。在一次持续数分钟且有计划的暴力行为中，她在房子的地下室掐死了她的三个孩子，然后回到楼上，通过割腕、割颈、吞服研碎的药片以及从二楼窗户跳下试图自杀。

在不到一小时后回到这座殖民地风格的护墙板房屋时，帕特里克·克兰西发现了两个难以想象的场景——他的妻子严重受伤地躺在花园的地上，而他的三个年幼的孩子则在脖子上套着橡胶运动带，处于昏迷状态。

孩子们被紧急送往医院，科拉和道森被宣布死亡。医生在婴儿卡兰心脏骤停后对其进行了抢救，但在维持生命系统支持三天后，他被判定为脑死亡，随后也相继离世。

上个月，林赛·克兰西的谋杀案审判在马萨诸塞州的普利茅斯高等法院（Plymouth Superior Court）开庭，并迅速吸引了美国及全球观众的关注。由于每天有五小时的电视转播，其中包含来自第一响应者的令人心碎的证据、悲痛欲绝的父亲对导致死亡之事件的亲身讲述，以及林赛周期性爆发的无法控制的抽泣，这场审判被冠以“美国最悲惨的谋杀案审判”之名。

现在，播客、真实犯罪论坛和社交媒体平台正充斥着业余侦探们的评论，他们都试图回答这场审判核心中那个沉重且日益引发分歧的问题。

她为什么要这么做？

此外，在网络犯罪评论圈的一些部分，人们在提出一个更进一步、甚至更疯狂的问题：真的是她做的吗？

本案的核心在于林赛在生下卡兰后的心理健康状况，以及由此延伸出的对所有患有产后疾病母亲的护理问题。

在卡兰出生后，林赛数月来一直与严重的心理问题作斗争——而帕特里克

法庭上的煎熬：帕特里克·克兰西，以及右侧他现在瘫痪的前妻林赛

在林赛报告出现包括严重失眠、心跳加速的焦虑以及自杀念头在内的症状后，这对夫妇多次为其恶化的精神状态寻求帮助，而帕特里克也在努力支持她。

她告诉另一位母亲，她“感觉像个僵尸”，并在笔记本中写道，照顾三个年幼的孩子让她感到“完全崩溃”，仿佛在“溺水”。

克兰西夫妇咨询了医生和其他专家。本周满 36 岁的林赛在短短几个月内被开了至少十几种药物，包括抗抑郁药、抗精神病药、助眠药和抗焦虑药。

由于健康状况没有改善，在 2022 年除夕，她自愿入住麦克莱恩（McLean）精神病院，这是该州排名顶尖的心理健康机构之一。然而，工作人员认为她是一名“低风险”患者，她在五天后被出院。

十九天后，在 2023 年 1 月 24 日的晚上，她杀死了她的孩子们。

在马萨诸塞州一个铺有木墙的美国法庭内，由助理地区检察官詹妮弗·斯普拉格（Jennifer Sprague）领导的控方声称，琳赛（Lindsay）共谋将丈夫诱骗出屋，并蓄意、谨慎且冷酷地策划了这些谋杀案。

琳赛的辩护律师凯文·雷丁顿（Kevin Reddington）因其冷静、细致的询问风格以及对琳赛明显的同情而迅速成为网络红人。他表示，他的当事人并不否认她在孩子死亡中所扮演的角色。相反，他认为她被一个疏忽的医疗群体辜负了，他们给她开了过量的药物，且未能对其进行正确诊断。

他声称，琳赛对这起三重杀人案不承担刑事责任，因为她当时正处于产后心理健康危机，这扭曲了她的现实感。他认为，诊断她患有产后抑郁症的医生未能准确识别出一种更为罕见且更严重的状况——产后精神病（PPP），这是一种与分娩后的压力、睡眠不足和激素变化相关的严重疾病。

产后精神病影响约 1,000 分之一的母亲，其症状包括情绪极高或极低、幻觉、妄想和极度混乱。

在证词的某个环节，帕特里克（Patrick）描述了妻子在杀死孩子后低声说的话：“她说她听到一个男人的声音告诉她，如果现在不做，她将失去机会。”

由于那天晚上从窗户坠落，琳赛现在腰部以下瘫痪，需使用轮椅。当她坐在辩护席上，偶尔紧握雷丁顿的手时，她显得虚弱且充满愧疚，人们经常觉得看着她很揪心。

在法庭上一个格外情绪化的日子里，当婴儿卡兰（Callan）的尸检照片向陪审员展示时，她躲在长长的黑发后面，身体因抽泣而颤抖。

在另一个令人心碎的日子里，当帕特里克在发现孩子尸体后在 911 电话中发出刺耳尖叫时，她

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照片：DAVID BLAKES / DAVID BLAKES

微笑背后的折磨：帕特里克和琳赛·克兰西（Lindsay Clancy）与她后来承认杀害的孩子们——科拉（Cora）、道森（Dawson）和卡兰（Callan）

反复崩溃。这是她第一次听到那通紧急电话。

就在此前不久，帕特里克描述了自己办完事回家并呼唤家人的情景。在没有人回应后，他搜查了孩子们的房间和浴室，随后发现主卧室到处是血，且窗户开着。

现在，业余侦探们纷纷排队发表意见。其中大部分是对证据的理性且深思熟虑的分析，许多在线评论者（主要是女性）支持琳赛。

有些人谈到了自己经历的产后抑郁，表示即使他们没有伤害自己的孩子，但他们对这位年轻母亲所经历的一切表示同情，并且认为男性无法完全理解产后医疗状况的复杂性。

但在一个出人意料且令人不安的进展中，人们对帕特里克的同情寥寥无几，有些人声称他也需要回答一些问题。他是否给了妻子足够的支持？当她如此明显地处于危机点时，他难道不应该承担更多照顾孩子的责任吗？更阴森的是，一小部分但数量在增加的阴谋论者在没有任何证据支持其主张的情况下，直接指控帕特里克才是真正的罪犯，是他陷害妻子、对其进行精神控制（gaslighted）并让她相信是她杀死了孩子。“我的直觉反应是他干的，”一名评论者宣称，而另一名评论者则正义凛然地写道：“我绝对相信是丈夫干的……应该有人告诉法官。”

“社交媒体的本质就是滋生阴谋论，在这种案件中，每个人都能变成一个廉价侦探，”前检察官兼刑事辩护律师杰克·赖斯（Jack Rice）告诉《每日邮报》。“我们看到越来越多的人在脑海中凭空捏造。证据变得无关紧要，如今起决定作用的仅仅是人们的观点。我们已经在政治领域看到，只要你自信地地表达某件事，它就一定是真的，而现在这种情况正渗透到刑事司法系统中。”

虽然威廉·沙利文（William Sullivan）法官在审判开始时提醒陪审员，他们不能基于情感来判定案件，但对于数百万在旁观这场家庭悲剧的人来说，并没有这样的限制，而且有些人显然在充分利用这一点。尽管执法官员和检察官多次表示，帕特里克（Patrick）并未参与这起令人心碎的事件，且已被证明没有违规行为，但网络上对帕特里克的反感仍是关于克兰西（Clancy）案最热门的讨论话题之一。

键盘侠们指出这位丧女之父在证人席上的举止“冷漠”，而对于法庭在场的人来说，这位商人当时显然是在被迫重新经历每个父母最可怕的噩梦时，在拼命努力保持冷静。

批评者还指出，他在与琳赛（Lindsay）离婚后“很快”就再次结婚，一些业余侦探暗示他在谋杀案发生前就出轨了。帕特里克于今年4月在纽约与生育医生瑞秋·丹尼斯（Rachel Danis）结婚，距离那场悲剧已过去三年。

在在线讨论组中最受欢迎的是对目前提交给陪审团的证据中“不一致”之处的剖析。一个关于帕特里克更换鞋子的理论在网上疯传，称他在去药店为女儿取药时穿着靴子，然后几分钟后换上运动鞋去取外卖，正如闭路电视（CCTV）画面所示。然而，这种明显的差异更有可能是由于不同商店的光线造成的。其他人则声称，当天晚上发送的一封“可疑”电子邮件引发了进一步的疑问。帕特里克大约在下午 5. 离开家，大约在下午5:32到达药店，但发给员工的一封电子邮件的时间戳是下午5:24。

社交媒体用户质疑，在他应该在办理杂事的时候，是如何发送工作邮件的。在妻子律师的质询下，帕特里克表示他不确定该邮件是从笔记本电脑还是手机发送的，这增加了混乱。业余侦探们认为，如果是从笔记本电脑发送的，他一定是在家里而不是在商店，这与警方的记录时间线不符。法庭上尚未出示任何证据支持这一理论。

其他“异常”之处还包括一张床的重量，据称琳赛为了能从二楼窗户跳下而移动了这张床。网络阴谋论者声称，她无法独自移动这件沉重的家具，而是帕特里克在将她推下窗户后布置了现场。

网络上最离奇的理论或许是，帕特里克亲自实施了犯罪并陷害他的妻子，因为他想在没有家人的情况下开始新生活。有些人甚至进一步暗示，帕特里克本人就是妻子脑海中那个告诉她杀死自己和孩子们的男性声音。

最近在TikTok上对 63,000 人进行的一项民意调查显示， 91 per cent 的受访者认为帕特里克有罪。

“人们想要一个反派，”美国最受尊敬的法律评论员之一赖斯说道。“面对三个死去的孩子，谁能不认为必须有人为此付出代价？”

“他们把责任推给他 [帕特里克]，因为人们认为她 [琳赛] 当时神志不清，或者人们很难相信一位母亲会杀死自己的孩子。我认为他在证人席上的冷静表现让人们觉得，这不像是一个无辜家长的反应，一定有什么阴险的企图。这就是导火索，随后人们开始寻找任何其他不一致之处。”

随着关于帕特里克有罪的阴谋论四处传播，即使是获得过普利策奖的报纸《波士顿环球报》也感到有必要指出，在“误导信息和谎言”之中，互联网正将这位丧子之父推上审判台。

迈阿密大学社会学和犯罪学教授亚历克斯·皮奎罗（Alex Piquero）表示：“最令我担忧的是，人们在没有掌握全部事实的情况下就匆忙下结论，并影响他人的思考。这既没有教育意义也毫无帮助，而且可能会产生负面后果。”

在进一步的转折中，一名叫作艾米莉·索恩代克（Emily Thorndike）的社会工作者发布了一段 TikTok 视频，反驳了检方的说法。检方此前称，治疗琳赛心理健康问题的麦克莱恩医院（McLean Hospital）提供的是五星级的世界一流服务。索恩代克化身为举报人，她“希望纠正检察官所使用的误导信息”，并声称在某个假期期间，一名医生竟然要负责 23 名患者，这一说法在网上迅速走红。

辩护律师雷丁顿（Reddington）现已请求索恩代克出庭作证，这令检方感到沮丧。萨利文法官表示，他将在适当的时候对此事做出裁决。

谈到新出现的证据，赖斯表示：“每个人都在关注这个案件，每个人都有自己的看法，但这并不总是意味着这些看法没有价值。他们可能会看到其他人忽略的东西。”

与此同时，帕特里克表示他原谅了他的妻子，并认为她是病了而非邪恶。对于网络上针对他的虚假指控，以及他的生活被数百万陌生人放在显微镜下审视这一事实，他未发表评论。

他和琳赛分别提起诉讼，指控她的多名医疗服务提供者（其中一些人她仅通过 Zoom 见过面）未能对其进行正确的诊断、治疗和监测。

如果陪审团认定她谋杀罪名成立，她将面临终身监禁且不得假释。如果因缺乏刑事责任能力而被判定无罪，她将被送往州立精神病院。无论结果如何，只要看看她在法庭上的样子，就能知道她的生活已永远被毁了。

审判预计将持续数周，这将给网络评论员更多时间来宣扬他们那些毫无根据的理论——而这对于处于这场宛如希腊悲剧般故事中心的两位悲痛父母来说，无疑是极大的煎熬。

--。

假冒陪侍兼情妇在性交易骗局中杀害两名男子被判入狱

作者：Cameron Charters 和 Olivia Day

一名九岁男孩询问杀害他父亲的凶手，为什么他们不“直接拿走他的钱”，因为他们为了偷钱而在他的饮料中下了致命药物。

在一段令人心碎的陈述中，Alfie Mouat 表示，罗马尼亚籍凶手 Adina Mihai（31岁）和 Madalin Dumitru（30岁）“摧毁”了他的家庭。

这对情侣还使用同样的方法杀害了一名千万富翁大猎手，并向另外两名男子投毒，但那两人幸存了下来。

去年7月12日至13日期间，Mihai 在 Vivastreet 网站上伪装成性工作者，以此骗入位于牛津郡班伯里（Banbury）的 37 岁男子 Gary Mouat 的家中。

进入屋内后，她在 Mouat 先生的酒杯中放入了镇静剂，并等待他失去意识。他再也没有醒来。

随后，她邀请男友 Dumitru 进入屋内，洗劫包括珠宝在内的贵重物品。

两人在昨天于牛津刑事法院（Oxford Crown Court）被判处 17 年监禁，此前他们承认了两项过失杀人罪以及向另外两名男子投毒的罪名。

在一段预录的陈述中，

被投毒者：Gary Mouat 和大猎手 Malcolm King

认罪者：Adina Mihai 和 Madalin Dumitru

Alfie Mouat 说：“你们为什么要杀我的爸爸？你们本可以直接拿走钱的，他真的很善良，他会给你们的。”

“你们毁了我的生活，以及我们计划一起做的所有事情。我的家庭现在被摧毁了。我现在再也没法和爸爸一起去看足球赛了。我也没法和他一起喝我的第一杯啤酒了。”

这对来自埃塞克斯郡伊尔福德（Ilford, Essex）的男女还使用同样的方法杀害了 80 岁的 Malcolm King，他是一位千万富翁且资深的大猎手。

在用一种被称为 gamma butyrolactone（简称 GBL）的药物给受害者下药之前，Mihai 会先查明他们存放贵重物品（包括劳力士手表和现金）的位置。

Mouat 先生是一位成功的玻璃生意人，已婚，但在他去世的那晚，他的妻子和儿子都不在家。

在宣判时，Brunner 法官表示：“如果你们做过最简单的研究，就会知道 GBL 可能具有极强的毒性。”

负责起诉的 Julian Evans KC 表示，Mihai 和 Dumitru 的“自信源于每位受害者认为他们所同意参与的活动显然具有敏感且令人尴尬的性质”。

---

Eden & Confidential

殖民地房间俱乐部（Colony Room Club）最后一次点单引发愤怒

这里仅有一个“男女混用”的单间厕所，而店主则偏爱一件印有“戒毒所是给失败者准备的”标语的 T 恤。伦敦殖民地房间俱乐部这一独特的传奇，想必永远不会消亡。

但这并未能阻止它的关闭。就在这个饮酒窝点被凯旋般地复兴仅三年后，它便宣告结束。其墙壁被刷成了令人作呕的绿色，对于原苏豪区（Soho）店面的常客来说，这种颜色瞬间就显得如此熟悉——那里曾接待过玛格丽特公主，年轻的丹尼尔·克雷格也曾在那里担任酒吧服务员。

原店面还接待过包括广播员梅尔文·布拉格（Melvyn Bragg）和艺术家特蕾西·艾敏（Tracey Emin，如图所示）在内的名流。

附近重新开业的地下室版本曾深受鲍勃·格尔多夫（Bob Geldof）的青睐，而它的终结并非悄无声息。事实上，据我所知，它倒闭后的场景会让其创始人穆里尔·贝尔彻（Muriel Belcher）感到欣慰。贝尔彻是一位好斗的女同性恋者，她迎接弗朗西斯·培根（Francis Bacon）和卢西安·弗洛伊德（Lucian Freud）等常客时会说：“你好，小婊子！”同样会感到欣慰的还有她的继任者伊恩·博德（Ian Board），一个酗酒到球状鼻子“像腐烂的番茄一样跳动”的同性恋打手。

据我了解，《殖民地房间故事：苏豪区失落的波希米亚》（Tales From The Colony Room: Soho's Lost Bohemia）的作者、同时也是负责重建该俱乐部的艺术家达伦·科菲尔德（Darren Coffield）在得知业主想要收回场地时愤怒不已。“他说他只得到了八天的通知，这简直荒谬——根本没时间通知所有人，”一位朋友告诉我。

“他一听到消息，就带着三个行李箱冲下去，把所有放进俱乐部的东西都打包了。”56 岁的科菲尔德自 1988 年起就是会员，他收集了一大批俱乐部的零碎古玩——但并不包括展柜里的那把 AK47 突击步枪。

该场所的所有者是一对夫妇，餐厅经营者汤姆·奥尼恩斯（Tom Onions）及其妻子普鲁·弗里曼（Prue Freeman），其发言人向我保证，关于关闭事宜已经进行了“数月”的讨论。

在将殖民地房间的第二次化身描述为“一个深受喜爱的弹出式装置”时，他补充说，其生命周期最初计划为三个月，后来被“延长到了三年”。

我得到保证，那把 AK47 正在为其所有者丹·麦克米伦（Dan Macmillan）保管。他是前首相哈罗德·麦克米伦（Harold Macmillan）的孙子，也是凯特·摩丝（Kate Moss）的前情人，后者也曾在酒吧后面值班。

前皇家牧师：我对国王的统治权失去了信心

前女王牧师表示，查尔斯国王违反了他的加冕誓言，未能捍卫基督教信仰。

在今年的主权拨款年度报告中，白金汉宫将国王的“信仰捍卫者”头衔替换为了“多信仰国家中信仰空间的保护者”。

加文·阿申登（Gavin Ashenden）在担任女王牧师九年后辞职，此前他曾批评过一场邀请穆斯林学生朗读《古兰经》的教会礼拜。对此他感到震惊。他表示，国王“背弃了基督教的忠诚，违背了他的加冕誓言，[并且]否认了对基督教文化的支撑与推广”。

“有些人正在质疑，他的行为是否具有足够的颠覆性，以至于让人对其履行国王职责的能力产生疑问。”

■ 查尔斯国王正以 1 万英镑 的价格出售他自己的一幅画作的复制品，但现在他的皇家收藏信托基金（Royal Collection Trust）希望有人能照看一位价格更高昂的艺术家的作品。该基金正在招聘一名年薪 3.5 万英镑 的目录研究员，以便在重大出版计划前记录列奥纳多·达·芬奇的近 600 幅素描。皇家网站上的广告称：“你将驻在温莎城堡，协助准备一份详尽的列奥纳多素描学术目录，计划于 2030 / 31 年出版。”

■ 这正是人们梦寐以求的事情——欧律节奏（Eurythmics）组合重组的可能性。“我认为如果不这样做会很遗憾，”戴夫·斯图尔特（Dave Stewart）说道，他与安妮·伦诺克斯（Annie Lennox）共同组成了这支 20 世纪 80 年代的波普新浪潮二人组。“我们有几段在 2000 年录制的、从未公开的录音。它们非常惊人——听起来就像经典的欧律节奏。”

■ 理查德·奥斯曼（Richard Osman）习惯于构思虚构的罪案，但他的最新作品几乎让他陷入一场现实生活中的法律纠纷。这位 55 岁的作家在 2024 年的畅销书《我们解决谋杀案》（We Solve Murders）中将新森林的 The Pig 酒店作为场景，因为他曾在那里入住并熟悉其布局。但在他即将出版的续作《我们追逐阴影》（We Chase Shadows）中，有一场戏是经理为了获取信息而接受贿赂。“我不被允许那样写，因为那会构成诽谤，”奥斯曼说。“我想，‘好吧，我会把他们安置在一家完全不同的酒店里’。”

为亚历克萨的日食头饰脱帽致敬

对于伦敦社交圈的成员来说，在度假观看月亮遮挡太阳时，太阳食眼镜显然是不够的。

模特兼电视明星亚历克萨·钟（Alexa Chung）和鲍勃·格尔多夫（Bob Geldof） 35 岁的女儿皮克希（Pixie）在西西里岛的一次观赏派对上戴着手工制作的锡箔帽子。

皮克希的帽子上甚至装饰了太阳和月亮（右），而亚历克萨的则较为简单（左）。

“观赏派对，当月亮遮蔽太阳之时，” 42 岁的亚历克萨在发布这些在线照片时这样写道。

皮克希的丈夫、38 岁的音乐家乔治·巴内特（George Barnett）也加入了他们，两人育有一个五岁的女儿。

关注我 ✉ @richardaeden 以及 Instagram @edenconfidential richard.eden@dailymail.co.uk

--。

工党“需40年才能达成NHS候诊名单目标”

人数以每月仅8,000人的速度下降

一项严厉的分析表明，按照目前的患者治疗速度，工党将需要40年才能达成NHS（英国国家医疗服务体系）的候诊名单目标。

这意味着英国人将面临数十年的痛苦，在等待髋关节和膝关节置换等常规手术时，等待时间将极其漫长。

作者：Shaun Wooller 健康编辑

政府已承诺，到2029年3月，92%的患者在收到全科医生（GP）转诊后的18周内将接受治疗。这将要求候诊名单从目前的727 万下降到约350 万——即每月减少114,000人。

但NHS England的数据显示，尽管耗资数十亿英镑，过去一年每月平均仅能减少7,962人。按照这个速度，需要40年才能将候诊名单降低至350 万。

影子健康大臣Stuart Andrew表示：“用40年时间来达成

为周末做好准备。

1升 £18.50

仅限英格兰

be drinkaware.co.uk

更多在 Morrisons 购物的理由

门店及在线统计 Morrisons Daily。Stella，体育及2 for £20啤酒优惠现已推出。由于最低单位定价法，仅限英格兰。由于最低单位定价法，最佳葡萄酒优惠仅限英格兰和威尔士。Stella Arroco, Braddock, D.84 / 3 / 4re。葡萄酒优惠需额外支付£8.0。最佳葡萄酒。The Presents。£18.50. The Cramers De Cerveau Rose。£12.50. The Slaw。£10. The Dooms Red。£9.75. 新西兰长相思白葡萄酒。£10.25. 2 for £20啤酒优惠。Bona Munch。£14.50mL £18.25. £4.60 / 3mL。海尼根（Heineken）。£14.50mL £14.25. £3.19 / 3mL。Strongbow原味苹果酒。$8+440mL £14.25. £1.79 / 3mL。Corona Emu。£14.50mL £15. £3.28 / 3mL。Chucampo。$8+440mL £15. £1.64 / 3mL。Stella和葡萄酒优惠及$6.50 / 3mL。

“必须掌控这场危机”

工党自身的NHS候诊名单目标显示了他们目前的差距之大。

“工党必须停止伪装其失败的候诊名单计划正在起作用，并必须掌控这场危机。”

健康大臣Yvette Cooper感谢了NHS工作人员在“这个极具挑战性的夏天所付出的非凡努力”，因为候诊名单在6月份首次出现下降，这是自2011年以来的首次。6月份，约65.8%的患者在转诊后18周内开始了医院治疗。

KUROSU

今日难度评级

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答案见《邮报》谜题页末页

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Ephraim Hardcastle

专业人士

曼彻斯特人 Nick Robinson（实际上来自 20 英里外的麦克尔菲尔德）在庆祝 Andy Burnham 让“曼彻斯特主义”大行其道。这位 Radio 4 的主持人最近获得了曼彻斯特大学的荣誉博士学位，他兴奋地向学生们表示，这座城市是“一个活生生的、有呼吸的、充满活力的例子，展示了生活如何变得更好，以及人们如何让世界变得更美好”。Robbo 现在承认：“回头读这些话让我感到有一点尴尬。”Andy，快把这个老傻瓜签下来吧。

当 Burnham 在敲响北方的鼓点时，王室对诺福克以北英格兰省份的热情似乎寥寥无几。“唯一一个王室北方的公国（约克）显然最好不要提及，”一名宫廷助手指出。在更北的地方情况有所改善：“我记得玛格丽特公主是最后一位正式出生在苏格兰的王室成员，时间是 1930 年。不过 Archie 可能是在凯斯内斯的梅城堡被孕育的。”

随着他那备受质疑的自传首先在美国上架，富有想象力的前剑桥教授 Jason Arday 是否能获得同样是回忆录作者的哈里王子的支持？后者在 2023 年写道：“在我记得的事情以及我记得的方式中，包含的真相与所谓的客观事实一样多。”我们这个时代的“历史男孩”们！

Jeremy Clarkson 维持着一个（令人厌烦的？）年度传统，提醒那些失望的 A-level 学生，尽管他在 1970 年代只拿到了“一个 C 和两个 U”，但他仍属于生活中的赢家。他说：“今晚，我将坐在我宜人的花园里，喝着我自己酿酒厂的啤酒，吃着我自己农场的食物。由我自己的厨师准备。”

BBC 板球主持人 Alex Hartley（如图）回忆说，当她在拥挤的火车上发现自己与休·格兰特四目相对时，她感到脸红心跳。尽管显然不是电影迷，这位前英格兰国家队成员仍坚持在那个老魅力男打盹时偷偷拍了几张照片。后来有人向这位兰开夏郡姑娘指出，她拍的其实是喜剧演员 Rob Brydon。

布赖恩·梅爵士对他的乐队 Queen 那些不光彩的 AI 图像表示不满，他警告说：“也许现在是意识到我们实际上不需要 AI 的时候了！”不过，布赖恩承认他不反对通过 Abba 风格的全息投影演唱会来获利，在演唱会上展示乐队全盛时期的样子。

前《电报报》编辑 Charles Moore 在《旁观者》杂志中写道，他认为自己应对 Rod Liddle 在 2002 年公开嘲讽乡村联盟（Countryside Alliance）游行后离开 BBC 负责：“令人难以置信的是，BBC 按照我的要求解雇了 Rod。几乎在瞬间，我感到了刺客般的悔恨。”不过，Moore 愉快地总结道：“他从广播大楼的囚禁中获释，是他经历过的最好的事情。”

电子邮件：ephraim.hardcastle@dailymail.co.uk

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秘密与生活

那是某种在熟睡时试图与你发生性关系的人。正如 Jodie 所发现的，这种奇异的病症会给一段充满爱的关系带来毁灭性的打击

那个夜晚闷热潮湿，我踢开被子，翻来覆去试图入睡。

在我身边，交往五年的伴侣 Matt 睡得死沉，我很羡慕他无论温度如何都能入睡的能力。

但就在我终于迷糊过去之后，我被 Matt 爬到我身上，用膝盖顶开我的双腿给惊醒了。我花了一会儿才意识到发生了什么。

不，这不是什么奇怪的梦，我的男朋友真的似乎在试图与我发生性关系，他的眼神中带着一种熟悉的迷茫感。

在那一刻，我最不想要的事情就是这个，幸好，在我大喊他的名字并摇醒他之后，他瘫在我身上，轻声打起鼾来。在将他滚回床的另一侧后，我在闹钟响起前设法获得了几个小时不被打扰的睡眠。

我的反应可能看起来很——

请翻至下一页

图片：GETTY IMAGES 由模特拍摄

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SECRETARÍA & LITRES

被我的清洁工解雇（两次！）的耻辱

Richard GETTY

也许这得怪我有五个孩子、五条狗和两只猫（外加四只鸡和一匹马，不过它们不能为地板上的乐高积木和沙发上的团团皮毛负责）。我的房子永远处于混乱状态。

而这肯定就是为什么清洁工们一直解雇我的原因。因为在雇佣——更关键的是留住——一名清洁工这个循环往复的过程中，有一个心照不宣的伟大准则：在他们到来之前，你的房子基本上必须是洁净的。

当我们刚搬进这座位于埃塞克斯（Essex）的六卧室农舍时，我们只有三个孩子，塑料玩具的浪潮和成团的猫毛还没有渗透进来。

然而，在抵达几个月后，我看向厨房窗外，意识到窗外田园诗般的景色正日益被布满绿头苍蝇的蜘蛛网和肮脏的手印所遮挡。我意识到了光线——或者说，没意识到——并意识到这栋房子正变成一个健康隐患。

起初我们使用中介派遣的清洁工，他们到来时的样子就像水桶里浑浊的水一样毫无生气。我记得盯着那把肮脏的拖把，就知道他们自从上一次干活以来就没把它冲洗过。这不是一个好的开始。

当我要求清洁二人组中的一人熨烫几件衬衫时，她单手操作，这并非标志着她熨烫技术高超，而是为了空出另一只手拿手机。

我们决定找一名非中介的清洁工，以便能建立起某种关系。一个当地人。一个能了解我们家庭怪癖，且不会在我丈夫的衬衫上留下新褶皱的人。

第一个来面试的女士——回想起来，这更像是她在面试我们——说她每周需要六个小时才能搞定这栋房子。六个小时！她是正确的，但这让她太贵了。

于是我们诱惑了一个标准较低的人——低得多。

就是这位清洁工，当其中一条狗在厨房地板上

作者：SYBILLA HART

出了意外，她用我那台无袋式Shark吸尘器的吸管把粪便吸了进去。

当我对此提出质疑，内心感到不可思议，且无论我往吸尘器里倒入多少消毒剂，那台Shark依然臭气熏天时，她说因为她的背不好，无法弯腰捡起那个令人反感的东西。

好吧，我当时怀孕九个月，也干不了这活。这房子简直是在向狗低头。我们发生了争执，她把我这个客户给解雇了。

后来一个朋友提到了安娜（Anna），她以“清洁巫师”著称。但朋友警告说，我永远没机会排到安娜的档期。她不仅有候补名单，而且肯定会对我的孩子和动物动物园嗤之以鼻。尽管如此，还是值得打个电话试试。

最终我想安娜可怜我了，在经过一番即兴哀求后，她同意将我挤进她的日程表，每周工作双方都能接受的三小时。

我欣喜若狂。安娜迅速地清理完房子，用她那一套定义精准的彩色抹布给每个房间除尘。当她把浸透的拖把头装进塑料袋准备带回家洗时，我松了一口气。

她似乎甚至不在意过剩的小猪佩奇周边，也不在意泥泞的爪印。安娜简直是上天派来的，我爱死她了。

考虑到她开始工作时房子的状态，我更加如此。我刚刚生了第五个孩子，我不会假装那里不像个垃圾场。

那时，孩子们分别是 12 岁、九岁、六岁和四岁，外加一个新生儿，而我要么在哺乳，要么在照顾小家伙们。整理家务被排在了（巨大的洗衣）堆的最底层。

起初，这似乎没有难住优秀的安娜……但随着时间的推移，裂痕开始显现。

有一天，在她为我们工作两年后的一个日子里，我坐在沙发上，一边应付着蹒跚学步的孩子，一边操作着工作笔记本电脑，我为房子很乱而道歉。

这一次，我注意到气氛发生了微妙的变化。“看来那里没什么变化，西比拉，”她回答道，眼神中透着一丝强硬。

诚然，那天早晨过得并不顺利；孩子用苏多霜（Sudocrem）把其中一只狗涂满了，而我最喜欢的华伦天奴（Valentino）Waterlily 腮红不知怎么地翻在了床单上。

我环顾四周。屋里的情况比平时更糟糕。难道安娜每周的到访让我产生了一种虚假的安全感？难道我已经放弃努力了？

于是我试图提高标准，但大势已去。即使是最圣洁、最专业的清洁工也有她的极限，我开始收到安娜发来的各种信息，为她不能来找各种借口。她的车发动不了。她感冒了。她的孩子也感冒了。连狗也感冒了。

当她真的来的时候，态度变了。她总是斜眼看着屋里的样子，打开卧室门时会发出不满的哼声，在面对浴室时则会发出清晰的叹息。她那审视的目光让我感到越来越尴尬。

等到我的小儿子三岁开始上幼儿园时，她终于受够了。是的，我再次被她以客户的身份“解雇”了。

她说，所有的宠物毛发都触发了她的过敏反应，而且她到达时看到的混乱程度让打扫房子就像在糖浆中艰难前行一样。

有一段时间，我为她的离开而感到难过。然后我卷起袖子，决定每两周进行一次疯狂的大扫除，由我自己来搞定。我也把孩子们和丈夫拉进来帮忙，不知怎么地，我们挺过来了。

现在房子还算干净，尽管依然像以前一样乱。但至少，唯一因此评判我的人只有我自己。

■ 安娜（ANNA）的名字已做化名处理。

接前页

考虑到我男朋友的行为，我的反应出奇地冷静——更不用说这已经不是第一次发生了。

正因为我之前经历过这种具有攻击性的夜间性关注，所以我知道不必恐慌。因为马特的眼神是迷离的，那不是因为欲望，而是因为睡眠。马特的全科医生认为他表现出了性梦游症（sexomnia）的所有迹象，这是一种睡眠障碍，患者在完全处于睡眠状态时会进行性活动——无论是自慰甚至尝试进行性交。

这是一种睡眠相关异常行为（parasomnia）——即在睡眠期间发生的活动或行为——通常是因为睡眠周期中意识部分与无意识部分之间出现模糊而导致。正如马特的情况一样，患者在第二天醒来时对自己的行为没有任何记忆。

虽然我们大多数人都经历过其他类型的睡眠相关异常行为，例如梦游和梦话，但性梦游症要罕得多——而且更令人不安。

在我开始研究马特日益令人困扰的夜间行为之前，我几乎没听说过这种病症。据估计，人口中只有 1 到 2% 的人会

马特的眼神迷离……带着睡意

在生命中的某个时间点经历过这种情况，且据报道在男性中更为常见。

但近年来，性梦游症（sexomnias）获得了越来越多的关注，因为在强奸案中将其作为辩护理由的男性人数有所增加。去年，一名澳大利亚男子在声称自己发作后，被判定与一名女性发生非自愿性行为的指控不成立。

2024年，一名英国女性成功起诉了英国皇家检察署（CPS）35 万英镑，此前由于两名睡眠专家声称她可能受到了性梦游症的影响，涉嫌强奸她的男子在原定开庭前被宣判无罪。英国皇家检察署向她道歉，并承认该案件不应被撤销。

与性侵犯的关联解释了为什么当我最终告诉马特发生了什么时，他感到如此惊恐。我也一直不敢与最亲密的朋友分享我的经历，担心人们会对产生负面评价。

虽然有些人可能会怀疑他只是在晚上对我耍花招，但我坚信他完全不知道自己在做什么。

讽刺的是，直到我向他坦白他的所作所为之后，我们的关系才接近崩溃点，而此前他在睡眠中试图骚扰我时，情况从未如此严重。

我们两人都三十出头，在金融行业工作，五年前在一次生日聚会上通过共同朋友相识并在一起。由于性欲相近，我们享受着热烈的性生活，并且能毫无问题地在彼此的怀抱中入睡。

然后，两年前，我们决定搬到一起住。在建立新家仅几个月后，马特的夜间习惯开始发生变化。

起初，是一只游走的手抚摸我的乳房，或者在他从背后抱着我时我能感觉到的一次偶然勃起，这种情况每月发生几次。虽然这把我吵醒了，但我将其视为一种赞美——他甚至在睡觉时都迷恋我！所以当这种情况开始频繁发生时，我感到很得意，并没有担心。

但随着时间的推移，勃起开始伴随着抽送动作，且频率增加到每周至少两次。

我会用肘部撞他的肋骨并试图让他翻身，而他则在鼾声中对此毫无反应。

但因为我被惊醒了（大约在凌晨2点），我直到凌晨4点才能重新入睡。

由于睡眠不足，我变得易怒，咖啡摄入量激增。

而且让我不安的不仅仅是缺乏睡眠。虽然我们定期做爱——每周至少一次——但他潜意识状态下的兴奋程度似乎比清醒时更高。

我感到足够不安，以至于向他提到了勃起的事。我紧张地问他，是不是在梦见另一个女人？

马特告诉我，大多数男性在睡觉时都会勃起，并坚持说没有其他情况。

一次快速的谷歌搜索让我放心，这完全正常，是由快速眼动（REM）睡眠周期期间波动的激素水平引起的。

但在接下来的六个月里，抽送动作开始变得更加激进，马特在这样做时开始用腿压住我，在试图爬到我身上时抓着我的肩膀或腰部。

我的肘击变成了为了把他推开而用力地推搡。

他还升级到尝试脱掉我的睡衣，并试图将手强行伸进我的双腿之间，而我全部将其挡回。

我变得越来越担心，但没有说什么，因为不想让他尴尬，也不想在我和他工作压力都很大时给关系添乱。

我明白为什么有些女性可能会感到恐惧，但我从未害怕过。

马特从未以暴力或威胁的方式对我动手，我也从未想过他会这样做。每次我都能轻易地把他推开。

然而，这令人不安——而且非常、非常烦人。

虽然没有直接讨论这个话题，但在一次“事件”后的早晨，我开始问一些尖锐的问题，比如，“你昨晚做奇怪的梦了吗？”以及，“你睡得怎么样？”

重新询问后，他通常说自己睡得很好。但我开始对他变得暴躁，因为我太累了。

约会之夜以争吵收场，家里的一些琐事也会让我愤怒：门口堆成山的鞋子，被留在水槽里发臭的洗碗件。

我觉得自己像是在和一个并不完全了解的人生活在一起，而且完全不知道该如何处理。更不用说那种我觉得自己在对他隐瞒某些事情的感觉，这同样让我感到痛苦。

而在这一切之中，在潜意识里，我担心这一切都是因为他心中有一个比我更中意的人，而那个人激发了他的深夜欲望。

我们清醒时的性生活也开始受到影响，我的睡眠不足以及担心马特（Matt）对我没有吸引力的恐惧，都给这段关系带来了打击。

就这样过了几个月，就在我们准备去度假之前，他半夜的活动似乎有所减轻。

我们出游了，在那里我们俩都睡得像婴儿一样香，我希望马特的古怪行为已经停止了。也许原因是工作压力！他最近刚被晋升，所以这解释得通。

但一旦回到家，他的骚扰再次升级。不过，这并不总是令人反感。在一次浪漫约会之夜后的晚上，我们喝了太多鸡尾酒，摇摇晃晃地回到家，瘫在床上。

因为太累且有些微醺，不适合做爱，我们接吻后立即睡着了。

但在凌晨时分，我醒来发现他正从背后顶我。

我承认，这一次我被激发了欲望。随后他把我翻过来，开始脱掉我们两人的衣服，然后我们做爱了。

“虽然他看起来反应正常，但回想起来，迹象已经出现了——他对我一言不发，而通常会有赞赏或鼓励的声音，而且他的眼神是迷离的。”

他没有射精，我将其归结为鸡尾酒的影响，而且他之后几乎立即又开始打呼噜，这让我很不爽。我起码期待一个拥抱。

第二天早上，当我告诉他我对我们深夜的亲密接触感到惊讶（尽管并非完全不欣赏）时，他对此毫无记忆。

气氛立即变得糟糕。我很沮丧，因为他没有意识到，甚至在精神上没有参与其中，而且我也感到不舒服，仿佛是我利用了他。

我感到极其矛盾；他不记得这件事，但与此同时，他的身体反应就像他知道自己在做什么一样。我开始疏远马特，不再在沙发上依偎，也不再提供除轻吻之外的亲昵，因为在他身边我感到不舒服且困惑。

虽然他没有对此发表评论，但他似乎也变得更忧郁了，并且没有尝试发起亲密行为，所以我怀疑他是否对发生的事情也感到同样矛盾。

然后，大约六周后，我被一种奇怪的声音惊醒。

我惊恐地坐起来倾听，意识到声音来自房间里。

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秘密与生活

图片：GETTY IMAGES 模特摆拍

一种诊断方法。诊断通常涉及一项睡眠研究，患者需要留宿一夜，其脑电波、心率、呼吸、血氧水平和动作都将被监测。伴侣的陈述也会被纳入考虑。

然而，睡眠专家奥利弗·伯纳斯（Oliver Bernath）博士——他在西萨塞克斯郡（West Sussex）的维多利亚女王医院睡眠障碍中心接诊过男性和女性的性梦游症（sexomnia）病例——告诉我，要确定究竟发生了什么仍然很困难。

“这种模棱两可的状态增加了这种病症通常给伴侣带来的压力，”他说。“这些病症在医学上是良性的——与任何脑部疾病无关——但其行为可能会产生问题。”

“这种病症对同床共枕的伴侣产生的影响，可能从厌烦，到被迫分床睡，甚至到强奸指控不等。”

他还说，尽管

“马特开始用腿夹住我，抓着我的肩膀或腰部。我的肘击变成了猛推，试图把他推开——然而他却在熟睡……”

马特蜷缩在我身边，背对着我。当我伸手拍他的肩膀想把他叫醒时，我意识到他正在剧烈地自慰，但看起来完全处于睡眠状态。

然后他停了下来，翻身仰卧，发出了一声巨大的鼾声。

他告诉我 他觉得自己 像个怪胎

我太震惊了；这不再像是可以用对色情梦境的生理反应，甚至是对我的吸引力来解释的事情。看到他看起来完全在睡觉却在做那种事，令人不安。

之后，我清醒地花了好几个小时研究我所见到的现象。

这是我第一次接触到“性梦游”（sexomnia）这个词，包括关于强奸案的新闻报道以及 Reddit 上的第一手经历贴。

我觉得我们已经到了我必须告诉马特发生了什么的地步。第二天早晨他一醒来，我就向他详细说明了过去 18 个月的情况。他感到极其羞愧

且相当痛苦。除了我告诉他关于夜间勃起的情况外，他完全不知道发生了这些事。

马特含泪告诉我，这让他觉得自己像个“强奸犯”，像个“怪胎”。他讨厌自己在睡眠中对自己所做之事毫无意识的想法。

我问他据他所知以前是否发生过这种情况，他说没有。

之前的女朋友从未提及过任何相关事情。

他向我连珠炮般地询问：他是否伤害过我？他在做那些事时说了什么吗？

然后，最令人心碎的是，我是否还想和他在一起？

对此，我由衷地回答了“是的”，并补充说我相信一定有办法可以提供帮助。

马特感到恐惧的部分原因在于，他唯一一次听到这个词是在去年 8 月的一起备受关注的强奸案中，当时暴力歹徒迪恩·法伊纳尔（Dean Final）在强奸两名女性后，试图以患有性梦游为由逃脱法律制裁。

尽管 32 岁的法伊纳尔最终被定罪，但这种关联并没有让马特平静下来。在接下来的几周里，他每天早晨醒来时脸上都带着忧虑的神情，问我他在睡眠中是否又碰了我。

看到他如此焦虑，我心碎不已；而在我确认他没有碰我的早晨，他会松一口气。

但担心自己可能会做出某种行为的恐惧显然深刻地影响着他，他开始完全回避性生活。

结果就是，我觉得被拒绝了，觉得自己没有魅力，而我深爱我的男友则感到尴尬，我们开始吵架。

在没有任何亲密关系的情况下，我担心我们无法维持下去。

一天晚上，我们在沙发上就我们的性生活状态进行了一次坦诚的对话，我解释说我不能这样继续下去——我担心我们要分手了，并且我后悔告诉他关于他夜间活动的事情。马特说他觉得自己被玷污了，并担心如果我们发生了性关系，他可能会在当晚晚些时候做出极端或暴力的行为。

直到最近在康沃尔的一次周末旅行中，在喝了几杯酒、头晕且被晒伤之后，马特才感到足够自信去战胜那个特定的心魔。

此后他去看过了全科医生（GP），目前正在等待转诊至睡眠专家。

性梦游带来了一项挑战，因为虽然它在 2005 年被正式纳入《国际睡眠障碍分类》，但还没有标准化的

这与 性梦 无关

我曾担心马特的梦中在发生什么，但这种活动通常与性性质的梦境无关。

相反，它发生在所谓的非快速眼动（NREM）睡眠的局部觉醒期间，而非我们做梦时所处的更深层的快速眼动（REM）睡眠。

我还不知道是否有“治愈”方法，或者这是否是马特余生都将面对的问题。

伯纳斯博士（Dr Bernath）表示，这种行为可能由生活方式因素触发，包括饮酒过多、压力和睡眠不足，但尚未发现明确的原因，也不清楚为什么它影响某些人而不在其他人身上产生影响。

有趣的是，目前尚未发现这与激素水平或性欲有任何已知联系。对于大多数人来说，这种情况是发作性的，可以通过健康的睡眠习惯来管理，包括在熄灯前不使用电子屏幕以及规律的就寝时间。Bernath 博士表示，治疗还包括放松技巧，除此之外，抗抑郁药等药物也能有所帮助。

Matt 现在正尽最大努力减少饮酒，并养成健康的就寝习惯。

现在，他不再是每周被惊醒几次，而是每隔几个月才发生一次，而且在发生后的第二天早晨，我会对他坦诚地沟通这件事。他对此的焦虑感也减轻了。

或许最重要的是，我们的清醒性生活——以及我们的关系——已经回到了正轨。

■ Jodie Garraway 是化名。姓名和身份细节已做修改。

在我们的 Morning Mail 通讯中 获取更多此类精彩阅读内容

用手机摄像头扫描此二维码即可注册

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秘密与生活

如今，如果你想结识那个特别的人，人们普遍接受约会软件是首选途径。

但专业媒人的角色远未消亡。单身人士对“滑动”文化的肤浅感日益厌倦，希望回归到更具个人色彩的体验中。

我很清楚这一点。在过去的 26 年里，我一直致力于将那些渴望寻找爱情的人们联系在一起。

是的，在很多方面，自约会软件出现以来，这份工作已经发生了变化。我们不再仅仅是向你介绍那些你平时不会遇到的人，而是从爱好到志向，为你精心挑选最合适的人选。

我们还看到一些结束了长期关系或丧偶的人，他们需要指导，因为约会环境已经发生了巨大的演变。

但有些事情永远不会改变。没有什么比两个人在彼此身上找到归属感更美妙的了。我帮助促成了数千次配对，甚至被邀请参加其中一些婚礼。

我的大多数客户都非常讨人喜欢，但遗憾的是，多年来我见证的一些令人震惊的行为——以及离谱的要求——让我意识到，有些人根本不配得到丘比特之箭。

如今人们的要求高得多。软件让他们养成了不利的习惯。不喜欢看到的？那就继续滑动，直到满意为止。这让人们忘记了深入挖掘的重要性。

我们的客户来自专业背景，年龄从 20 多岁一直到 80 多岁。

他们经常指定理想的身高、头发和眼睛颜色。

很多男性还会告诉我们，他们只愿意与 10 码或更小尺寸的人约会。至于女性，大多数希望伴侣身材高挑。

然而，现在女性寻找的关键特质之一是具有情商的男性。他们

一个做了拉皮手术，却不愿与注射过肉毒杆菌的女性约会的男人……

照片：GETTY O'DONNELL BY MORELLE

以及我在26年媒人生涯中遇到的其他傲慢之辈

想要找一个成熟且志同道合，但能尊重她们独立性的人。

虽然过于挑剔意味着我们的匹配对象可能会错过一些很棒的人，但我们仍尽力满足合理的偏好。然而，有些偏好完全是不合理的。

一名50多岁的男性客户说，他只愿意与比他年轻20岁的女性约会——但他不想要更多孩子。

当我们告诉他，这个年龄段的女性会认为他太老了，而且大多数30多岁的女性都在寻找可以一起组建家庭的人时，他要求退款。他没有得到退款。

然后还有一名63岁的男性客户，他做过植发和拉皮手术……却抱怨一名女性告诉他她注射过肉毒杆菌。他说他只喜欢“自然”的女性。在这种情况下，指出这种双重标准是一件令人愉快的事。

但产生问题的不仅仅是男性。

在与一名秃顶男子共度一个夜晚后，一名70多岁的女性客户表示，她只想要头发浓密的约会对象。考虑到她想结识70或80多岁的人，我们不得不指出，我们是媒人——而不是奇迹创造者。

随后，在与另外三名不同的男性约会后，她要求全额退款，因为她想要一个同样热爱园艺的人。

并不是她最近的约会对象不喜欢园艺——他喜欢！——但她说她只喜欢种植水果和蔬菜，而他热爱照料花卉。同样，没有退款。

我们还收到许多要求匹配特定行业从业者的请求。

一名50多岁的女士交给我们的任务是为她寻找一名成功的艺术家。仅仅是对绘画有热情是不够的。

我们不得不告诉她，如果她在这一“必须具备”的条件上不让步，她将缩小自己获得浪漫成功的机会。

最终，我们为她找到了一位（非艺术家的）男士，事实证明他是完美的匹配。

这表明在现实中，我们大多数人最终会爱上一个完全出乎意料的人。

我明白，当你花钱时，期望值会很高。我们的会员费在六个月内介于1,000 英镑和3,000 英镑之间，需预付。为此，我们每月发送三个精心挑选的匹配对象。

如果针对潜在匹配对象提出的问题微不足道，我们会鼓励客户保持开放心态。

有些人会在温和的反馈下改变主意——但也有一些人我们不得不终止其会员资格。

有报道称，一些男性在第一次约会时就过于轻佻。有些人厌女。他们在我们的名册中没有位置。

虽然我们从未需要向警方举报任何人，但如果有人表现得特别令人反感，我们会告知其他媒人予以留意。

我绝不是唯一拥有几个恐怖故事的媒人。

另一位媒人曾告诉我，她为一名30多岁的女性客户安排了第二次约会。

在男子未能抵达餐厅后，客户接到了警方的电话，告知他发生了交通事故并正在住院。警方给她打电话是因为她是他在电话中联系的最后一个人。

第二天，她给媒人打电话，对警方的干扰感到愤怒。

难怪我们经常想尖叫“别怪媒人！”但为了真爱，我们将保持冷静并继续前行。

■ Lorraine Adams 是 Gorgeous Networks 的集团首席执行官，该公司经营多家相亲机构

由 MARYLOU COSTA 记录

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分享那些让我对自己感到糟糕的事情，好让你们感觉好一些

@bryonygordon

BRYONY GORDON

我曾经迷恋布拉德·皮特……而现在他只是个有酗酒问题的可怜老头

作为一个有心跳的中年女性，我很少在看向布拉德·皮特时感到一种巨大的失望感。

但本周，当我读到皮特接受《时尚先生》（Esquire）杂志的采访时，我产生了一种奇妙的感觉。他在采访中透露，在戒酒七年后，他又开始喝酒了。

“我重新回到了饮酒的状态，”他告诉该杂志，“是以一种更克制的方式。我有几次过于自信了，心想：‘没问题’，结果——不行，这对我没好处。不过量并不多。”

随后，记者向一个因与酒精关系恶劣而戒酒的人提出了一个最危险的问题：你现在能喝一杯葡萄酒吗？

哦，当然，如果你是那种能从瓶子里倒出少量桃红葡萄酒，然后将其放回冰箱门上直到一周结束的人，这看起来可能完全无害。但皮特显然不是这样的人，他承认自己参加过匿名戒酒会（Alcoholics Anonymous）。他在2016年年底与安吉丽娜·朱莉离婚后促使他戒掉了酒精。

皮特根据自己的承认，是一个问题饮酒者。而询问一个问题饮酒者是否能偶尔喝杯葡萄酒，有点像询问一个对坚果过敏的人是否能偶尔用一块Blackers巧克力棒犒劳自己。

但为了公平对待采访者，皮特似乎也误解了清醒（sobriety）和酒精中毒的本质。“嗯，我可以喝几杯（葡萄酒），”他告诉采访者，“但我不能喝很多，我必须对此保持专业。”

就在这几句妄想的话语中，我从迷恋布拉德·皮特变成了可怜他。因为根据我的经验，一旦成为酒精中毒者，就永远是酒精中毒者。能够长时间禁酒并不证明你能负责任地饮酒——

或者像皮特所说的“专业地”饮酒——这只证明了你不能喝酒。而皮特在说这些话时，是在进行他职业生涯中最糟糕的表演。

也许是我太刻薄了。也许皮特真的完成了几乎不可能的任务，在发现情况糟糕到不得不取消自己的“饮酒特权”（他自己的原话）之后，教会了自己如何节制酒精摄入。

但在我清醒的九年里，我还没有见过任何人能成功做到这一点。

然而，我见过很多复饮的人，他们试图说服自己（以及周围的所有人）他们已经掌控了局面。但如果他们非常幸运的话，通常会垂头丧气地重新回到清醒状态。许多人再也回不来了，在酒精带来的痛苦和肮脏中度过余生。

这就是为什么我对62岁的皮特的公开声明感到如此失望。因为在他的灵魂深处，他一定知道，在这样一个否认和妄想不仅可怜，而且在许多情况下可能是致命的群体中，这样的声明是多么没有帮助。

我认识太多在尝试像正常人一样喝酒而失去一切的酒精中毒者。我想，既然皮特参加过几次匿名戒酒会，他一定遇到过这些人。

当围绝经期遇上怀孕……

这个世界太不习惯看到女性真实的身体，以至于当安妮·海瑟薇展示她的孕肚时，社交媒体上开始传言那是假的。我个人非常喜欢这位 43 岁的女演员将她那“高龄”怀孕的状态公之于众。显然，她根本不在乎任何人的看法——而这正是围绝经期遇上怀孕时你所能预见的反应！

同样。他现在向这个已经误解了成瘾和酗酒的世界传递什么样的信息？

当我处于积极成瘾状态时，我会看到葡萄酒瓶背面的那些“理性饮酒”标志，并思考我到底出了什么问题。当然，我是一个酗酒者，但与这个词相关的耻辱感如此之强，以至于我竭尽全力地证明它不适用于我。直到经历了一系列日益危险的麻烦之后，我才意识到，简单地接受自己是一个酗酒者会容易得多——而且到目前为止我还能活着已经很幸运了。

当你最终面对自己的酗酒问题时，你会学到的一件事是：滴酒不沾实际上比尝试只喝一两杯要容易得多。酒精让我像圣诞树一样兴奋；一旦我开始喝，我就停不下来。在我们所有

到了你退出社交媒体的时候了，简

简·利明（Jan Leeming）在批评 ITV 新闻的查琳·怀特（Charlene White）的主持技巧后，再次陷入了麻烦。利明（如图）在 X 上写道：“她的风格如此傲慢，”显然地没有带任何讽刺意味。

她的这些言论发表在几个月前她利用该社交媒体网站抱怨餐厅允许儿童进入之后。事实上，她似乎大部分上网时间都在抱怨。由于在发表关于查琳的评论后受到了“恶毒的辱骂”，她现在已经退出了 X 几天。也许应该永远离开那里，简。正如那句古老的格言所说：如果你没有什么好话可以说，那就什么都不要说。

我很喜欢在康沃尔与朋友度假时观看日食，那里的覆盖率几乎达到了 95%。我们成年人被迷住了，孩子们则没那么感兴趣——他们抱怨时间太长，而且看起来没有他们在 YouTube 上看到的片段那么好看。真是的：现在的年轻人！

为什么我庆幸自己从未尝试过电子烟

安吉拉·雷纳（Angela Rayner）在发起对电子烟商店的打击行动时，承认自己无法戒掉电子烟。我很高兴自己是直接戒掉了香烟，而不是转向电子烟。每当我看到有人吸着一块亮粉色的塑料时，我意识到自己险些用一个糟糕的习惯换成了另一个更令人上瘾——更不用说令人尴尬——的习惯。

在康复过程中，我们会学到：对于我们来说，一杯就太多，一千杯也永远不够。这就是为什么我不相信皮特在《Esquire》采访中说的任何一个字。

在两人分手后，安吉林娜·朱莉提起诉讼，声称皮特在私人飞机上将酒精泼在她和他们的孩子身上。尽管这位演员极力否认这些指控，但据说他们的六个孩子中没有一个现在与皮特说话，其中几个人最近申请在法律上删除其姓氏。

报道称，朱莉对前夫再次饮酒“并不感到惊讶”，突然间你意识到这并非某种肤浅的戏剧，而是一个涉及孩子且相当悲剧的情况。

去掉好莱坞的光环和杂志封面，事实是布拉德·皮特其实没什么特别的。他只是一个陷入复饮状态的、可悲的老男人。

难怪康沃尔郡讨厌所有这些游客

读到那对夫妇在一家康沃尔郡露营地冲破安全护栏，造成近 5,000 英镑 损失的消息时，我并不感到惊讶。

这对夫妇试图在凌晨2点开着他们的大众面包车离开，去附近的一个节日活动中接他们的青少年孩子，尽管露营地的规定明确指出，为了确保露营者的安全，住宿区将在午夜前被锁上。

遗憾的是，这种自以为是的行为在这里已是常态。在过去的几天里，我看到有家庭在海滩上大声播放音乐并举行大型烧烤，还有人拒绝清理爱犬的排泄物。难怪当地人厌倦了游客。

---

秘密与生活

我们都热爱“快速见效”这个概念。因此，当我们的 Instagram 动态开始承诺，只需几个简单的步骤，你就能免费改善不良体态、消除挥之不去的疼痛，甚至变得更有吸引力时，我们的注意力就被吸引了。

秘诀是什么？是你的筋膜（fascia）——身体的一个部分，在我们将其视为最新的健康流行词之前，大多数人都不知道它的存在。无论你有什么问题，看来“筋膜重置”就是答案。

有些帖子甚至展示了前后对比图，显示由于我们频繁使用笔记本电脑和手机而导致许多人出现的颈后驼峰，可以通过处理筋膜来消除。

但筋膜到底是什么？你应该如何修复它？这样做真的能治愈从中年僵硬到长期积压的创伤等所有问题吗？

筋膜是一种薄的结缔组织，它包裹着肌肉，并将肌肉与骨骼、腱和韧带连接起来。

“把它想象成一个连续的三维网络，主要由蛋白质胶原组成，包裹并连接着你体内的几乎所有东西，”特许物理治疗师、 《如何成为你自己的物理治疗师》（How To Be Your Own Physio）一书的作者尼尔·米德（Neil Mead）解释道。

“筋膜赋予身体结构，让肌肉能够平滑地相互滑动，并帮助分散力量，这样当你身体的一个部分移动时，负荷会分布在整个系统中，而不是停留在某一个点上。”

根据米德的说法，过去二十年里，人们对筋膜重要性的看法发生了变化。

“我们了解到，筋膜不仅仅是填充材料，而且是人体中最丰富的感觉组织之一，”她说道。

“据估计，筋膜网络可能包含多达 2.5 亿 个神经末梢，这就是为什么任何肌肉或筋膜问题都会引起如此剧烈的疼痛。”

例如，当你拉伤肌肉时，剧烈的疼痛是由周围筋膜中的感觉神经引起的。

但虽然我们都能理解这类损伤，但看到那些称你的筋膜“位置不对”或“脱水”导致你出现问题的帖子，则没那么清晰了。

那么，你的筋膜会出什么问题，又是为什么？

米德解释说，当筋膜的流动性降低时就会出现问题，这通常是由于久坐不动的生活方式造成的。

“本应相互滑动的层级开始出现轻微的粘连，”她说道。“这种情况往往发生在受伤、手术或某个特定区域长期不活动之后。它可能会增厚，或变得更加敏感，而且有证据表明，长期压力也会逐渐使组织僵硬。”

然而，这并不意味着筋膜像社交媒体让你相信的那样，要为这么多疾病负责。

米德说：“认为这一个因素就是导致你颈后驼峰、僵硬和酸痛的原因，这一观点根本没有得到证实。是的，这种组织可能是酸痛、僵硬的来源—。

修复“缺水”的筋膜真的能治愈所有小疼痛吗？

作者：克莱尔·科尔曼 (CLAIRE COLEMAN)

感以及一种受限感。但这是因为筋膜分布着极其丰富的神经末梢。

“当一个人感到酸痛或僵硬时，通常很难——即使是对临床医生来说——去判定其中有多少来自肌肉，多少来自关节，多少来自神经，以及多少来自筋膜。”

同样，她说，如果你的姿势不良，某个区域的筋膜可能会增厚，“但它是乘客而非司机”。

因此，一名合格的物理治疗师绝不会试图通过孤立地观察你的筋膜来治疗问题。

话虽如此，并非所有关于“重置”筋膜益处的建议都是虚假的。只不过它可能不像人们暗示的那样简单。

例如，如果社交媒体上的帖子警告你的筋膜“脱水”并需要特定的动作来解决——通常是一系列练习或拉伸，类似于瑜伽中的太阳礼拜式——他们实际上是将筋膜与淋巴排毒不良混为一谈了。

米德（Mead）解释说，虽然这类动作能让你感觉好转，但你这样做并不是在专门针对筋膜。

“运动确实有助于身体内部液体的流动，”她说。“与由心脏驱动的血液不同，你的淋巴系统[用于帮助排出废物]没有中央泵。它依赖于肌肉的挤压、你的呼吸以及附近动脉的搏动来推动液体和淋巴液流动。”

“所以，当你花十分钟进行温和、正念的运动时，你确实在帮助液体排出和循环，这能让你感觉没那么迟钝，看起来没那么浮肿。”

“筋膜对多样化、规律性的负荷反应良好；让关节经历完整的活动范围、拉伸、阻力训练，以及在多个方向上移动，而不是重复同样的几个方向。”

但米德补充道：“那些为了‘筋膜放松’而销售的工具（泡沫轴、按摩球或一套按压和滚动方案）与我们多年来用于肌肉训练的工具是一样的。”

“关于存在一个独立的、特殊的‘筋膜训练’类别，能够触及普通拉伸和滚动无法触及的组织的说法，并没有充分的证据支持。”

“你并没有在物理上重塑你的筋膜，你是在降低神经系统保护性紧张的‘音量’，从而暂时地使身体放松。这确实有用。”

“但这并不是一种治愈方法，除非你随后进行力量训练并养成更好的运动习惯，否则效果不会持久。”

简而言之，一套筋膜训练方案无法消除你的颈后驼峰或严重的持续疼痛。

但如果你希望增加活动量，感觉更有活力且没那么臃肿，那么你可能会看到一些益处——至少在短期内是这样。

■ 欲了解更多信息，请访问 hoxtobe yourownphysio.com

我耐心地坐着，等待发型和妆容的最后修饰。一名微笑的伴娘将一杯起泡酒递到我手中，一件华丽的白色礼服挂在角落里。

“这本该是我一生中最幸福的一天，是我花了 18 个月精心规划的一天。虽然今天的婚礼庆祝活动仍将举行，但不会有仪式——因为新郎失踪了。”

就在我们原定誓言终身的前七天，与我交往了六年半的伴侣亚历克斯（Alex）坐在我们的厨房里，平静地说：“我只是觉得我们不应该结婚。”

想起这八个令人心碎的字眼，我的眼中充满了泪水。但我知道，大多数在婚礼前几天被抛弃的女性会因为极度的羞辱和心碎而躲起来，但我拒绝成为其中之一。我今天可能不会结婚，但仍然会有一场派对，配备婚纱、伴娘以及对新娘的祝酒。这依然将是我的大日子。

2020年，在我30岁时，我在网上认识了亚历克斯（Alex），当时我并不急于寻找那个“命中注定的人”。我曾看到朋友们随着年岁增长而陷入恐慌，最终委身于那些根本配不上她们的男人。我绝不会让自己陷入那种境地。

但我几乎立刻就与31岁的亚历克斯产生了共鸣。他英俊且有抱负，同样是一名企业主，而且他身上有一种沉稳，能中和掉我那较为狂躁的能量。几个月内我们便坠入爱河，一年后搬到一起居住。

我的家人和朋友都很喜欢亚历克斯，尤其是我的母亲，她非常喜欢他经常顺道过来帮她处理家里的各种琐事。我和母亲以及两个姐姐的关系非常亲密，所以她们的意见对我至关重要。

接下来的四年里我们过得很幸福。我们一起旅行，并在利物浦买了一栋三居室的独立屋。我很喜欢这种共同扎根的感觉。

我知道亚历克斯希望有一天能有个孩子，虽然我从未感觉到生物钟在催促，但我绝对对此持开放态度。然后，在2024年，我在一场商业骗局中损失了5 万英镑。我崩溃了，在我为了重建事业而没日没夜地工作时，我感受到了我们关系中出现的第一道裂痕。

我一直以来都是那个积极乐观的人，帮助亚历克斯度过生活中的坎坷

“我拒绝在我的大日子里躲起来”

他的生活。现在轮到我变得脆弱了，而当我与无休止的压力搏斗时，他却陷入了挣扎。就好像如果我不再担任我们两人的啦啦队长，我们的关系就无法维持一样。

但我将这些想法抛之脑后，将我所有能投入的精力都集中在解决我业务中的问题上，并相信一旦这些问题过去，亚历克斯（Alex）和我将变回以前那样幸福的一对。

2024年除夕，在泰国的一个海滩上，亚历克斯向我求婚。那是一个美好的时刻，我毫不犹豫地答应了。

我们都热爱意大利，而且因为我的公司 Think! Wine Group（该公司从意大利进口我的葡萄酒），我在那里花费了很多时间，所以我们决定在那里举行婚礼。

我们度过了一段美妙的时光：参观场地，品尝美食，凝视绝美的风景，并想象着宣读誓言的情景。那是如此浪漫，我从未感到与亚历克斯如此心意相通。

有一个令人惊叹的场地，我们两人瞬间就爱上了那里。

它坐落在托斯卡纳的山丘上，有一个用于举行仪式的教堂，场地内包含一个泳池，且有足够的空间容纳全部 50 位宾客入住。对于我构思的为期三天的活动来说，这里是完美之选，计划包括一场欢迎晚餐、婚礼当天的盛宴以及次日的泳池派对。

回到家中后，我主导了筹备工作。我

作者：凯瑟琳·琼斯 (KATHERINE JONES)

我热爱规划这些事情，事实证明，这成了缓解工作压力的一种很好的分心方式。

但当我们一起挑选西装和戒指时，在我选择鲜花、表演者和装饰时，亚历克斯却没表现出任何兴趣。

随着月份的流逝，我确实感到一阵恼怒，他难道不应该有自己的意见吗？但转念一想，我告诉自己，很多男人都会把这一切交给准新娘，而且他工作也很忙。

我最喜欢的部分是去年十月和我的母亲、姐妹们以及姨妈一起挑选婚纱。在试过了似乎有无数件选项之后，我穿着一件2,000 英镑的长袖蕾丝礼服走出试衣间，看到我的姨妈开始落泪。我觉得自己脱胎换骨了。

遗憾的是，即使是那样的兴奋也无法掩盖我正陷入挣扎的事实——而亚历克斯并没有挺身而出。我热爱我的工作，但在十二月，经过三个月的工作压力让我经常处于崩溃边缘，我再也无法掩饰了。

“亚历克斯，我觉得很孤独，”我说，“而你没有支持我。到底怎么回事？”“我觉得我们一直相处得不好，”他轻声回答，“我对我们之间现在的状态很不满意。”

我内心的一部分对亚历克斯终于告诉我他的感受感到宽慰，但听到他确认存在问题时，我也感到惊恐。“我的天，我们七个月后就要结婚了，”我回答道。

“我知道，”他说，显然很心烦。“我们需要花时间在一起，真正地经营我们的关系。”

这正是我们所做的。我们进行了长时间的谈话，一起骑车，单纯地享受彼此的陪伴。我们感到比以往任何时候都更亲近，我的恐惧消散了。我迫不及待地想成为夫妻。

到今年五月，我们最初的2 万英镑预算已成为遥远的回忆。包括我在西班牙的单身派对，总支出超过了3 万英镑——一半由我的父母支付，另一半由我们支付。我告诉自己，这一切都是值得的。

随后，亚历克斯在七月初从他在苏格兰的单身派对回来，我感觉到有些东西改变了。他再次变得疏远，不愿交谈，且不再那么亲昵。我将其归结为紧张：婚礼只有几周时间了，我知道对于害羞的人来说，成为关注的中心可能会很困难。

婚礼前两周，我去参加了一个住宿制的训练营，旨在在大日子之前减掉最后的几磅体重。我们亲吻告别，他发短信说他爱我。

然后，四天后，我回到家中，对他冷漠且疏远的方式感到震惊。没有接吻或拥抱迎接，没有想念我的话语。亚历克斯只是接过我的行李，宣布他累了，然后就去睡觉了。

我惊呆了，在他拒绝告诉我出了什么问题时，愤怒在心中升起。当我醒来时，他已经离开了

---

秘密与猜测

花卉，西蒙娜·塞布·斯特劳德 (SIMONE THERB STROUD)

被爱包围：凯瑟琳与她的母亲和姐妹们在托斯卡纳

我的未婚夫在婚礼前一周抛弃了我

……所以我独自在意大利举行了为期三天的婚礼——然后和我的母亲一起去了蜜月旅行！

第二天早晨，我花了一整天时间在焦虑中度过。但我提醒自己，他以前在压力大的时候偶尔也会这样，而且最后都没事。他回家后肯定会对我敞开心扉的。

然而，我胃里那种糟糕的感觉挥之不去。

晚上9点，亚历克斯终于回来了，表情依然阴沉。“怎么了？”我说，听到自己的声音在颤抖，“我有权知道。”

最后，他坐在厨房桌旁，拒绝与我对视，轻声说道：“我只是觉得我们不应该结婚。”

我真的觉得自己快要吐了，在开始哭泣时，恶心感与心碎感交织在一起。“但我们下周就要结婚了，”我勉强说道，而他依然拒绝看我。终于，愤怒如洪水般爆发。“你为什么不早点告诉我？”我愤怒地质问，声音因狂怒而提高，“你怎么敢让我经历这一切。”

为了拼命掌控这场噩梦，我向他抛出一个接一个的问题，但他唯一的回答是他从12月起就不开心了。

我考虑了一会儿是否要哀求他，我知道如果我尝试，我可以改变他的主意。但我也知道，我永远不会忘记他那天晚上说的话——而且我永远无法嫁给一个能对我做出这种事的男人。尽管情绪起伏不定，但我确定了一件事。无论有没有新郎，我都要去意大利。场地已经全额付款，客人们也都订好了机票。我们的定金一分钱也拿不回来。所以这次活动必须举行，无论他是否参加。

在经历了一个不安的夜晚后，我开车前往婚纱店进行最后一次试穿，一路上抽泣不止。看着自己穿着那件几个月前让我感到如此美丽的礼服，简直令我无法忍受。

之后，我见到了我的母亲和姐姐。我含泪告诉她们，我决定继续举办派对，但我只希望我的30位亲友在场，因为我无法面对看到亚历克斯的宾客而带来的关于他的回忆。如果她们觉得我疯了，也没有表现出来，反而告诉我这是一个绝妙的主意。

随着她们迅速采取行动，一切都变得模糊了。她们给所有宾客打电话，包括亚历克斯的家人和朋友，这样我就不必听到他们的反应。

时间在葡萄酒的陪伴下缓慢流逝。母亲白天陪着我，朋友们晚上过来。她们告诉我，她们一直觉得亚历克斯配不上我。她们在撒谎吗？我不知道，但我非常感激她们的爱与支持。

因为无法忍受亚历克斯留在屋里，他搬到了我们改造的车库中。我再次与他对质，骂他是懦夫，而他则没完没了地道歉。

但我意识到这对我没有任何帮助。我精疲力竭，心碎且愤怒，但我还有一个婚礼之日要面对。

我知道自己无法面对去领取主婚纱，尽管那很贵。但我收拾了原计划在仪式后换上的第二件更休闲的礼服，以及我的白色派对连体裤、为婚礼早晨购买的晨袍和泳池派对用的白色泳衣。

“不能因为他而让这一切白费，”我激烈地想，“我依然可以穿白色。”

但我摘掉了订婚戒指；我绝不可能再戴它一分钟。

我的逞强一直持续到7月29日抵达场地，在那里我崩溃了。尽管在流泪，但望着完美的托斯卡纳景色，我告诉自己：“我宁愿在这里，也不愿在家里躺在床上抽泣。我要充分利用每一分钟。”

于是，我拥抱了我了不起的朋友和家人，并请求他们：“请不要跟我谈论发生的事情。只要尽力让我笑起来就好。”他们确实做到了。三天时间里，我们饮食。

“尽你所能让我开心”

我们喝酒跳舞。从美味的欢迎餐，到招待会上动人的演讲和祝酒，再到精彩的泳池派对，一切都完全按照我的计划进行——除了仪式和新郎。

最艰难的时刻是活动结束、众人离去之时。我哭了一整天，心中交织着悲伤与解脱。随后，我擦干眼泪，开始了本该是我的阿马尔菲海岸蜜月之旅——只不过陪伴在我身边的是我的母亲，而不是我的丈夫。

我知道家乡的人们会议论发生的事，但我拒绝为被抛弃而感到羞耻。我没有做错任何事，为什么要躲起来？

为了正面应对这些流言蜚语，我决定发布一段关于这件事的 TikTok 视频。

我原以为只有认识我的人会看到，但反响之大令我惊讶。在短短几小时内，我的粉丝数就达到了数千人，信息开始纷至沓来。许多女性告诉我她们也曾被抛弃，并为此承受了巨大的羞耻感，她们很高兴我能公开谈论这件事。

在五天之内，我的粉丝数超过了 75,000 人。我很高兴我的经历能引起这么多女性的共鸣，并希望能够激励其他被抛弃的人重新夺回她们的婚礼体验。

我真的不知道接下来的几个月会发生什么，亚历克斯和我将如何理清彼此的生活，以及 36 岁开始新篇章会是什么样子。

但我非常庆幸我们没有结婚。这场单身婚礼向我证明，我有足够强大的内心独自面对任何事情。

■ 亚历克斯（ALEX）的名字已做更改。请在 TikTok 上关注 Katherine，账号为 @kathjay49

口述给 KATE GRAHAM

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周五到了！音乐

这些英国人或许避讳聚光灯，但他们的灵魂音乐却令人心醉

作者：Adrian Thrills

JUNGLE：《Sunshine (Calola)》

结论：梦幻的夏季之声 ★★★★☆

在英国音乐奖（BRITs）被加冕为全国最佳乐队的名单中，汇集了经典摇滚和流行乐的各路名家。从披头士（The Beatles）到绿洲乐队（Oasis），从海峡之滨（Dire Straits）到Little Mix，名单上的家喻户晓之名不胜枚举。而本土灵魂乐组合Jungle则在2024年击败了此前的获奖者Blur乐队夺冠。

该组合由儿时好友Josh Lloyd-Watson（又名J Lloyd）和Tom McFarland于2013年在伦敦组建。他们是一群相对低调的人，走在任何一条商业街上都不会被认出来。他们更倾向于让音乐说话，避讳聚光灯，且不在专辑封面上放置照片。

这种情况在他们2024年出人意料地获胜后开始发生改变，并且随着第五张专辑《Sunshine》的推出，这种趋势肯定会加快。长期合作者Lydia Kitto自2021年起与Jungle合作，现在已成为正式成员。她在BRITs颁奖礼上与组合共同亮相时光彩夺目，为乐队带来了情感的分量和真正的视觉焦点。

除此之外，这三人组打造了一张为我们这似乎永无止境的夏天量身定制的专辑。依托于奢华的和声、键盘和吉他，《Sunshine》是灵魂乐、迪斯科、说唱和巴西波萨诺瓦（bossa nova）的梦幻融合。其乐观主义中带着一丝忧郁，但始终蕴含着对美好未来的希望。

在开篇曲《Come Back To Me》中，你听到的第一个声音就是Kitto的。这首歌是一首充满灵魂感且节奏轻快的序曲，讲述了陷入爱河的女主唱在思考一段萌芽中的恋情时，感到眩晕却又在反思。“我一直梦想着与你共度一生，”她唱道，“在来到你身边之前，我不想醒来。”同名主打曲唤起人们对温暖城市公园的记忆，随后我们在《The Wave》中抵达海滩，这是一首带有巴西风味的歌曲，即便早先的恋情在消逝，其撩人的拉丁律动也将我们带到了里约。 “当一切分崩离析时，请不要说它已经结束，”Lydia唱道，“你知道只要我们坚持下去，一切都会变得容易。”

滑棒吉他在《Where Are You Now?》中增添了夏威夷风情，Lloyd和McFarland则负责假声演唱，而《Someday, Somewhere》则是一次向迪斯科的尝试。法国说唱歌手Bas在《Romeo II》中贡献了犀利的演绎，该曲是2021年专辑《Loving In Stereo》中《Romeo》的续作，Bas此前也参与了该曲的录制。

除此之外，Lydia占据了中心舞台——纯净的嗓音，是自动调音（Auto-Tuned）流行乐的解药。冷峻且内敛，《Sunshine》展现了Jungle日益增长的自信。Jungle将于11月21日在利兹的First Direct Bank Arena开启英国巡演（ticketmaster.co.uk）。

MUSIC2YOU 荣幸呈献

这个新合集包含了 66 首 60 年代和 70 年代最热门的金曲，由格伦·坎贝尔（Glen Campbell）备受赞誉的热门单曲《Wichita Lineman》开篇，以及来自芝加哥乐队（Chicago）、沃克兄弟（The Walker Brothers）和鲍比·根特里（Bobbie Gentry）的榜单冠军歌曲。我们还收录了哈里·尼尔森（Harry Nilsson）的《Everybody's Talkin》、卡普顿与特尼尔（Captain & Tennille）的《Love Will Keep Us Together》，以及一些进入录音室的最顶尖女声，包括达斯蒂·斯普林菲尔德（Dusty Springfield）、雪莉·巴塞利（Shirley Bassey）、妈妈卡斯（Mama Cass）和迪翁·沃里克（Dionne Warwick）。第二碟以 Commodores 乐队的《Easy》开始。

• 1 第一碟
• 1 Glen Campbell – Wichita Lineman
• 2 Harry Nilsson – Everybody's Talkin'
• 3 Bread – Make It with You
• 4 Chicago – If You Leave Me Now
• 5 20cc – The Things We Do for Love
• 6 Alessi Brothers – Oh Lori
• 7 Andrew Gold – Never Let You Slip Away
• 8 Captain & Tennille – Love Will Keep Us Together
• 9 Helen Reddy – Angie Baby
• 10 Dusty Springfield – The Windmills of Your Mind
• 11 Judy Collins – Send in the Clowns
• 12 Rita Coolidge – We're All Alone
• 13 Elke Brooks – Don't Cry Out Loud
• 14 Gladys Knight & The Pops – Try to Remember/The Way We Were
• 15 Shirley Bassey – Something
• 16 Andy Williams – (Where Do I Begin) Love Story
• 17 Mama Cass – Dream a Little Dream of Me

• 18 The Walker Brothers – Make It Easy on Yourself

• 19 Jackie DeShannon – What the World Needs Now is Love

• 20 Bobbie Gentry – I'll Never Fall in Love Again
• 21 Dionne Warwick – This Girl's in Love with You
• 22 Acker Bills – Stranger on the Shore
• 23 第二碟
• 1 Commodores – Easy
• 2 Rose Royce – Love Don't Live Here Anymore
• 3 The Three Degrees – Woman in Love
• 4 Aretha Franklin – Until You Come Back to Me (That's What I'm Gonna Do)
• 5 Cilla Black – Anyone Who Had a Heart
• 6 Lesley Gore – Misty
• 7 Engelbert Humperdinck – The Last Waltz
• 8 Al Martino – Spanish Eyes
• 9 Matt Monro – Born Free
• 10 Tony Bennett – The Good Life
• 11 Jack Jones – Wives and Lovers
• 12 The Johnny Mann Singers – Up Up and Away

以及来自 Rose Royce 的《Love Don't Live Here Anymore》，还有来自 Three Degrees、The New Seekers、艾瑞莎·富兰克林（Aretha Franklin）、西拉·布莱克（Cilla Black）和马特·蒙罗（Matt Monro）的热门歌曲，外加托尼·班奈特（Tony Bennett）演唱的《The Good Life》。

第三碟以《A Summer Place》的主题曲开始，随后是来自克里斯托·盖尔（Crystal Gayle）、巴里·马尼洛（Barry Manilow）和汤姆·琼斯（Tom Jones）的热门歌曲，以及德米斯·鲁索斯（Demis Roussos）的冠军单曲《Forever and Ever》，还有来自布鲁克·本顿（Brook Benton）和丹尼·威廉姆斯（Danny Williams）的灵魂乐情歌……以及由查尔斯·阿兹纳夫尔（Charles Aznavour）演绎的真正震撼的《She》。

• 13 Christie – Yellow River
• 14 The New Seekers – I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing (In Perfect Harmony)
• 15 Dawn & Tony Orlando – Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Ole Oak Tree
• 16 Carole Bayer Sager – You're Moving out Today
• 17 Peter Shelley – Love Me, Love My Dog
• 18 Dana – Please Tell Him That I Said Hello
• 19 Jacky – White Horses
• 20 Sammy Davis Jr. – The Candy Man
• 21 George Baker Selection – Pyloma Blanco
• 22 Scott Fitzgerald & Yvonne Keely – (I Had More)
• 23 第三碟
• 1 Percy Faith & His Orchestra – Theme from 'A Summer Place'
• 2 Bobby Goldshorn – Honey
• 3 Charlie Rich – The Most Beautiful Girl
• 4 Crystal Gayle – Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Rise

• 5 Eric Carmen – All By Myself

• 6 Barry Manilow – 'Pyin' to Get the Feeling Again

• 7 Tom Jones – She's A Lady
• 8 Demis Roussos – Forever & Ever
• 9 Ben E. King – Spanish Harlem
• 10 Johnny Mathis & Ray Conniff & His Orchestra & Chorus – Wonderful Wonderful
• 11 Doris Day – Move Over Darling
• 12 Netty Lester – Love Letters
• 13 Mary Mason – Angel of the Morning/ Any Way That You Want Me
• 14 Liverpool Express – Every Man Must Have A Dream
• 15 Neil Sedake – Laughter in the Rain
• 16 Frankie Valli – My Eyes Adored You
• 17 George Benson – The Greatest Love of All
• 18 Brook Benton – Rainy Night in Georgia
• 19 Danny Williams – Moon River
• 20 Perry Como – And I Love You So
• 21 Charles Aznavour – (You/You Les Shuges De L'amour)
• 22 James Galway – Annie's Song

读者可以通过访问 music2you.co.uk / easy 订购这套精彩的 66 首曲目三碟精选集，价格仅为 £9.99（含邮费），无论是自用还是作为礼物送给朋友或爱人都非常合适。如需查看我们所有热门 CD、DVD、有声书和书籍的完整系列，请访问 music2you.co.uk

MUSIC2YOU

立即购买：music2you.co.uk / easy

最新发行最佳推荐...

在《Role Model》中，新英格兰歌手塔克·皮尔斯伯里（Tucker Pillsbury）扮演了倒霉的查克（Chuck）这一第二身份。

ROLE MODEL：《Chuck Timely & The Hourglass》（Interscope 唱片）。在为我们带来了一部关于自我的作品后，Timely 在这张充满陈旧美式风情的概念专辑中再次发力。他是一位极具感染力的作者，在《High Hopes 3000》中唱出了洛杉矶单身人士的艰辛，随后在《Song Is All You Get》中寻求酒吧的慰藉。女友达科塔·约翰逊（Dakota Johnson）在民谣《Love I You》中客串。 ★★★★☆

作为鲍比·沃马克（Bobby Womack）以及塞西尔和琳达（Womack & Womack 组合）之女的侄女，这对姐妹拥有无可挑剔的灵魂乐资历，并以精湛的技巧传承火种。她们借鉴了经典 R&B 和 20 世纪 60 年代纽约女子组合的风格，音乐以和谐的合唱为核心。《Chauffeur》回忆了她们担任 Uber 司机的日子。《My Sisters And Me》则探索了她们的福音音乐根源。 ★★★☆☆ AT

小号几乎像是自己在演奏。Thing Helseth 和在彼得·波佩尔卡（Petr Popelka）指挥下的卑尔根爱乐乐团，为我们带来了亚历山大·阿鲁塔尼安（Alexander Aruthanian）1950 年的《小号协奏曲》以及出色的《主题与变奏》。克日什托夫·潘德列茨基（Krzysztof Penderecki）和米耶奇斯拉夫·温伯格（Mieczysław Weinberg）充满活力的协奏曲为小号爱好者们带来了一个诱人的节目单。 ★★★★☆ TULLY POTTER

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今天是周五！电影

作者：布莱恩·维纳（Brian Viner）

《橡树街之终结》（The End Of Oak Street）（12A 级，99 分钟）

结论：与侏罗纪相关 ★★★☆☆

《托尼》（Tony）（15 级，106 分钟）

结论：略显欠火候 ★★★☆☆

任何抱着观看一部科幻生存惊悚片（正如其宣传的那样）而去看《橡树街之终结》的人，都面临着极大的失望离场的风险。

然而，如果你将其视为一部喜剧，你可能会感到满意。这部电影经常地——且并非总是刻意地——令人捧腹。

这个坦白说极其荒诞的故事发生在 1982 年，背景设定在史蒂文·斯皮尔伯格在《E.T.》（巧合地，或者也许并非巧合，该片同样发行于... 1982 年）中所使用的那种省级郊区。

安妮·海瑟薇（Anne Hathaway）和尤文·麦格雷戈（Ewan McGregor）饰演丹尼斯（Denise）和格雷格·普拉特（Greg Platt），他们的婚姻正处于崩溃边缘。在他们橡树街住宅的地下室里，丹尼斯在秘密写一部小说，将她对那个有些能力不足的丈夫的挫败感轻微地掩饰在其中。

他们的两个孩子，奥黛丽（Audrey，梅西·斯特拉 Maisy Stella 饰）和布莱恩（Brian，克里斯蒂安·康弗里 Christian Convery 饰），意识到了父母的不幸。那么，什么能拯救这段婚姻并保护家庭单元？难道不可能是时间旅行和恐龙的双重打击吗？

编剧兼导演大卫·罗伯特·米切尔（David Robert Mitchell）首先为我们描绘了一个熟悉的美国小镇景象：婚姻不和、邻里争吵、骑自行车的孩子、青少年的欺凌，诸如此类。但有一种棕榈树正在生长，当地图书馆员不知怎么恰好知道这种树已经在 2 亿 年前灭绝了，此外还有其他一些暗示着有怪事发生的迹象。而事实证明，这确实是一件怪事。

很快，在某种涉及耀眼光芒的宇宙干预之后，镇上出现了一头横冲直撞的三角龙。整个社区似乎被整体搬走并放置在了另一个时代，处于一个到处都是杀手迅猛龙的史前雨林之中。

米切尔的履历包括现代恐怖经典《它在跟随》（It Follows）（2014），所以他知道如何营造令人脊背发凉的紧张感。然而，我在观看《橡树街之终结》时感到的唯一强烈冲动就是大笑。当我们第一次看到格雷格从一个饥饿的翼龙类生物身边逃跑，而那生物愤怒地向他猛咬时... 哎，我恐怕脑海中浮现的是罗德·赫尔（Rod Hull）的那只鸸鹋。

总之，电影中有大量的逃跑和躲避那个流着口水的、鳞片覆盖的怪物，这个怪物最广为人知的通用称呼是“你觉得它会——”

时空旅行……入侵郊区的恐龙……这简直太疯狂了！

尤安·麦克格雷格和安妮·海瑟薇在这部科幻惊悚片中不经意地制造了许多笑点。

……我们看到了麦克格雷格在运用他那三四个招牌表情，尤其是他非常擅长表现的那种惊愕之情。

海瑟薇一如既往地稳健，在迅速进入全动作模式时，淡定地应对着这个荒诞的故事，她美丽的颈部闪烁着汗珠，无袖上衣展示出她锻炼有素的手臂。顺便说一句，如果你不介意剧透的话，她遇到的任何一只恐龙都没能弄花她的睫毛膏。

无需多言，这一切中处处都有另一部斯皮尔伯格电影的影子。不同之处在于，《侏罗纪公园》还算合乎逻辑，而这部片子则完全没有。但如果你想找部电影在吃一大桶家庭装爆米花时打发时间，它应该能满足需求。

■ 我在推荐《托尼》（Tony）时也持有同样的谨慎。这基本上是关于富有魅力的美国厨师安东尼·波登（Anthony Bourdain，不幸于2018年自缢身亡）的“起源故事”。

马特·约翰逊的这部电影记录了1975年的夏天，19岁的波登（多米尼克·塞萨 饰）逃离了他在新泽西郊区压抑的中产阶级家庭，前往热闹的鳕鱼角，追求一个他心仪的女孩。

在那里，除了100%的观众预料到之外，他出乎意料地爱上了烹饪。

现在，众所周知，三颗星是厨师们的最高追求，但在电影评分标准中，这意味着这部电影需要持保留态度地看待。《托尼》就是这样一部电影。

它改编自波登引人入胜的回忆录《厨房机密》（Kitchen Confidential）的部分章节，但感觉像没煮熟。虽然完全可以观看，且部分片段令人愉悦，但它很少能像预想中那样具有吸引力。而且某些叙事缺陷虽然没到令人反感的程度，但确实让人感到失望地平淡。尽管如此，塞萨（他在2023年的热门电影《坠落的继承者》中完成银幕首秀）在饰演托尼时表现出色，将他塑造为一个聪明、强势的青少年，表面上充满了自信的张扬，实则内心不安且易受影响。

我们第一次见到他是在大学申请创意写作奖学金时，他坚信自己能拿到，但结果没拿到。然而，他依然声称自己是以作家的身份来到鳕鱼角的，这是一连串谎言中的一个，旨在给漂亮的南希（由英国女演员艾米莉亚·琼斯饰演，她是亚历德之女，演技不错）留下深刻印象。

而枯燥的现实是他在一间由未具名的“主厨”（安东尼奥·班德拉斯 饰）经营的海鲜餐厅担任洗碗工，在那里，托尼很快被一名不按常理出牌的同事萨尔（由演技极佳且突然变得无处不在的里奥·伍德尔 饰）所吸引。

一系列具有塑造意义的经历最终让托尼迷上了烹饪，但如果你读过波登的书，你会发现这是一个被刻意净化后的版本，它在唤起餐厅厨房那种火热紧张氛围方面，远不如热门电视剧《熊家餐馆》（The Bear）。

此外，为什么没有人意识到班德拉斯饰演的角色比镇上任何人都帅50倍？而且，既然在五秒钟之内就能看出托尼根本不懂厨房操作，为什么主厨会相信托尼关于他知道自己在做什么的说法？

最终，这部电影给波登的生活带来的疑问比它解答的还要多。

真爱：贝拉·拉姆齐在《阳光舞者》（Sunny Dancer）中饰演艾薇

两部大胆的英国作品……以及一部新西兰喜剧

关于患癌儿童的电影需要非常精准的把控，否则会显得过于煽情。在少数几部成功之作（如2015年的《我和厄尔与垂死的女孩》）之列，我们现在可以加入《阳光舞者》（15, 106分钟，★★★☆☆）。

以《权力的游戏》而闻名于世的贝拉·拉姆齐在饰演艾薇时表现卓越。这个17岁的女孩性格刚强，白血病正处于缓解期，她很反感被父母（詹姆斯·诺顿和杰西卡·冈宁 饰）打发去一个夏令营

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在苏格兰，为患过癌症的孩子们设立。但与她的预期相反，她在那里结交了朋友，并第一次坠入爱河。一部幽默、大胆、不羁且感人的电影。

《Lady》（15岁分级，97分钟，★★★☆☆）是另一部具有鲜明英国特色的影片，这是一部“伪纪录片”，与其说是由希安·克利福德（Sian Clifford）主导，不如说是被她淹没了，被誉为“贵族版的卡戴珊”。

她饰演的伊莎贝拉女士是一个自恋者，她向摄像组敞开了她宏伟庄园的大门。这部电影有时非常有趣，但克利福德的强势表演在后期显得有些令人疲劳。

《Holy Days》（12A分级，101分钟，★★☆☆☆）是一部背景设定在新西兰的参差不齐的喜剧，讲述了一个悲伤的男孩（埃利亚·塔马蒂 饰）在三位修女（由米里亚姆·马格莱斯、朱迪·戴维斯和杰基·韦弗饰演）的照顾下生活的故事。温馨，但有缺陷。

所有评论的电影目前均在电影院上映。

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周五到了！剧院

作者：乔治娜·布朗 (Georgina Brown)

《另一半如何恋爱》(How The Other Half Loves)（伦敦，老维克剧院）

结论：一场高水准的演出

★★★★☆

《猫》(Cats)（摄政公园，露天剧院）

结论：几乎是完美的 (purifect)

★★★★☆

艾伦·艾克本 (ALAN AYCKBOURN) 创作于1969年的天才喜剧《另一半如何恋爱》是一部剧场奇迹。虽然大部分喜剧效果依赖于固定电话、阶级偏见以及被锁在水槽边的沮丧妻子，但这部对三段痛苦婚姻进行的一场荒诞且细致的剖析，具有永恒的娱乐能力。

在菲利普·布林 (Philip Breen) 流畅但并非完美无瑕的复排版中，要感谢罗杰·阿拉姆 (Roger Allam)。

他穿着一件塞进花纹Y型内裤的白色背心，双下巴像布兰曼糕一样颤抖，支支吾吾，绝望且滑稽地笨拙，在饰演弗兰克时散发出一种自命不凡的气息，却总是完全误解情况。“没什么能瞒过我，”他吹嘘道，而事实上所有事情都瞒过了他。他的妻子菲奥娜在凌晨2点回家，忘记了他们的结婚纪念日。与此同时，在同一个布景但不同的房子里，她的情人鲍勃（罗文·波隆斯基 饰）正在欺负他那无聊的妻子特里（由充满活力的艾莎·安托万 饰）。

布林的制作时间过长，节奏缓慢，在两对夫妇连续两晚邀请被当作情事替罪羊的费瑟斯通夫妇共进晚餐时达到高潮，而这两场晚餐在同一张桌子上同时重叠进行。

玛丽和威廉·费瑟斯通在餐椅上晕头转向。菲奥娜端上牛油果，特里则泼出袋装汤——最后汤全部洒在了威廉身上。

缺失的是支撑并驱动艾克本精心编排的混乱之中的真实情感潜台词。多萝西·阿特金森饰演的沉稳菲奥娜与罗文·波隆斯基饰演的傲慢、粗鲁的鲍勃之间毫无吸引力可言。

劳拉·埃尔斯沃西 (Laura Elsworthy) 那种死气沉沉的

罗杰·艾勒姆饰演的被戴绿帽子者在喜剧领域独树一帜

害羞且像老鼠一样胆小的玛丽是一个令人难以信服的漫画式人物。亚当·吉伦饰演的紧绷、控制欲强且残酷的威廉也是如此。他急于上厕所，身体因不适而扭动，但没有一秒钟地暗示出他真正的感受：因为必须对远比他高贵的上司弗兰克（后者将卫生纸称为“浴室文具”）说出“厕所”这个词而感到极度尴尬。

唯有罗杰·艾勒姆对那种盲目困惑状态的幸福演绎，在喜剧领域独树一帜。

■ 在《相对而言》（Relatively Speaking）获得成功之后，《另一半如何恋爱》（How the Other Half Loves）证明了艾克本并非昙花一现。同样，《耶稣基督超级巨星》让安德鲁·劳埃德·韦伯在音乐剧领域崭露头角……随后他在1981年凭借《猫》大获成功。

几十年来，那张标志性的海报——黑色背景上的黄色眼睛——在伦敦巴士的侧面闪现。

对于这部充满猫咪元素、如梦似幻的音乐剧的首次新排演来说，还有哪里比户外更合适呢？

演技精湛：右为饰演弗兰克的艾勒姆，左为《猫》的演员阵容

旧时的仿皮草和护腿袜已不复存在。导演兼编舞德鲁·麦考尼让他的猫类演员穿上了紧身衣，有的光滑，有的像杂种猫，全都配有令人不悦的、像老鼠一样细长的尾巴。

这部荒诞且没有情节的“毛球”剧基于T.S.艾略特的《波苏姆叔叔的实用猫指南》，它更像是一本角色目录，通过截然不同的舞蹈风格——以及劳埃德·韦伯将爵士、摇滚、放克和活泼的音乐厅旋律的精彩融合——来表达他们各自的个性。

当这些城市生物在夜晚出现，在巨大的生锈钢制月亮光芒下蹲伏、潜行、跟踪、巡视、慢跑和跳跃时，有许多令人欣喜之处。以至于如果对其缺失的部分进行批判性的攻击，似乎显得过于刻薄。虽然加里·威尔莫特饰演的剧院猫古斯是一个老吹牛者，被他的补丁外套抢了风头，但瑞秋·伍丁饰演的魅力渐失的格里兹贝拉用她嘹亮的嗓音点亮了记忆之 lane。

最响亮的喝彩给了丹尼·纳特拉斯饰演的蒙戈杰里及其盗窃同伙伦普尔蒂泽（布里安娜·克雷格）。还有杰特·尤饰演的闪闪发光的银黑相间街舞先生米斯特夫利斯，他拥有只有魔术师才有的魔力，在头上旋转并喷洒出亮片雨。以及杰登·维恩饰演的像贾格尔一样傲慢的巷猫， rum tum tugger。一群狂热的观众，其中一些人穿着豹纹装并戴着猫耳发箍，对此赞不绝口。

两场演出均将持续到September 19.。《猫》将于October 6在普利茅斯开始英国和爱尔兰巡演。

一场迷人的审判及其他艺术节亮点

爱丁堡国际节的边缘艺术节（Fringe）曾是一个规模较小的分支，多年来它像托普西一样迅速成长，完全掩盖了其母节的光芒。因此，这次能为EIP的作品唱赞歌感觉很不错。

以《毒枭》和《秘密特工》而闻名瓦格纳·莫拉带来了《审判——在人民之敌之后》（Lyceum，★★★☆☆），这是他共同创作并主演的易卜生剧作的现代葡萄牙语版本，他将其带到了艺术节。

故事设定在一个巴西的水疗小镇，莫拉饰演当地医生，警告水被工业废物污染。他被他的兄弟——市长（丹尼洛·格兰格亚）起诉，理由是危及城镇的繁荣。

其中大部分内容，尤其是兄弟俩激烈的交锋，感觉过于单一。然而，莫拉的表现令人着迷，几乎让人忘记了这场演出长达两个半小时且没有中场休息的、令人膀胱胀裂的时长。几乎。

■ 另一种形式的审判启发了阿曼达·诺克斯：《侧手翻》（Gilded Balloon，★☆☆☆），在这部作品中，这位美国人讲述了她在两次被定罪又被宣判无罪谋杀……

爱丁堡精选

她在2007年的意大利被指控谋杀其英国室友梅雷迪思·克切尔（Meredith Kercher）。这是她的故事，她有权讲述，但诺克斯（Knox）将这部剧放在喜剧板块显然是得到了糟糕的建议。这个主题并不好笑，她本人也不好笑——而剧本绝对不好笑。

■ 弗兰基·麦克奈尔（Frankie McNair）带来了一场关于如何将悲剧转化为喜剧的大师课。这位澳大利亚人在边缘艺术节（Fringe）首次亮相的作品名为《Huge Ass Mindset》（金气球剧场，★★★★☆）。她讲述了一个关于童年性虐待幸存者，以及近期戒酒的非凡故事。

这确实令人震惊。但不知为何，热情洋溢的麦克奈尔在描述她（仍在进行中）的康复之旅时，穿插了一连串令人捧腹的笑料——而且在最后一部分有一个令人惊叹的剧情反转。

该剧下个月将移至伦敦的苏豪剧院（Soho Theatre）；如果可以，请务必观看。

■ 克里斯·坎特里尔（Chris Cantrill）的《Rewilding》（猴桶剧场，★★★★☆）被这位幽默的坎特里尔坚称“不是一部政治剧”。相反，这位笑容可掬、戴着眼镜且自嘲的喜剧演员（他是成功首播的《周六夜现场》英国版（SNL UK）编剧团队的一员）向我们讲述了他在诺森伯兰郡一个村庄的生活。

起初，这似乎是一个田园诗般的故事。但随后发生了一件令人震惊的事。坎特里尔所描述的事情可能发生过，也可能没有，但这部剧极其荒诞且迷人，你离开时一定会面带微笑。

■ 在特拉弗斯剧院（Traverse Theatre）的一系列首演作品中，《For Dolores》（★★★★☆）脱颖而出。这是一部由爱尔兰剧作家伊娃·奥康纳（Eva O'Connor）编写、吉姆·库莱顿（Jim Culleton）执导的双人剧。

来自格拉斯哥工人阶级的莫（Mo，卡特里奥娜·费恩T饰）和来自爱尔兰中产阶级的雷尔廷（Realtin，拉拉·麦克唐纳饰）在大学期间有过一段激烈的关系。几年后，她们坐在心理治疗师的办公室里争吵……至于具体在争吵什么，直到最后才逐渐揭晓。

部分情节略显戏剧化，但这是一部关于爱、失去与友情的犀利且机智的研究，两位演员的表演都非常出色。爱丁堡国际艺术节将持续到8月30日（eif.co.uk），边缘艺术节持续到8月31日（edfringe.com）。

维罗妮卡·李（VERONICA LEE）

充满激情：瓦格纳·莫拉（Wagner Moura）在《A Trial - After An Enemy of The People》中

图片：MANUEL HARLAN / MARK SENIOR / CAD / LORD

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CHRISTOPHER HART

一个戏剧性的开端，然而朱巴证明了自己是一个精明的生存者，并长寿至 72 岁。

他同时也是一位卓越的学者和作家。为什么我们没有听说过他？唉，残酷的事实是，他生活中的许多细节都模糊不清，这就是为什么这部关于一位“失踪国王”的迷人肖像画读起来往往像一部侦探小说。作者在副标题中非常诚实——在朱巴穿行于这些动荡时代、处于更显赫的人物之间时，作者仅向我们提供了 15 个关于他的“片段”。

朱巴的少年时代在罗马度过，这在被击败的敌国子嗣中很常见。在那里，他与许多其他王室子弟一起，接受了无可挑剔的罗马上层阶级教育。

不久之后，一个名叫克利奥帕特拉·塞勒涅的小女孩加入了他们，她的父母是克利奥帕特拉和马克·安东尼，两人在惨烈的亚克兴海战失败后均自杀身亡。随着时间的推移，这两个孤儿，朱巴和塞勒涅结婚了，这看起来非常甜蜜，且线索表明这是一段幸福的婚姻。

与此同时，朱巴实际上会将自己视为罗马人还是非洲人？作者警告不要强加整齐或现代化的定义。这只会把事情搞混，就像称克利奥帕特拉为埃及人一样，而她实际上是希腊人。

他敏锐地警告说，“在试图寻找他的非洲血统痕迹时，我们冒着为朱巴构建一个他自己都不会认可的身份的风险”。

“罗马-柏柏尔-非洲人”也许是我们能说的最稳妥的称呼——而且他还会说希腊语。

明日消失 (Gone Tomorrow)

作者：李·查尔德 (Lee Child)

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这里有战争、王朝操纵、暗杀（最著名的是公元前 44 年对尤利乌斯·凯撒本人的暗杀），而在这所有的一切之中，朱巴二世国王虽然作为罗马一个谨慎且顺从的“附庸王”，但仍追求他的另一个伟大兴趣：学术，尤其是历史、地理和探索。

凭借对周围世界巨大的求知欲，朱巴撰写了诸如《罗马历史》、《论戏剧》、《利比卡》（Libyka，一部从大西洋到红海的整个北非地理和历史综述）、《论阿拉伯》、《论画家》等书。

他还写了一本名为《论相似性》的书，这是一本早期的语言学著作，追踪了拉丁语和希腊语词汇之间显著的相似之处。他甚至写了一本名为《论大戟》的书：是的，一篇关于大戟属植物的小论文。显然，他对植物学也很感兴趣。

唉，在这里我们同样被限制在

学术：朱巴二世撰写书籍以满足他对世界的好奇心

片段之中，因为他的众多著作中没有一本幸存下来。这其中并没有什么阴谋，他并非被刻意抹除，而仅仅是因为大量古代文献已经丢失。

书籍昂贵、稀有且脆弱，图书馆火灾惊人地频繁，随后是罗马的衰落和黑暗时代……希腊和罗马的任何文学作品能流传至今，简直是个奇迹。

随着《奥德赛》目前

性，高尔夫球车

2007 年 6 月的一个早晨，一名伊拉克医生和一名来自沙特阿拉伯的工程师驾驶着一辆装满丙烷气体的吉普车，冲破格拉斯哥机场出发候机室的玻璃门，直接撞上了一根巨大的混凝土柱……

虽然被拦住但并未被吓倒，一人向人群投掷汽油弹，而另一人则将燃料浇在自己身上并点燃。

但混凝土柱造成的延迟让警察和公众都有时间做出反应。这次“几乎无需任何代价的平凡干预”意味着只有五名公众受伤，而不是可能被杀死的数百人。

这只是记者加布里埃拉·贝内特在书中举出的众多建筑缓解危机的例子之一：

社会

如何建造一座城市 (HOW TO BUILD A CITY)

作者：加布里埃拉·贝内特 (Gabriella Bennett)

(Headline Press £25, 336pp)

凯瑟琳·斯普里尔（KATHARINE SPURRIER）

一本极佳的书。贝内特以其富有诗意且信息量巨大的写作风格，带我们进行了一场为期两年的环球之旅，停留在那些极具美感、孤独感与便利之地的场所。

她从苏格兰的格伦罗瑟斯（Glenrothes）开始，这是一个战后规划建设的新市镇，在那里，大卫·哈丁（David Harding）的艺术和社区建筑帮助为法伊夫煤炭公司（Fife Coal Company）雇佣的矿工们打造了一个邻里社区。

随后我们发现了在赫尔辛基地下挖掘而成的地下城市。这座规模宏大的空间最初建于冷战时期，现在设有购物中心、游泳池、卡丁车

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v1

书籍

从非洲男孩囚犯到罗马国王

被长期遗忘的雷克斯·朱巴二世（Rex Juba II）曾是尤利乌斯·凯撒的俘虏，他娶了克利奥帕特拉的女儿，成为了一位传奇学者——并且为加那利群岛命名！

在电影院上映，我们可以庆幸我们依然拥有荷马两部无可比拟的杰作《伊利亚特》和《奥德赛》，但我们也失去了他的“史诗喜剧”《马尔吉特》（Margites）。

我们对朱巴著作的了解来自于其他古代作者的大量引用和提及，例如大普林尼、普鲁塔克和 fitrabo。

其中一个有趣的发现是，朱巴将大西洋中新发现的岛屿命名为“加那利”（the Canaries），即“狗之岛”，因为那里生活着许多杂种狗。他以极大的热情书写这些新发现的土地，描述了普韦尔特文图拉岛（Puerteventura）上由单块巨石雕刻而成的神庙，以及戈梅拉岛（Gomera）上的巨蜥。他与妻子塞莱妮（Selene）在地中海沿岸优雅的首都洛伊（Loi）过着学者生活，他将其更名为凯撒利亚（Caesarea），以迎合海对岸的统治家族（非常明智）。那是坐落在高原上的王室之都，视野开阔，拥有皇宫、神庙和一座灯塔，全部由从意大利进口的顶级卡拉拉大理石建成，并用精美的雕像 lavishly 装饰。

他甚至在一次由名为塔克法里纳斯（Tacfarinas）的凶残土匪首领发起的叛乱中幸存下来，后者给每个人带来了无尽的麻烦。

如今，朱巴的首都（现为阿尔及利亚的谢尔谢勒镇）所剩无几，就像他的书籍一样，给我们留下了一种持久且略带忧郁的感觉，关于那个时代一个非常讨人喜欢的人物，而我们现在确实只能窥见其片段。

最糟糕的是，他的儿子托勒密最终被疯狂的皇帝卡利古拉处决，朱巴的王朝就此永远终结。

正如另一位伟大的古典作家奥维德所言：Tempus edax rerum，时间，万物的吞噬者。

以及未来的城市……

在俱乐部中：The Villages 的高尔夫球车

轨道，以及在俄罗斯袭击后的 24 小时内准备就绪的近 100 万张床位。

贝内特（Bennett）的许多发现都与战争带来的威胁或破坏有关。

在乌克兰，她不仅参观了居民房屋的基石废墟，还参观了旨在培训新一代重建国家的建筑学院。

在这一章节中，她生动地写到了基辅和利沃夫等城市的被毁情况，以及乌克兰人民在面对俄罗斯暴行时所展现出的韧性。

但书中也有轻松的时刻。贝内特突然扯到了《模拟人生》（The Sims）——这款生活模拟电脑游戏已售出近 2 亿 份。

作为一名狂热粉丝，贝内特理解构建一个可以由自己控制的世界和角色的吸引力，尤其是当周围的世界让人感到不确定时。

得知《模拟人生》是在游戏设计师威尔·赖特（Will Wright）的家在加利福尼亚州的一场山火中被毁后创作的，这虽然出人意料，但也不完全令人惊讶。

同样，瑞典人想出了一个巧妙的方法，来对抗在基鲁纳（Kiruna）镇所在山脉中开采铁矿带来的影响。

随着土地破碎和房屋瓦解，像基鲁纳教堂（Kiruna Kyrka）这样重 672 吨的建筑，被放置在焊接有 228 个轮子的遥控平台上，以每小时不到半英里的速度缓慢前移两天多，直到到达足够安全的距离。

这并非永久性的解决方案，但足以在几年内保证建筑的安全。

贝内特还挑战自己在东京度过 24 小时，在有机器人或自动化选项的情况下不与任何人类交谈。事实证明，这很容易。

然而，在佛罗里达州的 The Villages 则不可能做到这一点。这是一个巨大的退休社区，人们首选的交通方式是高尔夫球车（他们的教堂甚至为了让人们能开着球车进行“路过式礼拜”而进行了改造），而且每个人都过于熟悉彼此。这里交换伴侣者众多，据说性传播疾病也十分猖獗……

尽管书名如此，这项深刻的研究并非一份关于街道、公园和医院布局的“操作指南”。相反，它是一个关于韧性、力量和人类天生机敏的故事。

哪本书？

ARVIND ETHAN DAVID 作者

……是你现在正在阅读的？

利奥妮·斯旺（Leonie Swann）的《三大袋》（Three Bags Full），电影《羊侦探》（The Sheep Detectives）就是基于这部小说改编的。

这是一个关于一名牧羊人被铲子杀害的谋杀谜案，是以他的羊群的视角讲述的。它既是一部出色的侦探小说，又是一幅精彩且幽默的画卷，展现了从羊的视角来看人类是多么荒诞。

我正和八岁的女儿一起听这本书，她和我一样非常喜欢。我迫不及待想看看续集《大坏羊毛》（Big Bad Wool）。

……是你愿意带到荒岛上的？

那必须是一本我可以一遍又一遍阅读的书。已经通过这个测试的一本书是亚瑟·柯南·道尔（Arthur Conan Doyle）的《夏洛克·福尔摩斯全集》。

我在大约 11, 岁时爱上了这位伟大的侦探和他忠实的伙伴华生，我想从那时起，没有一年是我没有重新翻阅这些谜案的，无论是纸质书还是有声书。

我如此热爱这个世界，以至于决定将我的第一部小说《伟大的游戏》（The Great Game）设定在 1905 年的伦敦，并让我的英雄与年迈的夏洛克和华生——以及年轻的温斯顿·丘吉尔相遇。我希望我对他们都刻画得恰到好处。

……最初让你染上阅读瘾的是什么？

道格拉斯·亚当斯的《银河系漫游指南》。我记得当时在想：“天呐，我竟然不知道书还能这样写。”就好像我突然有了一个天才超级计算机死党，直接在我脑海中低语，让我变得更聪明、更酷、更有趣。

几年后我最终见到了道格拉斯，并且在我生命中的很大一部分时间里，一直致力于将《银河系漫游指南》和《德克·真特利》系列书籍改编成电视剧、漫画和戏剧，所以我想，他给我的不仅仅是阅读瘾。他还给了我写作瘾、“创造酷东西”瘾以及“享受生活”瘾。

……让你觉得索然无味的是什么？

直到现在我才敢承认这一点，因为之前太尴尬了，但我实在看不出查尔斯·狄更斯的意义所在。我知道他是国民瑰宝，帮助定义了我们现在所理解的圣诞节，而且 BBC 可能会一直改编《远大前程》直到时间的尽头——但除了《奥利弗· Twist》和《圣诞颂歌》可能除外，我觉得狄更斯的文字冗长乏味，且自作聪明。

■ Arvind Ethan David 所著的《The Great Game》（Thomas & Mercer 出版，£6.99）现已上市。

---

书籍 小说

文学小说

CLAIRE ALLFREE

PASSAGE

作者：Colin Thubron （Chatto and Windus 出版 £14.99, 144页）

THUBRON 的最新小说以一个足以媲美伊恩·麦克尤恩的场景开篇。一名女性在手术台上保持清醒，一边交谈，而外科医生则检查她大脑中的一颗肿瘤，那肿瘤在“一片粉红色和深红色的线圈乱局”中闪闪发光。

在这次被称为“清醒开颅术”的手术之后，凯瑟琳和她古怪的丈夫罗伯特前往埃及的帝王谷度假，罗伯特之弟艾伦随行，艾伦几十年来一直对凯瑟琳怀有一种可怕的单相思。

Thubron 将其作为旅行作家的数十年积累转化为成果，这部构思精巧的中篇小说以法医般的精准揭示了其主题——死亡、记忆以及人类知识的局限性。

然而，随着三人之间不安的三角关系走向不可避免的结局，其累积的效果是令人不安、奇异且奇妙的，这是唯有小说才能实现的。

LIFE OF M

作者：Rachel Cusk （Fisher 出版，£14.99, 192页）

CUSK 的出版商现在一定在幸灾乐祸地搓手，因为这本书已经产生了巨大的宣传量——据传该书是以她显然关系密切的朋友、演员娜塔莉·波特曼为原型的。（传闻还称波特曼对结果并不满意。）

然而，那些期待看到某种揭露丑闻式真相的人会发现自己被耍了：《Life Of M》更感兴趣的是真实自我与公众人物倾向于塑造的近似版本之间的紧张关系。

书中明显向波特曼的电影生涯致敬（在一部 M 饰演芭蕾舞演员的电影之后，一名资深舞者告诉 M 她跳得“糟糕透顶”）。但 Cusk 的资深读者不会惊讶地发现，这是一部语调正式、基本没有情节的小说，它深深地关注于我们当代文化中与各种形式的现实之间深刻的疏离感。

WHERE ARE THE KINGS

作者：Donal Ryan （Doubleday 出版 £16.99, 224页）

当杰克 12 岁时，他发现母亲的尸体漂浮在湖中。

他的父亲陷入疯狂，而杰克——通过一种令人心碎的青春期困惑视角进行叙述——被送到祖父母、罗斯姑姑以及三个叔叔家生活。其中一名叔叔仅比他大两岁。令他极度恐惧的是，他对罗斯姑姑产生了性迷恋。

这部设定在 20 世纪 90 年代爱尔兰的成长中篇小说具有史诗悲剧的预兆——但它也深深植根于家庭生活之中，因为杰克在逐渐了解自己的原生家庭，以及这些秘密可能对他产生的更阴暗的影响。

不过，Ryan 主要通过生动且具有光泽的流畅散文，提升了一个关于青春期悲伤和性觉醒的故事。每一句话都是一种享受。

法庭之王面临最致命的考验

经典

犯罪

BARRY TURNER

《凶手进场》（ENTER CERTAIN MURDERERS）

作者：Sara Woods

(Dean Street Press £10.99, 209页)

熟悉安东尼·梅特兰（Antony Maitland）系列推理小说的人可能会期待另一部扣人心弦的法庭剧。但在这位多才多艺的律师职业生涯的这一集中，梅特兰更像是一个行动派，他致力于破解一起针对臭名昭著的敲诈者的谋杀案。

故事始于一位女演员朋友的请求，她的情人是首席嫌疑人。梅特兰渴望提供帮助，但随着他的审问开始取得成效，他被卷入了一场危及自身生命的刑事阴谋中。

在缓慢的开局之后，故事在带有詹姆斯·邦德色彩的惊险高潮中推向顶峰，其中还包括一个让你爱恨交织的冷酷反派。

《赞美诗旋律之谜》（THE HYMN TUNE MYSTERY）

作者：George A. Birmingham

(Oleander Press £10.95, 237页)

这部设定在主教座堂区（cathedral close）的推理小说中，笼罩着安东尼·特罗洛普（Anthony Trollope）的影子。

那位古板的院长、他爱管闲事的女儿、一位专制的教区主任以及冲动的年轻教区牧师约翰·丹尼斯（John Dennis），这些人似乎都出自《巴切斯特编年史》（Barchester Chronicles）。

但除了教会政治，还有其他事情扰乱了他们平静的生活。当主教座堂的管风琴师——一位才华横溢但酗酒的音乐家——被发现头部被压碎时，教会管理层迅速统一口径，宣布这是一起意外。

然而，当管风琴阁楼里发现的一张纸碎片被认为包含关于珠宝抢劫案赃物下落的关键线索时，他们改变了主意。在得不到上级帮助的情况下，丹尼斯牧师决定破解这个密码。

伯明翰本人也是一名神职人员，在让我们通过一个棘手的谜题考验智慧的同时，他敏锐地捕捉到了隐居生活的荒诞之处。

《她为何而死》（WHY DID SHE DIE）

作者：Joan Coggin

(Galileo £10.99, 224页)

村里的每个人都赞美佩内洛普·史蒂文森（Penelope Stevenson）的圣洁。但她还有另一面。在受挫时，她自私且心怀怨恨，威胁到了她宠爱她的哥哥及其怀孕妻子之间的关系。一名被拒绝的追求者也看穿了她自怜牺牲的伪装。

但谁会想让她死？当她的尸体被发现，身边放着一把没有指纹的左轮手枪时，这就是问题的关键。

幸运的是，古怪但思维敏捷的卢平夫人（Lady Lupin）在场，引导警方远离错误的线索。

作为一名富有创造力的作家以及卢平夫人系列推理小说的作者，考金（Coggin）理应在黄金时代的名人堂中占有一席之地。

出道作

SARA LAWRENCE

《被留下的孩子》（THE LEFT-BEHIND CHILD）

作者：Romalyn Ante

(Chatto & Windus £16.99, 240页)

内宁（Yeneng）11岁时，她的母亲罗莎（Rosa）离开了他们在菲律宾的家庭，前往中东担任护士。

在罗莎离开之前，她告诉女儿要照顾好每个人，内宁将此铭记在心，誓要不让母亲失望。

很长一段时间里，内宁不明白为什么母亲必须抛弃家庭——她想象自己在人群中看到了罗莎，并经常担心她。邻居们议论罗莎背叛了他们，但内宁拒绝承认。

随着内宁长大，维持这个困难的家庭变得不可能，她的心对罗莎变得冷酷，并誓言自己的生活将有所不同。

然而，在被迫建立新生活的过程中，内宁意识到自己比想象中更像罗莎。我简直爱不释手。

玛布女王 (QUEEN MAB)

作者：艾米莉·麦克布赖德 (Emily McBride)

(一本 £14.99, 304页)

玛德琳 (MADELEINE) 是一名极具潜力的维多利亚文学研究生，她怀孕了，但不想告诉她的导师。在家里和丈夫汤姆 (Tom) 一起感到兴奋是一回事，但她害怕被评判。

玛德琳在婴儿时期从加拿大的护理系统中被收养，她渴望与疏远的母亲建立更好的联系，但两人的关系显得岌岌可危。

当婴儿莫德 (Maud) 出生后，玛德琳自己的需求似乎变得无关紧要，她陷入了妄想，将自己的经历与她潜心研究的文学女主角们的经历混为一谈。

玛德琳最初患有产后抑郁症，随后陷入了看似精神病的状态，汤姆和她的父母都不知道该怎么办。

这本书写得非常优美，充满了民俗、仙女和令人愉悦的文学引用。聪明且引人入胜。

健康的胃口 (A HEALTHY APPETITE)

作者：凯蒂·哈特斯通 (Katie Hutttestone)

(Dead Ink £10.99, 204页)

汉娜 (HANNAH) 30岁，患有癌症晚期。她已经病了十年，现在病情已扩散至身体多个部位，且对常规药物不再产生反应。

汉娜的医生告诉她，她是临床试验的绝佳人选。她的伴侣斯科特 (Scott) 极力希望她报名参加。但当她加入后，一切都改变了。

一直以来都是素食主义者的汉娜惊讶地发现自己开始渴望吃肉。在汉娜寻找稀有牛排的同时，她向斯科特隐瞒了此事，而斯科特为了她而成为素食主义者，且现在如此坚定，不允许家里出现肉类。

随着汉娜的病情减轻，她变成了自己认不出的一个人，渴望得到所有她不该拥有的东西。我快速读完了这个阴暗且与众不同的故事。

儿童书籍

萨莉·莫里斯 (SALLY MORRIS)

狗与熊 (DOGS AND BEARS)

作者：马克斯·波特 (Max Porter)

插画：多萝西·德·蒙弗雷德 (Dorothee de Monfreid)

(Fisher £7.99, 32页)

这是获奖作者波特的第一部儿童作品，将道德寓意、超现实幽默和极其有趣的插画完美融合。

叙述者讨厌“打架 (brawling)”，但喜欢大声读出这个词，立即鼓励孩子们一起参与。

打架源于狗群和熊群之间不断的争斗（熊讨厌狗的穿着和烹饪方式），直到在一次大打出手期间，大量被风暴吸起的鱿鱼从天而降。

当动物们团结起来将它们送回大海时，他们发现了和谐的快乐（好吧，他们仍然喜欢一点打打闹闹）。叙述者是谁？请等到最后一页……机智且睿智。3岁+

消失在稀薄空气中 (INTO THIN AIR)

作者：S. E. 杜兰特 (S. E. Durrant)

(Nosy Crow £7.99, 256页)

七岁的露娜 (Luna) 是个数学天才，想成为一名宇航员，而她的滑板姐姐杰德 (Jade) 则更加外向且受欢迎。

当他们热爱科学的父亲失踪后，露娜坚信他会在十天后回来，看着国际空间站经过他们家上方，但她向唯一的朋友凯西 (Casey) 坦白了自己的疑虑。

当威胁性的男人出现在房子里，且显然父亲并没有像他们母亲所声称的那样在“看望奶奶”时，孩子们集结他们的技能去寻找他。

以经济不稳定和“钥匙儿童”的现实背景为基础，这是一个扣人心弦的谜团，也是一个关于情感韧性的故事。8岁+

背叛者之巢 (TRATORS' NEST)

作者：弗朗西丝·哈丁 (Frances Hardinge)

(First Ink £16.99, 448页)

哈丁的技巧在于将神话和魔法与真实的历史细节相结合，这部复杂的中世纪冒险故事还探讨了权力以及谁在掌控权力。在另一个世界里，无名的玩家像移动棋子一样在土地上移动城堡，但无论城堡落在哪里，当地村民都必须为他们服务。

当15岁的伯尔 (Burr) 的家人因为一名新领主而遭遇悲剧时，他反抗了，但随后城堡在带着他和姐妹们在内的情况下被移动了。

神秘的继承人是谁？喜鹊少女 (Magpie Maiden) 又意味着什么？他们能利用这场“大游戏”来行善吗？这部作品引人入胜，发人深省，且充满了让粉丝们沉迷的反转。14岁+

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50 电视

vi

犯罪剧

《理发师》 (The Hairdresser) 悬疑剧，下午 2 点，BBC1

现在是万圣节，莉莉 (Lily) （萨莉·菲利普斯 Sally Phillips，如图） 在一家阴森的房子里有个预约，那里的一位 年长居民由一群 标本动物陪伴——而且，考虑到顶楼传来的所有奇怪 噪音，也许还有几个鬼魂。弗朗西丝·托梅利 (Frances Tomelly) 和夏洛特·霍格 (Charlotte Hoge) 客串出演这一集，充满了惊悚的乐趣。

困扰的侦探

《贝尔热拉克》 (Bergerac)，晚上 9 点，BBC2

吉姆 (Jim) 执着于将凯特 (Cate) 的谋杀案 归咎于亚瑟·韦克菲尔德 (Arthur Wakefield)，导致他犯了 更多错误，而他对 约翰·布莱克利 (John Blakley) 的痴迷越过了底线，总警司达拉尔 (Chief Supt Dalal) 可能别无选择， 只能将他移出此案。但如果没有工作来分散他对悲痛的注意力，吉姆 能否抵御再次酗酒的诱惑？

今日电视推荐

《The One Show at 20》，晚上7点，BBC1

你还记得《The One Show》在2006年8月14日开播时的情景吗？那时，Adrian Chiles和Nadia Sawalha是第一对主持搭档，为我们带来了如今已为人熟知的下午茶时间节目组合：名人访谈与来自全国各地的感人故事。如今，在经过20年和超过4,000集节目后，Alex Jones（如图）和Roman Kemp将邀请前任主持人及深受喜爱的嘉宾回到沙发上，共同参与一场延时周年特别节目。他们将回顾一些最令人难忘的时刻和鼓舞人心的故事，包括庆祝该节目在“儿童需要”（Children In Need）募捐活动中留下的遗产，随后将以一场音乐表演来纪念这一时刻。“我期待着一起回忆，让自己想起那些辉煌的时刻，并让一些前任主持人与目前的团队一起回到我们身边，”Jones说道。“当我开始主持时，我还比现在的Roman年轻。我与观众一起经历了人生中所有的大事——结识丈夫、结婚、买房、生孩子……所以我感觉自己是在这个节目中长大的。”我们希望他们能再次播放的一个时刻，是主持人Matt Baker出人意料地询问David Cameron：“你晚上到底是怎么睡得着的？”当时这位首相脸上的表情简直是无价之宝。

BBC1

6.00 《早餐节目》（Breakfast）

9.30 《动物公园》（Animal Park）(AD,R)

10.00 《追踪、寻找，拿回我的车》（Trace, Track, Get My Car Back）(R) 一名法拉利车主在看到其车辆被挥舞砍刀的歹徒偷走的监控录像后感到震惊。

10.30 欧洲田径锦标赛：伯明翰2026 第五天开幕时段的报道。

1.15 BBC一点钟新闻；天气预报

1.40 BBC地区新闻；天气预报

1.50 BBC一点钟新闻；天气预报

2.00 《理发师谜案》（The Hairdresser Mysteries）(AD) 万圣节来到Blossom Vale，随之而来的是一波犯罪浪潮。

2.45 《逃离城市》（Escape to the Country）(AD,R) Sonali Shah帮助一对夫妇在阿盖尔和比特（Argyll and Bute）寻找新家。

3.30 《修复店》（The Repair Shop）(AD,R) 专家们修复了一件连衣裙、一面鼓、一台打卡钟和一辆波罗自行车。

4.30 《答案奔跑》（The Answer Run） 由Jason Manford主持的问答节目。

5.15 《毫无意义》（Pointless）(R) 由Alexander Armstrong主持的问答节目。

6.00 BBC六点钟新闻；天气预报

6.30 BBC地区新闻；天气预报

7.00 《The One Show at 20》 Alex Jones和Roman Kemp主持的延时版节目，汇集了该节目过去20年中的一些顶尖人物、最受欢迎的故事和突出时刻。

8.00 欧洲田径锦标赛：伯明翰2026 Gabby Logan在亚历山大体育场（Alexander Stadium）主持第五天晚间时段的进一步报道，包括男子200米和女子800米决赛。由Jessica Ennis-Hill和Greg Rutherford进行分析，Steve Cram, Steve Backley, Andrew Cotter, Colin Jackson和Paula Radcliffe进行解说。

10.00 BBC十点钟新闻

10.30 BBC地区新闻 （随后为天气预报）

10.40 《安·卓伊德》（Ann Droid）(AD) Linda说服Sue去露营，以便在晴空下观看流星雨。

11.10 《母亲的直觉》（Mothers' Instinct）(2024) (15) ♦ 首播。剧情片，由Anne Hathaway和Jessica Chastain主演。

12.40 未来一周天气预报

12.45 BBC新闻

BBC2

6.30 The Answer Run (R)

7.15 Money for Nothing (R)

8.00 Marcus Wareing Simply Provence (BSL,R)

9.00 BBC News

10.30 Antiques Road Trip (R)

11.15 Homes Under the Hammer (R)

12.15 Bargain Hunt (AD,R)

1.00 Richard Osman's House of Games (R) Mehreen Baig, Clare Balding, Jamie Laing 和 Mike Wozniak 参加最终挑战赛。

1.30 The Finish Line (R) 问答节目。

2.15 Do You Know Your Place? (R)

2.45 The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Heart (AD,R) 东非大裂谷。

3.45 The Great Rift: Africa's Wild Heart (AD,R) 系列最后一集。

4.35 Vintage Antiques Roadshow (R) 团队回到雷尼肖庄园 (Renishaw Hall)。

5.15 Flog It! (R) 来自贝辛斯托克 (Basingstoke)。

6.00 Richard Osman's House of Games (R) Chris Bisson, Danielle Harold, Katharine Merry 和 Robert Webb 测试他们的常识。

6.30 Bear Grylls: Wild Reckoning (AD,R) 一对夫妇无法就应该购买什么样的房子达成一致。

7.00 欧洲田径锦标赛：伯明翰 2026 在亚历山大体育场 (Alexander Stadium) 进行的第五日晚间赛报道，包括女子 10,000m 决赛。报道在 BBC1 继续。

8.00 Gardeners' World 随着干旱给 Longmeadow 带来影响，Monty Don 盘点他的花园，并对未来应该种植什么进行彻底的反思。

9.00 Bergerac (AD) 关于 Cate 被谋杀之夜的一个揭露改变了一切。

9.45 QI XL (R) 主持人 Rose Matafeo, Lou Sanders 和 Ross Noble。

10.30 Newsnight (随后为天气预报)

11.05 On Falling (2024) (15) ♦ RLL 首播。一名在苏格兰仓库工作的葡萄牙工人，面对孤独与疏离。剧情片，由 Joana Santos 和 Ines Vaz 主演。

12.45 The Rapture (AD,BSL,R)

1.45 This is BBC2

ITV1

6.00 Good Morning Britain

10.00 This Morning 每日杂志，包含名人访谈、演艺圈新闻、生活方式专题、热门话题讨论、健康与美容建议等。

1.30 新闻；天气预报

1.55 地区新闻

2.00 Dickinson's Real Deal (AD,R) David Dickinson 和他的交易商在奥尔德姆 (Oldham) 摆摊，Alison Chapman 在这里获得了一些木偶，而 Cheryl Hackney 则看中了一枚精美的胸针。

3.00 Deal or No Deal (AD,R) Stephen Mullern 主持，Brian 尝试按正确顺序打开 22 个红盒子，挑战臭名昭著的银行家以赢取现金奖金：地区天气预报

4.00 Tipping Point (R) 问答节目，由 Ben Shephard 主持。

5.00 The Chase (R) Bradley Walsh 主持，Sacula, Vicky, Sophy 和 Paul 组成团队，挑战一名冷酷的追击者 (Chasers)。

6.00 地区新闻

6.30 新闻；天气预报

7.30 Abbey Clancy: Celebrity Homes (R) Abbey 访问 Olivia Bowen 和 Emma Thynn 的家。

8.00 Emmerdale (AD) Lewis 用一个宣布让 kiev 感到惊讶。

8.30 Coronation Street (AD) Lucy 的出现引发了冲突。

9.00 Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? 名人特辑 (R) Steph McGovern 和 Dion Dublin 回答问题，为他们选择的慈善机构赢取现金。

10.00 The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox (AD) 在因一项并未犯下的罪行入狱四年后，Amanda 和 Raffaele 获得了自由。剧情片，由 Grace Van Patten 主演。

11.00 新闻 (随后为天气预报)

11.35 地区新闻

11.50 Inside the Langham: Britain's First Grand Hotel (AD,R) 该旅馆的总经理监督朗廷威尼斯酒店 (Langham Venice) 的进展。

12.15 Shop on TV 3.00 Force of Nature (AD,BSL,R) 3.50 Long Lost Family (AD,BSL,R) 4.45 Unwind with ITV

CHANNEL 4

6.30 《女王之王》(The King of Queens) (AD,R)

7.45 《大家都爱雷蒙》(Everybody Loves Raymond) (AD,R) 三集连播。

9.10 《弗雷泽》(Frasier) (AD,R) 四集连播。

11.10 《拉姆齐的厨房噩梦》(Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares) 美国版 (R) 来自新泽西州。

12.05 第4频道新闻摘要

12.10 《寻找、修复、出售》(Find It, Fix It, Flog It) (AD,R)

1.10 《豪宅大赠送》(The Great House Giveaway) (R) 两名来自基德明斯特 (Kidderminster) 的陌生人在拍卖会上购买了一处房产。

2.10 《倒计时》(Countdown) 宝琳·麦克林 (Pauline McLynn) 在词典角。

3.00 《阳光之所》(A Place in the Sun) (R) 本·希尔曼 (Ben Hillman) 帮助来自苏格兰的汤姆在加那利群岛寻找完美的家。

4.00 《与佩内洛普·基思一起拯救乡村住宅》(Saving Country Houses with Penelope Keith) (AD,R) 在多塞特郡 (Dorset)，风暴威胁着马珀顿庄园 (Mapperton House) 的年度植物展。

5.00 《城堡DIY》(Chateau DIY) (AD,R) 在鼠尾草城堡 (Chateau de Sauge)，唐娜和保罗的套房翻新终于完工。

6.00 《美国淘金客》(American Pickers) (AD,R) 就在华盛顿特区外，迈克和弗兰克发现了一批来自美国最古老的自行车和体育用品店之一的库存。

7.00 第4频道新闻

8.00 《超级富豪的整形秘密》(Surgery Secrets of the Super Rich) (AD) 艾玛接受了 C9,500 纳米脂肪治疗以改善眼下阴影，而詹姆斯则通过一项长达八小时的移植手术正面解决脱发问题。

9.00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown (R) 吉米·卡尔 (Jimmy Carr) 主持这场喜剧文字与数字竞猜，乔恩·理查森 (Jon Richardson) 和罗宾·科纳蒂 (Robin Conaty) 对阵新队长罗布·贝克特 (Rob Beckett) 和基尔·史密斯-拜诺 (Kiehl Smith-Bynoe)。

10.00 《大肥 quiz：精彩片段》(Big Fat Quiz: Best Bits) 各种想象得到的竞猜灾难接踵而至，我们的演员在《大肥 quiz》的一些最精彩时刻中陷入窘境。

11.05 莎拉·米利坎：《话匣子现场》(Sarah Millican: Chatterbox Live) (R) 2011, 录制于伦敦布鲁姆斯伯里剧院 (Bloomsbury Theatre) 的单口喜剧表演，喜剧演员在其中分享了关于她生活的幽默见解。

12.10 比尔·贝利现场：《部分网络喷子》(Bill Bailey Live: Part Troll) (R)

1.35 《拉姆齐的酒店噩梦》(Ramsay's Hotel Hell) (AD,BSL,R)

2.25 《四人一床》(Four in a Bed) (R) 4.35 《夫妻来我家吃饭》(Couples Come Dine with Me) (BSL,R)

5.30 克斯蒂的手工艺之家 (Kirstie's House of Craft) (R)

5.40 《阳光之所》(A Place in the Sun) (R)

(R) 重播。(HD) 高清。(AD) 语音描述。(b / w) 非彩色。(BSL) 英国手语。

家庭观看 通常适合所有人

建议谨慎观看

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TELEVISION 51

机器人喜剧

安·德罗伊 (Ann Droid)，10.40pm，BBC1

戴安·摩根 (DIANE Morgan) 的专长是以冷面风格地道出极其不恰当的台词——在她的纪录片制作者菲洛梅娜·康克 (Philomena Cunk) 身上，这些台词源于她对世界极其无知的看法；但在她的机器人琳达 (Linda) 身上，则是令人不安的真相带来了笑料。这部情景喜剧成功地将这些笑料与真正深刻的时刻无缝融合，而本周琳达和苏 (Sue Johnston) 去露营时，琳达的残酷坦诚并不受欢迎，这两者都毫不缺乏。

电影选择

《母亲的本能》(Mothers' Instinct)，11.10pm，BBC1

安妮·海瑟薇 (ANNE Hathaway) 和杰西卡·查斯坦 (Jessica Chastain) 是让这部惊悚片大幅提升质感的爆炸性明星。故事背景设定在20世纪60年代美国那些带有白色围栏的社区，讲述了两名邻居（均为母亲）中一人失去孩子后所引发的后果。

第5频道

6.00 Milkshake! 《小猪佩奇》(R) 6.05 《小猪佩奇》(R) 6.10 《Tweedy & Flut》(R) 6.15 《Odo》(R) 6.20 《托马斯和他的朋友们》(R) 6.35 《消防员山姆》(R) 6.45 《小猪佩奇》(R) 6.50 《Pip and Pony》(R) 7.00 《汪汪队立大功》(R) 7.10 《Move It Milkshakers!》(R) 7.20 《小 rubble 和他的施工队》 7.35 《小猪佩奇》(AD,R) 7.40 《小猪佩奇》(AD,R) 7.45 《太空中的 Tim Rex》(AD,R) 8.00 《Stan & Gran》(R) 8.15 《汪汪队立大功》(R) 8.25 《帕丁顿熊的冒险》(R) 8.40 《本和霍莉的小王国》(R) 8.50 《袋鼠海滩》 9.00 《小猪佩奇》(AD,R) 9.10 《Operation Pavoome》(R)

9.15 杰里米·Vine (Jeremy Vine)

11.30 Storm & Alexis

12.45 5频道午间新闻

12.50 Matt Allevright

2.20 《我丈夫的七任妻子》 FM (2024) (PG) 第9部惊悚片；由 Kristi Murdock 主演。

4.00 《Castle》(R) 一个梦促使 Castle 和 Beckett 去寻找答案。

4.55 《Love Nature》(R) 冬季的艾莱岛，苏格兰最南端的内赫布里底群岛。

5.00 5频道新闻，由 Ban Walker 主播

6.00 《伊比萨：地中海之珠》(R)

6.55 5频道新闻快讯

7.00 《汤姆·里德·威尔逊的大旅行》(R) 在穿越阿尔卑斯山后，汤姆在科莫湖的美景中找到了慰藉。本系列最后一集。

7.55 5频道新闻快讯

8.00 《亚历山大·阿姆斯特朗在斯里兰卡》(R) 亚历山大前往印度洋的天堂之岛，探索其金色的沙滩和文化，从加勒这座堡垒之城开始。

9.00 《1975年的大干旱》(R) 回顾英国一次打破纪录的异常天气，该天气从 1975 年 5 月起持续了 16 个月，并在 1976 年达到顶峰，当时数千户家庭不得不依赖公共水龙头。

10.30 皮尔斯·摩根：未经审查 (Piers Morgan: Uncensored) 由皮尔斯·摩根主持的观点导向型新闻与辩论。

12.05 《逃票者：与法律的战争》(R) 1.00 《Cruise TV with LoveltBookit》(R) 2.00 5频道娱乐新闻

2.10 《全科医生：闭门之后》(R)

3.00 《Castle》(R) 3.45 《老友记》(AD,R)

4.10 《老友记》(R) 4.35 《与苏珊·卡尔曼一起巡航》(AD,BSL,R)

5.25 5频道娱乐新闻

▲ 特别容易引起反感

一个雕塑家、性工作者、一名被定罪的牧师……这座房子见证了一切

自然历史曾是 BBC 无可撼动的强项。但现在不再如此——Netflix 和迪士尼的无限预算使得流媒体平台能够创作出同样壮观的里程碑式野生动物系列剧。

但没有哪个广播公司能像“大姨妈”（Auntie，指BBC）那样出色地呈现人类历史。在过去的十年左右时间里，BBC 开创了一种创新的历史调查方式，这种方式在激发我们好奇心的同时，也触动了我们的情感。

诸如《真伪之辨？》(Fake Or Fortune?) 和《你认为你是谁？》(Who Do You Think You Are?) 等节目具有侦探推理的吸引力，但它们建立在细致的研究之上，关注点在于被遗忘的档案细节，而非尘封教科书上的日期。

其他频道，尤其是第5频道和 Sky History，曾试图模仿这种方法，但这种电视形式只有 BBC 能够精通。《时间之屋》(A House Through Time) 就是一个令人赞赏的例子。

我很想知道，研究人员在决定选择卡尔顿山这座五层楼的房子之前，考虑过多少个地址。

本周最亮眼造型：

斯蒂芬·麦戈文（Steph McGovern）在推出艺术交易游戏《大交易》（The Big Deal，BBC2）时发表了一次大胆的时尚宣言。她穿着一套亮粉色的裤装，涂着粉色指甲油，甚至连头发都带着粉色调。斯蒂芬，你的调色盘里就只有一种颜色吗？

爱丁堡，为了他们的第六季。为了在四集中维持一个叙事线，必须至少有十几个前住户的故事值得探索，而这座建筑从主持人大卫·奥卢索加（David Olusoga）走进大门发现两扇前门的那一刻起就显得很有前景——一扇通往底层和上面的两层楼，另一扇则通往分层花园公寓。

在他检查的第一间房里，他的目光被木质百叶窗上锯出的一个圆孔所吸引。拥有这座房子一半产权的女士莫拉格（Morag）对此有一个理论：也许曾经住在这里的是个航海之辈，喜欢盯着利斯（Leth）码头和福斯湾（Firth of Furth）观察。

模仿艺人如今已经过时了（女演员兼模仿艺人罗妮·安科纳（Ronni Ancona）说，他们是喜剧界的“parlabs”，“比腹语表演者低一级”）。这很可惜，因为奥卢索加极具模仿天赋。他那种，将，每个短语，分开的方式，

北爱尔兰电视节目变动

BBC1 15.40pm：《大交易》，由斯蒂芬·麦戈文主持。11.40 Am Droid。12.10am 电影：母亲的直觉 (2024) (PS)。1.40 BBC新闻。UTV 7.00pm UTV生活。与帕梅拉·巴兰泰恩（Pamela Ballantine）一起分享当地最佳聊天话题。7.30 隐藏的北爱尔兰。芭芭拉·麦克莱恩（Barbara McClain）倾听轮班中的故事，并探索一座教堂，而丽塔·菲茨杰拉德（Rita Fitzgerald）则参观一家装满宝物的商店。

威尔士电视节目变动

ITV 7.00pm 海岸与乡村。

94℃ 6.00pm 直播：疾病新闻 / dition 54℃ air Tyworld。12.05 金字塔出血。12.30 英雄。1.00 TV (YouTube)。1.30 阳光开启。2.00 / dition 54℃ air Tyworld。2.05 TV (YouTube)。2.55 / 54℃ 。3.05 TV (TV)。4.00 阳光之景。5.00 集数。6.00 直播 (所有通信)。6.30 卡姆登之景。6.55 / 54℃。7.00 英雄。7.30 / 54℃ 。8.00 迈克·鲁德森 (In--Million)。8.55 / 54℃ 。9.00 Am Droid 10.00 V Oelo。10.30 Miedig Ry Mowati。

克里斯托弗·斯蒂文斯 (CHRISTOPHER STEVENS)

昨晚电视评述

《时间之屋》（A House Through Time，BBC2） ★★★★★

甚至，每个，词，都带着，停顿，可能会，令人厌倦。

他在不说话时也会这样做，用眨眼和点头来强调他的想法。但当我们有如此多的信息需要吸收时，这种认真且有条理的讲述方式

比过度兴奋的语速快谈要好得多。

我们遇到了一位名叫威廉·菲茨西蒙斯（William Fitzsimmons）的牧师，他因为帮助从爱丁堡城堡地牢中逃出的法国战俘离开该国，差点被绞死。

雕塑家约翰·斯蒂尔爵士（Sir John Steell）也在该房中长大，他是11个孩子中的一个，他创作了这座城市深受喜爱的沃尔特·斯科特（Walter Scott）和威灵顿公爵（Duke of Wellington）的雕像。他的父亲是一名工匠，在让自己背负了 7,835 英镑 债务后破产——相当于今天的约三分之百万英镑。

但真正耐人寻味的住户将在未来的剧集中出现。这座房子曾一度是“一家高端妓院”。也许这能解释百叶窗上的那个孔……

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52 数字与点播

数字与点播电视精选

《哈姆内特》（HAMNET），晚上 8 点，SKY CINEMA PREMIERE

威廉·莎士比亚的妻子安妮·哈撒薇在历史书中仅扮演配角，但在《哈姆内特》中，她是核心人物。这部由赵婷执导的电影深情且令人沉醉，讲述了这对夫妇失去 11 岁儿子哈姆内特的悲剧。该片由爱尔兰演员杰西·巴克利和保罗·梅斯卡分别饰演安妮和威廉（如图），改编自玛吉·奥法雷尔 2020 年备受赞誉的同名小说，尽管赵婷显然在电影中倾注了大量个人情感。至于演员，巴克利的表演堪称真正的杰作。在不演过头的情况下释放如此强烈的直觉情感很难，但她成功做到了，尽管她将赢得赞誉，但梅斯卡也毫不逊色——尤其是在感人的结尾部分。总体而言，该片获得了 8 项奥斯卡奖提名和 11 项 BAFTA 提名。它赢得了 BAFTA 最佳英国电影奖，而巴克利不出所料地获得了最佳女主角奖——她在奥斯卡奖上重复了这一成就，成为首位在该类别获奖的爱尔兰女性。

法国犯罪剧

《每个人都在撒谎》（Everybody Lies），在 Channel 4 播放

这部古灵精怪的法国犯罪剧塑造了一位特立独行的侦探。文森特·韦尔纳（Vincent Verner，由 Vincent Elbaz 饰演）是一位富有魅力且直率的督察，他被坚韧的检察官爱丽丝·莫若迪（Alice Mojodi，由 Mariana Guyer 饰演，如图，与 Elbaz 同框）招募，负责处理与那些自认为可以逍遥法外的权贵相关的案件。他们的第一个案件是一名年轻女性的死亡，而线索指向一名人脉极广的商人。该团队能否证明他手上沾血？

单口喜剧

弗兰克·斯金纳：《30年的污垢》(30 Years Of Dirt)，晚上9点，Sky One频道

弗兰克·斯金纳 (FRANK Skinner) 的单口喜剧表演在沃尔瑟姆斯托的索霍剧院 (Soho Theatre Walthamstow) 拍摄，那是一个很棒的场地，但带有老派的感觉——而且该节目采用黑白拍摄，

这增强了那种印象，同时还加入了关于其观众通常年龄的笑料。不过，你永远无法定义斯金纳，这场表演与其说是老旧，不如说是轻松，这种特质源于数十年的单口喜剧表演和与观众打交道的经验。他自嘲但完全掌控局面，热情但冷峻，能够将话题引向任何方向，除了你预料的方向。这是一场喜剧大师课，话题涵盖从他与王室成员的接触，到关于伦敦停车的笑话，再到抱怨他现在除了纪录片和这个节目（当然）之外，再也没有人邀请他出演任何电视节目。

时间

BBC 4

E4

ITV2

7.00pm

9 (Scot 24)

13

6

7.30pm

逍遥音乐节的贝多芬第七交响曲：古斯塔沃·杜达梅尔 (Gustavo Dudamel) 带领洛杉矶爱乐乐团在二十多年来首次亮相逍遥音乐节，将贝多芬与加布里埃莱·奥尔蒂奇 (Gabriele Ortich) 紧迫的 Revolution diamantina 结合在一起

《辛普森一家》：幽灵般的万圣节恶作剧

《地板》(The Floor)：随着仅剩 57 名选手，竞争正变得激烈，罗布·布赖登 (Rob Brydon) 主持另一轮快速问答决斗

8.00pm

8.35 TOTP: 2000 盖尔·波特 (Gail Porter) 主持流行音乐排行榜节目

《名人烘焙大赛：为抗癌而站》(The Great Celebrity Bake Off for Stand Up to Cancer) 卷：Farrah, Michi Hatsuo, Katherine Kelly 和 Ben Miller 为慈善事业而烘焙

《1%俱乐部》(The 1% Club) 问答赛：由李·布莱克 (Lee black) 主持，问题关于逻辑和常识，50 名参赛者有机会赢得高达 10 万英镑

9.00pm

9.05 TOTP: 2000 盖尔·波特 (Gail Porter) 主持流行音乐排行榜节目

《电视观察》(Gogglebox)：为“为抗癌而站”制作的两部分特别节目汇总

《疾速追杀2》(John Wick: Chapter 2) (2017,15)：当一名意大利犯罪头目让他履行血誓时，杀手约翰·威克再次展开一场杀戮之旅。动作续集，基努·里维斯 (Keanu Reeves) 主演。包含 FYI Daily

9.30pm

9.35 TOTP: 1985 50 / 40 的音乐，由克里斯蒂·海恩德尔 (Christie Hyndle) 和凯特·布什 (Kate Bush) 演出

《美国之聚》(American Reunion) (2012,15)：参加高中同学聚会的老朋友们试图重新体验青少年时期的疯狂。美国派 (American Pre) 系列电影的喜剧续集，由杰森·比格斯 (Jason Biggs) 和艾莉森·汉尼根 (Alyson Hannigan) 主演（至 12.10）

10.00pm

10.05 TOTP: 1986 包含 It Bites, Lionel Richie, Phil Fearon 和 Chris de Burgh

11.25 《格里芬一家》(Family Guy)：斯图伊对 42 / 40 药物产生依赖

10.30pm

10.35 BBC 终极翻唱版本：回顾 60 年来的翻唱表演精华，包括 Moody Blues, Soft Cell 和 Sinead O'Connor

11.35 BBC 终极翻唱版本 第2卷（至 1.35）

11.35 《格里芬一家》(Family Guy)：乔长期愤怒的父亲 Bud 与 Quahog（至 12.25）

娱乐与纪实

5ACTION

Freesieve 33 Sky 150

11.45am 《枪烟》(Gunsmoke) 12.50pm 电影《西部往事》(Once Upon a Time in the West) (1860) (12) 4.00 《地狱公路》(Highway Thru Hell) 5.00 《高速公路抄截：捕捉英国超速者》(Motorway Copy Catching Britain's Speeders) 6.00 《警察拦截者》(Police Interceptors) 6.00 《高速公路抄截：捕捉英国超速者》(Motorway Copy: Catching Britain's Speeders) 9.00 《警察拦截者》(Police Interceptors) 10.00 《抄截》(Copy) 11.00 《X档案》(The X-Files)

BBC THREE

Freesieve 32 Sky 125 Virgin 107 7.00pm 《追击》(The Catch Up) 7.05 《致命60》(Deadly 60) 7.30 / 12.16 《博物馆奇妙夜：古墓之秘》(Night at the Museum, Secret of the Tomb) (2016) (PG) 9.00 《天堂岛谋杀案》(Death in Paradise) 10.00 《鬼魂：澳大利亚》(Ghosts Australia) 11.15 《他自找的》(He Had It Coming)

COMEDY CENTRAL

Sky 112 Virgin 133 12noon 《上风》(The Upper Hand) 1.05 《老友记》(Friends) 9.00 布拉德利与巴尼·沃尔什：《搞定老爸》(Bradley & Barney Walsh Breaking Dad) 9.30 凯文·布里奇斯：《全新巡演》(Kevin Bridges The Brand New Tour) 11.25 《无论如何都要现场演出？美国版》(Where Live In It Anyway? USA)

DISCOVERY

Sky 135 Virgin 177 11.00am 《离网建筑》(Building Off the Grid) 1.00pm 或 Jeff 洛基山兽医 (Rocky Mountain Vet) 3.00 《新制造》(New It's Made) 5.00 《阿拉斯加：家园救援》(Alaska: Homestead Rescue) 7.00 《淘金热：与 Freddy & Juan 一起进行矿山救援》(Gold Rush: Mine Rescue with Freddy & Juan) 9.00 《探险档案》(Expedition Files) 10.00 《盲蛙牧场之谜》(Mystery at Blind Frog Ranch) 11.00 《探险X》(Expedition X)

E4 (日间)

Freesieve 13 Sky 135 Virgin 106 11.00am 《甲板之下：地中海》(Below Deck: Mediterranean) 12noon 《辛普森一家》(The Simpsons) 2.00 《布鲁克林九九》(Brooklyn Nine-Nine) 3.00 《摩登家庭》(Modern Family) 5.00 《辛普森一家》(The Simpsons)

SSTAR (日间)

Freesieve 32 Sky 128 Virgin 136 12noon Traffic Copy 2.00 Police Interceptors 5.00 Shoplifters Caught Bed Involved 6.00 Home and Away

5 SELECT

Freesieve 46 Sky 153 Virgin 138 12noon All Creations Great and Small: Christmas Special 1.10 Murder, Die Wrote 3.00 Columbia 5.05 Domet: Country and Coast 6.00 Educational Engineering 7.00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 9.00 Taggart 特长篇

剧集。一名杀手家属成为被猎杀目标 11.05 The Forgotten Prince: The Mystery of the Duke of Kent

5 USA (日间)

Freesieve 21 Sky 141 Virgin 120 12noon Live & Only 6.00 NCS

FOOD NETWORK UK

Freesieve 43 Sky 144 Virgin 168 11. The Great British Bake Off 1. James Martin's Islands to Highlands 3.00 The Hairy Bikers Go Local 4.00 James's One-Pan Wonders 5.00 The Pioneer Woman 6.00 James Martin's Islands to Highlands 7.00 The Great British Bake Off 9.00 Marcus in the Med Malloca 10.00 Secrets of the Curry Kitchen 10.30 Mameet's Eats 11.00 Diners, Drive-Ins and Gives

GREAT! TV

Freesieve 34 Sky 157 Virgin 170 12noon Little House on the Prairie 1. The Waltons 4.00 Little House on the Prairie 6.00 The Irish RM 7.00 HVA'S'R 9.00 电影, Ghost (1990) (12) 11.00 HVA'S'R

ITV2 (日间)

Freesieve 4 Sky 118 Virgin 155 10. Dawson's Creek 11.10 Chaired 12. Jean or No Deal 1.10 Supermarket Sweep 2.10 The Floor 3.10 The Only Way Is Eases 4.10 The Real Housewives of Potomac 5.00 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills 6.00 Celebrity Carthighouse

ITV3 (日间)

Freesieve 10 Sky 119 Virgin 117 11. Heartbeat 1.35pm Midsummer Murders 3.35 Classic Emmenidas 4.40 Classic Coronation Street 5.50 Heartbeat

ITV4 (日间)

Freesieve 26 Sky 120 Virgin 118 8. 世界飞镖巡回赛直播，奥克兰大师赛：新西兰 Spark Arena 第一日报道，包含首轮比赛 12noon Dramatic Finishes 12.10 Magnum, PI 3.15 Bees 4.15 The Professionals 5.25 英国房车锦标赛集锦：Kirockhill 的精彩瞬间 6.55 Sharpe Munro 命令 Sharpe 杀死一名法国上校

MORE4 (日间)

Freesieve 18 Sky 136 Virgin 147 12. Come Dine with Me 3.30 Four in a Bed 5.50 Car S.O.S.

NAT'L GEOGRAPHIC

Sky 123 Virgin 183

11.00am Car G.O.S. 12noon Ultimate Airport Dubai 1.00 Air Crash Investigation 2.00 Erased WWII Heroes of Colour 4.00 Lost Treasures of Egypt 5.00 Battle for the Black Swan: Drain the Oceans 6.00 Planes that Changed History 7.00 Air Crash Investigation 10.00 Construction Falls 11.00 Air Crash Investigation

PBS AMERICA

Freesieve 84 Sky 173 Virgin 187 11. Fall of Japan in Colour 1. Weathered Earth's Extremes 1.35 Dugging Up Britain's Past 2.35 The Real Truth 3.40 Battle of Okinawa in 4.50 Fall of Japan in 5.50 Dugging Up Britain's Past 6.50 The Real Truth 7.55 Battle of Okinawa in 9.00 Fall of Japan in 10.00 The Real Truth 11.10 Weathered Earth's Extremes

REALLY

Freesieve 44 Sky 142 Virgin 185 12noon The Yorkshire Auction House 2.00 The Repair Shop 3.00 Salvage Flowers 5.00 Who Do You Think You Are? 6.00 The Repair Shop 7.00 The Yorkshire Auction House 8.00 Antiques Road Trip 9.00 My Lottery Dream Home 10.00 Help! I Wrecked My House 11.00 Help! My House Is Haunted

SKY ARTS

Freesieve 36 Sky 122 Virgin 123 12noon 电影, Seven Dads Mystery (1981) (12) 2.30 Tales of the Unexpected 3.00 The Eighties 4.00 Discovering Janet Leigh 5.00 Portrait Artist of the Year 22 6.00 Tales of the Unexpected 7.00 Alfred Hitchcock Presents 8.00 Guy Carney From the Vasilis 9.00 The Thousands and One Musical Lives of Fleetwood Mac 10.15 Classic Albums 11.35 Fleetwood Mac: Live in Boston

SKY ATLANTIC

Sky 108 Virgin 111 10. House of the Dragon 12.35pm Homicide: Life on the

RADIO

RADIO 4

FM: 92.4 / 94.5 / 95 / 02

5.00am 新闻摘要。5.04 简报室 (The Briefing Room)。5.32 天气预报。5.34 航运预报。5.43 今日祷告。5.45 今日农业。6.00 今日 (Today)。9.00 荒岛唱片 (Desert Island Discs)。嘉宾为神经学家帕梅拉·肖女爵士 (Professor Dame Pamela Shaw) 教授。

11.00 女性时间 (Woman's Hour)。11.00 食品计划 (The Food Programme)。11.45 本周之书：《广岛，8.15：失落的回忆》(Hiroshima, 8.15: The Lost Memoir)。作者：谷本清 (Kiyoshi Tanimoto) 和近藤光 (Koko Kondo)。

12noon 新闻与天气。12.04 12.15 稀土 (Rare Earth)。新系列。

1.00 一点钟的世界 (The World at One)。1.45 人类智能 (Human Intelligence)。2.00 弓箭手 (The Archers)。

2.15 剧集：中央情报 (Central Intelligence)。2.45 边缘生活 (Living on the Edge)。

Street 2.30 亿万 (Billions) 4.35 最后的生还者 (The Last of Us) 6.40 龙之家族 (House of the Dragon) 9.00 第十一站 (Station Eleven) 11.00 龙之家族 (House of the Dragon)

SKY COMEDY

Sky 113 Virgin 112

11.50am 威尔与格蕾丝 (Will & Grace) 12.20pm 排练 (The Rehearsal) 1.40 挺直 (Upright) 3.00 威尔与格蕾丝 (Will & Grace) 4.00 办公室搬迁者 (The Office Movers) 5.00 社区 (Community) 6.00 威尔与格蕾丝 (Will & Grace) 7.00 办公室 (The Office) (10) 8.00 办公室搬迁者 (The Office Movers) 9.00 莎拉·西尔弗曼：你爱的人 (Sarah Silverman: Someone You Love) 10.15 (伊冯娜·奥吉与完整的我 (Yvonne Orji & Whole Me) 11.30 排练 (The Rehearsal)

SKY DOCUMENTARIES

Sky 114 Virgin 121

12noon 谜题 (Enigma) 2.00 电影：《巴斯比》(Busby) (2020) (PG) 前曼联主教练马特·巴斯比 (Matt Busby) 的人物传记 4.00 导演们 (The Directors) 5.00 发现：格伦·克洛丝 (Discovering: Glenn Close) 6.00 速度女王 (Queen of Speed) 8.00 野蛮 (Savage)

今日电台精选

稀土 (RARE EARTH)，12.04PM，RADIO 4

今年夏天的一系列热浪——到目前为止我们已经经历了惊人的五次——无疑给许多人带来了挑战，并迫使我们质疑我们居住的公寓和房屋是否适用。今天，汤姆·希普 (Tom Heap)、海伦·卡雷尔 (Helen Carrell) 及其专家嘉宾将共同探讨

建筑师是否能够为我们的问题提供答案。他们能否提出一些房屋设计方案，使其能够被建造或改造，以应对极端高温以及在未来几年中气候变化可能给我们带来的其他挑战？还是说这个挑战过于艰巨？

3.00 园丁问答时间 (Gardeners' Question Time)，园艺讨论节目。3.45 短篇作品 (Short Works)。4.00 最后的话 (Last Word)。4.30 侧向 (Sideways)。5.00 PM：天气。6.00 六点新闻。6.30 民众已发声 (The People Have Spoken)，新系列。伊恩·史密斯 (Ian Smith) 为世界问题寻找讽刺性的解决方案。

7.00 弓箭手 (The Archers)。一个决定已达成，安伯 (Amber) 发现自己陷入了困境。7.15 添加到播放列表 (Add to Playlist)。新系列：索韦托·金奇 (Soweto Kinch) 和尼克莱 (Niclay) 挑选英国黑人音乐艺术家的曲目。8.00 有任何问题吗？(Any Questions?) 典型讨论，由亚历克斯·福赛斯 (Alex Forsyth) 主持。

Mountain 10.00 电影：《登山者》(The Alpinist) (2021) (12) 关于神秘的加拿大登山者马克-安德烈·勒克莱尔 (Marc-Andre Leclerc) 的纪录片 11.50 威廉姆斯与曼塞尔 红 5 (Williams & Mansell Red 5)

SKY HISTORY

Sky 123 Virgin 122 10.10am 杂乱无章 (Junk & Disorderly) 11.05 仓储大战 (Storage Wars) 12noon 战斗列车 (Combat Trains) 1.00 托马斯·杰斐逊 (Thomas Jefferson) 3.00 硬核典当 (Hardcore Pawn) 6.00 美国拾荒者 (American Pickers) 7.00 锻造之火 (Forged in Fire) 8.00 全定制车库 (Full Custom Garage) 9.00 第二次世界大战：战争见证 (World War II Witness to War) 11.00 人类探索 (HumanQuest)

SKY ONE

Sky 108 Virgin 109 12noon 大猫 (Big Cats) (小世界 Small World) 1.00 夏威夷 First-O (Hawaii First-O) 3.00 SW A.T. 5.00 辛普森一家 (The Simpsons) 8.00 abroad 傻瓜 2 (An Idiot Abroad 2) 9.00 弗兰克·斯金纳：30年尘埃 (Frank Skinner 30 Years of Dirt) 10.00 格里姆斯堡 (Grimsburg) 11.30 abroad 傻瓜 2 (An Idiot Abroad 2)

SKY SCI-FI

Sky 145 Virgin 140

11.00am 星际迷航：企业号 (Star Trek Enterprise) 12noon 星际迷航：航海家号 (Star Trek Voyager) 1.00 星门：亚特兰蒂斯 (Stargate Atlantis) 2.00 仓库13 (Warehouse 13) 4.00 星门 ISU (Stargate ISU) 5.00 星际迷航：航海家号 (Star Trek Voyager) 6.00 星际迷航：企业号 (Star Trek Enterprise) 7.00 星门：亚特兰蒂斯 (Stargate Atlantis) 8.00 星门 ISU 1 (Stargate ISU 1) 9.00 电影：《侏罗纪袭击》(Jurassic Attack) (2021) (15) 10.40 Gramm 11.30 行尸走肉 (The Walking Dead)

SKY WITNESS

Sky 107 Virgin 110 12noon FBI 2.00 博彩者 (The Bookie) 3.00 法律与秩序：刑事街道 (Live & Order Criminal Street) 4.00 无物可申报 (Nothing to Declare) 8.00 芝加哥医疗 (Chicago Med) 9.00 芝加哥烈焰 (Chicago Fire) 10.00 芝加哥警署 (Chicago PD) 11.00 博彩者 (The Bookie)

TLC

Freesieve 13 Sky 123 Virgin 113 12noon 《生活大爆炸》 2.00 《中间》 3.30 《少年谢尔顿》。

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FREEVIEW 黄金时段规划表 53

ITV3 / ITV4 / MORE4 / SKY MIX / QUEST / U&DAVE / U&DRAMA / SSTAR / 5USA

10 / 26 / 18 / 11 / 17 / 19 / 20 / 32 / 21 6.55 《心跳》当一群窃贼来到奥尔德斯菲尔德偷马时，迈克与苏格兰庭（Scotland Yard）联手 / 6.55 《夏普》夏普被门罗派遣去杀死一名法国上校，他在战斗中受伤，处于死亡边缘——但哈珀和一名随从开始照顾他恢复健康 / 6.50 Car 5.0.5 Fuzz Download 和 Tim Jane 修复 891 Flat Dino 轿跑车 / 《星际迷航：下一代》卫斯利·克鲁舍回来时发现企业号的船员们沉迷于一款新游戏 / 《古董公路旅行》玛姬·库珀和保罗·马丁在旅程的最后一程前往普利茅斯 / 《莫蒂默与怀特豪斯：垂钓》在汉普郡的泰斯特河 / 7.20 《夏日之末》西德和沃利的妻子对丈夫的 aridos 产生怀疑 / GPs: 闭门之后 在伯明翰，Yessin 出现了秃斑，担心是斑秃 / NCIS 吉布斯和团队在试图保护一名引起基地组织细胞关注的退役海军军官时，发现自己陷入了与 FBI 的深度麻烦中 / Doc Martin 马丁准备面对听证会，而一名访问 Perlemen 的访客回来研究她的家谱 / 7.55 《宏伟设计》生态学家弗雷德和通信经理萨弗伦·贝克开始在峰区建造他们自己的家庭住宅 / 《警察 24 / 7》警察追捕一名鲁莽骑摩托车的男子，警员们相互协作以锁定一辆涉嫌被盗的汽车 / 《约克郡拍卖行》在达勒姆，安格斯·阿什沃思在一名收藏家的小屋中发现了隐藏的财富 / 7.40 《我会骗你吗？》嘉宾：乔·布兰德、罗宾·考恩、保罗·福特和雷·米尔斯 / Father Brown 这位侦探发现一名凶手正利用模型村庄来计划其袭击 / 《急诊 24 / 7：分秒必争》当部门所有 IT 系统崩溃时，戴夫·沃克接管了巴恩斯利急诊室的情况 / NCIS 一名美国海军陆战队退伍军人继续承认 10 年前的一起谋杀案，因此吉布斯决定展开调查 / Doc Martin 马丁的医疗职业仍受到审查，一名 GMC 代表抵达对他及其诊所进行评估 / 《机械战警 2》(1990,18) 赛博格执法者与一名疯狂的毒枭搏斗，却不知创造他的公司正计划取代他。科幻惊悚续集，由彼得·威勒和南希·艾伦主演，包含 FVI Daily / 《及时行乐》汤姆代表一名承认谋杀的渔民，而西格妮发现了一个来自汤姆过去的威胁人物 / 《Vendetta》(2822,25) 当他的女儿被残忍杀害且法律正义看来难以实现时，威廉·邓肯决定自行执法。动作惊悚片，由布鲁斯·威利斯主演 / 《修复铺》杰·布莱兹及其专家团队为一场婚礼修复了一个冷钱包，为一名全球表演者修复了一把弗拉门戈吉他，以及一个 1920 的出租车计价器 / 9.25 《我会骗你吗？圣诞特辑》嘉宾：雷·温斯顿、Josh Wacktornbe、瑞秋·莱利和里基·汤姆林森 / Father Brown 费利卡里夫人的临时访问恰逢布朗神父在一家绅士俱乐部帮助一位朋友 / 99#: 危急状态 四个孩子的父亲在心脏骤停后被紧急送入医院，肯在从屋顶坠落后受了危及生命的伤 / 《美女与野兽》盖布康复，而凯特仍决心找到文森特。幸运的是，她后来找到了他，但发现他已变成了一个截然不同的人 / 《格兰彻斯特》一起可疑死亡事件打断了复活节游园会，并且

Alpha试图利用此案来转移人们对他个人生活的注意力 / 10.05 24 Hours in A&E 一名九岁男孩心率高得危险，医生担心一名32岁男子可能损伤了脊髓 / The Repair Shop 团队修复了一幅由著名苏格兰艺术家创作的画作、一件被称为“乌德”（oud）的阿拉伯乐器以及一名女飞行员拥有的飞行头盔 / Magnum P.L. 一名垂死之人雇佣Thomas寻找他的兄弟，结果发现其兄弟同样需要帮助，而此案勾起了关于一次失败的S.M.团队任务的回忆 / New Tricks 当一名自称是凶手的人在伦敦各处出现涂鸦时，团队重新开启了一起四年前的街头艺术家谋杀案 / A&E After Dark 赫尔皇家医院（Hull Royal Infirmary）的夜班工作人员努力挽救16岁少年Patrick的视力，他此前不慎绊倒导致眼睛被刺穿 / Beauty and the Beast 当Cat过于接近其任务真相时，Vincent绑架了她 / Grantchester Alpha在感情生活中遇到了麻烦 / 11.15 All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite 来自All Elite Wrestling世界的激烈动作对决（至 135） / 10.10 24 Hours in A&E 一名19岁女性在从二楼窗户坠落后因脊髓受伤被送入院内（至 12.15） / Grimm Nick和Hank调查一名被老鼠吃掉的受欢迎音乐教师的死亡事件，目标是指向一家害虫防治公司中像慢炖胎儿一样的角色（至 12.00） / How Do They Do It? 在纽约市中心酿造汽车驾驶者的技巧 / Magnum P.L. Thomas受命查明谁绑架了16岁的Amanda，而她已设法从绑架者手中逃脱（至 12.00） / 11.20 Luther 这名警察在试图掩盖一起死亡事件、对抗Baba并保护Jenny免受伤害的同时，还要设法找到凶手，其精神状态已处于崩溃边缘（至 12.40） / Trauma Room One 外科医生争分夺秒地为34岁的Milton切除危及生命的脑肿块（至 12.00） / Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 随着5 / 61小队在Benson的儿子Noah被绑架后展开疯狂搜寻，紧张气氛升级（至 12.00） / 11.50 Trial & Retribution 两部分之第一部分。发现了一具尸体（至 12.50） / How Do They Do It? 开采稀有宝石的相关工艺（至 12.00） / How Do They Do It? 在纽约市中心酿造汽车驾驶者的技巧

8.55 This Week in History

9.00 Natalie Haynes Stands Up for the Classics. 一本关于利用神谕回答人生重大问题的指南。

9.30 Breakin' the Cycle. Colin和D关闭了他们的帝国。

10.00 The World Tonight. 主持人 Shaun Ley。

5.00 The Big Bang Theory 9.00 90 Day France 11.00 Dr. Pimple Pepper.

U&ALIBI

Sky 109 Virgin 114 12noon Body of Proof 1.00 Death in Paradise 2.00 Murfinch Mysteries 4.00 The Mentalist 5.00 Hudson & Roe 6.00 Body of Proof 7.00 Private Eyes 8.00 Death in Paradise 9.00 NCIS Sydney. 一名海军合规官被发现死在一个水坑中，源于一次调查 10.00 Father Brown. 11.00 Private Eyes.

U&DAVE (日间)

Freeview 10 Sky 111 Virgin 127 11.25am Yukon Gold. 12.20pm Top Gear 2.20 Mortimer & Whitehouse. Gone Fishing 3.00 Guy Martin. Proper Jobs 4.00 Hazy Bikers. Best of British. 5.00 Rick Stein's Cornwall.

10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Vicar of Wakefield.

11.00 Americast.

11.30 A Good Read.

12midnight 新闻与天气。

12.30 本周之书：《广岛，8.15：失落的回忆》。

作者：Kiyoshi Tanimoto 和 Koko Kondo。

12.48 航运预报。 1.00 BBC World Service.

U&DRAMA (日间)

Freeview 20 143 Virgin 118 11.40am The Bill. 12.40pm Classic EastEnders 2.00 Classic Neophones 3.00 Photostatic Pearl. 4.10 Lovelyn 5.20 As Time Goes By. 6.00 Last of the Summer Wine.

U&EDEN

Freeview 17 148 Virgin 176 12noon How Britain Worked. 5.00 You Rang. M'Leef!

U&GOLD

110 Virgin 124 11.40am Dad 12.20pm Only Fools and Horses. 1.00 Keeping Up Appearances 1.25 Dads Army 2.30 The Green Green Grass 3.00 Are You Being Served? 3.40 Dad 4.20 Dads Army 5.00 Last of the Summer Wine 6.20 Keeping Up Appearances 7.00 Dads Army 7.40 Only Fools and Horses. 8.20

RADIO 2 FM 88-90.2M1F2

6.30am The Sara Cox Breakfast Show. 9.30 Vernon Kay. 12noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00pm Mark Goodier. 4.00 Joel Davenett. 7.00 Michelle Vangee. 8.30 Michelle Vangee. Handling Hits. 9.00 Sophie Ellis-Bexler's Kitchen Dams. 11.00 The Rock Show with Shaun Keaveny. 12midnight Romesh Ranganathan. For the Love of Hip-Hop. 1.00am Tony Blackburne Sounds of Soul.

RADIO 3 FM 90-2-92.4M1F2

6.30am Breakfast 9.30 Essential Classics. 1.00pm Classical Live. 4.00 Composer of the Week. Montgerault. 5.00 In Time. 7.00 S.L.V. BBC Pruma 2026. 10.00 Life Function. 11.30 Round Midnight. 12.30am Through the Night.

RADIO 5 LIVE

886-888.9M1F2

5.00am Wake Up to Money 6.00 5 Breakfast. 9.00 Nicky Campbell. 11.00 Gordon Smart. 1.00pm Elie James and John Robins. 2.00 Matt Charley. 4.00 5 Dime. 7.00 5 Sport. 8.30 Athletics. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. 1.00am Charlie Taylor.

Are You Being Served? 9.00 Porridge. 9.35 Pawltn Towers. 10.20 Not Going Out. 11.00 Mrs Brown's Boys. 11.35 Porridge.

U&W

Freeview 25 132 Virgin 125 12noon DIY SOS: The Big Build. 1.00 Tipping Point. 4.00 Property Brothers. Forever Homes. 5.00 DIY SOS: The Big Build. 7.00 MasterCard Australia. 参赛者看看他们是否能协作。 8.00 Pete Wicks: Pat Digi Sake. 11.00 Gavin & Stacey.

U&YESTERDAY

Freeview 27 155 Virgin 139 11.00am The World at War. 12noon Antigone Roadshow. 2.00 Bangers & Cash. 4.00 Great War Stories. 5.00 The World at War. 6.00 Antigone Roadshow. 7.00 A Perfect Planet. 8.00 Canal Boat Diaries. 10.00 Bangers & Cash.

体育

MAIN EVENT

401 Virgin 501

11.00am NFL 1.00pm 午餐时间 . 2.00 The Hundred . 5.30 The Hundred . 7.15 GFL: 伍尔弗汉普顿流浪者 对阵 布莱克本流浪者 (开球 Hym) 10.30 网球。

PREMIER LEAGUE

402 Virgin 502

12noon 转会谈话。 1.00 英超联赛中的 Brazillane. 2.00 City PL 冠军。 3.00 中的 Brazillane. 4.00 幻想秀。 4.30 故事。 5.00 年份。 7.00 转会秀。 8.00 阿森纳冠军秀。 9.00 转会 360. 10.00 Brazillane in the . 11.00 年份。

CRICKET

405 Virgin 501

10.00am The . 1.30pm The Bitesize. 2.00 The . 5.30 The . 9.00 The Bitesize. 10.00 The .

SKY MIX

Sky 416 Virgin 511

12noon 我的偶像：Kelly Smith。12.15 我的偶像：Mary Chollock。12.30 Dark Top：S Memento。1.00 NFL集锦。2.00 我的偶像：Nasser Peacock。2.35 我的偶像：Janine Peacock。2.50 现场女士：欧洲巡回赛高尔夫。VP银行瑞士女士公开赛。5.30 NFL集锦。5.45 NFL精简集锦。6.00 NBC的职业足球谈话。8.00 现场Indycar。9.30 法拉利：挑战者英国集锦。10.00 格斗之夜。11.00 NFL集锦。

TNT SPORTS 1

Sky 410 Virgin 521

12noon 欧冠联赛 — 经典赛。12.30 现场斯诺克中国公开赛。4.00 意甲 — 全方位冲击。6.00 TNT Sports Retard。5.30 MLB本周精彩瞬间。6.00 MLB集锦。7.00 幻想秀。7.30 AFL。9.00 意甲 — 全方位冲击。10.00 英超预览。11.00 足总杯：人民的故事 — 女子足总杯。11.15 MLB集锦。

TNT SPORTS 2

Sky 411 Virgin 522

11.00am 现场AFL。2.00pm MLB本周精彩瞬间。2.30 现场男子自行车职业系列赛。4.00 CPL集锦。4.30 Discovery高尔夫。5.00 欧超杯。6.30 注册 — 进入足球。7.00 英超故事。8.00 环法女子赛。9.00 UFC倒计时。10.00 裁决。10.45 为我们的未来而战 — 板球。11.00 CPL集锦。11.30 现场CFL。

TNT SPORTS 3

Sky 413 Virgin 523

10.30am 现场欧洲田径锦标赛。1.15pm CPL集锦。1.45 MLB集锦。2.45 Formula E Unplugged。3.45 现场ABB FIA Formula E世界锦标赛。3.50 环法女子赛。6.00 攀登。6.45 为我们的未来而战 — 自行车。7.00 UIM FHUO世界锦标赛集锦。7.30 现场欧洲田径锦标赛。10.00 斯诺克中国公开赛。

电影

FILM4

Freeview 14 Sky 313 Virgin 428 11.00am 克利奥帕特拉 (1963) (PG) 3.45pm 赛季之围 (1963) (U) 5.30 阿帕切山口之战 (1952) (PG) 7.15 地平线现场 (2020) (15) 9.00 狂怒 (2014) (15) 第二次世界大战剧集，由布拉德·皮特主演。11.40 邀请 (2022) (15) 1.45am 无限泳池 (2023) (18)

GREAT ACTION

Freeview 42 Sky 310 Virgin 426 1.00pm 特种部队。2.00 烈火特工。4.00 剥离精英 (2006) (15) 6.00 特种部队。7.00 烈火特工。9.00 运输特工：重启 (2021) (15) 11.05 复仇者联盟。

GREAT MYSTERY

Freeview 50 Sky 320 Virgin 435 12noon 难忘。1.00 10 显而易见。2.00 城堡。3.00 诊断谋杀。5.00 谋杀她写了。7.00 城堡。8.00 难忘。9.00 显而易见。10.00 早间节目之谜。谋杀永在 (2022) () 11.50

谋杀，她烘焙了一道致命食谱 (2016) ()

GREAT ARMANCE

Freeview 52 Sky 322 Virgin 434 10.15am 疗养之恋 (2023) () 12.10pm 正是我型 (2020) () 2.00 秘密百万富翁 (2018) () 3.50 花开之恋 (2023) (U) 5.45 爱在帝国 (2022) (U) 7.45 爱之盛典 (2023) () 9.45 仅为戏友 (2023) (U) 11.45 丰收之归 (2019) ()

SKY DRAMA

Sky 310 Virgin 450

11.25am 汉内特 (2025) (U) 1.35pm A.B.N Tree (2018) (U) 3.30 生而为星 (2018) (15) 5.45 艾琳·布罗科维奇 (2020) (15) 朱莉娅·罗伯茨出演。8.00 展台救赎 (1994) (15) 一个被野蛮入侵者错误地判定有罪的Sanket，在服刑期间与一名狱友建立了非凡的友谊。剧情片，蒂姆·罗宾斯和摩根·弗里曼出演。10.30 汉内特 (2025) (12) 保罗·梅斯卡出演。

SKY PREMIERE

Sky 301 Virgin 401

10.25am 乐一通：地球爆炸之日 (2014) () 12.05pm 汤姆与杰瑞：禁忌指南 (2025) () 1.55 爱我 (2024) (15) 3.40 在此 (2024) (15) 5.40 蓝色之歌 (2025) (12) 1.55 互联网 (2025) (12) 首映时代剧，由保罗·梅斯卡主演。10.15 正常 (2020) (15)

[...OMITTED...]

TALKING PICTURES TV

Freeview 83 Sky 324 Virgin 445 11.30am The Broken Horseshoe (1953) (PG) 1.05pm The Edgar Wallace Mystery Theatre. 2.15 The Adventures of Robin Hood. 2.45 Brandy for the Farms. (1952) (U) 4.20 Look at Life. 4.30 The Chesters. 5.00 A Family at War. 6.00 Reupses of the Bucky. 7.00℃ Cars. 8.00 Public Eye. 9.05 Collar Club with Caroline Moyes. 9.10 Supernatural. 10.10 Collar Club with Caroline Moyes. 10.20 Tales of Frankenstein. 10.55 The Devil Bat. (1940) (PG)

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白羊座 3月21日 - 4月20日 当我们在装修中途时，我们会注意到

每一笔刷痕，并经常怀疑是否选对了颜色。然后，在其中生活几天后，它开始感觉像家一样。情感往往也需要同样的调整期。今天鼓励你不要仅仅因为感觉陌生就匆忙改变某些事情。在决定某项近期的决定是否真正适合你之前，给自己一个适应的机会。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0301*

金牛座 4月21日 - 5月21日 我们很容易将寻找

足够食材来做一顿饭的能力视为理所当然。我们大多数人可以用出人意料地少的食材做出令人满意的东西。我们经常忽视自己的机敏，因为我们太忙于思考自己没有什么。今天将你的注意力转向已经在起作用的事物。丰盈并不总是以新事物的形式到来。有时它表现为对已有之物的重新欣赏。感恩永远在菜单之上。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0302*

双子座 5月22日 - 6月22日 什么时候“足够”才是真正的足够？是当

一种不快乐的感觉被如此有效地压制，以至于我们忘记了自己会有这种感觉的时候吗？总是寻求刺激的问题在于，当你到达名为“成功”的目的地时，地平线又移动了。你不能无限期地屏蔽负面情绪；事情必须经过处理才能有所进展。今天不要如此努力地试图去往别处。留意你已经走了多远，并欣赏眼前的风景。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0303*

巨蟹座 6月23日 - 7月23日

令人惊讶的是，当你度假时植物生长得如此之快。当我们停止关注每天每一毫米的生长时，厘米级的增长似乎一下子就出现了。变化在发生时往往难以察觉。情绪也是如此。你可能会觉得没有什么大动作在发生，而实际上稳步的进展正在表面之下展开。

JEMIMA GAINER

人们倾向于认为，如果没有发生戏剧性的事情，就没有重要的事情在发生。我们庆祝突破、公告和转折点，因为它们容易被识别。而那些思想沉淀、情感跟上事件、以及我们有机会倾听内心思考的安静时期，却很少受到关注。这些平静的间隙正是持久改变扎根的地方。在今天保持当下，信任过程并保持耐心，能让我们窥见一个更充实地未来。

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狮子座 7月24日 - 8月23日 舒适的沉默与尴尬的沉默之间存在巨大差异。有些关系具备在安静间隔中维持的灵活性，而另一些关系则需要通过不断的聊天来维持。面对谁时，你会感到如此放松，以至于觉得不需要表演？你生活中的谁允许你仅仅做你自己？今天请让自己被这类人围绕。并非每一个有意义的时刻都必须足够难忘，以便日后将其讲述成故事。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0305*

处女座 8月24日 - 9月23日 不同的日子需要不同的应对方式。有忙碌奔波的时候，也有休息的时候。啊，又是这个词……是什么让你对稍微放松一下这个想法感到如此不安？你真的在用一根脆弱的细线支撑着一切吗？还是你的神经已经绷得太紧而磨损了？月亮正处于你的星座，但就今天而言，至少从占星学上来说，没有其他太多事情发生。现在是处理疲劳并让自己解脱的完美时机。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0306*

天秤座 9月24日 - 10月23日 你的“休息日”中有多少最终被用来处理杂事，并且像往常一样忙碌？如果你在照顾自己恢复需求方面，能像确保每个人的要求都被优先处理那样高效就好了。你的储备并非无限。今天一次应得的暂停能让你重新填满精神之井。和平并非通过永无止境地坚持而创造，而是在你选择为其留出空间时到来。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0307*

天蝎座 10月24日 - 11月22日 你是否曾经重新找到一件最喜欢的毛衣，并好奇为什么停止穿它？熟悉的事物有时会无缘无故地消失。我们曾经看重自身的品质也可能发生同样的情况。今天鼓励你重新连接一种被近期需求所掩盖的力量。为了前行，你可能只需要想起那个一直在耐心等待另一个机会被利用的自我部分。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0308*

射手座 11月23日 - 12月21日 当你有时间挥霍时，风景优美的路线是非常迷人的。你可以注意到那些在匆忙中被忽略的所有小细节。今天你的潜意识表面浮现出了什么？你的注意力在哪个方面被转移得太久了？今天较慢的节奏允许你用一种有条理的方法来处理一件你因缺乏时间而一直回避的事情。成功不是由你走得有多远来衡量，而是由你在沿途学到了什么来衡量。对爱情、事业或人生选择感到好奇？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0309*

摩羯座 12月22日 - 1月20日

• 通话费用为每分钟 80便士，外加您的电话公司接入费，通话时长约为 4 分钟。请访问 jcainer.com 并加入 Jemima 的月亮圆环（Moon Circle），获取独家额外内容、视频、现场解读和令人兴奋的占星工作坊！如需报告电话线路问题，请致电 0330 100 0601。

你是否曾经重新发现一根属于 20 年前早已淘汰的科技产品的电缆？我们都会保留一些东西，因为它们可能再次变得有用。关于责任的信念也可能以同样的方式挥之不去。你可能仍在承担属于你人生早先阶段的义务。今天鼓励你考虑放下不必要的责任。这不会让你变得不那么可靠，而是能让你将精力投入到能产生最大益处的地方。好奇关于爱情、事业或人生选择？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0310*

水瓶座 1 月 21 日 - 2 月 19 日 你可能对某人了如指掌，但仍然会被某些此前从未在对话中出现过的事情所惊艳。这并不意味着你们的关系无效。我们衡量亲密程度的标准并非基于保留了多少个人琐事。关系建立在信任之上。而信任的来源与我们向世界公开分享的事实截然不同。今天，宇宙正为你提供空间去挖掘更深层的东西。好奇关于爱情、事业或人生选择？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0311*

双鱼座 2 月 20 日 - 3 月 20 日 有些日子，你所做的最佳决定就是不再需要做更多决定。不断的评估会让人感到非常疲惫。今天允许你停止寻找更好的选择，而仅仅是欣赏你已经选择的那一个。信任具有一种平和的特质，而过度思考很少能让人感受到这一点。你不需要让每一种可能性永远保持开放。有时，当你停止回头看还可能发生什么时，幸福便开始了。好奇关于爱情、事业或人生选择？获取个性化指导——请致电 0905 789 0312*

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停！

在花费 £200 或更多购买智能手表之前...

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逗趣诗

我们曾想尝试 去欧洲走走， 开车旅行而非 乘飞机飞走。 毫无顾虑之时 价格翻了四倍。 明年还是留在 家里飞吧。

比利·霍姆斯（Billy Holmes）， 德比郡，达菲尔德（Duffield, Derbys）

强度，对此贝丝（Beth） 回答道：“如果你一次 吃两颗，那就是双倍强度。” 不出所料， 贝丝现在在教数学！

D. 克拉帕姆夫人（Mrs D. Clapham）， 北约克郡，斯卡伯勒（Scarborough, N. Yorks）

谐音趣谈

KING'S LUNN —— 由Bally制作的皇家蛋糕。

LEAMINGTON SKA —— 沃里克郡的舞曲。

MOUNTAIN ASP —— 威尔士的克利奥帕特拉之蛇。

SHEPTON MULLET —— 萨默塞特郡的发型。

TUNBRIDGE WALLS —— 肯特郡的冰淇淋。

奥布里·卡特莱奇（Aubrey Cartledge）， 威尔特郡，梅尔克舍姆（Melksham, Wilts）

■ 请将您的投稿寄至：Peterborough, Daily Mail Letters, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY

本报由 ANL 出版，地址：9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY。印刷商为：Newsprinters Holdings Ltd (Brosbourne)；Newsprinters Holdings Ltd (Knowsley)；Newsprinters Holdings (Gunszentral)；AP Services (Jersey) Irish Times (Clywest, Dublin), Ireland；Bermont Impression, Madrid, TIFrint, SA, Tenerife；Miller Newsprint , Malta；Kronos Corporate Group , Cyprus；Millero Hellas Publisher Services , Athens；Atlas Media Communication, Dubai, UAE。2024年英国报纸的再生纸含量为 37.2%。

读者来信

乡村事务

感谢米内特·巴特斯（Minette Batters，《每日邮报》）就“尘暴英国”所面临的挑战发表的精彩文章。

多年来，农民们一直被完全忽视，甚至还要承受由“财务部的瑞秋”强加的令人愤慨的遗产税负担。

要求放弃高效农田以进行“再野化”的指令绝对荒谬，且减少了种植国家所需的高价值作物的可用土地。

我们不应依赖其他国家来喂养我们。我们应该重新学习只在季节内食用蔬菜。

如果能将家政课重新引入学校课程将会有所帮助。现在太多人完全不知道如何烹饪，依赖预制菜和外卖生存。

我们需要一个高效的乡村，以及振兴的高街。

杰奎琳·德林（JACQUELINE DERING）， 威尔特郡，科舍姆（Corsham, Wilts）

船只与靴子

内政部对船只危机的官方回应，如果不是如此严重，简直令人发笑。

据称，内政部与法国签署了一项按结果付费的协议，以增加地面部署的人员（boots on the ground）。

显然，除非这些所谓的“靴子”真正朝着船只的方向在地面上移动，否则这根本不会产生任何影响。

希拉里·戴维斯（HILARY DAVIES），安格尔西，兰格夫尼（Llangefni, Anglesey）

安迪（ANDY），不要浪费时间去巡访以了解人们想要什么。

他们想要停止船只入境，削减福利金，降低税收。瞧，这为你省了几个钱。

保琳·凯利（PAULINE KELLY）， 萨默塞特郡，韦斯顿超级马尔（Weston-super-Mare, Somerset）

迟缓的司法

回复约翰·威尔逊（John Wilson，读者来信），我们实际上已经出现了进入监狱的等待名单。

这是由于将犯罪者提交审判的延迟令人无法接受，随后在报告汇总后，量刑听证会又进一步延迟。

曾经的次日出庭以及陪审团裁决后由法官立即量刑是怎么回事？那些贪财的律师找到了增加收入的方法。

马丁·豪斯（MARTIN HOWES），萨洛普，特尔福德（Telford, Salop）

结果：痛苦

继安德鲁·尼尔（Andrew Neil）谴责我们巨大的国家债务（《每日邮报》）之后，我认为公众和政治家都有责任。

在某些时候，承担债务是不可避免的，例如全球金融危机和流行病。此类债务不能也不应被偿还

致信地址：Daily Mail Letters, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY 电子邮件：letters@dailymail.co.uk

■ 虽然我们无法逐一回复，但所有收到的信件都会被阅读和考虑。感谢您的来信。

直接到

观点

■ 马哈茂德女士，您怎么这么安静？有什么原因吗？

伊恩·费舍尔（IAN FISHER），汉普郡，南安普顿

■ 法国警方怎么可能没看到一艘载有 230 人的 49 英尺橡皮艇？

约翰·布鲁曼（JOHN BROOMAN），肯特郡，切斯特菲尔德

■ 为什么不直接建一座桥把这件事解决了？

彼得·泰勒（PETER TAYLOR），肯特郡，格雷夫森德

■ 首相为什么要进行什么“倾听之旅”？难道他听不到我在对他尖叫吗？

R. W. 伯克伍德（R. W. BIRKWOOD），格洛斯特郡，斯托克洛奇

■ 那个“梅克菲尔德首相”什么时候才能意识到，他不再是一名市长，而是一个国家的掌舵人？

J. 希伯特（J. HIRBERT），剑桥郡，彼得伯勒

■ 我一直被告知看一遍《奥德赛》是不够的。但对我来说足够了。

P. 赖特（P. WRIGHT），兰开斯特郡，奥尔德姆

■ 西尔莎·罗南饰演琳达·麦卡特尼？什么？！

T. J. 希克曼（T. J. HICKMAN），汉普郡，南安普顿

只有产生债务的那一代人才应该偿还。但坦白说，对政治家来说，唯一重要的事情就是掌握权力并赢得连任。

增加国家债务对他们来说无关紧要，因为在需要偿还债务时，他们早已离职。而且他们为产生债务不需要承担任何惩罚，比如被禁止担任公职。

然而，当债务可以传递给我们的子孙后代时，我们中会有多少人愿意投票给一个通过提高税收来偿还英国债务、以便让我们量入为出的政府？

只有当世界市场拒绝向英国提供贷款时，我们才会最终正视这个问题。

詹姆斯·威格纳尔（JAMES WIGNALL），兰开斯特郡，阿克灵顿

好鸡蛋

我想反驳托尼·克拉克（读者来信）关于鸡蛋吸收空气的观点。

实际上，鸡蛋随着时间的推移会流失水分，在蛋内形成一个气囊，因此它们会漂浮。新鲜鸡蛋不会漂浮，因为它们内部没有空气。

此外，我以为大家都知道在煮蛋之前要戳个孔。

桑迪·罗兹夫人（Mrs SANDY RHODES），西萨塞克斯郡，戈灵-拜-希

非凡

我的妻子皮帕

作者：伦·刘易斯（Len Lewis）

皮帕出生在牧师家庭，出生地是斯卡伯勒，但当她的牧师父亲被调往博塞特的一个乡村教堂，全家南迁时，她还是个孩子。在伯明翰的蓝衣学校（Blue Coat School）就读寄宿后，她进入索尔兹伯里技术学院学习，在那里她学会了盲打和皮特曼速记法。这些技能在她十几岁后期工作时发挥了很大作用，她先后在伦敦和巴黎担任秘书。后来她住在德国的奥尔登堡，在一家酒吧工作。她长得漂亮且受欢迎，在那里有过几段恋情。当她于 1967 年回到英国时，她怀上了女儿克莱尔。她顶住了让孩子被收养的压力，而是搬到雷丁与姐姐琼一起生活，并自豪地以单亲男子的身份抚养克莱尔长大。我于 1972 年在伦敦的一个派对上遇见了她，瞬间被她迷住。我们开始约会，一年后结婚，并搬到了埃姆斯沃思，那里靠近我雇主 IBM 的朴茨茅斯总部。我们的儿子蒂姆于 1975 年出生。

在 20 世纪 80 年代，皮帕开始了一项新事业。作为一名熟悉计算机的人，我建议我们购买并掌握这种新颖的文字

---

Page 57

顶级体育赛事应全部免费观看

我非常恼火地发现，格拉斯哥英联邦运动会只能通过订阅 TNT Sports 观看，结果导致报道质量极差：广告大约占 20%，专家点评占 70%，而实际比赛画面仅占 10%，许多主要赛事都被漏掉了。

这类赛事理应与英足总杯决赛和奥运会一样，被列入英国通信管理局（Ofcom）的“列明赛事”类别，根据法律必须在免费电视上播出。

当然，如今几乎所有顶级体育赛事都只能通过订阅 Sky 或 TNT 观看，唯一的例外（到目前为止）是温布尔登网球赛、部分田径赛，以及飞镖和斯诺克。明年灰烬杯系列赛仅在 Sky 平台直播，这简直令人愤慨。

如果安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）真的想为工人阶级以及我们其他人做点什么，他应该推动立法，禁止对包括英超和欧冠足球、F1赛车以及板球测试赛在内的重大体育赛事进行排他性的付费电视报道。

这甚至可能会带来某些连锁反应，包括

全力以赴：澳大利亚撑竿跳高运动员库尔蒂斯·马歇尔（Kurtis Marschall）在格拉斯哥比赛

那些“可疑”的互联网电视公司的倒闭，其中一些公司以远低于 Sky 或 TNT 订阅费的价格提供重大体育赛事的非法报道。互联网电视应该定位在提供免费频道的网页端报道。我不会因为 Sky 或 TNT 的收入损失而失眠。反正这两个频道都已经塞满了广告来增加收入。

安东尼·乔治·吉根斯（ANTHONY GEORGE JIGGENS），法国，多尔多涅

亲爱的 BBC，至少你们在报道直到周日在伯明翰举行的欧洲田径锦标赛，不像英联邦运动会那样。但是，能否请你们向观众展示更多正在进行的赛事，而不是让我们忍受你们那群专家没完没了、重复且令人厌烦的沉思，而此时田赛项目明明在背景中进行。

威廉·哈特（WILLEM HART），汉普郡，南安普顿

不完美的客人

如果正如亚历克斯·吉尔莫（Alex Gilmour，来自《灵感》栏目）所建议的，做一个好的房客意味着在抵达前寄一箱葡萄酒，那么我显然不是一名普通的《每日邮报》读者。

我猜如果从 Aldi 或 Lidl 买的一箱可能行不通。

芭芭拉·梅纳德（BARBARA MAYNARD），西萨塞克斯，奥德威克

向左走

在人行道上行走时（见《读者来信》），靠近马路的人应该在左侧行走，以便面对迎面而来的交通流。

曾经，贝辛斯托克的几条街道上的铺路石上刻有“在左侧行走”的信息，以帮助行人避免在黑暗中发生碰撞。

艾伦·布拉克斯通（ALAN BRACKSTONE），汉普郡，贝辛斯托克

安息吧

和读者伊恩·达克沃斯（Ian Duckworth，见《读者来信》）一样，我对挖掘古骨感到不安。

我已经向我的孩子们就我的火化给出了严格指示，因为我担心在未来的岁月里会被打扰。

莎伦·亚当斯（SHARON ADAMS），索美塞特，巴斯

简陋的厕所

剑桥市议会在安装几个公共“蹲式”厕所时，显然很少考虑到我们这些因为年龄或体弱而无法完成所需姿势的人。

所谓的包容性也就那样了。

C. 辛普森（C. SIMPSON），伯克郡，沃金厄姆

在 20 世纪 50 年代末，我和几个朋友在欧洲搭便车旅行，我们被发现的公共蹲式厕所给恶心到了，那些简直是不卫生的怪物。

我敢打赌，等到剑桥市议会的官员需要使用其中一个的时候，他们会把这些全部更换掉。

大卫·爱德华兹（DAVID EDWARDS），贝德福德郡，比林顿

本周读者来信

本周的获胜者是来自肯特郡西威克汉姆（West Wickham, Kent）的乔安娜·富勒（Joanne Fuller），她讨论了伦敦西区（West End）令人遗憾的现状。她赢得了由 Printer Fix 赞助的“本周来信”神奇马克杯。该马克杯在加热时会显示我们的《每日邮报》本周来信设计。如需定制照片礼品（右图），请访问 printerpix.co.uk。本周来信于周五公布。请写信至：Daily Mail, Letters, 9 Derry Street, London

Printerpix

WB 5HY 或发送电子邮件至 letter(s) dailymail.co.uk，请附上您的地址和电话号码。

生命故事

“一位提升生命品质的女性”：皮帕

在最近几个月里，您是否失去了想要纪念的亲人或朋友？我们的周五专栏讲述那些过着不平凡生活的普通人的故事。请将 450 字的悼词和一张最喜欢的照片发送至：lives@dailymail.co.uk 或写信至：Extraordinary Lives, Daily Mail, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY。请附上联系电话。

处理器并开始创业向公司演示。进展顺利，并使她获得了政治协会（Politics Association）的一个行政职位，该协会致力于推广政治教学。她负责为该协会的会议组织面向学校和学院的门票销售，并与历史学家兼教育家安东尼·塞尔登爵士（Sir Anthony Seldon）共事。后来，皮帕撰写了关于音乐制作和地方广播等主题的杂志文章。当她

采访唱片制作人托尼·维斯康蒂（Tony Visconti）时，他对他能用速记法逐字记录他的话感到惊叹。退休后，皮帕无法闲下来。由于她是一位出色的厨师，2004 年我们决定在布列塔尼的一个村庄共同开设并经营一家餐厅，我们在那里有一栋度假屋——那是愉快的四年。我们于 2018 年返回英国，搬到了威尔特郡。遗憾的是，两年前皮帕长了一个癌性肿瘤，并在

六月去世。在她的追思会上，安东尼·塞尔登爵士致悼词道：“与皮帕共事是一种快乐……她让一切变得如此轻松愉快，以冷静、权威和幽默对待他人。她是多么神奇且能提升他人生命品质的女性。”皮帕确实是一个美丽的灵魂，直到最后，她关爱他人胜过关爱自己。

■ 菲莉帕·玛丽·刘易斯（PHILIPPA MARY LEWIS），出生于 1947 年 9 月 5 日；逝世于 2026 年 6 月 7 日，享年 78 岁。

美国国务卿马可·鲁比奥（Marco Rubio）在华盛顿特区对埃德·米利班德（Ed Miliband）在说什么？请在对话气泡中写一段有趣的配文，并将其与您的姓名和地址一起发送至 pboro@dailymail.co.uk，请于 8 月 20 日周四前送达。被评为最佳的配文作者将赢得一张 £20 的图书代金券。本周的获胜者是来自德文郡埃克塞特（Exeter; Devon）的安东尼·考克拉姆（Anthony Cockram），他让国防大臣韦斯·斯特里廷（Wes Streeting）在巴罗-因-弗尼斯（Barrow-in-Furness）的一家潜艇工厂会见学徒时对安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）说：

如需获得复制剪报用于内部管理和信息传递之目的的许可，请联系报纸许可机构（NLA），邮政信箱 101, Tunbridge Wells TN1 1WX。电话：01892 525273。电子邮件：copy@nla.co.uk

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问题 为什么大多数动画片中的角色只有三根手指和一个拇指？

有些令人失望的是，动画角色大多比标准少一根手指，这主要是出于效率和成本的考虑，尽管一些观察者也提到了美学平衡——华特·迪士尼曾有名言，称一只手上有五根手指看起来像“一串香蕉”。

考虑到动画师每秒电影胶片必须绘制多达 24 帧独立画面，少画一根手指可以节省数千条线条，并大幅降低整个项目的劳动力成本。简而言之，四指手更容易绘制。

虽然四指手是行业标准，但该规则也有一些显著的例外。

在《辛普森一家》中，上帝被独特地绘制为拥有全部五根手指，以象征其神圣、完美的地位。

日本动画也倾向于五指角色，因为四根手指与雅库扎（Yakuza）犯罪组织相关联，该组织成员会通过仪式性地截断小指顶端作为一种赎罪方式——一些西方节目在面向日本播出时，甚至会为角色后期编辑上第五根手指。

然而，随着 3D 计算机动画的出现显著降低了手绘制作的成本和时间，行业规范是会坚持四指还是增加第五根手指，这将是一个有趣的看点。

珍妮特·弗雷泽，北安普顿

问题 4 英国历史上最长的一次无雨期是多少天？

英国记录到的最长连续无雨期出现在 1893 年的东伦敦迈尔恩德（Mile End），当时连续 73 天没有一滴可测量的雨水落下。更不寻常的是，这种情况发生在夏季之外，即 3 月 4 日至 5 月 15 日之间。

许多读者可能会记得 1976 年那个酷热难耐的夏天，当时南部和西南部部分地区

问题

问：我小时候如果坐立不安，我母亲会说我患有“圣维图斯舞病”（St Vitus's Dance）。真的有这种病吗？

迈克尔·埃文斯，萨顿科尔德菲尔德

问：在国家大部分地区处于干旱的情况下，为什么不将海水收集在单独的水库中用于冲洗厕所？

弗兰克·洛博，伦敦 SE25

问：苏格兰宗教领袖约翰·诺克斯在提到“女性的恐怖统治”（monstrous regiment of women）时是什么意思？

艾米莉·彼得斯，彼得伯勒

消失的手指之谜

爵士手：辛普森一家只有三根手指和一个拇指

英格兰曾连续 45 天无雨。人们将 1976 年与我们当前的夏天进行了比较，但 1976 年曾有连续 15 天温度超过 32.2 度，这使其成为比今年迄今为止经历的任何一次更长久的热浪。

然而，2026 年的夏天现在正式比 1976 年那个历史性的酷暑更加干燥。萨里郡的威斯利（Wisley）记录了 38 天无雨（且仍在增加），可追溯至 6 月 17 日。

英格兰和威尔士经历了 190 年前开始记录以来最干燥的 7 月，而整个英国范围内的 7 月则是自 1868 年以来最干燥的。威尔士还经历了有记录以来最温暖的 7 月。

在英格兰，公布的 6.5 毫米降雨量仅为 7 月气象平均值的 10%，且不到 1911 年此前记录的 13.4 毫米的一半。

英格兰三分之二以上地区和整个威尔士正式处于干旱状态。北爱尔兰没有干旱，有趣的是，苏格兰不宣布干旱，但会监测“水资源短缺”。

尽管所有这些干旱记录都被改写，但当雨水最终落在英国干涸、被阳光烤成黄色的草地上时，我们将面临严重的闪电洪水风险……真是久旱逢暴雨！

马克·戴维斯，皮尔，马恩岛

问题：英国何时引入了驾驶考试？这些年又发生了怎样的变化？

自愿性考试于 March 16, 1935, 引入，作为 Road Traffic Act 1934, 的一部分，随后在同年晚些时候实施强制性考试。

在 20 世纪 30 年代，每年有超过 7,000 人死于道路碰撞事故，因此当时存在提高驾驶标准的压力。

第一个通过自愿性考试的人是 R. Beere 先生，他为此支付了 7 先令 6 便士。

驾驶执照已由 Motor Car Act 1903 引入，而从 June 1, 1935, 起，所有自 April 1, 1934, 以来一直在驾驶的人都必须参加考试。

大约有 250,000 人申请参加考试，通过率为 63%。当时共招募了 250 名考官，但 1935, 没有考试中心，因此驾驶员会在市政厅、火车站或邮局等地与考官会面。

考试时长为 30 分钟，重点考察驾驶员控制车辆的能力，并包含一些至今仍存在于考试中的操作，例如倒车。

与今天不同，如果你通过了摩托车考试，就不需要再参加汽车考试。

驾驶员必须知道如何使用手势信号，不过这部分考试在 1975. 结束。此外，考试还会涉及关于《公路法典》的问题，该法典于 1931 年引入。

这部分考试在 1996, 被笔试理论考试取代，并在 2000, 数字化。2015 年，理论考试开始在危险感知序列中使用计算机生成图像，而非拍摄片段；2017, 驾驶员对卫星导航指令的响应能力被添加到实际操作考试中。

A. Simpson，圣奥尔本斯

■ 您是否有想要知道答案的问题？或者您知道这里某个问题的答案？请写信至：Answers To Correspondents, Daily Mail, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY，或发送电子邮件至 answers@dailymail.co.uk。我们会选取部分内容发表，但无法进行个人通信。

今日食谱：花生酱天贝米粉沙拉

无奶且低卡。2 人份 原料

菜籽油（用于烤盘） 2 汤匙 颗粒花生酱

1 瓣 大蒜，细磨成泥

100 克 天贝，切片并切成一口大小的块

沙拉部分：

100 克 米粉（vermicelli）

1 个 大青柠，取皮屑和汁液

1 汤匙 甜辣酱

1 根 大胡萝卜，切成丝

160 克 黄瓜，纵向对半切开，去籽并切片

2 根 小葱，细切碎

2 汤匙 切碎的薄荷

2-3 汤匙 切碎的香菜

做法

1 将烤箱预热至 200℃ / 风扇模式 180℃ / 燃气档 6。在烤盘上铺上铝箔纸并抹少量油。将花生酱与 2 汤匙沸水及大蒜混合，然后加入天贝并搅拌均匀。将其摆放在烤盘上，烘烤 10-12 分钟，直至呈金黄色。

2 与此同时，按照包装说明煮熟米粉，然后冲洗并沥干。在大碗中将青柠皮屑、汁液与甜辣酱混合。拌入胡萝卜、黄瓜和小葱，然后加入米粉、薄荷和香菜翻拌。盛入碗中，在顶部放上烘烤好的天贝即可食用。

Good Food 的 Sara Buenfeld

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周一 24 波特里，斯凯岛，苏格兰 波特里坐落在天然港湾内，周围环绕着色彩鲜艳的房屋和岩石峭壁。它是前往 Trotternish Ridge 岩层、Tusdale 遗址和邓韦根城堡的门户。附近是 Coruisk 湖，这里是海鹦、金雕、蛎鹬以及偶尔出现的海雕的栖息地

周二 25 斯托诺韦，刘易斯岛，苏格兰

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房产邮报

关于交换房屋以获得符合预算的绝佳隐居地的专家见解

享受美好生活的一隅

顺流而行：肯尼特-埃文运河（Kennet and Avon Canal）是宁静的伯克郡纽伯里（Newbury, Berkshire）的一道风景

Adlington 退休生活社区经过精心设计，旨在为晚年生活提供便利。每套高端现代公寓都连接着丰富的设施和景观花园，且可轻松抵达充满活力的当地商店和服务中心。因此，无论您是在私人公寓中享受安静时光，在餐厅款待家人朋友，还是与专业的团队聊天，您的新篇章都能真正让生活达到最佳状态。

提供一居室、两居室和三居室退休公寓，售价从 $199,950 到 $894,950 不等。

“它给了我们自由、安心以及我们真正享受的生活方式。” ——业主，Elaine 和 Richard

The Spindles, Menston, West Yorkshire, 01943 660530 Riverside Gardens, Knaresborough, North Yorkshire, 01423 222478 Brookfields House, Newcastle, Staffordshire, 01782 958850 Broodleaf House, Wylde Green, West Midlands, 0121 817 8680 The Newells, Kempston, Bedfordshire, 01234 988200 Radford House, Exeter, Devon, 01392 341515

adlington.co.uk / DMC

@AdlingtonLife @adlingtonretirementliving

ADLINGTON — 退休生活 —

*价格基于发布时间，另收额外费用。 详情请参阅网站或致电咨询。所示图片仅用于示意目的。

作者：Ben West

我们许多人都梦想着能拥有美好生活的一隅，远离城市的喧嚣，住在英国一些更宁静的地方。但由于在那些宁静且迷人的地方，房价通常较高，因此很难找到价格不至于昂贵到离谱的房产。

幸运的是，英国拥有许多令人向往的地点，它们同样具有吸引力，但却相当低调——这意味着房价要低得多。

我们询问了一些专家，了解在哪些地方可以寻找到价格实惠的世外桃源。以下是他们的首选推荐。

用西约克郡的 SLAITHWAITE 替代 SADDLEWORTH

Ryder & Dutton 中介公司的销售总监 JAKE Rowson 表示：“Slaithwaite 是约克郡最不为人知的秘密之一。

这是一个古老的纺织村庄，现在已经焕发出自己的光彩，独立商店、咖啡馆和酒吧定期开业，哈德斯菲尔德窄运河（Huddersfield Narrow Canal）贯穿其中，走出家门即可进行乡村徒步。

在山那边备受追捧的 Saddleworth，你很难找到一套低于 25 万英镑 的精美两居室小屋。而在 Slaithwaite，你可以用 20 万英镑 买到一套。而且村里有一个车站，有直达曼彻斯特和利兹的火车。”

值得购买：Slaithwaite Hall 被认为是科尔恩谷（Colne Valley）现存最古老的房产，可追溯到 15 世纪。这座卓越的二级登录建筑拥有五间卧室、一个宏伟的大厅、谷仓、储藏室等。可通过 Ryder & Dutton (ryderdutton.co.uk) 以 85 万英镑 购买。

用多塞特郡的 WEYMOUTH 替代 LYME REGIS

Connells 房地产中介的多塞特郡区域经理 JAMIE Grierson 表示：“对于那些热爱 Lyme Regis 的特色和海岸线，但发现房价超出预算的买家来说，Weymouth 提供了一个极佳的替代方案。

这座城镇结合了美丽的沙滩、风景如画的港湾以及前往侏罗纪海岸（Jurassic Coast）的通道，同时通常能提供更高的性价比。”

良好的学校选择、拥有全国连锁零售商和独立店铺的热闹市中心，以及极佳的休闲机会，也经常吸引着家庭入住。

值得购买：在英国哪里可以用 47.5 万英镑 买到一套拥有全景海景和私人屋顶露台的六居室住宅？答案是 Weymouth。可通过 Connells (connells.co.uk) 购买。

用 LOUTH 或 MARKET RASEN 替代 LINCOLN 或 NOTTINGHAM

虽然大教堂城市林肯（Lincoln）因其历史魅力和鹅卵石街道经常位居买家名单之首，但为什么不选择 Louth 和 Market Rasen 这两个市场小镇呢？它们提供了一种更缓慢的节奏

[...OMITTED...]

宁静：多塞特郡韦茅斯港口周围色彩斑斓的小屋

的生活，这里融合了传统遗产与社区氛围，且房价低得令人惊讶。

它们位于林肯郡沃尔兹丘陵（Lincolnshire Wolds）的边缘，拥有历史悠久的建筑和起伏的丘陵，且价格不高。这里有独立经营的肉铺、蔬菜店和其他商店，以及每周一次的集市。

“凭借其未受破坏的内陆和沿海景观，加上历史悠久的城镇和美丽的大教堂城市，林肯郡的吸引力在于其真实性和多样性，”Savills 的 Rupert Fisher 说道。

购买建议：一套一卧室的一楼公寓位于卢斯（Louth）备受追捧的 Westgate，靠近市中心。由 TES Property 出售，价格为 7.5 万英镑 (tes-property.co.uk)。

用康沃尔郡的圣科伦巴大镇（St Columb Major）替代纽基（Newquay）

Newquay 的 Miller Countrywide 分店经理 LILY Miegel 表示：“在起伏的康沃尔乡村之中，圣科伦巴大镇是一座富有历史、特色和永恒魅力的城镇。”

“它在宁静的集镇生活与便捷前往康沃尔壮丽北海岸之间取得了完美平衡，对于那些追求慢生活的人来说，这里已成为一个日益向往的目的地。”

古朴的街道、传统的酒吧和社区感营造出一种热情且持久的氛围。

购买建议：圣科伦巴大镇集市广场（Market Place）的一套一居室公寓拥有开放式厨房和起居区。该房产通过现代拍卖方式（Modern Method of Auction）出售，这意味着买家和卖家将在 56 天内完成交易。由 Miller Countrywide 出售，起拍价 8.5 万英镑 (millercountrywide.co.uk)。

用伯克郡的纽伯里（Newbury）替代牛津或雷丁

Savills 的 VICTORIA Anderson-Stewart 表示：“纽伯里是一座繁荣且充满活力的历史集镇，被美丽的乡村环绕，并拥有极佳的交通连接。”

“这里有很多值得体验的地方，包括两家受欢迎的剧院、每周两次的集市，以及种类繁多的餐饮店，既有独立店铺，也有知名品牌。”

“在附近众多村庄中，有许多备受好评的酒吧可供选择。”

购买建议：纽伯里边缘的新开发项目 Knights Grove 提供三居室至五居室的住宅。由 Savills 出售，价格 51 万英镑 起 (savills.com)。

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xx

让生活变得美味且简单

无需订阅，无需承诺。 只要您想要，就有美食。

有了 Wiltshire Farm Foods，您可以享用美味且令人满足的餐点，无需依赖他人。直接将食物从冷冻库取出，放入微波炉或烤箱即可；您可以放心，您即将享用的不仅是一顿美味的餐点，而且是用优质原料制成，且不含人工色素和香料。无需任何费力，即可享受家常味道。

Over 300 dishes

我们满足多种饮食需求和分量大小；例如低脂、低盐、无过敏原及无麸质餐点。有 300 种餐点可供选择，足以让您全天感到满足。

传统的优质服务

没有订阅费或配送费*，只有您可以信赖的传统优质服务。如果您需要我们，只需拨打电话——我们随时乐意提供帮助。

电视节目曾出现

为美味的夏天干杯！

• ✓ 冷冻状态即可轻松烹饪，使用烤箱或微波炉
• ✓ Over 300 dishes to choose from
• ✓ 大多数餐点附带蔬菜或配菜
• ✓ 无需订阅
• ✓ 免费配送▲
• ✓ 如果您不喜欢某道餐点，我们将免费为您发送一份新的*

“食物尝起来像家常菜，而且餐点和分量的选择非常多样。”

Ms T - Wiltshire Farm Foods 客户

立即申请您的夏季手册

致电 0800 066 3202

或访问 wiltshirefarmfoods.com

▲ 部分地区有最低订单要求。

• 条款与条件请参阅网站。

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“优秀” 基于 65,247 条评论（截至 07 / 08 / 2026）

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City Finance

FTSE 100 60.48 NASDAQ 100 341.90 GOLD 55.11 10772.67 0.56% 30084.50 1.15% $4373.42 1.24% FTSE 250 22.83 S&P 500 50.49 OIL 0.67 24837.71 0.09% 7798.99 0.65% $88.23 0.75% £ / $ 1.3495 £ / € 1.1702 0.0015 0.0004

城市编辑 Alex Brunner

www.thisinoneye.co.uk

商业编辑 Hugo Duncan

预算不确定性可能会“扼杀”英国增长

首相昨晚收到警告，预算的不确定性可能会“扼杀”这个脆弱经济体的增长。

官方数据显示，由于温暖的天气和世界杯在6月份带动了业务，抵消了伊朗战争带来的冲击，今年第二季度的产出增长了0.4%。

但这低于2026年前三个月0.6%的扩张幅度，分析人士警告称，随着价格上涨和借贷成本升高产生影响，情况可能会进一步恶化。

该报告强调了安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）及其财政大臣约翰·希利（John Healey）面临的任务，两人曾誓言要“推动每个邮政编码区的增长”。人们担心他们的计划

作者：雨果·邓肯（Hugo Duncan）

将涉及£25bn的加税，这将打击家庭和企业，并使经济陷入倒退。

与此同时，财政部官员表示，如果唐纳德·特朗普继续对伊朗发动战争，经济将陷入停滞，明年的增长率预计仅为0.3%。

WPI Strategy首席经济学家马丁·贝克（Martin Beck）表示：“前景仍然容易受到国际冲击和国内政策失误的影响。”

“中东地区的进展可能会再次瓦解，而10月的预算可能会对投资和资本征收巨额税款，或者为企业响应市场信号设置新的障碍。关于财政大臣可能宣布什么的另一轮长期猜测，将鼓励企业推迟招聘和投资，即使最终的加税程度比担心的要轻。”

“一个更强劲的前景现在是可能的，但政策仍然有能力将其扼杀。”

毕马威（KPMG）首席经济学家雅埃尔·塞尔芬（Yael Selfin）表示：“英国经济在上半年以强劲的态势收官，但势头在未来几个月可能会减弱。”

“注意力将转向预算中财政政策的潜在变化。围绕财政政策的任何长期猜测都可能导致公司推迟投资决策，以及家庭在消费方面采取更谨慎的态度。”

国家统计局的数据显示，虽然服务业在工党执政以来有所增长，但制造业和建筑业的产出有所萎缩。

Panmure Liberum经济学家西蒙·弗伦奇（Simon French）表示：“每个邮政编码区的增长？那么每个行业的增长如何？”

帮助资助小企业的Simply Asset Finance首席执行官迈克·兰德尔（Mike Randall）表示：“‘每个邮政编码区的增长’需要停止成为一个政党口号，而应真正转化为消除阻碍优秀企业开展工作的障碍。”

艾希利以 4000万美元 救市收购哈维·尼科尔斯

作者：艾米莉·霍金斯 (Emily Hawkins)

迈克·艾希利 (Mike Ashley) 旗下的 Frasers Group 以 4000 万英镑m 的价格收购了哈维·尼科尔斯 (Harvey Nichols) —— 但在人们对就业机会感到担忧之际，该公司警告称，哈维·尼科尔斯将变成一家“规模更小的企业”。

这位商业大亨的帝国包括 Sports Direct 和 House of Fraser，他于昨日在该公司进入破产管理程序后将其买下。

此次救市包括位于英国的六家哈维·尼科尔斯门店，但不包括都柏林门店，并暂时保障了 1,000 个工作岗位。人们担心，随着 Frasers 试图振兴这家陷入困境的企业，随后将出现裁员。

Frasers 首席执行官迈克尔·默里 (Michael Murray) 是艾希利的女婿，他警告称未来将面临“艰难的选择”。

他表示：“我们准备好做出这些决定，即使这意味着短期内企业规模会缩小。”

Frasers 未披露具体支付金额，但据认为约为 4000 万英镑m。

它将购买六家百货商店 —— 包括位于骑士桥的旗舰店，以及爱丁堡、伯明翰、利兹、曼彻斯特和布里斯托的门店 —— 以及网站和特许经营权（包括迪拜和科威特的店铺）。

尽管 Frasers 从都柏林门店购买了库存和店面固定装置，但并未购买该店铺，并表示关于其未来的讨论“仍在进行中”。

自从所有者潘迪克森·潘 (Dickson Poon) 在 6 月将哈维·尼科尔斯挂牌出售以来，员工一直面临着不确定性。

此次交易不包括 Oxo Tower 餐厅，该餐厅已出售给另一买家。

艾希利上周表示，该连锁店正处于“死亡螺旋”中。昨晚，默里表示：“哈维

《绝对时尚》(Ab Fab)：BBC 电视剧中的艾迪和帕齐，以及左侧的迈克·艾希利

尼科尔斯是一家具有重大潜力的标志性机构，但需要进行实质性的变革。”

他表示，扭转局面将涉及“将哈维·尼科尔斯整合到我们现有的奢侈品生态系统中” —— 这引发了人们对总部职位和门店未来的新担忧。

零售专家乔纳森·德·梅洛 (Jonathan De Mello) 预计，一些表现不佳的地区店铺可能会关闭，或被重新品牌化为 House of Fraser 或 Flannels 门店。

他表示：“这家企业需要进行彻底的改革，主要是围绕赢回客户。这将需要时间和精力，但 Frasers 似乎打算长期持有。”

该公司此前曾表示，潜在买家需要投资高达 6000 万英镑m 才能恢复其往日的辉煌。

高街时尚连锁店 Next 在今年夏天早些时候撤回了兴趣，而据报道一些私募股权公司参与了收购谈判。

骑士桥门店于 1889. 年开业。它在 1991 年被潘以 5300 万英镑m 的价格买下，并于 1996 年上市，随后在 2003 年私有化。

在 20 世纪 90 年代的鼎盛时期，其粉丝包括戴安娜王妃和其他“斯隆游侠” (Sloane Rangers)，并且在由乔安娜·卢姆利 (Joanna Lumley) 和詹妮弗·桑德斯 (Jennifer Saunders) 主演的电视喜剧《绝对时尚》(Absolutely Fabulous) 中被频繁提及。

该店的创意总监玛丽·波塔斯 (Mary Portas) 将其打造为一个时尚的目的地，并设有引人注目的橱窗展示。

但该店已连续五年未能盈利。Frasers 去年实现了 5.28 亿英镑m 的利润。

从梅登黑德到梅费尔：大迈克的帝国

收购哈维·尼克斯（Harvey Nicks）让迈克·艾希利（Mike Ashley）获得了一颗英国商业街的皇冠明珠。

这位运动服大亨自1982年在梅登黑德开设第一家店——迈克·艾希利体育用品店（Mike Ashley Sports，后更名为Sports Direct）以来，已经走过了很长一段路。

该店迅速扩张，凭借“大量堆积，低价销售”的廉价装备销售策略获得了丰厚回报。

随后，艾希利开始通过收购 Lonsdale 和 Dunlop 等家喻户晓的品牌来扩大其品牌范围，目前其业务涵盖了销售运动装、自行车和奢侈时尚的零售商。

该集团于2007年在伦敦证券交易所上市。2012年，它收购了奢侈时尚连锁店 Flannels 约一半的股份，随后在2017年将其余部分全部收购。

在 House of Fraser 百货连锁店崩溃后，艾希利在2018年以9000 万英镑m的价格将其收购。

整个集团在2019年从 Sports Direct International 更名为 Frasers Group。

2021年，艾希利在竞购倒闭的 Debenhams 时失败，败给了曼彻斯特巨头 Boohoo。

近年来，他追求奢侈品路线，收购了萨维尔街的裁缝店 Gieves & Hawkes。

上个月，Frasers 披露持有英国时尚品牌 Burberry 4%的股份，并且持有 Mulberry 37%的股份。它还试图收购德国时尚品牌 Hugo Boss 的剩余股份，目前持有该品牌30%以上的股份。

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里夫斯的乖戾回归

自从基尔·斯塔默（Kerr Starmer）完蛋的消息变得明确以来，瑞秋·里夫斯（Rachel Reeves）的沉默震耳欲聋。

然而，就在此时，这位前财政大臣在八月的酷暑中出现在社交媒体上，声称对一个在第二季度实现了0.4pc增长的经济体所实现的“稳定、投资和改革”拥有所有权。

英国有望在2026年与美国并列为增长最快的G7国家。

现实情况是，这种飞跃是在里夫斯的管理之下实现的，而她的管理导致消费者和企业被£75bn的新税收以及安吉拉·雷纳（Angela Rayner）破坏性的就业改革所拖累。

英国在没有采取里夫斯那种向布鲁塞尔示好的“疗法”的情况下，继续表现优于欧洲同行。

安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）和他的财政大臣约翰·希利（John Healey）有了一个良好的开端。伯纳姆擅长将棘手的遗产转化为让人们感觉更好的成果。

信心至关重要，而斯塔默和里夫斯关于英国危急状态的僵硬陈述（并回顾了利兹·特拉斯时期的混乱）散发着悲观情绪。

与其发挥英国的优势

Alex Brummer

城市编辑

• 一个蓬勃发展的服务业、充满活力的科技产业和非凡的创造力——里夫斯却坚持认为增长的解决方案是建房，这无异于押注了一匹慢马。

事实上，伯纳姆应该降低他对经济适用房和公用事业国家控制的痴迷。

此类措施将增加本已紧张的资产负债表的负担，而不是鼓励必要的扩张以降低赤字和债务。

同样，伯纳姆和希利是时候停止对生活成本危机的冷嘲热讽了。

认为霍尔木兹海峡的僵局会导致全球经济停滞并让我们所有人变成穷人的看法是错误的。实际工资正在上涨，而且正如预算责任办公室（OBR）所指出的，福利金不必要地与平均收入挂钩。

过去三个月的产出数据分解告诉我们重点应该放在哪里。几乎所有的增长都来自服务业。投资增长了1.2%，其中信息通信技术（ICT）和设备表现强劲。这更有理由让财政大臣加倍支持公司税的全额费用化，以便将数字经济、网络安全和人工智能完全纳入其中。

制造业表现落后。导致原生钢生产停滞的绿色议程在其中扮演了某种角色。

要振兴建筑业，需要认识到上市房屋建筑商是实现目标的关键。

尽管印花税减免和“购房帮扶”（Help to Buy）计划存在缺陷，但它们推动了增长。英国的韧性不应被质疑。没有任何经济体能在就业法变更等导致企业成本增加数十亿的路障面前长期繁荣。

希利将预算案提前一个月至October 28. 财政大臣不必成为那个偷走圣诞节的格林奇。他应该考虑审慎的减税，例如针对股票和住房的印花税，以增强增长。

激进的福利削减而非财富税，将为复苏提供支撑。

Pour the Bolly

谁能想到，作为英国奢侈品购物典范的哈维·尼科尔斯（Harvey Nichols）最终会落入迈克·阿什利（Mike Ashley）之手？

在线购物、能源账单、房产税和不断上升的雇佣成本，意味着这家连锁店变成了一项负债。

正如经常发生的情况那样，迈克·阿什利及其女婿迈克尔·默里（Michael Murray）作为最后的买家出手，以4000 万英镑m的价格买下了著名的骑士桥旗舰店和五家区域门店。

阿什利的所有权并不总是顺风顺水，正如2023-24年对Matches的收购及其迅速进入破产管理所显示的那样。

从榨干了所有价值的私募股权基金手中购买，与从专业的破产管理人手中进行纯粹的购买是不同的。这是默里旨在增强品牌选择和利润的“提升”战略的又一次助力。

Slam dunk

洛杉矶湖人队篮球俱乐部以惊人的$12.5bn的价格出售给一个包括前迪士尼老板鲍勃·艾格（Bob Iger）和乔什·库什纳（Josh Kushner）在内的财团，这应该让英超和欧洲足球俱乐部的所有者们欣喜若狂。

被妥善货币化的足球是伟大的、且仍具投资价值的资产之一。

富裕购物者推动 BIRKENSTOCK 利润增长

由于富裕购物者抢购昂贵的凉鞋，BIRKENSTOCK 上调了年度预测。截至6月底的三个月内，销售额增长13%至6.145 亿英镑m，超过了分析师预期的6.09 亿英镑m。

这家由鞋匠约翰内斯·比肯斯托克（Johannes Birkenstock）在250 years ago创立的企业表示，其封闭趾鞋的需求正处于繁荣期。

其售价£150的绒面革“Boston”鞋的名人粉丝包括肯德尔·詹娜（Kendall Jenner）和凯蒂·霍姆斯（Katie Holmes）。此前，其凉鞋在由玛格特·罗比（Margot Robbie）主演的2023年电影《芭比》中出现，引发了巨大的需求。

该公司在所有地区均实现增长，其中亚太地区增长18%，欧洲、中东和非洲地区增长15%，尽管伊朗的冲突压低了其他品牌的消费支出。

Birkenstock 的利润增长15%至1650 万英镑m。

这家德国公司目前预计年度营收将增长15%，而之前的指导预期在13%至15%之间。

伯纳姆攻击英国博彩公司引发强烈反弹

工党正面临日益严重的强烈反弹，此前该党对博彩业发起攻击，而行业负责人则警告称这将导致网站关闭和岗位流失。

Ladbrokes和Coral的所有者Entain的负责人Stella David表示，蕾切尔·里夫斯（Rachel Reeves）在4月份将远程游戏税从21%大幅且令人失望地提高到40%，将产生“巨大影响”。

Mecca宾果大厅和Grosvenor赌场背后的公司表示，在安迪·伯纳姆（Andy Burnham）政权下，对该行业进一步加税将迫使场馆倒闭。

根据里夫斯的计划，在线体育博彩的征税额将在4月份从15%提高到25%。

尽管他已被解雇，但伯纳姆在宣布加强对开设博彩店相关规则的管控后，再次提出了发起新一轮冲击的可能性。

他在概述拯救英国“空心化”商业街的提案时，将此类场所与电子烟店以及“与有组织犯罪相关的可疑企业”相提并论，从而引发了愤怒。

作者：Hugo Duncan

David强调，其店铺受到社区的“重视”，并表示店铺数量正在下降，Ladbrokes今年在爱尔兰共和国和北爱尔兰关闭了45家店。

“深受喜爱的宾果大厅将关闭”

在Entain上个月宣布计划削减500个工作岗位后，她概述了蕾切尔·里夫斯强加的远程游戏税上涨所带来的成本。

她说：“现在还处于非常早期的阶段，但税收变化将产生巨大影响。数额可能会在2.5 亿英镑m左右。”

Mecca和Grosvenor品牌背后的Rank Group首席执行官Richard Harris表示：“反博彩活动人士提出的税收提案继续给这个受监管的行业蒙上阴影，而该行业一直以支持全国就业并为数百万人提供优质款待体验而感到自豪。Rank去年缴纳了超过2.25 亿英镑m的税款和规费。”

“对于像我们这样监督水平高且利润率低的俱乐部来说，税收增加将迅速导致税收收入减少，因为深受喜爱的宾果大厅和赌场将被迫关闭，从而影响当地社区的客户。”

William Hill的所有者Evoke本周表示，由于受到税收打击，该公司已关闭了超过五分之一的博彩店。

博彩与游戏委员会（Betting and Gaming Council）的数据显示，自去年预算案做出调整以来，已有超过540家店铺关闭，导致4,500个工作岗位流失。

作者：Angharad Carrick

由于与中东冲突导致的高成本和供应问题作斗争，捷豹路虎（JLR）的销售额难以恢复。

该公司表示，由于销售额骤降，截至6月的三个月内营收为60亿英镑，同比下降9.6pc。

由印度塔塔（Tata）拥有的JLR

邮报财经 (Mail Finance)

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*利率报价基于 2026, 年 7 月，一名 66 岁男性，拥有 £150k 养老金，提取了 25% 的免税现金，并伴有某些医疗状况。Associated Newspapers Limited（以 Mail Finance 名义经营）是 Penso Limited 的指定介绍代表，地址为 1 Derwent House, Richmond Business Park, Sidings Court, Lakeside, Doncaster DN4 5HL。Penso Ltd 受英国金融行为监管局 (FCA) 授权并监管，编号为 231629。

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66

每日邮报

赛马

纽伯里 (NEWBURY) (B)

3.00 QUART, DOWN APPRENTICE HANDICAP (S) (F) 增加 1,000 (C), 3,767.1m (R) (S)

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田径：欧洲锦标赛

每日邮报体育

67

基利轻松晋级决赛

她的对手意外摔倒

在充满戏剧性的一个下午，基利·霍金森 (KEELY HODGKINSON) 继续冲击欧洲 800 米三连冠，而她的主要对手奥德丽·韦罗 (Audrey Werro) 在比赛中摔倒——随后被恢复资格进入决赛。

霍金森曾在 2022 和 2024, 年获得欧洲 800 米金牌，她在第二场半决赛中以 1 分 57.38 秒夺冠，顶住了彭克·布罗德斯-博尔 (Pemke Broeders-Bol) 的压力，顺利晋级今晚本周最受期待的赛事之一。

这场比赛比第一场半决赛要平静得多，后者在韦罗摔倒在最后一个弯道之前一直由她主导。

韦罗在跌倒后重新站起，踉跄着冲过终点线。经过成功的申诉，这位持有今年世界领先成绩的 22 岁选手将出现在起跑线上。

霍金森对避开混乱感到宽慰，并表示：“你不能担心发生在别人身上的事情，但我希望她没事。”

“又是 1.57, 所以我很开心。这种刺激感让我兴奋。我热爱挑战，希望比赛过程顺利，没有摔倒，也没有风。”

韦罗在 6 月的布莱克霍林钻石联赛中击败霍金森，创下了历史第三快的时间，并且在她的半决赛中从一开始就处于领先地位，状态惊人，直到接近主直道时发生了令人震惊的转折。

最初的回放似乎显示这位瑞士选手拍到了自己的腿，但一个新的角度揭示了她的右脚与法国选手安娜伊斯·布尔古安 (Anais Bourgoin) 的左手之间发生了轻微接触，影响了韦罗的步幅。

“直到最后一刻我感觉都非常好，但不幸的是发生了某些事情，一秒钟后我就在地面上了，”韦罗说道。

组织者的一份声明确认，恢复资格的原因是韦罗和布尔古安之间发生了“无意接触”。他们补充道：“该事件导致两名运动员韦罗和（加比雅）加尔维迪特 (Galvydyte) 摔倒。在审查情况后，裁判决定根据适用规则让两名运动员晋级。”

苏格兰选手杰玛·里基 (Jemma Reekie) 利用韦罗失误的机会率先冲线，以 1:58.61 的成绩晋级。

“这表明在锦标赛比赛中任何事情都可能发生，我很庆幸自己足够警觉能够绕开，”她说。“我听到有人摔倒了，但我不知道是谁，我只专注于冲向终点线。那是一次无忧无虑的

保罗·马丁 (PAUL MARTIN)

在伯明翰

杰玛。我没有恐慌。我对此感到非常自豪，因为那真的非常艰难，而且有人摔倒了。由于经历过摔倒，我知道那会给人带来多大的干扰，所以我只是尽量保持冷静。

对于这位 28 岁的选手来说，这标志着她重返重大锦标赛决赛，令人欣慰。自从在 2024 奥运会半决赛阶段出局后，她经历了一段艰难的时期。

“在过去的几年里，我遇到了类似于体操中的‘twistles’（心理障碍）的情况，”她说。

“我对半决赛产生了心理障碍，这与在巴黎的失望经历有关。但我们已经打破了这一点，所以希望我可以尽情奔跑。”

“这将是一场精彩的决赛。对我来说，这将是重新回到那些女孩们的竞争行列中的一个巨大跳板。”

在其他方面，摩根·莱克（Morgan Lake）很高兴能从英联邦运动会的失望中反弹，成功获得女子跳高决赛的一个名额。

这位 28 岁的国家纪录保持者在 17, 岁时首次亮相，这是她第六次参加欧洲锦标赛。在格拉斯哥，她未能通过 1.82m 的三次尝试，但对助跑的调整使得她在亚历山大体育场表现大有改观。她通过了 1.91m 的第三次尝试，锁定了明天决赛的一席之地，并希望最好的表现尚未到来。

“我觉得这是一个对我至关重要的时刻，”她说。“整个赛季我一直觉得，‘我知道我的状态很好，但我不知道为什么表现不出来’。”

“在英联邦运动会和这次比赛之间，我们对我的助跑做了一些调整，结果就顺畅了，产生了巨大的影响。英联邦运动会表现得非常糟糕，所以这次必须成功，这是唯一的选择。进入决赛是第一步。”

电视转播：女子 800 米决赛，晚上 9.45，BBC One 直播。

贝弗利 (BEVERLEY)

2.15 — NOT MY TYPE (T Marquand) 6-42nd(Fav) 1. Empress Princess 12-2. Flower Fountain 28-1 1 2. 6 ran. (M doggie) 1 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate 2.50. 1 / 20. 2.50. Ex. 3.75. 1. 18.00. CSF: 13.51.

2.45 — CONCERT PITCH (B Rajkumar) 8-1(F) 1. Lady Mary 15-22nd(Fav) 2. Mrs. Miss 12-1 1 3. 10 ran. (B Elman) 2 / 4. 2 / 4. Tate 1.50. 1.10. 1.70. 2.50. Ex. 4.90. 7℃. 28.19. TT. 37.30. CSF: 4.97.

3.10 — GIRLS OF GOLD (W Yule) 11-2. Court Legend 8-1 2. Ariane Sky owner 7. 10 ran. (Craig Libbert) 2 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate 6.50. 2.20. 1.20. 1.30. Ex. 54.00. 7℃. 85.81. TT. 109.40. CSF: 68.52. NR. Camel And Blues.

3.45 — SHAZANE (L Edmunds) 3-2 1. Cat To Action 18-1 2. Caution 18-1 3. 10 ran. (B Bowery) 1 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 4.50. 1.60. 4.00. 2.70. Ex. 51.40. 7℃. 527.10. TT. 410.20. CSF: 58.22. NRs. Ingleby Archie, Squeeze.

4.15 — MARGLAIR (L Morris) 11-8F 1. Grey Table 3-1 2. Mr. Moonshine 9-42nd(Fav) 3. 5 ran. (Br M Prescott).

4% hd. Tate: 2.30. 1.30. 1.60. Ex. 6.50. TT. 11.10. CSF: 6.11. NR. Sickard&Screw. 4.45 — SARDIN GRACE (Shane Grey) 6-5F 1. Copper And Fine 8-1 2. Back From Sides 10-2 2 3. 10 ran. (B Bowery) 4 / 4. 4. 2. Tate: 2.20. 1.10. 1.90. 2.10. Ex. 6.60. 7℃. 39.81. TT. 40.50. CSF: 8.74.

Jackpot (1) 11-10. 12-pot (3) 60. 林菲尔德 (LINGFIELD) 3.20 — ALICE DE CLARE (J Peale) 11-1. Barbary Boy 9-2 2. Kearman 4-1(4)2nd(Fav) 2. Tate. (J Parthenon) 1 / 4. Tate: 4.00. 1.70. 2.50. 1.50. Ex. 41.30. 7℃. 140.62. TT. 225.60. CSF: 35.81. NR. Kugler, Alive. 3.55 — HUMA BAREE (C Shepherd) 3-1(2)nd(Fav) 1. Brookstreak 9-2 2. Alison owner 3. 11 ran. (C Johnston) 1 / 4. 2. Tate: 4.00. 1.50. 1.50. 1.10. Ex. 22.60. 7℃. 7.20. CSF: 17.00. NR. Brownshahawk. 4.29 — SPUT ELEVORS (J Callan) 7-2(2)nd(Fav) 1. Spirit Of Break 8-1 2. Cherla 8-1 1 3. 12 ran. (J Butler) 1 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 4.00. 1.50. 2.00. 2.70. Ex. 50.50. 7℃. 167.39. TT. 259.60. CSF: 25.80. NR. Lawson.

赛马结果

6.58 — MY MATE MACKLEY (C Bishop) 3-1(2)nd(Fav) 1. Pure Passion 10-2. Zataria 12-6F 2. 4 ran. (Adam Kirk) 2 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 4.00. 1.50. 2.00. Ex. 41.30. 7℃. 140.62. TT. 61.90. CSF: 42.43. NR. Ex. 63.

7.24 — DORF MALE (R Hanks) 11-8F 1. Walking On Stars 7-2(2)nd(Fav) 2. Shangel La 4-1 3. 9 ran. (J & T Zataria) 1 / 4. 2. Tate: 2.30. 1.20. 1.30. 1.40. Ex. 6.90. 7℃. 20.10. CSF: 6.50.

7.24 — DOLTAK DAVIUS (D Kearman) 12-1. Beautiful Effort 13-2. Viking Banks 10-1 3. 9 ran. (M Botto) 1 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 13.80. 3.30. 3.00. 3.00. Ex. 120.00. 7℃. 972.94. TT. 1369.00. CSF: 68.73. NR. American Psycho. Pleasant 234.20. 12-pot (3) 10.

GALLISBURY 5.20 — THIGECOLLISBURUN Burdette Champion 3-2 1. Sydney Hole 11-8F 2. Kimoko Story 13-8(2)nd(Fav) 3. 6 ran. (J S Moore) 1 / 4. 2 / 4. Tate: 6.10. 2.00. 1.40. Ex. 13.70. 7℃. 21.30. CSF: 11.14. NR. Decalogue.

赛马结果

6.04 — FLOODING (O Murphy) owner 1. Tians Time 11-10(2nd(Fav) 2. All Angels 10-1 3. 9 ran. (M Botto) 1 / 4. 2 / 4. Tate: 2.00. 1.10. 1.30. Ex. 2.10. 7℃. 2.50. 1.50.

6.34 — REFORMATION (O Murphy) 8-42nd(Fav) 1. Sennett's 9-3F 2. 3 ran. (A Bolding) 2. Tate: 3.20.

7.24 — SMINA STORM (R Shyeman) 2-3F 1. Candy 8-1(2)nd(Fav) 2. Orchard Hatches 18-1 3. 4 ran. (E Wolter) 1 / 4. Tate: 1.40. Ex. 2.50. TT. 6.90. CSF: 2.50. NR. Canter's Road.

7.24 — MURTYWOODING (A Redman) 9-2.1. Glorious 14-1 2. Livemithlight 14-1 3. 7 ran. (A Bolding) 2 / 4. 2 / 4. Tate: 3.00. 2.40. 5.00. Ex. 52.70. 7℃. 653.70. TT. 509.40. CSF: 62.74. NR. Michl 7.60.

6.04 — SUPPLICATE (J Mitchell) 11-8(2nd(Fav) 1. Sudbury Hill 8-1 2. On The End 20-1 3. 4 ran. (R Hanks) 2 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 2.30. Ex. 9.50. TT. 32.80. CSF: 11.06. NRs. Akira, Minerva, Storm Point. Pleasant 1130.70. 12-pot 694.60.

温莎 (WINDSOR)

5.38 — MADMAN (David Egan) 8-1 1. Dark Alley 40-1 2. Maid in Devon 3-1F 3. 11 ran. (R Cook & J Bridger) 2 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 7.00. 1.90. 10.00. 1.70. Ex. 264.80. 7℃. 882.17. TT. 1831.40. CSF: 228.79.

6.11 — WETHGAL (P Didelot) 10-2(2)nd(Fav) 1. Lyding Boy 10-1 2. LegendwithIsland 9-2 3. 11 ran. (S Cranley) 1 / 4. 2nd. Tate: 4.34. 1.20. 3.40. 2.00. Ex. 47.50. 7℃. 193.40. CSF: 68.50. 7℃. 44.21. NR. Pye.

4.41 — COLOUBRAND (H Deves) 12-6F 1. Knights Gold 8-1 2. Sigmoodle City 10-2 3. 8 ran. (S & E Cranley) 2 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 2.60. 1.20. 2.50. 2.40. 1 / 4. 1 / 4. 70. 7℃. 66.60. TT. 95.80. CSF: 18.00.

7.11 — WATERFORD CASTLE (B Loughland) 4-6F 1. Partying 11-8(2)nd(Fav) 2. Sergei Breeze 24-1 3. 8 ran. (G Boughey) 1 / 4. 1 / 4. Tate: 1.70. 1.10. 1.30. Ex. 2.10. TT. 8.30. CSF: 1.67.

7.41 — CITY OF POETS (R Hanks) 4-1(2)nd(Fav) 1. Lee Court 5-1 2. 6. Major Pteye 10-3F 3. 8 ran. (J Tate) 2 / 4. Tate: 5.60. 1.70. 1.80. 1.40. Ex. 27.40. 7℃. 73.18. TT. 71.80. CSF: 24.47.

8.11 — ARAWALLI (Taylor Clyde) 11-2. Roller Man 8-1 2. Mythological Star 6-5F 2. 4 ran. (J Today) 1 / 4. 2 / 4. Tate: 6.50. Ex. 39.60. TT. 78.50. CSF: 36.90. Pleasant 235.00. 12-pot (3) 10.

练马师（过去 14 天）M Pleasant 3 匹参赛马获 2 场胜利 (67%); C Appleby 24 匹中获 10 场 (42%); Harry Charlton 8 匹中获 3 场 (38%); H Candy 6 匹中获 2 场 (33%).

骑师 C R Lyons 5 匹中获 2 场 (40%); Oisin Orr 33 匹中获 11 场 (33%); Hector Crouch 28 匹中获 9 场 (32%); Grace McEntee 7 匹中获 2 场 (29%).

每日邮报赛马服务

英国 / 爱尔兰评论与结果

09016 09 29 39

获取赛马建议请致电

09016 09 53 39

每年仅限一名 65g 人员。导师公司网络访问费。 试用信息更新于：Town daily, 1P. Spoke, Hwy. 1503 272-1008.

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68

每日邮报体育

板球

作者：理查德·吉布森 (Richard Gibson)

他已经超越了他那著名的父亲。现在，他准备好挑战更多英格兰全能球员的传奇地位。

周二，在庆祝 18 岁生日四个月后，洛基·弗林托夫 (Rocky Flintoff) 拿到了他的职业生涯首个百分，超越了父亲安德鲁 (Andrew)——后者在 19 岁时达到三位数得分，并在 20. 岁时参加了测试赛。弗林托夫在兰开夏郡对阵萨默塞特郡的比赛中，用 65 个球完成了百分，随后得分增加至 76 球 123 分。这次摧枯拉朽的表现，为今天在主场对阵本·斯托克斯 (Ben Stokes) 和达勒姆队的单日杯四分之一决赛铺平了道路。

在过去两年中，随着又一项卓越击球里程碑的达成，大卫·劳埃德 (David Lloyd) 认为历史应当重演。劳埃德在 1998, 年弗林托夫父辈对阵南非队时担任英格兰队教练。

“巴姆布尔 (Bumble)”为兰开夏郡在汤顿以 174 分之差获胜的比赛担任电台评论员，并指出弗林托夫在击球时的动作与他父亲“非常相似”。他特别注意到，一个短臂猛击的拉球动作尤为抢眼。

“我认为他可以被快速培养。他具备了一切，”劳埃德说。“当你观察一名球员时，你必须判断他们将达到什么样的标准。”

“英格兰队近年来在识别天才并挖掘、推动他们前进方面做得相当不错。他们也可以对弗林托夫这样做。”

事实上，就在 19 岁的安德鲁·弗林托夫在南安普顿的一场郡冠军赛对阵汉普郡队击出 117 分整整一年后，他在特伦特桥球场完成了对阵艾伦·唐纳德 (Allan Donald)、肖恩·波洛克 (Shaun Pollock) 和雅克·卡利斯 (Jacques Kallis) 的首秀。

在刚满 20, 岁几天后，他以在英格兰狮队对阵肯尼亚的一场低分胜局中击出百分开启了 1998 年，并从那个夏天起进入了单日赛队伍。

就这一点而言，洛基可以说走得更远，他击出 10 个四分球和 7 个六分球，帮助兰开夏郡队在他们的比赛中达到了 443 分 6 wicket —— 这是他们历史上最好的 List A 总分。

父子如出一辙：弗林托夫庆祝他在兰开夏郡对阵萨默塞特郡的比赛中获得百分

盖蒂图片社 (GETTY IMAGES)

洛基

大显身手

小弗林托夫已打破其父纪录……现在斯托克斯成了他的目标

A组第二名，并为今天在曼彻斯特对阵斯托克斯所属的达勒姆队的八强之战做好了准备。

十八个月前，他在一场对阵澳大利亚板球协会十一人的巡回赛中成为了英格兰狮队最年轻的百分球员，打破了其父亲的纪录。此前，罗基（Rocky）在2024年夏天对阵斯里兰卡队的比赛中，以16岁102天的年龄成为了英格兰U19队最年轻的触及三位数得分球员。

然而，身体问题显然是家族遗传。背部压力性骨折阻碍了弗雷迪在成年组比赛初期的发展，而罗基则因骨盆压力性骨折而被禁止投球。

由于只能发挥其两项技能中的一项，这意味着他在2026赛季开始时，仅是兰开夏郡县锦标赛十一人的第二候补击球手。

而当顶端六人的持续失利可能在两年内为他提供一次参加一级比赛的机会时，他正因执行英格兰U19队的任务而缺席。

不过，在找回状态后，当兰开夏郡处于倒数第二的第二组赛季于下周恢复时，他不太可能继续在俱乐部的二队中蹉跎。

首先，他有机会与斯托克斯正面交锋。斯托克斯的出现为单日杯（One-Day Cup）赛事增添了光彩；尽管由于“百球赛”（the Hundred）的存在，该赛事被视为二流，但它在英国的郡级追随者中依然大受欢迎。

35岁的斯托克斯如果不是选择在今年夏天这段时间休息，以便在宣布令人意外的国际赛退役前为测试赛保留体力，他无疑能获得一份丰厚的“百球赛”薪水。

由于只有进入“百球赛”选秀系统的人员才能参加，这使他与国内次顶尖的白球板球运动员交手，并让一些新兴天才领略到一位真正的现代伟大球员的技巧。

上周，斯托克斯大肆进攻，在面对包括20岁的查理·贝内特（Charlie Bennett）和21岁的麦肯齐·琼斯（Mackenzie Jones）在内的埃塞克斯队进攻线时，用27个球拿下了43分。

在斯托克斯以51球不败拿下73分的萨塞克斯队中，包括18岁的弗雷迪·普莱斯（Freddie Price）。另一名青少年詹姆斯·明托（James Minto）在那场比赛中为达勒姆队担任开局投球手。

英格兰和威尔士板球委员会（ECB）的50轮比赛促进了国内最顶尖新兴天才的发展。其中，有一个成名人物正继续创造属于自己的名声。

电视转播：兰开夏郡 对 达勒姆，上午7点，兰开夏郡板球YouTube账号直播。

盖伊回归后颗粒无收

英格兰开局击球手埃米利奥·盖伊（Emilio Gay）在代表职业郡俱乐部精选十一队对阵巴基斯坦队的比赛中，以12球0分（duck）为下周在海丁利举行的首场测试赛做准备。盖伊七天前在为达勒姆队参加的一场单日比赛中因肩部问题受伤退赛，这是他退赛后的首次击球，他被穆罕默德·阿巴斯（Mohammed Abbas）击中球门，被第二滑击球手萨尔曼·阿加（Salman Agha）低位接球出局。

随后，阿巴斯将另一位今年夏天英格兰测试赛首秀球员詹姆斯·雷（James Rew）淘汰，后者仅得4分，在尝试击球时被门后接球出局。

但萨塞克斯开局击球手汤姆·海恩斯（Tom Haines）以30球50分予以回应，米德尔塞克斯全能球员卡莱布·法尔科纳（Caleb Falconer）、北安普顿郡的赛义夫·扎伊布（Saif Zaib）以及萨里队10号马修·费舍尔（Matthew Fisher）也分别获得了半个世纪（50分以上）的成绩，其中费舍尔在总分305分的比赛中仅用53球就拿下了62分不败。阿巴斯和穆罕默德·阿里（Mohammad Ali）均以三个三击球（wickets）结束。巴基斯坦队周三参观了位于贝肯汉姆板球俱乐部对面、水晶宫训练场的设施，在不失球的情况下以44分结束。

劳伦斯·布斯（LAWRENCE BOOTH）

乔恩又陷入了麻烦

在欧洲高尔夫管理层收紧关于球员在不同巡回赛之间跳槽的规定后，乔恩·拉姆（Jon Rahm）在赖德杯（Ryder Cup）的未来再次变得不确定。

DP世界巡回赛（DP World Tour）最近向包括拉姆在内的两个巡回赛成员发出警告，称如果他们在冲突的赛事中参赛，下赛季很可能会面临罚款。

对于包括拉姆在内的一批LIV叛逆者来说，这些制裁在2026年被搁置，前提是他们同意结算已产生的罚款。就拉姆而言，这意味着要支付近£200 万，但由于他此前指责DP世界巡回赛是在进行“敲诈”，因此

高尔夫

看到他如何应对该措施在2027年的重新引入将会非常有趣。如果他退出LIV，这可能就成了一个无关紧要的问题，因为这位西班牙人正考虑在合同到期前两年离开。如果他留在LIV（明年最多只有10场赛事，且奖金规模小得多），他每次参赛都面临被DP世界巡回赛处以六位数罚款的风险。拒绝支付可能会让他失去巡回赛会员资格以及参加明年赖德杯的资格。

里亚斯·阿尔-萨马莱（RIATH AL-SAMMARRAI）

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Page 69

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18+ GambleAware

需选择加入。仅适用于赛前BuildABets。最高投注额有所不同。综合最低赔率需在3 / 1 (4.0) 或更高。失败项作废，剩余项的奖金将予以结算。最少5+项。仅限现金投注。适用资格限制及进一步的条款与条件。

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70 Daily Mail Sport FOOTBALL

维拉的巨人新星已让自己冲到队列最前列

BRIAN MADJO 仅用了17分钟就改变了阿斯顿维拉对即将到来的赛季的展望。在这段时间里，他欺负了世界上最好的防守球员之一威廉·帕乔（Willan Pacho），并让马尔基尼奥斯（Marquinhos）也感到惊恐。

他有六次射门尝试，并攻入了或许是最困难的一球——在智胜帕乔后的一记远端凌空抽射。面对巴黎圣日耳曼，这对任何中锋来说都是一个相当不错的夜晚。而对于一名进行正式比赛首秀的17岁少年来说，这让全世界都坐直了身体并开始关注。

尽管他们赢得了超级杯，但巴黎圣日耳曼的状态远未达到巅峰。然而，巴黎圣日耳曼依然是巴黎圣日耳曼。马多（Madjo）能留下这样的印象是非常令人惊叹的，他现在在争夺8月23日在布莱顿进行的英超揭幕战首发位置的竞争中处于领先地位，因为奥利·沃特金斯（Ollie Watkins）直到本周末才会回到球队。

马多和同样表现出色的年轻队友乔治·海明斯（George Hemmings）提升了维拉公园球场周围的气氛。

尽管支持者完全信任主帅埃梅里（Unai Emery），但他们对欧足联的财务规则感到沮丧，这些规则实际上迫使他们出售了摩根·罗杰斯（Morgan Rogers）、尤里·蒂莱曼斯（Youri Tielemans）和卢卡斯·迪涅（Lucas Digne）。

由于埃兹里·孔萨（Ezri Konsa）也是阿森纳的目标，且埃米·马丁内斯（Emi Martinez）和沃特金斯直到本周末才恢复训练，一些球迷中产生了一种潜移默化的忧虑。但在萨尔茨堡的一个夜晚，马多将这种忧虑一扫而空。

他的队友怎么看？

马乔（MADJO）在1月以 £1000 万 的价格加盟维拉，但他的注册最初被拦截。这名青少年球员是卢森堡国家队成员，而国际足联（FIFA）的规定禁止 18 岁以下球员进行海外转会。

然而，维拉通过上诉推翻了该裁决，出生于伦敦北部恩菲尔德的马乔在今年夏天获得了参赛许可。

队长约翰·麦金（John McGinn）在Instagram上发布了“允许英国球员在英国比赛 #freemadjo”，这表明马乔在球队中赢得了极高的尊重。

“显然，在能够上场之前，他必须非常有耐心，”后卫泰科·明斯（Tycoe Mings）说道。“这充分说明了他的性格。他非常年轻且强壮。在心理上，他能够应对挫折。”

“他是一个很难防守的对手。我想他大约有100公斤。他是个大块头！他的潜力上限非常高。”

“他跟我们一起训练了很长时间，所以当他最终获得出场机会时，他已经准备好了。他熟悉我们的体系，知道如何压迫。我推测他观看了很多奥利·沃特金斯（Ollie Watkins）的比赛，并理解我们的打法。关于他即将面对的情况，我和他聊过几次。”

“主教练非常看重我们在无球状态下的表现，可能比有球状态下更看重。奥利是一个非常值得学习的对象，因为他的工作率以及他为球队带来的贡献。”

麦金补充道：“他（马乔）经历了很多。他有半年到一年的时间无法上场，但他处理得非常好。他

作者：汤姆·科洛莫斯（TOM COLLOMOSSE）

保持了良好的状态。在错失那些机会后，他很容易气馁，但优秀的前锋能够让自己处于那些得分位置，本赛季他将成为我们的关键球员。”

接下来的走向？

在发现马乔和海明斯（Hemmings）的潜力后，埃梅里（Emery）刻意增加了维拉季前赛的赛程。巴黎圣日耳曼（PSG）是他们夏季计划中的第七个对手，维拉将在周六对阵门兴格拉德巴赫后完成该计划。

埃梅里希望他的年轻球员能够习惯他的风格和战术要求，而从超级杯的表现来看，这个计划奏效了。

马乔目前在季前赛中打入五球，在对阵沃尔索尔（Walsall）的比赛中梅开二度，随后在对阵皇家社会和印度尼西亚全明星队的比赛中也取得了进球。

他的崛起使得维拉更有可能考虑关于塔米·亚伯拉罕（Tammy Abraham）的报价，尽管他们在仅七个月前就为这名前英格兰前锋支付了 1800 万英镑m。

维拉继续关注切尔西的尼古拉斯·杰克逊（Nicolas Jackson），并可能在本转会窗口采取行动，不过马乔的表现可能会让埃梅里思考是否还需要另外两名前锋。

尽管他曾三次代表卢森堡出战，但那仅是友谊赛，这意味着马乔仍可为英格兰队效力，他此前在 Under-17 级别代表英格兰队出场9次。预计他将被选入即将组建的年龄组国家队。

就其年龄而言，他力量强劲且热爱身体对抗。但仍有工作要做，尤其是在触球方面。

好消息是，埃梅里在提升前锋能力方面拥有卓越的记录。

在准备面对维拉之际，你猜测布莱顿主帅法比安·许策勒（Fabian Hurzeler）一定在制定计划以限制这名令人兴奋的青少年。

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足球回归，伴随 1500 场赛事

Sky Sports 是英国和爱尔兰国内俱乐部足球的播出平台，本赛季将在英超联赛（Premier League）、女子超级联赛（WSL）、英格兰足球联赛（EFL）和苏格兰超级联赛中转播超过 1,500 场现场比赛。

仅在英超联赛中，Sky Sports 就将播出至少 215 场现场比赛。该平台每周拥有首选比赛权，并将继续在多个周末的周日下午 2pm 播出多场比赛，确保整个赛季都有焦点对决。

为了帮助球员在 2026 年世界杯后恢复体能，英超联赛的开赛时间比 20 / 26 赛季晚一周。卫冕冠军阿森纳将在 8 月 21 日周五主场对阵考文垂，以此开启 2026 / 27 英超赛季，Sky Sports 将进行现场直播。这场揭幕战将由米克尔·阿尔特塔率领的枪手队——他们刚刚庆祝了 22 年来首个冠军头衔——在酋长球场于 8pm 开球迎战弗兰克·朗福德率领的冠军联赛冠军队。随后，阿森纳在接下来的两场比赛中将面临在客场挑战阿斯顿维拉以及在主场迎战哈比·阿隆索率领的切尔西等艰巨考验。

在首轮比赛中，Sky Sports 将现场直播六场英超比赛，其中包括 Ariston Inside 接手利物浦后的首场比赛。红军将于 8 月 23 日周日下午 4.30pm 开球客场挑战纽卡斯尔。随后，利物浦将在 10 月与曼城和阿森纳展开对决，并在 11 月连续对阵死敌曼联和埃弗顿。

伦敦德比布伦特福德对阵热刺（8 月 22 日周六，5.30pm）以及富勒姆对阵切尔西（8 月 24 日周一，6pm）也是首轮赛事的亮点，均由 Sky Sports 现场直播。热刺球迷——他们目睹球队在过去两个赛季分别排名第 17 位——心中也将牵挂着赛季末的艰难赛程。他们的最后五场比赛包括客场挑战阿森纳（5 月 1 日周六）、主场对阵切尔西（5 月 8 日周六）和曼联（5 月 23 日周日），而赛季最后一场比赛将于 5 月 30 日周日在客场对阵阿斯顿维拉。

曼城在没有佩普·瓜迪奥拉的新时代将于 8 月 23 日周日下午 2pm 在 Elfrast 体育场对阵伯恩茅斯拉开序幕。然而，他们与上赛季前五名的首次交手全部在客场。

冠军联赛附加赛冠军赫尔城将在 8 月 22 日周六 12.30pm 在 MKM 体育场迎来曼联，标志着其重返英超；而另一支升班马 to watch 将于 3pm 在波特曼路球场对阵桑德兰。埃弗顿对阵欧协联冠军水晶宫，以及诺丁汉森林对阵利兹联，定于 8 月 22 日周日 3pm 开球；布莱顿对阵欧联杯冠军阿斯顿维拉则定于 8 月 23 日周日下午 2pm，由 Sky Sports 现场直播。

在圣诞节和新年期间，俱乐部在两场比赛之间将至少有 60 小时的休息时间。这符合向俱乐部做出的承诺，旨在解决在扩大的国际赛程中过于拥挤的节日赛程问题。

凭借更多的现场比赛、更广泛的获取渠道和更大的灵活性，Sky Sports 将 2026 / 27 赛季定位为足球不间断之年。

本赛季在节礼日（Boxing Day）还将有更完整的英超赛程。

随着赛季于 5 月 30 日周日结束，所有 10 场英超比赛将同时开球。决定性的最后一天所有比赛都将现场直播，在 2027 年欧冠决赛前一周，营造出潜在的戏剧性结局。

苏格兰超级联赛已经奠定了基调。开赛首个周末的所有六场比赛

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TENNIS / Daily Mail Sport 71

顶尖前锋将面临仲裁

利物浦和阿森纳在未能就 16 岁球员文森特·约瑟夫（Vincent Joseph）的补偿金达成一致后，将前往仲裁庭。这位备受赞赏的前锋曾代表利物浦 U18 队出场，尽管利物浦向他提供了奖学金，但他仍决定于上个月离开俱乐部。在曼联、切尔西、拜仁慕尼黑和多特蒙德等球队的关注下，他拒绝了该提议。然而，最终赢得其签名的球队是阿森纳。此后，阿森纳一直与利物浦

西蒙·琼斯（SIMON JONES）报道

就补偿金进行谈判，但双方未能找到共同点，目前准备提交仲裁。上一个离开利物浦加盟另一支英超球队的青少年球员是艾萨克·莫兰（Isaac Moran）。这位 17 岁的英格兰青年国脚于今年加盟纽卡斯尔，并在 3 月签署了职业合同。一次仲裁导致被要求支付七位数的费用，这位中场球员的结算金额有可能达到 500 万英镑。

近年来，英超天才球员的争夺战变得代价高昂且竞争残酷。利物浦去年从切尔西挖走里奥·恩古莫哈（Rio Ngumoha）时激怒了后者。这位英格兰国脚，17, 之所以转会利物浦，是因为他认为那里有更好的进入一线队足球的途径；他在 2024 年 9 月离开切尔西，并在一年后签署了他的第一份职业合同。仲裁庭决定利物浦必须为他支付 280 万英镑，该金额可能会增加到 400 万英镑。如果恩古莫哈被出售，切尔西还将获得任何利润的 20。

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SKY SPORTS 赛事直播

这些赛事进行了直播，今年整个 SPFL 将有多达 60 场比赛在 Sky Sports 播出。揭幕战中，格拉斯哥流浪者队被邓迪联队逼平，德里克·麦金内斯（Derek McInnes）执教，一名 17 岁的人在场，而圣米伦队（St Mirren）则有 17 场——麦克莱什（McLeish）的球队。阿伯丁队对阵上赛季亚军哈茨队，由 17 岁的人新晋升，以及马瑟韦尔队在欧协联，以及 17 岁的人在开赛首个周末的希伯尼安队。联赛看起来比之前更具竞争力，在戏剧性的最后一天表演之后：17 岁的人在凯尔特人的胜利中克服了 17 岁的人的挑战，凯尔特人和流浪者队将使 17 岁的人成为赛季之战，在 17 岁的人。17 岁的人住在 17 岁的人，一个 住在 17 岁的人。

那些希望升级的球队和前英超名将；您将能够选择关注冠军联赛、英甲和英乙每场比赛的故事。

九月份的 EFL 选择展示了前三场比赛的范围。斯托克城对阵诺里奇城，新 Burnley 在周中的冠军联赛赛程中迎战米德尔斯堡。伯明翰城与狼队的会面，谢菲尔德联队与狼队的碰撞，以及狼队对阵西布罗姆维奇阿尔比恩，让前焦点俱乐部和地区宿敌重新回到聚光灯下。在金字塔更低层，他们对阵 AFC 温布尔登。斯蒂文纳奇对阵诺里奇。温布尔登对阵 MK Doria。这些是通常为英乙中突出俱乐部故事预留报道的赛程。17 岁的人，17 岁的人，t 17 岁的人。

17 岁的人，17 岁的人，t 17 岁的人，17 岁的人。

凭借战胜斯托克波特郡队的胜利而获得奖杯。Sky Bet EFL 的赛程将在 Sky Sports 主频道或 Sky Sports+ 上播出，所有电视转播的赛事也可在流媒体服务 NOW 上观看。

女子足球的报道也将显著扩大。Sky Sports 计划播出 163 场 WSL 比赛，其中 108 场为独家播出。本赛季联赛规模从 12 家俱乐部扩大到 14 家。伦敦城市狮女队（London City Lionesses）将于 9 月 4 日星期五对阵曼联开启赛季。这家雄心勃勃的伦敦俱乐部在签下两届前亚历克西亚·普特利亚斯（Alexia Putellas）主教以及前英格兰洲际联队（Intercontinental United）成员后，引起了更多关注，此前曾是 Earnest。

所有球员都将保持独立，但他们不能在过去 18 个月内参赛。17 岁的人，17 岁的人，t 17 岁的人。

Crying shame：德雷珀（Draper）在蒙特利尔落败后落泪

SKY SPORTS

杰克：伤病夺走了我的斗志

在过去的18个月里，伤病魔咒摧毁了杰克·德雷珀（Jack Draper）的身体，而现在，它们正在击垮他的精神。

连续第二周，这位前世界第四在首轮失利时，身体僵硬，心态混乱，比赛状态崩溃。赛后他承认：“对我来说，情况已经发展到夺走了我最大的特质之一：我的斗志。”

目前观看德雷珀打球简直是一种折磨。天知道他本人感觉如何。他将上周在蒙特利尔输给特伦斯·阿特曼（Terence Atmane）的比赛描述为“触底”，而在昨天辛辛那提站以3-6, 5-7负于马丁·兰达卢塞（Martin Landaluce）的比赛中，很难看到多少进步。

比赛中出现了12次双误，且在第二盘5-2领先的情况下崩盘。6个盘点机会接踵而至却未能把握。背景是，德雷珀在过去16个月的大部分时间里一直在与左臂骨挫伤作斗争，而最近则是右膝腱炎。

在比赛结束时，他的左臂几乎只能勉强地将发球滚过去，而在最后两局走动时，那只膝盖几乎无法弯曲。

这与蒙特利尔站比赛结束时的情景令人沮丧地相似。如果这次没有流泪，那是因为德雷珀已经接受了这残酷的新现实。

“和上周一样：我通常能够为每一个球而奋斗的方式，现在完全消失了，”德雷珀说。“上周之后，我付出了很多努力试图打得好一点，但从内心深处来看，现在是一个很难熬的境地。”

“你在奋斗，试图让自己兴奋起来并给自己能量，

但它却在压制你。对我来说，情况已经发展到夺走了我最大的特质之一：我的斗志。”

德雷珀尝试过休息和康复。他更换了球弦和球拍——他说这是他“极不情愿做”的事情——但没有任何效果。

“没有正确答案，”他说。“有一种慢性疼痛一直伴随着你。那种疼痛开始减轻，但手臂与肘部相连。它与肱二头肌腱炎相连，与该区域周围的许多神经相连。所以当你那个区域受伤时，整条手臂就像被点亮了一样。”

“当这种情况发生在你的击球手臂上……这就是我的生活，这就是我的职业生涯，你懂吗？”

“对于普通人来说，他们可以休息六个月，然后可能会康复。事实是我在打网球，所以这不像请假休息就能解决那么简单，因为事实并非如此。我尝试过了。”

这位世界排名第143位的选手现在面临着必须参加美网资格赛的前景——而两年前，他在这项赛事中还打入了半决赛。

“这是长期挫折、挣扎和孤独给我的精神和身体带来的疲劳，”德雷珀补充道。“我从去年的位置跌落的程度，以及我在网球技术上必须改变的东西之多……这座山看起来非常、非常高。”

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72 每日邮报 体育 足球

当温文尔雅的卡里克在15分钟内请求签下新援10次时，你就知道情况变得绝望了……

MICHAEL CARRICK面带灿烂的笑容，大步走进卡顿庄园（Carton House）的一间豪华会议室。这家五星级水疗酒店本周一直是曼联的驻地。毕竟，这位曼联主帅有很多值得高兴的事情。

在家里，他的女儿路易丝（Louise）已经拿到了 A-Level 的成绩；而在爱尔兰，科比·梅努（Kobbie Mainoo）、马库斯·拉什福德（Marcus Rashford）和利桑德罗·马丁内斯（Lisandro Martinez）在世界杯后延迟归队，为这支周三在克罗克公园球场通过点球大战击败利兹联的球队注入了新的活力。

与前任鲁本·阿莫林（Ruben Amorim）不同，卡里克为人沉稳。当面对尖锐问题时，俱乐部高层知道他不会像我们之前在阿莫林身上看到的那样引起动荡——而曼联明天将在波兰面对阿莫林率领的AC米兰队，两人将再次相遇。

这就是为什么曼联很乐意向亚马逊的电影制作团队敞开大门，拍摄本赛季的《All or Nothing》幕后纪录片。

但不要将他的冷静误认为漠不关心。卡里克同样决心获胜。

“在这个夏天，切尔西、曼城和托特纳姆热刺的支出都超过了£1 亿。甚至升级的考文垂和伊普斯维奇的支出都比曼联多。”卡里克向高层传达的信息非常明确。

“不能为了买而买，但当然，我们想要进步，我们需要进步，”卡里克说道，“这确实是我们努力的目标。”

到目前为止，只有尤里·蒂勒曼斯（Youri Tielemans）、安德烈·桑托斯（Andrey Santos）和替补门将卡尔·达洛（Karl Darlow）加盟。从热刺以800 万英镑m引进的泰曼·汤普森（Tyman Thompson）则是为了未来储备。

“卡尔、安德烈和尤里正是我们所希望的，在各方面都完全符合我们的预期，”他说，“安德烈作为一个如此年轻的人，能以这种方式融入，他的性格和个性简直是理想的。”

但卡里克知道他需要更多。曼联仍然需要一名左后卫——今年夏天曾两次尝试引进纽卡斯尔的刘易斯

NATHAN SALT 发自都柏林

霍尔（Lewis Hall），但均告失败——此外还需要一名中前卫。

在这场15分钟的对话结束时，卡里克一共提到10次在转会市场上需要“发力”。

“当你审视阵容时，我们的平衡相当不错，但当然我们希望有更多，”他说，“我们需要继续争取更多。”

“我们觉得有一两个领域有提升的可能性，但这必须是我们能够实施且能让我们变得更好、提升整体水平的举措，无论是提升质量还是增加深度。”

“这是我们需要管理的事情。这很明显。”

足球总监杰森·威尔科克斯（Jason Wilcox）目前在爱尔兰，并与卡里克保持着密切沟通。考虑到他们目前在夏季转会中的节俭做法——导致曼联未能签下埃利奥特·安德森（Elliot Anderson）、摩根·罗杰斯（Morgan Rogers）等人——曼联本赛季还能在英超冠军的争夺中具有竞争力吗？

“你必须拥有信念，你必须在进入

保持冷静：但卡里克渴望提升他的阵容 GETTY IMAGES

赛季时认为我们可以取得一些特别的成就，”卡里克说道，他不愿做出任何大胆的宣言。“不要在进入一个赛季时想着这可能会是一场苦战。我们必须设定目标去真正实现某些成就。”

“我们有潜力取得真正特别的成就。我不回避这个事实，我们也应该以此为目标。”

“我不会做出任何疯狂的预测，但基于我们已经做过的事情——我一直在强调这一点——这给了我们前进的信心。我们能前进得有多快，这才是挑战。”

关于拉什福德以及他明天是否能为曼联贡献自2024,（当时阿莫林将他排除在计划之外）以来的首分钟出场时间，目前仍是一个问号。曼联长期以来一直持开放

将这名周薪 32.5 万英镑 英镑的进攻手转会，作为削减工资单计划的一部分。整个夏天，他们一直在市场上寻找一名左边锋。

巴塞罗那放弃了在拉什福德上赛季租借效力于这家西班牙冠军俱乐部后将其签下的选项，因此他回到了曼联且训练状态良好。

“马库斯是一名非常优秀的球员，如果你打算在职业生涯中坚持 10 或 15 年以上，总会有某些时刻事情会朝着不同的方向发展，”卡里克说道，他并未排除拉什福德离队的可能性。

“人生有起有伏，这不能作为一次性的评判来定义你。重要的是随着时间的推移发生了什么，现在我们作为一个团队处于积极的状态，而马库斯能为我们提供很多帮助。他（过去）做到了，而且他

你的俱乐部花费了多少

1. Chelsea / 3.486亿英镑

2. Tottenham / 2.281亿英镑
3. Man City / 1.514亿英镑
4. Arsenal / 1.508亿英镑
5. Newcastle / 1.377亿英镑
6. Nottm Forest / 1.132亿英镑
7. Ipswich / 1.092亿英镑
8. Brighton / 1.03亿英镑
9. Bournemouth / 9500万英镑
10. Coventry / 9200万英镑
11. Aston Villa / 9010万英镑
12. Liverpool / 8850万英镑 13. MAN UTD / 8310万英镑
13. Everton / 8440万英镑
14. Fulham / 7380万英镑
15. Leeds / 7150万英镑
16. Brentford / 7130万英镑
17. Hull / 6580万英镑
18. Sunderland / 4340万英镑
19. Crystal Palace / 2200万英镑

能再次做到，所以从这个角度来看，这相当令人兴奋。”

此外，迈努也将回归。卡里克整个夏天都与这位中场球员保持联系，在他参加世界杯且完全没有上场期间一直关注他的情况。

不过，目前并没有什么令人担忧的事——事实上，卡里克认为迈努已经准备好在英超联赛中大展身手。

“对我来说最重要的一点是，科比现在的状态非常好，”他补充道，“他已经回家，并为迎接一个重要的赛季做好了准备。”

但由于曼联本赛季重返欧洲赛场，球队阵容深度的问题依然存在。

当被追问曼联本赛季可能会比上赛季历史最低的 40 场比赛多踢 15 到 20 场比赛时，卡里克总结道：“我们并不天真，我们知道自己将面临什么。”

“但我们觉得现在的团队比上赛季更强大，所以我们必须充分利用这一点。”

作者：亨利·克拉克（HENRY CLARK）

最值得击败的球队将是……

很难不关注西汉姆联。铁锤帮保留了上赛季阵容的核心，包括贾罗德·鲍文，他可能会打破英冠联赛的所有进球纪录。主教练努诺·埃斯皮里托·桑托也知道如何带领球队升级，这意味着他们在夺冠热门的竞争中略胜狼队一筹。狼队的新任主帅塞萨尔·佩肖托在英国尚未经过考验，但他可以依靠经验丰富的基兰·特里皮尔以及回归的球迷宠儿劳尔·希门尼斯。

那太无聊了——有没有冷门预测？

好吧，有道理。那么在升级附加赛决赛中落败的米德尔斯堡如何？在摩根·罗杰斯以高价转会切尔西为俱乐部带来一笔丰厚收益后，他们在转会市场上表现得非常激进。

英冠回归后的关注重点

兰克希尔是那种让后卫在里弗赛德球场的寒冷夜晚面对时会感到恐惧的前锋。南安普顿由于其“间谍门”丑闻，在赛季开始时将面临 4 分的扣分，但只要他们遵守法律，应该依然能取得好成绩。此外，还要关注菲利普·克莱门特的诺维奇，他们是 2026 年该级别最强的球队。目前卡罗路球场确实有一种令人振奋的氛围。

下一个崭露头角的未知之星是谁？

穆罕默德·图雷在从丹麦兰德斯队转会至诺维奇后的首秀中上演帽子戏法，这预示着未来的前景。这位澳大利亚前锋上赛季每 58 分钟就能贡献一个进球或助攻，被拿来与马克·维杜卡相比较。同时也要关注沃特福德的奥斯曼·马马。这位摩洛哥球员拥有真正的绝活。

你应该买票观看的球队是……

雷斯考斯球场和绝杀球之间总有一种特殊的联系。对于雷克瑟姆来说，这是一个安静的夏天——自从好莱坞资本进入这座城镇以来，在球员引进方面是最安静的一次——但北威尔士永远不缺戏剧性。与此同时，沸腾的圣安德鲁斯球场是观看足球的最佳场所之一，但在经历了不尽如人意的 2025-26 赛季后，伯明翰主帅克里斯·戴维斯必须取得一个强有力的开局。

接下来的赛季对……林肯和博尔顿来说将是漫长且艰难的。 “林肯之 Imp”是上赛季英格兰足球的故事主角之一，但在今年夏天失去了主教练迈克尔·斯库巴拉（加盟布里斯托尔城）和关键球员杰克·莫伊兰（加盟加的夫）之后，这感觉像是过多了一道难以逾越的坎。而博尔顿则单纯缺乏在这个级别竞争的质量和经验。

还有谁在努力避免掉级？

今年沃特福德（WATFORD）是否终于要为他们对主教练“雇佣即解雇”的政策付出代价？如果亚莱西奥·迪奥尼西（Alessio Dionisi）能坚持到年底，那真的将是一个圣诞奇迹。内森·琼斯（Nathan Jones）上赛季在维持查尔顿（CHARLTON）不掉级方面做得不错，但他们夏季的转会操作乏善可陈，我们可能会看到他们陷入困境。托尼·莫布雷（Tony Mowbray）回到布莱克本（BLACKBURN）后同样面临艰巨的任务。

电视转播：狼队对阵布莱克本，晚上8点，天空体育足球频道（Sky Sports Football）现场直播。

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足球 / 每日邮报体育 / 73

作者：刘易斯·斯蒂尔（LEWIS STEELE）

在伯恩茅斯执教三个月后，安多尼·伊拉奥拉（Andoni Iraola）的职位稳定性已经受到了严密审查。

这位对英国球迷来说相对陌生的巴斯克主帅，在最初的9场联赛中输掉了6场，平了3场。直到10月28日他才赢得一场胜利，并在接下来的比赛中被曼彻斯特城以6-1大比分击败。外界的议论声震耳欲聋，尤其是考虑到他在夏天出人意料地取代了加里·奥尼尔（Gary O'Neil）。

但支持他成了伯恩茅斯唯一的选择，工作人员迅速否认了关于可能解雇他的报道。他们的做法是正确的，因为伊拉奥拉扭转了球队的局面。在最初9场不胜之后，他们在接下来的9场中赢了7场，仅输掉1场。他们从一艘即将沉没的破船变成了平稳航行。

但慢热成了这位利物浦新任主教练一个令人担忧的主题。

在他于塞浦路斯AEK拉纳卡（AEK Larnaca）的第一份工作中，他在1月中旬被解雇。在西班牙乙级俱乐部米兰德斯（Mirandes），伊拉奥拉在最初的10场比赛中赢了1场，平了5场，输了4场。在巴列卡诺（Rayo Vallecano）的情况稍好一些，但考虑到该俱乐部被预期将冲击升级，前11场仅获5胜并无特别之处。

在对上赛季欧协联亚军巴列卡诺以及今年将参加欧联杯的伯恩茅斯保持应有尊重的前提下，有些事情在小俱乐部是可以被容忍的，但在安菲尔德则行不通。

因此，请考虑他在上周日一场3-2负于摩纳哥的季前友谊赛后的评论。伊拉奥拉表示他的球队在前30分钟表现良好，但“就达到这种比赛水平所需的能力而言，他们没有更多了”。

就在此七天前，他们在芝加哥以4-2输给了利兹联，那场比赛呈现出类似的主题——利物浦开局良好，领先两球，在进入中场休息前状态极佳，随后崩溃并输球。

不过，这里有一个前提。除了这是季前赛，且在世界杯夏季之后有相当一部分球员尚未完全恢复体能外，利物浦在过去两场友谊赛中的上半场首发阵容与8月23日在纽卡斯尔客场进行赛季首场比赛的阵容不会太有出入。像伊拉奥拉那样在下半场撤下最优秀的球员，那么局面崩溃也就不足为奇了。

伊拉奥拉的体系对体能要求极高，季前赛的关键词是“强度”，多米尼克·索博斯洛伊（Dominik Szoboszlai）坚称“我们一直缺失的强度回来了”。球员在训练后甚至感到“恶心”，鉴于

我们没有法律可依了！

疲惫：克尔克兹（Kerkez）、范戴克（Van Dijk）和维尔茨（Wirtz）在伊拉奥拉麾下经历了一个艰苦的季前赛

PA / ALAMY / REX

伊劳拉残酷的训练让利物浦球星感到恶心且精疲力竭，但这在本赛季会带来回报吗？

新政权的艰苦性质。

球迷们批评阿尔内·斯洛特的一点就是缺乏这种强度，尽管关于球队被给予过多休息日的担忧只是个传闻。虽然他们显然失去了锐气，或许还失去了信念或努力，但他们的工作时长与赢得联赛时是一样的。

无论如何，现在情况已经改变，球员们需要一段时间来适应这种全新的、全攻全守的风格。有些人提到自己“腿已经跑空了”，但伊劳拉（右）会对那些在训练演习中失败的人进行惩罚——冲刺到球场另一端再跑回来。

上赛季，伯恩茅斯在英超联赛的直接进攻方面排名第一，在高位抢断方面排名第三，高位抢断被定义为任何在公开比赛中开始且距离对方球门 40 米或更短的控球序列。

体育科学专家西蒙·布伦迪什指出，问题在于球员重复冲刺的能力，以及在第 10 次冲刺时能否像第 1 次冲刺时那样具有爆发力。他坚持认为，这是赛季末消失最快的能力，并且需要四到八周的时间才能重新构建。

“伊劳拉的实际系统对一种特定的能力非常残酷——即以略低于全速冲刺的速度，作为一个整体共同重复运行，”布伦迪什说。“伯恩茅斯每场比赛这样跑 4.1km，

利物浦则跑了 1.4km（上赛季的平均值）。两支球队的总冲刺次数基本上相同。他们缺乏的不是速度，而是使其可重复的能力。”

球员们还需要时间在战术上适应斯洛特和伊劳拉之间的差异。

去年在接受《每日邮报》体育版采访时，伯恩茅斯前锋贾斯汀·克鲁伊维特表示：“每个人都需要一段时间来理解。他起步很艰难，输了很多场，但俱乐部相信他，我们也相信他，现在这得到了回报。他显著提高了我的比赛水平……他让我扮演一个不同的角色，所以我感谢安多尼……他有很好的远见！”

另一位前“樱桃军团”成员安托万·塞门约在 In The Mixer 播客中说：“刚开始我没意识到这一点。当他到来时，他有自己的打法，这对我们来说非常新鲜，包括他安排每周训练的方式。”

“我们几乎没有休息日，所以对于一支球队来说，从周三和周日休息转变为没有休息日是非常困难的。刚开始时非常不同。结果并不理想，球迷们说他需要被解雇。每个人慢慢习惯了这个系统，然后情况就开始好转。”

记录在案的是，伊劳拉否认了塞门约关于团队没有休息时间的说法——尽管这次在利物浦的季前训练尤其苛刻。周一从美国巡演返回后，红军在周二得到了休息，然后周三回到了训练场。

伊劳拉没有提前找任何借口，但值得关注的是，利物浦是否能像前几个赛季那样在开局阶段就势如破竹。

在尤尔根·克洛普的最后一个赛季中，红军在首六场联赛中赢了五场，平了一场。次年，斯洛特在前 13 场比赛中取得了 11 场胜利，直到 4 月初他才遭遇第二次失败。上个赛季，他们赢得了前五场比赛，看起来准备好卫冕英超冠军，但随后在剩下的 33 场比赛中仅赢了 12 场。

伊劳拉知道这个联赛是一场马拉松而非冲刺，但他也现实地意识到，在球队无论是身体还是战术上都未达到满员状态时，他必须在赛季初期取得一些胜利。

一个有趣的巧合是，直到 10 月中旬，伊劳拉将面对的每一位主教练也都是新上任的。他的前六场联赛对手分别是马蒂亚斯·贾斯勒、奥利弗·格拉斯纳、奥尼尔、阿尔瓦罗·阿尔贝罗拉、马尔科·罗斯和恩佐·马雷斯卡。

因此，利物浦现在看起来可能状态略显低迷，但他们肯定不是唯一一家，并且将希望亚历山大·伊萨克和弗洛里安·维尔茨在俱乐部的第二个赛季能有一个迅猛的开局，从而获得助力。

正如伊拉奥拉本周所说：“我想在第一天就说，我们将是完美的，每个人都会各就各位，但情况可能不会是这样。我们将不得不尽快完成这一切。”

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74 每日邮报 体育 足球

煽动者：费尔南德斯在世界杯上领唱关于马尔维纳斯群岛（Falklands）的歌曲，随后（右图）在决赛中被红牌罚下 GETTY IMAGES

丑陋游戏的面孔

如果马雷斯卡挥霍曼城的资金去签下像流氓恶棍一样的费尔南德斯，他将危及佩普辛苦建立的声誉

曼城似乎在追求切尔西的恩佐·费尔南德斯，这并不令人惊讶。在过去的几年里，这名球员已经成为了这项美丽运动中许多丑陋面的象征。

曼城的新任主教练恩佐·马雷斯卡在纵容和奖励这名阿根廷中场粗鲁且低劣的行为方面早有前科，这可以追溯到他在斯坦福桥执教时期。

两年前，马雷斯卡被迫为其在 2024-25 赛季揭幕战（对阵曼城）中选择费尔南德斯担任切尔西队长的决定进行辩护。就在一个月前，费尔南德斯发布了一段他和其它阿根廷球员嘲讽法国队种族血统的视频。切尔西队友卫斯利·福法纳将这段由费尔南德斯在

首席体育撰稿人

阿根廷在该年夏天美洲杯决赛击败哥伦比亚后上传的视频，称为“肆无忌惮的种族主义”。

费尔南德斯道歉了。而在里斯·詹姆斯缺席的情况下，马雷斯卡让他担任了队长。

费尔南德斯的所作所为既愚蠢又具有冒犯性。不要忘记，这名球员在上一赛季公开与皇家马德里调情后，被自己的俱乐部禁赛。这名球员在表现明显下滑时，还帮着让利亚姆·罗塞尼尔在切尔西被解雇。这个人在试图用各种把戏向裁判施压方面，堪称联赛中最糟糕的人之一。

这名球员在上个月对阵西班牙的世界杯决赛中被红牌罚下，而他在半决赛对阵英格兰时那些流氓般且未受惩罚的行为，引发了广泛的厌恶。

在这种情况下，且考虑到他的身价，马德里不愿靠近费尔南德斯是可以预见的。但更令人意外的是，他们采取了不同寻常的步骤，公开声明他们没有兴趣购买他。

上个月初，马德里的公报称：“俱乐部希望声明，其没有直接或间接地做出任何旨在签下上述球员的努力，且无意追求此类操作。”

但现在，上任仅两个月，马雷斯卡已经在拿曼城在佩普·瓜迪奥拉时代建立的声誉冒险。在过去十年里，曼城因其统治英超联赛的质量、风格和态度而受到广泛赞赏。

切尔西为曼城出价购买 25, 岁的费尔南德斯设定了今天下午 5 点的截止日期，并要求满足 £1.2 亿 的要价，但这起事件可能会一直延续到 9 月 1 日的转会截止日期。

瓜迪奥拉治下的曼城是拥有凯文·德布劳内和贝尔纳多·席尔瓦等天赋之星的球队。他们是罗德里、伊尔凯·京多安、杰克·格拉利什和埃尔林·哈兰德的球队。他们是一支能让任何观看他们的中立球迷露出微笑的球队。

如果购买费尔南德斯成行，将会改变这一点。费尔南德斯是一名优秀的球员，但他的质量是以他所效力球队的形象为高昂代价的。最睿智的主教练在购买质量的同时也会考量人品。

事实是，如果曼城买下费尔南德斯，这不仅代表在罗德里之后的一次降级，更是对俱乐部在瓜迪奥拉时期所代表的许多价值观的逆转。这将代表对足球丑陋一面的接纳。这将是一次代表犬儒主义的转会。这将是一个表明曼城正用美丽交换足球“黑暗艺术”的举动。

事实同样是，切尔西在 2022 年世界杯后同意向本菲卡支付 1.07 亿英镑m 时，为费尔南德斯支付了过高的费用。虽然他不像切尔西所有者 BlueCo 签下的某些球员那样彻底失败，但他出色的表现与近乎隐形的时期交替出现。

费尔南德斯本应成为球队的领袖之一，但在上赛季的一些阶段，他看起来完全不像个领袖。领袖不会与其他球队调情。领袖不会被自己的俱乐部禁赛。领袖不会允许平庸在周围蔓延。

切尔西上赛季在英超联赛中排名第10位，落后冠军阿森纳 33 分，而费尔南德斯是其中

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足球

每日邮报

体育

75

雷因德斯以5000 万英镑出售后，所有目光都集中在恩佐身上

作者：JACK GAUGHAN 和 SIMON JONES

曼彻斯特城昨晚以超过£5000 万的价格将蒂贾尼·雷因德斯（Tijjani Reijnders）出售给沙特阿拉伯球队阿尔卡迪西亚（Al Qadsiah）——这使得他们在切尔西下午5点截止日期前对恩佐·费尔南德斯（Enzo Fernandez）的兴趣成为焦点。费尔南德斯希望在今年夏天确保转会至伊蒂哈德球场，这将使他与前蓝军主帅恩佐·马雷斯卡（Enzo Maresca）再次合作。

切尔西希望就这名阿根廷国脚，25, 获得1.2 亿英镑m，并为出价设定了截止时间，以便为这场威胁要变成长篇剧集的转会画上句号。在随着雷因德斯的即将离队而腾出中场位置后，预计曼城将测试这些要求的严苛程度。雷因德斯在俱乐部仅待一年后便离开曼城，他是去年夏天以4650 万英镑m从AC米兰签下的。他最初给人留下了深刻印象，但难以适应英超联赛的身体对抗，在佩普·瓜迪奥拉（Pep Guardiola）麾下的首发机会寥寥无几。

这名28岁的荷兰人在昨天缺席了曼城的训练课后，同意加盟由布伦丹·罗杰斯（Brendan Rodgers）执教的沙特阿拉伯俱乐部。据了解，诺丁汉森林队也对他感兴趣。

鉴于费尔南德斯的一系列争议，曼城对他表现出的兴趣在支持者中引起了分歧。但马雷斯卡坚持认为球队需要更多经验，而四年前在卡塔尔赢得世界杯冠军的费尔南德斯符合这一要求。与此同时，曼城和巴塞罗那继续就中场球员罗德里（Rodri）的转会费进行讨论。

曼城拒绝了这家西甲冠军俱乐部最新提供的约5500 万英镑m报价，因为他们希望这位西班牙队长的身价接近6800 万英镑m。

曼城前锋杰里米·多库（Jeremy Doku）在伊蒂哈德球场签署了一份新合同，将使他留在俱乐部直到2051,，并包含一年续约选项。这位比利时国脚表示：“这家俱乐部对我意义重大——我在球员和个人方面都得到了发展。我觉得在这里很安定，我知道因为这里工作人员的努力，我每天都在进步。”

巴西边锋萨维尼奥（Savinho）仍希望在9月1. 转会截止日期前确保转会至托特纳姆热刺。伊普斯维奇对签下曼城中后卫朱马·巴（Juma Bah）感兴趣。这名塞拉利昂国脚，20, 上赛季在尼斯租借。

这种投降的行为。如果切尔西将他卖给曼城，并且设法收回四年前为他支付的资金，那么在国王路上应该举行一场盛大的庆祝活动。

事实上，有早期迹象表明，在他们自己的新任主帅哈比·阿隆索（Xabi Alonso）领导下，切尔西正在追求一个更连贯的转会政策，并将使球队阵容达到更好的平衡。

如果费尔南德斯离开，这将是他们朝着正确方向迈出的又一步。而对于曼城来说，情况则恰恰相反。

马雷斯卡在尝试接替瓜迪奥拉方面已经承担了英格兰足球中最困难的工作。如果他签下费尔南德斯，这项工作将变得更加艰巨。

沙特盯上萨尔，三人接近热刺离队之门

■ 托特纳姆热刺中场帕佩·马塔尔·萨尔（Pape Matar Sarr）正成为沙特职业联赛阿尔阿希利（Al Ahli）的目标。这名23岁的球员将被允许离队，布伦特福德、阿斯顿维拉以及其他欧洲球队也对他感兴趣。尤文图斯重启了关于热刺门将的谈判

窗前观察 By SIMON JONES

古列尔莫·维卡里奥，而后卫克里斯蒂安·罗梅罗将于明天在马德里竞技进行体检。杰德·斯彭斯将加盟国际米兰。热刺仍在就曼彻斯特城边锋萨维尼奥和利物浦的科迪·加克波进行谈判。曼城的奥马尔·马尔穆什也在他们的名单上。

■ 利兹联即将达成一项价值 820 万英镑m 的交易，引进门兴格拉德巴赫中后卫尼科·埃尔韦迪。这位 29, 岁的瑞士国脚也可以出任右后卫。

■ 那不勒斯已与切尔西达成协议，以初步租借形式签下后卫本诺伊特·巴迪亚希尔，并附带约 2300 万英镑m 的买断选项。凯尔特人即将完成对切尔西边后卫兰登·埃梅纳洛的租借。

■ 曼彻斯特联边锋伊森·威廉姆斯以未公开的费用加盟彼得伯勒。

■ 诺丁汉森林正以自由身签下富勒姆门将史蒂文·本达。

■ 赫尔城已正式表达对埃弗顿中场蒂姆·伊罗格布纳姆的兴趣，开出的报价超过 £1500 万。

■ 利兹联前锋乔·盖哈特在 £450 万 的转会前已完成了赫尔城的体检。

■ 德比郡正从西布罗姆签下亚历克斯·莫沃特。

■ 巴西球队帕尔梅拉斯已从伯恩利签下法比奥·索。

■ 自由球员威尔弗里德·扎哈在寻找新俱乐部期间，正在前东家水晶宫进行训练。

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德雷珀：伤病摧毁了我的精神

网球：第 71 页

我需要更多球员

竞争对手挥金如土，卡里克向联队高层发出恳求

NATHAN SALT 发自都柏林

迈克尔·卡里克昨晚敦促他在曼彻斯特联的上司们引进更多球员，以帮助俱乐部在英超顶端展开竞争。

安德烈·桑托斯、尤里·蒂莱曼斯和卡尔·达里奥是今年夏天迄今为止抵达老特拉福德的仅有球员，总花费 £8500 万，而联队的竞争对手们则签下了如埃利奥特·安德森和摩根·罗杰斯等 1 亿英镑m-plus 球员。

联队在今年夏天的联赛支出排名不在前十之列——升级球队考文特里和伊普斯维奇的支出更多——卡里克坚持认为他需要更多援军才能在顶端发起挑战。

“不能是为了签而签，但当然我们想要进步，我们需要进步，”卡里克说。“现状就是如此，无论是财务问题还是其他什么。”

“目前，我们必须充分利用现有资源，但我们必须继续推进，在每一个界限内全力以赴，这样我们才能再次获胜。”

足球总监杰森·威尔考克斯随队前往爱尔兰参加训练营，他面临着在 9 月 1 日截止日期前引进一名左后卫和一名中场球员的压力。

“我们的信息非常明确，即我们需要继续推进，并且有些事情我们想要尝试去做，但同样需要确保选择正确，”卡里克补充道。

冷静的卡里克无法掩饰他的绝望：第 72 页

飘扬的旗帜：艾米·亨特在赢得 100 米冠军后，又摘得欧洲 200 米金牌 GETTY

阿森纳就签下球星奥斯梅恩进行洽谈

作者：SIMON JONES

阿森纳在与加拉塔萨雷就加布里埃尔·马蒂内利（Gabriel Martinelli）和伊森·恩瓦内里（Ethan Nwaneri）潜在转会进行洽谈期间，讨论了签下维克托·奥斯梅恩（Victor Osimhen）的可能性。

加拉塔萨雷对马蒂内利开出了 300 万英镑850 万 的口头报价，但这位 25 岁的巴西人不愿离开伦敦。与此同时，19, 岁的恩瓦内里正在评估他的选择；就目前而言，关于尼日利亚前锋奥斯梅恩的谈判尚未取得进展。马蒂内利在最近几周也受到了巴黎圣日耳曼的初步关注，但这家法国俱乐部现在将注意力转向了 21 岁的阿贾克斯球员米卡·戈茨（Mika Godts）。

英格兰 Under 21 国脚恩瓦内里对上赛季缺乏出场时间感到沮丧，但受到了 AC 米兰、富勒姆、RB 莱比锡和多特蒙德等球队的关注。

阿森纳还在与西汉姆联就以 300 万英镑m 出售边锋里斯·尼尔森（Reiss Nelson）进行洽谈，而那不勒斯则想要前锋加布里埃尔·热苏斯（Gabriel Jesus）。

汉堡队对法比奥·维埃拉（Fabio Vieira）感兴趣，而另一位中场球员马丁·祖比门迪（Martin Zubimendi）则在若泽·穆里尼奥执教的皇家马德里的关注名单上。

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独家促销

节省超过 50%^ 法式阳台房

欧洲

Duet

河 cruise • 观光游

包含用餐期间饮料、小费及 Wi-Fi

莱茵河与多瑙河：欧洲瑰宝

窗房起* £1,899 / 人

14 晚 / 2026年9月 - 12月

您的假期包含

在 Travelmarvel Vega 号上享受 14 晚全包河 cruise*

邮轮总监、娱乐与活动协调员以及当地导游的服务

包含的观光游：布达佩斯步行游、维也纳步行游、梅尔克修道院游、纽伦堡市区游、班贝格市区游、科隆的世界遗产奥古斯都堡、阿姆斯特丹水道玻璃顶船探索，以及在河船上享受巴伐利亚美食、音乐和民间舞蹈的节日之夜

提供其他可选行程

travelmarvel

假期代码：RVR7244

窗房* £1,899 / 人

船东套房* £4,399 / 人

法式阳台房* £2,699 / 人

*所示价格、船只和行程基于 2026年10月26日 出发。^所示价格包含基于两名乘客共用且直接通过 Imagine Cruising 预订的折扣和优惠。

独家促销

节省超过 52%**

享受全程包含的专业导游游览

船上包含用餐饮料、小费及 Wi-Fi

柬埔寨与越南之宝：沉浸式湄公河 cruise

豪华双床阳台套房起^^ £2,499 / 人

14 晚 / 2026年9月 - 2027年2月

您的假期包含

在 RV Lotus 号上享受七晚全包河 cruise

包含邮轮期间所有用餐饮料、小费及 Wi-Fi

暹粒、金边、湄公河三角洲、湄公河、柬埔寨村庄及胡志明市的陪同游览

在胡志明市 Le Méridien Saigon 五星级酒店入住两晚，含早餐

在暹粒 Shinta Mani Angkor 五星级酒店入住三晚，含早餐

travelmarvel

假期代码：ASA8599

豪华双床 阳台套房** £2,499 / 人

SADEC 双床 阳台套房** £3,199 / 人

**所示价格包含基于两名乘客共用豪华双床阳台套房且直接通过 Imagine Cruising 预订的折扣和优惠。^^所示价格和行程基于 2026年9月25日 出发。

IMAGINE CRUISING

致电我们： 01793 575 226 周一至周日：上午 9 点 - 晚上 8 点

访问我们的网站： imaginecruising.co.uk

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MailPuzzles（邮报谜题）

条款与条件，第 58 页

纵向

1 企业资金的流入和流出总量 (4,4) 2 _ Mann，出演电影《丛林乔治》以及这部名为 40, married to Judd Apatow (6) 3 有组织合唱团体中的成员 (10) 4 字母的垂直笔画 (4) 5 _ Minogue，歌手兼演员，在《家有我家》中饰演艾玛·杰克逊 (6) 6 像暴露身体大部分区域的服装 (8) 8 苏格兰的普雷斯特威克是一个国际____的所在地 (7) 9 David ，已故演员，在《Boon》中饰演哈里·克劳福德 (5) 13 墙上用于将设备连接到电源的地方 (5,5) 15 最初设计作为篮球女性替代方案的运动 (7) 16 用于发射炮弹的短管大炮 (8) 17 Lance ，出生于 1934 年的前西印度群岛旋转球投手 (5) 18 House ，《权力的游戏》中以嗨花园城堡为基地的统治家族 (6) 20 形容被抑制且未表达的情绪 (4-2) 22 Rhythm ，珍妮·杰克逊于 1989 年发行的歌曲 (6) 24 工具的切割边 (4)

周一公布答案

单词轮盘

你有十分钟时间利用轮盘中的字母寻找尽可能多的单词。每个单词必须使用中心字母和至少三个其他字母，且每个字母只能使用一次。不能使用复数、外来词或专有名词。允许以 's' 结尾的动词。今日九字母单词线索：一千个派对狂人在一个美国花园前，一个应该保持恭敬的地方。评分：8 个单词，平均；12, 良好；16, 非常好；18 个或更多，优秀。明日公布答案

扫描二维码立即注册，通过 Morning Mail 通讯订阅每日测试你的通用知识问答。

姓名游戏

网格中隐藏了一位歌手的名字。回答问题，然后重新排列与答案对应的字母以填入姓名。周一公布答案

方框 1：以下哪一张是 Melanie C（如图）迄今为止排名最高的专辑？

Reason (P)

Sweat (O)

Northern Star (W)

方框 2：单词 'yuppie' 来自一个缩写，意为年轻的城市____？政治家 (1)

无产者 (E)

专业人士 (R)

方框 3：已故的 Roy Hattersley 是以下哪个政党的国会议员？

保守党 (A)

工党 (Y)

自由民主党 (K)

方框 4：以下哪位作者写了 2002 年的小说《我不知道她是怎么做到的》？

Marian Keyes (I)

Jill Mansell (G)

Allison Pearson (L)

方框 5：在男子 FIFA 世界杯比赛中进球年龄最大的球员是谁？

喀麦隆的 Roger Mills (M)

巴西的 Pele (B)

葡萄牙的 Cristiano Ronaldo (C)

方框 6：Oudewater 是以下哪个欧洲国家的城市和市镇？

荷兰 (S)

奥地利 (E)

丹麦 (V)

方框 7：哪位女演员于 1945 年出生，原名 Ilyena Lydia Mironoff？

Susan Sarandon (A)

Meryl Streep (F)

Helen Mirren (L)

方框 8：已故女演员 Anne Schedeen 在哪部美国电视情景喜剧中饰演女家长 Kate Tanner？

Dinosaurs (J)

ALF (U)

Everybody Loves Raymond (D)

昨日答案：

LEO SAYER

(3L, 2A, 3E, 4S, 5G, 6Y, 7R, 8E)

图片：PA

铺轨

铺设轨道使火车能从 A 村旅行到 B 村。数字表示每行和每列中有多少段轨道。只有直线轨道和曲线轨道。轨道不能自我交叉。

周一公布答案

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MailPuzzles

蜂巢

所有答案按顺时针方向围绕其数字排列。线索 1 的答案从给定字母开始。

1. 允许
2. 撤回
3. 光线
4. 靠近
5. 磨损
6. 修改
7. 驱逐
8. 限制
9. 测试
10. 试点
11. 即
12. 屋顶工

答案：见拉页封底

KAKURO

请使用 1 到 9 的数字填充网格中的空白方格，且每行空白方格中不得重复出现任何数字。填充的数字之和必须等于每行顶部或起始处阴影框中的总数。阴影框下半部分的数字表示纵向总和；上半部分的数字表示横向总和。

周一公布答案

MASTERQUIZ

1. 在伊夫林·沃夫的小说《布莱德索普回头看》中，塞巴斯蒂安·弗莱特的泰迪熊叫什么名字？
2. 在 1964 年的喜剧电影《Carry On Cleo》中，谁饰演了克利奥帕特拉？

3. 吉他手罗伯特·弗里戈（Robert Frigo）是哪个前卫摇滚乐队中唯一一直留在队中的成员？

4. 何塞·安东尼奥·卡斯特（Jose Antonio Kast）在 3 月成为了哪个南美国家的总统？

5. 在矿井中，从地表延伸到矿层的水平轴被称为什么（四个字母的单词）？
6. 索赛群岛位于哪个大洋？

答案见封底页

MINDBENDER

1. 在一个户外音乐会场馆中，人数和椅子总计 134 个。如果场馆内总共有 490 条腿，那么有多少把椅子？
2. “袋子”（bag）、“花园”（garden）和“毛巾”（towel）之间有什么共同点？

3. 哪个婚礼术语可能意味着“无收据”（NO RECEIPT）？

4. 下面哪个是不合群的：Makemake, Hale-Bopp, Gonggong, Eris？

5. 重新排列字母组以组成三种音乐流派：ALL ASS CEH SPI DAN UAL EGR RIT BLU。

答案见封底页

KILLER

SUDOKU

填充网格中的方格，使每行、每列以及每个 3x3 方格都包含 1 到 9 的所有数字。由虚线连接的一组单元格之和必须等于左上角的数字。每组单元格内数字不得重复。

SOLUTION ON

MONDAY

需要提示？请致电 0901 293 6238 或发送短信 KILLER 至 65700，即可获得今日谜题的四个提示。通话和短信费用为 £1 加上您的标准网络资费。今日提示仅在今日 00.01 至 23.30 之间提供。

PITCHERWITS™

1a. 马，在训练中磨练，被挤在其中 (10)

8a. 掉落至权力之外的运输线 (7)

14a. 撕碎巴斯德的调制物 (5,2)

18a. 我保留 10, 以我古怪的方式，作为一种佛罗里达甜点 (3,4,3)

3d. 虚拟运动的个人驱动者？ (8)

5d. 那些依赖于严重凹陷的锅的人！ (10)

6d. 采取本（Ben）的计划，为食肉动物的餐盘准备的一份 (1-4,5)

9d. 钉子被擦干净，远离气管 (8)

在 Pitcherwits 中挑战你的智慧——这是一个令人兴奋的谜题，部分答案在图片中！视觉线索的答案填入网格中的阴影区域。

周一公布答案

DOWN

2 那个男人的史前碎片 (3) 3 图片线索 4 喷气发动机的狮子语言？ (4) 5 图片线索 6 图片线索 9 图片线索

10 Not able, above all, to be egg-shaped (4) 12 友好的岩石碎片？ (4) 15 杆末端的舞蹈？ (4) 17 这个度假胜地里有动能！ (3)

ACROSS

1 图片线索 7 低音歌手，带着老板兜风 (5) 8 图片线索 11 极小量，每两年在云中出现一次 (5) 13 在河口非法交易 (5)

昨日答案 — 横向：1 Blasting off. 5 Wader. 7 Lithe. 9 Flounce. 11 Day. 12 Bit. 13 Intense. 16 Organ. 17 Limit. 18 Go cap in hand. 纵向：1 Bowled along. 2 Torso. 3 Nolan. 4 Field-tested. 6 Defying. 8 Tie beam. 10 Use. 14 Ton-up. 15 Nylon.

MAILWORD

桥牌大师课 / 隐喻填字游戏

北家 ▲ 10 9 5 3 ▼ 9 ▼ 无 ▲ KQ J 9 8 7 5 3 西家 ▲ K ▼ A K Q J 7 3 ▲ A 6 5 2 ▲ 10 4

南家 ▲ 8 7 2 ▼ 10 8 6 ▲ K Q J 10 9 8 ▲ 6

你在西家位置，在北家加倍 4♣ 后，你正在打 6♥。你领出 4K 并赢下该手牌，随后你用了三轮抽掉将牌。由于你持有一张，再出两轮将牌后，南家弃掉了 4♣，而只弃掉了梅花。你出 4A 并发现没有梅花。

你现在知道在守黑桃，且其初始牌型必定是 4-5-6-8。出掉你最后一张将牌，此时你手中还剩五张牌，留意你左手边的弃牌。

如果为了保留四张黑桃而再次弃掉一张梅花，你可以出 4K，然后打出你的梅花，让只剩下黑桃。如果弃掉一张黑桃，你可以通过 4K 抢回出牌权以收割该花色。

HEATHER DHONDY

为了获得获胜机会，请解开填字游戏，揭晓阴影方格中纵向排列的单词。 如何参与：请致电 0901 293 6233 留下今天的答案和您的详细信息，或发送短信至 1X3X 65700，内容包含单词 CRYPTIC、您的答案和姓名。短信 / 技能费用为 (1) 加上标准网络资费。或者通过邮寄方式，将完成的填字游戏寄至 Daily Mail Prize Crossword 17.944, PO Box 28, Coldwater, Essex CD2 8LF。请附上您的姓名和地址。每周将从周一 00.31 至周五 23.59 收到所有正确每日参赛作品中抽取一名获胜者。邮寄参赛作品必须在次日之前盖戳才有效。电话和短信必须在 23.59 前收到；答案在 00.01 变更。仅限 18 岁及以上英国居民，不包括北爱尔兰。详见条款与条件。

横向

1 冬季（Winter）立即（right away）转向一点，以获取关于某人历史的事实 (7) 5 孤立的工人团体被假期扣留 (3,3) 9 坐在 Dicky 附近哭泣 (2,5) 10 私下的苦涩谈话 (7) 11 淡水鱼确实定期出现 (3) 12 青少年的产品好奇地没有任何覆盖 (11) 13 诗歌中听到的高亢轻柔声音 (5) 14 曾经被替换的椅子，是冬季探险者的设备？ (3,6) 16 一个法国丈夫在完整的 PE 之前，遗憾地代表了一种不乐于助人的类型？ (9) 17 在轮班中安排商品，也许 (5) 19 注意到繁茂的植物变得醉醺醺，不再具有现实感？ (2,3,6) 22 响亮实习生之中的噪音 (3) 23 搬迁后，一个凯尔特人是灵活的 (7) 24 在高点首先发表演讲？ (7) 26 在美国南部城市看到的极瘦家庭 (8) 27 举止得体的女士伴侣被给予凝冻食物 (7)

纵向

1 我怀疑这根酒吧缺乏对我们文化的描述 (7) 2 正确地追求事物，像一个遵守规则的运动员？ (2,3,5,5) 3 蓄热炉再次不再流行 (3) 4 一个即将到来的寓言讲述者模型 (5) 5 绳索 Carol 纠缠在一起，具有一个物理元素 (9) 6 一些没有什么特别的颜色阴影 (5) 7 我们在匈牙利周围自由交付的领先车型 (5-5,5) 8 评级较低的商品销售者靠近另一个 (6) 12 美国男性本质上持有的标准制服 (5) 14 没有折中方案，俱乐部在网络上处于极高活动水平？ (2,4,3) 15 男子拒绝显示肿胀 (5) 16 在空荡的堤岸上聚集军事小队 (6) 18 被蜿蜒小巷包围的非洲国家 (7) 20 据报道在伯克郡学校用餐 (5) 21 玛格丽特给出的邮政费率脱离 (5) 25 在意大利夜总会发现的女人 (3)

需要提示？发送 TIP 至 65700 即可收到今天填字游戏的四个答案，或致电 0901 293 6236。短信和电话费用为 (1) 加上标准网络资费。今天的提示仅在今天 00.01 至 23.30 之间提供。

30秒挑战

从左侧给出的数字开始，并按照向右移动时的指令进行操作。在30秒内，初学者必须完成自己的挑战；中级玩家必须完成自己的挑战以及初学者的挑战；高级玩家必须完成自己的挑战以及中级玩家的挑战。

答案见下方

你的答案

初学者 / 85 / +6 / ÷7 / ×6 / +18 / ÷12 / ×40 / 1 / 2 OF IT / +2 / ÷9

中级 / 54 / -9 / 11 / 16 OF IT / ×12 / 5 / 99 OF IT / TIMES ITSELF / 4 / 5 OF IT / 25% OF IT / -2 / 5 / 6 OF IT 高级 / 1000 / 7 / 40 OF IT / 200% OF IT / -14 / 5 / 14 OF IT / LESS 30% / 225% OF IT / 66 2 / 3% OF IT / +17 / 3 / 11 OF IT

| KENKEN | | | | | | |

2 / 4 / 5 / 3 / 6 / 1 3 / 1 / 3 / 4 / 3 / 6 3 / 2 / 4 / 6 / 1 / 5 4 / 6 / 3 / 1 / 3 1 / 3 / 6 / 5 / 2 / 1 6 / 5 / 1 / 2 / 4 / 3

| KELLER SUDOKU | | | | | | | 8 / 3 / 5 / 4 / 9 / 1 / 6 2 7 9 / 2 / 4 / 7 / 5 / 8 / 1 3 9 9 / 1 / 7 / 5 / 8 / 2 / 8 5 4 7 / 4 / 1 / 9 / 2 / 3 / 5 6 6 2 / 9 / 6 / 5 / 6 / 4 / 7 1 3 5 / 8 / 3 / 1 / 7 / 8 / 9 4 2 3 / 8 / 2 / 1 / 5 / 4 7 9 4 / 5 / 9 / 6 / 3 / 7 / 2 9 1 1 / 7 / 2 / 8 / 4 / 8 / 3 6 5

RICHARDSON. DOWN: 1 The coast is clear. 2 Emperor. 3 Agincourt. 4 Epsom. 5 Acrid. 6 Grassed. 7 Non-intervention. 9 Coterie. 10 Diverse. 14 Bandster. 16 Imperil. 18 Maenads. 20 Vouch. 21 Enoch.

| SUDOKU X | | | | | | | 1 / 6 / 3 / 2 / 4 / 5 8 / 4 / 2 / 3 / 6 / 1 6 / 3 / 5 / 1 / 2 / 4 2 / 1 / 4 / 6 / 5 / 3 4 / 2 / 1 / 5 / 3 / 6 3 / 5 / 6 / 4 / 1 / 2

| GOGEN | | | | | | | 5 / 7 / 1 / 0 7 / 9 / 6 / 7 / 1 8 / 2 / 6 / 1 9 / 6 / 1 10 / 2 / 6 / 1 11 / 6 / 1 12 / 6 / 1 13 / 6 / 1 14 / 6 / 1 15 / 6 / 1 16 / 6 / 1 17 / 6 / 1

| MALWORD | | | | | | | 1 / 6 / 3 / 2 / 4 / 5 8 / 4 / 2 / 3 / 6 / 1 6 / 3 / 5 / 1 / 2 / 4 2 / 1 / 4 / 6 / 5 / 3 4 / 2 / 1 / 5 / 3 / 6 3 / 5 / 6 / 4 / 1 / 2

隐喻填字游戏 No. 17,941 ACROSS: 6 in a tight corner. 9 Shrike. 10 Ayia Napa, 11 Budgeted, 13 Orates. 15 Advise. 17 Cycles, 19 Quinoa. 20 Hardwood. 22 Smash hit. 24 Gnany. 26 Prison officers. DOWN: 1 Without a murmur. 2 Raki. 3 Divert. 4 Acrimony. 5 Bran. 7 Hoards. 8 Expressionless. 12 Gavin. 14 Aglow. 16 Scathing. 18 What-if. 21 Regain. 23 So-so. 25 Awed.

MAILWORD ACROSS: 1 Slip. 5 Clef. 9 Scene. 10 Like. 11 Horace. 12 Used. 13 Awe. 14 Llamas. 15 New. 17 Isis. 18 Arson. 20 Icyra. 24 Beam. 26 Ron. 27 Need-be. 29 Ego. 30 Lady. 31 Unseen. 33 Aide. 34 Stops. 35 Glad. 36 Espy. DOWN: 1 Screws. 2 Lea. 3 Inclined. 4 Peels. 5 Chumy. 6 Lisa. 7 Ekes. 8 Fed. 9 Sower. 11 Ha-ha. 15 Ailments. 19 Obeyed. 21 Creepy. 22 Rages. 23 Arson. 25 Abuse. 27 Nail. 28 Edda. 30 Lag. 32 Sop.

世界上最小、最难的填字游戏 — ACROSS: 1 Icky. 5 Aye. 6 Fun. 7 Flew. DOWN: 2 Cast. 3 Kyrie. 4 Hi. 6 Pt.

今日谜题答案

快速问答：1 Memphis. 2 hambard Kingdom Brunel. 3 Taylor Swift. 4 Africa. 5 Abbey Road. 脑筋急转弯：1 1 / 2 chairs. 2 They may all follow too. 3 Reception. 4 Haki-Bopp, a comet; the others are dwarf planets. 5 Bluegrass, dancehall, spiritual. 大师问答：1 Aloysius. 2 Amanda Barrie. 3 King Crimson. 4 Chile. 5 Adif. 6 Pacific. 蜂巢谜题：1 Permit. 2 Revoke. 3 Kindle. 4 Heared. 5 Eros. 6 Edited. 7 Eiled. 8 Units. 9 Trial. 10 Airman. 11 Namely. 12 Tiers.

KUROSU O X O O X X X O O O X O X O X O O X O X O X O O O O X X O X O O O X 30秒挑战：初学者：16。中级：65。高级：39。

邮报旅行 (Mail Travel)

您熟悉且信赖的品牌

今日特惠

克拉科夫之魂

5 天起价 £600**

包含项目：

• 2026年9月至2028年3月期间选定的出发日期
• 往返机票、大巴旅行及接送服务
• 四晚含早餐住宿
• 克拉科夫之旅，包括瓦维尔城堡、马里亚茨基教堂和主广场 (Rynek Glowny)
• 参观奥斯威辛
• 由旅行经理陪同

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Daily

Mail

FRIDAY, AUGUST 14, 2026

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The nightmare of living with a SEXSOMNIAC

Secrets & Lives STARTS PAGE 31

INFERNO

On hottest day of year, rampant wildfires engulf streets of family homes

Devastation: Fires destroy houses in Stourbridge in the West Midlands yesterday after a blaze at a golf course spread to residential properties

WILDFIRES caused apocalyptic scenes last night as they engulfed homes on the hottest day of the year.

Temperatures soared to a blistering 38.1C as firefighters battled

By Inderdeep Bains and Sam Greenhill

several infernos across the country. Residents were forced to flee – with some told to dampen the outside of their properties first –

as blazes ravaging swathes of grassland spread to homes.

A train derailment in Sussex that left two people seriously injured may also have been a result of the scorching summer.

A major incident was declared as six houses were destroyed by a rapidly

spreading wildfire in Stourbridge – one of several blazes that left West Midlands Fire Service facing 'extreme levels of demand'.

Witnesses described how the flames 'jumped from house to house' while

Turn to Page 4

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Page 2

Daily Mail, Friday, August 14, 2026

Summary: Cloudy, mild

UK TODAY: The day starts mild with mostly cloudy skies. Temperatures rise to warm by afternoon, remaining cloudy. Winds strengthen slightly from the west. Max 32c.

Today's weather

	9am	12noon	3pm	6pm	9pm
London	9 24c	30c	32c	32c	28c
Plymouth	2c	24c	25c	24c	21c
Cardiff	2c	23c	24c	22c	21c
B'ham	2c	26c	29c	27c	21c
M'chester	2c	24c	25c	23c	20c
Newcastle	2c	25c	26c	23c	20c
Glasgow	18c	19c	19c	18c	16c
Aberdeen	19c	19c	20c	18c	17c
Belfast	16c	18c	19c	18c	16c

5 day forecast

	Sat	Sun	Mon	Tue	Wed
London	27c	26c	25c	27c	25c
Plymouth	26c	24c	24c	24c	23c
Cardiff	26c	24c	24c	24c	23c
B'ham	24c	22c	23c	24c	22c
M'chester	2c	20c	2c	20c	20c
Newcastle	2c	19c	19c	20c	20c
Glasgow	18c	17c	18c	18c	17c
Aberdeen	19c	17c	16c	18c	18c
Belfast	18c	18c	19c	19c	18c

Europe forecast

	week	1	premence	2	Geovos	date	1st	premence	2	1st
Amsterdam	Sun	33	10	mon	28	14	10	mon	33	10
Bremen	Sun	36	10	mon	30	14	10	mon	33	10
Frankfurt	Sun	36	10	mon	30	14	10	mon	33	10

Around the world yesterday

	weather	1	weather	2	weather	1	weather	2	weather
Algiers	Suvy	33	9	Florence	Suvy	30	8	New Delhi	Suvy
Amsterdam	Suvy	33	9	Geneva	Suvy	32	8	New York	Suvy
Althens	Suvy	33	9	Barbados	Fair	30	7	New York	Suvy
Auckland	Driven	31	9	Germany	Suvy	30	7	Oak	Fair
Bahrain	Suvy	30	9	Indiana	Fair	30	6	Palau	Suvy
Barcelona	Suvy	33	9	Hongkong	Fair	32	6	Paris	Suvy
Basra	Suvy	30	9	Indonesia	Suvy	30	5	Paris	Suvy
Beijing	Suvy	30	9	Kosho	Suvy	30	4	Prague	Suvy
Beirut	Suvy	30	9	Jersey	Suvy	29	3	Blond	Suvy
Belfast	Thur	24	9	Larnaca	Suvy	34	3	Big	Fair
Belgrade	Suvy	29	9	La Palma	Fair	27	3	Rome	Suvy
Berlin	Suvy	29	9	Lisbon	Suvy	30	3	Singapore	Fair
Biarritz	Fair	27	9	London	Suvy	30	3	Stockholm	Fair
Brisbane	Suvy	32	9	Los Angeles	Cloudy	24	3	Strasbourg	Suvy
Brussels	Suvy	31	9	London	Suvy	40	3	Sydney	Suvy
Budapest	Fair	23	7	Madrid	Suvy	35	3	Tangier	Suvy
Budapest	Suvy	20	7	Melbourne	Suvy	32	3	Tel Aviv	Suvy
Calvi	Suvy	34	9	Malta	Suvy	33	3	Seaside	Suvy
Cape Town	Suvy	28	7	Melbourne	Driven	14	3	Tokyo	Thur
Casablanca	Suvy	29	9	Monaco City	Suvy	32	3	Toronto	Cloudy
Copenhagen	Fair	19	9	Miami	Fair	34	3	Paris	Suvy
Corfu	Suvy	37	9	Milan	Suvy	33	3	Vancouver	Suvy
Dubai	Suvy	45	9	Montreal	Cloudy	29	3	Venice	Suvy
Dublin	Cloudy	24	9	Moscow	Driven	14	3	Vienna	Suvy
Dubrovnik	Suvy	33	9	Montreal	Thur	27	3	Warsaw	Cloudy
Faro	Suvy	27	9	Nairobi	Suvy	23	3	Wellington	Faro

Moon and Sun 6020th Ave. 13.5pm, scto: 8.50pm Sun from London, 5.45pm, scto: 6.25pm Manchester mkts: 5.45pm, scto: 8.30pm HIGH TIME London Bridge: 4.30pm Liverpool 1.10pm Extremes (24 hrs to 9pm Wed) Warmest: Rose-Ste-Wys, 9kt. Coldest: South Newington, 8ct. Wattest: 12.5pm, scto: 8.50pm 4.00pm, scto: 12.5pm

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Nigel's in the pink on polling day in Clacton

A DAPPER Nigel Farage cast his vote in the Clacton by-election yesterday as he sought to ward off the challenge of joke candidate Count Binface.

Dressed in a white jacket and pink trousers, the Reform UK leader headed to a polling station in the Essex seaside constituency in his bid to be re-elected to the seat he won at the 2024 general election.

Mr Farage posted 'Three guesses who I voted for' on social media shortly after filling in his ballot paper. The 62-year-old quit as the MP for Clacton last month to

By Greg Heffer

trigger the by-election in protest at scrutiny over his donations from wealthy backers.

Mr Farage declared he was forcing a 'people versus the Establishment' contest, but the other main political parties boycotted the poll.

It has left Count Binface, a perennial comedy candidate at Westminster contests, as the Reform leader's most notable rival. He and Mr Farage are among a record 34 candidates, and the by-election is estimated to have cost taxpayers £250,000.

Putting the bin out? Nigel Mr Farage yesterday

Are Tories having a Kemi-naissance? Soaring numbers see her as a potential PM

By Greg Heffer Political Correspondent

KEMI Badenoch's growing popularity is fuelling talk of a 'Kemi-naissance' for the Conservatives, according to a top pollster.

A YouGov survey shows more voters now believe Mrs Badenoch is performing well as Tory leader and looks like a prime minister-in-waiting.

A bold pledge to abolish stamp duty on primary residences was followed by an improvement at Prime Minister's Questions as she held failing for Keir Starmer to account. As he floundered, Mrs Badenoch was seen as showing strong leadership, keeping up the pressure on issues such as the Peter Mandelson scandal.

Now nearly two-fifths (38 per cent) of the public think she is doing a good job as Leader of the Opposition, which is up 23 percentage points from last October.

And more than a quarter (27 per cent) believe she could be the next premier - which has tripled from the 8 per cent who felt so at the time of the 2025 Tory conference.

More than a third (35 per cent) of voters have a favourable opinion of Mrs Badenoch, up 14 percentage points from ten months ago.

Presenting its findings, YouGov said: 'In recent months there have been suggestions the Conservative Party's nadir is coming to

Cooper's attack on Keir

YVETTE Cooper has attacked Keir Starmer's premiership, admitting Labour 'hasn't done government very well' in the past two years.

The Health Secretary despaired at the previous prime minister's time in charge as she gave a damning assessment of her party's performance since its general election

landslide in 2024. Former home secretary and foreign secretary Ms Cooper was last month moved to the Department of Health by Andy Burnham.

Ms Cooper said Sir Keir's 'missions' for government 'kind of disappeared'. She also moaned about the former PM wanting ministers to 'bring me solutions, not problems'.

an end, supposedly thanks to the public being excited by Kemi Badenoch's performances in the Commons. Some have even termed it a 'Kemi-naissance'.

'Undoubtedly, opinion towards Kemi Badenoch has grown more positive since last autumn, with this evident across all of our key trackers. After a stagnant first year in post, belief that Badenoch has been doing well as Conservative leader and that she looks like a

prime minister-in-waiting both increased significantly between October and December last year, and have trended further upwards since April.

But there are signs that the Conservatives continue to face trust issues with voters, as only 25 per cent of the public consider Mrs Badenoch to be 'trustworthy' - up just seven points since last October - while 37 per cent think she's 'untrustworthy'.

The YouGov report added that the 'Kemi bonus', whereby she is seen more positively than the party, is 'not symmetrical, with it being particularly prevalent among Reform UK voters'.

Some 24 per cent of those who backed the Liberal Democrats in 2024 now have a positive opinion of the Tory leader (up 13 points), while she has also enjoyed a nine-point increase in favourability among Labour voters (to 17 per cent) and seven-point rise among Green voters (to 13 per cent).

Migrant plan fury PAGES 12-13

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Page 3

Nicole: Why I put my career on hold when I married Tom Cruise

Ex-husband: With Tom Cruise

By Alex Doyle

Senior Showbusiness Reporter

IT'S widely recognised that the best marriages require at least some degree of sacrifice.

And in Nicole Kidman's case when she wed Tom Cruise, it was her acting career that took the hit.

The Oscar-winning actress said: 'Suddenly I was 22, 23 years old and I had this huge movie star husband. But it just seemed completely natural. We just fell madly in love and it was that simple. I remember people saying to me, "OK, well this is really going to affect your career". [I was] like, "I don't care. I'm in love. I want to be married".'

The Australian actress, 59, who married Cruise on Christmas Eve in 1990, made the comments to British Vogue, posing for a photoshoot in a £3,550 Dolce and Gabbana silk satin shirt dress.

Reflecting on the beginning of her relationship with the Top Gun actor, now 64, she said that when fans started referring to her as 'Cruise's wife', her friends said 'we told you so'.

'[I was] like, so what? I wasn't meant to marry the man I love? Of course I'll throw my career away, I don't care,' she said.

The couple, who adopted daughter Isabella in 1992 and son Connor in 1995, divorced in 2001. Four years later she met musician Keith Urban.

They wed in 2006 and have two teenage daughters but divorced in January this year. Speaking about their separation, she likened the feeling to that of 'free-falling' and 'jumping off'.

Acting great Prunella leaves £3.1million

PRUNELLA Scales, who found fame as Basil Fawlty's combative wife Sybil in Fawlty Towers, left more than £3.1million in her will, it emerged yesterday.

Ms Scales, who had vascular dementia, died at 93 last October at her home near Wandsworth Common in south-west London. Probate records have now revealed that she left the bulk of her estate in trust for her family.

The actress, who was appointed a CBE in 1992 for services to the theatre, was married to fellow actor Timothy West for 61 years until he died in November 2024.

Sharp-tongued, long-suffering Sybil became one of TV's great comedy characters, shouting 'Basil' at her hapless screen

By Andrew Young

husband, played by John Cleese in 12 episodes of Fawlty Towers, which was originally screened between 1975 and 1979.

But she was also a respected stage actress, and was associated with heavyweight television roles such as her 1991 performance as Queen Elizabeth II in Alan Bennett's A Question Of Attribution about Soviet spy Sir Anthony Blunt.

She played the role at the National Theatre in 1981 and later in a BBC TV adaptation in 1991 which won a Bafta award.

Ms Scales gained a new TV audience with her husband in their show Great Canal Journeys, which ran from 2014 to

2019 on Channel 4. But she was forced to quit when her dementia took hold.

After her death, her family revealed that she had been watching Fawlty Towers the day before she died.

Her grant of probate reveals that she left assets worth £3,376,585, reduced to a net estate of £3,166,554 after liabilities. She left thousands of pounds to various arts, gardening and environmental charities.

There were also legacies of £2,000 each to two god-daughters. The remainder of her estate was in trust, with shares of 40 per cent each going to her sons Sam, an actor, and Joseph. The remaining 20 per cent was left to her step-daughter Juliet, from West's previous marriage.

Wed for 61 years: Ms Scales and West

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Page 4

TINDERBOX BRITAIN

Ash has been raining down

Out of control: Smoke billows as wildfires spread to residential streets in Stourbridge in the West Midlands yesterday

Continued from Page One

residents grabbed what they could and fled. A child and three firefighters were taken to hospital.

Drone footage from the smoke-filled skies over the leafy market town showed the blaze threatening to engulf even more properties on the edge of a badly scorched field.

'Ash has been raining down on the roads for quite a few hours,' one Stourbridge resident told Sky News, describing the smoke as 'very, very strong'.

Simon Tuhill, chief fire officer at West Midlands Fire Service, said his team had dealt with 'thousands' of 999 calls.

Local councillor Andrew Tromans said: 'The apocalyptic scenes in Norton and across Stourbridge are sadly just a taste

'Flames engulfed the fire truck'

of what is to come if we don't act.'

Around 100 firefighters were tackling the inferno which broke out near Stourbridge golf course at noon, obliterating 40 acres of land. Golfers are said to have fled in their carts.

One witness said he saw the fire spread rapidly, consuming hedges, power lines and even a fire engine. 'When the fire brigade finally came, the whole lot was just engulfed in flames, including the fire truck,' Michael Morgan said. 'The flames just came straight through the bushes and covered the fire truck in flames. It just engulfed it.'

Resident Chris Dunnington said black smoke swept over homes from nearby fields.

'Then we saw the fire coming on to the driveways and fences of the first house,' he added.

'The wind picked up so strong so it was just fuelling the flames. It was just the perfect disaster.'

Jane Baxter, who was among those evacuated, said: 'We could see the flames above the rooftops of the houses - that was how high the flames were'. When a fire truck

Nightmare: Homes in the market town go up in flames as strong winds spread the fires

ran out of water, residents tried to beat back flames in nearby woodland themselves. At the same time, less than 30 miles away, another major incident was declared due to a large fire ripping through Salford Priors in Stratford-upon-Avon.

Warwickshire Fire and Rescue Service said: 'There is a large emergency presence in the area and we continue to advise residents nearby to close all doors and windows.' The service reported 'several field fires around Bidford-on-Avon and Salford Priors'.

'We have individuals who are

being treated for smoke inhalation. Efforts are being focused on preventing risk to life,' it said. Farmers were supporting the fire service by bringing bowsers filled with water to the scene.

Elsewhere in the region, homes in Castle Vale, Birmingham, were badly damaged by a fire, with one woman reported to have suffered serious injuries.

Images from the scene show two bungalows completely gutted by fire. Part of the roof of one of the homes appeared to have caved in. The M6 northbound near Bir-

mingham was temporarily shut between Junctions 5 and 6 due to thick smoke billowing across the carriageway. There were also fires in Sandyford, Stoke-on-Trent, where a small number of homes have been evacuated, according to Staffordshire Fire & Rescue Service, and reports came in last night of houses on fire in Maypole, south Birmingham.

Several fires were also reported in Worcestershire including in Pershore where half a dozen homes were thought to have been affected. One witness said the blaze spread through as many as six homes like a 'domino effect'.

'I saw a lot of smoke and before the fire service arrived there was a fire in what looked like somebody's back garden,' James Lees

said. 'All of a sudden a big puff of smoke came from a house, probably about four doors down from where it originally began. 'It was big black, billowing smoke and then it has kind of just

LITTLEJOHN

SEE PAGE 17

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Page 5

on us from the sky for hours

spread across the houses like a domino effect. Now there's probably about five or six houses that are just covered in smoke – you can see flames at the front and out at the back." Hereford &

Worcester Fire and Rescue Service said 200 properties had been left without power and one person had suffered smoke inhalation. A spokesman added: 'A number of homes have been damaged and

30 properties in the area have been evacuated.' Another major incident was declared in Norfolk after the county was hit by a series of infernos. Crews from Norfolk Fire and

Rescue Service attended 16 emergencies yesterday afternoon, including a fire at Mousehold Heath which saw local roads closed for some time. It came after five homes were

Horror: Stourbridge homes are destroyed after a huge grass fire, left, spread

destroyed in Caerphilly, South Wales, on Wednesday when a fire on a field spread. A woman has been arrested on suspicion of arson.

The blazes erupted as a fifth heatwave gripped the country, with the UK experiencing its hottest day of the year so far and the fifth hottest day on record.

The mercury peaked at 38.1C (100.5F) at Kew Gardens in west London, provisionally surpassing the 38C recorded in Lingwood, Norfolk, on June 26.

A rare amber extreme heat warning issued by the Met Office was in place until last night covering the Midlands and south-east of England.

It comes after the Fire Brigade Union this week warned the UK faces a shortage of firefighters to combat wildfires.

Union leader Steve Wright said 5,000 more firefighters were needed to prevent lives from being put at risk.

The UK has already seen more than 1,000 wildfires this year, making it the worst year on record.

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Page 6

TINDERBOX BRITAIN

By Lettice Bromovsky

A TRAIN carrying 150 passengers derailed in extreme heat yesterday, leaving two people seriously injured.

Terrified passengers were left clinging on to upturned seats and handrails as three carriages came off the tracks at around 3.54pm in East Sussex.

Witnesses said the carriages appeared to jump in the air before tipping on to the embankment and sliding some distance before coming to a halt.

Dramatic images in the aftermath of the incident – which left a further nine people with less serious injuries – showed a long section of track had buckled.

Passengers stood on top of the wreckage as they scrambled out of carriages which had upturned close to Lewes railway station.

Some could be seen on stretchers being taken to hospital. Many of those who did not require hospital treatment were taken to a local community centre to be triaged.

The cause of the derailment of the 2.24 Southern service from London Victoria to Eastbourne has not yet been confirmed, although it happened as Britain swelters through its hottest day of the year, with temperatures above 35C in parts of Sussex.

Early speculation has focused on the possibility that the steel tracks expanded in the heat and started to warp, but investigators have yet to establish what caused the train to leave the rails.

Christian Wolmar, a transport expert, told the Daily Mail: 'Well, there are two possible reasons this has happened. Obviously, the train track might have buckled before the train arrived.'

'But because the first carriages didn't derail, it might be that the dryness from the heat has led to the embankment collapsing,

'Everything went topsy turvy'

and then the train made the rails buckle rather than the other way round.

'I noticed yesterday when I was out on the heath for the eclipse – there's just great big fissures in Hampstead Heath, big openings like an earthquake, and that must be happening in many places.'

'So it could be that there's something like that that caused the embankment to partially collapse, and then the rails buckled under the weight of the train because the rails were unsupported.'

'Which could be the more likely explanation given that the first four carriages didn't go down.'

Norman Baker, who is a former Lewes MP and an ex-transport minister, also suggested the derailment may have been caused by a section of the track buckling in the heat.

He told Times Radio: 'They'll want to make sure that the railways are completely safe before any trains are allowed back on them and if it has been the case – that the rails have buckled – that will take considerably longer to repair.'

One passenger described the terrifying moment she was suddenly thrown from her seat after hearing a 'loud bang'.

Yana Ludwig, 56, from Washington State in the US, said: 'It was completely terrifying. I was coming back from London and Lewes is my stop.'

'There was a banging noise and everything went topsy turvy. There was lots of shaking, – it felt like a really long time, but it was probably only about ten seconds.'

'I landed on top of somebody. I'm just glad nobody was killed. It felt like it was maybe 20 minutes before the emergency services started showing up.'

'It could've been faster – time is kind of warped.'

Rob Bradley was travelling from London to Eastbourne with his six-year-old daughter Mabel when the crash happened, and said they were in the fourth carriage while the fifth overturned.

He said his daughter had been dancing between the fourth and fifth carriages just 30 seconds before the derailment. 'As she sat

Carriage: The back three carriages on the embankment near Lewes, next to the buckled tracks, circled and inset

Was the terrifying Sussex train crash caused by heatwave?

Chaos: A passenger perches on a seat in a carriage on its side, while others stand on the train by the warped line, circled

down, we felt the train speeding up and started to rock,' Mr Bradley said. 'Then our carriage jumped vertically upwards and we could tell it was a derailment.'

'The emergency brakes went on the train and everything got thrown forward. The train skidded for quite a while before it stopped.'

'We turned around and we saw the whole back of the train was open and smoke and dust were

pouring into the carriage and we saw the fifth carriage had gone on its side.'

Another passenger, father-of-two Liton Miah from Eastbourne, said he had been travelling with his wife and daughters to visit relatives in London when the train overturned.

Mr Miah suffered heavy bruising to his side and said he had noticed a warning about a problem with

the track before the crash. 'I saw on the big board there was a problem with the track. I don't know why they didn't take any precautions. I saved my family and tried to help another couple.'

'The guy was bleeding heavily and there was not much I could do to help him.'

Transport Secretary Heidi Alexander said she was 'deeply concerned of reports of a derail-

ment involving a Southern train in Lewes, Sussex'. She added: 'Grateful to emergency services who are on the scene supporting those impacted.'

'We are working quickly with the rail industry and local partners to assist passengers.'

The Rail Accident Investigation Branch is deploying experts to establish how the Southern service came off the tracks.

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Page 7

Water bills set to surge... despite the hosepipe ban

By Sam Merriman Political Correspondent

MILLIONS of people have been told their water bills will be hiked – in the midst of mass hosepipe bans and with three quarters of the country in drought.

Andy Burnham's vow to bring down the cost of living was in tatters yesterday after the water regulator announced bills will rise again for more than 30million people.

Ofwat was branded 'toothless' after it granted five water suppliers permission to raise bills above previously agreed levels – despite them losing billions of litres to leaks.

The Prime Minister said he was 'angry' at water companies using customers 'as a blank cheque' but has been challenged over what he is going to do about it.

Scandal-hit Thames Water was granted permission to hike bills again between 2027 and 2030, along with Southern Water, South East Water, Severn Trent and Wessex Water. Three have imposed hosepipe bans on more than

20million people this summer. Ofwat said it had given suppliers the provisional go-ahead for the unexpected hike in bills to fund £3.4billion-worth of new projects, including infrastructure for housing and data centres.

But the water regulator has already allowed suppliers to hike bills by 36 per cent between 2025 and 2030, with eye-watering increases last year and another 5.4 per cent on average bills from April.

The climb will spark further anger at a time when the water industry is under fire for pouring sewage into Britain's rivers, lakes and seas and losing billions of litres of water through faulty pipes.

The leaks and sewage flows have been blamed on a sustained under-investment in water infrastructure – while industry fat cats have handed themselves millions in bonuses and dividends.

Tory environment spokesman Victoria Atkins last night called on the Prime Minister to set out a 'credible, costed plan' for Britain's water industry rather than simply offering 'more sympathy'.

And warning any move from Mr Burnham to nationalise the sector would see bills rise further, she added: 'Labour should set out its plans clearly so bill payers know what they are being asked to pay for and what to expect in return.' Mr Burnham – who has vowed to

AS Britain baked during the fifth hottest day on record, there was really only one place to be – the beach.

With parasols providing much-needed shade, holidaymakers made the most of the sea's cooling breezes at Bournemouth to escape the heat.

The Met Office said a provisional temperature of 38.1C (100.6F) was recorded in Kew Gardens in south-west London, while Charlwood in Surrey and Pershore in Worcestershire hit 37.8C (100F).

Yesterday was also the ninth day of the year when temperatures hit at least 35C (95F), the fourth day for 36C (96.8F), and the third for 37C (98.6F) – all three being new records. Before this year, the UK had recorded 37C or higher on just

By Mark Duell

six days. On the hottest day of the year so far, a rare warning for 'extreme heat' ran for 15 hours from 9am to midnight, covering a swathe of England.

All of England is separately under a UK Health Security Agency amber alert until 9pm tonight, with warnings of a 'rise in deaths'.

Bus drivers plan to strike today over having to work in soaring temperatures. More than 1,500 working at eight Arriva North London garages will take industrial action today and tomorrow as well as other days this month and in September and October. The Unite union said the vehicles were too hot to

work or travel in. Chiltern Railways and East Midlands Railway told passengers to 'only travel if essential' yesterday.

Reduced services were also operated by c2c, CrossCountry, Great Western Railway, Northern, Transport for Wales and West Midlands Railway.

Drivers were warned the extreme heat was putting the UK's roads under strain. The AA said air temperatures in the low 30Cs could see asphalt stores heat up, causing roads to soften.

Nearly three-quarters of England and all of Wales are in drought, and hosepipe bans are affecting 27million customers. Hampshire, the Isle of Wight and West Sussex have gone for more than 60 days without rain.

lead a 'cost of living government' – took aim at Ofwat's decision and said customers 'cannot be treated as a blank cheque'.

'I understand why people are angry – I am too,' the Prime Minister said. 'The truth is customers have been asked to pay more for years, yet serious pollution incidents are at record levels and the pipes are still leaking.'

'Customers cannot be treated as a blank cheque. Where water companies seek to pass unnecessary costs on to households, they will be challenged.' Some 13 water

companies applied to increase bills to fund investment of £4.3billion, and Ofwat announced yesterday it had provisionally allowed five to do so for £3.4billion of new projects.

The 2.7 million people supplied by Southern Water will see bills rise by £80 over the next two years. Southern – which lost about 37 billion litres of water through leaks last year – has the most expensive bills, with customers paying an average of £759 a year after an 8 per cent rise this year. Thames Water – which Mr Burnham is expected to put into spe-

cial administration to stave off its collapse as it sinks under £20billion in debt – was also allowed to increase bills for its 16 million customers, as was Severn Trent, which services some 8 million.

Thames Water caused fresh outrage this week after it emerged it had paid a £1million signing-on fee to its new chief financial officer, Steve Buck.

Meanwhile the 1.4million people supplied by Wessex Water will see bills rise by £11 over the next two years, while the 2.3 million supplied by South East Water will see

a £1 rise. Ofwat will consult on the proposed rises until September 24, with a verdict due in December.

A spokesman said: 'We will track performance to ensure companies are delivering the expected improvements for customers and the environment. If they don't, expenditure can be clawed back.'

Southern Water and Wessex Water both said they would support customers struggling to pay. Severn Trent and South East Water said they would be reviewing the proposals.

Comment – Page 14

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Page 8

Putin's new uniform? It's just not F.A.B.

Lookalike: Virgil Tracy on the show

By Imogen Garfinkel

VLADIMIR Putin angered the Japanese yesterday with a visit to a group of disputed islands.

The Kremlin despot made his first ever trip to the Kuril Islands in the Russian Far East – prompting a 'strong' protest from Tokyo, which also claims the territory.

He had earlier overseen naval drills on the nearby Russian island of Sakhalin. However, it was the uniform he wore on board the missile cruiser Varyag that attracted attention, drawing comparisons with those from the 1960s TV puppet series. Thunderbirds, whose radio sign-off was F.A.B.

But rather than matters concerning the

Puppet dictator: Russian president Vladimir Putin at a meeting yesterday on board the missile cruiser Varyag

show's Tracy family and its disaster call-out team, International Rescue, he was holding meetings 'on ensuring the security of Russia's eastern borders'. Russian state-owned news agency RIA Novosti said.

On the Kurils, the Kremlin posted a video of the president trying caviar at a fish processing plant.

Russian-Japanese relations have been dogged by tensions over the contested

islands, known in Japan as the Northern Territories and seized by the Soviet Union in 1945. 'The Northern Territories are an inherent part of Japan's territory both historically and under international law, and the government of Japan strongly protests this visit,' the country's foreign minister Toshimitsu Motegi said in a statement.

The Soviet Union took the strategically located volcanic archipelago north of Hok-

kaido in the final days of the Second World War, and has maintained a military presence there since. In 2010, then-president Dmitry Medvedev became the first Russian leader to visit the disputed territory.

The four islands – now home to 20,000 Russians after the population of 17,000 Japanese were deported – are rich fishing grounds and have mineral deposits including gold and silver.

By Rebecca Camber Crime and Security Editor

THE head of the Crown Prosecution Service has finally apologised for failing to put predator Simon Levy behind bars and leaving him free on bail to kill two women and rape a third.

Stephen Parkinson said he was 'deeply sorry' after the 40-year-old was repeatedly bailed by police and the courts despite being accused of multiple sex attacks.

In a string of blunders, prosecutors failed to inform the courts that the convicted sex offender was being investigated for the murder of Carmenza Valencia-Trujillo and had a history of

'Failures across the system'

preying on women, resulting in him being released from custody to kill again.

Prosecutors failed to oppose bail even though detectives had warned them Levy was a danger to the public and at a high risk of reoffending.

Last year while he was out on bail, Levy murdered Ms Valencia-Trujillo, 53, before killing Sheryl Wilkins, 39, months later. He also nearly killed a third woman, suffocating her during a brutal rape, and carried out six sex attacks on the London Underground.

Amid mounting anger at how police and prosecutors missed a monster in their midst, a blame game erupted yesterday as Scotland Yard commissioner Sir Mark Rowley said: 'There's no one from the court service, no one from

CPS finally says sorry for leaving monster Levy free to kill two

Life in jail: Levy

CPS, no one from probation stepping forward and talking about their failures.'

Sir Mark told the BBC's Today programme: 'The reason we're really worried and concerned by what's going on is we're the ones

Mandarin on spot over crowded jails crisis

ANDY Burnham's top mandarin is facing questions over her role in the prison overcrowding crisis – leading to thousands of criminals being released early.

Cabinet Secretary Antonia Romeo was in charge of the Ministry of Justice (MoJ) for four years as problems mounted over plans to build more cells.

She was accused of presiding over a 'ticking timebomb' because her department knew jails were

By Martin Beckford Policy Editor

rapidly running out of space – yet the construction of new sites was delayed. When grilled by MPs last year, Dame Antonia admitted there had been a 'degree of slippage in the delivery'.

Former prison governor John Podmore said: 'She dug a big hole and Andy Burnham jumped right into it. While she was at the Minis-

try of Justice she watched it all go wrong. I didn't see any intervention that she did. The overcrowding crisis has been around for a long time but they haven't taken any responsibility.'

A government spokesman said last night: 'As Permanent Secretary at the MoJ, Antonia led the programme for new prison places, which included opening three new prisons with over 4,500 new prison places.'

who see victims day in and day out... We had a case the other day of a sex offender who should have been remanded in custody bailed to an address two doors down from his victim.'

But Mr Parkinson, the Director

of Public Prosecutions, hit back, saying different parts of the justice system should stop 'taking shots at each other'.

He added: 'I think the Metropolitan Police commissioner is absolutely right to recognise that

there have been failures across the criminal justice system, and we are responsible for part of that, so I do want to acknowledge our failures and apologise.' Levy is now serving a whole life sentence for the rape and murders.

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Page 9

Mother dies in Turkey after a bum lift she agreed to on spur of moment

By Jack Hardy

A MOTHER-OF-THREE who died after cosmetic surgery on her bottom in Turkey had been tempted by a cut-price deal five minutes before the operation, an inquest heard yesterday.

Hayley Dowell, 38, suffered medical complications at a clinic in Istanbul, where she had intended to receive liposuction and a tummy tuck.

A coroner criticised how she was given an 'upselling' offer of a Brazilian Butt Lift (BBL) shortly before her surgery.

She is thought to be one of six Britons who died in Turkey in 2023 after medical procedures that went wrong. The country is popular for its reduced prices on cosmetic surgery but has been the subject of warnings by UK health officials.

Coroner Nicholas Walker said the trainee dental nurse was given five minutes to decide on 'what to do and how to pay for it' - a high-pressure sales tactic he said would not be allowed in the UK.

Mrs Dowell, from Eastleigh, Hampshire, decided to undergo the BBL in addition to the other procedures in a package costing more than £7,000 because she was 'very self-conscious of her body'.

Pathologists concluded she died due to a fat embolism from the liposuction. Her husband Neil

Dowell told Winchester Coroner's Court he did not believe she had signed a consent form to undergo the BBL prior to her operation.

A BBL increases the size and shape of a person's bottom by removing fat from one area and transferring it to their buttocks.

It was heard the surgeon told Mrs Dowell he could take the fat he was removing during the liposuction and use it to enhance her bottom, offering her £1,000 off the

BBL. Giving his conclusions, the coroner said the operation took 'much less time' than it would have done in the UK. He added that the surgeon, Dr Salih Basat, did not inform Mrs Dowell of the risks associated with a BBL.

He said 'upselling' of cosmetic procedures was banned in Britain and a surgeon would need consent from the patient as well as a 14-day cooling-off period before a final decision. He added: 'My con-

Tragic: Hayley Dowell. Left, her grieving husband at court yesterday

cerns are that a UK citizen can travel abroad for surgery without knowing the risks of the procedures before they get on the plane.

'The upselling combined with a price reduction, and with limited time, doesn't allow for proper consent. These limit reasoned

'Five minutes to decide'

thought, proper reflection, research or consultation.'

Mr Walker said he would send a Prevention of Future Deaths report to the Health Secretary and the General Medical Council.

The inquest heard Mr and Mrs Dowell arrived in Turkey on October 1, 2023. She went under the knife at the private BHT

Clinic the following day and died just after midnight on October 3.

Mrs Dowell had already undergone two breast augmentations in the UK. Her husband said: 'After three children she wanted a flat stomach, and she was always concerned about the weight.'

Minutes before she was due to have her op, the surgeon asked if she wanted him to put some of the fat from the liposuction into her bottom as 'it was a little flat'.

Mr Dowell said a woman then arrived with a card reader to ask for the money. He said: 'We had five minutes to decide that.'

Shortly before midnight, he was informed that his wife had suffered two cardiac arrests. He was told to say his goodbyes and she passed away a short while later.

The BHT Clinic declined to give evidence at the inquest.

Hold it right there! Trump's ICE agents to get electric shock gloves

DONALD Trump's immigration crackdown will now see officers armed with gloves that deliver powerful electric shocks.

The US Department of Homeland Security said $20million (£14.8million) will be spent on thousands of the 'distraction and de-escalation devices'.

Known as a Generated Low Output Voltage Emitter (GLOVE), they incapacitate people with a 380-volt jolt. The move follows intense criticism of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents using aggressive tactics to apprehend suspects.

Officials and civil rights groups branded the plans 'unnecessary and cruel'. New York Attorney General Letitia James, a Democrat, said 'we are outraged' and

By Isabella Machin

warned ICE officers who misuse the gloves in her state could face criminal consequences.

The gloves have already been used by some US police departments and in prisons. While they are marketed as non-lethal and safe for the heart, a pending

'Unnecessary and cruel'

lawsuit alleges that a 43-year-old man died in 2024 after he was shocked 27 times with the gloves and 13 times by a taser at a prison in Richmond, Kentucky. An internal investigation by the Madison County Detention

Center found two of the glove shocks lasted 45 and 99 seconds - far more than the recommended 15-second limit. 'These actions not only inflicted unnecessary pain but heightened the risk of serious health complications,' the investigation found.

Two other lawsuits were filed alleging injuries from the gloves, pictured - a man with heart issues who was shocked at a Las Vegas trade show and a defendant in court who said he was laughed at after being shocked. Both cases were dismissed. The man-

manufacturer says the device should not be used on 'the elderly, small children, pregnant women and the severely handicapped'.

The user manual also warns it should not be used in response to verbal defiance, or for 'punishment, torture or horseplay'.

Ex-ICE director John Sandweg said 'it's too easy for this to get misused against a population that doesn't pose a threat'. But the Department of Homeland Security said 'every decision is made with careful consideration'.

Compliant Technologies LLC, the GLOVE manufacturer, declined to comment.

You beauty... Expert's joy at moth find

Daily Mail Reporter

FOR one expert, searching for a rare species of insect had spanned his entire adult life.

So discovering a population of dark bordered beauty moths on a site it hasn't been seen for 70 years was a 'career highlight'.

Dr Dave Wainwright, of Butterfly Conservation, finally tracked down the elusive creature at the National Trust's Wallington Estate in Northumberland.

For decades, the only place in England the custard and chocolate day moth could be found was Strensall Common in North Yorkshire, with two sites in Scotland. 'It only took ten minutes to find the first, then we all started picking them up,' he said.

Wallington Estate ranger Emily Johnson said 'we couldn't be more excited'.

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Page 10

A-LEVEL RESULTS

Pupils do the maths

By Eleanor Harding and Antonio Jarne Cubero

PUPILS are prioritising job prospects over a 'love of learning' as a record one in eight A-level entries are now for maths, experts said yesterday.

As hundreds of thousands of pupils picked up their results, maths entries were up 3.9 per cent, helping to drive top grades

Students put careers over 'love of learning' as grades hit record high

to a record high. Results show 28.5 per cent of entries graded at A and A, while 9.6 per cent were graded at A only. That means both figures had risen for the

third year running. Exam chiefs put the increase down to more students taking maths, which traditionally scores higher than arts and humanities. Meanwhile, the number of students choosing to study engineering – considered a good course for future earning potential – rose 14 per cent to 35,000.

Maths, which had 115,380 entries, has been the most popular subject since 2014 while English literature, which was previously top, has been in steady decline.

Economics is now the fifth-most popular choice for students, up from tenth place in 2025 – a 10.5 per cent increase.

Sir Ian Bauckham, head of exam regulator Ofqual, said: 'These are all subjects that have a very strong either vocational flavour or are proven to be linked to higher earning potential, and in students' minds will be associated with the trends that we're seeing in the economy.

'So, I do think it's plausible to suggest that those considerations are, for most, in students' minds.'

A record number of applicants – 446,690 – were also accepted on to university courses, up from 439,180 last year, according to admissions body Ucas. Its chief executive Dr Jo

Saxton said: 'The love of learning used to be the top reason [for choosing a course].

'Now we're seeing going to university as an investment in my future career, that is absolutely the thing that is at the top.'

Lee Elliot Major, professor of social mobility at the University of Exeter, said: 'Students are increasingly choosing subjects with one eye on the labour market. That's entirely understandable.

'In a world of rising living costs, student debt and AI, they want confidence that their investment of time and money will lead to a fulfilling and secure career.'

The change in pupils' choices comes after the previous Tory government made data publicly available for the first time showing which degree subjects lead to the best employment rates and salaries.

Maths-related subjects have some of the best returns while English produces some of the worst.

Former prime minister Rishi Sunak campaigned for a greater focus on maths in schools.

The grades are the highest ever

Celebration: Gina Stancheva with

recorded outside of the Covid years of 2020-2022 when marks were vastly inflated due to teacher assessment in the place of traditional exams.

Iain Mansfield, from think-tank Policy Exchange, said in his view the results rise was evidence of grade inflation returning, which was 'disappointing'. He added: 'Grade inflation appears to have re-established itself as an intrinsic part of the system, just as it had in the 1990s and 2000s – and the Government needs to get a grip or confidence in the top grades will be undermined.'

Among private schools, 48.6 per

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Page 11

to help pick up jobs

'Strictest head' in UK gets 70% As and A*s

Bugging: Grace Lewis in Ebbw Vale

Shock: Sholme Roy at London Academy

Proud: TV's Ulrika Jonsson and son Malcolm with his results

LOOKING FOR A COURSE?

Don't miss the Daily Mail's definitive guide to every university in Britain

DAILYMAIL.COM/UNI

her BTEC art and design practices results at Barking in Essex

cent of entries were at A or above, up from 48.4 last year. Meanwhile, entries graded A and above at state-run academies decreased to 23.5 per cent from 26.5 per cent, and comprehensives increased to 23 per cent from 22.6 per cent.

Results were also released for technical qualifications T-levels, which saw numbers rise to 20,000 students, up from 12,000.

Prime Minister Andy Burnham, who has been in favour of promoting vocational routes,

said on social media: 'Whatever it says in those envelopes, you should be proud of the hard work that got you here. And remember, there isn't just one route to success.'

■ THE Earl of Wessex, son of Prince Edward and Sophie, is heading to the Royal Agricultural University after receiving his A-level results. The 18-year-old will study rural land and property management at Cirencester, Gloucestershire, starting this autumn. Officials did not reveal his exam grades.

By Colin Fernandez

BRITAIN'S strictest headteacher is celebrating her pupils achieving almost 70 per cent A and A* grades – more than double the national average.

Katharine Birbalsingh runs Michaela Community School in Brent, north-west London.

Her school beat the national average of just 28.5 per cent of entries getting A and A* – despite serving one of the most deprived communities in the country.

It comes after the new Education Secretary, Lucy Powell, said forcing schools to prioritise academic learning was 'letting down' disadvantaged pupils.

Tory education spokesman Laura Trott wrote on X: 'Looking forward to Lucy Powell explaining how these results will be detrimental to the children involved.'

A third of the school's entries were graded A* – against a national average of 9.6 per cent.

And 10 per cent of Ms Birbalsingh's pupils got all A*s, with two securing Oxbridge places.

Some 90 per cent of entries were graded at A* to B, and students achieved an average of AAA across all subjects.

Ms Birbalsingh said: 'We are delighted with these fantastic results – 11 per cent of students are going to study medicine, 85 per cent will be going off to Russell Group universities.'

The school's success has been attributed to its level of discipline, with all new students taking part in a behaviour 'boot camp'.

Success: Katharine Birbalsingh

The New Zealand-born headteacher, who went to Oxford, set up the school in 2014 with the aim of giving disadvantaged children the same academic education that private school children enjoy.

However, last week, Ms Powell claimed schools focusing on the traditional academic subjects had led to millions of children being branded a 'failure again and again'.

She said this was the reason for recent figures showing a million young people not in formal study, training or work. This is despite maths, English and the sciences being favoured by both top universities and employers.

Last year, Ms Birbalsingh accused former education secretary Bridget Phillipson of being 'blinded by Marxist ideology' following a move to curb the freedoms of academies.

Comment – Page 14

Boys outdo girls for top marks

BOYS have achieved more top A-level grades than girls – driven by higher male entry in maths, science and technology.

Some 28.9 per cent of boys' entries received A or A grades this year compared to 28 per cent for girls. Boys previously led at A from 2012 to 2019, before girls moved ahead during the pandemic – leading by nearly 5

percentage points in 2021 – until boys reclaimed the lead in 2023.

Professor Alan Smithers, of the Centre for Education and Employment Research at the University of Buckingham, said: 'The growth of quantitative subjects appears to be behind changes in the relative success of the sexes. Boys are much more likely to take them, and they do better in them.'

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Page 12

WAR ON MIDDLE CLASS

Kemi: Burnham's migrants plan just proves he'll betray those who don't back Labour

KEMI Badenoch has accused Andy Burnham of putting illegal migrants in middle-class areas to punish residents for not voting Labour.

The Tory leader claimed the Prime Minister believes people living in 'quaint villages' do not support his party and, therefore, must 'lump' the arrival of hundreds of men who have crossed the Channel in boats.

She likened his 'rotten principle' to Reform's recent proposal to put detention centres in places that vote for the Green Party.

Mrs Badenoch said despite his 'more upbeat' demeanour, Mr Burnham was 'just as bad' as his predecessor Sir Keir Starmer, leading the same old Labour that is still the party of the 'spiteful class warrior'.

Her comments come after the PM defended the controversial plan to set up a camp for 1,250 male asylum seekers on the site of a former military base near the Oxfordshire village of

'PM is copying Reform policy'

Piddington – population 400 and in a Lib Dem constituency. His Government is also planning to move a similar number of migrants to disused RAF Linton-on-Ouse, within a Tory-held North Yorkshire constituency.

Mr Burnham declared that middle England would have to take in more migrants as 'we cannot have a situation where it's only the poorest communities in the country that receive all of the dispersal of refugees and asylum seekers'.

He is said to be determined to change the current system, in which many asylum seekers are put up in Houses in Multiple Occupation in deprived English towns, even though it will 'cost more money to do it fairly'.

Home Office minister Anna Turley also said that housing asylum seekers in areas with 'cheaper' housing has 'created real civil unrest'.

But writing in the Daily Mail, Mrs Badenoch said the real reason for the policy was political.

She said, 'Burnham is essentially copying a Reform UK policy, his only difference being the target.

In May, Nigel Farage proposed putting migrant-detention centres in Green-voting areas. Burnham has chosen to put illegal migrants in quiet middle-class villages that don't vote Labour.'

Even a Labour MP has now spoken out against the plan for a migrant camp in Linton-on-Ouse.

Rachael Maskell said it would create a ratio of six men to every woman in the 600-person village next to the former air force station. She

COMMENTARY

By Kemi Badenoch

LEADER OF THE OPPOSITION

THE next time you hear Labour tell you that the Government's measures to tackle illegal immigration are 'working', think of Piddington.

This tiny Oxfordshire village is mulling the extraordinary step of seceding from the United Kingdom, because the Government is about to dump 1,250 adult male asylum seekers in a nearby Ministry of Defence site.

If the idea of a leafy English village with a population of 400 becoming an independent country sounds absurd, it's only slightly less absurd than the Labour Government seeking to force that same village to accept four times its population in illegal immigrants without any say in the matter.

But Piddington is only the start. This week, our new Prime Minister announced that Britain's small towns and villages should start preparing for Labour to drop thousands of unwelcome visitors on their doorsteps. Andy Burnham claims that it can't just be the 'poorest communities' that are forced to house thousands of illegal immigrants, adding: 'All parts of the country need to play their part.'

He won't like me pointing this out, but Burnham is essentially copying a Reform UK policy, his only difference being the target. In May, Nigel Farage proposed putting migrant-detention centres in Green-voting areas while sparing places that elected Reform MPs.

Burnham has chosen to put illegal migrants in quiet middle-class villages that don't vote Labour. Same rotten principle.

But then again, we shouldn't be surprised. Burnham has arrived in Westminster with a more upbeat and chummy demeanour but he's still leading the same old Labour Party.

The party that introduced VAT on school fees, meaning many children now won't be going to the schools they love this September – keeps the spiteful class warrior Bridget Phillipson in the Cabinet.

The same Labour Party that said it wouldn't raise taxes on 'working people' – then hiked employers' national insurance, putting businesses under enormous strain

also pointed out the base was next to a primary school and nursery and was served by only four buses a day to York, the city she represents.

Last night a Labour source hit back at Mrs Badenoch, saying: 'This takes some brass neck from the party who lost control of illegal migration and put 56,000 asylum seekers in 400 hotels, costing the British people £9million a day.'

A Government spokesman added: 'We are closing every

asylum hotel and moving asylum seekers into basic accommodation, including former military sites.

'The total number of asylum seekers in accommodation is decreasing, and the number of asylum seekers in hotels has fallen by 35 per cent in the last year. Asylum costs are already down by £1billion under this Government. We are working to fairly house asylum seekers across the country.'

Comment – Page 14

LEAFY VILLAGES SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BEAR BRUNT OF THIS CRISIS

with many having to close or move abroad, taking their jobs with them. The Labour Party has never understood how hard it is to run a business. In fact, most of the Cabinet have never worked outside of the public or charity sectors.

The message from Burnham's Labour is clear: the people of Piddington, or Linton-on-Ouse in Yorkshire, or various other quaint villages near RAF bases, aren't Labour people, so they are just going to have to lump it.

I know what it's like for an unsuspecting community to suddenly have hundreds of illegal immigrants arrive unannounced. As an Essex MP I was particularly annoyed by Labour reopening the Bell Hotel as an asylum hotel in Epping, which the Conservatives had closed. That annoyance turned to fury after one of the migrants sexually assaulted a local girl.

I spoke to people in Epping. I met some of the parents terrified for their children's safety. No one should be forced to see their local area become a no-go zone overnight, where it's not safe for young women and children. Yet this is what Burnham is telling large parts of the country they now have to stomach.

The last Conservative government has to share some of the blame for the number of illegals in Britain. We tried everything we could to stop the boats, but nothing got past the courts. We had some success in

deterring migrants with the Rwanda scheme, but in an act of extreme stupidity, Labour cancelled it on the first day after the general election.

Only one thing will solve this problem – dealing with the European Convention on Human Rights (ECHR). That is why I have changed Conservative Party policy, and we are now going to leave the ECHR so that everyone who arrives in Britain illegally is quickly deported. Labour's policy is dispersal, ours is removal.

UNLIKE other political parties, who talk the talk but don't do the hard work required to make sure that their plans can actually be implemented, we have prepared a 200-page report explaining how we would leave the ECHR definitively.

This is my priority, while other party leaders waste time with pointless by-elections or, in Burnham's case, trying to make Netflix cheaper.

Only the Conservatives believe that communities should not have to bear the consequences of the illegal-migrant crisis.

While Andy Burnham wants to punish the towns and villages that didn't vote Labour and Farage wants to punish those who won't vote Reform, I want to unite the country – and offer everyone a brighter future under the Conservatives.

Furious Piddington bites back

VILLAGERS about to be outnumbered by an influx of 1,250 migrants have hit out at Andy Burnham's plans to house more in middle-class areas.

Residents in Piddington, Oxfordshire, are furious about proposals to open a migrant camp at a nearby former military barracks and have voted to stage a symbolic referendum on leaving the UK as part of their protest. The vote was backed by the parish council, with its

By Olivia Christie and Matt Strudwick

chairman, Tim McNally, saying people are fed up with not being listened to. Villagers say the plans are inappropriate, impractical and unnecessary.

Mr McNally said: 'The men will be allowed out during the day. We are near HMP Bullington but that is locked up. The asylum site is not.'

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Page 13

by Sue Reid

THE monster boat that carried 230 illegal migrants to our shores this week is now rolled up like a farmer's hay bale at a Government warehouse not far from Britain's south coast.

Border Force officials have been told by ministers to keep the huge inflatable, made of the same PVC used for a children's bouncy castle, out of view as public fury erupted over its arrival on Monday.

Dramatic photos of the mega-dinghy, released by the French sea rescue services, show migrants on board crushed together like sardines, bare feet suspended over the side, as the inflatable sags under the weight of its human cargo.

The 15-metre vessel, longer than a double-decker bus, with enough passengers to fill an airliner, is the biggest ever to reach us during the eight-year Channel migration crisis - and the latest sign that the trafficking gangs have not been 'smashed', as Labour promised, but retain the upper hand.

In the Government hideaway, the boat will now have had a number painted in white on its side, denoting that it is the 29Wh traffickers' vessel to be brought in at the ports of Dover or Ramsgate in Kent since the beginning of this year.

The huge inflatable will be measured and forensically examined by Border Force immigration experts to ascertain its origins. Their detective work is expected to find that it came from a factory in eastern China and was made to order for a price of £2,000.

People smuggling is a global enterprise, which has ferried more than 200,000 illegal migrants into Britain since the small-boat records began in 2018.

Five years ago, the Daily Mail tracked in forensic detail the trafficking gangs' operations, exposing their ruthless efficiency at running what was described to us as a 'military campaign'.

We were told by an undercover officer working for the National Crime Agency (NCA) and its European counterparts. The British public think the migrants are buying the odd boat from a French coast hypermarket and launching from the beaches.

'The reality is that we are fighting international organised crime. The bosses at the top are multilingual, highly intelligent, sophisticated men of all nationalities. They don't care a lot for the migrants; they only want the money each one brings.'

Another undercover officer, based in the Netherlands, added: 'The network is so secretive that the junior trafficker pushing the migrant onto the boat, even waving a gun to hurry him along, has no inkling of the name of the next guy up the chain. They all use pseudonyms, right up to the king-pins making millions from a slick,

REVEALED: The 6,000 mile odyssey of the megadiglies made in China

organised crime that financially outstrips drug-running.

The Channel traffickers' business model is run with the efficiency of a winning army. The planning is meticulous. It is a 'just in time' operation copied from the car factories.

'A boat is brought to the beach, then inflated by the gang with an electric pump, just before the migrants arrive at the identical spot to set off.'

Now, the Daily Mail has investigated where the boats come from, who manufactures them and how they get to the beaches in a 6,000-mile journey across continents, seas, border points and some of the harshest terrain in the world.

The factories in Weihai and Qingdao port regions of eastern China have become a hotspot for inflatable boat making, ostensibly

for leisure use on inland waterways and seashores.

Last year, Yamar Outdoors Product Company, which is based in Weihai, was financially sanctioned by the British Government for the suspected sale of 'immigrant' boats to Channel trafficking gangs.

This week, however, it was reported that the factory's inflatables are still for sale online and being churned out in any size to order. Our investigation reveals that the boats are often dispatched from these factories using cross-border logistics firms, which run lorries through Asia.

The boats are rolled up in a plastic covering and remain uninflated for the 21-day trip by road and ferry. A journey by sea isn't unheard of - but it takes up to 40 days on a container ship headed

to the Malacca Strait and into the Indian Ocean, then north through the Red Sea and Suez Canal and into the Mediterranean.

Each truck crosses China and then the vastness of Kazakhstan, arriving at the Caspian Sea, where the driver takes a roll-on/roll-off cargo ferry to Azerbaijan. From there, it heads for Georgia, entering Turkey on the Black Sea coast at what is called the Sarp border crossing.

Having travelled through Turkey (and this is where the road route joins the maritime route, docking in Istanbul), the dinghy-carrying lorry comes to the Bulgarian border post of Kapitan Andreevo.

One of the busiest checkpoints in the world, this is not just the gateway to Bulgaria but the EU's Schengen Area. Little wonder that it is reportedly infiltrated by

Packed like sardines: The huge dinghy carrying 230 migrants that arrived in UK on Monday

organised crime syndicates, which may well be paid by the traffickers to nod the illicit cargo through without any awkward questions.

It then heads on to Serbia where the lorry temporarily leaves the EU before re-entering the bloc. Unencumbered by border checks, it is then a straight run through Croatia, Slovenia and Austria, before climbing the Alps and entering Germany at the village of Walserberg, near Salzburg.

Seven hours later, the truck arrives in North Rhine-Westphalia, a region named by Britain's NCA and the pan-continent police force Europol as a key hub for the trafficking operation.

There, the gangs hide the boats in industrial warehouses, on small farms or in residential garages until they are called to the beaches on a day when the weather is right for crossings.

When the signal comes, traffickers inspect a still-deflated boat before putting it in a small delivery van for its journey to the Channel coastline. The vans are used to avoid the attention of French and Belgian police who presume they are local vehicles.

They are often driven by 'rogue' foreign couriers, sometimes illegal themselves, who are hired for cash and based in Germany or the Netherlands. Once they complete the drop, they head for home as quickly as they arrive.

The people smugglers on the beach usually bury the boat in the sand to await the arrival of migrants, perhaps a day later. But the operations are now so slick that the boat is often inflated immediately as waiting migrants run out of the dunes to carry it themselves to the sea.

Those migrants will have come a long way, from the Middle East, sub-Saharan Africa and south Asia. But the boat has been on a longer journey still and is a vital component in the Channel human trafficking trade.

SO enterprising are the people smugglers that they change tactics to deceive UK and European authorities. Just last month, Border Force seized 25 inflatables and outboards, all Chinese-made and bound for Hamburg, during a raid at the port of Felixstowe in Suffolk.

After the monster boat's arrival on Monday, Labour's new border security chief Anna Turley said that huge inflatables carrying hundreds 'must not become the norm'.

Yet, the truth is that it's highly unlikely that the mega-dinghy was a one-off order placed with its Chinese makers. Lying in a German outbuilding today, there may be others just as big - and more on their way.

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Page 14

Daily Mail

COMMENT

The water industry is polluted by greed

AMID widespread hosepipe bans, yet another jump in water bills is a particularly hitter pill.

There is no doubt that water companies are not working in the way they should.

Leakage rates are an abomination and there has not been nearly enough investment in other infrastructure such as new reservoirs. Water company directors are truismring huge salaries and bonuses, while the regulator sits idly by.

Something has to change. Commercial customers have the liberty to choose their water supplier, just as they can hear providers of gas and electricity.

So why do residential customers not have the same flexibility and instead find themselves handcuffed to one underperforming water monopoly?

Surely a solution to this never-ending misery of rising bills would be to find a way to open up the residential market, too, helping drive down prices through competition and innovation.

One policy that will absolutely not help is renationalisation – at a projected cost of £140billion – unless the goal is glasses of brown drinking water all round.

Andy Burnham has expressed a vague desire to shake up utility companies as part of his plan to tackle the cost of living.

Rather than looking to the gas and electricity market – which is working tolerably well – the Prime Minister should make an urgent, sensible start with our rapacious, dysfunctional water companies.

Burnham's class war

KEMI Badenoch is right to say in her article for the Daily Mail today that Labour is still the party of the spiteful class warrior.

The Government has vindictively imposed VAT on private school fees and nobbled private enterprise with a host of new taxes and red tape.

Now Mr Burnham wants to foist thousands of illegal immigrants upon towns and villages which are less likely to vote for his party.

The Conservative leader points out this is the same strategy advocated by Reform, which has said it would locate migrant detention centres in Green-voting areas.

Policy driven by malice is never the solution, especially when this particular issue is so divisive, costly and difficult.

Rather than using the consequences of the Channel crisis as a means of punishment, Labour should instead direct its attention to stopping migrants arriving here in the first place.

ALL the hard-working young people who received their A-level results yesterday are to be warmly congratulated.

There shall be no praise, however, for new Education Secretary Lucy Powell after her absurd remarks last week about how an emphasis on academic learning was 'letting down' disadvantaged pupils.

Contrast her twisted view of the world with results posted by the Michaela Community School where, under 'Britain's strictest head teacher' Katharine Birbalsingh, 70 per cent of pupils obtained A and A* grades despite it serving one of the country's most deprived communities.

Good exam results can be a springboard to an accomplished and productive life, especially for those who come from an underprivileged background.

There are always those for whom other routes will be a better fit, which is why there should be a growing emphasis on technical qualifications in parallel with more traditional academic pursuits.

But talking down knowledge, as Ms Powell seems to have been doing, will serve no good at all.

Rayner's overhaul of zero-hours contracts is a £3 billion assault that proves when it comes to business, Labour really does have...

IMAGINE if Argentina hadn't scored in the 85th minute of this summer's World Cup semi-final.

England were 1-0 up and only five minutes away from reaching their first World Cup final in 40 years – and pub landlords across the country were moments from securing their biggest trading day in recent history.

Publicans would have been scrambling to get extra staff behind the bar for finals day on July 19. Every table would have been booked out and the beer gardens would have been crowded out.

But then Argentina scored – twice. I don't mean to remind you of the heartbreak. But, as former chief executive of Young's Pubs, it was a perfect example of something successive Labour governments seem unable – or unwilling – to understand: Running a pub is an unpredictable business.

One goal in a football tournament can boost your takings for a month. So can unexpected heatwaves – plenty of which we've seen this summer – while a rainy bank holiday can deliver a blow to profits. In other words, it's impossible for a landlord to predict how many people will be needed behind the bar on any given day.

Nasty

Yet under Andy Burnham's planned crackdown on zero-hours contracts, that is exactly what publicans will be expected to do – paying workers to stand idle, in an industry that already runs on wafer-thin margins.

The Government is 'consulting' on proposals, spearheaded by the newly reinstated Cabinet minister Angela Rayner, architect of the loathed Employment Rights Bill, that could give new rights to all workers on zero-hours contracts.

At present, such deals do not specify a minimum number of hours to which workers are entitled. But Rayner's reforms would force companies to give staff a guaranteed number of hours per week, reflecting the hours they currently work.

It would also require firms to give workers 'reasonable notice of shifts' and to pay them for shifts that have been 'cancelled, curtailed or moved at short notice'.

I wrote in these pages at the beginning of the year that the last Labour govern-

ZENY

GOOD

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by Patrick Dardis

ment, under Keir Starmer, was waging a cruel and unending war of attrition against the British boozer.

Under Starmer, Labour cut the business-rates relief on which pubs relied from 75 per cent to 49 per cent. Employers' National Insurance was hiked from 13.8 to 15 per cent, while the threshold at which we had to start paying it was slashed from £9,100 to just £5,000.

The National Living Wage jumped another 6.7 per cent – with the minimum wage for 18 to 20-year-olds, who make up much of many pubs' employees, soaring by more than 16 per cent.

For an industry already battered by the Covid pandemic, rampant inflation and a 57 per cent rise in average utility bills over five years, it was yet another vicious hammer blow. Tragically, it proved fatal for many: British pubs have been disappearing at a rate of nearly two a day this year.

And anyone who thought Andy Burnham might put an end to Labour's shameful war on British pubs is in for a nasty shock – however many pork scratchings our shallow new Prime Minister is photographed crunching for the benefit of his social media followers.

He may have pledged a 20 per cent cut to business rates for pubs from April – but at the same time, he's brewing up something that will have a far more sinister effect on our industry. Ministers have said that under the plans, any worker who regularly clocks up to 20 hours a week should have the right to be offered a contract guaranteeing them a minimum number of hours.

It could go further still. Burnham's Government is consulting on whether the policy should apply to those working up to 40 hours per week, with the consultation closing next week.

On Wednesday, the Government finally revealed just how much this reckless proposal could cost businesses. Its own 'official impact assessment' found that the reforms 'could make it harder for employers to respond to changes in demand' and estimated that the 'direct cost' to employers – taking in guaranteed hours, a reasonable notice of shifts and compensation for cancellations – could reach £2.9billion per year.

Shock

It also, unsurprisingly, found that sectors such as hospitality and retail would bear the brunt of the changes.

But it's not just bosses who will pay the price.

Of course, zero-hours contracts have their downsides. Nobody should defend unscrupulous employers who use them to keep workers permanently on tenterhooks and cancel shifts at the last minute.

For an enormous number of people, however, these contracts offer vital flexibility.

On Wednesday night, I was at The King's Head Inn in Bledington, Gloucestershire (in my view, one of the country's greatest pubs), where I often prop myself up at the bar and chat to the landlord, Archie, about how business is going. Archie has two university-age sons and hopes that, one day, one of them might even take over the

family business. When they come home for the holidays, he gives them shifts behind the bar – all properly recorded on the books, of course – allowing them to

earn extra pocket money. It is an arrangement that suits everyone. Archie gets an extra pair of hands when the pub is busy and his sons get paid work

when they want it, without having to commit to fixed hours during term time.

Youth unemployment is already at its highest level in more than a decade – and Burnham has, supposedly, made getting more youngsters into work or training one of his first priorities as Prime Minister.

In my role as CEO of Young's Pubs, which has more than 270 establishments across the country, I employed thousands of young people over the decades. So I know just how valuable these casual shifts can be.

A few hours collecting used glasses or pulling pints might not sound like valuable work to our Cambridge-educated Prime Minister. But for a teenager, it can be their first taste of the working world. If Andy Burnham is serious about getting young people into work, the last thing he should be doing is loading businesses up with yet more red tape and paperwork – and giving already hard-pressed employees yet another reason to reconsider giving them a job.

And it's not just youngsters. Archie also gives a few shifts each month to Pamela, a woman who lives nearby. She has a young child and can't commit to a regular weekly rota. But when she has the time and Archie needs some help, she can pick up a shift – and she's grateful for the extra money it brings in at a time when prices are going up. Again, what's not to like?

Labour claims to have consulted widely on this policy. I struggle to believe they spoke to people like Archie or Pamela.

No, judging by the proposals it seems, as usual for Labour, that the unions dominated discussions with precious little thought given to the people in need of wages or those creating the jobs.

Andy Burnham entered No 10 vowing to 'make our high streets fire new symbol of Britain's 'renaissance'. Instead, he's making absolutely sure that their beating hearts – the great British pub – will be ripped out for good.

■ PATRICK Dardis is the former CEO of Young's Pubs

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Page 15

Why would 'Professor Plagiarism' make such outlandish claims?

WHY lie? I don't mean the small, social lies that keep things running smoothly, but what are alleged to be enormous ones – invented academic posts, fabricated childhood, feats of endurance that never happened.

And having decided to lie, why choose stories so extravagant that they invite disbelief, and so specific that anybody with a spare afternoon and an internet connection can take them apart?

These are questions I've been asked about the allegations facing Jason Arday, who resigned last week from his position as professor of sociology education at Cambridge, after the university announced an investigation into his qualifications.

He denies being a liar, he has explanations for his claims about endurance running and fundraising, and when Liverpool John Moores University examined plagiarism allegations against his 2015 doctorate they were not upheld. Nothing has been proved against him and the investigations remain open.

I should say that I've never met Jason Arday, and so have no idea what has been going on in his mind, or how much truth there may or may not be in his life story. But having spent 20 years as a psychiatrist listening to people who tell me things that turn out not to be true, I can speak generally about why people find themselves in similar situations, because the pattern is well established.

There is an old descriptive psychiatric term, pseudologia fantastica, coined in the 1890s for people whose lies are elaborate, sustained and built around a fantasised version of themselves rather than for obvious material gain.

You may think that hardly fits here, given this story apparently brought Jason Arday a professorial chair, several honorary doctorates and, he claimed, a 1.4 million book deal.

BUT the gain is usually a by-product of this pattern of behaviour rather than the object, and you can usually tell this from the type of lies.

Someone who, for instance, wants a certain job often embroiled their qualifications. But they stop there, as anything beyond that is pure risk, and tall tales about marathons they've run, funds they've raised and the desperate childhood they've endured do little for a selection panel except draw questions that up the chance of being caught out.

The people I've met who fit the description of pseudologia fantastica tend not to stop lying. They are seldom cold or calculating. They tend to be charming and, perhaps most importantly, fragile underneath. What strikes me most is how often they appear to half-believe the story they've invented. The lie is not really being told to the listener at all, it is being told to the ego of the person telling it. The listener is only there to confirm it.

Lying, I think, starts with the memory, which is not really a straightforward recording of life's experiences, more a reconstruction of events. Every time we remember or retrieve something from our memory, we rebuild it and return it slightly altered. All

Investigations: Jason Arday receives his honorary doctorate at St Mary's University

DR MAXPEMBERTON has been a psychiatrist for 20 years. Here he examines the questions facing Jason Arday and says there's one condition that could explain everything

of us do this, because in our minds we tend to shift to the version of ourselves we want to be.

Someone comfortable in their own skin has little to gain from the process, so the edits stay small. Someone who is not comfortable will find that each retelling shaves away a little more of the person they cannot stand being, and by the time a story has been told two hundred times it has not only been changed but rehearsed so much it eventually begins to feel like a real memory.

The stories are hardly ever straightforward boasts of success either, because someone who simply claims to be clever or rich invites envy – and envy is not what these people are looking for. Instead the tales are about suffering that has been overcome,

odds that were insurmountable, the diagnosis nobody believed, the childhood that should not have been survived, and then the triumph over all this. It is a far more effective structure for any fantasy, because it makes doubting it feel like an act of cruelty.

It is also the structure our whole culture of aspiration is built on, the one that fills memoirs and Ted talks and the back-stories on TV talent shows. This is why anyone constructing an identity out of borrowed material will reach for the template. It's the stuff of fairytales and legends, the struggle in the face of adversity, a struggle that demonstrates positive things about an individual's personality and inner character.

I once saw a man, and I have changed key details that might identify him, who had claimed to

the woman he married that he was a barrister. He left the house in a suit every morning and came home with stories about court.

What struck me was that he could not tell me exactly when he had decided to lie. There had been a conversation at a party where somebody misheard him and he did not correct them.

It's easy to see how it can happen. It was a series of slow, incremental lies that built and built.

Each time he got positive feedback from those around him and he embellished a little more. Each time the feedback provided a sort of affirmation until the story had grown into something unrecognisable from where it started.

It was after this that he met his future wife and had to double down on the deception. When I

saw him he had spent almost a decade maintaining a fictional life that had begun with an innocuous misunderstanding at a party.

There is a neurological basis to this. Researchers at University College London put volunteers in a scanner and let them lie for their own benefit.

They found the amygdala, an area of the brain that drives emotional response to wrongdoing, lit up strongly at the first lie, then less after each one.

The size of that fading response predicted the size of the next lie. Our brain starts to extinguish that awkward, guilty feeling. The guard-rails that prevent us living out a fantasy are easily moved by incremental falsehoods.

Why do the stories become so extravagant? Part of it is this notion that an audience gets used to them, just as the exponent of the lie does. So what produced gasps last year produces only nods this time, and applause that has stopped coming leaves an empty feeling.

SO the story has to grow, and it grows in whatever direction was rewarded most loudly last time. You can't backtrack once a story is out there, you can only embellish and elaborate.

Why do people make up stories that are so easily disproved? A common would never do that, as the object is to get away with it. The fantasist is running no calculation at all, as there is no auditor or moderator in their head.

The only person they picture on the other side of their story is somebody looking impressed. A claim is not weighed for whether it will survive scrutiny, it is weighed for whether it will trigger the required impression and response. The claims that do best in that regard are precisely the ones nobody sensible would invent.

Every fantasist I've known kept going with their stories long past the point where anybody was still convinced, because the alternative was to confess it was a sham and allow people to destroy the false identity they had built for themselves, so become a nobody.

Which is why, if Jason Arday is found to have lied, I won't feel triumphant. When a world collapses it is a terrible thing to live through.

He built it and must answer for it. But he did not build it on his own, and the institutions – not least Cambridge University and the diversity, equality and inclusion industry – that made him their poster boy and handed him the bricks have gone very quiet.

For that they bear considerable responsibility in this sorry saga and should reflect on it in shame.

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Page 16

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v1

Littlejohn

richard.littlejohn@dailymail.co.uk

Page 17

AS wildfires continue to rage all over Britain, and a huge blaze destroys homes in the West Midlands, Ian Botham has skittled the stumps of the guilty men and women responsible for the deranged rewilding cult.

Botham, cricketing legend turned passionate countryside campaigner, blames eco zealots for the destruction of our green and pleasant, aided and abetted by gormless politicians and civil servants.

Lord Beefy wrote in The Daily Telegraph: 'What makes me angry, very angry, is that lives need not be at risk. For our wildfire crisis is man-made. It is the result of dreadful policy mistakes repeated year after year.'

For two decades we have added far too much vegetation to our landscape and we are now suffering the consequences.

'Another genius move has been to stop preventative burning of heather. The winter burns used to create firebreaks. Now we have huge expanses of continuous, ageing vegetation.

The result is disaster after disaster. The massive fires at Raddleworth in 2018 and Fylingdales in 2025 started on land where winter burns had been blocked. At Raddleworth, five million people inhaled poisonous smoke. By some estimates, 28 died prematurely.'

His remarks reinforced the findings of another brilliant Saturday Essay by the Daily Mail's Robert Hardman.

Most of the fires which have engulfed the landscape could have been, if not avoided then certainly contained had traditional controlled burns not been abandoned.

A 'nature knows best' policy has prevented the removal from fields of dead debris, ie: tinder, and encouraged the unrestrained spread of vegetation which only adds fuel to the flames.

Now they're stepping up their attack on the grouse moors, which have been meticulously managed by gamekeepers, who have always been the first to spot fire outbreaks and extinguish them.

THE justification is that commercial shooting damages the moors and endangers other wildlife as well as the grouse being shot. The truth is that this is largely politically motivated by hatred of rich folk killing defenceless birds.

Nor is this eco-idiocy confined to stoking wildfires. These days if much of Britain isn't going up in flames, it's under water because of flooding caused by exactly the same kind of brain-dead civil servants and quangocrats responsible for rewilding.

Defra and the Environment Agency give every impression of being dysfunctional bureaucracies staffed exclusively by urban, green zealots in Birkens stock sandals, who have little or no 'lived experience' of managing farmland and waterways and always put political bigotry and protected species before people.

The Biblical floods which regularly make life a misery for tens of thousands are the direct result of policies implemented to create more wetlands for wildlife at the expense of farmers and homeowners.

This madness has been going on for years and has been well documented here.

For instance, widespread flooding in the Thames Valley was caused by the Environment Agency abandoning dredging of the river to protect an endangered mollusc called the Depressed River Mussel - an old favourite of this column, especially Gary. And to hell with the impact on riverside home owners.

In the Somerset Levels, they pursued a deliberate policy of increasing flooding by halting dredging to promote water voles, greater water parsnips, silver

How eco zealots are to blame for

BURNBABY

HERMAN

BRITAIN...

diving beetles and marsh grasshoppers. There are plenty of other examples.

Money which could have been spent on proper flood defences and reliable power sources has been fritted away on vanity projects such as bird sanctuaries and wind farms. If they cared that

THANKS for all your horror stories about being forced to use the kind of squat toilets which have been installed in Cambridge - even though they're not suitable for a family newspaper. Reader Colin Winsor picked up on my observation that you'd need the skills of a bomb-aimer on a WWII Lancaster. Colin's not so sure. 'Weren't they the planes that dropped the bouncing bombs?'

much about the environment they wouldn't be scarring the landscape with hideous War of the Worlds windmills, mile upon mile of monstrous pylons and carpeting valuable farmland with Chinese-made solar panels which are utterly useless when the sun don't shine. The reality is that the

THE Government's plans to billet thousands of small-boat migrants in former army bases has met with widespread resistance. Quite right, too. In any sane society, these camps would still be full of soldiers.

biggest threat to the environment - and the wider economy - is posed by the environmentalists themselves. And not just in rural areas, but our townscapes too.

This rewilding lunacy - which has seen plans to reintroduce wolves to Britain - has spread beyond the countryside. Urban

AFTER being sacked from the Cabinet, former Deputy PM David Lammy now hints he may run for Mayor of London. Given his inept Mastermind performance, if you asked him who succeeded Ken Livingstone as mayor, he'd probably answer: Dick Whittington.

rewilding is now the latest obsession of Green and loony Left councils.

Last week I brought you news that views of Bournemouth sea-front are obscured after rewilding fanatics got rid of their mowers and replaced them with goats, which can't reach the foliage creeping over the promenade. In Brighton, greenery is allowed to run wild, blocking pavements and turning a once-elegant Edwardian resort into Jungleland.

Nine out of ten councils in the UK have stopped regular mowing of grass verges and parkland in the name of encouraging 'biodiversity'. That's their story, anyway, and they're sticking to it.

Far more likely is that they've added not mowing the grass to the list of other things they're paid for but can't be bothered to do - such as emptying the dust-bins every week, levelling the pavements, filling in potholes, you name it - simply to save money and shed staff.

Failure to mow the verges is not only ugly but can be downright dangerous. A couple of days ago I was pulling out of a slip road at our local shopping parade in North London, attempting to cross a main road to turn right. The bushes had grown so high, I couldn't see any oncoming traffic - and I drive a tall-ish SUV.

WALK through any of Britain's once beautifully tended 27,000 city parks - part of our glorious municipal inheritance - and you'll find many of them overgrown with brambles, weeds and other out-of-control vegetation.

It can only be a matter of time before this madcap policy extends to those remaining recreation grounds and sports fields which haven't been sold off to developers for housing.

How long before they get round to cricket pitches? If Beefy Botham was bowling from the Pavilion End at Lord's these days, he'd have to fight his way through thickets of weeds and long grass, taking extra care not to run into one of the goats hired to maintain the outfield.

And what is Andy Pandy doing to fight the current wildfire crisis? After this week's Cobra meeting, he announced a clampdown on the sale of disposable barbecues, which responsible supermarkets have already withdrawn from the shelves.

We don't need the Prime Minister to tell us that these aluminium BBQs are fire hazards. In our local country parks there are large signs at every entrance forbidding portable barbecues and warning the rules will be strictly enforced.

He also promised more money for the fire brigades battling blazes round the clock. But that's just treating the symptoms, not the root cause.

Unless he reins in the rewilding fanatics, listens to the gamekeepers, farmers and countryfolk who have been tending the land for centuries, and insists on proper firebreaks taking precedence over letting nature run wild, then there'll only be one outcome:

Burn, Baby, Burnham.

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Page 18

Bound for Bond? Lowden

Why Jack's just the man for the 007 job

AUDITIONS are currently being held for the next James Bond - and a new name has slipped into the frame. Step forward Jack Lowden, known for playing River Cartwright in the hit TV show, Slow Horses.

Later this year, the 36-year-old will appear as Mr Darcy in Netflix's new adaptation of Pride And Prejudice (a frock-coated rite of passage for any acting hunk). Could it be he? Lowden is the most intriguing possibility to be named so far. He's certainly young

enough and handsome enough to play 007. He's Scottish - another bonus - and a man not a boy, someone with grit in his oyster. And he is streets ahead of the competition.

Other names in the frame include Callum Turner (eyes too close together), Aaron Taylor-Johnson (too pretty) Louis Partridge (too young), Tom Francis (too boyband) and Jacob Elordi (please God, just no). Fingers crossed the Bond people do the right thing. And pick the right man.

Are you thinking what she's thinking?

jan.moir@dailymail.co.uk

TINDERBOX Britain! Only travel if your journey is essential! Shops must stop selling portable barbecues! You can still buy fireworks, though! We will introduce additional funding for firefighters! Nine new reservoirs will be built! And also we plan to 'help farmers with their

irrigation'. Why do Labour's haphazard, chaotic plans to beat the heatwave fill me with doom and gloom?

Mostly because they sound less like a capable government in charge of a national crisis. And tragically more like Dad's Army on manoeuvres.

Inappropriate? Kiedis has form...

VOGUE WILLIAMS has criticised 63-year-old Red Hot Chili Peppers frontman Anthony Kiedis for dating a 19-year-old (when he was in his 50s). Nothing illegal there, but as Vogue says, just because you can, does it mean that you should?

Kiedis has form in the inappropriate relationship department. In fact, some might say the heavily tattooed rocker has been getting away with it for years. In his 2004 autobiography, Scar Tissue, Kiedis admitted to having a sexual relationship with a 14-year-old girl when he was 23 years old.

This union was also proudly chronicled in the band's hit song, Catholic School Girls

Age gap: With partner Eileen Kelly, 30 years Kiedis' junior

Rule. No shame there! Following this, Kiedis was 24 when he embarked on a two-year-relationship with Ione Skye, the daughter of pop singer Donovan.

Now an actress, Ione was only 16 at the time, a minor in the state of California where they

lived. So what? An unabashed Kiedis included a nude picture of the couple in Scar Tissue. Tru luv! In 1990, he was convicted of sexual battery and indecent exposure after one of the band's gigs and fined $1,000 on each charge.

None of this put off Melanie Chisholm, who was a young-looking 25 and still called Sporty Spice when she dated Kiedis in 1999.

I'm the last person on earth who'd ever defend the behaviour of the former Prince Andrew. But isn't it strange that he has been demonised as a paedophile while Anthony Kiedis has escaped even a whisper of censure?

Mossy the woo-woo wellness guru - no one was buying it!

AHOY there, Kate Moss! This week, the former supermodel was relaxing on a yacht in the Mediterranean, blissfully unperturbed about the failure of her wellness brand, which shuttered amid £2.9million of debt.

Cosmoss was a lockdown project, like all the worst ideas. Customers were supposed to covet her Sacred Mist perfume (top notes of tonka bean, with botanical extracts 'to ground the body and uplift the

mind' - £70 for a piddling 100ml bottle), a £50 face cream that promised 'a conscious approach to skincare', and a £20 packet of cedarwood-scented joss sticks to 'reset your mood'.

It would take more than this woo-woo rubbish to reset anyone's opinion about the former hedonist and hellraiser turned late-life healer.

No one was buying it, Kate. In more ways than one.

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Page 19

Jan MOIR

If even Trump's right-hand woman can't cope as a working mother, what chance for ordinary mums?

MAGA darling Karoline Leavitt is leaving the White House. What is that all about? First rat off the sinking ship, primary pecan to flee the nuthouse - or is she just another young woman who has belatedly felt the juggle isn't worth the struggle?

Karoline's beloved President Trump revealed her unexpected departure on social media in approving terms, saying that his press secretary - who he's previously described as 'smart, tough' and 'highly effective' - was leaving 'so she can spend more time with her family'.

The 28-year-old White House spokesperson gave birth to a daughter, Viviana, in May, and has a son Niko, born in July 2024.

In the beginning, like many women, Karoline thought she could hope. Then, when the emotional and practical reality of motherhood hit home, her change of heart was clearly charted in her public pronouncements.

Last year Leavitt said: 'I think every working mother understands the demands. And no matter where you are, what you're doing, there is a sense of guilt.'

This week on social media she remarked that since the birth of her second child, she realised she couldn't be the mother her children deserved while devoting the 'constant time, energy and attention', that her job requires.

So she will leave her prestigious, high-profile position at the end of this month, perhaps to happily dissolve in a high tide of Napisan and num-nums, never to be seen again. Somehow, I doubt it.

Leavitt is incorrigible, unflusable, a woman who one day might be capable of high MAGA political office herself. Trump has already

said she'll be kept on in an advisory capacity, for he is reluctant to lose this formidable operator.

I should say at this point that while I think Leavitt was professionally outstanding in her role, her sneering treatment of journalists who challenged Trump and his administration was despicable, unforgivable. Not least because America is supposed to be a glittering, First World democracy, not a banana republic.

White House correspondents are there on behalf of their readers, listeners, viewers and the electorate in general. It is their job to ask difficult questions, to throw metaphorical bottles from the back, to challenge the orthodoxy and the ruling political elite.

For this, the awkward squad were dismissed by Leavitt as crooked, as 'Left-wing hacks' and 'biased' activists rather than honest profes-

sionals deserving of her respect. If she ends her career sobbing about what might have been elbow deep in a nappy boil-wash, I for one will not mourn the absence of her corrosive presence.

But the real point is if Karoline Leavitt cannot cope as a working mother, what chance do ordinary mums have? Leavitt is an ultra-woman, a luxe-living, 600-thread count, five-ply high-flyer for whom ordinary rules do not apply.

She could afford an army of nannies, for a start. If she had wanted to build a gold-plated creche in the middle of the White House ballroom for her ickle kiddies, Donald Trump would have personally approved the plans, provided he could come down every day to join in biccy time and playing Pin The Tail on JD Vance.

AND it's not just that the soon-to-be-former press secretary is presumed to earn a personal annual income of over £1 million. Nor is it that she is married to Nicholas Riccio, a wealthy real estate developer, who just happens to be 32 years her senior.

'It is atypical,' she says of their relationship, 'but it works.' Their congress also vividly depicts the shortfall in the feminist career experience, for the reality is that it is men - and only men - who can truly have it all.

Look at Mr Riccio, who never had to give up his lucrative business, nor take a career break, nor fret if nanny wasn't buttering Junior's toast correctly. Nor did

As they were: Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston in 2000

All I want is Brad and Jen back together

AFTER seven years sober, Brad Pitt is back on the booze. 'I can have a few [glasses of wine],' he told Esquire. 'But I can't have a lot. I have to be professional about it.' The recovery community are horrified - he's only kidding himself, they say. Somehow I think Brad will be OK. Not least as he's meeting up with ex-wife

Jennifer Aniston again, for cosy, old pals' dates. This is everything. All I want in life is for Brad and Jen to get back together. This would be a greater reunion than that little business this week when the sun and the moon met in a once-in-a-lifetime eclipse. Let's raise a glass to the happy ever after of my dreams.

he have to worry that the shutters were slamming down on his window of fertility, because for him becoming a parent at the grand old age of 58 and 60 wasn't a problem.

Compare this with the news that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has announced that she is freezing her eggs, future-proofing for a family to arrive at a more convenient time in her career arc. A time, may I suggest, that might never arrive.

The New York Democrat is 36 years old and, although on the opposite end of the political spectrum from Leavitt, she's also struggling to navigate the conflicting demands of professional aspiration and building a family.

Some have dismissed her egg strategy as selfish, but surely the whole process of choosing parent-

hood, whatever your circumstances, is selfish in one way or another? Women like Leavitt and Ocasio-Cortez are damned if they do and damned if they don't - and their mutual experiences reflect the dilemma of young, working women everywhere.

Still, I find it heartening that these smart, younger women no longer buy into the exhausting myth that they can have it all - meaning a flourishing career, an idyllic family life, plus professional and maternal personal fulfilment.

Forget it, sister. It is just not going to happen. That is why Karoline has kwit. And why Alexandria is egg-bound. From their very different perspectives they have seen the high personal cost suffered by the women who went before them; women often hollowed out by equal parts corporate job envy and maternal guilt.

They have worked out for themselves that the end result just might not be worth the game. And so they have taken steps to improve their circumstances and wrangle motherhood into a shape that suits them. You might not agree with their methods, but you cannot blame them for trying.

'If she'd wanted a gold-plated creche in the White House, Trump would have come down to join in biccy time and play Pin The Tail on JD Vance'

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Take cover: Katy Perry's odd crochet wrap and (right) Eva Longoria checks all the boxes in a matching shirt

Sheer nerve: Liz Hurley's glam cover-up and (right) Tess Daly in her matching set

by Shane Watson

EVERY summer is good for celebrity swimwear watching, but this has been a bumper year for observing the A-list on the beach... and on the yacht, at the bar, poolside.

We've had the Beckhams on board Seven for weeks on end, we've had Jennifer Aniston's posse (including Courteney Cox) on their yacht off Mallorca, we've glimpsed the Sussexes on the beach in Portugal, Amanda Holden - fast taking over from Liz Hurley as the most prolific poster of swimwear shots - everywhere, and the cavalcade shows no sign of letting up.

Here's what we've learned, so far, about midlife beach dressing from the most experienced holidaymakers on the planet...

STICK TO THE ONE-PIECE RULES

IN celebrity world, the one-piece - if it's glamorous and well cut - occasionally bumps the two-piece off first position. But competition is stiff out there, so it has to be just right and make the wearer look better than they do in a bikini (see Bella Hadid in her Prada swimsuit).

DON'T: Keep wearing the Past-Its-Best-One-piece. Kate Moss, 52, is currently holidaying off the coast of Formentera near Ibiza and has been pictured diving off a yacht in a plunge-front halterneck black swimsuit - one of at least three that she keeps in rotation. Sadly this one needs retiring soon.

We've all experienced this hazard of the favourite one-piece: getting stuck in the used-to-be-great, now past-its-best swimsuit that no longer does the contouring and containing job it once did perfectly. It happens to the best of them, eventually, especially if you don't rinse them and dry them carefully (fairly sure Kate is not big on swimwear maintenance); they end up losing their shape and stretch and become gappy on the legs, clingy on the stomach and generally saggy. All the worst enemies.

DO: As Goldie Hawn, 80, has been doing this summer and wear your favourite black one-piece with a

How to steal the stars' tricks and DAZZLE on the BEACH

...and which celebrities lay bare what NOT to wear

saron knotted around the hips. It's the baggy legs that are the very worst and this solves that in an instant, plus covering any tummy bulge.

MAX YOUR COVER-UP

WE live in sun-damage-aware times and however good you want to look, there are times when you need that extra bit of cover.

This is what rash vests are made for, or beach cover-ups, or a light,

long-sleeved shirt. If you improvise you tend to look like someone at the Ryanair check-in who has been forced to wear some of the contents of their suitcase to reduce the weight of their luggage.

THE RASH VEST ALTERNATIVE

DON'T: Do as Katy Perry, 41, did at Les Palmiers beach club in Saint-

Tropez, when she wore what looked like an oversize crochet scarf to protect her chest and shoulders from the sun (particularly necessary if you're wearing a strapless swimsuit).

Example B is Jennifer Aniston, 57, who opted to wear her long-sleeved grey rash vest draped over her front, arms hanging down the back - perfectly practical, we've all done it when we feel our chest starting to burn - but certainly

not glamorous. A fine cotton white shirt to match her soft white cotton shorts would have been much prettier.

DO: Wear a long-sleeved shirt and shorts (aka 'co-ords'). Better still, do as Eva Longoria, 51, did in what is the top fashion cover-up of 2026 - wear a check bikini under a matching long, check shirt and shorts. The new fab four-piece.

THE GLAMOUR MAXI

DO: Channel Liz Hurley. She's 61 and still breaking all the rules of grown-up bikini wearing - this month she's been pictured wearing a mint halterneck bikini with chain-link bikini bottom sides (even less wearable than string bow-tied).

Needless to say she looks as amazing as ever but, note, these days you will find her mostly wearing a light and breezy cover up over her bikinis.

The one she's wearing here is a classic Hurley cover-up: open, split to the thigh, sheerish and floaty, so it doesn't appear to be covering up much at all, but crucially it's long (short offers no protection) and loose and provides just enough camouflage where you need it.

The issue - as everyone who has worn a bikini over 50 knows - is not so much how you look straight-on, as what occurs when you move about. The drape of an open, sheerish cover-up blurs your silhouette and gives as much protection as you want it to.

DON'T: Get carried away and wear your floaty beach cover-up over a matching swimsuit in the manner of Tess Daly, 57. And don't pop it on over tailored shorts. The rule is swimwear underneath only. Ideally skip the heels too.

THE MATCHING SARONG

ANOTHER glamorous alternative is the sarong/long wrap skirt that's made to match your bikini, but this is a three-piece that has to be handled with caution. It can look dowdy, especially in black, and because the fabric is stretchy it isn't always flattering.

DON'T: Opt for a too small cover-up. Katy Perry, back in July, in the South of France again, wore a chocolate-brown, halterneck bikini with matching sarong - but the trouble with this is it didn't

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Page 21

A good bikini is all in the balance: Jennifer Aniston and (right) actress Eva Longoria

Costume drama: Kate Moss and (below) Bella Hadid in their one-pieces

sit right and it was pulled too tight, so one leg was permanently on show. With a sarong you want full coverage with room for movement or it's not enough protection (for lunch in Saint-Tropez's exclusive Le Club 55) and it doesn't create a flattering line below the waist.

DO: As Goldie Hawn does and wrap around a fabric sarong tied high on one hip.

AND DO WEAR BIKINIS

THE bikini versus one-piece debate continues (should you over 50? Can you ever over 60?) but the fact remains that there are celebrities with bodies that look just as good in bikinis as they did 20 years ago – maybe better.

There are however a couple of golden rules for bikini wearing post-50, even if you have a body that could make the cover of Sports Illustrated.

BOTTOM BALANCE

THE picture of Jennifer Aniston doing plank exercises on her yacht holiday made headlines because she's as fit as she was in the days of Friends, but had she known she would probably have opted for a neat pair of fitted bikini bottoms, not the soft, foldover sort.

DON'T: Opt for messy, unstructured bottoms. And if you are wearing a thong bottom, or any XS style, make sure your top is not two tiny triangles on a couple of strings (Eva Longoria got the memo).

DO: Wear a wide-brimmed hat. If you look at pictures of Longoria in her orange bikini her straw hat brim is more or less the width of her shoulders which balances out the micro bottoms, and at the same time makes her look more elegant and much less exposed. Magic.

THE DOUBLE BIKINI BOTTOM

WELL, it's really shorts worn over bikini bottoms, but the sort of relaxed short shorts you only wear as an extra layer over your bikini bottoms to feel a bit more covered when you're moving around – plus they're very flattering.

DO: Do as Amanda Holden, 55, did and match a floral bikini with sporty drawstring mini shorts in the same colour and keep a fraction of the bikini bottom on show. That's the look. The alternative is soft, almost sheer, cotton pull-on shorts, like Jennifer Aniston's.

DON'T: Wear smart tailored shorts over a one-piece – as Tess Daly has been pictured doing. Sorry Tess.

Double up: Amanda Holden tops her bikini with a pair of shorts

Pictures: BACKGREEL INSTAGRAM

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Page 23

102-year-old with dementia died after being 'pushed off the stage of a pub'

By Olivia Day

THE son of a 102-year-old man who died after he was allegedly pushed off a pub stage said he hopes for 'some justice'.

Great-grandfather Phillip Ormerod was reportedly shoved backwards when he asked a punk band to turn down the music.

Mr Ormerod, who suffered from dementia, was taken to hospital with critical injuries from the Crow's Nest in Cwmbran, South Wales, following the incident on August 1.

Gwent Police confirmed yesterday that the pensioner had passed away after spending

'People saw him as a character'

almost two weeks in intensive care at Grange University Hospital in nearby Llanfrechfa, Gwent.

His son Robert, a retired civil engineer, said his father used to visit the pub regularly and described him as a popular character who young people would buy beer for when at the bar.

He added: 'What happened is not nice. The pub has changed a lot over the years. It has become a youngster's pub. We just hope for some justice.'

Pub-goers said the 'lovely' but 'confused' centenarian wandered on to the stage when cover band SuperHans were playing. He was then allegedly pushed away, tumbling backwards on to the floor.

Police and Welsh Ambulance Service were called at 10.25pm. A 56-year-old man, from Lla-

Tragedy: The Crow's Nest in Cwmbran where Phillip Ormerod, right, drank a couple of times a week

Justice: Son Robert Ormerod

nelli, was arrested on suspicion of causing grievous bodily harm and remains under investigation but he is not in custody.

The group, which regularly performs at local venues and pubs across South Wales, has since

taken down its Facebook and Instagram pages.

Robert revealed that his father had been diagnosed with dementia three years ago.

He said: 'He could be difficult with having dementia. He walked to the pub two or three times a week. He was a beer drinker and I suppose some people saw him as a bit of a character at his age.'

The father-of-two told how he had grown up in the home where his father lived since 1960.

He said his dad had a career as a design draftsman and had lived alone since his wife died 40 years ago.

One pub-goer said: 'My understanding from the police and staff at the time was that the 102-year-old, who lived independently and was a regular at the pub, went on to the stage, which was up three steps, to ask for the music to be turned down.

He was pushed, causing him to fall down the three steps, and broke his hip.'

Another local said: 'It's believed he was pushed hard enough that he did not fall down the steps, but cleared them and landed on the floor below.'

DCI Shelley Comley, senior investigating officer, said: 'We understand the public interest in this incident but want to remind people that not only is this an active criminal investigation but there is a family at the heart of it processing the loss of a loved one.'

'Please consider the impact inaccurate or speculative comments - particularly online commentary - could have on them.'

Before the group's page was removed from social media, a statement read: 'For personal reasons, I (Josh) am stepping away from being the guitarist in SuperHans.'

RSPB blamed over tougher rules on game bird shooting

Daily Mail Reporter

LABOUR has been accused of tightening rules on game shooting after bowing to pressure from the Royal Society for Protection of Birds (RSPB).

In January, the charity's chief executive Beccy Speight reportedly wrote to then-environment secretary Emma Reynolds: 'I am writing to ask you to bring forward legislation to license game bird shooting. I am also asking you to meet with me to discuss this as a matter of urgency.'

Ministers introduced proposals to license gamebird shooting in a new 'land use framework' published two months after receiving the letter.

The British Association for

'Evidence should inform policy'

Shooting and Conservation's Marnie Lovejoy said: 'Sustainable shooting is worth an estimated £3.3billion a year to the economy and delivers the equivalent of £500million in conservation work each year - the kind of evidence that should sit at the heart of any policy affecting the countryside.

'A proposal that appears to have followed a lobbying letter, rather than that evidence, is not the right starting point.

Ms Speight said: 'We work transparently with governments of all political parties to help inform decisions affecting nature and wildlife.' The Government said it was taking an 'evidence-first approach'.

Bishop 'raped girl of 15 on a pilgrimage'

THE Bishop of Northampton has appeared in court over allegations he raped a teenage girl on a pilgrimage to France.

David Oakley, 70, is accused of twice having sex with the girl, who was 15 at the time, in the early 2000s.

Oakley was charged in June with two counts of rape of a girl under the age of 16 following an investigation by Staffordshire Police's rape and serious sexual offences team. He appeared at Westminster Magistrates' Court yesterday via videolink from his lawyer's office to face the charges.

Prosecutor Sarah Madden told the court that Oakley and the girl 'started dating... after going on a pilgrimage to Lourdes', adding: 'She recalls sex with the defendant on at least two occasions.'

Oakley was not asked to enter pleas to the charges and the case was sent to the Old Bailey.

Three minutes of sprinting could be better for you than a 90-minute run

SPRINTING for just three minutes can deliver more health benefits than 90 minutes of moderate exercise, research suggests.

Adults are currently advised to do at least 150 minutes of moderate-to-vigorous activity, such as running or cycling, each week.

But researchers now say a short, intense burst of exercise could be a better way to reduce the risk of a range of health issues - including heart disease and diabetes.

A study by a team at The Rock-

By Zoe Hardy

efeller University, New York - published in the journal Cell Reports Medicine - compared different intensities of exercise and found six 30-second all-out sprints triggered rapid changes in 714 blood proteins linked to health and disease.

The experts believe that's because intense exercise puts extreme demands on muscles, including the heart, forcing them

to communicate rapidly with the rest of the body. In response, cells in the body release a wave of signalling molecules into the bloodstream that help regulate energy consumption and tissue repair.

In comparison moderate cycling altered just seven proteins.

Dr Paul Cohen, lead author, said: 'Just a few minutes of intense exercise can trigger a significant molecular response.

'And we still see it after eight weeks of training.'

'There's a shady spot there!'

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Page 24

Timothee keeps us guessing on Wonka 2

WONKA will have to wait. Timothee Chalamet is delaying the start of filming on Wonka 2 - which had been pencilled in for the UK this November - while he decides what to do next. Writer Simon Farnaby told Variety: 'He wants to do one, but he's not sure about timing or what he wants to do next.' He added that the film was 'delayed

indefinitely'. Warner Bros took issue with this, saying that to speak of a delay was 'entirely false'.

A chastened Farnaby clarified: 'I 100 per cent did not say Wonka 2 wasn't happening. Everyone is working really hard on it. It's just about working out schedules.'

Alison

Follow me on X @alisonboshoff

It ends with us...or does it. Ryan 'stokes' Baldoni feud

RYAN Reynolds has been accused of secretly 'stoking harassment' on social media by Justin Baldoni's former publicist this week - even though the It Ends With Us legal battle is technically over.

Three months after the epic - and epically expensive - dispute between Reynolds' wife Blake Lively and her former co-star Baldoni finally staggered to a conclusion, Reynolds has returned to the fray and apparently liked a number of posts by two pro-Blake influencers, including one this week called Justin Baldoni's Problematic Behavior.

Although Reynolds later 'unliked' the post, it appears he has liked a number of others by the 'anti misogyny educator' and 'men's advocate' Brent MacLerie, whose account, ExPatriarch, Reynolds follows.

Reynolds also follows legal commentator MorewithMJ (American lawyer Mary-Jane Morley) who, like MacLerie, advances a heavily anti-Baldoni narrative.

It's surprising to see an A-lister of Reynolds' stature stooping to engage with the 'legal commentary' crowd. Even more so, given that one of his wife's key complaints was that she herself had been the victim of a 'retaliatory smear campaign' - which she said she was proud to have stood up against.

However it was revealed during the legal action that Reynolds was deeply invested in the fallout from the affair, sending long angry emails to the team at his agency.

In these, he described Baldoni as a 'predator', 'fraud', 'sociopath', 's***ball', 'human rounding error' and 'bucket of dumb dumb juice'.

He demanded that his agents secure a public apology and wrote that executives at Sony were '***ing textbook, ineffectual elderly people'.

Melissa Nathan, who was hired briefly by Baldoni after reports about a breakdown in relations between him and his leading lady, tells me that every post by the pro-Blake-fluencers results in an 'immediate spike in harassment' of her and her team at TAG PR.

She said: 'I have been attacked non-stop by these legal commentators, they literally incite people to come after me and they make up and misrepresent legal situations, day in and day out.'

'It feels as if I have been bullied

'Likes': Lively and Reynolds

every day for two years. People actually take the word of these 'advocates' as if it is true - and Ryan Reynolds is liking the posts.'

Sources close to the Deadpool star counter: 'It's important to note how many pro-Lively creators are attacked and harassed. All the pro-Baldoni accounts attack and harass Blake daily.'

These influencers, few of whom have any legal background, pump out content based on one or the other viewpoint - and make a good living from whipping up hatred. The phenomenon took off during Johnny Depp's skirmish with ex-wife Amber Heard in 2022.

THIS April, a court dismissed ten of Lively's 13 claims, including her sexual harassment allegations against Baldoni. The judge ruled she could not pursue the harassment claims under federal law because she worked on the film as an independent contractor, not an employee. Her remaining claims were allowed to proceed to trial.

The following month those claims, which revolved around 'retaliation', were settled out of court. A court filing later confirmed the settlement involved no financial payout.

It Ends With Us, which Baldoni also directed, was released in cinemas in August 2024, amid reports of tensions between Baldoni and Lively on the Press tour.

Amid the competing lawsuits, Baldoni was labelled a 'doofus director' and a 'clown' by his leading lady, who insisted on making changes to the script - and then asked to produce her own cut of the film ... which was used instead of his.

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Page 25

Boshoff

No sex, please: Why Gen Z are the new prudes

WHAT if we made a sex comedy – and took all the sex out?

That seems to be what has happened with the critically panned film One Night Only, starring Monica Barbaro and Callum Turner, which comes out in the UK at the end of the month.

It's set in a dystopian future where premarital sex is banned except for one night a year – the night when Allie (Barbaro, left) and Owen (Turner) happen to meet.

There is no observable chemistry between the pair (pictured inset); and people who've seen the muddled romcom are whispering that it's so bad it might harm Turner's chances of playing the ultimate sex symbol,

James Bond. He's one of the favourites for that role at the moment. One Night Only's director Will Gluck explained that he ended up with a no-sex sex comedy because young

people – a prime target audience for this one – don't like to see sex on screen at all.

He said earlier versions of the film showed lots of people taking advantage of the 'one night'... but test screenings showed that audiences didn't want to see it.

He said that he 'just kept editing it out', and added: 'I believe it's been a societal shift, from taking nudity in adult situations and putting them on your phones at home for everybody.

'Now it's more of a private, intimate thing that people don't want to see when they're in a shared experience. Once I learned that, I applied it to this movie. I cut out so much.'

WHAT is going on with Samantha Morton and her daughter Esme Creed-Miles?

The pair, both pictured, never like each other's social media posts, and Esme – an actress and singer – hasn't said a word about her mother's role in The Odyssey (she plays the goddess and sorceress Circe). Or liked any of Morton's Instagram posts from that film's Press tour.

She didn't even 'like' her mother's post when she was given a Bafta fellowship in 2024.

■ HOMER is having a moment – and not Homer Simpson. The success of Christopher Nolan's The Odyssey has propelled a translation of the

ancient Greek poet's epic story to the top of the paperback non-fiction charts, and it is sitting in second place in hardback non-fiction, too.

'Oh, do stop mumbling!' Wossy tells Woodall...

JONATHAN Ross has an issue with Leo Woodall.

Ross, who has a film podcast called Reel Talk, said: 'I noticed a tendency, since One Day onwards – he is increasingly mumbling his lines and swallowing his dialogue.

'He's a sexy mumbler. He's a very handsome young man. But I struggle to understand what he's saying sometimes.

'He was in that Apple series – it was not very good – about some kind of secret code in mathematics [Prime Target, pictured].

And I was like, 'Open your mouth, boy!' I like him. I just wish he'd have some diction lessons.'

THEY say no good deed goes unpunished. Just ask Bafta. The US branch of the British Academy of Film and Television Arts – Bafta North America – has had to postpone plans to award three 'Bafta Honors' in Hollywood ... for a second time. The academy announced last summer that it wanted to hold a ceremony in Los Angeles in the winter of 2025, at which it would recognise outstanding achievements in film, TV and gaming by handing over three of its iconic golden masks. A few months later, the charity

Bafta awards? You can't give 'em away these days

announced that the event would be put back to winter 2026. And now it's looking like autumn 2027. A Bafta source said the latest delay was because the venue they wanted was not available.

■ IN other news Stateside, they have packed up the tent and put away the bunting on The Great

American Baking Show – the US Version of The Great British Bake Off. The show, which saw Paul Hollywood and Prue Leith act as judges with two US presenters, has been cancelled by Roku after four series. Prue announced in January this year that she was leaving GBBO, aged 86, and has been replaced in the forthcoming Channel 4 series by Nigella Lawson.

Rocket Man Taron to play speed king

TARON Egerton is being lined up to play doomed speed record-breaker Donald Campbell in a movie biopic. The Welsh actor, who portrayed Elton John in Rocket Man, is set to take on the part of the daredevil Brit, who entered the history books behind the wheel of the iconic Bluebird vehicles. He died in 1967 trying to break the 300mph barrier at Coniston Water in the Lake District, aged 45. Taron, 36, is seen as the best choice to

lead the film, which is in the early stages of development by movie executives at Fremantle.

Father-of-one Donald, who had three wives, broke eight absolute world speed records in the 1950s and 1960s. He remains the only person to set world records on land and water in the same year (1964).

In 1967 he was killed when the jet-powered hydroplane he was piloting – the Bluebird K7 – flipped while travelling at

nearly 300mph. Campbell's teddy bear mascot Mr Whippit was found floating among the wreckage, as was his pilot's helmet; but his body, and the bulk of the Bluebird, was not recovered until 2001.

The as yet untitled movie looks at his complicated family life and his obsession with following in the footsteps of his father, Sir Malcolm Campbell. Sir Malcolm died with death attempting the same records between the wars and died in 1948 of natural causes, aged 63.

Doomed: Campbell

Picture: WARNER BROS/IN/STEWARTON/VSC IMAGES/SHUTTERDOCK-APPLITN-PROPER/070 1M-GEITY

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Page 26

dailymail.com/crimedesk

A desperate mother said to be suffering from postnatal psychosis. A father in the crosshairs of online sleuths. As 'America's saddest murder trial' grips the world...

by Barbara McMahon

Who's really to blame for the deaths of these three angelic children?

WITH its scenic beaches, good schools and family-friendly environment, the coastal town of Duxbury, Massachusetts, was the ideal place for Patrick and Lindsay Clancy to raise their three young children.

The Microsoft executive, 38, and his wife, a former cheerleader and maternity nurse, were popular members of the small and affluent community 35 miles south of Boston and regarded as loving and devoted parents to Cora, five, Dawson, three, and eight-month-old Callan.

To neighbours they seemed like a typical young couple juggling busy schedules and a growing family. Yet on a chilly winter's day three years ago, the lives of these outwardly normal, middle-class parents were consumed by tragedy.

Sending her husband to pick up medication from a local pharmacy and a takeaway dinner, Lindsay did something seemingly unfathomable. In a methodical act of violence that would have lasted several minutes, she strangled her three children in the basement of the house, then went back upstairs and attempted to kill herself by slashing her wrists and neck, swallowing crushed pills and jumping from a second-floor window.

Returning to the family's colonial-style clapboard house after less than an hour, Patrick Clancy found two unimaginable scenes - his wife lying severely injured on the ground in their garden and his three tiny children unconscious with rubber exercise bands around their necks.

The children were rushed to hospital, where Cora and Dawson were declared dead. Medics resuscitated infant Callan after a cardiac arrest but, after three days on life support, he was deemed brain dead and passed away too.

LAST month Lindsay Clancy's trial for murder began at Plymouth Superior Court in Massachusetts, and quickly gripped both US and global audiences. Televised five each day, with its gut-wrenching evidence from first responders, a first-hand account from the bereaved father of the events leading up to the deaths and periodic outbreaks of uncontrollable sobbing from Lindsay, it's been dubbed 'America's saddest murder trial'.

Now podcasts, true crime forums and social media platforms are buzzing with comments from dedicated armchair sleuths, all attempting to answer the fraught and increasingly divisive question at the trial's heart.

Why did she do it?

What's more, in some parts of the online crime commentariat, people are asking a further, still wilder question. Did she do it?

The case centres on Lindsay's mental health after giving birth to Callan and, by extension, the care given to mothers suffering postpartum conditions in general.

Lindsay had been struggling for months with serious issues after the birth of Callan - and Patrick

Courtroom ordeal: Patrick Clancy and, right, his now paralysed former wife Lindsay

was struggling to support her. The couple repeatedly sought help for her worsening mental state after she reported having symptoms that included severe insomnia, heart-racing anxiety and thoughts about killing herself.

She told another mother that she 'felt like a zombie' and wrote in a notebook that she felt 'completely overwhelmed' looking after three small children and as though she was 'drowning'.

The Clancy's consulted doctors

and other experts, and Lindsay, who turned 36 this week, was prescribed at least a dozen medications in the space of just a few months, including antidepressants, antipsychotics, sleep aids and anti-anxiety drugs.

With no improvement in her health, on New Year's Eve 2022, she voluntarily checked herself into the McLean psychiatric hospital, one of the state's top-ranked mental health facilities. However, staff deemed her a 'low

risk' patient and she was discharged after five days.

Nineteen days later, on the evening of January 24, 2023, she killed her children.

In the wood-paneled US courtroom in Massachusetts, the prosecution led by Assistant District Attorney Jennifer Sprague claims Lindsay connived to get her husband out of the house and deliberately carefully and cold-bloodedly planned the murders.

Lindsay's defence lawyer Kevin

Reddington, who is fast becoming an internet sensation for his calm, forensic questioning style and obvious compassion for Lindsay, says his client does not dispute her role in their deaths. Instead, he argues that she was let down by a negligent medical community who over-medicated her and failed to properly diagnose her.

He claims she is not criminally responsible for the triple killings because she was suffering a postnatal crisis of mental health that warped her sense of reality. Doctors who diagnosed her with postpartum depression, he argues, failed to identify accurately the much rarer and more acute condition of postpartum psychosis (PPP), a severe illness linked to stress, sleep deprivation and hormonal changes after childbirth.

Affecting about one in 1,000 mothers, PPP symptoms include high or low moods, hallucinations, delusions and extreme confusion.

At one point in his evidence, Patrick described his wife's whispered words after killing the children: 'She said she heard a man's voice telling her if she didn't do it now, she would lose her chance.'

As a result of the fall from the window that night, Lindsay is now paralysed from the waist down and in a wheelchair. As she sits at the defence table, occasionally clutching Reddington's hand, she cuts a frail, guilt-ridden figure and has often been difficult to watch.

On one particularly emotional day in court, she hid behind her long dark hair and her body shook with sobs as autopsy photos of baby Callan were shown to jurors.

On another traumatic day, when Patrick's piercing screams were heard on a 911 call after he discovered their children's bodies, she

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Page 27

PHOTO: DAVID BLAKES/DAVID BLAKES/DAVID BLAKES

Tortment behind the smiles: Patrick and Lindsay Clancy with the children she would later admit to killing, Cora, Dawson and Callan

repeatedly broke down. It was the first time she had heard the emergency call.

Moments earlier, Patrick described coming home from his errands and calling out to his family. When no one answered, he searched the children's rooms and the bathroom, before finding blood throughout the main bedroom and a window open.

Now the armchair detectives are lining up to weigh in with their opinions. Much of it has been sensible and considered analysis of the evidence, with many online commentators – mostly women – rooting for Lindsay.

SOME have talked about their own experiences with post-birth depression, saying that, even if they didn't hurt their babies, they have sympathy for what the young mother was going through and that men cannot fully understand the complexity of postnatal medical conditions.

But in an unexpected and disturbing development, there is scant compassion for Patrick, with some claiming that he has questions to answer too. Did he support his wife enough? Should he not have stepped up to look after the children more when she

was so clearly at crisis point? Even more sinister are outright accusations from a small but growing number of conspiracy theorists – with no evidence to back up their claims – that Patrick is the true guilty party and that he framed his wife, gaslighted her and made her believe she killed the children. 'My gut reaction is that he did it,' declares one commentator, while another writes righteously: 'I definitely believe that the husband did it... someone should tell the judge.'

'The nature of social media is that it breeds conspiracy theories and everybody gets to be a dime store detective in a case like this,' former prosecutor and criminal defence attorney Jack Rice told the Daily Mail. 'We're seeing more and more people making things up in their heads. Evidence becomes superfluous and it's just people's opinions that count these days. We're already seeing in politics that if you say something with confidence it must be true and now it's bleeding into the criminal justice system.'

While Judge William Sullivan reminded jurors at the start of the trial that they cannot decide the case based on emotion, no such restriction applies to the millions watching this family tragedy from the sidelines and some are clearly taking full advantage of it. Online

antipathy towards Patrick is one of the hottest topics of discussion about the Clancy case, despite law enforcement officials and prosecutors repeatedly stating that he had no involvement in the heartbreaking event and has been cleared of any wrongdoing.

Keyboard warriors have pointed to the bereaved father's demeanour as being 'cold' in the witness box, when it appeared to those in the courtroom that the businessman was desperately trying to maintain his equilibrium while being forced to relive every parent's worst nightmare.

Critics have also pointed out that he was 'quick' to marry again after divorcing Lindsay, with some amateur sleuths suggesting he was having an affair before the murders. Patrick married fertility doctor Rachel Danis in New York in April this year, three years after the tragedy.

Most popular in online discussion groups are examinations of 'inconsistencies' in evidence put before the jury so far. A theory that Patrick changed his shoes went viral with claims that he wore boots when he went to pick up medication for his daughter at the pharmacy then changed into sneakers minutes later to pick up takeaway food, as seen on CCTV footage. The apparent difference, however, is more likely to be due

to lighting in the different stores. Others claim a 'suspicious' email sent that evening raises further questions. Having left the house at about 5.15pm, Patrick arrived at the pharmacy at about 5.32pm, yet an email to his staff was time-stamped 5.24pm.

Social media users have asked how he could send a work email when he was supposed to be running errands. Questioned by his wife's attorney, Patrick said he wasn't sure whether the email was sent from his laptop or his mobile phone, adding to the confusion. If from the laptop, amateur detectives say he must have been at the house rather than the shops, which does not fit the police timeline. No evidence has been presented in court to suggest this theory.

Other 'anomalies' include the weight of a bed allegedly moved by Lindsay so she could leap from the second-floor window. Online conspiracy theorists claim she could not have moved the heavy piece of furniture alone and that Patrick staged the scene having pushed her out of the window.

Perhaps the biggest of the online oddball theories is that Patrick committed the crimes himself and framed his wife because he wanted to make a new life without his family. Some people have gone further and suggested that Patrick himself was the male voice in

his wife's head telling her to kill herself and her children.

A recent poll on TikTok of 63,000 people said 91 per cent of respondents think Patrick is guilty.

'People want a villain,' says Rice, one of America's most respected legal commentators. 'Who can't look at three dead children and think somebody must pay?'

'They're shifting the blame on to him [Patrick] because people think she [Lindsay] wasn't in her right mind or people have a hard time believing a mother could kill her children. I think how calm he was on the witness stand made people decide it was inappropriate for someone who was the innocent parent and that there must be something nefarious going on. That was the starting shot and then people began looking for any other inconsistency.'

With conspiracy theories of Patrick's guilt spreading, even the Pulitzer Prize-winning newspaper, the Boston Globe, has felt compelled to address the fact that the internet is putting the bereaved father on trial amid 'misinformation and lies'.

Alex Piquero, professor of sociology and criminology at the University of Miami, says: 'What concerns me most is that people jump to conclusions and affect other people's thinking without all the facts in hand. It is not instructive or helpful and can have negative consequences.'

In a further twist, a social worker called Emily Thorndike posted a TikTok video contradicting the prosecution's claim that the McLean Hospital, where Lindsay was treated for her mental health issues, offered a five star, world class service. Turning whistleblower, she 'wanted to correct the misinformation the prosecutor is using' and went viral with the claim that a single doctor was responsible for 23 patients over one holiday period.

DEFENCE attorney Reddington has now asked for Thorndike to take the stand, to the prosecution's dismay. Judge Sullivan has said he will make a ruling on the matter in due course.

'Everybody is watching this case and everybody has opinions but that doesn't always mean those opinions have no value,' says Rice of the emerging evidence. 'They may see something that everybody else misses.'

Meanwhile Patrick has said he forgives his wife and believes she was ill rather than evil. He has made no comment about the false accusations being levelled at him online nor the fact that his life is being put under a microscope by millions of strangers.

He and Lindsay have both filed separate lawsuits accusing her multiple medical providers – some of whom she only met over Zoom – of failing to properly diagnose, treat and monitor her.

If the jury find her guilty of murder, she faces life in prison without parole. If she's found not guilty because she lacked criminal responsibility, she'll be committed to a state psychiatric facility. Whatever happens, you only have to look at her in the courtroom to see that her life is ruined for ever.

The trial is set to continue for several weeks, giving online commentators more time to spout their spurious theories – to the agony of the two grieving parents at the heart of a story that could have leapt from the pages of a Greek tragedy.

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Page 28

Jailed, fake escort and lover who killed two men in sex scam

By Cameron Charters and Olivia Day

A NINE-year-old boy asked his father's killers why they didn't 'just take his money' after they fatally spiked his drink to steal from him.

In a heart-wrenching statement, Alfie Mouat said Romanian killers Adina Mihai, 31, and Madalin Dumitru, 30, had 'destroyed' his family.

The couple also killed a multi-millionaire big game hunter using the same method and administered the poison to another two men, who survived.

Mihai posed as a sex worker on website Vivastreet to trick her way into 37-year-old Gary Mouat's home in Banbury, Oxfordshire, between July 12 and 13 last year.

Once inside she slipped a sedative into Mr Mouat's wine glass and waited until he fell unconscious. He never woke up.

She then invited her boyfriend Dumitru into the house to raid it of valuables including jewellery.

The pair were jailed for 17 years at Oxford Crown Court yesterday after admitting two counts of manslaughter and administering poison to two other men.

In a pre-recorded statement,

Spiked: Gary Mouat and big game hunter Malcolm King

Guilty pleas: Adina Mihai and Madalin Dumitru

Alfie Mouat said: 'Why did you have to kill my dad? You could have just taken the money, he was really kind, he would have given it to you.

'You have ruined my life and all the plans we had to do things together. My family is destroyed now. I will never be able to go and

watch a football game with my dad now. I won't get to go have my first beer with him.'

The pair, from Ilford, Essex, also killed Malcolm King, 80, a multi-millionaire and prolific big game hunter, using the same method.

Before drugging her victims with gamma butyrolactone, known as

GBL, Mihai found out where they kept their valuables, including a Rolex watch and cash.

Mr Mouat, a successful glazing businessman, was married but his wife and son were away on the night of his death.

Passing sentence Mrs Justice Brunner said: 'If you had done

the most cursory research, you would know that GBL can be extremely toxic.'

Julian Evans KC, prosecuting, said Mihai and Dumitru's 'confidence drew upon the obviously sensitive and embarrassing nature of the activity each victim believed they had agreed to'.

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Page 29

Eden & Confidential

Fury as last orders called at the Colony Room Club

EQUIPPED with a solitary loo 'used promiscuously by men and women' alike and a proprietor who favoured a T-shirt emblazoned with the slogan 'Rehab is for quitters', the unique legend of London's Colony Room Club can surely never die.

But that hasn't prevented its closure just three years after the drinking den was triumphantly revived, its walls painted a bilious green instantly familiar to habitues of the original Soho premises, once visited by Princess Margaret and where a young Daniel Craig was a barman.

The original premises also hosted luminaries including broadcaster Melvyn Bragg and artist Tracey Emin, pictured.

The resurrected basement version nearby, which found favour with Bob Geldof, didn't expire quietly. Indeed, the scenes following its demise would, I'm told, have gladdened the heart of its founder, Muriel Belcher, a combative lesbian who greeted regulars such as artists Francis Bacon and Lucian Freud with 'Hello, c***y!', and that of her successor, Ian Board, a homosexual bruiser who drank so much that his bulbous nose 'pulsated like a rancid tomato'.

I understand that Darren Coffield, author of Tales From The Colony Room: Soho's Lost Bohemia and the artist respon-

sible for its re-creation, was livid to learn that the site was wanted by its owners. 'He said he was given eight days' notice, which was ridiculous - it didn't give him time to let everybody know,' a friend tells me.

'As soon as he heard, he rushed down with three suitcases and packed up everything he'd put in the club.' Coffield, 56, a member since 1988, had collected a treasury of its bric-a-brac - but not the AK47 assault rifle in a display case.

A spokesman for the couple who own the premises, restaurateurs Tom Onions and his wife, Prue Freeman, assures me there were 'several months' of discussion about the closure.

Describing the Colony Room's second incarnation as 'a much-loved pop-up installation,' he adds that its lifespan, initially intended to be three months, was 'extended to three years'.

I'm assured that the AK47 is being held for its owner, Dan Macmillan, grandson of prime minister Harold Macmillan and an old flame of Kate Moss, who also did a shift behind the bar.

Ex-royal chaplain: I've lost faith in King's right to rule

KING Charles has broken his Coronation oath to defend the Christian Faith, Queen Elizabeth's ex-chaplain says.

Buckingham Palace replaced the King's title as 'Defender of the Faith' with 'Protector of the Space for Faith within the Multi-faith Nation' in this year's Sovereign Grant Annual Report.

Gavin Ashenden, who quit as the Queen's chaplain after nine years having criticised a

church service at which a Muslim student was asked to read from the Quran, is horrified. He says the King 'has deserted Christian allegiance, turned his back on his Coronation oath [and] repudiated the support and promotion of a Christian culture'.

'Some are asking whether his behaviour is sufficiently subversive as to raise questions about his capacity to fulfil the office of King.'

■ KING Charles is selling prints of one of his own paintings for £10,000, but now his Royal Collection Trust wants someone to look after the work of an even more expensive artist. It's advertising for a £35,000-a-year catalogue researcher to log almost 600 drawings by Leonardo da Vinci ahead of a major publication. The advert on the royal website states: 'Based at Windsor Castle, you'll help prepare a comprehensive scholarly catalogue of the Leonardo drawings, scheduled for publication in 2030/31.'

■ IT'S the sort of thing that sweet dreams are made of - the possibility of a Eurythmics reunion. 'I think it would be sad not to,' says Dave Stewart, who formed the 1980s New Wave pop duo with Annie Lennox. 'We have a couple of recordings nobody's ever heard that we did in 2000. They're amazing - they sound like classic Eurythmics.'

■ RICHARD Osman is used to plotting fictional crimes, but his latest nearly landed him in a real-life legal drama. The author, 55, used the New Forest hotel The Pig as a setting in the 2024 bestseller We Solve Murders because he'd stayed there and knew its layout. But in his forthcoming sequel, We Chase Shadows, there's a scene in which the manager is bribed for information. 'I am not allowed to write that because that would be libellous,' says Osman. 'I thought, 'OK, I will put them in a completely different hotel'.'

Hats off to Alexa's eclipse headwear

SOLAR eclipse glasses clearly weren't enough for members of London's beau monde as they watched the sun being blocked out by the moon while on holiday.

Model and television star Alexa Chung and Bob Geldof's 35-year-old daughter Pixie wore handmade tin foil hats at a watch party in Sicily.

Pixie's even fea-

tured a sun and a moon, right, while Alexa's was a simpler affair, left.

'The watch party, when the moon mogged the sun,' wrote Alexa, 42, alongside these photographs she posted online.

The pair were joined by Pixie's husband, musician George Barnett, 38, with whom she has a five-year-old daughter.

Follow me on ✉ @richardaeden and on Instagram @edenconfidential richard.eden@dailymail.co.uk

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Page 30

Labour 'will take 40 years to hit NHS wait list target'

Numbers fall from 7m at rate of just 8,000 a month

LABOUR will take 40 years to meet the NHS waiting list target at the rate it has been treating patients, damning analysis suggests.

It means Britons face decades more misery, with painfully long waits for

By Shaun Wooller

Health Editor

routine procedures such as hip and knee replacements.

The Government has vowed to treat 92 per cent of patients within 18 weeks of

receiving a GP referral by March 2029. That would require the waiting list to fall from today's 7.27million to about 3.5million – a rate of 114,000 a month.

But NHS England figures show it managed to cut the waiting list by an average of just 7,962 per month over the

past year, despite burning through billions of pounds. At this pace it will take 40 years to get the waiting list down to 3.5million.

Stuart Andrew, the shadow health secretary, said: 'Forty years to meet

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'Must get a grip on the crisis'

Labour's own NHS waiting list target shows just how far they are falling short.

'Labour must stop pretending its failing waiting list plan is working and get a grip on the crisis.'

Health Secretary Yvette Cooper thanked NHS staff for 'their extraordinary efforts over this hugely challenging summer' as the waiting list has fallen in June for the first time since 2011. Some 65.8 per cent of patients began hospital treatment within 18 weeks of referral in June.

KUROSU

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Ephraim Hardcastle

PROFESSIONAL

Mancunian Nick Robinson (actually from 20 miles

away in Macclesfield) celebrates Andy Burnham making 'Manchesterism' all the rage. Recently receiving an honorary doctorate from the University of Manchester, the Radio 4 presenter giddily enthused to students that the city was 'a living, breathing, buzzing example of how life can get better, of how people can make the world a better place'. Robbo now concedes: 'Reading those words back makes me cringe ever so slightly.' Sign the old booby up, Andy.

WHILE Burnham bangs the northern drum, royal enthusiasm for the English provinces north of Norfolk appears thin on the ground. 'The only royal northern dukedom (York) is obviously best not mentioned,' notes a palace aide. Matters improve further up the road: 'Princess Margaret was the last royal to be officially born in Scotland, in 1930, I'm reminded. Though Archie may have been conceived at the Castle of Mey in Caithness.'

WITH his discredited autobiography first hitting the shelves in the US, might imaginative ex-Cambridge professor Jason Arday enjoy the backing of fellow memoirist Prince Harry? The latter wrote in 2023: 'There's just as much truth in what I remember and how I remember it as there is in so-called objective facts.' The history boys of our age!

MAINTAINING a (tiresome?) annual tradition that sees him remind disappointed A-level students he's among life's winners - despite earning a 'C and two Us' in the 1970s - Jeremy Clarkson says: 'This evening, I shall sit in my agreeable garden, drinking beer from my own brewery and eating food from my own farm. Prepared by my own chef.'

PERRY BBC cricket presenter Alex Hartley, pictured, recalls turning hot under the collar when finding herself locking eyes with Hugh Grant on a crowded train. Though

apparently no movie buff, the former England international insisted on taking cheeky snaps of the old charmer when he dozed off. It was later pointed out to the Lancashire lass that she'd been photographing comedian Rob Brydon.

TAKING exception to unflattering AI images of his band Queen, Sir Brian May walls: 'Maybe this is the time to realise we don't actually need AI!' Brian however admits he isn't averse to cashing in with Abba-style hologram concerts, showing the band in their prime.

COUNTING himself responsible for Rod Liddle's departure from the BBC after he'd publicly mocked a Countryside Alliance march in 2002, former Telegraph editor Charles Moore writes in The Spectator: 'Incredibly, the BBC did what I demanded and sacked Rod. Almost immediately, I felt the assassin's remorse.' Moore however cheerfully concludes: 'His release from the captivity of Broadcasting House was the best thing that ever happened to him.'

Email: ephraim.hardcastle@dailymail.co.uk

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Page 31

Secrets & Lives

That's someone who tries to have sex with you while they're sound asleep. And as Jodie discovered, this bizarre condition can wreak havoc on a loving relationship

THE night was hot and sticky as I tossed the duvet aside, twisting and turning as I attempted to get some sleep.

Next to me Matt, my partner of five years, lay dead to the world and I envied his ability to sleep whatever the temperature.

But no sooner had I finally nodded off than I was woken up

by JODIE GARRAWAY

by Matt climbing on top of me, pushing my legs apart with his knees. It took me a moment to register what was going on.

But no, this wasn't some bizarre dream, my boyfriend really did seem to be trying to

have sex with me, a familiar glazed look in his eyes.

I couldn't think of anything I wanted less at the time and, thankfully, once I'd shouted his name and shaken him, he collapsed on top of me, snoring softly. After rolling him back onto his side of the bed, I managed to catch a few, uninterrupted, hours of sleep before my alarm went off.

My reaction might seem sur-

TURN TO NEXT PAGE

Picture: GETTY IMAGES Printed by models

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Page 32

SECRETARÍA & LITRES

The shame of being sacked by my cleaner (twice!)

Richard GETTY

PERHAPS it's my fault for having five children, five dogs and two cats (plus four chickens and one horse, though they can't be held responsible for Lego on the floor and fistfuls of fur on the sofa). My house is a perma-mess.

And this, surely, is why cleaners keep sacking me. For the great unspoken rule of the merry-go-round that is hiring and, crucially, keeping a cleaner is that your house must essentially be pristine before they come.

When we first moved into our six-bedroom Essex farmhouse, we had only three children, and the tide of plastic toys and clumps of cat hair had not yet infiltrated.

Not many months after our arrival, however, I looked out of the kitchen window and realized the bucolic scene outside was increasingly obscured by bluebottle-filled cobwebs and grubby handprints. I saw the light - or rather, didn't - and realized the house was becoming a health hazard.

In the beginning we used agency cleaners, who arrived looking as lacklustre as the murky water in their bucket. I remember eyeing the filthy mop and knowing they hadn't rinsed it out since the last job. Not a good start.

WHEN I asked one of the cleaning duo to iron some shirts, she did it one-handed, which wasn't a sign of great ironing proficiency but to leave the other hand free to hold her phone.

We decided to find a non-agency cleaner with whom we could establish a relationship. A local. Someone who would get to know our family's fobies and wouldn't leave new creases in my husband's shirts.

The first lady who turned up for an interview - on reflection, this was very much her interviewing us - said she would need six hours a week to tackle the house. Six hours! She was right, but that made her too expensive.

So we lured someone with lower standards - significantly lower.

This was the cleaner who, when one of the dogs had an

by SYBILLA HART

accident on the kitchen floor, sucked up the poo through the pole of my bagless Shark vacuum.

When I questioned this, my mind boggling and the Shark stinking no matter how much disinfectant I poured into it, she said she couldn't bend down to pick up the offending article because of her bad back.

Well, I was nine months pregnant and couldn't do it either. The house was quite literally going to the dogs. We had a contretemps and she sacked me as a client.

Then a friend mentioned Anna, who had a reputation as a cleaning wizard. But she warned I would never get a slot with Anna. Not only did she have a waiting list, she would surely raise her eyebrows at my menagerie of children and animals. Still, it was worth a call.

In the end I think Anna took pity on me, agreeing - after some instant begging - to squeeze me into her schedule for a mutually acceptable three hours a week.

I was over the moon. Anna whipped round the house dusting each room with her array of precisely defined coloured cloths. As she popped the sodden mop head into a plastic bag to take home to wash at her house, I breathed a sigh of relief.

She didn't even seem to mind the surfeit of Peppa Pig merchandise, nor the muddy paw prints. Anna was heaven-sent and I was in love.

Even more so, considering the state of the house by the time she started. I had just had my fifth child and won't pretend it was anything other than a tip.

The children were, by then, 12, nine, six and four, plus a newborn, and I was either breastfeeding or looking after the little ones. Tidying fell

right to the bottom of the (huge laundry) pile.

This didn't seem to face wonderful Anna... at first. But as time went on the cracks began to show.

One day, a couple of years after she'd started with us, I was sitting on the sofa juggling a toddler and my work laptop when I apologised that the house was a mess.

For the first time, I noticed a small shift in the atmosphere. 'No change there then Sybilla,' she replied, a hint of steel in her eyes.

Granted, it had not been a good morning; a child had smothered one of the dogs with Sudocrem and my favourite Valentino Waterlily blusher had somehow upended itself on the bedsheets.

I looked around. The place was worse even than usual. Had Anna's weekly visits lulled me into a false sense of security? Had I stopped even trying?

SO I attempted to up my game, but the die was cast. Even the most saintly, professional cleaner has her limits, and I started to receive messages from Anna with a whole manner of excuses as to why she couldn't come. Her car wouldn't start. She had a cold. So did her child. And the dog.

When she did come, there was a new attitude. A permanent side-eye at the state of the place, a grunt of displeasure upon opening a bedroom door, an audible sign as she contemplated the bathroom. Her judgmental stare was making me feel increasingly embarrassed.

By the time my youngest started nursery aged three, she'd had enough. Yes, I was sacked as a client again.

All the fur was triggering her allergies, she said, and the mess she found upon arrival made cleaning the house akin to wading through treacle.

For a while I grieved her absence. Then I rolled up my sleeves and decided to do it myself in a bi-weekly cleaning frenzy. I rope in the kids and my husband too and somehow we get through it.

The house is reasonably clean now, though as messy as ever. But at least the only person judging me for it is me.

■ ANNA'S name has been changed.

FROM PREVIOUS PAGE

prisingly calm given my boyfriend's behaviour - not to mention the fact this wasn't the first time it had happened.

But it was because I'd experienced this aggressive nocturnal sexual attention before that I knew not to panic. Because Matt's eyes were glazed, not with lust, but with sleep. Matt's GP agrees that he shows all the signs of sexomnia, a sleep disorder in which sufferers carry out sexual activity - whether it's masturbating or even attempting to have intercourse - while they are fully asleep.

A type of parasomnia - an activity or behaviour that happens during sleep - it typically occurs because of a blurring between the conscious and unconscious part of the sleep cycle. As in Matt's case, sufferers have no recollection of their actions when they wake up the next day.

But while most of us have some experience of other parasomnias, such as sleepwalking and sleep talking, sexomnias is much rarer - and more disturbing.

Until I started researching Matt's increasingly troubling night-time behaviour, I had barely heard of the condition. It's estimated that only 1 to 2 per cent of the population will

MATT'S EYES WERE GLAZED ...WITH SLEEP

experience it at some point in their lives and is reported to be more common in men.

But sexomnias has received increasing publicity in recent years because of the rise in the number of men using it as a defence in rape cases. Last year, an Australian man was cleared of having non-consensual sex with a woman after he claimed he'd suffered an episode.

In 2024, a British woman successfully sued the CPS for £350,000 after her alleged rapist was acquitted before he was due to stard trial after two sleep experts claimed she could have been affected by sexomnia. Offering her an apology, the CPS admitted that the case should not have been dropped.

The associations with sexual assault explains why Matt was horrified when I eventually told him what had been happening. I, too, have been afraid to share my experiences with even my closest friends in case people judge him negatively.

While some may suspect that he's just been trying it on with me at night, I truly believe that he has no idea of what he's doing.

Ironically, it was only after I confided in him about what he'd been doing that our relationship came close to breaking point, more than it ever had been when he'd been trying to molest me in his sleep.

Both in our early 30s and working in finance, we got together five years ago after meeting through mutual friends at a birthday party. With similar libidos, we enjoyed an enthusiastic sex life and would fall asleep in each other's arms with no issues.

Then, two years ago, we made the decision to move in together. It was just a couple of months after setting up a home that Matt's nocturnal habits began to change.

Initially, it was a wandering hand cupping my breast or a rogue erection I could feel when he spooned me and was happening a couple of times a month. While it woke me up, I took

it as a compliment - he even fancied me when he was asleep! So when it started happening more frequently I was smug, not concerned.

But as time went on, the erections started to be accompanied with a thrusting motion and increased to at least twice a week.

I'd elbow him in the ribs and try to turn him over, all of which he snored his way through.

But because I was so startled, having been woken around 2am, I'd not get back to sleep until 4am.

Sleep-deprived, I became irritable and my coffee intake went through the roof.

And it wasn't just the lack of sleep that was unsettling me. While we were making love regularly - at least once a week - he seemed more turned on when he was unconscious than when he was awake.

I was unsettled enough that I mentioned the erections to him. Was he having dreams about another woman, I asked him nervously?

Matt told me most men have erections when they sleep, insisting there wasn't anything else going on.

A quick Google search reassured me this is completely normal and caused by fluctuating hormone levels during REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep cycles.

But over the following six months the thrusting started to get more aggressive and Matt began clamping his leg over me as he did it, gripping on to my shoulders or waist as he attempted to climb on top of me.

My elbowing turned to hard shoving to get him off.

He also graduated to trying to take off my pyjamas and attempting to force his hand between my legs, all of which I fended off.

I was getting more concerned but didn't say anything, not wanting to embarrass him or throw a spanner in the works at a time when he and I were both already stressed at work.

I realise why some women might be terrified but I was never scared.

Matt has never laid a hand on me in a violent or threatening way and it never occurred to me that he would. Every time, I was able to push him off easily.

It was, however, disturbing - and very, very annoying.

While not working the subject directly, I started asking pointed questions the morning after an 'event', such as, 'Did you have any word dreams last night?' and, 'How did you sleep?'

Remixed, he usually said he'd slept fine. But I started to get snappy with him because I was so tired.

Date nights ended in bickering and little things around the house sent me into a rage: shoes in a heap at the door, washing up left to fester.

I felt like I was living with someone I didn't fully know and had no idea how to approach it. Not to mention the sense that I was keeping something from him, which I also found distressing.

And throughout it all, at the back of mind, I was worried it was all because there was someone he fancied more than me who was inspiring his night-time lust.

Our waking love life began to suffer too, taking a hit from my lack of sleep and fears that Matt wasn't attracted to me.

Several months passed like this and then, right before we were due to go on holiday, his middle of the night activities seemed to subside.

We went away, where we both slept like babies, and I hoped Matt's bizarre behaviours had stopped. Perhaps the cause had been stress at work! He had recently been promoted, so that would make sense.

But once we returned home his pestering only ratcheted up again. It wasn't always unwelcome. One

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SECRETS & LIFES

Page 33

Picture: GETTY IMAGES Posed by models

way to diagnose it. Diagnosis usually involves a sleep study where the patient stays overnight and their brain waves, heart rate, breathing, oxygen levels and movements are all monitored. Accounts from partners are also taken into account.

However, sleep expert Dr Oliver Bernath – who sees sexomnia cases in both men and women at his sleep disorders centre at Queen Victoria Hospital in West Sussex – told me it can still be difficult to establish what's really going on.

'This ambivalence adds to the strain this condition typically places on a couple,' he says. 'These conditions are medically benign – not associated with any brain disease – but the behaviours can be problematic.'

'The impact of this condition on couples who share a bed can be anything from annoyance, to feeling forced to sleep separately, even to rape allegations.'

He also says that, despite what

"Matt began clamping his leg over me, gripping on to my shoulders or waist. My elbowing turned to hard shoving to get him off – yet he was fast asleep..."

evening after a romantic date night, which had included a few too many cocktails, we wobbled home and collapsed into bed.

Too tired and tipsy for sex we kissed and fell asleep immediately.

But in the early hours of the morning I awoke to find him pushing himself into my back.

On this occasion I confess I was turned on by it. He then turned me over and started undressing us both and we made love.

'Though he seemed to be responding as normal, looking back the signs were there – he didn't say anything to me, whereas usually there'd be sounds of appreciation or encouragement and his eyes were glazed over.

He didn't finish, which I attributed to the cocktails, and was snoring again almost instantly afterwards, which left me miffed. I'd at least expected a cuddle.

The next morning, when I told him I'd been surprised, if not entirely unappreciative, at our night-time liaison, he had no recollection of it.

The mood turned sour immediately. I was upset he hadn't realised, or even been mentally involved and also felt uncomfortable, as though I'd exploited him.

I felt horribly conflicted; he hadn't remembered it but at the same time his body had reacted as if he had known what he was doing. I began to withdraw from Matt, no longer snuggling up on the sofa or offering more than a peck on the lips because I felt uncomfortable and confused around him.

While he didn't comment on it, he seemed sadder too and didn't

try to instigate intimacy, so I wonder if he felt similarly conflicted about what had happened.

Then, almost six weeks later, I woke up to a strange sound.

Frightened, I sat up to listen and realised the sound was from in the room.

Matt was curled up next to me, facing away and, as I went to put my hand on his shoulder to wake him up, I realised he was masturbating aggressively but appeared to be completely asleep.

Then he stopped, rolled on to his back and let out a huge snore.

HE TOLD ME HE FELT LIKE A FREAK

I was so shocked; it no longer felt like it could be explained away as a physical reaction to a saucy dream or even an attraction to me. It was unnerving to see him doing that while looking totally asleep.

Afterwards, I stayed awake for hours researching what I'd seen.

It was the first time I came across the term sexomnia, including in news articles about rape cases and Reddit threads of first-hand accounts.

I felt we'd reached the point where I had to tell Matt what had been going on. As soon as he woke up the next morning, I laid out the details of the past 18 months. He was utterly mortified

and quite distressed. Apart from me telling him about the nighttime erections, he had no idea anything had been happening.

Matt told me tearly that it made him feel 'rapey' and like 'a freak'. He hated the idea that he had no idea what he was doing in his sleep.

I asked whether, to his knowledge, this had happened before, and he said no.

No previous girlfriends had ever mentioned anything.

He peppered me with questions: Had he ever hurt me? Did he say anything while he was doing it?

And then, most heartbreakingly, did I still want to be with him?

To which I responded with a heartfelt 'yes', adding that I was sure there were things that could be done to help.

Part of Matt's horror was because the only time he had ever heard of the term was during a high-profile rape case last August, in which violent thug Dean Final claimed to suffer from sexomnia in a bid to walk free after raping two women.

While Final, 32, was nonetheless convicted, the connection did little to soothe Matt who, for the next few weeks, would wake up every morning with a worried look on his face, asking me if he'd touched me in his sleep again.

I was heartbroken seeing him so

anxious and on the mornings I confirmed that he hadn't he would breathe a sigh of relief.

But the fear that he might do something was clearly affecting him profoundly and he began to withdraw from sex altogether.

The result was that I felt rejected and unattractive, while my loving boyfriend felt awkward, and we started bickering.

Without any intimacy I was worried we wouldn't last.

We had a frank conversation about the state of our love life on the sofa one evening and I explained I couldn't carry on like this – that I was worried we were breaking up and that I regretted ever telling him about his nighttime activities. Matt said he felt tainted and was worried that if we had sex he might then do something extreme or violent later that night.

It wasn't until a weekend away in Cornwall recently after a few drinks, giddy and sunburnt, that Matt felt confident enough to vanquish that particular bogeyman.

He has since been to see the GP and he's now waiting for a referral to a sleep specialist.

Sexomnia presents a challenge because, while it was officially recognised in the International Classification of Sleep Disorders in 2005, there is no standardised

IT'S NOT LINKED TO SEX DREAMS

I'd feared about what might be going on in Matt's dreams, this activity is typically not associated with dreams of a sexual nature.

Instead, it happens during a partial awakening from so-called Non-Rapid Eye Movement (NREM) sleep, as opposed to the deeper REM sleep in which we dream.

I don't know yet if there's a 'cure' or if this is something Matt will have for the rest of his life.

Dr Bernath says the behaviour can be triggered by lifestyle factors including drinking too much, stress and a lack of sleep but that no definitive cause has been found and it's unclear why it impacts some people and not others.

Interestingly, there's no known link to hormone levels or libido. For most it's episodic and can be managed with a healthy sleep routine, including no screens before lights out and a regular bedtime. Dr Bernath says treatment also involves relaxation techniques and, beyond that, medications such as antidepressants can help.

Matt is now trying his hardest to drink less and have a healthy bedtime routine.

Now, instead of being woken up a couple of times a week, it's once every few months and I'm open to him about it the next morning when it happens. He is less anxious about it too.

Perhaps most importantly, our waking sex life – and our relationship – is back on track.

■ Jodie Garraway is a pseudonym. Names and identifying details have been changed.

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Page 34

SECRETS & LIFES

NOWADAYS, if you're looking to meet that special someone then it's accepted that dating apps are the first port of call.

But the role of the professional matchmaker is far from dead. Singletons are feeling increasingly jaded about the superficiality of 'swipe' culture and want to get back to a more personal experience.

I should know. I've spent the last 26 years bringing together those who want to find love.

Yes, in many ways the job has changed since the arrival of the apps. We're no longer simply introducing you to people you wouldn't ordinarily meet, but hand-picking the right fit, from hobbies to aspirations.

We're also seeing those who have come out of a long relationship or been widowed, who need guidance because the dating scene has evolved so much.

But some things never change. There's still no better feeling than when two people find each other. I've helped make thousands of matches and have even been invited to some of the weddings.

The majority of my clients are delightful but sadly some of the appalling behaviour - and outrageous requests - I've witnessed over the years show me that some people just aren't deserving of Cupid's arrow.

People are far more demanding nowadays. Apps have gotten them into unhelpful habits. Don't like what you see? Keep swiping until you do. It's made people forget that it's important to dig deeper.

Our clients come from professional backgrounds and are aged from their late twenties right up to their 80s.

THEY often specify their ideal height, hair and eye colour.

A lot of men will also tell us they would only date someone a size 10 or below. As for women, most want their partner to be tall.

Yet one of the key things women now look for is men with emotional intelligence. They

The man who had a facelift, but would NOT date a woman who used Botox...

PHOTO: GETTY O'DONNELL BY MORELLE

And other divas I've met in 26 years of matchmaking

want someone mature and on the same page as them, but who will respect their independence.

While being too picky means our matches may miss out on meeting some amazing people, we try our best to accommodate preferences that are reasonable. Some, however, are totally unreasonable.

One male client in his late 50s said he would only date women 20 years younger - but that he did not want more children.

When we told him that women in this age bracket would think

he was too old, plus most women in their 30s are looking for someone to start a family with, he asked for a refund. He didn't get one.

Then there was the 63-year-old male client who'd had a hair transplant and a facelift... yet complained about a woman who told him she had Botox. He said he only liked 'natural' women. In such cases, it's a pleasure to point out the double standard.

But it's not just men who present problems.

Following an evening with a

man who was going bald, a client in her 70s stated she only wanted dates with full heads of hair. Given she wanted to meet someone in their 70s or 80s, we had to point out we're matchmakers - not miracle workers.

Then, after three further dates with different men, she demanded a full refund, because she wanted someone who shared her passion for gardening.

It wasn't that her latest date didn't like gardening - he did! - but she said she only liked to grow fruit and vegetables, while

he loved tending to his flowers. Again, no refund.

We've also had many requests for matches with people who work in specific industries.

A lady in her 50s tasked us with finding her a successful artist. A mere passion for painting would not suffice.

WE had to tell her that if she didn't budge on this 'must have', she would narrow her chances of romantic success.

In the end, we found her a (non-artist) chap who proved the perfect match.

It goes to show that in reality, most of us end up falling for someone completely unexpected.

I get it, expectations are high when you've spent money. Our memberships cost between £1,000 and £3,000 for six months, paid upfront. For that, we send three hand-picked matches per month.

If an issue raised about a potential match is trivial, we encourage our clients to be open-minded.

Some will come around with gentle feedback - but there are some where we've had to terminate their membership.

Some men have been reported to us for being far too handy on a first date. Some are misogynistic. They have no place on our books.

While we've never needed to report someone to the police, we will let other matchmakers know to be on the look out if someone has been particularly unsavoury.

I'm far from the only matchmaker with a few horror stories.

Another once told me that she'd set a 30-something female client up on a second date.

After the man failed to arrive at the restaurant, the client got a call from the police to say he'd been involved in a traffic accident and was in hospital. The police had called her as she was the last person he rang.

The next day she phoned the matchmaker, outraged at the police intrusion.

No wonder we often feel like screaming 'don't shoot the matchmaker!' But in the name of true love, we'll keep calm and carry on.

■ Lorraine Adams is group CEO of Gorgeous Networks, which runs several dating agencies

As told to MARYLOU COSTA

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Sharing the things that make me feel bad about myself, so you'll feel better

@bryonygordon

BRYONY GORDON

Page 35

I used to fancy Brad Pitt... now he's just a sad old man with a drink problem

AS a middle-aged woman with a pulse, it's not often I look at Brad Pitt and experience a crushing sense of disappointment.

But, this week, I had this curious sensation as I read the interview Pitt did with Esquire magazine, in which he revealed that after seven years of sobriety, he's started drinking again.

'I got back off the wagon,' he told the magazine. 'In a more restrained manner, I got overconfident a couple of times went, Yep, nope, not good for me. Not in big quantities.'

The journalist then asked the single most dangerous question you can pose to someone who's quit drinking due to a problematic relationship with alcohol: can you now have a glass of wine?

Oh, sure, it might seem totally innocent if you're the kind of human who can pour a small amount of rose out of a bottle then put it back in the fridge door for the rest of the week. But Pitt is clearly not that, admitting that he attended Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. His divorce from Angelina Jolie had prompted him to quit the booze in late 2016.

Pitt is, by his own admission, a problem drinker, and asking a problem drinker if they can have the odd glass of wine is a bit like asking someone with a nut allergy if they can occasionally treat themselves to a Blackers bar.

But to be fair to the interviewer, Pitt also seems to have misunderstood the nature of sobriety and alcoholism. 'Well, I can have a few (glasses of wine),' he told the interviewer. 'But I can't have a lot, I have to be professional about it.'

And in just a few deluded sentences, I went from fancying Brad Pitt to pitying him. Because in my experience, once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic. Being able to abstain from booze for long periods of time doesn't prove you can drink responsibly -

or 'professionally', as Pitt refers to it - it just proves that you can't drink. And in saying otherwise, Pitt is doing some of the most terrible acting of his career.

Perhaps I'm being uncharitable. Maybe Pitt really has pulled off the almost impossible, and taught himself to moderate his alcohol intake after finding himself in a situation where things got so bad, he was forced to remove his 'drinking privileges' (his own words).

But in my nine years of sobriety, I've not yet met anyone who's succeeded in doing this.

HOWEVER, I have seen plenty of people who've relapsed, and tried to convince themselves (and everyone around them) that they've got things under control. But they usually crawl back to sobriety with their tail between their legs - if they're very lucky. Many never make it back, living out their lives in alcoholic misery and squalor.

And this is why I'm so disappointed by 62-year-old Pitt's public pronouncement. Because he must know, deep down in his soul, how unhelpful such declarations are to a community where denial and delusion aren't just pitiful - in many cases, they can be deadly.

I know too many alcoholics who have lost everything in their attempts to drink like a normal person. I imagine that, given Pitt has been to a few AA meetings, he has encountered these people

Pitt/News: JOHN SALANGANG/SHEFFERSTOCK, NEW MEXICO/POSTERSTOCK

When peri-menopause meets pregnancy...

THE world is so unused to seeing women's bodies that when Anne Hathaway shows off her pregnancy bump, social media starts saying it's fake. I personally love that the 43-year-old actress is displaying her 'geriatric' pregnancy for all to see. She clearly couldn't give a damn what anyone thinks - which is exactly what you'd expect when peri-menopause meets pregnancy!

too. What message is he now sending out to a world which already misunderstands addiction and alcoholism?

When I was in active addiction, I'd see those 'drink responsibly' signs on the back of wine bottles and wonder what was wrong with me. I was an alcoholic, of course, but the shame attached to that word was so big I went out of my way to prove it didn't apply to me. It was only after a series of

increasingly dangerous scrapes that I realised it was going to be much easier to simply accept I was one - and that I was lucky to be alive by this point.

One of the things you learn, when you finally come to terms with your alcoholism, is that drinking nothing is genuinely easier than trying to only have one or two. Alcohol lights me up like a Christmas tree; once I start, I don't stop. There is a truth we all

Time you quit social media, Jan

JAN LEEMING has got into a spot of bother again after criticising the presenting skills of ITV News' Charlene White. 'She has such a condescending style,' wrote Leeming (pictured) on X, apparently without irony.

Her remarks come just months after she used the social media site to complain about children being allowed in restaurants. In fact, she seems to spend most of her time online whingeing. She's now quit X for a few days due to 'vile abuse' she's received after her Charlene comments. Maybe stay off it for good, Jan. As the old adage goes: if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

I LOVED watching the eclipse on holiday with friends in Cornwall, where there was almost 95 per cent coverage. We adults were enchanted, the children less so - they complained it took too long and didn't look as good as it did in the clips they'd watched on YouTube. Honestly: the youth of today!

Why I'm glad I never vaped

ANGELA RAYNER has admitted she can't quit vaping, as she launches a crackdown on e-cigarette shops. I'm glad I got off cigarettes cold turkey, instead of vaping. Every time I see someone sucking on a piece of bright pink plastic, I realise I narrowly escaped swapping one nasty habit for an even more addictive - not to mention embarrassing - one.

learn, in recovery: that for us, one drink is too many, a thousand is never enough. And this is why I don't believe a word Pitt said in his Esquire interview.

After their break-up, Angelina Jolie filed a lawsuit in which she claimed Pitt threw alcohol over her and their children while on a private jet. Though the actor vehemently denies these claims, not a single one of their six children is said to speak to Pitt now, with several of them recently filing to legally remove his surname from theirs.

Reports say that Jolie 'is not surprised' her ex-husband is drinking again, and suddenly you realise this is not some superficial drama, but a situation involving children that is kind of tragic.

Take away the Hollywood gloss and the magazine covers, and the truth is Brad Pitt isn't actually anyone special. He's just a sad, old man in the grip of a relapse.

No wonder Cornwall hates all these tourists

I WASN'T surprised to read about the couple who caused almost £5,000 worth of damage breaking the safety barriers of a Cornish campsite.

The pair were trying to leave in their VW van at 2am to pick up their teenage children from a nearby festival, despite campsite rules explicitly stating the accommodation would be locked just

before midnight to keep campers safe. Sadly, their entitled behaviour is par for the course down here. In the past few days, I've seen families playing loud music and having giant barbecues on the beach, as well as people refusing to clean up after their dogs. No wonder the locals are sick of tourists.

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Page 36

SECRETS & LIFES

WE ALL love the idea of a quick fix. So when our Instagram feeds start promising that with a few simple steps you can beat bad posture, niggling pains and even become more attractive for free, our attention is piqued.

The secret? Your fascia – a part of the body most of us didn't know existed until it became the latest wellness buzzword. No matter your problem, it seems a 'fascia reset' is the answer.

Some posts even show before and after pictures of how a neck hump, which affects a lot of us due to our frequent laptop and phone use, can be banished by tackling your fascia.

But what is your fascia? How are you supposed to fix it? And can doing this really cure you of everything from midlife stiffness to long pent-up trauma?

Fascia is a thin, connective tissue which envelops the muscles and connects them to bones, tendons and ligaments.

'Think of it as a continuous, three-dimensional web, made mostly of the protein collagen, which wraps and links almost everything inside you,' explains chartered physiotherapist Neil Mead, author of How To Be Your Own Physio.

'Fascia gives the body structure, lets muscles glide smoothly over one another and helps to share out force, so that when one part of you moves, the load is distributed through the system rather than staying in one spot.'

According to Mead, views on the importance of fascia have shifted over the last couple of decades.

'We've learned that fascia is not just packing material, but one of the richest sensory tissues in the body,' she says.

'It is estimated that the fascial network may contain as many as 250million nerve endings, which is why any muscle or fascial issues can cause so much pain.'

For example, when you pull a muscle, the intense pain is due to the sensory nerves in the fascia surrounding it.

But while we all understand such injuries, seeing posts that your 'right' and 'dehydrated' fascia is causing you problems is less clear.

So what can go wrong with your fascia and why?

Mead explains that problems arise when the fascia becomes less mobile, often due to a sedentary lifestyle.

'Layers that should slide over each other start to stick a little,' she says. 'This tends to happen after injury, surgery or long periods of not moving a particular area. It can thicken, or become more sensitive, and there is some evidence that long-term stress can gradually stiffen the tissue as well.'

However, that doesn't mean the fascia is responsible for quite as many ills as social media would have you believe.

Mead says: 'The idea that this one thing is behind your neck hump, your stiffness and your aches, simply hasn't been proven. Yes, this tissue can be a source of soreness, stiff-

Can fixing a thirsty fascia really cure every little pain?

by CLAIRE COLEMAN

ness and a feeling of restriction. But that's because it is so richly supplied with nerve endings.

'When someone feels sore or stiff, it is usually very difficult – even for a clinician – to say how much is coming from muscle, how much from joint, how much from nerve and how much from fascia.'

Similarly, she says, if your posture is poor, the fascia in an area might thicken, 'but it's the passenger not the driver'.

So a qualified physiotherapist would never look to treat a problem by looking at your fascia in isolation.

THAT said, not all the advice about the benefits of 'resetting' your fascia is untrue. It just might not be as simplistic as it is suggested.

For example, if a social media post warns that your fascia is 'dehydrated' and requires specific movements to tackle it – often a series of exercises or stretches, similar to sun salutations in yoga – they are mistakenly conflating your fascia with poor lymphatic drainage.

Mead explains that while such movements could make you feel better, you won't be specifically targeting your fascia by doing this.

'Movement genuinely does help to shift fluid around the body,' she says. 'Unlike your blood, which is driven by the heart, your lymphatic system

[which helps to drain waste] has no central pump. It relies on the squeeze of your muscles, on your breathing, and on the pulse of nearby arteries to move fluid and lymph along.'

'So when you spend ten minutes doing gentle, mindful movement, you really are helping fluid to drain and circulate, and that can leave you feeling less sluggish and looking less puffy.'

'Fascia responds well to varied, regular loading; taking your joints through their full range, stretching, resistance training, and simply moving in lots of directions rather than the same few.'

But Mead adds: 'The tools being sold for 'fascia release' (foam rollers, massage balls or a programme of holds and rolls) are the same tools we have used for muscle work for years.'

'The claim that there is a separate, special category of 'fascia work' which reaches a tissue that ordinary stretching and rolling can't is not well supported.'

'You're not physically remoulding your fascia, you're turning down the volume on your nervous system's protective tension, which loosens things temporarily. That is genuinely useful.'

'But it is not a cure and it will not last unless you follow it with strengthening and better movement habits.'

In short, a fascia programme won't banish your neck hump or severe, ongoing pain.

But if you're looking to move more, feel more energetic and a bit less bloated, then you could see some benefits – at least in the short-term.

■ Find out more at hoxtobe yourownphysio.com

ISIT patiently as the final touches are made to my hair and make-up. A smiling bridesmaid slips a glass of bubbly into my hand, and a gorgeous white gown hangs in the corner.

'This should be the happiest day of my life, the one I've spent 18 months meticulously planning. But while a wedding celebration will still take place today, there will be no ceremony – because the groom is nowhere to be found.'

Just seven days before we were supposed to pledge our lives to one another, Alex, my partner of six-and-a-half years, sat in our kitchen and quietly said, 'I just feel like we shouldn't get married.'

Remembering those eight devastating words, my eyes fill up. But while I know most women jilted just days before their wedding would hide away, overwhelmed with humiliation and heartbreak, I refuse to be one of them. I may not be getting married today, but there is going

to be a party, complete with wedding dress, bridesmaids and toasts to the bride. It will still be my big day.

When I met Alex online in 2020, at the age of 30, I wasn't in a rush to find 'the one'. I'd seen friends panic as the years passed, settling for guys that weren't nearly good enough for them. I wasn't going to let that happen to me.

But I clicked with Alex, 31, almost immediately. He was handsome and ambitious, a fellow business owner, and had a calm that balanced out my own more frenetic energy. Within months we were in love and after a year had moved in together.

My family and friends liked Alex, especially my mum, who loved the fact he'd pop round and help her with anything she needed around the house. I'm very close to her and my two sisters, so their opinions meant a lot.

The next four years were happy ones. We travelled and bought a three-bedroom detached house in Liverpool. I loved putting down those roots together.

I knew Alex wanted a baby one day, and while I'd never felt my biological clock ticking, I was definitely open to the idea. Then, in 2024, I lost £50,000 in a business scam. I was devastated and as I worked every hour to rebuild things, I felt the first cracks in our relationship.

I'd always been the positive, upbeat one, helping Alex through bumps in

'I REFUSE TO HIDE ON MY BIG DAY'

his life. Now it was my turn to be vulnerable, and as I battled with the relentless stress, he struggled. It was as if our relationship didn't work if I wasn't the cheerleader for us both.

But I pushed those thoughts aside, focusing everything I had on fixing the problems in my business and believing that once they passed, Alex and I would return to the happy couple we'd been before.

On New Year's Eve 2024, on a beach in Thailand, Alex proposed. It was a beautiful moment and I didn't hesitate to say yes.

We both loved Italy and I spent a lot of time there due to my business, Think! Wine Group, which imports my wines from Italy, so we decided that's where we wanted to say 'I do'.

We had a wonderful time visiting venues, trying delicious food, gazing at beautiful views and imagining saying our vows. It was so romantic, and I'd never felt more connected to Alex.

There was one stunning venue we both instantly loved.

Set up in the Tuscan hills, it had a church for the ceremony, grounds that included a pool and enough space for all 50 guests to stay. It was the perfect place for the three-day event I had in mind, with a welcome dinner, wedding-day feast and a next-day pool party.

Back at home I took the lead. I

by KATHERINE JONES

loved planning things and it proved a welcome distraction from work pressures.

But while we picked the suits and the rings together, Alex didn't show any interest as I chose flowers, entertainers and decor.

I did feel a dart of annoyance as the months passed, surely he should have an opinion? Then again, I told myself, many men left it all to the brides-to-be, and he was also busy with work.

My favourite part was choosing my dress with my mum, sisters and auntie in October last year. After trying on what seemed like a million options, I walked out of the changing room in a £2,000, long-sleeved lace gown and saw my auntie begin to cry. I felt transformed.

Sadly, even that excitement couldn't hide the fact I was struggling – and Alex wasn't stepping up. I loved my job, but in December, after three months of work stress leaving me constantly on the edge of tears, I couldn't hide it any longer.

'Alex, I feel so alone,' I said, 'and you're not supporting me. What's going on?' 'I don't think we've been getting on,' he replied quietly, 'And I'm not happy with how things are between us.'

Part of me was relieved Alex was finally telling me how he felt, but I was also horrified to hear him confirm there was a problem. 'Oh my God, we're getting married in seven months.' I replied.

'I know,' he said, clearly upset. 'We need to spend time together and really work on our relationship.'

'That's exactly what we did. There were long talks and bike rides where we just enjoyed being together. We felt closer than ever and my fears receded. I couldn't wait to be husband and wife.'

By May this year, our original £20,000 budget had become a distant memory. Including my hen do in Spain, the total spend was over £30,000 – half paid for by my parents, the other half by us. I told myself it would be worth it.

Then Alex returned from his stag do in Scotland in early July and I sensed something had changed. He was more distant again, reluctant to talk and less affectionate. I put it down to nerves: the wedding was only a few weeks away and I knew that for shy people, being the centre of attention could be hard.

Two weeks before the wedding I went to a residential bootcamp aiming to lose a few final pounds before the big day. We kissed goodbye and he texted that he loved me.

Then, four days later, I walked back into our house and was shocked at his cold and distant manner. No kiss or hug hello, no words of missing me. Alex simply took my bags, announced he was tired and went to bed.

I was stunned, anger rising as he refused to tell me what was wrong. He was gone by the time I woke the

---

SECRETS & GUES

Page 41

FLOWER, SIMONE THERB STROUD

Surrounded by love: Katherine, her mother and sisters in Tuscany

My fiancé jilted me with just a week to go

...so I held our three-day wedding in Italy without him – then went on honeymoon with my mum!

next morning, and I spent the day worrying. But I reminded myself he'd acted a little like this before at times of stress, and it had been fine. Surely, he'd open up to me when he got home.

Yet I couldn't shake the horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach.

At 9pm Alex eventually returned, his expression still stormy. 'What's wrong?' I said, hearing my voice wobble. 'I deserve to know.'

Finally, sitting at the kitchen table and refusing to meet my eyes, he said quietly: 'I just feel like we shouldn't get married.'

I truly thought I was about to be sick, nausea fighting with heartbreak as I began to cry. 'But we're getting married next week,' I

managed to say, as he still refused to look at me. Finally came a flood of anger. 'Why the hell didn't you tell me this before?' I demanded, voice rising with fury. 'How dare you put me through this.'

Trying desperately to get a grip on this nightmare I shot one question after the other at him, but his only reply was that he'd been unhappy since December.

I thought for a moment about begging him, knowing I could change his mind if I tried. But I also knew I'd never forget what he'd said that night – and that I could never marry a man who could do this to me. Despite the rollercoaster of emotions, I knew one thing for sure. Groom or no

groom, I was going to Italy. The venue was paid in full, the guests had all booked their flights. We wouldn't get a penny of our deposits back. So this event was happening, with or without him.

After a night of fitful sleep, I drove myself to the bridal shop for my final dress fitting, sobbing all the way there. Seeing myself in the gown that had made me feel so beautiful just a few months before was unbearable.

Afterwards, I met my mum and sister. Through my tears, I told them I was determined to go ahead with the party, but I only wanted my 30 friends and family there, as I just couldn't face having the reminder of Alex that would

come from seeing his guests. If they thought I was mad they didn't show it, instead telling me what a brilliant idea it was.

Everything became a blur as they leapt into action. They called all the guests, including Alex's family and friends, so that I didn't have to hear their reactions.

Time only passed thanks to wine. Mum staying with me in the day and my friends coming over at night. They told me they thought Alex was never good enough for me. Were they lying? I don't know, but I hugely appreciated their love and support.

Unable to bear Alex being in the house, he moved into our converted garage. I confronted

Defiant: Katherine in her second casual wedding dress

him again, calling him a coward, and he apologized endlessly.

But I realised it wasn't getting me anywhere. I was exhausted, heartbroken and furious, but I had a wedding day to get to.

I knew I couldn't face collecting my main gown, despite the cost. But I packed the second, more casual dress I'd planned to change into after the ceremony, along with my white party jumpsuit, the robe I'd bought for my wedding morning and white swimsuit for the pool party.

'This is not all going to waste because of him,' I thought fiercely. 'I can still wear white.'

But I took off my engagement ring; no way was I wearing that another minute.

My bravado lasted until I arrived at the venue on July 29, where I broke down. Despite my tears, looking out at the perfect Tuscan view I told myself, 'I'd rather be here than back at home sobbing in bed. I'm going to make the most of every minute.'

So, I hugged my amazing friends and family and asked them all. 'Please don't talk to me about what's happened. Just do what you can to make me laugh.' And they did. For three days we ate,

'DO WHAT YOU CAN TO MAKE ME LAUGH'

drank and danced. From the delicious welcome meal and the lovely speeches and toasts at the reception, to the brilliant pool party, everything was exactly as I'd planned it – minus the ceremony and groom.

The hardest moment came when it was all over and everyone left. I cried all day, a mixture of sadness and relief. Then I wiped my eyes and began what should have been my honeymoon along the Amalfi Coast – only with my mum instead of my husband.

I knew that people back home would be talking about what happened, but I refused to be ashamed about being jilted. I'd done nothing wrong, so why should I hide away?

So to address the gossip head on, I decided to post a TikTok video about it.

I'd only expected people I knew to see it, but I was amazed by the response. Within hours, my follower count was into the thousands and messages began pouring in. Women told me how they'd also been jilted and suffered terribly with the shame, how happy they were I was speaking openly about it.

Within five days I had more than 75,000 followers. I'm so glad my experience has touched a chord for so many women, and I hope to inspire others who are jilted to reclaim their wedding experience.

I honestly don't know what's going to happen in the months to come, how Alex and I will disentangle our lives or what it will be like beginning a new chapter aged 36.

But I'm so thankful we didn't get married. My solo wedding has proved to me I'm strong enough to do anything alone.

■ ALEX'S name has been changed. Follow Katherine on TikTok at @kathjay49

As told to KATE GRAHAM

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Page 42

It's Friday! MUSIC

These Brits may shun the limelight but their soul music is Jazzling

by Adrian Thrills

JUNGLE: Sunshine (Calola)

Verdict: Dreamy summer sounds ★★★★☆

THE roll call of acts crowned the country's best band at the BRITs is a Who's Who of classic rock and

pop. From The Beatles to Oasis, Dire Straits to Little Mix, there's no shortage of household names on the list. And then there

is homegrown soul act Jungle, who pipped previous recipients Blur to win in 2024.

Formed in London in 2013 by childhood friends Josh Lloyd-Watson, aka J Lloyd, and Tom McFarland, they are a relatively anonymous bunch who could walk down any high street without being recognised. Preferring to let their music do the talking, they shun the limelight and don't put their photos on album sleeves.

That began to change with their surprise 2024 triumph, and will surely gather pace with their fifth album, Sunshine. Long-term collaborator Lydia Kitto, who has worked with Jungle since 2021, is now a full-time member. Dazzling when she appeared with them at the BRITs, she brings emotional heft and a proper focal point.

Beyond that, the trio have delivered an album tailor-made for our seemingly endless summer. Built around luxuriant harmonies, keyboards and guitars, Sunshine is a dreamy blend of soul, disco, rap and Brazilian bossa nova. Its optimism is tinged with melancholy, but there's always the hope that better days lie ahead.

The first voice you hear, on opener Come Back To Me, is that of Kitto. The song is a soulful, shuffling introduction that finds the lovestruck frontwoman giddy, but reflective, as she contemplates a budding romance. 'I've been dreaming of living my life with

Sunny: Jungle's McFarland, Kitto and Lloyd-Watson

you,' she sings. 'I don't wanna wake up 'til I'm right next to you.' The title track evokes a balmy city park, before we hit the beach on The Wave, a Brazilian-flavoured song that transports us to Rio with its sultry Latin grooves, even as the earlier love affair fades. 'Don't you say it's over, when it all falls apart,' sings Lydia. 'You know it gets easier, if we just hold on.'

Slide guitar adds a Hawaiian edge to Where Are You Now?, with Lloyd and McFarland on falsetto vocals, and there's a detour into disco on Someday, Somewhere. French-born rapper Bas supplies bite on Romeo II, the sequel to Romeo, from 2021's Loving In Stereo, on which he also appeared.

Otherwise, it's Lydia who takes centre stage – a pure voice, and an antidote to Auto-Tuned pop. Cool and understated, Sunshine shows Jungle's growing confidence. Jungle start their UK tour at First Direct Bank Arena, Leeds, on November 21 (ticketmaster.co.uk).

MUSIC2YOU PROUDLY PRESENTS

This new collection contains 66 of the biggest hits of the 60s and 70s, opening with Glen Campbell's acclaimed hit Wichita Lineman and chart-toppers from Chicago, The Walker Brothers and Bobbie Gentry. We have Harry Nilsson with Everybody's Talkin, Captain & Tennille with Love Will Keep Us Together plus some of the finest female voices ever to enter a recording studio, with Dusty Springfield, Shirley Bassey, Mama Cass and Dionne Warwick. Disc 2 kicks off with Easy from the Commodores

• 1 Disc one
• 1 Glen Campbell – Wichita Lineman
• 2 Harry Nilsson – Everybody's Talkin'
• 3 Bread – Make It with You
• 4 Chicago – If You Leave Me Now
• 5 20cc – The Things We Do for Love
• 6 Alessi Brothers – Oh Lori
• 7 Andrew Gold – Never Let You Slip Away
• 8 Captain & Tennille – Love Will Keep Us Together
• 9 Helen Reddy – Angie Baby
• 10 Dusty Springfield – The Windmills of Your Mind
• 11 Judy Collins – Send in the Clowns
• 12 Rita Coolidge – We're All Alone
• 13 Elke Brooks – Don't Cry Out Loud
• 14 Gladys Knight & The Pops – Try to Remember/The Way We Were
• 15 Shirley Bassey – Something
• 16 Andy Williams – (Where Do I Begin) Love Story
• 17 Mama Cass – Dream a Little Dream of Me

• 18 The Walker Brothers – Make It Easy on Yourself

• 19 Jackie DeShannon – What the World Needs Now is Love

• 20 Bobbie Gentry – I'll Never Fall in Love Again
• 21 Dionne Warwick – This Girl's in Love with You
• 22 Acker Bills – Stranger on the Shore
• 23 Disc two
• 1 Commodores – Easy
• 2 Rose Royce – Love Don't Live Here Anymore
• 3 The Three Degrees – Woman in Love
• 4 Aretha Franklin – Until You Come Back to Me (That's What I'm Gonna Do)
• 5 Cilla Black – Anyone Who Had a Heart
• 6 Lesley Gore – Misty
• 7 Engelbert Humperdinck – The Last Waltz
• 8 Al Martino – Spanish Eyes
• 9 Matt Monro – Born Free
• 10 Tony Bennett – The Good Life
• 11 Jack Jones – Wives and Lovers
• 12 The Johnny Mann Singers – Up Up and Away

and Love Don't Live Here Anymore from Rose Royce, along with hits from Three Degrees, The New Seekers, Aretha Franklin, Cilla Black and Matt Monro, plus Tony Bennett singing The Good Life.

Disc 3 begins with Theme from 'A Summer Place' followed by hits from Crystal Gayle, Barry Manilow and Tom Jones, plus Demis Roussos with his number one Forever and Ever, along with soul ballads from Brook Benton and Danny Williams... and the truly sensational She performed by Charles Aznavour.

• 13 Christie – Yellow River
• 14 The New Seekers – I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing (In Perfect Harmony)
• 15 Dawn & Tony Orlando – Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Ole Oak Tree
• 16 Carole Bayer Sager – You're Moving out Today
• 17 Peter Shelley – Love Me, Love My Dog
• 18 Dana – Please Tell Him That I Said Hello
• 19 Jacky – White Horses
• 20 Sammy Davis Jr. – The Candy Man
• 21 George Baker Selection – Pyloma Blanco
• 22 Scott Fitzgerald & Yvonne Keely – (I Had More)
• 23 Disc three
• 1 Percy Faith & His Orchestra – Theme from 'A Summer Place'
• 2 Bobby Goldshorn – Honey
• 3 Charlie Rich – The Most Beautiful Girl
• 4 Crystal Gayle – Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Rise

• 5 Eric Carmen – All By Myself

• 6 Barry Manilow – 'Pyin' to Get the Feeling Again

• 7 Tom Jones – She's A Lady
• 8 Demis Roussos – Forever & Ever
• 9 Ben E. King – Spanish Harlem
• 10 Johnny Mathis & Ray Conniff & His Orchestra & Chorus – Wonderful Wonderful
• 11 Doris Day – Move Over Darling
• 12 Netty Lester – Love Letters
• 13 Mary Mason – Angel of the Morning/ Any Way That You Want Me
• 14 Liverpool Express – Every Man Must Have A Dream
• 15 Neil Sedake – Laughter in the Rain
• 16 Frankie Valli – My Eyes Adored You
• 17 George Benson – The Greatest Love of All
• 18 Brook Benton – Rainy Night in Georgia
• 19 Danny Williams – Moon River
• 20 Perry Como – And I Love You So
• 21 Charles Aznavour – (You/You Les Shuges De L'amour)
• 22 James Galway – Annie's Song

Readers can order a copy of this wonderful 66-track three-CD collection for just £9.99 including p&p, either for yourself or as a gift for a friend or loved one, by visiting music2you.co.uk/easy. To see the full range of our popular CDs, DVDs, audiobooks and books, visit music2you.co.uk

MUSIC2YOU

Buy now at music2you.co.uk/easy

BEST OF THE NEW RELEASES...

in Role Model, New England singer Tucker Pillsbury adopts a second as hapless Chuck

ROLE MODEL: Chuck Timely & The Hourglass (Interscope) Having given us one after ego

Timely on this concept album of dusty Americana. He's an evocative writer, singing of the trials of an L.A. singleton on High Hopes 3000 before seeking solace at the bar on Song Is All You Get. Girlfriend Dakota Johnson guests on ballad Love I You. ★★★★☆

and daughters of Cecil and Linda (of Womack & Womack), the sisters have impeccable

THE WOMACK SISTERS: The Womack Sisters (Daptone) As the nieces of Bobby Womack

soul credentials, and they carry the torch with finesse. Looking to classic R&B and 1960s New York girl groups, their music is built around harmonies. Chauffeur recalls their days as Uber drivers. My Sisters And Me explores their gospel roots. ★★★☆☆ AT

the trumpet almost seems to play itself. Thing Helseth and the Bergen Philharmonic,

under Petr Popelka, give us Alexander Aruthanian's 1950 Trumpet Concerto and fine Theme And Variations. Sparky concertos from Krzysztof Penderecki and Mieczysław Weinberg finish an enticing programme for trumpet fans. ★★★★☆ TULLY POTTER

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It's Friday! FILM

Page 43

by Brian Viner

The End Of Oak Street (12A, 99 mins)

Verdict: Jurassic link ★★★☆☆

Tony (15, 106 mins)

Verdict: A bit undercooked ★★★☆☆

ANYONE who goes to see The End Of Oak Street expecting a sci-fi survivalist thriller, which is how it is billed, runs the considerable risk of walking out disappointed.

Treat it as a comedy, however, and you might be satisfied. It is frequently, and not always intentionally, hilarious.

The frankly bonkers story takes place in 1982 and is set in the kind of provincial suburbia that Steven Spielberg used in ET (which coincidentally, or maybe not, was released in... 1982).

Anne Hathaway and Ewan McGregor play Denise and Greg Platt, whose marriage is crumbling. In the basement of their Oak Street home, Denise is secretly writing a novel, thinly disguising her frustrations with her somewhat inadequate husband.

Their two children, Audrey (Maisy Stella) and Brian (Christian Convery), are aware of their parents' unhappiness. So what is going to save the marriage and protect the family unit? It couldn't be the double whammy of time-travel and dinosaurs, could it?

Writer-director David Robert Mitchell starts by giving us a familiar depiction of small-town America: marital discord, feuding neighbours, kids on bikes, teenage bullying, all that sort of stuff. But there's a species of palm tree sprouting up that the local librarian somehow happens to know has been extinct for 200 million years, along with a few other hints that something weird is afoot. And what a foot it turns out to be.

Soon, after some kind of cosmic intervention involving dazzling lights, there's a rampaging triceratops in town. The entire neighbourhood appears to have been picked up and plonked in another age, in the middle of a prehistoric rainforest with killer raptors everywhere.

MITCHELL'S credits include It Follows (2014), a modern horror classic, so he knows how to generate spine-tingling tension. Yet all I felt watching The End Of Oak Street was a powerful urge to laugh. The first time we see Greg legging it from a hungry pterodactyl-type creature, which snaps angrily at him... well, I'm afraid I just pictured Rod Hull's Emu.

Anyway, there's lots of running away and hiding from that slavering, scaly monster best known generically as the d'you-think-he-

Time-travel... dinosaurs that invade suburbia ...this is bonkers!

Ewan McGregor and Anne Hathaway are unintentionally hilarious in this sci-fi thriller

saw-us, while McGregor gets to exercise his three or four stock expressions, especially that look of consternation he does so well.

Hathaway is as reliably fine as ever, taking the preposterous narrative in her stride as she skips into full action mode, lovely neck glistening with sweat and sleeveless top showing off her worked-out arms. Mind you, if you'll forgive the spoiler, she never meets a dinosaur that can smudge her mascara.

There are, needless to add, plenty of echoes of another Spielberg film in all this. The difference is that Jurassic Park made some kind of sense. This really doesn't. But if you want something to watch over a family-size carton of popcorn, it should fit the bill.

■ I commend Tony with the same slight caution. It's basically an 'origin story' of the charis-

matic American chef Anthony Bourdain (who tragically hanged himself in 2018).

Matt Johnson's film chronicles the summer of 1975, with 19-year-old Bourdain (Dominic Sessa) escaping his oppressive middle-class home in suburban New Jersey and setting out for lively Cape Cod in pursuit of a girl he fancies.

There, unexpectedly to all but 100 per cent of the audience, he falls in love with cooking instead.

Now, as we all know, three stars is the holy grail for chefs but in movie-rating terms suggests a film to be taken with a pinch of salt. Tony is such a film.

It is adapted from segments of Bourdain's riveting memoir Kitchen Confidential but feels undercooked. While perfectly watchable, and enjoyable in parts, it's rarely as compelling as it could have been. And certain

narrative flaws leave, if not a sour taste exactly, a disappointingly bland one. Still, Sessa (who made his screen debut in the 2023 hit The Holdovers) is excellent as Tony, playing him as a bright, bullish teenager apparently full of swaggering self-belief, yet insecure and impressionable.

We first meet him at college applying for a creative-writing fellowship, which he's convinced he will get, but doesn't. Yet he still claims to be in Cape Cod as a writer, one of a string of lies woven together in the hope of impressing pretty Nancy (nicely played by British actress Emilia Jones, daughter of Aled).

The humdrum reality is a job as a dishwasher at a seafood restaurant run by the unnamed 'Chef', played by Antonio Banderas, where Tony is soon in thrall to an off-the-rails fellow worker, Sal

Where to?: The Platts, top, evade dinos, middle, in The End Of Oak Street. Above: Banderas and Sessa in Tony

(the very good, suddenly ubiquitous, Leo Woodall). A chain of formative experiences end with Tony getting the cooking bug, but if you've read Bourdain's book you'll find this a curiously sanitised version of events, which never evokes the fiery tensions of a restaurant kitchen nearly as well as the hit TV drama The Bear.

Moreover, how come nobody acknowledges Banderas's character is 50 times more handsome than anyone else in town? And why does Chef fall for Tony's claim that he knows what he's doing in the kitchen, when it's clear within five seconds that he doesn't?

Ultimately, the film raises more questions about Bourdain's life than it answers.

Love actually: Bella Ramsey as Ivy in Sunny Dancer

Two bold British offerings... and a Kiwi comedy

MOVIES about children with cancer need to be very well judged if they are not to seem mawkish. To a pretty short list of those that pull it off, such as Me And Earl And The Dying Girl (2015), we can now add Sunny Dancer (15, 106 mins, ★★★☆☆).

Bella Ramsey, best known for Game Of Thrones, is superb as Ivy, a feisty 17-year-old who, in remission from leukaemia, resents being packed off by her parents (James Norton and Jessica Gunning) to a summer camp

ALSO SHOWING

in Scotland for kids who've had cancer. But contrary to her expectations, she makes friends there and falls in love for the first time. A funny, bold, irreverent, moving film.

Lady (15, 97 mins, ★★★☆☆) is another distinctly British picture, a 'mockumentary' not so much led as swamped by Sian Clifford as 'aristocracy's answer to the Kardashians'.

She's Lady Isabella, a narcissist who throws open the doors of her stately home to a camera crew. It's sometimes very funny, but Clifford's tour de force gets a little wearing.

Holy Days (12A, 101 mins, ★★☆☆☆) is an uneven comedy set in New Zealand about a grieving boy (Elijah Tamati) taken under the wing of three nuns (played by Miriam Margolyes, Judy Davis and Jacki Weaver). Sweet, but flawed.

All films reviewed are in cinemas now.

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Page 44

It's Friday! THEATRE

by Georgina Brown

How The Other Half Loves (Old Vic, London)

Verdict: A class act

★★★★☆

Cats (Open Air Theatre, Regent's Park)

Verdict: Practically purifect

★★★★☆

ALAN AYCKBOURN'S ingenious 1969 comedy How The Other Half Loves is a theatrical marvel. While much of the comic business depends on landlines, class snobbery and frustrated wives chained to the sink, this farcical but forensic dissection of three miserable marriages has a timeless capacity to amuse.

Thanks, in Philip Breen's fluent but far from flawless revival, to Roger Allam.

Wearing a white vest tucked into patterned Y-fronts, his double-chin wobbling like blancmange, umming and erring, hopelessly and hilariously inept, he oozes pomposity as Frank while always getting the wrong end of the stick. 'Not much gets past me,' he boasts, as absolutely everything does. His wife, Fiona, has come home at 2am, forgetting their wedding anniversary. Meanwhile, on the same set, but in a different house, her lover Bob (Rowan Polonski) is bullying his bored wife Terry (a feisty Ayesha Antoine).

Breen's overlong production takes its time, climaxing when the two couples invite the Featherstones, used as scapegoats for the affair, to dinner on consecutive nights which overlap simultaneously at the same table.

Mary and William Featherstone swivel dizzily on their dining chairs. Fiona serves avocado, Terry slops out packet soup—which finishes up all over William.

What's missing is the truthful emotional subtext that underpins and powers Ayckbourn's superbly orchestrated chaos. There's not a whiff of attraction between Dorothy Atkinson's unflappable Fiona and Rowan Polonski's cocky, brutish Bob.

Laura Elsworthy's catatonically

Roger Allam's cuckold is in a comedy class of his own

shy, mousely Mary is an implausible caricature. As is Adam Gillen's clenched, controlling and cruel William. Desperate for a wee, he writhes with physical discomfort without suggesting for one second what he is really feeling: agonised embarrassment at having to say the word 'toilet' to his much posher boss Frank (who refers to loo paper as 'bathroom stationery').

Roger Allam's blissful study in blind befuddlement alone is in a comedy class of its own.

■ FOLLOWING the success of Relatively Speaking, How the Other Half Loves was proof that Ayckbourn was not a one-hit wonder. Similarly, Jesus Christ Superstar put Andrew Lloyd Webber on the musical map... and then he smashed it with Cats in 1981.

For decades, that unmistakable poster - yellow eyes on a black background - flashed from the sides of London buses.

Where better but the outdoors for the first new staging of this cat-tastic, dream-like musical?

Acting ace: Allam as Frank, right, and the Cats cast, left

Gone are the faux-fur and leg-warmers of old. Director and choreographer Drew McOnie has poured his felines into body-stockings, some sleek, others moggy, all with unappealing skinny, rat-like tails.

Based on TS Eliot's Old Possum's Book Of Practical Cats, this ridiculous, plotless hairball of a show is more of a catalogue of characters, with their contrasting dance styles - and Lloyd Webber's wonderful mix of jazz, rock, funk and bouncy music hall melodies - expressing their various personalities.

As these creatures of the city come out at night to crouch, slink, stalk, prowl, lope and leap by the light of a huge moon of rusted steel, there's much to delight. So much so that a critical clawing for what it's not seems

inappropriately catty. While Gary Wilmot's theatre cat Gus, an old windbag, is upstaged by his patchwork coat, Rachel Wooding's faded glamour-puss Grizzbella lights up Memory-lane with her belting voice.

Loudest catcalls for Danny Nat-tras's Mungojerrie and his cat-burgling partner in crime Rumpleteazer (Briana Craig). And Jet Yau's glittering, silver and black street-dancing Mr Mistoffelees, as magic as only a magician can be, swivelling on his head and spraying showers of sequins. And Jaydon Vijn's cocky Jagger-like alley cat, Rum Tum Tugger. A rapturous audience, some in leopard-print and cat-eared hairbands, lapped it up.

Both shows run until September 19. Cats starts a UK and Ireland tour in Plymouth on October 6.

A mesmerising trial and other festival highlights

ONCE the scrappy offshoot of the Edinburgh International Festival, the Fringe has, over the years, grown like Topsy to completely overshadow its parent. So it's nice to be able to sing the praises of something at the EIP for a change.

Wagner Moura, best known for Narcos and The Secret Agent, brought A Trial - After An Enemy Of The People (Lyceum, ★★★☆☆), his modern-day Portuguese-language version of Ibsen's play, which he co-created and stars in, to the festival.

It's set in a Brazilian spa town where Moura, the local doctor, warns the water is contaminated by industrial waste. He is put on trial for endangering the town's prosperity by his brother, the mayor (Danilo Grangheia).

Much of it, particularly the brothers' impassioned exchanges, felt one-note. Moura, however, was mesmerising, and almost made one forget the show's bladder-bursting two-and-a-half-hour running time - without an interval. Almost.

■ A TRIAL of a different sort inspired Amanda Knox: Cartwheel (Gilded Balloon, ★☆☆☆), in which the American talks about her life before and after being twice convicted and acquitted of the murder of

EDINBURGH PICKS

her British flatmate Meredith Kercher in Italy in 2007. It's her story, and she has a right to tell it, but Knox was poorly advised to put this show in the Comedy section. The subject is not funny, she's not funny - and the script is definitely not funny.

■ A MASTERCLASS on how to turn tragedy into comedy is given by Frankie McNair, an Australian making her Fringe debut with Huge Ass Mindset (Gilded Balloon, ★★★★☆), She tells an extraordinary tale of being a child sex abuse survivor, and more recently, getting sober.

It's truly shocking. But somehow the ebullient McNair packs in a stream of hooting gags as she describes her journey (still ongoing) to recovery - and there's an astonishing rug pull in the final section.

The show is moving to Soho Theatre in London next month; catch it if you can.

■ CHRIS Cantrill: Rewilding (Monkey Barrel, ★★★★☆) is, funnyman Cantrill insists, 'not a political show'. Instead, the

smiley, bespectacled, self-deprecating comedian, part of the writing team of the successful debut run of SNL UK, tells us about his life in a Northumbrian village.

At first it seems a bucolic tale. But then a shocking event occurs. What Cantrill describes may or may not have happened, but the show is utterly daft and engaging, and you will definitely leave smiling.

■ AMONG the Traverse Theatre's mixed bag of premieres, For Dolores (★★★★☆) stands out. It's a two-hander written by Irish playwright Eva O'Connor and directed by Jim Culleton.

Working-class Glaswegian Mo (Catriona Faint) and middle-class Irishwoman Realtin (Lara McDonnell) had an intense relationship at university. A few years on, they are sitting in a therapist's office squabbling... over what, exactly, only gradually emerges.

It's melodramatic in parts, but this is a sharply witty study of love, loss and friendship, with two terrific performances. The Edinburgh International Festival runs until August 30 (eif.co.uk), the Fringe till August 31 (edfringe.com).

VERONICA LEE

Impassioned: Wagner Moura in A Trial - After An Enemy of The People

Pictures: MANUEL HARLAN/MARK SENIOR/CAD/LORD

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xx

Page 45

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Page 46

FRIDAY

SPRING 46BC and Rome is having a spectacular triumph for its great military hero, Julius Caesar. Four triumphs rolled into one, in fact: for Caesar has just defeated Vercingetorix in Gaul, conquered Egypt, the kingdom of Pontus (in modern-day Turkey), and Numidia, north Africa, resulting in the death of its king, Juba I.

In the procession of captives is a boy, little more than a toddler in fact, so young that he had to be carried.

He is Juba II of Numidia, son of a dead king.

BOOK OF THE WEEK

REX JUBA: 15 GLIMPSES OF AN AFRICAN KING by Andrew Kenrick (Torva £25, 320pp)

CHRISTOPHER HART

A dramatic beginning, yet Juba would prove a canny survivor, and live on until the ripe old age of 72.

He was also a supreme scholar and writer. Why haven't we heard of him? Alas, the blunt truth is that many details of his life are

obscure, which is why this fascinating portrait of a 'lost king' often reads something like a detective story. And the author is very honest with his subtitle - he offers us only 15 'glimpses' of Juba as he moves through these tumultuous times, among far bigger characters.

Juba spent his boyhood in Rome, common for the children of its defeated enemies, where, along with many other royal children, he was given an impeccable upper-class Roman education.

Soon enough, they were joined by a little girl called Cleopatra Selene, her parents being Cleopatra and Mark Antony, now both dead by suicide after their defeat at the titanic naval Battle of Actium. In time

these two orphans, Juba and Selene, were married, which seems very sweet and clues suggest a happy union.

Meanwhile, would Juba have in fact seen himself as Roman, or African? The author warns against imposing neat or modernised definitions. It can just confuse things, like calling Cleopatra Egyptian, when she was in fact Greek.

He warns astutely that 'in trying to find traces of his African ancestry we risk constructing an identity for Juba that he would not himself have recognised'.

'Romano-Berber-African' is perhaps the safest we can say - but one who also spoke Greek.

Gone Tomorrow

by Lee Child

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THERE were battles, dynastic manoeuvrings, assassinations (of Julius Caesar himself, most famously, in 44BC) and through it all, King Juba II, albeit as a careful and obedient 'client king' of Rome, pursued his other great interest: scholarship, and especially history, geography and exploration.

With an immense intellectual curiosity about the world around him, Juba wrote books with titles such as Roman History, On Theatre, Libyka (a geographical and historical survey of the whole of North Africa from the Atlantic to the Red Sea), On Arabia, On Painters, and so on.

He wrote another called On Resemblances, a book of early linguistics, tracing the marked similarities between words in Latin and Greek. He even wrote a book called On Euphorbion: yes, a little treatise on euphorbia plants. Keen on botany too, evidently.

And alas, here too we are restricted

Scholarly: Juba II wrote books to satisfy his curiosity for the world

to glimpses, for not a single one of his many books has survived. There is nothing sinister here, he wasn't deliberately erased, it's just that vast swathes of ancient literature have been lost.

Books were expensive, rare and fragile, library fires were alarmingly frequent, and then came the Fall of Rome and the Dark Ages... It's a miracle any of the literature of Greece and Rome came down to us at all.

With The Odyssey currently

Sex, golf carts

ONE morning in June 2007, an Iraqi doctor and an engineer from Saudi Arabia drove a Jeep loaded with propane gas through the glass doors of Glasgow Airport's departure lounge and straight into a huge concrete pillar...

Halted but undeterred, one threw petrol bombs into the crowd while the other doused himself in fuel and set it alight.

But the delay caused by the pillar allowed both the police and the public to react. This 'unremarkable intervention that cost almost nothing to make' meant that only five members of the public were injured, rather than hundreds who might have been killed.

This is just one of the many examples of architecture mitigating crisis in journalist Gabriella Bennett's

SOCIETY

HOW TO BUILD A CITY

by Gabriella Bennett

(Headline Press £25, 336pp)

KATHARINE SPURRIER

fantastic book. In her lyrically readable yet highly informative way, Bennett takes us on a two-year journey around the world, stopping at places of great beauty, loneliness and convenience.

She begins in Glenrothes, Scotland, a purpose-built post-war new town where the art of David Harding and the architecture of community helped forge a neighbourhood for the miners employed by the Fife Coal Company.

We then discover the underground city carved out beneath Helsinki. Originally built during the Cold War, the expanse now houses shopping centres, swimming pools, go-kart

---

v1

Page 47

BOOKS

African boy prisoner who became a Ruman king

Long forgotten, Rex Juba II was Julius Caesar's captive who married Cleopatra's daughter, became a legendary scholar – and named the Canary Islands!

showing in cinemas, we can be grateful we still have Homer's two incomparable masterpieces, The Iliad and The Odyssey, but we have also lost his 'epic comedy', the Margites.

Our glimpses of Juba's writings come from numerous quotations and references of other ancient writers, such as Pliny the Elder, Plutarch and fitrabo.

One fun fact that emerges is that Juba named the newly discovered islands in the

Atlantic 'the Canaries', i.e. The Island of the Dogs, due to its population of mutts. He wrote about these new-found lands with great enthusiasm, describing a temple carved from a single block of stone on Puerteventura, and the great lizards of Gomera. He lived his scholarly life with his wife Selene, in his elegant capital on the Mediterranean coast, at Loi, renamed by him to Caesarea (to keep in with the ruling family across the water,

very wise). It was a regal seat on a plateau, commanding fine views, with a royal palace, temples, a lighthouse, all built of finest Carrara marble imported from Italy, and lavishly decorated with fine statuary.

He even survived the rebellion of a ferocious bandit chieftain called Tacfarinas, who caused everybody no end of trouble.

Very little remains of Juba's capital today (now the town of Cherchell, Algeria), much like

his books, leaving us with an abiding, rather haunting sense of a very likeable figure from those times, whom we can indeed only see now in glimpses.

To cap it all, his son Ptolemy would end up being executed by the deranged Emperor Caligula, and Juba's dynasty was ended for ever.

Tempus edax rerum indeed, in the words of another great classical writer, Ovid: Time, the devourer of all things.

and the city of the future ...

In the club: Golf carts in The Villages

tracks and almost a million beds ready to be set up within 24 hours of a Russian attack.

Much of Bennett's findings relate to the threat of, or destruction caused by, war.

In Ukraine she not only visits the foundational ruins of residents' houses but also the architecture school that is training a new generation to rebuild the country.

In this section she writes vividly of the demolition of cities such as Kyiv and Lviv and the resilience Ukraine's people are showing in the face of Russian brutality.

But there are moments of levity here, too. Bennett veers onto a tangent about The Sims – a life simulation computer game that has sold nearly 200 million copies.

An avid fan herself, Bennett understands the appeal of

building a world and characters that you can control, especially when the world around you might feel uncertain.

It's unexpected, but not entirely surprising, to learn that The Sims was created after game designer Will Wright's home was destroyed in a Californian wildfire.

Equally, the Swedes have come up with an ingenious way of combating the effects of iron ore mining in the mountain on which a town, Kiruna, is built.

As the land breaks up and houses disintegrate, buildings such as Kiruna Kyrka, itself a 672-tonne church, are edged forward less than half a mile per hour on remote-controlled platforms welded to 228 wheels for over two days until they reach a safe enough distance.

This is not a permanent solution, but works well

enough to keep the buildings safe for a few years.

Bennett also challenges herself to spend 24 hours in Tokyo without speaking to another human when a robotic or automated option is available. It's easy as it turns out.

Where this would be impossible, however, is in The Villages, Florida. A huge retirement community, where the preferred mode of transport is the golf cart (their churches have been modified for 'drive-by worship' in the carts), and everyone knows everyone a little too well. Swingers abound and sexually transmitted diseases are said to be rife...

Despite the title, this insightful study is not a 'how to' guide for laying out streets, parks and hospitals. Instead it is a story of resilience, strength and humanity's innate resourcefulness.

WHAT BOOK?

ARVIND ETHAN DAVID Author

... are you reading now?

THREE Bags Full by Leonie Swann, which is the novel that the movie The Sheep Detectives is based on.

It's a murder mystery of a shepherd killed by a spade, told from the point of view of his flock. It manages to be both a great detective novel and a brilliant, funny picture of how absurd humans are when viewed from the sheeps' perspective.

I'm listening to it with my eight-year-old daughter, and she's loving it every bit as much as I am. I can't wait to check out the sequel, Big Bad Wool.

... would you take to a desert island?

IT would need to be something I could read over and over again. One book that has already passed that test is The Complete Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle.

I fell in love with the great detective and his loyal companion Watson when I was about 11, and I don't think a year has passed since that I haven't dipped back into the mysteries, either in print or audiobook.

I love this world so much that I decided to set my first novel, The Great Game, in 1905 London, and have my hero come up against the ageing Sherlock and Watson – as well as the young Winston Churchill. I hope I have done them all justice.

... first gave you the reading bug?

DOUGLAS Adams's The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy. I remember thinking, 'Oh my god, I didn't know books could do this.' It was as if I suddenly had a brilliant supercomputer best friend whispering directly into my brain, making me smarter, cooler and funnier.

I ended up meeting Douglas a few years later and have spent a lot of my life adapting Hitchhikers and the Dirk Gently books into TV, comics and theatre, so I guess he gave me more than the reading bug. He gave me the writing bug, the make-cool-stuff bug and the have-fun-with-your-life bug, too.

... left you cold?

I've been too embarrassed to admit this until now, but I simply don't see the point of Charles Dickens. I know he is a national treasure, helped invent Christmas as we understand it, and that the BBC will be making adaptations of Great Expectations until the end of time – but with the possible exceptions of Oliver Twist and A Christmas Carol, I find Dickens turgid and too clever by half.

■ THE Great Game by Arvind Ethan David (Thomas & Mercer, £6.99) is out now.

---

Page 48

BOOKS FICTION

LITERARY FICTION

CLAIRE ALLFREE

PASSAGE

by Colin Thubron

(Chatto and Windus

£14.99, 144pp)

THUBRON'S latest novel

opens with a scene

worthy of Ian McEwan. A

woman lies awake on an operating table, talking, while a surgeon examines a tumour in her brain that sits there, glistening, among 'a turmoil of pink and crimson colls'.

After the surgery, known as an awake craniotomy, Kathleen and her outish husband Robert go on holiday to the Valley of the Kings in Egypt, accompanied by Robert's brother Alan, who has nursed a terrible unrequited love for Kathleen for decades.

Bearing the fruits of his decades as a travel writer, Thubron's exquisitely formed novella makes plain its themes – mortality, remembrance, the limits of human knowledge – with forensic precision.

Yet as the trio's uneasy triangular relationship works towards its inevitable conclusion, the cumulative effect is unsettling, strange and wondrous, in ways only fiction can achieve.

LIFE OF M

by Rachel Cusk

(Fisher £14.99, 192pp)

CUSK'S publishers must

be rubbing their hands

with glee at the amount

of publicity this book has

already generated – it's rumoured to be loosely based on her apparently close friend, the actor Natalie Portman. (Rumour also has it Portman is unhappy with the result.)

Those expecting some sort of warts-and-all reveal, however, will find the joke is on them: Life Of M is much more interested in the tension between the true self and the proximate version that those in the public eye tend to create.

There are clear nods to Portman's film career (after one film, in which M plays a ballerina, a seasoned dancer tells M she was 'terrible'). But seasoned readers of Cusk won't be surprised to find a tonally formal, largely plotless novel that is deeply preoccupied by our profound contemporary cultural estrangement from reality in all its forms.

WHERE ARE THE KINGS

by Donal Ryan

(Doubleday

£16.99, 224pp)

WHEN Jack is 12, he

discovers his mother's

body floating in the lake.

His father spirals into madness and Jack, who narrates through a prism of heart-pinching adolescent confusion, is sent to live with his grandparents, Aunt Rose, with whom – much to his utter horror – he becomes sexually fixated, and three uncles. One is only two years older than he is.

Set in 1990s Ireland, Ryan's coming-of-age novella has the intimation of epic tragedy – but it's also deeply rooted in domestic life as Jack learns more about the family he was born into and what darker implications its secrets might have for him.

Mainly though, Ryan elevates a story about adolescent grief and sexual awakening with prose of vivid, gleaming buoyancy. Every sentence is a treat.

Courtroom king faces the deadliest test

CLASSIC

CRIME

BARRY TURNER

ENTER CERTAIN MURDERERS

by Sara Woods

(Dean Street Press

£10.99, 209pp)

THOSE familiar with the Antony Maitland mysteries might expect another gripping courtroom drama. But for this episode in the career of a multi-talented advocate, Maitland is more the man of action as he sets out to solve the murder of a notorious blackmailer.

The story opens with an appeal from an actress friend whose lover is the chief suspect. Maitland is keen to help but as his interrogations begin to bear fruit, he is caught up in a criminal conspiracy that puts his own life at risk.

After a slow start, the story builds to a thrilling climax with a touch of James Bond, including a cold-hearted villain you will love to hate.

THE HYMN TUNE MYSTERY

by George A. Birmingham

(Oleander Press

£10.95, 237pp)

SHADES of Anthony Trollope hover over this mystery set in a cathedral close. The

enteebied dean, his officious daughter, an autocratic archdeacon and John Dennis, an impetuous young canon, might all have sprung from the Barchester Chronicles.

But more than church politics disrupts their placid lives. When the cathedral organist, a gifted but hard-drinking musician, is found with his head crushed, the clerical establishment closes ranks to declare an accident.

It has second thoughts when a scrap of paper found in the organ loft is believed to contain a vital clue as to the whereabouts of the loot

from a jewel robbery. With no help from his superiors, Canon Dennis determines to crack the code.

Himself a clergyman, Birmingham had a sharp eye for the absurdities of a cloistered life while testing our wits over a knotty puzzle.

WHY DID SHE DIE

by Joan Coggin

(Galileo £10.99, 224pp)

EVERYBODY in the village pays tribute to the saintly nature of Penelope Stevenson. But there is another side to her. Selfish and vindictive when thwarted,

she threatens the relationship between her doting brother and his pregnant wife. A rejected lover also sees through her veneer of self-pitying sacrifice.

But who would want her dead? This is the question when her body is found, a revolver clean of fingerprints by her side.

Fortunately, the dotty but sharp-minded Lady Lupin is on hand to steer the police away from false trails.

An inventive writer, author of the Lady Lupin mysteries Coggin deserves her place in the Golden Age hall of fame.

DEBUTS

SARA LAWRENCE

THE LEFT-BEHIND CHILD

by Romalyn Ante

(Chatto & Windus

£16.99, 240pp)

YENENG is 11 when her

mother, Rosa, leaves their

family in the Philippines to work as a nurse in the Middle East.

Before Rosa leaves, she tells her daughter to take care of everyone and Neneng takes this to heart, vowing not to fail her mother.

For a long time Neneng doesn't understand why their mother had to abandon her family – she imagines she sees Rosa in crowds and worries about her constantly. Neighbours gossip about Rosa betraying them but Neneng refuses to see it.

As Neneng grows older and it becomes impossible to keep her difficult family together, her heart hardens against Rosa and she vows that her life will be different.

However, forced to build a new life, Neneng realises she is more like Rosa than she thought. I couldn't put it down.

QUEEN MAB

by Emily McBride

(One £14.99, 304pp)

MADELEINE, a promising postgraduate student of Victorian literature, is pregnant but reluctant to tell her supervisors. It's one thing to be excited at home, with her husband Tom, but she fears being judged.

Adopted out of the care system in Canada as a baby, Madeleine also yearns for a better connection with her distant mother but their relationship feels precarious.

When baby Maud arrives, Madeleine's own needs seem irrelevant and she slips into delusion, conflating her own experiences with those of the literary heroines she has studied so intently.

Initially suffering from postnatal depression, Madeleine spirals into what looks like psychosis and neither Tom nor her parents know what to do.

This is beautifully written, full of folklore

and fairies and pleasing literary references. Clever and compelling.

A HEALTHY APPETITE

by Katie Hutttestone

(Dead Ink £10.99, 204pp)

HANNAH is 30 and suffering from terminal cancer. She has been ill for a decade and the disease is now in multiple sites around her body and has

stopped responding to conventional drugs.

Hannah's doctor tells her she is a great candidate for a clinical trial. Her partner, Scott, is desperate for her to sign up. But when she joins, everything changes.

Always vegetarian, Hannah is astonished to find herself craving meat. Whilst Hannah searches for rare steaks she keeps it from Scott, who became vegetarian for her and is now so committed he won't allow meat in their house.

As Hannah's illness recedes she becomes someone she doesn't recognize, hungry for all kinds of things she shouldn't have. I raced through this dark, different story.

CHILDREN'S

SALLY MORRIS

DOGS AND BEARS

by Max Porter

Illustrated by

Dorothee de

Monfreid

(Fisher £7.99, 32pp)

THIS first children's title from award-winning Porter is a brilliant blend of moral message, surreal humour and wildly funny illustrations.

The narrator hates 'brawling' but loves saying the word out loud, immediately encouraging children to join in.

The brawling arises from constant fights between groups of dogs and bears (bears hate the way dogs dress and cook)

until, during one bust-up, tons of squid, sucked up by a storm, fall from the sky.

When the animals band together to return them to the sea, they discover the joy of harmony (well, they still enjoy a bit of rough and tumble). Who is the narrator? Wait until the last page... Witty and wise. Age 3+

INTO THIN AIR

by S. E. Durrant

(Nosy Crow £7.99, 256pp)

SLEVEN-year-old Luna is a maths genius who wants to become an astronaut, while her skateboarding sister, Jade, is more outgoing and popular.

When their science-loving father disappears, Luna is convinced he'll return to watch the International Space Station pass their house in

ten days' time but confesses her doubts to her only friend, Casey.

When threatening men turn up at the house and it's obvious that Dad isn't 'visiting Nan', as their mother claims, the children pool their skills to find him.

With a realistic background of financial insecurity and latch-key kids, this is a gripping mystery and a story of emotional resilience. 8+

TRATORS' NEST

by Frances

Hardinge

(First Ink

£16.99, 448pp)

HARDINGE'S skill

is blending mythology and magic with authentic historical detail and this complex medieval adventure also explores power and who

wields it. In another world, unnamed players move castles around the land like chess pieces but wherever they land, the local villagers must serve them.

When 15-year-old Burr's family suffers a tragedy because of a new overlord, he rebels but then the castle is moved with him and his sisters inside.

Who is the mysterious heiress and what is the significance of the Magpie Maiden? Can they harness the Great Game for good? It's absorbing, thought-provoking and full of twists that will keep fans gripped. 14+

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Page 49

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50 TELEVISION

vi

CRIME DRAMA

The Hairdresser Mysteries, 2pm, BBC1

IT'S Halloween, and Lily (Sally Phillips, pictured) has an appointment at a creepy house whose one elderly resident is kept

company by a menagerie of taxidermy animals -- and, what with all the strange noises from the top floor, perhaps a few ghosts, too. Frances Tomelly and Charlotte Hoge guest star in an episode that's a lot of spooky fun.

TROUBLED DETECTIVE

Bergerac, 9pm, BBC2

JIM'S fixation with pinning Cate's murder on Arthur Wakefield sees him making more mistakes, while his obsession with John Blakley crosses a line, and Chief Supt Dalal might be left with no option but to take him off the case. But without his work to take his mind off his grief, will Jim be able to resist turning back to the bottle?

PICK OF TODAY'S TV

THE ONE SHOW AT 20, 7PM, BBC1

DO you remember when The One Show launched, on 14 August, 2006? Back then, Adrian Chiles and Nadia Sawalha were the first presenting duo bringing us its now familiar teatime mix of celebrity chat and moving stories from around the country. Now, after 20 years and more than 4,000 episodes, Alex Jones (pictured) and Roman Kemp welcome former presenters and favourite guests back to the sofa for an extended anniversary special. They'll be looking back at some of the most memorable moments and inspiring stories, including celebrating the show's fundraising legacy with Children In Need, before marking the occasion

with a musical performance. 'I'm looking forward to reminiscing, reminding myself of brilliant moments and having some of the past presenters back with us, alongside the current team,' says Jones. 'When I started, I was younger than Roman is now. And I've done all the big life stuff with our audience -- met my husband, got married, bought the house, had the children... so I feel like I've grown up on the show.' One moment we hope they will show again is the time when host Matt Baker unexpectedly asked David Cameron: 'How on earth do you sleep at night?' The look on the then prime minister's face is priceless.

BBC1

6.00 Breakfast

9.30 Animal Park (AD,R)

10.00 Trace, Track, Get My Car Back (R) A Ferrari owner is shocked to see CCTV footage of his car being stolen by machete-wielding crooks.

10.30 European Athletics

Championships: Birmingham 2026 Coverage of the opening session on day five.

1.15 BBC News at One; Weather

1.40 BBC Regional News; Weather

1.50 BBC News at One; Weather

2.00 The Hairdresser Mysteries (AD)

PKX Halloween arrives in Blossom Vale along with a crime wave.

2.45 Escape to the Country (AD,R)

Sonali Shah helps a couple to find a new home in Argyll and Bute.

3.30 The Repair Shop (AD,R) The

experts restore a dress, a drum, a clocking-in clock and a polo bike.

4.30 The Answer Run Quiz show, hosted by Jason Manford.

5.15 Pointless (R) Quiz, hosted by Alexander Armstrong.

6.00 BBC News at Six; Weather

6.30 BBC Regional News; Weather

7.00 The One Show at 20 Alex Jones PKX and Roman Kemp present an extended edition bringing together some of the biggest names, favourite stories and standout moments from the past 20 years of the show.

8.00 European Athletics

Championships: Birmingham

2026 Gabby Logan presents further coverage of the evening session on day five from Alexander Stadium, including the men's 200m and women's 800m finals. With analysis from Jessica Ennis-Hill and Greg Rutherford, and commentary by Steve Cram, Steve Backley, Andrew Cotter, Colin Jackson and Paula Radcliffe.

10.00 BBC News at Ten

10.30 BBC Regional News

(Followed by Weather)

10.40 Ann Droid (AD) Linda persuades

PKX Sue to go camping to see a meteor storm under clear skies.

11.10 Mothers' Instinct (2024) (15) ♦

RLL Premiere. Drama, with Anne Hathaway and Jessica Chastain.

12.40 Weather for the Week Ahead

12.45 BBC News

BBC2

6.30 The Answer Run (R)

7.15 Money for Nothing (R)

8.00 Marcus Wareing Simply

Provence (BSL,R)

9.00 BBC News

10.30 Antiques Road Trip (R)

11.15 Homes Under the Hammer (R)

12.15 Bargain Hunt (AD,R)

1.00 Richard Osman's House of Games

(R) Mehreen Baig, Clare Balding,

Jamie Laing and Mike Wozniak take

part in the final challenges.

1.30 The Finish Line (R) Quiz.

2.15 Do You Know Your Place? (R)

2.45 The Great Rift: Africa's Wild

Heart (AD,R) The Great Rift Valley.

3.45 The Great Rift: Africa's Wild

Heart (AD,R) Last in series.

4.35 Vintage Antiques Roadshow (R)

The team returns to Renishaw Hall.

5.15 Flog It! (R) From Basingstoke.

6.00 Richard Osman's House of Games

(R) Chris Bisson, Danielle Harold,

Katharine Merry and Robert Webb

test their general knowledge.

6.30 Bear Grylls: Wild Reckoning

(AD,R) A couple cannot agree what

type of house they should buy.

7.00 European Athletics

Championships: Birmingham

2026 Coverage of the evening

session on day five from

Alexander Stadium, including

the women's 10,000m final.

Coverage continues on BBC1.

8.00 Gardeners' World As the

drought takes its toll on

Longmeadow, Monty Don takes

stock of his garden and has

a radical re-think of what he

should be growing in the future.

9.00 Bergerac (AD) A revelation

PKX about the night of Cate's murder

changes everything.

9.45 QI XL (R) With Rose Matafeo,

Lou Sanders and Ross Noble.

10.30 Newsnight (Followed

by Weather)

11.05 On Falling (2024) (15) ♦

RLL Premiere. A Portuguese worker

in a Scottish warehouse, comes

to terms with loneliness and

alienation. Drama, starring

Joana Santos and Ines Vaz.

12.45 The Rapture (AD,BSL,R)

1.45 This is BBC2

ITV1

6.00 Good Morning Britain

10.00 This Morning Daily magazine, featuring a mix of celebrity chat, showbusiness news, lifestyle features, topical discussion, health and beauty advice and more.

1.30 News; Weather

1.55 Regional News

2.00 Dickinson's Real Deal (AD,R) David

Dickinson and his dealers set up

stall in Oldham, where Alison

Chapman gets her hands on some

puppets, and Cheryl Hackney falls

for a beautiful brooch.

3.00 Deal or No Deal (AD,R) Stephen

Mullern's hosts as Brian tries to

open the 22 red boxes in the right

order, taking on the infamous

Banker for the chance to win a

cash prize: Regional Weather

4.00 Tipping Point (R) Quiz show,

hosted by Ben Shephard.

5.00 The Chase (R) Bradley Walsh

presents as Sacula, Vicky, Sophy

and Paul work as a team to take

on one of the ruthless Chasers.

6.00 Regional News

6.30 News; Weather

7.30 Abbey Clancy: Celebrity

Homes (R) Abbey visits the

homes of Olivia Bowen and

Emma Thynn.

8.00 Emmerdale (AD) Lewis surprises

kiev with an announcement.

8.30 Coronation Street (AD) Lucy's

presence stirs up conflict.

9.00 Who Wants to Be a

Millionaire? Celebrity Special

(R) Steph McGovern and Dion

Dublin answer questions to win

cash for their chosen charities.

10.00 The Twisted Tale of Amanda

Knox (AD) After four years in

prison for a crime they didn't

commit, Amanda and Raffaele

are free. Drama, starring

Grace Van Patten.

11.00 News (Followed by Weather)

11.35 Regional News

11.50 Inside the Langham: Britain's

First Grand Hotel (AD,R) The

hostelry's MD oversees progress

on the Langham Venice.

12.15 Shop on TV 3.00 Force of Nature

(AD,BSL,R) 3.50 Long Lost Family

(AD,BSL,R) 4.45 Unwind with ITV

CHANNEL 4

6.30 The King of Queens (AD,R)

7.45 Everybody Loves Raymond

(AD,R) Triple bill.

9.10 Frasier (AD,R) Four episodes.

11.10 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares

USA (R) From New Jersey.

12.05 Channel 4 News Summary

12.10 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (AD,R)

1.10 The Great House Giveaway (R)

Two strangers in Kidderminster

buy a property at auction.

2.10 Countdown With Pauline McLynn

in Dictionary Corner.

3.00 A Place in the Sun (R) Ben Hillman

helps Tom from Scotland find the

perfect home on Gran Canaria.

4.00 Saving Country Houses with

Penelope Keith (AD,R) In Dorset,

storms threaten Mapperton

House's annual plant fair.

5.00 Chateau DIY (AD,R) At Chateau

de Sauge, Donna and Paul's suite

renovation is finally complete.

6.00 American Pickers (AD,R) Just

outside Washington DC, Mike and

Frank find a stash of inventory

from one of the US' oldest bicycle

and sporting goods store.

7.00 Channel 4 News

8.00 Surgery Secrets of the Super

Rich (AD) Emma has a C9,500

nano-fat treatment to rejuvenate

her under-eye shadows and

James tackles hair loss head-on

in an eight-hour transplant.

9.00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does

Countdown (R) Jimmy Carr

hosts the comedy words-and-

numbers quiz, with Jon

Richardson and Robin Conaty

taking on new team captain Rob

Beckett and Kiehl Smith-Bynoe.

10.00 Big Fat Quiz: Best Bits There's

quizzing disaster in every form

imaginable, as our cast come

unstuck in some of the finest

moments from the Big Fat Quiz.

11.05 Sarah Millican: Chatterbox

Live (R) Stand-up show

recorded at London's

Bloomsbury Theatre in 2011, in

which the comedienne shares

humorous insights into her life.

12.10 Bill Bailey Live: Part Troll (R)

1.35 Ramsay's Hotel Hell (AD,BSL,R)

2.25 Four in a Bed (R) 4.35 Couples

Come Dine with Me (BSL,R)

5.30 Kirstie's House of Craft (R)

5.40 A Place in the Sun (R)

(R) Repeat. (HD) High Definition. (AD) Audio Description. (b/w) Not in colour. (BSL) British Sign Language.

Family viewing

Generally suitable for all

Caution recommended

---

TELEVISION 51

ROBOTIC COMEDY

Ann Droid, 10.40pm, BBC1

DIANE Morgan's speciality is delivering hilariously inappropriate lines in deadpan style — with her documentary-maker Philomena Cunk, those came from her spectacularly uninformed take on the world, but with her robot Linda, it's uncomfortable truths that supply the laughs. This sitcom manages to seamlessly blend those laughs with genuinely pregnant moments, and there's no shortage of either this week when Linda and Sue (Sue Johnston) go camping, and Linda's brutal honesty does not go down well.

FILM CHOICE

Mothers' Instinct, 11.10pm, BBC1

ANNE Hathaway and Jessica Chastain are the dynamite stars that give this thriller a serious lift. Set amid the white jacket fences of 1960s America, it's the story of the consequences when one of these two neighbours — both mothers — loses a child.

CHANNEL 5

6.00 Milkshake! Peppa Pig (R) 6.05 Peppa Pig (R) 6.10 Tweedy & Flut (R) 6.15 Odo (R) 6.20 Thomas & Friends (R) 6.35 Fireman Sam (R) 6.45 Peppa Pig (R) 6.50 Pip and Pony (R) 7.00 Paw Patrol (R) 7.10 Move It Milkshakers! (R) 7.20 Rubble & Crew 7.35 Peppa Pig (AD,R) 7.40 Peppa Pig (AD,R) 7.45 Tim Rex in Space (AD,R) 8.00 Stan & Gran (R) 8.15 Paw Patrol (R) 8.25 The Adventures of Paddington (R) 8.40 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom (R) 8.50 Kangaroo Beach 9.00 Peppa Pig (AD,R) 9.10 Operation Pavoome (R)

9.15 Jeremy Vine

11.30 Storm & Alexis

12.45 5 News at Lunchtime

12.50 Matt Allevright

2.20 My Husband's Seven Wives

FM (2024) (PG) 9th Thriller; starring Kristi Murdock.

4.00 Castle (R) A dream drives Castle and Beckett to seek answers.

4.55 Love Nature (R) Winter on Islay, Scotland's southernmost inner Hebrides Island.

5.00 5 News with Ban Walker

6.00 Ibiza: Jewel of the Med (R)

6.55 5 News Update

7.00 Tom Read Wilson's Grand Tour (R) Having travelled across the Alps, Tom finds solace in the beauty of Lake Como. Last in series.

7.55 5 News Update

8.00 Alexander Armstrong in Sri Lanka (R) Alexander heads for the paradise isle of the Indian Ocean, exploring its golden sands and culture, beginning in the fortress town of Galle.

9.00 The Big Drought of 1975 (R) A look at a record-breaking spell of erratic weather in the UK that lasted for 16 months from May 1975, culminating in 1976 when thousands of households had to rely on standpipes.

10.30 Piers Morgan: Uncensored Opinion-led news and debate, hosted by Piers Morgan.

12.05 Fare Dodgers: At War with

the Law (R) 1.00 Cruise TV

with LoveltBookit (R) 2.00

Entertainment News on 5

2.10 GPs: Behind Closed Doors (R)

3.00 Castle (R) 3.45 Friends (AD,R)

4.10 Friends (R) 4.35 Cruising

with Susan Calman (AD,BSL,R)

5.25 Entertainment News on 5

▲ Particularly liable to offend

A sculptor, sex workers, a convict cleric... this house has seen it all

NATURAL history used to be the BBC's unchallenged forte. Not any more — the unlimited budgets of Netflix and Disney have enabled streamers to create landmark wildlife series just as spectacular.

But no other broadcaster does human history as well as Auntie. The past decade or so has seen the BBC pioneer an innovative type of investigation into the past, one that engages our emotions as much as our curiosity.

Shows such as Fake Or Fortune? and Who Do You Think You Are? have the appeal of detective mysteries but they're built on meticulous research, with the focus on details in forgotten archives more than dates in dusty textbooks.

Other channels, particularly Channel 5 and Sky History, have attempted to mimic the approach, but it's a type of television that only the BBC has mastered. A House Through Time is an admirable example.

I'd love to know how many addresses the researchers considered before settling on the five-storey house in Calton Hill,

SIZZLING SHADE OF THE WEEK:

Steph McGovern was making a bold statement as she launched The Big Deal (BBC2), an art trading game. With a shocking pink trouser suit and pink nail varnish, even her hair had a pinkish tinge. Only one colour on the palette, Steph?

Edinburgh, for their sixth series. To sustain a narrative across four episodes, there will have to be at least a dozen former inhabitants whose tales are worth exploring, and this building seemed promising from the moment presenter David Olusoga walked through the gate to discover two front doors — one for the ground floor and two upper storeys, and one for the split-level garden apartment.

In the first room he inspected, his eye was drawn to a circular hole sawn into the wooden shutters. The lady who owns half the house, Morag, had a theory about that: perhaps a seafaring chap once lived there, and liked to keep an eye on Leth docks and the Firth of Furth.

Impressionists are out of fashion these days (they're the 'parlabs' of comedy, 'one rung down from ventriloquists', says actress and impressionist Ronni Ancona). That's a pity, because Olusoga is a gift for mimics. His way, of separating, every phrase,

N. IRELAND TV VARIATIONS

BBC1 15.40pm: The Big Deal with Steph McGovern. 11.40 Am Droid. 12.10am FLM: Mothers' Instinct (2024) (PS) 1.40 BBC News. UTV 7.00pm UTV Life. Join Pamela Ballantine for the best of local chat. 7.30 Hidden Northern Ireland. Barbara McClain listen to the rees on a shift, and explore a church, while Rita Fitzgerald visits a store packed with treasure.

WELSH TV VARIATIONS

ITV 7.00pm Coast & Country.

94C 6.00pm Live: Disease News/dition 54C air Tyworld. 12.05 Pyramid Bleed. 12.30 Hero. 1.00 TV (YouTube). 1.30 Sun On. 2.00 News/dition 54C air Tyworld. 2.05 TV (YouTube). 2.55 News/dition 54C air Tyworld. 3.05 TV (TV). 4.00 Sun View. 5.00 Episode. 6.00 Live (All Comms). 6.30 Camden a View. 6.55 News/dition 54C. 7.00 Hero. 7.30 News/dition 54C air Tyworld. 8.00 Mike Ruddson (In-News-Million). 8.55 News/dition 54C air Tyworld. 9.00 Am Droid 10.00 V Oelo. 10.30 Miedig Ry Mowati.

CHRISTOPHER STEVENS

LAST NIGHT'S TV

A House Through Time (BBC2) ★★★★★

and even, each, word, with a pause, can be, wearisome.

The even does it when he's not speaking, with a blink and a nod to punctuate his thoughts. But when we're being given so much information to absorb, this earnest and methodical delivery is

far better than an over-excited rush of words.

We met a clergyman called William Fitzsimmons, who nearly got himself hanged for helping French prisoners of war escape the country after breaking out of the dungeons at Edinburgh castle.

The sculptor Sir John Steell, who created the city's much-loved statues of Walter Scott and the Duke of Wellington, also grew up in the house, one of 11 children. His father was a craftsman who went bankrupt after managing to get himself £7,835 in debt — about two-thirds of a million quid today.

But the really intriguing residents arrive in a future episode. At one time, the house was 'an upmarket brothel'. Perhaps that explains the hole in the shutters...

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52 DIGITAL & ON DEMAND

PICK OF DIGITAL & ON DEMAND TV

HAMNET, 8PM, SKY CINEMA PREMIERE

WILLIAM Shakespeare's wife Anne Hathaway has only a supporting role in the history books but she is the dominant figure in Hamnet, Chloé Zhao's deeply soulful, altogether intoxicating tearjerker about the loss of the couple's 11-year-old son, Hamnet. The film, starring Irish actors Jessie Buckley and Paul Mescal as Anne and William (pictured), is an adaptation of Maggie O'Farrell's acclaimed 2020 novel of the same name although Zhao has clearly put a lot of herself into the film. As for the actors, Buckley's

performance is a proper tour de force. It's hard to unleash so much visceral emotion without overacting but she does so triumphantly and, though she will get the plaudits, Mescal matches her — especially in the moving finale. Overall, the film was nominated for eight Oscars and 11 BAFTA. It took home the BAFTA for Outstanding British Film and Buckley, to no one's surprise, took the Leading Actress gong — a best she repeated at the Oscars, becoming the first Irish woman to win in that category.

FRENCH CRIME DRAMA

Everybody Lies, stream on Channel 4

THIS quirky French crime drama features the kind of detective who ruffles feathers. Vincent Verner (Vincent Elbaz) is a charismatic and forthright inspector who is recruited by tenacious prosecutor Alice Mojodi (Mariana Guyer, pictured, with Elbaz) to work on cases linked to the rich and powerful who expect to get away with murder. Their first case is the death of a young woman with two to a very well-connected businessman. Can the team prove he has blood on his hands?

STAND-UP COMEDY

Frank Skinner: 30 Years Of Dirt, 9pm, Sky One

FRANK Skinner's stand-up show is filmed at the Soho Theatre Walthamstow, which is a nice venue but has an old school feel — it's also shot in black and white

which amplifies that impression, along with gags about the usual age of his audience. You can never pin Skinner down though, and the show isn't so much old as relaxed, a quality born of decades of doing stand-up and dealing with audiences. He's self-deprecating but utterly in charge, warm but cold and capable of taking a line in any direction except the one you expect. It's a masterclass in comedy, with topics ranging from his encounters with the Royal Family to guns about parking in London to complaining how he never gets offered to do anything on TV anymore except documentaries and this, of course.

TIME

BBC 4

E4

ITV2

7.00pm

9 (Scot 24)

13

6

7.30pm

Beethoven's Seventh at the Proms Gustavo Dudamel leads the Los Angeles Philharmonic in its first Proms appearance for more than two decades, pairing Beethoven with Gabriele Ortich urgent Revolution diamantina

The Simpsons Ghouthis Halloween capers

The Floor the competition is heating up with just 57 players left as Rob Brydon beats another round of quick-fire quiz duels

8.00pm

8.35 TOTP: 2000 Gail Porter presents the pop chart programme

The Great Celebrity Bake Off for Stand Up to Cancer Vol Farrah, Michi Hatsuo, Katherine Kelly and Ben Miller bake for charity

The 1% Club Quiz hosted by Lee black in which the questions are about logic and common sense, with 50 contestants having a chance of winning up to £100,000

9.00pm

9.05 TOTP: 2000 Gail Porter presents the pop chart programme

Gogglebox Omnibus of the two-part special for Stand Up to Cancer

John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017,15) When an Italian crime lord holds him to a blood oath, hitman John Wick goes on another murderous rampage. Action sequel, starring Keanu Reeves. Includes FYI Daily

9.30pm

9.35 TOTP: 1985 Music by 50/40 with Christie Hyndle and Kate Bush

American Reunion (2012,15) Old friends attending a high-school reunion make deadness attempts to relive their teens. Comedy sequel to the American Pre movies, with Jason Biggs and Alyson Hannigan (To 12.10)

10.00pm

10.05 TOTP: 1986 With It Bites, Lionel Richie, Phil Fearon and Chris de Burgh

11.25 Family Guy Stewie becomes addicted to 42/40 medication

10.30pm

10.35 Ultimate Cover Versions at the BBC Highlights from 60 years of cover performances, featuring the Moody Blues, Soft Cell and Sinead O'Connor

11.35 Ultimate Cover Versions at the BBC Volume 2 (To 1.35)

11.35 Family Guy Joe's long-entraged father Bud with Quahog (To 12.25)

ENTERTAINMENT & FACTUAL

5ACTION

Freesieve 33 Sky 150

11.45am Gunsmoke 12.50pm FILM Once Upon a Time in the West (1860) (12) 4.00 Highway Thru Hell 5.00 Motorway Copy Catching Britain's Speeders 6.00 Police Interceptors 6.00 Motorway Copy: Catching Britain's Speeders 9.00 Police Interceptors 10.00 Copy 11.00 The X-Files

BBC THREE

Freesieve 32 Sky 125 Virgin 107 7.00pm The Catch Up 7.05 Deadly 60 7.30/12.16 Night at the Museum, Secret of the Tomb (2016) (PG) 9.00 Death in Paradise 10.00 Ghosts Australia 11.15 He Had It Coming

COMEDY CENTRAL

Sky 112 Virgin 133 12noon The Upper Hand 1.05 Friends 9.00 Bradley & Barney Walsh Breaking Dad 9.30 Kevin Bridges The Brand New Tour 11.25 Where Live In It Anyway? USA

DISCOVERY

Sky 135 Virgin 177 11.00am Building Off the Grid 1.00pm Or Jeff Rocky Mountain Vet 3.00 New It's Made 5.00 Alaska: Homestead Rescue 7.00 Gold Rush: Mine Rescue with Freddy & Juan 9.00 Expedition Files 10.00 Mystery at Blind Frog Ranch 11.00 Expedition X

E4 (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 13 Sky 135 Virgin 106 11.00am Below Deck: Mediterranean 12noon The Simpsons 2.00 Brooklyn Nine-Nine 3.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons

SSTAR (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 32 Sky 128 Virgin 136 12noon Traffic Copy 2.00 Police Interceptors 5.00 Shoplifters Caught Bed Involved 6.00 Home and Away

5 SELECT

Freesieve 46 Sky 153 Virgin 138 12noon All Creations Great and Small: Christmas Special 1.10 Murder, Die Wrote 3.00 Columbia 5.05 Domet: Country and Coast 6.00 Educational Engineering 7.00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 9.00 Taggart Feature-length

episode. A killer's family is targeted for death 11.05 The Forgotten Prince: The Mystery of the Duke of Kent

5 USA (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 21 Sky 141 Virgin 120 12noon Live & Only 6.00 NCS

FOOD NETWORK UK

Freesieve 43 Sky 144 Virgin 168 11.00am The Great British Bake Off 1.00pm James Martin's Islands to Highlands 3.00 The Hairy Bikers Go Local 4.00 James's One-Pan Wonders 5.00 The Pioneer Woman 6.00 James Martin's Islands to Highlands 7.00 The Great British Bake Off 9.00 Marcus in the Med Malloca 10.00 Secrets of the Curry Kitchen 10.30 Mameet's Eats 11.00 Diners, Drive-Ins and Gives

GREAT! TV

Freesieve 34 Sky 157 Virgin 170 12noon Little House on the Prairie 1.00 The Waltons 4.00 Little House on the Prairie 6.00 The Irish RM 7.00 HVA'S'R 9.00 FILM, Ghost (1990) (12) 11.00 HVA'S'R

ITV2 (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 4 Sky 118 Virgin 155 10.15am Dawson's Creek 11.10 Chaired 12.10pm Jean or No Deal 1.10 Supermarket Sweep 2.10 The Floor 3.10 The Only Way Is Eases 4.10 The Real Housewives of Potomac 5.00 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills 6.00 Celebrity Carthighouse

ITV3 (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 10 Sky 119 Virgin 117 11.35am Heartbeat 1.35pm Midsummer Murders 3.35 Classic Emmenidas 4.40 Classic Coronation Street 5.50 Heartbeat

ITV4 (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 26 Sky 120 Virgin 118 8.00am Live World Series of Darts, The Auckland Masters: Coverage of day one from Spark Arena in New Zealand, featuring the first-round matches 12noon Dramatic Finishes 12.10 Magnum, PI 3.15 Bees 4.15 The Professionals 5.25 British Touring Car Championship Highlights: Action from Kirockhill 6.55 Sharpe Munro orders Sharpe to kill a French colonel

MORE4 (DAYTIME)

Freesieve 18 Sky 136 Virgin 147 12.40pm Come Dine with Me 3.30 Four in a Bed 5.50 Car S.O.S.

NAT'L GEOGRAPHIC

Sky 123 Virgin 183

11.00am Car G.O.S. 12noon Ultimate Airport Dubai 1.00 Air Crash Investigation 2.00 Erased WWII Heroes of Colour 4.00 Lost Treasures of Egypt 5.00 Battle for the Black Swan: Drain the Oceans 6.00 Planes that Changed History 7.00 Air Crash Investigation 10.00 Construction Falls 11.00 Air Crash Investigation

PBS AMERICA

Freesieve 84 Sky 173 Virgin 187 11.50am Fall of Japan in Colour 1.00pm Weathered Earth's Extremes 1.35 Dugging Up Britain's Past 2.35 The Real Truth 3.40 Battle of Okinawa in Colour 4.50 Fall of Japan in Colour 5.50 Dugging Up Britain's Past 6.50 The Real Truth 7.55 Battle of Okinawa in Colour 9.00 Fall of Japan in Colour 10.00 The Real Truth 11.10 Weathered Earth's Extremes

REALLY

Freesieve 44 Sky 142 Virgin 185 12noon The Yorkshire Auction House 2.00 The Repair Shop 3.00 Salvage Flowers 5.00 Who Do You Think You Are? 6.00 The Repair Shop 7.00 The Yorkshire Auction House 8.00 Antiques Road Trip 9.00 My Lottery Dream Home 10.00 Help! I Wrecked My House 11.00 Help! My House Is Haunted

SKY ARTS

Freesieve 36 Sky 122 Virgin 123 12noon FILM, Seven Dads Mystery (1981) (12) 2.30 Tales of the Unexpected 3.00 The Eighties 4.00 Discovering Janet Leigh 5.00 Portrait Artist of the Year 2/22 6.00 Tales of the Unexpected 7.00 Alfred Hitchcock Presents 8.00 Guy Carney From the Vasilis 9.00 The Thousands and One Musical Lives of Fleetwood Mac 10.15 Classic Albums 11.35 Fleetwood Mac: Live in Boston

SKY ATLANTIC

Sky 108 Virgin 111 10.15am House of the Dragon 12.35pm Homicide: Life on the

RADIO

RADIO 4

FM: 92.4/94.5/95/02

5.00am News Summary. 5.04 The Briefing Room. 5.32 Weather. 5.34 Shipping Forecast. 5.43 Prayer for the Day. 5.45 Farming Today. 6.00 Today. 9.00 Desert Island Discs. With the neurologist Professor Dame Pamela Shaw.

11.00 Woman's Hour. 11.00 The Food Programme. 11.45 Book of the Week: Hiroshima, 8.15: The Lost Memoir. By Kiyoshi Tanimoto and Koko Kondo.

12noon News and Weather. 12.04 12.15 Rare Earth. New series.

1.00 The World at One. 1.45 Human Intelligence. 2.00 The Archers.

2.15 Drama: Central Intelligence. 2.45 Living on the Edge.

Street 2.30 Billions 4.35 The Last of Us 6.40 House of the Dragon 9.00 Station Eleven 11.00 House of the Dragon

SKY COMEDY

Sky 113 Virgin 112

11.50am Will & Grace 12.20pm The Rehearsal 1.40 Upright 3.00 Will & Grace 4.00 The Office Movers 5.00 Community 6.00 Will & Grace 7.00 The Office (10) 8.00 The Office Movers 9.00 Sarah Silverman: Someone You Love 10.15 (Yvonne Orji & Whole Me 11.30 The Rehearsal

SKY DOCUMENTARIES

Sky 114 Virgin 121

12noon Enigma 2.00 FILM: Busby (2020) (PG) A profile of former Manchester United manager Matt Busby 4.00 The Directors 5.00 Discovering: Glenn Close 6.00 Queen of Speed 8.00 Savage

PICK OF TODAY'S RADIO

RARE EARTH, 12.04PM, RADIO 4

THIS summer's string of heatwaves — we've had an incredible five so far — has certainly challenged many of us and forced us to question whether the flats and houses that we live in are fit for purpose. Today Tom Heap, Helen Carrell and their expert guests set out to explore if

architects might be able to provide answers to our problems. Can they come up with ideas for homes that can be built or adapted to deal with extreme heat and whatever other challenges the changing climate is likely to throw at us in the years to come? Or is the challenge too great?

3.00 Gardeners' Question Time, Horticultural discussion show. 3.45 Short Works. 4.00 Last Word. 4.30 Sideways. 5.00 PM: Weather. 6.00 Six O'Clock News. 6.30 The People Have Spoken, New series. Ian Smith looks for satirical solutions to the world's problems.

7.00 The Archers. A decision is reached and Amber finds herself on the spot. 7.15 Add to Playlist. New series: Soweto Kinch and Niclay select tracks by black British music artists. 8.00 Any Questions? Typical discussion, chaired by Alex Forsyth.

Mountain 10.00 FILM The Alpinist (2021) (12) Documentary about elusive Canadian climber Marc-Andre Leclerc 11.50 Williams & Mansell Red 5

SKY HISTORY

Sky 123 Virgin 122 10.10am Junk & Disorderly 11.05 Storage Wars 12noon Combat Trains 1.00 Thomas Jefferson 3.00 Hardcore Pawn 6.00 American Pickers 7.00 Forged in Fire 8.00 Full Custom Garage 9.00 World War II Witness to War 11.00 HumanQuest

SKY ONE

Sky 108 Virgin 109 12noon Big Cats (Small World) 1.00 Hawaii First-O 3.00 SW A.T. 5.00 The Simpsons 8.00 An Idiot Abroad 2 9.00 Frank Skinner 30 Years of Dirt 10.00 Grimsburg 11.30 An Idiot Abroad 2

SKY SCI-FI

Sky 145 Virgin 140

11.00am Star Trek Enterprise 12noon Star Trek Voyager 1.00 Stargate Atlantis 2.00 Warehouse 13 4.00 Stargate ISU 5.00 Star Trek Voyager 6.00 Star Trek Enterprise 7.00 Stargate Atlantis 8.00 Stargate ISU 1 9.00 FILM Jurassic Attack (2021) (15) 10.40 Gramm 11.30 The Walking Dead

SKY WITNESS

Sky 107 Virgin 110 12noon FBI 2.00 The Bookie 3.00 Live & Order Criminal Street 4.00 Nothing to Declare 8.00 Chicago Med 9.00 Chicago Fire 10.00 Chicago PD 11.00 The Bookie

TLC

Freesieve 13 Sky 123 Virgin 113 12noon The Big Bang Theory 2.00 The Middle 3.30 Young Sheldon.

---

FREEVIEW PRIMETIME PLANNER 53

ITV3	ITV4	MORE4	SKY MIX	QUEST	U&DAVE	U&DRAMA	SSTAR	5USA
10	26	18	11	17	19	20	32	21
6.55 Heartbeat Mike joins forces with Scotland Yard when a gang of thieves arrives in Aldersfield to steal a horse	6.55 Sharpe Despatched by Munro to kill a French colonel, Sharpe is wounded in battle and how it is death's door — but Harper and a made run set about nursing him back to health	6.50 Car 5.0.5 Fuzz Download and Tim Jane restore 891 Flat Dino coupe	Star Trek: The Next Generation Wesley Crusher returns to find the crew of the Enterprise addicted to a new game	Antiques Road Trip Marge Cooper and Paul Martin head for Plymouth on the final leg of their journey	Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing From the river Test in Hampshire	7.20 Last of the Summer Wine Sid and Wally's wives become suspicious of their husbands' aridos	GPs: Behind Closed Doors in Birmingham, Yessin has bald patches and worries it's alopecia areata	NCIS Gibbs and the team find themselves in deep trouble with the FBI as they try to protect a veteran naval officer who has caught the attention of an al-Qaeda cell
Doc Martin Martin prepares to face his hearing, while a visitor to Perlemen returns to research her family tree		7.55 Grand Designs Ecologist Fred and communications manager Saffron Baker start building work on their own family home in the Peak District	Police 24/7 Police pursue a man riding a motorcycle recklessly and officers co-ordinate with each other to pin down a suspected stolen car	The Yorkshire Auction House in Durham, Angus Ashworth uncovers hidden riches in a collector's cottage	7.40 Would I Lie to You? With Jo Brand, Robin Cowan, Paul Ford and Ray Mears	Father Brown The sleuth discovers a murderer is using the model village to plan their attacks	Casualty 24/7: Every Second Counts Dave Walker takes charge of the situation at Barnsley Casualty when all of the IT systems in the department go down	NCIS A U.S. Marine veteran continues to committing a murder 10 years previously, so Gibbs decides to investigate
Doc Martin Martin's medical career remains under scrutiny, as a GMC representative arrives to assess him and his surgery	BoboCop 2 (1990,18) The cyborg law enforcer battles a deranged drug lord, unaware the corporation that created him is planning to replace him. Sci-fi thriller sequel, starring Peter Weller and Nancy Allen, includes FVI Daily	Carpe Diem Tom represents a fisherman who admits to murder, while Sigourney discovers a threatening figure from Tom's past	Wendetta (2822,25) When his daughter is brutally murdered and legal justice looks unlikely, William Duncan takes the law into his own hands. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis	The Repair Shop Jay Blades and his team of experts restore a cold purse for a wedding, a Flamenco guitar for a worldwide performer and a taxi meter from the 1920's	9.25 Would I Lie to You? At Christmas With Ray Winstone, Josh Wacktornbe, Rachel Riley and Ricky Tomlinson	Father Brown Lady Felicari's impromptu visit coincides with Father Brown helping out a friend at a gentlemen's club	99#: Critical Condition Father of four lies is rushed in after suffering a cardiac arrest, and Ken ends up with life-threatening injuries after falling from a roof	Beauty and the Beast Gabe recovers, while Cat is still determined to locate Vincent. Fortunately, she later locates him, but finds him a changed man
Grantchester A suspicious death interrupts the Easter Fete, and Alpha attempts to use the case as a distraction from his personal life		10.05 24 Hours in A&E A nine-year-old boy has a dangerously high heart rate, and doctors fear a 32-year-old man may have damaged his spine		The Repair Shop The team transforms a painting by a notable Scottish artist, an Arabic instrument known as an oud and a flying helmet owned by a female pilot	Magnum P.L. A dying man hires Thomas to find his brother, who turns out to need help as well, and the case brings back memories of a S.M. team mission that went wrong	New Tricks The team reopens the four-year-old case of a murdered street artist when graffiti by a person claiming to be the killer appears around London	A&E After Dark The night staff at Hull Royal Infirmary battle to save the sight of 16-year-old Patrick, who tripped and impaled her eye	Beauty and the Beast Vincent kidnaps Cat when she gets too close to learning the truth about his mission
Grantchester Alpha encounters a complication in his romantic life	11.15 All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite Hard-titting action from the world of All Elite Wrestling (To 135)	10.10 24 Hours in A&E A 19-year-old woman is brought in with spinal injuries after falling from a second-floor window (To 12.15)	Grimm Nick and Hank investigate the death of a popular music teacher eaten by rats, targeting roasted-slow-fetal-like character running a pest control firm (To 12.00)	How Do They Do It? Tips for brewing motorist in the heart of New York City	Magnum P.L. Thomas he is called in to find out who kidnapped 16-year-old Amanda, who managed to escaped from her captors (To 12.00)	11.20 Luther The cop is on a knife-edge as he tries to cover up a death, opposes Baba and protect Jenny from any harm, while also somehow finding the killer (To 12.40)	Trauma Room One Surgeons race to remove a life-threatening brain mass from 34-year-old Milton (To 12.00)	Law & Order: Special Victims Unit Institutions run high as the 5/61 squad embarks on a frantic search for Benson's missing son Noah after he is kidnapped (To 12.00)
11.50 Trial & Retribution Part one of two. A body is found (To 12.50)				How Do They Do It? The processes involved in mining rare gemstones (To 12.00)	How Do They Do It? Tips for brewing motorist in the heart of New York City

8.55 This Week in History

9.00 Natalie Haynes Stands Up for the Classics. A guide on using the Oracle to answer life's big questions.

9.30 Breakin' the Cycle. Colin and D shut down their empire.

10.00 The World Tonight. With Shaun Ley.

5.00 The Big Bang Theory 9.00 90 Day France 11.00 Dr. Pimple Pepper.

U&ALIBI

Sky 109 Virgin 114 12noon Body of Proof 1.00 Death in Paradise 2.00 Murfinch Mysteries 4.00 The Mentalist 5.00 Hudson & Roe 6.00 Body of Proof 7.00 Private Eyes 8.00 Death in Paradise 9.00 NCIS Sydney. A Navy compliance officer in found dead in a waterhole from a inquisite 10.00 Father Brown. 11.00 Private Eyes.

U&DAVE (DAYTIME)

Freeview 10 Sky 111 Virgin 127 11.25am Yukon Gold. 12.20pm Top Gear 2.20 Mortimer & Whitehouse. Gone Fishing 3.00 Guy Martin. Proper Jobs 4.00 Hazy Bikers. Best of British. 5.00 Rick Stein's Cornwall.

10.45 Book at Bedtime: The Vicar of Wakefield.

11.00 Americast.

11.30 A Good Read.

12midnight News and Weather.

12.30 Book of the Week: Hiroshima, 8.15:

The Lost Memoir.

By Kiyoshi Tanimoto and Koko Kondo.

12.48 Shipping Forecast. 1.00 BBC World Service.

U&DRAMA (DAYTIME)

Freeview 20 Sky 143 Virgin 118 11.40am The Bill. 12.40pm Classic EastEnders 2.00 Classic Neophones 3.00 Photostatic Pearl. 4.10 Lovelyn 5.20 As Time Goes By. 6.00 Last of the Summer Wine.

U&EDEN

Freeview 17 Sky 148 Virgin 176 12noon How Britain Worked. 5.00 You Rang. M'Leef!

U&GOLD

Sky 110 Virgin 124 11.40am Dad 12.20pm Only Fools and Horses. 1.00 Keeping Up Appearances 1.25 Dads Army 2.30 The Green Green Grass 3.00 Are You Being Served? 3.40 Dad 4.20 Dads Army 5.00 Last of the Summer Wine 6.20 Keeping Up Appearances 7.00 Dads Army 7.40 Only Fools and Horses. 8.20

RADIO 2 FM 88-90.2M1F2

6.30am The Sara Cox Breakfast Show. 9.30 Vernon Kay. 12noon Jeremy Vine. 2.00pm Mark Goodier. 4.00 Joel Davenett. 7.00 Michelle Vangee. 8.30 Michelle Vangee. Handling Hits. 9.00 Sophie Ellis-Bexler's Kitchen Dams. 11.00 The Rock Show with Shaun Keaveny. 12midnight Romesh Ranganathan. For the Love of Hip-Hop. 1.00am Tony Blackburne Sounds of Soul.

RADIO 3 FM 90-2-92.4M1F2

6.30am Breakfast 9.30 Essential Classics. 1.00pm Classical Live. 4.00 Composer of the Week. Montgerault. 5.00 In Time. 7.00 S.L.V. BBC Pruma 2026. 10.00 Life Function. 11.30 Round Midnight. 12.30am Through the Night.

RADIO 5 LIVE

886-888.9M1F2

5.00am Wake Up to Money 6.00 5 Live Breakfast. 9.00 Nicky Campbell. 11.00 Gordon Smart. 1.00pm Elie James and John Robins. 2.00 Matt Charley. 4.00 5 Live Dime. 7.00 5 Live Sport. 8.30 Athletics. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. 1.00am Charlie Taylor.

Are You Being Served? 9.00 Porridge. 9.35 Pawltn Towers. 10.20 Not Going Out. 11.00 Mrs Brown's Boys. 11.35 Porridge.

U&W

Freeview 25 Sky 132 Virgin 125 12noon DIY SOS: The Big Build. 1.00 Tipping Point. 4.00 Property Brothers. Forever Homes. 5.00 DIY SOS: The Big Build. 7.00 MasterCard Australia. The contestants see if they can work together. 8.00 Pete Wicks: Pat Digi Sake. 11.00 Gavin & Stacey.

U&YESTERDAY

Freeview 27 Sky 155 Virgin 139 11.00am The World at War. 12noon Antigone Roadshow. 2.00 Bangers & Cash. 4.00 Great War Stories. 5.00 The World at War. 6.00 Antigone Roadshow. 7.00 A Perfect Planet. 8.00 Canal Boat Diaries. 10.00 Bangers & Cash.

SPORT

SKY MAIN EVENT

Sky 401 Virgin 501

11.00am Live NFL 1.00pm Lunchtime Live. 2.00 The Hundred Live. 5.30 The Hundred Live. 7.15 Live GFL: Wolverhampton Wanderers v Blackburn Rovers (Kick-off Hym) 10.30 Live Tennis.

SKY PREMIER LEAGUE

Sky 402 Virgin 502

12noon Transfer Talk. 1.00 Brazillane in the Premier League. 2.00 City PL Champions. 3.00 Brazillane in the Premier League. 4.00 Fantasy Show. 4.30 Premier League Stories. 5.00 Premier League Years. 7.00 The Transfer Show. 8.00 Arsenal Champions Show. 9.00 Transfer 360. 10.00 Brazillane in the Premier League. 11.00 Premier League Years.

SKY CRICKET

Sky 405 Virgin 501

10.00am The Hundred. 1.30pm The Hundred Bitesize. 2.00 The Hundred Live. 5.30 The Hundred Live. 9.00 The Hundred Bitesize. 10.00 The Hundred.

SKY MIX

Sky 416 Virgin 511

12noon My Icon: Kelly Smith. 12.15 My Icon: Mary Chollock. 12.30 Dark Top: S Memento. 1.00 NFL Highlights. 2.00 My Icon: Nasser Peacock. 2.35 My Icon: Janine Peacock. 2.50 Live Ladies: European Tour Golf. The VP Bank Swiss Ladies Open. 5.30 NFL Highlights. 5.45 NFL Bitesize Highlights. 6.00 NBC's Pro-Football Talk. 8.00 Live Indycar. 9.30 Ferrari: Challenger UK Highlights. 10.00 Fight Night. 11.00 NFL Highlights.

TNT SPORTS 1

Sky 410 Virgin 521

12noon UEFA Champions League — Classics. 12.30 Live Snooker China Open. 4.00 Serie A – Full Impact. 6.00 TNT Sports Retard. 5.30 MLB Plays of the Week. 6.00 MLB Highlights. 7.00 The Fantasy Show. 7.30 AFL. 9.00 Serie A – Full Impact. 10.00 Premier League Preview. 11.00 FA Cup: The People's Story – Women's FA Cup. 11.15 MLB Highlights.

TNT SPORTS 2

Sky 411 Virgin 522

11.00am Live AFL. 2.00pm MLB Plays of the Week. 2.30 Live Men's Cycling Pro Series. 4.00 CPL Highlights. 4.30 Discovery Golf. 5.00 UEFA Super Cup. 6.30 Sign Up – Into Football. 7.00 Premier League Stories. 8.00 Tour de France Women. 9.00 UFC Countdown. 10.00 The Verdict. 10.45 Playing for Our Future – Cricket. 11.00 CPL Highlights. 11.30 Live CFL.

TNT SPORTS 3

Sky 413 Virgin 523

10.30am Live European Athletics Championships. 1.15pm CPL Highlights. 1.45 MLB Highlights. 2.45 Formula E Unplugged. 3.45 Live ABB FIA Formula E World Championship. 3.50 First de France Women. 6.00 Uphill Climb. 6.45 Playing for Our Future – Cycling. 7.00 UIM FHUO World Championship Highlights. 7.30 Live European Athletics Championships. 10.00 Snooker China Open.

MOVIES

FILM4

Freeview 14 Sky 313 Virgin 428 11.00am Cleopatra (1963) (PG) 3.45pm Siege of the Season (1963) (U) 5.30 The Battle at Apache Pass (1952) (PG) 7.15 Horizon Live (2020) (15) 9.00 Fury (2014) (15) Second World War drama, starring Brad Pitt. 11.40 The Invitation (2022) (15) 1.45am Infinity Pool (2023) (18)

GREAT ACTION

Freeview 42 Sky 310 Virgin 426 1.00pm The Unit. 2.00 Burn Notice. 4.00 Stipper Elite (2006) (15) 6.00 The Unit. 7.00 Burn Notice. 9.00 The Transporter Refueled (2021) (15) 11.05 The Avengers.

GREAT MYSTERY

Freeview 50 Sky 320 Virgin 435 12noon Unforgettable. 1.00 10 Plain Sight. 2.00 Castle. 3.00 Diagnostic Murder. 5.00 Murder, She Wrote. 7.00 Castle. 8.00 Unforgettable. 9.00 In Plain Sight. 10.00 Morning Show Mysteries. Murder Ever After. (2022) (PG) 11.50

Murder, She Baked A Deadly Recipe. (2016) (PG)

GREAT ARMANCE

Freeview 52 Sky 322 Virgin 434 10.15am Love on Retreat (2023) (PG) 12.10pm Just My Type (2020) (PG) 2.00 Secret Millionaire. (2018) (PG) 3.50 Love in Bloom. (2023) (U) 5.45 Love Goes: Reich. (2022) (U) 7.45 The Love Gala. (2023) (PG) 9.45 Just for Showmates. (2023) (U) 11.45 Home for Harvest. (2019) (PG)

SKY DRAMA

Sky 310 Virgin 450

11.25am Hamnet (2025) (U) 1.35pm A.B.N Tree (2018) (U) 3.30 A Star In Born. (2018) (15) 5.45 Erin Brockovich (2020) (15) With Julia Roberts. 8.00 The Showstand Redemption. (1994) (15) A Sanket wrongly jaded by the wild intruder, forms an extraordinary friendship with a fellow inmate over the course of their sentences. Drama, with Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman. 10.30 Hamnet. (2025) (12) With Paul Mescal.

SKY PREMIERE

Sky 301 Virgin 401

10.25am Looney Tunes: The Day the Earth Blew Up. (2014) (PG) 12.05pm Tom And Jerry Forbidden Compass. (2025) (PG) 1.55 Love Me. (2024) (15) 3.40 Herein. (2024) (15) 5.40 Song Sung Blue. (2025) (12) 1.55 Internet. (2025) (12) Premiere Period drama, starring Paul Mescal. 10.15 Normal. (2020) (15)

TALKING PICTURES TV

Freeview 83 Sky 324 Virgin 445 11.30am The Broken Horseshoe (1953) (PG) 1.05pm The Edgar Wallace Mystery Theatre. 2.15 The Adventures of Robin Hood. 2.45 Brandy for the Farms. (1952) (U) 4.20 Look at Life. 4.30 The Chesters. 5.00 A Family at War. 6.00 Reupses of the Bucky. 7.00 C Cars. 8.00 Public Eye. 9.05 Collar Club with Caroline Moyes. 9.10 Supernatural. 10.10 Collar Club with Caroline Moyes. 10.20 Tales of Frankenstein. 10.55 The Devil Bat. (1940) (PG)

---

Page 54

ARIES Mar 21 - Apr 20 WHEN we're in the middle of decorating, we notice

every brushstroke and often wonder whether we've made the right colour choice. Then, after living with it for a few days, it begins to feel like home. Feelings often need the same kind of adjustment period. Today encourages you not to rush into changing something simply because it feels unfamiliar. Give yourself the chance to settle into a recent decision before deciding whether it truly suits you. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0301*

TAURUS Apr 21 - May 21 IT'S easy to take for granted our ability to find

enough ingredients to make a meal. Most of us can concoct something satisfying from surprisingly little. We often overlook how resourceful we are because we're too busy thinking about what we don't have. Today shifts your attention towards what's already working. Abundance doesn't always arrive as something new. Sometimes it appears as a fresh appreciation of what you already have. Gratitude is always on the menu. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0302*

GEMINI May 22 - June 22 WHEN is enough really enough? Is it when a

feeling of unhappiness is stifled so effectively that we forget we can feel that way? The problem with always seeking stimulation is that when you arrive at destination success, the horizon has moved again. You can't shut out negative feelings indefinitely; things must be processed for them to move. Don't try so hard to get somewhere else today. Notice how far you've come and appreciate the view. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0303*

CANCER June 23 - July 23

IT'S amazing how much plants grow while you're on holiday. When we stop paying attention to every daily millimetre of development, the centimetres seem to come all at once. Changes are often difficult to see while they are happening. Emotions work in the same way. You may feel as though nothing much is happening when in fact steady progress is unfolding beneath the surface.

JEMIMA GAINER

JCAINER.COM

THERE is a tendency to assume that if nothing dramatic is happening, nothing important is happening. We celebrate breakthroughs, announcements and turning points because they're easy to recognise. Much less attention is given to the quieter periods when ideas

settle, emotions catch up with events, and we get a chance to hear ourselves think. The lulls are the places where lasting change takes root. Remaining present today, trusting the process and staying patient allows us to glimpse a more fulfilling future.

Keep caring for what matters. Trust that your efforts are working. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0304*

LEO July 24 - Aug 23 THERE'S a big difference between a comfortable

silence and an awkward one. Some relationships have the flex required for quiet intervals, others demand upkeep through continuous chatter. With whom do you feel so relaxed you don't feel the need to put on a performance? Who in your life allows you to simply be? Surround yourself with those kinds of people today. Not every meaningful moment has to be memorable enough to tell as a story later. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0305*

VIRGO Aug 24 - Sep 23

DIFFERENT days require different approaches. There are times for hustle and bustle and times to rest. Ah. That word again... What makes you so uncomfortable with the idea of a little relaxation? Are you really holding everything together by a fragile thread? Or could it be your nerves that are fraying? The Moon is in your sign but today there is little else happening, astrologically speaking anyway. It's a perfect time to tend to tiredness and let yourself off the hook. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0306*

LIBRA Sep 24 - Oct 23 HOW many of your 'days off' do you end up spending

running errands and remaining as busy as ever? If only you were as efficient at taking care of your need for recuperation as you are at ensuring everybody else's requirements are prioritised. Your reserves are not infinite. A well-earned pause today allows you to pour back into your spiritual well. Peace isn't created by carrying on eternally. It comes when you choose to make space for it. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0307*

SCORPIO Oct 24 - Nov 22 HAVE you

ever refound a favourite jumper and wondered why you stopped wearing it? Familiar things sometimes disappear without a reason. The same can happen with qualities we once valued in ourselves. Today encourages you to reconnect with a strength that's been overshadowed by recent demands. To move forward, you may simply need to remember a part of yourself that has been waiting patiently for another opportunity to be useful. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0308*

SAGITTARIUS Nov 23 - Dec 21

SCENIC routes are lovely when you have time to waste. You can notice all those little details that are missed in haste. What are you noticing coming to

• Calls cost 80p per minute plus your phone company's access charge and will last approximately 4 minutes. Head to jcainer.com and join Jemima's Moon Circle for exclusive extras, videos and live readings and exciting astrology workshops! To report a phone line problem, call 0330 100 0601.

the surface of your psyche today? Where has your attention been diverted for too long? A slower pace today allows for a methodical approach to a matter that you have been avoiding because of a lack of time. Success isn't measured by how far you get but by what you learn along the way. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0309*

CAPRICORN Dec 22 - Jan 20

HAVE you ever rediscovered a cable for some technology that became defunct 20 years ago? We all keep things because they might become useful again. Beliefs about responsibility can linger in much the same way. You may still be carrying obligations that belonged to an earlier chapter of your life. Today encourages you to consider letting go of unnecessary responsibility. It won't make you less dependable. It will let you spend energy where it can do the most good. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0310*

AQUARIUS Jan 21 - Feb 19 YOU can know somebody inside out and still

be surprised by something that's never previously come up in conversation. That doesn't mean your relationship is ineffective. We don't measure intimacy based on the amount of personal trivia that is retained. Relationships are based on trust. That comes from a different place than the facts we openly share with the world. Today the cosmos is providing you with the space to dig down to something deeper. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0311*

PISCES Feb 20 - Mar 20 THERE are

days when the best decision you make is that no more decisions are needed. Constant evaluation becomes very tiring. Today offers permission to stop searching for a better option and simply appreciate the one you've already chosen. Trust has a peaceful quality that overthinking rarely allows. You don't need every possibility to remain open forever. Sometimes happiness begins when you stop looking over your shoulder to see what else might have been. Curious about love, career or life choices? Get personalised guidance – call 0905 789 0312*

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STN

Page 55

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Page 56

PETERBOROUGH

email: pboro@dailymail.co.uk

A bit of foraging and then I'll head gnome

GNOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS

Down by the winding river, On the stony old dirt track, I watched a gnome come wandering,

His rucksack on his back. His stick was in his gnarled old hand,

He walked his daily jaunt, Sought treasures from the riverbank,

His favourite of haunts.

A fishbone, for his fiddle, It would make a decent bow,

As well as needles for his wife

When she had cause to sew, And acorn caps were welcome

For the little ones to use, While a piece of bark was handy

For the mending of their shoes.

Not forgetting some

wild flowers

For the lady of the home, As the wee folk know it's vital

To take care of Mrs Gnome. For she's the one that makes the cakes,

The puddings and the pies, To keep the menfolk's tummies

At a nicely rounded size.

As he walks the path well-trodden

All the beasts bid him good day,

And even fierce and growly ones

Have something good to say. There's no nicer disposition Than that of a

woodland gnome,

And the trees and flowers all wave to him

Wherever he may roam.

You might see a set of footprints

That just vanish on the path, And you'll hear him as he whistles

Or his fruity, chuckling laugh. As he drifts into his own land

He's no longer in full view, Now at home in his old tree stump

Sharing treasures old and new.

Lindsay Hartgroves, Launceston, Cornwall

Sign Language

GATES ARE NOT WORKING!

Any passengers using contactless payment, please use the blue ticket soldiers on platform 1 to tap out. If you don't, you may receive a access fee on your cards for an incomplete journey. We apologise for the incontinence this may cause.

CAUGHT SHORT:

Fortunately the station toilets were working! Spotted at Oxted railway station by Jock Muir of Oxted, Surrey.

Follow-up

I WAS a milkman years ago and found this note on a customer's door early one morning. It made me smile then, so I kept it and it still makes me smile now.

Lionel Earnden, Crewe, Cheshire

One-line

Philosophers

■ RUMOURS that Trump wears a toupee have all been swept under the rug.

Terry Harper, London E4

■ IT DOESN'T matter how you were raised, it's your responsibility to grow up. S. A. Challis, Chelmsford, Essex

Joke

I'VE never believed in astrology. We Scorpios are not easily fooled.

Stephen Herlihy, Paisley, Renfrew

Picture That!

HYDRATION BREAK: It was nice to see on untraffled pigeon taking a drink during the heatwave. Our spaniel, Ozzy, was less keen - it's his bowl!

Fiona Crawford, Fulford, N. Yorks

Out Of The Mouths Of Babes

WHEN our daughter Beth was four, she complained to her grandma: 'I don't like these double-strength mints.' Her grandma assured her that they weren't double-

Limerick

We thought we'd give Europe a try, Go motoring rather than fly. With nary a scruple The prices quadruple. Next year let's just stay home and fly.

Billy Holmes, Duffield, Derbys

strength, to which Beth replied: 'They are if you have two in at once.' Unsurprisingly, Beth now teaches maths!

Mrs D. Clapham, Scarborough, N. Yorks

Wordy Wise

KING'S LUNN — royal cake made by Bally.

LEAMINGTON SKA —

Warwickshire dance music. MOUNTAIN ASP — Cleopatra's snake in Wales.

SHEPTON MULLET — Somerset hairstyle.

TUNBRIDGE WALLS — Kent ice cream.

Aubrey Cartledge, Melksham, Wilts

■ SEND your contributions to Peterborough, Daily Mail Letters, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY

The Mail is published by ANL, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY. Printed by Newsprinters Holdings Ltd (Brosbourne); Newsprinters Holdings Ltd (Knowsley); Newsprinters Holdings Ltd (Gunszentral); AP Services (Jersey) Irish Times (Clywest, Dublin), Ireland; Bermont Impression, Madrid, TIFrint, SA, Tenerife; Miller Newsprint Ltd, Malta; Kronos Corporate Group Ltd, Cyprus; Millero Hellas Publisher Services Ltd, Athens; Atlas Media Communication, Dubai, UAE. The recycled paper content of UK newspapers in 2024 was 37.2%.

LETTERS

Country matters

THANKS to Minette Batters (Daily Mail) for a brilliant article on the challenges for 'dustbowl Britain'

Farmers have been totally neglected for years, even without being landed with a disgraceful inheritance tax burden by Rachel from Accounts.

The directive to give up productive farmland to rewilding was absolutely ridiculous and reduces the land available for growing valuable crops the country needs.

We should not be relying on other countries to feed us. We should learn again to eat only vegetables that are in season.

It would help if domestic science was reintroduced to the school curriculum. Far too many people now have no idea how to cook, and exist on ready meals and takeaways.

We need a productive countryside as well as revitalised High Streets.

JACQUELINE DERING, Corsham, Wilts

Boats and boots

THE official response from the Home Office to the boats crisis would be laughable if it were not so serious.

A payment-by-results deal with the French to put extra boots on the ground was signed, apparently.

Clearly it will make no difference whatsoever unless the boots in ques- tion actually move across the ground in the direction of the boats.

HILARY DAVIES, Llangefni, Anglesey ANDY, don't waste time going on a tour to find out what people want.

They want the boats stopped, wefare benefits cut and lower taxes. There, that's saved you a few quid.

PAULINE KELLY,

Weston-super-Mare, Somerset

Slothful justice

IN REPLY to John Wilson (Letters), we already effectively have a waiting list to enter prison.

It is caused by the unacceptable delay in bringing offenders to trial, then further delays before sentencing hearings are held after reports have been compiled.

Whatever happened to next-day court appearances and sentencing by the judge after the jury verdict? The monegrubbing lawyers found ways to enhance their earnings.

MARTIN HOWES, Telford, Salop

Result, misery

FURTHER to Andrew Neil's condem- nation of our colossal national debt (Daily Mail), I would argue the public and politicians are both to blame.

There are times when taking on debt is unavoidable, such as global financial crises and pandemics. Such debt cannot and should not be repaid

Write to: Daily Mail Letters, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY email: letters@dailymail.co.uk

■ Although we cannot respond individually, all correspondence received is read and considered. Thank you for writing.

Straight to the

POINT

■ YOU'RE very quiet, Ms Mahmood, Any reason?

IAN FISHER, Southampton, Hants

■ HOW did French police not see a 49ft dinghy filled with 230 people?

JOHN BROOMAN, Chestfield, Kent

■ WHY not build a bridge and be done with it?

PETER TAYLOR, Gravesend, Kent

■ WHY is the PM going on a listening tour? Can't he hear me screaming at him?

R. W. BIRKWOOD,

Stoke Lodge, Gloucs

■ WHEN will the Prime Minister of Makerfield realise he is no longer a mayor but has a country to run?

J. HIRBERT, Peterborough, Cambs

■ I KEEP being told one viewing of The Odyssey is not enough. It was for me.

P. WRIGHT, Oldham, Lancs

■ SAOIRSE RONAN as Linda McCartney? Whaaat?

T. J. HICKMAN,

Southampton, Hants

only by the generation that incurred it. But, let's be honest, the only thing that matters to politicians is to be in power and to be re-elected.

Running up national debt is irrele- vant to them, as they will be long gone when it needs repaying. And they face no penalty for incurring it, such as being banned from office.

Yet how many of us will vote for a government that raises taxes to pay off UK debt so that we live within our means, when the debt can be passed to our children and grandchildren?

Only when the UK is refused loans by world markets will we all finally grasp the nettle.

JAMES WIGNALL, Accrington, Lancs

Good eggs

I WOULD contest Tony Clark's (Let- ters) contention that eggs absorb air.

Actually, eggs lose water over time, creating an air pocket inside the egg, thus they will float. Fresh eggs do not float, as they have no air inside them.

Also, I thought everyone knew to prick an egg before boiling.

Mrs SANDY RHODES,

Goring-by-Sea, W. Sussex

Extraordinary

MY WIFE PIPPA

by Len Lewis

A DAUGHTER of the manse, Pippa was born in Scarborough but was still a child when her vicar father was transferred to a village church in Borset and the family moved south. After boarding at the Blue Coat School in Birmingham, she attended Salisbury Technical College, where she learnt touch typing and Pitman shorthand, which stood her in good stead in her late teens when she worked as a secretary, first in London, then in Paris. Later she lived in Oldenburg, Germany, and worked in a bar. Pretty and popular, she had a few

romances there and when she returned to the UK in 1967 she was pregnant with her daughter Claire. She resisted pressure to have the child adopted, instead moving in with her sister Joan in Reading and proudly raising Claire as a single man. I met her at a party in London in 1972 and was instantly smitten. We began dating and married a year later, moving to Emsworth, near the Portsmouth HQ of my employer, IBM. Our son Tim was born in 1975.

In the 1980s Pippa embarked on a new enterprise, As someone familiar with computers, I suggested that we acquire and master the newfangled word

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Page 57

Top sports should all be free-to-view

I WAS annoyed to find the Glasgow Commonwealth Games was available only by subscription on TNT Sports and, as a result, the coverage was extremely poor: it seemed to be roughly 20 per cent adverts, 70 per cent chat from pundits and only 10 per cent action, with many of the main events being missed.

Surely this event should be in the same Olcom 'listed events' category as the men's FA Cup final and the Olympics, which by law must be available on free-to-view TV.

Nowadays, of course, practically all top sports are available only by subscription to Sky or TNT, the only real exceptions being Wimbledon tennis (so far), some athletics, and darts and snooker. It is disgraceful that next year's Ashes series will be shown live only on Sky.

If Andy Burnham really wants to do something for the working class, and the rest of us, he should push through legislation banning exclusive pay-to-view TV coverage of major sports including Premier and Champions League football, F1 motor racing and Test Match cricket.

There might even be certain knock-on benefits, including the

Up for it: Australian pole vaulter Kurtis Marschall in action in Glasgow

demise of 'shady' internet TV companies, some of which provide illegal coverage of major sports at a fraction of the cost of a Sky or TNT subscription. Internet TV has a place for web-based coverage of free-to-view channels. I wouldn't lose any sleep over Sky or TNT's loss of revenue. Both channels are jam-packed with adverts to boost their income anyway.

ANTHONY GEORGE JIGGENS, Dordogne, France

DEAR BBC, at least you are covering the European Athletics Championships from Birmingham, until Sunday, unlike the Commonwealth Games. However, can you please show viewers more of the events in progress, instead of making us suffer the interminable, repetitive and irritating musings of your collection of pundits while field events can be seen going on in the background.

WILLEM HART, Southampton, Hants

Imperfect guest

I AM obviously not an average Daily Mail reader if, as Alex Gilmour (Inspire) suggests, being a good house guest means sending a case of wine prior to arrival.

I'm guessing one from Aldi or Lidl wouldn't hack it.

BARBARA MAYNARD, Aldwick, W. Sussex

Left wingers

WHEN walking on pavements (Letters), those nearest the road should walk on the left, to face oncoming traffic.

At one time, several streets in Basingstoke had paving slabs inscribed with the message 'walk on the left', to help avoid collisions between pedestrians in the dark.

ALAN BRACKSTONE, Basingstoke, Hants

Rest in peace

LIKE reader Ian Duckworth (Letters), I too am uncomfortable about ancient bones being disinterred.

I have given strict instructions on my cremation to my children, as I fear being disturbed in the years to come.

SHARON ADAMS, Bath, Somerset

Crude loos

CAMBRIDGE City Council, in installing several public 'squat' toilets, obviously gave little thought to those of us who, through age or infirmity, are unable to accomplish the required posture.

So much for inclusivity.

C. SIMPSON, Wokingham, Berks

IN THE late 1950s, I went hitchhiking in Europe with some mates and we were disgusted by the public squat toilets we found, which were unhygienic monstrosities.

The day an official from Cambridge City Council needs to use one, I'll wager they all get changed.

DAVID EDWARDS, Billington, Beds

LETTER OF THE WEEK

THIS week's winner is Joanne Fuller, of West Wickham, Kent, who discussed the sorry state of London's West End. She wins our Letter Of The Week Magic Mug, courtesy of Printer Fix. These reveal our Daily Mail Letter Of The Week design when hot. For personalized photo gifts (right), visit printerpix.co.uk. The Letter Of The Week is announced on Friday. Write to: Daily Mail, Letters, 9 Derry Street, London

Printerpix

WB 5HY or email letter(s) dailymail.co.uk, including your address and phone number.

LIVES

'A life-enhancing woman': Pippa

HAVE you lost a relative or friend in recent months whose life you'd like to celebrate? Our Friday column tells the stories of ordinary people who lived extraordinary lives. Email your

processor and start a business demonstrating it to companies. It went well and led her to an administrative role with the Politics Association, which promoted the teaching of politics. She organised ticket sales to schools and colleges for its conferences, working with the historian and educator Sir Anthony Seldon. Later, Pippa wrote magazine articles on topics such as music production and local radio. When she

450-word tribute and a favourite photo to: lives@dailymail.co.uk or write to: Extraordinary Lives, Daily Mail, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY. Please include a contact phone number.

interviewed record producer Tony Visconti, he marvelled at her ability to record his words verbatim in shorthand. In retirement, Pippa was unable to sit still. As she was an excellent cook, in 2004 we decided to open and run a restaurant together in a village in Brittany, where we had a holiday home - it was an enjoyable four years. We returned to the UK in 2018, moving to Wiltshire. Sadly, two years ago Pippa developed a cancerous tumour and in

June she passed away. At her memorial service, Sir Anthony Seldon paid tribute: 'It was a joy to work with Pippa... she made everything so effortless and enjoyable, dealing with people with calm, authority and humour. What a magical, life-enhancing woman.' Pippa was indeed a beautiful soul, who right until the end cared more for others than herself.

■ PHILIPPA MARY LEWIS, born September 5, 1947; died June 7, 2026, aged 78.

WHAT is US Secretary of State Marco Rubio saying to Ed Miliband in Washington DC? Write an amusing caption in the speech bubble and email it, with your name and address, to pboro@dailymail.co.uk to arrive by Thursday, August 20. The writer of the caption judged the best wins a £20 book token. This week's winner is Anthony Cockram, of Exeter; Devon, who has Defence Secretary Wes Streeting saying to Andy Burnham as they meet apprentices at a submarine factory in Barrow-in-Furness:

FOR permission to copy cuttings for internal management and information purposes, please contact the Newspaper Licensing Agency (NLA), PO Box 101, Tunbridge Wells TN1 1WX. Tel: 01892 525273. e-mail: copy@nla.co.uk

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Page 58

QUESTION Why do most cartoons have characters with only three fingers and a thumb?

SOMEWHAT disappointingly, cartoon characters are mostly a digit down on the standard five primarily for reasons of efficiency and cost, although some observers do cite aesthetic balance – Walt Disney famously noted that five fingers on a hand look like a 'bunch of bananas'.

Given that animators must draw up to 24 individual frames per second of film, dropping a finger saves thousands of lines and drastically reduces labour costs across a project. In short, a four-digit hand is easier to draw.

While the four-digit hand is an industry standard, there are some notable exceptions to the rule.

In The Simpsons, God is uniquely drawn with all five fingers to signify his divine, perfect status.

Japanese animation also favours five-fingered characters since four fingers are associated with the Yakuza crime organisation, who ritually self-amputate the top of their pinky finger as a form of atonement – some Western shows even have a fifth finger edited onto characters for Japanese broadcast.

However, with the advent of 3D computer animation significantly reducing the costs and time involved in hand-drawn production, it will be interesting to see if the industry norm sticks with four fingers or adds a fifth.

Janet Fraser, Northampton

QUESTION 4 What is the longest period the UK has ever gone without any rain?

THE longest recorded consecutive period without rain in the UK was recorded in 1893 at Mile End in East London, which went for 73 days without a single measurable drop of rain falling. Even more unusually this occurred outside of the summer months, between March 4 and May 15.

Many readers will recall the punishingly hot summer of 1976 when parts of southern and south-west

QUESTIONS

Q: As a child if I fidgeted my mother would say I was suffering with St Vitus's Dance. Is there such a condition?

Michael Evans, Sutton Coldfield

Q: With much of the country in drought, why isn't sea water collected in separate reservoirs and used to flush toilets?

Frank Lobo, London SE25

Q: What did Scottish religious leader John Knox mean when he referred to the 'monstrous regiment of women'?

Emily Peters, Peterborough

Mystery of a missing digit

Jazz hands: The Simpson family have only three fingers and a thumb

England went for 45 days without rainfall. Comparisons have been made between 1976 and our current summer, but 1976's 15 consecutive days when temperatures exceeded 32.2 degrees makes it a longer heatwave than any experienced this year... so far.

However, the summer of 2026 is now officially drier than 1976's historic sizzler. Wisley in Surrey has recorded 38 days without rain (and counting), dating back to June 17.

England and Wales experienced the driest July since records began 190 years ago, while around the UK as a whole it was the driest July since 1868. Wales has also experienced its warmest July ever.

In England a declared 6.5mm of rainfall was 10 per cent of the meteorological average for the month of July and less than half of the previous record of 13.4mm in 1911.

More than two thirds of England and all of Wales are officially in drought. Northern Ireland is not in drought and, amusingly, Scotland does not declare droughts but does monitor 'water scarcity'.

Despite all this rewriting of drought records, when rain finally falls on the UK's parched, sun-baked yellow grasslands we will be at severe risk of flash flooding... it never rains but it pours!

Mark Davies, Peel, Isle of Man

QUESTION When were driving tests introduced in the UK? And how have they changed over the years?

VOLUNTARY testing was introduced on March 16, 1935, as part of the Road Traffic Act 1934, in advance of compulsory testing later that year.

In the 1930s, more than 7,000 people were dying in road collisions

each year, so there was pressure to improve driving standards.

The first person to pass the voluntary test was a Mr R. Beere, who paid seven shillings and sixpence for the privilege.

Driving licences had been introduced by the Motor Car Act 1903 and, from June 1, 1935, all people who had been driving since April 1, 1934, had to take a test.

Roughly 250,000 people applied for the tests and the pass rate was 63 per cent. A total of 250 examiners had been recruited but there were no test centres in 1935, so drivers would meet their examiners at places such as town halls, railway stations or post offices.

The test would last 30 minutes and focused on drivers' ability to control vehicles and featured some of the manoeuvres still in the test today, such as reversing.

Unlike today, if you'd passed a motorcycling test, you didn't need to have to take a test for a car.

Drivers had to know how to use hand signals, although this part of the test ended in 1975. And there would be questions about The Highway Code, the code having been introduced in 1931.

This portion of the test was replaced by a written theory test in 1996, which, in 2000, became digital. In 2015 the theory test started using computer-generated imagery for its hazard perception sequences, instead of filmed clips and, in 2017, the ability of the driver to respond to satellite navigation instructions was added to the practical test.

A. Simpson, St Albans

■ IS THERE a question to which you want to know the answer? Or do you know the answer to a question here? Write to: Answers To Correspondents, Daily Mail, 9 Derry Street, London W8 5HY, or email answers@dailymail.co.uk A selection is published, but we're unable to enter into individual correspondence.

TODAY'S RECIPE: Rice noodle salad with peanut butter tempeh

Dairy-free and low-calorie. Serves 2 Ingredients

Rapeseed oil, for the tray 2 tbsp crunchy peanut butter

I large garlic clove, finely grated

100g tempeh, sliced and cut into bite-sized pieces

For the salad:

100g vermicelli rice noodles

I large lime, zested and juiced

I tbsp sweet chilli sauce

I large carrot, cut into matchsticks

160g cucumber, halved lengthways, deseeded and sliced

2 spring onions, finely chopped

2 tbsp chopped mint

2-3 tbsp chopped coriander

Method

1 Heat the oven to 200C/fan 180C/gas 6. Line a baking tray with foil and rub with a little oil. Mix the peanut butter with 2 tbsp boiling water and the garlic, then add the tempeh and stir to coat. Arrange on the tray and bake for 10-12 mins, until golden.

2 Meanwhile, cook the noodles according to the pack instructions, then rinse and drain. Mix the lime zest and juice with the chilli sauce in a large bowl. Stir in the carrot, cucumber and spring onions, then toss through the noodles, mint and coriander. Pile into bowls, top with the baked tempeh and serve.

Good Food's Sara Buenfeld

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Page 59

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Page 60

Property Mail

Expert insight into swapping homes for heavenly hideaways to fit budgets

Your slice of the good life

Go with the flow: The Kennet and Avon Canal is a feature of tranquil Newbury, Berkshire

Adlington Retirement Living communities are thoughtfully designed for later life with each premium, contemporary apartment connected to a wealth of facilities, landscaped gardens, and within easy reach of vibrant local shops and services. So, whether you're enjoying quiet time in your private apartment, entertaining family and friends in the restaurant, or chatting with the dedicated team, your new chapter can truly make the best of life.

One, two and three-bedroom retirement apartments available to buy from $199,950 to $894,950.

"It's given us freedom, peace of mind and a lifestyle we genuinely enjoy." Homeowners, Elaine and Richard

The Spindles, Menston, West Yorkshire, 01943 660530 Riverside Gardens, Knaresborough, North Yorkshire, 01423 222478 Brookfields House, Newcastle, Staffordshire, 01782 958850 Broodleaf House, Wylde Green, West Midlands, 0121 817 8680 The Newells, Kempston, Bedfordshire, 01234 988200 Radford House, Exeter, Devon, 01392 341515

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*Prices consist of time of publication, additional charges apply. See website or call for details. Images shown for illustrative purposes only.

by Ben West

MANY of us dream of a slice of the good life, away from the hurly-burly of the city in some of the country's more peaceful locations. But with prices in more tranquil, attractive places usually at a premium, it can be difficult to find property that does not cost the Earth.

Luckily, the UK is home to a number of enviable locations that are similarly desirable, yet considerably off the radar – meaning property prices are significantly lower.

We asked a number of experts where to focus on to find a heavenly hideaway at a bargain price. These are their top picks.

SWAP SADDLEWORTH FOR SLAITHWAITE, WEST YORKS

JAKE Rowson, sales director at agents Ryder & Dutton, says: 'Slaithwaite is one of Yorkshire's best-kept secrets.

'It's an old textile village that has really come into its own, with independent shops, cafes and bars opening up regularly, the Huddersfield Narrow Canal running through the middle, and countryside walks straight from your front door.

'In sought-after Saddleworth, over the hill, you'd struggle to find a nice two-bed cottage for less than £250,000. In Slaithwaite, you can pick one up for £200,000. And there's a station in the village with direct trains to Manchester and Leeds.'

BUY IT: Slaithwaite Hall is believed to be the oldest surviving property in the Colne Valley, dating back to the 15th century, this exceptional Grade II-listed property has five bedrooms, a magnificent great hall, barn, storerooms and more. Available for £850,000 with Ryder & Dutton (ryderdutton.co.uk).

SWAP LYME REGIS FOR WEYMOUTH, DORSET

JAMIE Grierson, area manager for Dorset at Connells estate agents, says: 'For buyers who love the character and coastline of Lyme Regis but are finding property prices beyond their budget, Weymouth offers a fantastic alternative.

'The town combines a beautiful sandy beach, picturesque harbourside and access to the Jurassic Coast while often providing considerably more value for money.'

Families are also often enticed by the good choice of schools, a lively town centre with national retailers and independents plus excellent leisure opportunities.

BUY IT: Where in the UK can you buy a six-bed home with panoramic sea views and a private roof terrace for £475,000? Weymouth. Available with Connells (connells.co.uk).

SWAP LINCOLN OR NOTTINGHAM FOR LOUTH OR MARKET RASEN

WHILE cathedral city Lincoln is often top of buyers' lists, on account of its historic charm and cobbled streets, why not opt for the market towns of Louth and Market Rasen? They offer a gentler pace

Peaceful: Colourful cottages around the harbour at Weymouth in Dorset

of life, a blend of heritage and community plus surprisingly low property prices.

On the edge of the Lincolnshire Wolds, they feature historic architecture plus rolling hills without the high prices. They have independent butchers, grocers and other shops, and a weekly market.

'With its unspoilt inland and coastal landscapes coupled with historic towns and a beautiful cathedral city, Lincolnshire's appeal lies in its authenticity and variety,' says Rupert Fisher, of Savills.

BUY IT: A one-bedroom first floor apartment is located in the highly sought after Westgate in Louth, near the town centre. Available with TES Property for £75,000 (tes-property.co.uk).

SWAP NEWQUAY FOR ST COLUMB MAJOR, CORNWALL

LILY Miegel, branch manager for Miller Countrywide in Newquay, says: 'Amidst the rolling Cornish countryside, St Columb Major is a town rich in history, character and timeless charm.

'Offering the perfect balance between peaceful market town living and effortless access to Cornwall's spectacular north coast, it has become an increasingly desirable destination for those seeking a slower pace of life.'

Quanit streets, traditional pubs and a sense of community create an atmosphere that is welcoming and enduring.

BUY IT: A one-bed flat in the Market Place of St Columb Major has an open-plan kitchen and living area. It is for sale by the Modern Method of Auction, meaning buyer and seller complete within 56 days. Available with Miller Countrywide, offers from £85,000 (millercountrywide.co.uk).

SWAP OXFORD OR READING FOR NEWBURY, BERKSHIRE

VICTORIA Anderson-Stewart, of Savills, says: 'Newbury is a thriving and vibrant historic market town, surrounded by beautiful countryside and complete with excellent connectivity.

'It has lots to offer, including two popular theatres, a twice-weekly market, and a wide variety of eateries including independents alongside familiar brands.

'There's a choice of well-regarded pubs in the numerous nearby villages.'

BUY IT: Three-bed to five-bed homes are available at Knights Grove, a new development on the edge of Newbury. They are available with Savills from £510,000 (savills.com).

---

xx

Page 61

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Page 62

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Page 63

City Finance

FTSE 100 60.48 NASDAQ 100 341.90 GOLD 55.11 10772.67 0.56% 30084.50 1.15% $4373.42 1.24% FTSE 250 22.83 S&P 500 50.49 OIL 0.67 24837.71 0.09% 7798.99 0.65% $88.23 0.75% £/$ 1.3495 £/€ 1.1702 0.0015 0.0004

City Editor Alex Brunner

www.thisinoneye.co.uk

Business Editor Hugo Duncan

Budget uncertainty could 'snuff out' UK growth

THE Prime Minister was last night warned that uncertainty over the Budget could 'snuff out' growth in the fragile economy.

Official figures yesterday showed output rose 0.4pc in the second quarter of the year as warm weather and the World Cup boosted business in June, offsetting the hit from the Iran war.

But that was weaker than the 0.6pc expansion in the first three months of 2026, with analysts warning of worse to come as higher prices and elevated borrowing take a toll.

The report underlined the task facing Andy Burnham and his Chancellor John Healey, who have vowed to 'drive growth in every postcode'. It is feared their plans

By Hugo Duncan

will involve £25bn of tax hikes, hammering households and businesses, and putting the economy into reverse.

At the same time, Treasury officials said the economy will grind to a halt if Donald Trump continues his war on Iran, with growth set to be just 0.3pc next year.

Martin Beck, chief economist at WPI Strategy, said: 'The outlook remains exposed to both international shocks and domestic policy mistakes.

'Progress in the Middle East could once again unravel, while October's Budget could impose significant taxes on investment and capital or put fresh obstacles in

the way of businesses responding to market signals. Another prolonged bout of speculation about what the Chancellor might announce would encourage businesses to delay hiring and investment, even if the eventual tax increases prove less severe than feared.

'A stronger outlook is now plausible, but policy still has the power to snuff it out.'

Yael Selfin, chief economist at KPMG, said: 'The UK economy closed out the first half on a strong footing, but momentum is likely to fade over the coming months.

'Attention will turn to potential changes in fiscal policy in the Budget. Any prolonged period of speculation around fiscal policy could cause firms to delay invest-

ment decisions and households to take a more cautious approach to spending.'

The figures from the Office for National Statistics showed that while the services sector has grown since Labour came to power, output in manufacturing and construction has shrunk.

'Growth in every postcode? How about growth in every sector?' said Simon French, economist at Panmure Liberum.

Mike Randall, chief executive of Simply Asset Finance, which helps fund small businesses, said: 'Growth in every postcode' needs to stop being a party slogan and actually translate into removing the barriers that stop good businesses getting on with the job.'

Ashley scoops up Harvey Nicks in $40m rescue

By Emily Hawkins

MIKE Ashley's Frasers Group has snapped up Harvey Nichols for £40m - but warned it will become a 'smaller business' amid fears for jobs.

The tycoon, whose empire includes Sports Direct and House of Fraser, bought the retailer out of administration yesterday.

The rescue includes six Harvey Nicks stores in the UK, but not the one in Dublin, and safeguards 1,000 jobs - for now. There are fears job cuts will follow as Frasers attempts to revive the struggling business.

Frasers chief executive Michael Murray, who is Ashley's son-in-law, warned of 'tough choices' ahead.

He said: 'We are prepared to make those decisions, even if it means a smaller business in the near term.'

Frasers did not disclose what it paid, but it is thought to be around £40m.

It will buy six department stores - the flagship Knightsbridge site plus shops in Edinburgh, Birmingham, Leeds and Manchester and Bristol - the website and franchises, which include shops in Dubai and Kuwait.

Although it has bought stock and store fixtures from the Dublin store, Frasers has not bought the shop and said discussions over its future are 'ongoing'.

Staff have been facing uncertainty since owner Dickson Poon put Harvey Nicks up for sale in June.

The transaction excludes the Oxo Tower restaurant, which has been sold to another buyer.

Ashley said last week that the chain was 'in a death spiral'. Last night Murray said: 'Harvey

Ab Fab: Eddy and Patsy in the BBC TV show and, left, Mike Ashley

Nichols is an iconic institution with significant potential, but meaningful change is needed.

He said a turnaround would involve 'integrating Harvey Nichols into our existing luxury ecosystem' - sparking fresh worry over the future of head office jobs and stores.

Retail expert Jonathan De Mello expects some poorly performing regional shops may shut or be rebranded as House of Fraser or Flannels stores.

'The business needs a root-and-branch overhaul, principally

around winning back customers,' he said. 'That will take time and effort, but Frasers seems to be in it for the long term.'

The business had previously said prospective buyers would need to invest as much as £60m to restore its former glory.

High street fashion chain Next withdrew its interest earlier this summer, while some private equity companies were reportedly involved in buyout talks.

The Knightsbridge store opened in 1889. It was bought by Poon in 1991 for £53m and listed

in 1996 before being taken private in 2003.

In its 1990s heyday, fans included Princess Diana and other 'Sloane Rangers', and it was name-checked heavily in the TV comedy Absolutely Fabulous, starring Joanna Lumley and Jennifer Saunders.

Mary Portas, the store's creative director, transformed it into a trendy destination, with eye-catching window displays.

But it has failed to make a profit for five years. Frasers made a £528m profit last year.

Maidenhead to Mayfair: Big Mike's empire

THE purchase of Harvey Nicks hands Mike Ashley a British high street crown jewel.

The tracksuit tycoon has come a long way since setting up his first shop, Mike Ashley Sports, in Maidenhead in 1982, which would later become Sports Direct.

It quickly expanded, reaping the rewards of a 'stack them high, sell them cheap' strategy to sell budget kit.

Ashley then began adding to his range of brands, which now span retailers selling sportswear, bicycles and luxury fashion, by taking on household names such as Lonsdale and Dunlop.

The group listed on the London Stock Exchange in 2007. It bought around half of the luxury fashion chain Flannels in 2012, then the rest of it in 2017.

Ashley picked up the ailing House of Fraser department store chain for £90m in 2018 after it crashed.

The whole group was rebranded from Sports Direct International to Frasers Group in 2019.

Ashley failed in a bid for the collapsed Debenhams in 2021, losing out to Manchester giant Boohoo.

In recent years, he has pursued luxury, snapping up Savile Row tailor Gieves & Hawkes.

Last month, Frasers disclosed a 4pc stake in British fashion house Burberry, and it owns 37pc of Mulberry. It is also vying to buy the rest of German fashion brand Hugo Boss, in which it has a 30pc-plus stake.

---

Page 64

Peevish return for Reeves

THE silence of Rachel Reeves since it became clear Kerr Starmer was finished has been deafening.

Yet, on cue, the former Chancellor is out there on social media during an August scorcher to claim ownership of the 'stability, investment and reform' to an economy which delivered a lift of 0.4pc in the second quarter.

The UK is on track to be alongside the United States as the fastest-growing GT nation in 2026.

The reality is that the leap forward comes despite Reeves' stewardship, which saw consumers and businesses weighed down by £75bn of new taxes and Angela Rayner's destructive employment reforms.

The UK continues to outperform European peers without the Reeves remedy of cosying up to Brussels.

Andy Burnham and his Chancellor John Healey have a flying start. Burnham is good at parlaying a tricky inheritance into making people feel better.

Confidence is terribly important and the wooden contributions of Starmer and Reeves about the parlous state of the UK, with playbacks to Liz Truss mayhem, exuded pessimism.

Instead of playing to Britain's strengths

Alex Brummer

CITY EDITOR

• a booming service sector, vibrant tech and extraordinary creativity - Reeves backed a slow pony by insisting that the solution to growth was building houses.

Indeed, Burnham should dial down his obsession with affordable housing and state control of utilities.

Such measures will weigh on a stretched balance sheet rather than encourage the expansion necessary to drive down deficits and debt.

Similarly, it is time that Burnham and Healey stopped snarking about a cost-of-living crisis.

Pears that the stand-off in the Gulf of Hormuz would bring the global economy to a halt and turn us all into paupers are misjudged. Real wages are rising and ben-

efits, as the Office for Budget Responsibility has pointed out, are unnecessarily indexed to average earnings.

The breakdown of output figures for the last three months tells us where focus should be. Almost all growth is coming from services. Investment picked up 1.2pc, with ICT and equipment going strongly. Even more reason for the Chancellor to double down on full expensing of corporation tax so that the digital economy, cyber and AI are fully included.

Manufacturing was a laggard. The green agenda, which brought virgin steel production to a halt, played a part.

Reinvigorating construction requires recognising that listed housebuilders are key to meeting targets.

Breaks on stamp duty and Help to Buy, for all their faults, drove growth. There should be no doubt about Britain's resilience. No economy can thrive for long with roadblocks such as employment law changes adding billions to business costs.

Healey has brought forward the Budget by a month to October 28. The Chancellor doesn't have to be the Grinch who stole Christmas. He should consider judicious tax cuts, such as stamp duty on shares and housing, to bolster growth.

Radical welfare cuts, rather than wealth taxes, would underpin recovery.

Pour the Bolly

WHO imagined Harvey Nichols, an exemplar of British luxury shopping, would end up in the hands of Mike Ashley?

Online shopping, energy bills, property taxes and rising costs of employment meant the store chain became a liability.

As is often the case, Mike Ashley and his son-in-law Michael Murray have swooped in as buyers of last resort, snapping up the famed Knightsbridge store and five regional outlets for £40m.

Ashley's ownership isn't always smooth, as the purchase and swift administration of Matches in 2023-24 showed.

Buying from private equity, which squeezed the lemon dry, is different from an unadulterated purchase from professional administrators. It is another lift for Murray's 'elevation' strategy aimed at bolstering brand choice and profits.

Slam dunk

THE sale of LA Lakers basketball to a consortium that includes former Disney boss Bob Iger and Josh Kushner, for an astonishing $12.5bn, should have Premier League and European football club owners rubbing their hands in glee.

Properly monetised soccer is one of the great, still investable, assets.

WELL-HEELED SHOPPERS BOOST PROFITS AT BIRKENSTOCK

BIRKENSTOCK lifted its annual forecasts as wealthy shoppers snap up pricey sandals. Sales rose 13pc to £614.5m in the three months to the end of June, beating analyst expectations of £609m.

The business, set up by cobbler Johannes Birkenstock more than 250 years ago, said demand for its closed-toe shoes was booming.

Celebrity fans of its £150 suede 'Boston' shoes include Kendall Jenner and Katie Holmes. This follows roaring demand for its sandals, which featured in the 2023 Barbie film, starring Margot Robbie.

It saw growth across all regions, including 18pc in the Asia-Pacific and 15pc in Europe, the Middle East and Africa, even as the conflict in Iran has depressed consumer spending at other brands.

Birkenstock profits rose 15pc to £16.5m.

The German company is now expecting annual revenues to rise 15pc, compared with its earlier guidance of between 13pc and 15pc.

Backlash over Burnham attack on UK bookies

LABOUR is facing a mounting backlash over its attack on gambling as industry chiefs warn of site closures and job losses.

Stella David, the boss of Ladbrokes and Coral owner Entain, said a 'significant and disappointing' rise in remote gaming duty from 21pc to 40pc in April by Rachel Reeves would have a 'massive impact'.

The company behind Mecca bingo halls and Grosvenor Casinos said further tax hikes on the industry under Andy Burnham's regime would force venues out of business.

Under Reeves' plans, the levy on online sports betting will go up from 15pc to 25pc in April.

And although she has been sacked, Burnham has raised the prospect of a fresh onslaught after he announced a clampdown on rules linked to opening betting shops.

He sparked outrage by jumping such sites in with vape

By Hugo Duncan

shops and 'dodgy businesses linked to organised crime' as he outlined his proposals to save Britain's 'hollowed-out' high streets.

David stressed that its shops are 'valued' by communities and said numbers are in decline, with Ladbrokes closing 45 in the Republic of Ireland and Northern Ireland this

'Much-loved bingo halls will close'

year. And she outlined the cost of the hike in remote gaming duty imposed by Rachel Reeves, after Entain last month announced plans to cut 500 jobs.

It is very early days, but the tax changes are going to have a massive impact. It is likely to be around £250m,' she said.

Richard Harris, chief execu-

tive of the Rank Group behind the Mecca and Grosvenor brands, said: 'Tax proposals from anti-gambling campaigners continue to cast clouds over a regulated industry that is proud to support jobs across the country and deliver great hospitality experiences to millions. Rank paid over £225m in taxes and duties last year.

'Tax increases for clubs like ours, with high levels of supervision and operating on tight margins, will swiftly lead to lower tax receipts as much-loved bingo halls and casinos will be forced to close, impacting customers in local communities.'

William Hill owner Evoke this week said it had shut more than a fifth of its betting shops as it is battered by the tax.

And figures from the Betting and Gaming Council show more than 540 shops have closed, with the loss of 4,500 jobs, since the changes made in last year's Budget.

By Angharad Carrick

SALES at Jaguar Land Rover (JLR) are struggling to recover as it battles higher costs and supply issues caused by the Middle East conflict.

It said revenue of £6bn for the three months to June fell 9.6pc year-on-year, as sales plunged.

JLR, owned by India's Tata

Middle East turmoil slams the brakes on recovery at JLR

Motors, had started to recover after a cyber attack last year halted production.

But yesterday it said the number of vehicles sold to dealers in

the first quarter fell 9.2pc as the conflict disrupted markets.

It also followed a fire at a major supplier and the planned wind-down of outgoing Jaguar

models. Profits fell to £109m in the first quarter, down from £351m a year ago.

In July, JLR, which employs about 30,000 people in the UK,

said that it planned to cut hundreds of jobs to help recover £1.7bn in costs associated with the cyber attack.

The company has also faced a deterioration in its Chinese market and US tariffs.

But it has strong hopes for the coming launches of three Range Rover products and the Jaguar Type 01.

---

Page 65

	52-week	High	Low
Aeropoint & Defence
Actor Martin	1.00	+	89
AKD Spaniola	2.00	+	220
Channing Op.	620nd	+1	638
Grandf.	500nd	-2	271
Robo Moore	1025nd	-21	1570
Garcia	282	-1	311
Banks
Barron Gancaster	1394	+	1123
Bartolyn	1190d	+	1301
HEBC Hldgs	1525nd	+2	1581
Live Finance	13800	+60	13380
Lincoln Banking	710nd	+	1174
Metro Bank	1791	+3	1791
Netflix Group	750nd	+4	1221
Star-Chartered	2225d	-2	2248
TBC Bank	4410d	+4	5188
Beverages
Bear Bell	560	-3	710
Coco-Coco NBC	4830	+24	5170
Dragon	1752	+23	2121
Chemicals
Crude Metals	2000	+17	2022
Elements	1811nd	+1	1871
Johnson Mart	2180	-22	2280
Volume	410	-5	424
Construction & Materials
Butler's Beauty	822	+4	1001
Brendan	2001	+4	1761
Garval Group	280	+4	2001
Gratter Op.	1940	+5	1901
Enders	801	+1	1424
Kepler Group	2190d	+4	2404
Kiar Group	2601	+4	2601
Volation	479	+3	770
Electricity
Orla Op.	720	+1	918
SEX	24314d	-2	2101
Electronic & Electrical Equipment
Hanna	2744rd	-24	4678
Morgan Advanced	2011	-1	2001
Orsted Instruments	2950d	+24	3022
Revolver	5243	-10	5435
Equity-Investment Instruments
3-Infrastructure	391	+1	2011
Abertech Serv Cos	7735d	+8	7706
AJ Bell	410	-1	643
Alliance #15or	1380	+3	1588
Allianz Tech.	736	+8	758
Astrakis India	2571	-1	2801
AW Global Pool	294	+1	2751
Baillar 507 Japan	1672	-2	1586
Baillar 507 US	282	+7	2801
Banana Ina Fat	154nd	+1	1541
BH Stores	421	-1	4821

	52-week	High	Low
Caprianna Credit	75	74	84
Cashless Spro	200nd	+1	2041
DMANN/Milling	88	7	1048
BH Greater Eur	318	+4	424
Buckee	1570d	+8	1572
Caledona Inc.	307	+1	428
City of London IT	200nd	-1	597
Epic Inv Trust	840	-3	801
Epic Watch	2021	+3	2901
Euro Del Co.	200nd	+2	2401
FAC Inv Trust	344	+1	2811
Fidelity China	2021	-1	2221
Fidelity Emp	1478	+14	1502
Fidelity Eur	444	+1	444
Fidelity Spec Ind	475	+1	475
Fredery Olds Tot	318	+1	318
Fredery Olds	87	+1	84
GFP Hlts Inc	82nd	-1	83
Global Smaller	104nd	+1	1871
Greencoat UK	1010d	-3	1101
Heckman's	3475	+40	3475
Heckman's Sim Co.	880	+1	587
Heckman's Trust	3000	+15	3000
HQ Capital Trust	400	+4	500
HCJ, Inc	1371	-1	1391
ICG Enterprises	1402d	+6	1020
Invesco Asia	4821	+1	319
JPM America	1200nd	+8	1200
JPM Grouping Markets	100nd	+1	1901
JPM Euro Gas	832	-1	650
JPM Japan IT	800	+6	650
Jujiler Fund	1820d	+1	1801
Law Defensive	1507	+1	1378
MBO	2001	+2	2841
Mercantile IT	2871	+2	288
Merchants Trust	1774d	-1	685
Medic Ventures	584	+51	688
Medic Inv Fst	1840d	+4	1038
Morgan Select	4838	+34	5038
Murray Inv Fst	1004nd	-1	1024
Murray Inv Fst	2704d	+1	371
Net design Private Duty	1400d	+8	1502
Next Energy Solar	48nd	-1	754
Nevery One	2181	-1	2091
Oakley Capital Inc	524	-1	576
Pacific Horizon	1116	+12	1252
Parkman Infra	1124	+1	1104
Parkman Intl	404	+21	4671
Partners Group	410	-1	942
Patra Private	604	+6	642
Peering Square	3800d	-28	5208
Personal Asset IT	501	-1	557
Polar Cap St	354	+3	2041
Polar Cap Tech	680	+8	7331
Polter Brown	800	+23	964
Renewables Intra	75nd	-2	791
RIT Cap Partners	2625	-1	2658
Schroder Asia	842	+4	688
Schroder Oriental	400	+51	400
Scot America Inv.	561nd	-4	573
Scottish Mortgage	1440	+24	1545

TOP RISERS
	CLOSING PRICE	DAILY CHANGE
Savills
	108bn	+0.91%
Bank
	105.8p	+6.01%
Lion Finance
	13,380p	+5.19%
Vistry
	276.6p	+5.09%
Costals
	52-week	High	Low
Securities Econ Infra	80-nd	+1	8711
Specialty	167	+1	1001
Singapore Eur.	301	+21	3582
Namibian	158	+1	1161
Intercon Enter.	726	+4	1648
First Capital Yantra	441	+51	4388
JPM Grouping Markets	100-nd	+1	1901
JPM Euro Gas	832	-1	650
JPM Japan IT	800	+6	650
Jujiler Fund	1820d	+1	1801
Law Defensive	1507	+1	1378
MBO	2001	+2	2841
Mercantile IT	2871	+2	288
Merchants Trust	1774d	-1	685
Medic Ventures	584	+51	688
Medic Inv Fst	1840d	+4	1038
Morgan Select	4838	+34	5038
Murray Inv Fst	1004nd	-1	1024
Murray Inv Fst	2704d	+1	371
Net design Private Duty	1400d	+8	1502
Next Energy Solar	48nd	-1	754
Nevery One	2181	-1	2091
Oakley Capital Inc.	524	-1	576
Pacific Horizon	1116	+12	1252
Parkman Infra	1124	+1	1104
Parkman Intl	404	+21	4671
Partners Group	410	-1	942
Patra Private	604	+6	642
Peering Square	3800d	-28	5208
Personal Asset IT	501	-1	557
Polar Cap St	354	+3	2041
Polar Cap Tech	680	+8	7331
Polter Brown	800	+23	964
Renewables Intra	75nd	-2	791
RIT Cap Partners	2625	-1	2658
Schroder Asia	842	+4	688
Schroder Oriental	400	+51	400
Scot America Inv.	561nd	-4	573
Scottish Mortgage	1440	+24	1545

TOP FALLERS
	CLOSING PRICE	DAILY CHANGE
Autodupants
	2756p	-6.78%
Pan African
	107p	-5.64%
GlobalData
	82.5p	-5.06%
Rio Tinto
	7166p	-4.77%
Freeatillo
	2873p	-4.74%
Top FALLERS
	CLOSING PRICE	DAILY CHANGE
Autodupants
	2756p	-6.78%
Pan African
	107p	-5.64%
GlobalData
	82.5p	-5.06%
Rio Tinto
	7166p	-4.77%
Freeatillo
	2873p	-4.74%

	52-week	High	Low
Agri-Border Group	620+	+4	620+
Bloombury	441nd	+14	472
Informa	821nd	+11	850+
Informa	711	+1	651
Many Group	2034nd	+1	210
Nuclam	1182nd	-1	1328
Nuclam	2441nd	-80	3420
Richmond Group	491	-1	770+
ROV	340+	-21	471+
Mining
Anglo American	3011	+42	4220
Ambiguate	2758	+273	4400
Embancur Mining	4159	+178	5290
PepsiCo	2972nd	+42	4448
Common	5001	+2	410
Mechanical Mining	824	-24	808+
Pan African Resources	87	+4	100+
Rio Paso	7163rd	+308	8300
PACIFIC FINANCE
Admiral Op	3994	+48	3990
Bloomby	5503	-1	5298
Marine	1765d	+8	1888
Limousine Hldgs	591nd	-2	594
Q & Gm Producers
BP	1525nd	+4	1830+
Ensignum	7051	+8	1528
Huakua Energy	3444d	-8	3191
Hunting	482	+4	531
Mass Energy	3371	+4	3001+
Brent	3206rd	+34	3560
Oil Segment & Services
Petrol Quit	2011	-1	2011
Pharmaceuticals & Biotechnology
AutoChemic	5710nd	+6	5740
Conus	2254	-2	2170
CSN	1851nd	+21	2288
Halden	3574nd	-2	4101+
Harva Pharma	5643nd	+4	5851
Oxford Nanopore	1001	+1	211
Rench Brewster	5143d	+2	6001+
Lead Solar
Big Metal Op	8201	+4	1180
Bridol Lead	4371	+1	4441
Convent London	2088	+2	2148

	52-week	High	Low
Gamma	7761	+2	7720
Guamma	1671	+1	1741
Cayman	2811	+8	2682
Capra	1641	+1	1741
Interco Op	5841	+3	5840
In Allengation Op	1821	+2+	2691
Johnson Service Op	1471	-1	1701
Michael Page	1951	+1	2021
Wine Group	2004d	+1+	210
Randall Initial	3014nd	+5+	3001
RD Group	7301	+4	7401
Derco	273	+4	2041
Okina	2801	+1	2871
Texas Preterm	8001	+8	7141
W.A.G.	1081	-1	1081
Pathology Research & Industries
Amberell Top	810	+8	830
CB GROUP	332	+5	258
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66

Daily Mail

RACING

NEWBURY (B)

3.00 QUART, DOWN APPRENTICE HANDICAP (S) (F) 1,000 added (C), 3,767.1m (R) (S)

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ATHLETICS: EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS

Daily Mail Sport

67

Keely cruises into final

he'd rival takes a tumble

KEELY HODGKINSON kept her bid for a European 800 metres hat-trick on track on a dramatic afternoon which saw her main rival Audrey Werro take a tumble — before being reinstated for the final.

Hodgkinson, European 800m gold medal winner in 2022 and 2024, won the second semi-final in 1min 57.38sec, holding off Pemke Broeders-Bol to safely advance to one of the most eagerly awaited events of the week tonight.

It was a far more serene race than the opening semi, which was dominated by Werro before she hit the deck on the final bend.

Werro picked herself up to stumble over the finish line and a successful appeal means the 22-year-old, who holds this year's world lead, will be on the start line.

Hodgkinson was relieved to avoid the chaos and said: 'You can't worry about what happened to other people, but I hope she's OK.'

Another 1.57, so I'm happy. The excitement makes me excited. I love a good challenge and I hope for a clean race with no falling over and no wind.'

Werro set the third-fastest time in history when beating Hodgkinson at the Blackhollin Diamond League in June and had looked in ominous form in her semi-final as she led from the outset, before the shock twist approaching the home straight.

Initial replays appeared to show the Swiss claping her own leg but a new angle revealed the slightest of contacts between her right foot and the left hand of France's Anais Bourgoin, which affected Werro's stride.

T was feeling really great until the last moment but unfortunately something happened and I was on the ground one second after, Werro said.

A statement from the organisers confirmed the reason for the reinstatement was 'an unintentional touch' involving Werro and Bourgoin. They added: 'The incident resulted in the fall of two athletes, Werro and (Gabija) Galvydyte. Having reviewed the circumstances, the referee decided to qualify both athletes in accordance with the applicable rules.'

Scot Jemma Reekie took advantage of Werro's slip to cross the line first and advance in 1:58.61.

'It just shows anything can happen in championship racing and I'm just glad I switched on enough to move around it,' she said. 'I heard somebody go down but I didn't know who it was, I was just focused on getting to the finish line. That was a carefree

PAUL MARTIN

in Birmingham

Jemma. I didn't panic. I'm really proud as that was really tough and there were some fallers in there. Having had a fall, I know how much that can throw you so I just tried to stay calm.'

It marks a welcome return to a major championship final for the 28-year-old, who has had a testing spell since exiting at the semi-final stage of the 2024 Olympics.

'I had the equivalent of the twistles in gymnastics over the past few years,' she said.

'I had a mental block with the semi-finals which links back to the disappointment in Paris. But we've broken that so hopefully I can go out and run free.'

'It is going to be an amazing final. It will be a huge stepping stone for me to get back to being competitive with those girls.'

Elsewhere, Morgan Lake was delighted to bounce back from her Commonwealth Games disappointment by securing a place in the women's high jump final.

The 28-year-old national record holder, at her sixth European Championships having debuted aged 17, was unable to clear three attempts at 1.82m in Glasgow but tweaks to her run-up led to a

much-improved display at the Alexander Stadium. She cleared her third shot at 1.91m to seal a spot in tomorrow's showpiece and hopes the best is yet to come.

'I feel this was such a key moment for me,' she said. 'All season I have been like, "I know I'm in shape, I don't know why it's not coming out".'

'We have made a few changes between Commonwealths and here with my run-up and it has just clicked and made such a difference. Commonwealths did not go well at all so this had to go well, it was the only option. Making the final is step one.'

TV: Women's 800m final, 9.45pm, LIVE on BBC One.

BEVERLEY

2.15 — NOT MY TYPE (T Marquand) 6-42nd(Fav) 1. Empress Princess 12-2. Flower Fountain 28-1 2. 6 ran. (M doggie) 1/4. 1/4. Tate 2.50. 1/20. 2.50. Ex. 3.75. 1. 18.00. CSF: 13.51.

2.45 — CONCERT PITCH (B Rajkumar) 8-1(F) 1. Lady Mary 15-22nd(Fav) 2. Mrs. Miss 12-1 3. 10 ran. (B Elman) 2/4. 2/4. Tate 1.50. 1.10. 1.70. 2.50. Ex. 4.90. 7c. 28.19. TT. 37.30. CSF: 4.97.

3.10 — GIRLS OF GOLD (W Yule) 11-2. Court Legend 8-1 2. Ariane Sky owner 7. 10 ran. (Craig Libbert) 2/4. 1/4. Tate 6.50. 2.20. 1.20. 1.30. Ex. 54.00. 7c. 85.81. TT. 109.40. CSF: 68.52. NR. Camel And Blues.

3.45 — SHAZANE (L Edmunds) 3-2 1. Cat To Action 18-1 2. Caution 18-1 3. 10 ran. (B Bowery) 1/4. 1/4. Tate: 4.50. 1.60. 4.00. 2.70. Ex. 51.40. 7c. 527.10. TT. 410.20. CSF: 58.22. NRs. Ingleby Archie, Squeeze.

4.15 — MARGLAIR (L Morris) 11-8F 1. Grey Table 3-1 2. Mr. Moonshine 9-42nd(Fav) 3. 5 ran. (Br M Prescott).

4% hd. Tate: 2.30. 1.30. 1.60. Ex. 6.50. TT. 11.10. CSF: 6.11. NR. Sickard&Screw. 4.45 — SARDIN GRACE (Shane Grey) 6-5F 1. Copper And Fine 8-1 2. Back From Sides 10-2 3. 10 ran. (B Bowery) 4/4. 2. Tate: 2.20. 1.10. 1.90. 2.10. Ex. 6.60. 7c. 39.81. TT. 40.50. CSF: 8.74.

Jackpot (1) 11-10. 12-pot (3) 60. LINGFIELD 3.20 — ALICE DE CLARE (J Peale) 11-1. Barbary Boy 9-2 2. Kearman 4-1(4)2nd(Fav) 2. Tate. (J Parthenon) 1/4. Tate: 4.00. 1.70. 2.50. 1.50. Ex. 41.30. 7c. 140.62. TT. 225.60. CSF: 35.81. NR. Kugler, Alive. 3.55 — HUMA BAREE (C Shepherd) 3-1(2)nd(Fav) 1. Brookstreak 9-2 2. Alison owner 3. 11 ran. (C Johnston) 1/4. 2. Tate: 4.00. 1.50. 1.50. 1.10. Ex. 22.60. 7c. 7.20. CSF: 17.00. NR. Brownshahawk. 4.29 — SPUT ELEVORS (J Callan) 7-2(2)nd(Fav) 1. Spirit Of Break 8-1 2. Cherla 8-1 3. 12 ran. (J Butler) 1/4. 1/4. Tate: 4.00. 1.50. 2.00. 2.70. Ex. 50.50. 7c. 167.39. TT. 259.60. CSF: 25.80. NR. Lawson.

RACING RESULTS

6.58 — MY MATE MACKLEY (C Bishop) 3-1(2)nd(Fav) 1. Pure Passion 10-2. Zataria 12-6F 2. 4 ran. (Adam Kirk) 2/4. 1/4. Tate: 4.00. 1.50. 2.00. Ex. 41.30. 7c. 140.62. TT. 61.90. CSF: 42.43. NR. Ex. 63.

7.24 — DORF MALE (R Hanks) 11-8F 1. Walking On Stars 7-2(2)nd(Fav) 2. Shangel La 4-1 3. 9 ran. (J & T Zataria) 1/4. 2. Tate: 2.30. 1.20. 1.30. 1.40. Ex. 6.90. 7c. 20.10. CSF: 6.50.

7.24 — DOLTAK DAVIUS (D Kearman) 12-1. Beautiful Effort 13-2. Viking Banks 10-1 3. 9 ran. (M Botto) 1/4. 1/4. Tate: 13.80. 3.30. 3.00. 3.00. Ex. 120.00. 7c. 972.94. TT. 1369.00. CSF: 68.73. NR. American Psycho. Pleasant 234.20. 12-pot (3) 10.

GALLISBURY 5.20 — THIGECOLLISBURUN Burdette Champion 3-2 1. Sydney Hole 11-8F 2. Kimoko Story 13-8(2)nd(Fav) 3. 6 ran. (J S Moore) 1/4. 2/4. Tate: 6.10. 2.00. 1.40. Ex. 13.70. 7c. 21.30. CSF: 11.14. NR. Decalogue.

RACING RESULTS

6.04 — FLOODING (O Murphy) owner 1. Tians Time 11-10(2nd(Fav) 2. All Angels 10-1 3. 9 ran. (M Botto) 1/4. 2/4. Tate: 2.00. 1.10. 1.30. Ex. 2.10. 7c. 2.50. 1.50.

6.34 — REFORMATION (O Murphy) 8-42nd(Fav) 1. Sennett's 9-3F 2. 3 ran. (A Bolding) 2. Tate: 3.20. 7.24 — SMINA STORM (R Shyeman) 2-3F 1. Candy 8-1(2)nd(Fav) 2. Orchard Hatches 18-1 3. 4 ran. (E Wolter) 1/4. Tate: 1.40. Ex. 2.50. TT. 6.90. CSF: 2.50. NR. Canter's Road.

7.24 — MURTYWOODING (A Redman) 9-2.1. Glorious 14-1 2. Livemithlight 14-1 3. 7 ran. (A Bolding) 2/4. 2/4. Tate: 3.00. 2.40. 5.00. Ex. 52.70. 7c. 653.70. TT. 509.40. CSF: 62.74. NR. Michl 7.60.

6.04 — SUPPLICATE (J Mitchell) 11-8(2nd(Fav) 1. Sudbury Hill 8-1 2. On The End 20-1 3. 4 ran. (R Hanks) 2/4. 1/4. Tate: 2.30. Ex. 9.50. TT. 32.80. CSF: 11.06. NRs. Akira, Minerva, Storm Point. Pleasant 1130.70. 12-pot 694.60.

WINDSOR

5.38 — MADMAN (David Egan) 8-1 1. Dark Alley 40-1 2. Maid in Devon 3-1F 3. 11 ran. (R Cook & J Bridger) 2/4. 1/4. Tate: 7.00. 1.90. 10.00. 1.70. Ex. 264.80. 7c. 882.17. TT. 1831.40. CSF: 228.79.

6.11 — WETHGAL (P Didelot) 10-2(2)nd(Fav) 1. Lyding Boy 10-1 2. LegendwithIsland 9-2 3. 11 ran. (S Cranley) 1/4. 2nd. Tate: 4.34. 1.20. 3.40. 2.00. Ex. 47.50. 7c. 193.40. CSF: 68.50. 7c. 44.21. NR. Pye.

4.41 — COLOUBRAND (H Deves) 12-6F 1. Knights Gold 8-1 2. Sigmoodle City 10-2 3. 8 ran. (S & E Cranley) 2/4. 1/4. Tate: 2.60. 1.20. 2.50. 2.40. 1/4. 1/4. 70. 7c. 66.60. TT. 95.80. CSF: 18.00.

7.11 — WATERFORD CASTLE (B Loughland) 4-6F 1. Partying 11-8(2)nd(Fav) 2. Sergei Breeze 24-1 3. 8 ran. (G Boughey) 1/4. 1/4. Tate: 1.70. 1.10. 1.30. Ex. 2.10. TT. 8.30. CSF: 1.67.

7.41 — CITY OF POETS (R Hanks) 4-1(2)nd(Fav) 1. Lee Court 5-1 2. 6. Major Pteye 10-3F 3. 8 ran. (J Tate) 2/4. Tate: 5.60. 1.70. 1.80. 1.40. Ex. 27.40. 7c. 73.18. TT. 71.80.

CSF: 24.47.

8.11 — ARAWALLI (Taylor Clyde) 11-2. Roller Man 8-1 2. Mythological Star 6-5F 2. 4 ran. (J Today) 1/4. 2/4. Tate: 6.50. Ex. 39.60. TT. 78.50. CSF: 36.90. Pleasant 235.00. 12-pot (3) 10.

TRAINERS (last 14 days) M Pleasant 2 wins from 3 runners (67%); C Appleby 10 from 24

(42%); Harry Charlton 3 from 8 (38%); H Candy 2 from 6 (33%).

JOCKEYS C R Lyons 2 from 5 (40%); Oisin Orr 11 from 33 (33%); Hector Crouch 9 from 28 (32%); Grace McEntee 2 from 7 (29%).

Daily Mail RACING SERVICES

UK/RISH COMMENTARY AND RESULTS

09016 09 29 39

FOR RACING TIPS CALL

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Only one 65g person per year. Mentors company's network access charge. Taster information updated at: Town daily, 1P. Spoke, Hwy. 1503 272-1008.

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68

Daily Mail Sport

CRICKET

by Richard Gibson

HE has already outdone his famous father. Now he is ready to take on more England all-rounder royalty.

In scoring his first professional hundred on Tuesday, four months after his 18th birthday, Rocky Flintoff trumped dad Andrew, whose own precocity saw him reach three figures aged 19 and play in a Test match at 20. Flintoff's 65-ball hundred for Lancashire against Somerset swelled into 123 from 76 and was part of a bulldozing performance that teed up a home One-Day Cup quarter-final today against Ben Stokes and Durham.

And after the latest addition to a remarkable set of batting landmarks over the past two years, David Lloyd, the England coach when Flintoff senior was given his head against South Africa in 1998, believes history should be repeated.

"Bumble" commentated on Lancashire's 174-run win at Taunton for radio and remarked on the "very similar" mannerisms to his dad while Flintoff was at the crease. Particularly striking, he noted, was a short-arm jab of a pull shot.

"I just think he could be fast-tracked. He's got everything," Lloyd said. "When you look at a player, you have to make a judgment as to what standard they are going to be."

"England have been pretty good in recent years in identifying a talent and stretching them, pushing them forward. They can do that with Flintoff."

Indeed, a year to the day after a 19-year-old Andrew Flintoff hit 117 in a County Championship match versus Hampshire in Southampton, he was making his debut against Allan Donald, Shaun Pollock and Jacques Kallis at Trent Bridge.

Days after turning 20, he began 1998 with a hundred for England Lions in a low-scoring win over Kenya and was in the one-day side from that summer onwards.

Rocky is arguably further ahead in that regard, crashing ten fours and seven sixes to help Lancashire to 443 for six — their best-ever List A total — on their

Chip off the old block: Flintoff celebrates his ton for Lancashire against Somerset

GETTY IMAGES

ROCKY

ON THE RAMPAGE

Flintoff Jnr has already blitzed his dad's records... now Stokes is in his sights

way to second place in Group A and setting up today's last-eight clash against Stokes' Durham in Manchester.

Eighteen months ago, he became England Lions' youngest centurion, taking his dad's record, in a tour match versus a Cricket Australia XI. It followed Rocky's achievement of becoming the youngest to reach three figures for England's

Under 19s — aged 16 years and 102 days — against Sri Lanka in the summer of 2024.

However, body issues clearly run in the family. It was stress fractures of the back that held back Freddie's initial years in the men's game and Rocky has been prevented from bowling by a stress fracture of the pelvis.

Restricted to only one of his two suits, it meant he began the

2026 season as second reserve batsman in Lancashire's County Championship XI.

And by the time the ongoing failures of the top six might have presented him with an opportunity of a first-class appearance for two years, he was absent on England U19 duty.

Having found form, however, he is unlikely to be languishing

in the club's second XI when a Division Two campaign, in which Lancashire are second bottom, resumes next week.

First, there is the chance to lock horns with Stokes, whose own presence has sprinkled some stardust on a One-Day Cup competition cast as second rate by the presence of the Hundred, but which remains a resounding hit with this country's county followers.

Stokes, 35, would undoubtedly have commanded a lucrative Hundred salary had he not opted to sit out this part of the summer to preserve himself for Test cricket, prior to announcing his surprise international retirement.

With only those entered into the Hundred draft system able to participate, it thrust him against the country's next-best white-ball cricketers and exposed some emerging talents to the skills of a true modern great.

Last week, Stokes was on the rampage, taking 43 off 27 balls sent down by an Essex attack incorporating Charlie Bennett, 20, and Mackenzie Jones, 21.

Sussex, who Stokes pummelled for an unbeaten 73 off 51 deliveries, included 18-year-old Freddie Price. James Minto, another teenager, opened the bowling for Durham in that match.

The ECB's 50-over competition catalyses the development of the country's best-emerging talent. Among them, there is one established name continuing to make one for himself.

TV: Lancashire v Durham, 7am, LIVE on Lancashire Cricket YouTube account.

Gay draws blank on return

ENGLAND opener Emilio Gay prepared for next week's first Test at Headingley with a 12-ball duck for a Professional County Club Select XI against Pakistan. Gay, batting for the first time since retiring hurt with shoulder trouble during a one-day game for Durham seven days ago, was squared up by Mohammed Abbas and caught low at second slip by Salman Agha.

Abbas then removed James Rew, another of England's Test debutants this summer, for just four, caught behind poking at one that left him.

But Sussex opener Tom Haines replied with a 30-ball fifty and there were also half-centuries for Middlesex all-rounder Caleb Falconer, Northants' Saif Zaib and Surrey No10 Matthew Fisher, who faced just 53 balls for his 62 not out in a total of 305. Abbas and Mohammad Ali both finished with three wickets. Pakistan, who on Wednesday toured the facilities at Crystal Palace's training ground over the road from Beckenham Cricket Club, closed on 44 without loss.

LAWRENCE BOOTH

Another fine mess for Jon

JON RAHM'S Ryder Cup future is in doubt again after European golf bosses tightened their regulations around players hopping between tours.

The DP World Tour has recently warned members of both circuits, like Rahm, of the likelihood of fines next season if they tee up in conflicting events.

Those sanctions were parked in 2026 for a cohort of LIV rebels, Rahm included, which was contingent on them agreeing to settle fines already accrued. In Rahm's case that meant paying close to £2million, but having previously accused the DP World Tour of 'extortion', it will

GOLF

be intriguing to see how he reacts to the reintroduction of the measure in 2027. It could be a moot point if he quits LIV with the Spaniard considering walking away two years before his contract is up. If he stays with LIV, which at best will have ten events next year and far smaller prize funds, he risks six-figure fines from the DP World Tour each time he plays. A refusal to pay could cost him his tour membership and eligibility for next year's Ryder Cup.

RIATH AL-SAMARRAI

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Page 69

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70 Daily Mail Sport FOOTBALL

Villa's giant keen has fired himself to front of queue

BRIAN MADJO needed only 17 minutes to change Aston Villa's outlook for the upcoming season. In that time he bullied Willan Pacho, one of the best markers in the world, and gave Marquinhos a fright too.

He had six attempts on goal and scored perhaps the most difficult, a far-post volley after outsmusing Pacho. Against Paris Saint-Germain, that would be a fair night's work for any centre forward. For a 17-year-old making his competitive debut, it made the world sit up and take notice.

Even though they won the Super Cup, PSG were some way short of peak condition. Yet PSG are still PSG. For Madjo to make an impression like that was highly impressive and he is now leading the race to start the Premier League opener at Brighton on August 23, with Ollie Watkins not due back with the squad until this weekend.

Madjo and fellow youngster George Hemmings, who was also impressive, have lifted the mood around Villa Park.

Though supporters trust boss Unai Emery completely, they are frustrated at UEFA financial rules that have effectively forced them to sell Morgan Rogers, Youri Tielemans and Lucas Digne.

With Ezri Konsa also a target for Arsenal and Emi Martinez and Watkins only returning to training this weekend, there was creeping apprehension among some fans. In one night in Salzburg, Madjo blew that away.

WHAT DO HIS TEAM-MATES THINK?

MADJO joined Villa for £10million in January, but his registration was initially blocked. The teenager is a Luxembourg international and FIFA regulations forbid overseas transfers of players under 18.

Yet Villa got the ruling overturned on appeal and Madjo, born in Enfield, north London, was cleared to play this summer.

Skipper John McGinn posted 'English player allowed to play in England #freemadjo' on Instagram, a sign of how well respected Madjo has become among the squad.

'He has obviously had to be very patient until he could play,' said defender Tycoe Mings. 'That says a lot about his character. He is very young and very strong. Mentally, he is able to deal with setbacks.'

'He's a tough person to defend against. I think he is about 100kg. He is a big old boy! He has got a very high ceiling.'

'He has trained with us for a long time, so when he eventually got his chance to play, he was ready. He knew our system, he knew how to press. I presume he watched a lot of Ollie Watkins and understood how we play. I've had a few chats with him in terms of what he's about to go into.'

'The manager is big on what we do off the ball, probably more than what we do on the ball. Ollie's a great person to watch, because of his work-rate and what he brings to the team.'

McGinn added: 'He [Madjo] has been through a lot. He's not been able to play for six months to a year and has handled that amazingly. He

By TOM COLLOMOSSE

has kept himself in good shape. It would have been very easy for him to put his head down after those missed chances, but good strikers get themselves in those positions and he's going to be a big player for us this season.'

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?

SPOTTING the potential in Madjo and Hemmings, Emery deliberately loaded Villa's pre-season schedule with fixtures. PSG were their seventh opponents of the summer programme, which Villa will complete against Borussia Mönchengladbach on Saturday.

Emery wanted his youngsters to grow accustomed to his style and tactical demands and on the evidence of the Super Cup, the plan has worked.

Madjo has now scored five times in pre-season, with a brace against Walsall before also finding the net against Real Sociedad and the Indonesia All Stars.

His rise makes it even likelier that Villa will listen to offers for Tammy Abraham, even though they paid £18m for the former England striker only seven months ago.

Villa continue to track Chelsea's Nicolas Jackson and could move in this window, though Madjo's displays could make Emery wonder if he needs two more forwards.

Even though he has represented Luxembourg three times, they were only friendlies, meaning Madjo could play for England, for whom he has nine caps at Under-17 level. Expect him to be chosen for the forthcoming age-group squads.

He is strong for his age and loves a physical duel. Yet there is work to do, particularly on his touch.

The good news is that Emery has an outstanding track record of improving strikers.

As he prepares to meet Villa, you suspect Brighton boss Fabian Hurzeler will be making plans to contain this exciting teenager.

ADVERTISEMENT

FOOTBALL IS BACK, WITH 1500

Sky Sports is the home of domestic club football in the UK & Ireland and will broadcast over 1,500 live matches across the Premier League, WSL, EFL and Scottish Premiership this season.

In the Premier League alone, Sky Sports will show at least 215 live matches. It gets first pick of matches each week and will continue to show multiple games at 2pm on Sundays across multiple weekends, promising headline fixtures throughout the season.

The Premier League kicks off a week later than the 20/26 season to help players recover following the 2026 World Cup. Defending champions Arsenal will kick off the 2026/27 Premier League season at home to Coventry on Friday 21 August, live on Sky Sports. The curtain-raiser will see Mikel Arteta's Gunners – fresh from celebrating their first title triumph in 22 years – play host to Frank Langford's Championship winners in an 8pm kick-off at Emirates Stadium. Arsenal then face tricky tests at Aston Villa and home to Xabi Alonso's Chelsea in their next two fixtures.

There will be six Premier League games live on Sky Sports across the opening round, including Ariston Inside's first match in charge of Liverpool. The Reds go to Newcastle on Sunday 23 August in a 4.30pm kick-off. Liverpool then have showdowns

with Man City and Arsenal in October before taking on rivals Manchester United and Everton back-to-back in November.

London derbass Brentford vs Spurs (Saturday 22 August, 5.30pm) and Fulham vs Chelsea (Monday 24 August, 6pm) are also among the highlights of the opening round of fixtures, all live on Sky Sports. Spurs fans – who have seen their side finish 17th in the past two seasons – will also have a hard end to the campaign in the back of their minds. Their final five matches include a trip to Arsenal (Saturday 1 May), home games against Chelsea (Saturday 8 May) and Manchester United (Sunday 23 May), with their final match of the season at Aston Villa on Sunday 30 May.

Man City's new era without Pep Guardiola begins at the Elfrast Stadium against Bournemouth at 2pm on Sunday 23 August. However, their first meetings with last season's top five are all away from home.

Championship play-off winners Hull City welcome Manchester United to the MKM Stadium on their Premier League return at 12.30pm on Saturday 22 August, while fellow promoted side to watch begin at Portman Road with Sunderland at 3pm. Everton vs Conference League winners Crystal Palace and Nottingham Forest vs Leeds are scheduled as 3pm kick-offs on Saturday 22 August, with Brighton vs

Europa League holders Aston Villa on Sunday 23 August at 2pm, live on Sky Sports.

Over Christmas and the New Year, clubs will have at least a 60-hour break between fixtures. This is in keeping with commitments made to clubs to address the congested festive schedule within the expanded international calendar.

With more live games, broader access and greater flexibility, Sky Sports is positioning the 2026/27 season as a year of non-stop football.

There will also be a fuller schedule of Premier League fixtures on Boxing Day this season.

With the season concluding on Sunday 30 May, all 10 Premier League fixtures will kick off simultaneously. Every fixture from the decisive final day will be shown live, setting up a potentially dramatic finish one week before the 2027 Champions League final.

The Scottish Premiership has already set the tone. All six matches across the opening weekend

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TENNIS | Daily Mail Sport 71

Tribunal for hotshot striker

LIVERPOOL and Arsenal are heading to a tribunal after failing to agree compensation for 16-year-old Vincent Joseph. The highly rated striker, who had appeared for Liverpool's Under 18s, decided to leave the club last month, despite the fact they offered him a scholarship. He declined the offer amid interest from the likes of Manchester United, Chelsea, Bayern Munich and Borussia Dortmund. However, it is Arsenal who have won the race for his signature. They have since been in talks with Liverpool

By SIMON JONES

over compensation, but have been unable to find common ground and the pair are now set for a tribunal. The last teenager to leave Liverpool for another Premier League side was Isaac Moran. The 17-year-old England youth international joined Newcastle this year and signed a professional contract in March. A tribunal resulted in a seven-figure fee being ordered, with the settlement for the midfielder having the potential to reach £5m. The

battle for Premier League talents has become costly and cut-throat in recent years. Liverpool angered Chelsea when they took Rio Ngumoha from them last year. The England international, 17, moved to Liverpool because he believed there was a better pathway to first-team football, leaving Chelsea in September 2024 and signing his first pro contract a year later. A tribunal decided Liverpool must pay £2.8m for him, which could rise to £4m. Chelsea will also be owed 20 per cent of any profit if Ngumoha is sold.

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MATCHES LIVE ON SKY SPORTS

were shown live, with up to 60 games set to be on Sky Sports across the SPFL this year. The curtain-raiser saw Rangers held to be on the 17-year-old by Dundee United in Derek McInnes, a 17-year-old match in charge, while there were a 17-year-old McLeish's St Mirren. Aberdeen against the turners-up Hearts, newly promoted by the 17-year-old and Motherwell over Conference League, and the 17-year-old Hibernian across the opening weekend. The league looks more competitive than the following the dramatic final-day show: the 17-year-old Celtic triumph over challenges from the 17-year-old Celtic and Rangers will make the 17-year-old from match of the season on the 17-year-old. The 17-year-old lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old, and lives in the 17-year-old.

the promotion hopefuls and former Premier League names; you'll be able to choose to follow every match's story across the Championship, League One and League Two.

September's EFL selections show the range of the first three games. Stoke City face Norwich City, New Burnley meet Middlesbrough in midweek Championship fixtures. Birmingham City's meeting with Wolves, Sheffield United's clash with Wolves, and Wolves against West Bromwich Albion bring former spotlight clubs and regional rivalries back to the spotlight. Further down the pyramid, the take on AFC Wimbledon. Stevenage face Norwich. Wimbledon meet MK Doria. These are the fixtures with coverage usually reserved for the standout club stories in League Two. The 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old.

The 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old.

Trophy with their triumph over Stockport County. Sky Bet EFL fixtures will be broadcast on either a main Sky Sports channel or Sky Sports+, with all televised fixtures also available on streaming service NOW.

Women's football coverage will expand significantly too. Sky Sports is set to show 163 WSL matches, including 108 exclusively. The league grows from 12 clubs to 14 this season. London City Lionesses open the campaign against Manchester United on Friday 4 September. The ambitious London club brings added interest after signing two-time Bishop of the former Alexia Putellas and former England Intercontinental United, having been Earnest.

All players are to remain their own, but they are not to be able to play over the last 18 months. The 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old, the 17-year-old.

Crying shame: Draper's tears after defeat in Montreal

SKY SPORTS

Jack: Injuries have taken my fighting spirit

THE injury demons have destroyed Jack Draper's body over the last 18 months and now they are breaking his spirit.

For the second week in a row, the former world No4 ended a first-round defeat with his body creaking, his mind scrambled and his game in ruins. Afterwards he admitted: 'It's got to a point with me where it's taken one of my biggest qualities: my fighting spirit.'

It is excruciating to watch Draper play tennis at the moment. Goodness knows how it must feel for the man himself. He described last week's loss to Terence Atmane in Montreal as 'rock bottom' and it was tough to see much progress in yesterday's 6-3, 7-5 defeat by Martin Landaluce in Cincinnati.

There were 12 double faults and a collapse from 5-2 in the second set. Six set points came and went. The context is Draper has spent much of the last 16 months battling bone bruising in his left arm and, more recently, tendinitis in his right knee.

That left arm could do little more than roll over serves at the end and that knee was barely bending as he walked through the last two games.

It was dispiritingly similar to how the match ended in Montreal and if there were no tears this time, it was because Draper has accepted this is his grim new reality.

'It's the same as last week: the way I'm usually able to fight for every ball, it's just missing,' Draper said. 'After last week, I put in a lot of hard work to play a bit better but from an internal point of view, it's a difficult place to be right now.'

'You're battling and trying to pump stuff up and give you energy,

but it suppresses you down. It's got to a point with me where it's taken one of my biggest qualities: my fighting spirit.'

Draper has tried rest and rehab. He has changed his strings and racket — something, he said, 'I desperately don't want to do' — but nothing is working.

'There are no right answers,' he said. 'There's a level of chronic pain that's always with you. That starts to go away but the arm is linked to the elbow. It's linked to bicep tendinitis, it's linked to so many nerves around that area. So when you have an injury to that area, the whole arm is kind of lit up.'

'When you've got that on your playing arm... this is my life, this is my career, you know?'

'For a normal person, they would have six months off and it might recover. The truth is I'm playing tennis and so it's not as simple as taking time off and it's going to go, because it doesn't. I've tried it.'

The world No143 now faces the prospect of having to go through qualifying for the US Open — an event in which he made the semi-finals only two years ago.

'It's the fatigue in my mind and my body from a long period of setbacks and struggle and isolation, Draper added. 'The level of my fall from where I was last year and the amount of things I'm having to change in my tennis... the mountain seems very, very big.'

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72 Daily Mail Sport FOOTBALL

When mild-mannered Carrick begs for signings TEN times in 15 minutes, you know it's getting desperate...

MICHAEL CARRICK strides into a plush conference room here at Carton House, the five-star spa hotel which has been home to Manchester United all week, with a big smile on his face. There is a lot for the United boss to be happy about, after all.

Back home his daughter, Louise, has collected her A-Level results and, here in Ireland, the late returns of Kobbie Mainoo, Marcus Rashford and Lisandro Martinez following the World Cup have added fresh dynamism to a squad that overcame Leeds on penalties at Croke Park on Wednesday.

Carrick, unlike his predecessor Ruben Amorim, is level-headed. When tough questions come his way, club chiefs know he will not rock the boat like we used to see from Amorim — with whom United will be reunited tomorrow when they face his AC Milan side in Poland.

It is why United were comfortable throwing open their doors to Amazon filmmakers for this season's 'All or Nothing' behind-the-scenes documentary.

But don't mistake his calmness for ambivalence. Carrick is determined to win, too.

'This has been a summer where Chelsea, Manchester City and Tottenham have spent north of £100million. Even promoted Coventry and Ipswich have spent more than United. And Carrick's message here to those upstairs was crystal clear.

'It can't be for the sake of it, but of course, we want to improve, we need to improve,' Carrick says. 'It's something we're working towards, for sure.'

So far only Youri Tielemans, Andrey Santos and back-up goalkeeper Karl Darlow have arrived. Tyman Thompson, an £8m pick-up from Spurs, is one for the future.

'Karl, Andrey and Youri are exactly what we hoped, exactly what we expected in every way,' he says. 'Andrey, for such a young man to come in the way he's come in, his character and his personality are a dream.'

But Carrick knows he needs more. United still need a left back — there have been two failed approaches for Newcastle's Lewis

NATHAN SALT in Dublin

Hall this summer — and another central midfielder.

By the time this 15-minute conversation was over, Carrick had referenced a need to 'push' in the transfer market ten times.

'We've got a pretty good balance when you lay the squad out, but of course we would like more,' he said. 'We need to keep pushing for more.'

'There's one or two areas we feel there's the possibility to improve, but that needs to be something we can do that makes us better and improves the group, whether that's quality or a bit of depth.'

'That's something we've got to manage. That's pretty obvious.'

Director of football Jason Wilcox is here in Ireland and remains in constant communication with Carrick. Given their frugal approach to the summer so far, which has seen United fail to land Elliot Anderson, Morgan Rogers and others, can United seriously contend for the Premier League title this season?

'You've got to have the belief, you've got to be going into the

Keep calm: but Carrick is eager to improve his squad GETTY IMAGES

season thinking we can achieve something special,' says Carrick, reluctant to commit to any bold proclamation. 'Don't be going into a season thinking this could be a struggle. We've got to set out to really achieve something.'

'We've got the potential to achieve something really special. I'm not hiding from the fact and we should aim to do that.'

'I'm not going to make any crazy predictions, but on the back of what we have done, I keep saying it, that gives us the confidence to move forward. How quickly we keep moving forward, that is the challenge.'

There remains a question mark over Rashford and the prospect of him playing his first minutes for United tomorrow since 2024, when Amorim left him out in the cold. United have long been open

to moving on the £325,000-a-week attacker as part of a plan to reduce their wage bill. They have also been in the market for a left winger all summer.

Barcelona passed up their option to sign Rashford after he spent last season on loan with the Spanish champions, so he is back at United and training well.

'He's a very good player, Marcus, and if you're going to have a career over 10 or 15 years, there's going to be times when things go in a different direction,' says Carrick, who did not rule out the possibility of Rashford leaving.

'There's ups and downs and that doesn't define you as a one-off judgment. It's what happens over time and now we are in a positive place as a group, and Marcus can offer us so much. He has done (in the past) and he

HOW MUCH YOUR CLUB HAS SPENT

1. Chelsea	£348.6m
2. Tottenham	£228.1m
3. Man City	£151.4m
4. Arsenal	£150.8m
5. Newcastle	£137.7m
6. Nottm Forest	£113.2m
7. Ipswich	£109.2m
8. Brighton	£103m
9. Bournemouth	£95m
10. Coventry	£92m
11. Aston Villa	£90.1m
12. Liverpool	£88.5m
13. MAN UTD	£83.1m
14. Everton	£84.4m
15. Fulham	£73.8m
16. Leeds	£71.5m
17. Brentford	£71.3m
18. Hull	£65.8m
19. Sunderland	£43.4m
20. Crystal Palace	£22m

can do again, so in that respect, it's quite exciting.'

There's a return for Mainoo, too. Carrick kept in touch with the midfielder all summer, checking in as he went through the World Cup without playing at all.

There are no concerns, though — in fact, Carrick believes Mainoo is ready to take the Premier League by storm.

'The biggest thing for me is Kobbie's in a really good place,' he adds. 'He has come home and is ready for a big season.'

But there are lingering concerns over squad depth, with United back in Europe this season.

'We're not naive, we know what we're going into,' Carrick concludes, pressed on the fact that United are likely to play 15 to 20 more games than last season's historically low total of 40.

'But we feel we're a stronger group now than we were last season, so we've just got to capitalise on that.'

By HENRY CLARK

THE TEAM TO BEAT WILL BE...

IT'S hard to look past WEST HAM. The Hammers have kept the core of their squad together from last season, including Jarrod Bowen, who could obliterate every Championship goalscoring record. Manager Nuno Espirito Santo knows how to get out of this division too, meaning they edge out WOLVES as title favourite. Wolves' new boss Cesar Peixoto is untested on these shores, but can call on experienced operator Kieran Trippier and returning fan favourite Raul Jimenez.

THAT'S BORING — WHAT ABOUT AN OUTSIDE BET?

OK, fair enough. How about defeated play-off finalists MIDDLESBROUGH, who have been aggressive in the transfer market following their tidy windfall

What to look out for as Championship returns

from Morgan Rogers' big-money move to Chelsea. Will Lankshear is the kind of striker defenders will dread playing against on a cold night at the Riverside. SOUTHAMPTON start the season with a four-point deficit owing to their Spygate shenanigans, but should still go well if they keep on the right side of the law. A word, too, for Philippe Clement's NORWICH, the division's best team in 2026. There is a real feel-good factor at Carrow Road right now.

WHO'S THE NEXT UNKNOWN STAR TO EMERGE?

MOHAMED TOURE'S hat-trick on debut for Norwich following his move from Danish side Randers was a sign of things to come. The Australian striker got a

goal or assist every 58 minutes last season, earning comparisons to Mark Viduka. Keep an eye on Watford's OTHMANE MAAMMA too. The Moroccan has a real bag of tricks.

THE TEAM YOU SHOULD BUY A TICKET TO WATCH IS...

THERE'S just something about the Racecourse Ground and late goals. It has been a quiet summer for WREXHAM — the quietest in terms of incomings since Hollywood rolled into town — but drama is never in short supply in North Wales. Meanwhile, a bouncing St Andrews is one of the best places to watch football, but a strong start is imperative for BIRMINGHAM boss Chris Davies after an underwhelming 2025-26 season.

IT'S GOING TO BE A LONG SEASON FOR... LINCOLN and BOLTON. The Imps were one of the stories of English football last season, but this feels like one hurdle too many to overcome after losing manager Michael Skubala to Bristol City and key man Jack Moylan to Cardiff this summer. Bolton simply lack quality and know-how to compete at this level.

WHO ELSE IS BATTLING TO BEAT THE DROP?

IS this the year WATFORD finally pay the price for their hire 'em, fire 'em policy with managers? If Alessio Dionisi makes it to the end of the year it really will be a Christmas miracle. Nathan Jones did well to keep CHARLTON up last season, but their summer business has been flat and we could see them slide towards trouble. Tony Mowbray also has his work cut out going back in at BLACKBURN.

TV: Wolves v Blackburn, 8pm, LIVE, Sky Sports Football.

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FOOTBALL | Daily Mail Sport | 73

By LEWIS STEELE

AFTER three months at Bournemouth, Andoni Iraola's job security was already under intense scrutiny.

The Basque boss, relatively unknown to English fans, had lost six and drawn three of his first nine league games. He did not win one until October 28 and was promptly thrashed 6-1 at Manchester City in the following game. Externally, the noise was deafening, especially after he had been installed in place of Gary O'Neil to some surprise in the summer.

But sticking by him was Bournemouth's only option and staffers were quick to dismiss reports of a potential sacking. They were right to do so, as Iraola turned his side's fortunes around. After no wins in the first nine, they won seven of the next nine, losing only one. They went from being a sinking ship to cruising.

But slow starts are a concerning theme for the new Liverpool manager.

In his first job at AEK Larnaca in Cyprus, he was sacked by mid-January. At Spanish second division club Mirandes, Iraola won one, drew five and lost four of his first ten fixtures. It was somewhat better at Rayo Vallecano, however given the club were expected to challenge for promotion, just five wins in the first 11 was nothing special.

With all due respect to Rayo, who were Conference League runners-up last season, and Bournemouth, who will play in this year's Europa League, there are certain things you can get away with at smaller clubs, but which will not fly at Anfield.

So consider his comments after the 3-2 defeat by Monaco in a pre-season friendly last Sunday. Iraola said his side played a good first 30 minutes but 'they don't have much more, in terms of the levels required to play like this'.

It came seven days after a 4-2 loss to Leeds in Chicago where the match followed a similar theme — Liverpool start well, go two goals up, look in fine fettle heading into the break, then capitulate and lose.

Now, there is a caveat. Aside from it being pre-season and with a good handful of players not fully fit after the World Cup summer, Liverpool's first-half XI in the last two friendlies will not be too dissimilar to the one that starts the opening game of the season away at Newcastle on August 23. Take your best players out for the second half, as Iraola has done, and it should be no surprise that it all falls apart.

Iraola's system is incredibly physically demanding and the buzzword of pre-season was intensity, with Dominik Szoboszlai insisting the 'intensity we have been missing is back'. Players have 'felt sick' after training given

We've got no legal left!

Tired: Kerkez, Van Dijk and Wirtz have endured a tough pre-season under Iraola

PA / ALAMY / REX

Iraola's brutal training has left Liverpool stars feeling sick and exhausted, but will it pay off this season?

the gruelling nature of the new regime.

One thing fans criticised Arne Slot for was a lack of such intensity, though worries that the squad were given too many days off was a myth. While they had clearly lost an edge and maybe belief or effort, they worked the same number of hours as they did when winning the league.

Regardless, things have changed now and players will need a period of becoming hardened to the new, all-action style. Some have spoken of having 'no legs left', but Iraola (right) hands out punishment for those who lose training drills — a sprint to the other end of the pitch and back.

Bournemouth ranked

first in the Premier League last season for direct attacks and third when it came to high turnovers, defined as any possession sequence that starts in open play and begins 40 metres or fewer from the opponent's goal.

Simon Brundish, a sports science expert, points out that the problem is players' ability to sprint repeatedly and be as explosive on sprint No.10 as they were on sprint No.1. He insists this is what vanishes fastest at the end of the season and can take between four to eight weeks to properly rebuild.

'Iraola's actual system is brutal on a specific quality — running just under a full sprint, done together, repeatedly, as a unit,' says Brundish. 'Bournemouth did 4.1km of that per game,

Liverpool did 1.4km (last season's averages). Total sprint numbers were basically the same between the two teams. It's not speed they're short on, it's making it repeatable.'

Players will also need time to adapt tactically to the differences between Slot and Iraola.

When speaking to Daily Mail Sport last year, Bournemouth forward Justin Kluivert said: 'It took everyone a while to understand. He had a rough start with a lot of losses, but the club believed in him, we believed in him, and that is paying off now. He has improved my game significantly... he played me in a different role so I thank Andoni for that... he had a good vision!'

Another former Cherry, Antoine Semenyo, said on the In The Mixer podcast: 'I didn't see it at the start. When he came in, he had his way of playing and it was very new to us, the way he structured the weeks.'

'We didn't really have any days off, so it's very hard for a team to go from having Wednesday and Sunday off to having no days off. It was very different at the start. The results weren't going our way and the fans were saying he needs to be sacked. Everyone slowly got used to the system and it just went up from there.'

Iraola, for the record, has shot down Semenyo's suggestion that the group have no time off — though this pre-season at Liverpool has been particularly demanding. After landing back from their US tour on Monday, the Reds were given Tuesday off and were then back on Wednesday.

Iraola is not making any early excuses, but it is worth keeping an eye on whether Liverpool come out of the blocks flying, as they have done in previous seasons.

In Jurgen Klopp's last campaign, the Reds won five and drew one of their first six league games. The following year, Slot secured 11 wins in the first 13 games and it took until the start of April for him to lose for the second time. Last term, they won the first five games and looked primed to retain their Premier League title, but then won only 12 of the remaining 33.

Iraola knows this league is a marathon not a sprint, but is also realistic that he must pick up some wins early in the campaign when his team are not at full capacity, physically or tactically.

There is a funny quirk that every manager Iraola will face until mid-October is also new to their job. His first six league fixtures are against Matthias Jaiszle, Oliver Glasner, O'Neil, Alvaro Arbeloa, Marco Rose and Enzo Maresca.

So Liverpool may look slightly off the pace now but they are certainly not the only ones, and will hope to be boosted by sharp starts from Alexander Isak and Florian Wirtz in their second seasons at the club.

As Iraola said this week: 'I would like to say on the first day, we are going to be perfect, everyone will be in place, but probably it is not going to be like this. We will have to do this as quickly as possible.'

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74 Daily Mail Sport FOOTBALL

Rabbie-rouser: Fernandez leads a chant about the Falklands at the World Cup before (right) being sent off in the final GETTY IMAGES

The face of the ugly game

If Maresca splashes City's cash on thuggish villain Fernandez, he will be jeopardising the reputation Pep worked so hard to build

IT is not a surprise Manchester City appear to be pursuing Chelsea's Enzo Fernandez, a player who, in the last couple of years, has come to symbolise much that is ugly about the beautiful game.

City's new manager, Enzo Maresca, has form for indulging and rewarding the graceless and base antics of the Argentina midfielder that goes back to his time when he was in charge at Stamford Bridge.

Two years ago, Maresca was forced to defend his decision to select Fernandez as Chelsea captain in their opening game of the 2024-25 season, against City, just a month after Fernandez posted a video of him and other Argentina players mocking the racial heritage of the France team. Chelsea team-mate Wesley Fofana branded the video, uploaded by Fernandez after

Chief Sports Writer

Argentina's win over Colombia in that summer's Copa America final, as 'uninhibited racism'.

Fernandez apologised. And in the absence of Reece James, Maresca made him skipper.

What Fernandez did was brainless as well as offensive. This is a player, don't forget, who was suspended by his own club after he flirted publicly with Real Madrid last season. This is a player who helped to get Liam Rosenior the sack at Chelsea when his performances dipped noticeably. This is a man who is

up there with the worst in the league in his attempts to pressure referees with his antics.

This is a player who was sent off in last month's World Cup final against Spain and whose thuggish, unpunished behaviour in the semi-final against England prompted widespread disgust.

In those circumstances, and given how much he would cost, it was predictable Madrid did not want to go anywhere near Fernandez. It was less predictable they would take the unusual step of stating publicly they were not interested in buying him.

'The club wishes to state,' the Madrid communique at the beginning of last month said, 'that it has not made any efforts, directly or indirectly, aimed at signing the aforementioned player and has no intention of pursuing such an operation.'

But now, a couple of months into the job, Maresca is already risking the reputation City built in the Pep Guardiola years for being a side that was widely

admired for the quality, style and attitude with which it went about dominating the Premier League over the past decade.

Chelsea have set a deadline of 5pm today for City to make a bid for Fernandez, 25, and meet their £120million asking price, but it is possible the story will bleed further towards the transfer deadline of September 1.

City under Guardiola were the team of gifted stars such as Kevin De Bruyne and Bernardo Silva. They were the team of Rodri and Ilkay Gundogan, Jack Grealish and Erling Haaland. They were a team that put a smile on the face of any neutral that watched them.

The purchase of Fernandez, if it happens, will change that. Fernandez is a fine player but his quality comes at a high cost in terms of the image of the team he plays for. The wisest managers buy character as well as quality.

The truth is if City buy Fernandez, it will represent not just a downgrade on Rodri, but a reversal of much the club stood

for under Guardiola. It will represent an embrace of the ugly side of the game. It will be a transfer that stands for cynicism. It will be a move that says City are swapping beauty for the game's dark arts.

The truth is also that Chelsea overpaid for Fernandez when they agreed to give Benfica £107m in the aftermath of the 2022 World Cup. He has not been as big a failure as some of the signings made by Chelsea owners BlueCo, but he has mixed outstanding performances with periods of near anonymity.

Fernandez is supposed to be one of the leaders of the team, but there were spells last season when he looked nothing like a leader. Leaders don't flirt with other teams. Leaders don't get suspended by their own club. Leaders don't allow mediocrity to flourish all around them.

Chelsea finished 10th in the Premier League last season, 33 points adrift of champions Arsenal, and Fernandez was part

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FOOTBALL

Daily Mail

Sport

75

It's all eyes on Enzo after £50m sale of Reijnders

By JACK GAUGHAN and SIMON JONES

MANCHESTER CITY sold Tijjani Reijnders to Saudi Arabian side Al Qadsiah for more than £50million last night — bringing their interest in Enzo Fernandez into focus before Chelsea's 5pm deadline. Fernandez is looking to secure a move to the Etihad Stadium this summer, which would see him link back up with former Blues manager Enzo Maresca.

Chelsea want £120m for the Argentina international, 25, and imposed a cut-off time for a bid to be made in order to draw a line under what threatens to become a saga. City are expected to test the severity of those demands after freeing up a spot in their midfield with the impending departure of Reijnders. Reijnders is leaving City after just a year at the club, signed from AC Milan for £46.5m last summer. He originally impressed, but struggled with the Premier League's physicality and starts under Pep Guardiola came hard to come by.

The 28-year-old Dutchman agreed to join the Saudi Arabian club — who are coached by Brendan Rodgers — having missed a training session with City yesterday. It is understood Nottingham Forest were also interested in signing him.

City's interest in Fernandez is proving divisive among supporters given his slew of controversies. But Maresca has insisted the team requires more experience and Fernandez — a World Cup winner in Qatar four years ago — fits the bill. City and Barcelona, meanwhile, continue to discuss a fee for midfielder Rodri.

City have dismissed the La Liga champions' latest offer of around £55m as they hold out for closer to £68m for the Spain captain.

City forward Jeremy Doku has signed a new contract at the Etihad that will keep him at the club until 2051, with an option for a further year. The Belgium international said: 'This club means so much to me — I have developed as both a player and a person. I feel settled here and I know I am improving every day because of the work the staff here do.'

Brazilian winger Savinho still hopes to secure a switch to Tottenham before the transfer deadline on September 1. Ipswich are interested in signing City centre back Juma Bah. The Sierra Leone international, 20, spent last season on loan at Nice.

of that surrender. If Chelsea sell him to City and somehow manage to recoup the money they paid for him four years ago, it should be cause for a huge celebration on the King's Road.

There are early signs, in fact, that Chelsea, under their own new manager, Xabi Alonso, are pursuing a more coherent transfer policy and will achieve a better balance in their squad.

If Fernandez leaves, it will be another step in the right direction for them. For City, it would be the opposite.

Maresca already has the most difficult job in English football in attempting to replace Guardiola. If he signs Fernandez, that job will get a whole lot harder.

SAUDIS EYE SARR AS TRIO NEAR SPURS EXIT DOOR

■ TOTTENHAM midfielder Pape Matar Sarr is emerging as a target for Al Ahli in the Saudi Pro League. The 23-year-old will be allowed to leave and has also been the subject of interest from BRENTFORD and ASTON VILLA, as well as other European sides. Juventus have revived talks for Spurs keeper

WINDOW WATCH By SIMON JONES

Guglielmo Vicario, while defender Cristian Romero will have his medical with Atletico Madrid tomorrow. Djed Spence will join Inter Milan. Spurs remain in talks for MANCHESTER CITY winger Savinho and Cody Gakpo of LIVERPOOL. City's Omar Marmoush is also on their list.

■ LEEDS are closing on an £8.2m deal for Borussia Monchengladbach centre back Nico Elvedi. The Switzerland international, 29, can also play at right back.

■ NAPOLI have agreed a deal with CHELSEA to sign defender Benoit Badiashile on an initial loan, with an option to buy for around £23m. Celtic are closing in on a loan for Chelsea full back Landon Emenalo.

■ MANCHESTER UNITED winger Ethan Williams has joined PETERBOROUGH for an undisclosed fee.

■ NOTTINGHAM FOREST are signing FULHAM goalkeeper Steven Benda on a free.

■ HULL CITY have formalised their interest in EVERTON midfielder Tim Iroegbunam with an offer in excess of £15million.

■ LEEDS forward Joe Geihardt has completed a Hull medical ahead of a £4.5million move.

■ DERBY COUNTY are signing Alex Movott from WEST BROM.

■ BRAZILIANS PALMEIRAS have signed Fabio So from BURNLEY.

■ Free agent Wilfried Zahai is training at former club CRYSTAL PALACE as he hunts a new club.

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Draper: Injuries have broken my spirit

TENNIS: PAGE 71

I NEED MORE PLAYERS

Carrick plea to United chiefs as their rivals splash the cash

NATHAN SALT

in Dublin

MICHAEL CARRICK last night urged his bosses at Manchester United to deliver more signings to help the club compete at the top of the Premier League.

Andrey Santos, Youri Tielemans and Karl Dariow are the only players to have arrived at Old Trafford so far this summer for a combined £85million, whereas United's rivals have picked up £100m-plus players such as Elliot Anderson and Morgan Rogers.

United sit outside the league's top ten spenders this summer — promoted sides Coventry and Ipswich have spent more — and Carrick insists he needs more reinforcements to challenge at the top.

'It can't be for the sake of it but of course we want to improve, we need to improve,' Carrick said. 'The situation is what it is as well, whether that's finances or whatever.'

'For now, we've got to make the most of it, but we have got to keep pushing, and push everything in every boundary so we are able to win again.'

Director of football Jason Wilcox travelled out with the team for their training camp in Ireland and is under pressure to deliver a left back and a midfielder before the September 1 deadline.

'We're pretty clear in the message that we need to keep pushing and there's certain things we want to try and do, but it needs to be right as well,' Carrick added.

LEVEL-HEADED CARRICK CAN'T HIDE HIS DESPERATION: PAGE 72

Flying the flag: Amy Hunt takes European 200m gold, having already won the 100m GETTY

Arsenal in talks for star striker Osimhen

By SIMON JONES

ARSENAL have discussed signing Victor Osimhen during talks with Galatasaray over the potential sales of Gabriel Martinelli and Ethan Nwaneri.

Galatasaray made a £38.5million verbal offer for Martinelli, but the 25-year-old Brazilian is reluctant to leave London. Nwaneri, 19, meanwhile, is assessing his options and, as it stands, talks for Nigeria striker Osimhen have not progressed. Martinelli has also had tentative interest from Paris Saint-Germain in recent weeks, but the French side have now turned their attention to Ajax's Mika Godts, 21.

England Under 21 international Nwaneri was frustrated with a lack of game time last season, but has interest from AC Milan, Fulham, RB Leipzig and Borussia Dortmund, among others.

Arsenal are also in talks with West Ham over the £3m sale of winger Reiss Nelson, and Napoli want striker Gabriel Jesus.

There is interest from Hamburg for Fabio Vieira, and fellow midfielder Martin Zubimendi is on the radar of Jose Mourinho's Real Madrid.

Enter your Unique Number now at Mailrewards.co.uk

QUICK CROSSWORD

ACROSS

1 Stubbornly resolute (7) 7 Sounding rough and harsh (6) 8 Hold-up (7) 9 Level (4) 10 Knock against (4) 12 Health (7) 14 Dual (7) 16 Molten rock from a volcano (4)

18 Heavy stick with a thick end (4) 20 Crime against the state (7) 21 Football player (6) 22 Replay (7) DOWN 1 Trapeze artist (7) 2 Stamp book (5) 3 Region (4) 4 Gland in the neck (7)

THURSDAY'S SOLUTION (NO 10,492) - ACROSS: 1 Forgiveness, 7 Beam, 8 Teacher, 9 Axe, 10 Towel, 11 Beckon, 13 Joseph, 16 Idled, 18 New, 19 Iceberg, 20 Talk, 21 Get together. DOWN: 1 Fleece, 2 Remark, 3 Intern, 4 Exact, 5 Enhance, 6 Scratch, 11 Beijing, 12 Collect, 13 Jungle, 14 Sketch, 15 Pillar, 17 Due to.

10,493

5 Motherly (8) 6 Evaluate (6) 11 Large white mushroom (8) 12 Butter up (7) 13 Very loyal and committed (7) 15 Strike or hit hard (6) 17 Thing of value (5) 19 Wheel of a boat (4)

SOLUTION TOMORROW

The Mail to: John Anglin, 416, 14 Cherry Street, London E1 8JH

When you have trouble! with this newspaper please recycle it Tel: 0044-333330 100 0008 © Associated Newspaper Ltd, 2026 No. 40,311

Enter the Unique Number to Spin our Golden Wheel and collect PRIZE DRAW TICKETS. If you are in Northern Ireland or your Unique Number is missing, sign into your Daily Mail Rewards account and click on the 'Enter Unique Number' button and then the 'Missing number/No customer' link and follow the instructions.

Visit MailRewards.co.uk to collect PRIZE DRAW TICKETS

---

IMAGINE CRUISING®

LIMITED TIME

OFFER

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ISLAND

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CRUISE • HOTEL STAY • FLIGHTS

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18 - 20 Nights | Nov & Dec 2026

Your Holiday Includes

14 night all-inclusive cruise on board Azamara Journey®

Includes alcoholic and non- alcoholic beverages, house spirits, wine and international beers

Pre-paid gratuities and AzAmazing Evenings® event

Concierge services for personal guidance and reservations

INTERIOR*

£3,199.00

VERANDA*

£4,199.00

OCEANVIEW*

£3,499.00

VERANDA PLUS*

£5,999.00

HOLIDAY CODE: AME8278

Prices, duration, and itinerary shown are based on 11 November 2026 departure. Prices shown include discount and savings based on two passengers sharing, booking directly with Imagine Cruising.

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For full terms and conditions please visit www.imaginecruising.co.uk. Imagine Cruising are fully ABTA and ATOL blended. Prices are correct at the time of print and are subject to change. Prices are per person based on two adults sharing a cruise cabin and include flights from London (regional flights available at a supplement). Holiday duration includes overnight flights when applicable and is subject to change.

---

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CRUISE • HOTEL STAY • FLIGHTS

INCLUDES ONE-NIGHT SAN FRANCISCO HOTEL STAY

OFFER EXTENDED - ENDS 28.08.26

HAWAIIAN ISLANDS DISCOVERY WITH PRINCESS CRUISES FROM SAN FRANCISCO

Interior from*

£1,699pp

18 Nights | Jan - Mar 2027

Your Holiday Includes

16 night full-board cruise on board Ruby Princess®

Visiting*: San Francisco, Hilo, Honolulu, Kahului, Kauai, Ensenada, San Francisco

Enhance your experience on board Ruby Princess® with Princess Plus® from £50pp per day including: Wi-Fi, Plus Beverage Package, four casual dining meals per guest, OceanNow® delivery, room service

One-night four-star stay in San Francisco at the Hotel Zoe Fisherman's Wharf

All flights (London departure - regional flights available)

Prefer to begin your journey in Los Angeles? Sail onboard Emerald Princess® from £1,499pp

PRINCESS

HOLIDAY CODE: AME8374

INTERIOR*

£1,699pp

BALCONY*

£2,399pp

OCEANVIEW*

£1,999pp

MINI-SUITE*

£3,299pp

Prices, ship and itinerary shown are based on 15 March 2027 departure. Balcony and Mini-Suite prices are based on 26 January 2027 departure. *Prices shown include discount and savings based on two passengers sharing an Interior cabin, departing 11 February 2027, booking directly with Imagine Cruising.

SALE

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PER COUPLE*

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Symphony

FULL-BOARD CRUISE • RAIL

INCLUDES TWO-NIGHT HOTEL STAY IN TOKYO

BOOK AN OCEANVIEW OR ABOVE & RECEIVE MOUNT FUJI TOUR & BULLET TRAIN JOURNEY

SPRINGTIME IN JAPAN: TOKYO ESCAPE & PRINCESS CRUISES ASIA VOYAGE

Interior from**

£2,699pp

13 - 16 Nights | Mar & Apr 2027

Your Holiday Includes

11 night full-board cruise on board Sapphire Princess®

Escorted tours** of Mount Fuji including reserved seat on the Bullet Train, views over Oishi Park and Owakudani Valley

Two-night four-star hotel stay in Tokyo at the Grand Nikko Tokyo Daiba

All flights (London departure - regional flights available) and transfers

Enhance your experience on board Sapphire Princess® with Princess Plus® from £50pp per day

MedallionNet® Max Wi-Fi, crew appreciation, Plus Beverage Package, four casual dining meals per guest, OceanNow® delivery, room service delivery

PRINCESS

HOLIDAY CODE: ASAB589

INTERIOR**

£2,699pp

BALCONY**

£3,699pp

OCEANVIEW**

£3,199pp

MINI-SUITE**

£4,499pp

+Prices shown include discount and savings based on two passengers sharing, departing 3 March 2027, booking directly with Imagine Cruising. Only available when booking an Oceanview cabin or above. *Prices, ship, duration and itinerary shown are based on 3 March 2027 departure.

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For full terms and conditions please visit www.imaginecruising.co.uk. Imagine Cruising are fully ABTA and ATOL bonded. Prices are correct at the time of print and are subject to change. Prices are per person based on two adults sharing a cruise cabin or suite and include flights from London (regional flights available at a supplement). Holiday duration includes overnight flights when applicable and is subject to change.

---

COMPLIMENTARY THREE-NIGHT

BARBADOS HOTEL STAY

INCLUDES PREMIUM DRINKS

WORLD-CLASS DINING & WI-FI

ULTRA-LUXURY ALL-INCLUSIVE SEABOURN

CARIBBEAN VOYAGE & BARBADOS ESCAPE

Veranda Suite (V1) from*

£3,899pp

11 Nights | Nov 2026 - Mar 2027

Your Holiday Includes

Seven-night all-inclusive ultra-luxury cruise on board Seabourn Ovation

Complimentary premium spirits and fine wines

Complimentary caviar offered throughout your voyage

Complimentary Wi-Fi packages with unlimited minutes

Complimentary world-class dining and culinary experiences

Complimentary three-night four-star hotel stay in Barbados at the Hilton Barbados Resort with breakfast

SEABOURN

HOLIDAY CODE: AME8376

VERANDA SUITE (V1)*

£3,899pp

VERANDA SUITE (V3)*

£4,199pp

VERANDA SUITE (V2)*

£3,999pp

PENTHOUSE SUITE*

£5,999pp

Holiday duration includes overnight flights when applicable and is subject to change. *Prices and itinerary shown are based on 9 December 2026 departure. Veranda Suite (V2) and Veranda Suite (V3) prices are based on 25 November 2026 departure.

INCLUDES A TEN-NIGHT

ESCORTED TOUR

INCLUDES A TWO-NIGHT

ISTANBUL HOTEL STAY

MYSTIC MOSAIC: GRAND TOUR OF ANCIENT TÜRKİYE

WITH LUXURY CUNARD MEDITERRANEAN VOYAGE

Inside from**

£2,999pp

18 Nights | September 2027

Your Holiday Includes

Seven-night full-board cruise on board Queen Elizabeth

Escorted tours of İstanbul city, Gallipoli Memorial, Trojan Horse photo stop, Ancient city of Pergamon, Troy ancient city, Ephesus, Hierapolis, Cotton Castle, Thermal Baths, Amphitheatre, Mevlana Museum, Sultan Han Caravanserai, Cappadocia and more

Four-star hotel stays in Barcelona, İstanbul, Çanakkale, Kuşadası, Pamukkale and Konya with breakfast+

Five-star hotel stay in Cappadocia with breakfast

CUNARD

HOLIDAY CODE: EUR2364

INSIDE**

£2,999pp

BALCONY**

£3,799pp

OCEANVIEW**

£3,399pp

GRILL SUITE**

£5,399pp

Images are solely illustrative of the destination, and do not necessarily feature activities included in your cruise or recommended by Imagine Cruising. **Prices, duration and itinerary shown are based on 29 September 2027 departure. +Konya and Çanakkale hotels also include dinner.

IMAGINE CRUISING®

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---

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RHINE AND DANUBE EUROPEAN GEMS

Window from*

£1,899pp

14 Nights | Sep - Dec 2026

Your Holiday Includes

14 night full-board river cruise on board Travelmarvel Vega*

Services of a Cruise Director, entertainment and activities coordinators, and local guides

Included excursions: Budapest walking tour, Vienna walking tour, Melk Abbey tour, Nuremberg city tour, Bamberg city tour, Cologne's World Heritage listed Augustusburg Castle, Amsterdam waterways glass-top boat discovery and a festive night of Bavarian cuisine, music and folk dancing on board your river ship

Other optional tours available

travelmarvel

HOLIDAY CODE: RVR7244

WINDOW*

£1,899pp

OWNER'S SUITE*

£4,399pp

FRENCH

BALCONY*

£2,699pp

*Prices, ship and itinerary shown are based on 26 October 2026 departure. ^Prices shown include discount and savings based on two passengers sharing, booking directly with Imagine Cruising.

EXCLUSIVE PROMOTION

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ENJOY EXPERTLY GUIDED TOURS INCLUDED THROUGHOUT

DRINKS WITH MEALS, GRATUITIES, AND WI-FI INCLUDED ON BOARD

TREASURES OF CAMBODIA & VIETNAM: IMMERSIVE MEKONG RIVER CRUISE

Deluxe Twin Balcony Suite from^^

£2,499pp

14 Nights | Sep 2026 - Feb 2027

Your Holiday Includes

Seven-night full-board river cruise on board RV Lotus

Includes drinks with all meals, gratuities and Wi-Fi on your cruise

Escorted Tours of Siem Reap, Phnom Penh, Mekong Delta, Mekong River, Cambodian Villages & Ho Chi Minh City

Two-night five-star hotel stay in Ho Chi Minh City at the Le Méridien Saigon with breakfast

Three-night five-star hotel stay in Siem Reap at the Shinta Mani Angkor with breakfast

travelmarvel

HOLIDAY CODE: ASA8599

DELUXE TWIN

BALCONY SUITE**

£2,499pp

SADEC TWIN

BALCONY SUITE**

£3,199pp

**Prices shown include discount and savings based on two passengers sharing a Deluxe Twin Balcony Suite, booking directly with Imagine Cruising. ^^Prices and itinerary shown are based on 25 September 2026 departure.

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---

MailPuzzles

Page 37

TERMS & CONDITIONS, PAGE 58

SUDOKU

FILL in all the squares in the grid so that each row, column and each of the 3x3 squares contains all the digits from 1 to 9. SOLUTIONS ON MONDAY

3	6	7			8
			5	3
2							6	1
6	7	1		5
			8	1			5
			2	9	7
	8							5
						7	4	9

						5
		1		8	7		6
2					9
			8				3	5
9	7		4			6
	2		3			7
				6	1	2	4
1	6	4				5
5

Difficulty rating ★★★★★

Difficulty rating ★★★☆☆

PRIZE SUDOKU

							5
					8	3
9	4			5			2
		1	3	4		6
		3		5	6	9	2
2							5
	3	9
4	8	5	7			6
			6	8

WIN £250

REVEAL the three shaded squares for your chance to win £250. HOW TO ENTER: Call 0901 292 5009 and leave today's three-number answer (reading left to right) and your details. Or text SUDOKU to 65700 with your answer and name. Texts and calls cost £1 plus standard network charges. One weekly winner chosen from all correct entries received between 00.01 Monday and 23.59 Friday. Answers change daily at 00.01. UK residents aged 18+, excl NI. See Terms & Conditions.

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE CROSSWORD

PLAY our accumulator game! For your chance to win a Cross ballpoint pen, solve the crossword to reveal the letter in the pink circle. If you have been playing since Monday, you should now have a five-letter word. To enter, call 0901 133 4423 and leave your answer and details. Or text 65700 with the word FIVE and your answer and name.

■ TEXTS and calls cost 50p plus standard network charges. One winner chosen from all correct entries received between 00.01 today and 23.59 this Sunday. UK residents aged 18+ excl NI. See Terms & Conditions.

WRITE YOUR LETTERS IN THESE SQUARES

WIN A LUXURY CROSS PEN

ACROSS

6 A sedimentary rock made from compressed clay, mud and silt (5) 7 Anne _ actress who plays Penelope in the 2026 film The Odyssey (8) 10 A small, handheld device used by those with breathing conditions (7) 11 TV sitcom featuring fictional chef Gary Preston (7) 12 Flat platforms for storing and transporting heavy goods (7) 13 A short biographical sketch in e.g. a newspaper or magazine (7) 14 Natural history TV series hosted by Chris Packham, axed by the BBC in 2026 (11) 19 A driving force or movement (7) 21 The _ jury, legal thriller novel by John Grisham published in 1996 (7) 23 Count _ novelty election candidate and guise of comedy writer Jonathan David Harvey (7) 25 A group of eight musicians (7) 26 Carey _ actress who plays Lindsay Crane-Martin in drama series Beef (8) 27 Tom _ singer-songwriter whose 2013 debut album was titled Long Way Down (5)

DOWN

1 The total money moving in and out of a business (4,4) 2 _ Mann, actress in films George Of The Jungle and this is 40, married to Judd Apatow (6) 3 Those in organised singing groups (10) 4 An upright stroke of a letter (4) 5 _ Minogue, singer and actress who played Emma Jackson in Home And Away (6) 6 Like clothing exposing much of the body (8) 8 Prestwick in Scotland is the site of an international one (7) 9 David _ late actor who played Harry Crawford in Boon (5) 13 Place in a wall for connecting equipment to the electricity supply (5,5) 15 Sport originally devised as a female alternative to basketball (7) 16 A large cannon with a short barrel for firing artillery shells (8) 17 Lance _ former West Indies spin bowler born in 1934 (5) 18 House _ ruling family in Game Of Thrones based at the castle of Highgarden (6) 20 Describing emotion that is restrained and not expressed (4-2) 22 Rhythm _ song by Janet Jackson released in 1989 (6) 24 The cutting side of an implement (4)

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

WORD WHEEL

YOU have ten minutes to find as many words as possible using the letters in the wheel. Each word must use the hub letter and at least three

others, and letters may be used only once. You can't use plurals, foreign words or proper nouns. Verbs ending in 's' permitted. Clue for today's nine-letter word: One thousand party hard in front of an American garden, a place where one should be respectful. RATING: 8 words, average; 12, good; 16, very good; 18 or more, excellent. SOLUTION TOMORROW

Test your general knowledge daily with our quiz in the Morning Mail newsletter. Scan the QR code to sign up now

NAME GAME

HIDDEN in the grid is the name of a singer. Answer the questions, then rearrange the letters corresponding to your answers to fill in the name. SOLUTION ON MONDAY

BOX 1: Which of the following has been Melanie C's (pictured) highest-charting album to date?

Reason (P)

Sweat (O)

Northern Star (W)

BOX 2: The word 'yuppie' comes from an acronym for a young urban what? Politician (1)

Proletarian (E)

Professional (R)

BOX 3: The late Roy Hattersley was an MP for which of the following political parties?

Conservative (A)

Labour (Y)

Liberal Democrat (K)

BOX 4: Which of these authors wrote the 2002 novel I Don't Know How She Does It?

Marian Keyes (I)

Jill Mansell (G)

Allison Pearson (L)

BOX 5: Who is the oldest player to have scored a goal in a men's FIFA World Cup match?

Roger Mills of Cameroon (M)

Pele of Brazil (B)

Cristiano Ronaldo of Portugal (C)

BOX 6: Oudewater is a city

and municipality in which

of these European countries?

Netherlands (S)

Austria (E)

Denmark (V)

BOX 7: Which actress was born

Ilyena Lydia Mironoff in 1945?

Susan Sarandon (A)

Meryl Streep (F)

Helen Mirren (L)

BOX 8: Late actress Anne Schedeen played matriarch Kate Tanner in which U.S. TV sitcom?

Dinosaurs (J)

ALF (U)

Everybody Loves

Raymond (D)

Yesterday's solution:

LEO SAYER

(3L, 2A, 3E, 4S,

5G, 6Y, 7R, 8E)

Picture: PA

MAKING TRACKS

LAY tracks to enable the train to travel from village A to village B. The numbers indicate how many sections of rail go in each row and column. There are only straight rails and curved rails. The track cannot cross itself.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

B

---

Page 38

MailPuzzles

HONEYCOMB

ALL the solutions read clockwise around their numbers. The solution to clue number 1 starts from the given letter.

1. Allow
2. Withdraw
3. Light
4. Approached
5. Wears away
6. Amended
7. Banished
8. Restricts
9. Tests
10. Pilot
11. That is
12. Roofers

SOLUTION: PULLOUT BACK PAGE

KAKURO

FILL in the blank squares of the grid using only the numbers 1 to 9, without repeating any number in any line of blank squares. The lines must be filled in with numbers which add up to the total in the shaded box at the top or beginning of each line. A number in the bottom half of a shaded box gives a downwards total; in the top half, it's a horizontal total.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

MASTERQUIZ

1. What is the name of Sebastian Flyte's teddy bear in Evelyn Waugh's novel Bridleshead Revisited?
2. Who played Cleopatra in the 1964 comedy film Carry On Cleo?

3. Guitarist Robert Frigo has been the only constant member of which progressive rock group?

4. Jose Antonio Kast became the new president of which South American country in March?

5. What is the four-letter word for a horizontal shaft that runs from the surface to the mineral seam in a mine?
6. The Society Islands are located in which ocean?

SOLUTION: PULLOUT BACK PAGE

MINDBENDER

1. At an outdoor concert venue, there is a total of 134 people and chairs, collectively, if there are 490 legs in total at the venue, how many chairs are there?
2. What connects bag, garden and towel?

3. Which wedding term may have NO RECEIPT?

4. Which is the odd one out: Makemake, Hale-Bopp, Gonggong, Eris?

5. Rearrange the letter groups to make three musical genres: ALL ASS CEH SPI DAN UAL EGR RIT BLU.

SOLUTION: PULLOUT BACK PAGE

KILLER

SUDOKU

FILL in squares in the grid so each row, column and each 3x3 square contains all digits from 1 to 9. Each set of cells joined by dotted lines must add up to the number in the top-left corner. Numbers can't be repeated within each set of cells.

SOLUTION ON

MONDAY

NEED A CLUE? Call 0901 293 6238 or text KILLER to 65700 and receive four clues to today's puzzle. Cells and texts cost £1 plus your standard network charges. Today's clues available between 00.01 today and 23.30 only.

PITCHERWITS™

1a. Horse, honed in training that's squeezed in (10)

8a. Falling to power out the haulage line (7)

14a. Ript apart Pasteur's concoction (5,2)

18a. I keep 10, in my bizarre fashion, as a Florida pud (3,4,3)

3d. Personal drivers of virtual movements? (8)

5d. Those who lean on badly dented pans! (10)

6d. Take to Ben's plans, one for a carnivore's plate (1-4,5)

9d. Pin wiped clean away from the trachea (8)

PIT your wits against Pitcherwits – the exciting puzzle where some of the answers are in pictures! The solutions to the visual clues fit into the shaded spaces on the grid.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

DOWN

2 Prehistoric bit of that very man (3) 3 Picture Clue 4 Jet engine lion-speak? (4) 5 Picture Clue 6 Picture Clue 9 Picture Clue

10 Not able, above all, to be egg-shaped (4) 12 Amicable bit of rock? (4) 15 Dance at the end of a rod? (4) 17 There's kinetic energy in this resort! (3)

ACROSS

1 Picture Clue 7 Low singer, taking a boss for a ride (5) 8 Picture Clue 11 Minim, biennially appearing in clouds (5) 13 Dealt illegally at river mouth (5)

YESTERDAY'S SOLUTION — ACROSS: 1 Blasting off. 5 Wader. 7 Lithe. 9 Flounce. 11 Day. 12 Bit. 13 Intense. 16 Organ. 17 Limit. 18 Go cap in hand. DOWN: 1 Bowled along. 2 Torso. 3 Nolan. 4 Field-tested. 6 Defying. 8 Tie beam. 10 Use. 14 Ton-up. 15 Nylon.

MAILWORD

ACROSS

1 Maple genus 5 Implore 10 Commercial symbol 11 African country 12 Conclusive evidence 14 Convent 15 Skill 16 Behind schedule 18 Vehicle 19 Wild cat 22 Muhammad _ boxer 23 Owned by us 24 Gesture of assent 26 Ancient city 28 Bind 29 Technical criteria

30 Priest's vestment 31 Computer message 34 Asian peninsula 36 _ Ronstadt, singer 37 Right mind 38 Carrying heavy bags 39 Get beaten

DOWN

1 Andean mammal 2 Cattle enclosures 3 Bout of indulgence 4 Marsupial, informally 5 Dish holder 6 Defamation 7 Decline 8 Affirmative vote

9 Part of a week 13 Residential map 17 Marked 20 Canadian lake 21 Lavatories 25 Cheapen 27 Confidential speech 31 Unit of length 32 Mamma _ ABBA single 33 Also 35 Nocturnal predator

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

HIDATO

COMPLETE the grid so that all the numbers, 1 to 90, connect consecutively — horizontally, vertically or diagonally. Hint: you don't have to begin with 1 or 90. Working on the mid-numbers might give you a better start.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

---

Page 39

KENKEN

EACH row and column should contain 1 to 6 without repeats. Numbers in cages must combine to produce the target number shown at start of that cage using, in any order, the mathematical sign given. Single-box cages can be filled with the number given.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

	L	L	S
L			S
S			P
L			H
	S	Y	K

COURTROOM

NINE TO FIVE

FIT the scrambled letters of the given word into the grid to form six five-letter words across and down.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

WORLD'S SMALLEST, HARDEST CROSSWORD

ACROSS

1. U.S. military advisory body (abbr) (3)
2. Relating to wings (4)
3. Adriatic wind (4)
4. Alcoholic drink (3)

DOWN

1. An injection (Inf) (3)
2. Wooden shoe (4)
3. Indian attire (4)
4. Managed (3)

SOLUTION TOMORROW

1	2	3
4			5
6
	7

CROSS NUMBER

THERE MAY BE MORE THAN ONE SOLUTION

	5		12
		7	30
2			10
	9		30
23	24	18	17

Today's challenge time:

3 mins 3 secs

Your working time:

□ mins □ secs

FILL each square with a number, 1 to 9. Horizontal squares add up to totals on right. Vertical squares add up to totals on bottom. Diagonal squares through centre add up to totals in top and bottom right.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

CODEWORD

EACH number in our Codeword grid represents a different letter of the alphabet. Today 22 represents Q, so fill in Q every time the figure 22 appears. You have two letters in the control grid to start you off. Enter them in the appropriate squares in the main grid, then use your knowledge of words to work out which letters should go in the missing squares. SOLUTION TOMORROW

COMPLETE Codeword to reveal the word in the shaded boxes. HOW TO ENTER: Call 0901 293 6232 and leave your answer and your details or text 65700 with the word CODE, your answer and then your name. Texts and calls cost £1 plus standard network charges. One weekly winner chosen from all correct daily entries received between 00.01 Monday and 23.59 Saturday. Answers change daily at 00.01. UK residents aged 18+, excl NI. See Terms & Conditions.

NEED A CLUE? Text the word CODEWORD to 65700 to receive FOUR clues to today's puzzle or call 0901 293 6200. Texts and calls cost £1 plus your standard network charges. Today's clues available between 00.01 today and 23.30 only.

S	D	C	B	V	L	G	M	V
P	E	O	U	M	O	O	N	G
A	C	L	H	Z	Q	R	N	N
C	A	L	T	P	U	O	I	M
E	N	I	E	T	R	R	V	O
S	A	N	A	T	D	C	H	D
U	V	S	S	L	N	P	Q	U
I	E	M	A	X	Q	E	N	L
T	R	W	N	Z	W	V	H	E
A	A	G	J	C	Y	G	Q	H
H	L	H	O	U	S	T	O	N

WORD SEARCH

THE listed words can all be found in the grid – running forwards, backwards, up, down and diagonally – EXCEPT ONE. For a chance to win, discover which word is

Today's theme: Apollo programme

ALDRIN	KENNEDY
ARMSTRONG	MODULE
CANAVERAL	MOON
COLLINS	SATURN V
HOUSTON	SPACESUIT

HOW TO ENTER: Call 0901 293 6234 and leave your answer and details or text 65700 with the word WORD, your answer and your name. Texts and calls cost £1 plus standard network charges. One winner chosen from all correct daily entries received between 00.01 Monday and 23.59 Friday. Answers change daily at 00.01. UK residents aged 18+, excl NI. See Terms & Conditions. SOLUTION ON MONDAY

SUDOKU X

PUT the numbers 1-6 once in each row, each column, each diagonal (highlighted to form an X) and each horizontal 3x2 box (ruled). SOLUTION ON MONDAY

				4
		5
				5
	2
			1		6

QUICK QUIZ

1. In which American city is Graceland, the former home of Elvis Presley?
2. Which Victorian engineer designed Bristol's Clifton Suspension Bridge and Paddington Station?
3. Which musician had a UK No. 1 with a song from this year's Toy Story 5 soundtrack?
4. The wildebeest is native to which continent?
5. Here Comes The Sun appears on which album by The Beatles?

SOLUTION: PULLOUT BACK PAGE

GOGEN

AXIS BID DIME DISCOGRAPHY FORT FOXY GAWP JIVE KEY PAWN QUANGO SCOLD TOXIC WARDS

AB∠DE∠FGHIJKLMNOPQRSTJYWXY

INSERT letters to form listed words, moving between adjacent cells horizontally, vertically or diagonally in any direction. Insert all remaining letters of the alphabet (except 2) in the grid so all listed words are spelt out.

SOLUTION ON MONDAY

---

Page 40

MailPuzzles

BRIDGE MASTERCLASS | CRYPTIC CROSSWORD

North ▲ 10 9 5 3 ▼ 9 ▼ None ▲ KQ J 9 8 7 5 3 West ▲ K ▼ A K Q J 7 3 ▲ A 6 5 2 ▲ 10 4

South ▲ 8 7 2 ▼ 10 8 6 ▲ K Q J 10 9 8 ▲ 6

YOU are playing in 6♥ from the West seat after North has overcalled 4♣. North led the 4K, which you won, you then drew trumps in three rounds. North having one. Cashing two more rounds of trumps revealed the 4♣ discard from South, while North threw just clubs. You cashed the 4A and discovered that North had none.

YOU now know that North is guarding the spades and must have begun with a 4-5-6-8 shape. Cash your remaining trump, coming down to five cards, and look out for the discard on your left.

If North throws another club to keep four spades, you can cash the 4K and then play your club to leave North with just spades. If North throws a spade, you can overtake the 4K to cash the suit.

HEATHER DHONDY

FOR your choice to win, solve the crossword to reveal the word reading down the shaded boxes. HOW TO ENTER: Call 0901 293 6233 and leave today's answer and your details, or 1X3X 65700 with the word CRYPTIC, your answer and your name. Text/skills cost (1) plus standard network charges. Or enter by post by sending the completed crossword to Daily Mail Prize Crossword 17.944, PO Box 28, Coldwater, Essex CD2 8LF. Please include your name and address. One weekly winner chosen from all correct daily entries received between 00.31 Monday and 23.59 Friday. Postal entries must be date-stamped no later than the following day to qualify. Calls and texts must be received by 23.59; answers change at 00.01. UK residents aged 18+, excl NI. See Terms & Conditions.

ACROSS

1 Winter right away turning a little to get facts on person's history (7) 5 Isolated group of workers held back on holiday (3,3) 9 Sit near Dicky weeping (2,5) 10 Talk of private bitterness (7) 11 Freshwater fish indeed regularly seen (3) 12 Teen product curiously without any cover (11) 13 Elevated soft sound heard in short poem (5) 14 Chair once replaced device for wintry explorers? (3,6) 16 A French husband before full PE sadly typifying a disobliging sort? (9) 17 Arrange merchandise in shift, perhaps (5) 19 Noticed lush getting tipsy and no longer with a sense of reality? (2,3,6) 22 Noise among loud interns (3) 23 After moving, a Celt is flexible (7) 24 Giving a speech first off at a high point? (7) 26 Very thin family seen in southern U.S. city (8) 27 Well-mannered lady's partner given jellied food (7)

DOWN

1 This bar I suspect is lacking a description of our culture (7) 2 Pursuing things correctly, like an athlete abiding by the rules? (2,3,5,5) 3 Heat-retaining stove once more not fashionable (3) 4 A model upcoming teller of moral stories (5) 5 Rope Carol tangled having a physical element (9) 6 Some nothing exceptional shade of colour (5) 7 Type of car in lead we deliver freely around Hungary (5-5,5) 8 One selling goods rated poorly close to another (6) 12 Standard uniform held by American male, essentially (5) 14 With no half measures, clubs go on network at a very intense level of activity? (2,4,3) 15 Refusal by man to show swellings (5) 16 Brings together military squad on empty embarkments (6) 18 African country for one bordered by winding lanes (7) 20 Dined in Berkshire school, reportedly (5) 21 Detach post-rate given by Margaret (5) 25 Woman found in Italian nightclub (3)

NEED A CLUE? Text TIP to 65700 to receive FOUR answers to today's crossword, or call 0901 293 6236. Texts and calls cost (1) plus standard network charges. Today's clues available between 00.01 today and 23.30 only.

SOLUTIONS TO YESTERDAY'S PUZZLES

SUDOKU
4	7	8	6	9	2	3 1 5
3	9	6	5	1	8	7 2 4
5	2	1	7	4	3	9 6 8
7	6	4	9	2	1	6 5 3
2	1	3	8	6	5	4 9 7
9	6	5	3	7	4	2 8 1
6	4	7	1	5	9	8 3 2
1	2	2	4	8	6	5 7 9
8	5	9	2	3	7	1 4 6

WORD SEARCH
Missing: EVER
1	2	3	4	5	6	7
8	9	10	11	12	13	14
15	16	17	18	19	20	21
22	23	24	25	26	27	28
29	30	31	32	33	34	35
36	37	38	39	40	41	42
43	44	45	46	47	48	49
50	51	52	53	54	55	56
57	58	59	60	61	62	63

NINE TO FIVE
	M	S	A			24
G	A	U	N	T
R	I	D	G	E
S	M	A	R	T
	S	N	Y
MATAUDING

WORD WHEEL: abet, able, abut, bale, baleen, bane, bean, beat, beaten, beau, beaut, been, beet, belt, benn, bent, beta, betel, bleat, blue, blunt, bunt, butane, butane, enable, nebula, table, lunabe, tuba, tuba, tulae, tunable, unable, unbeaten, unbent, untenable.

PRIZE SUDOKU
2	4	9	1	5	8	9 7 3
5	6	5	7	4	3	2 9 1
7	3	1	9	2	6	5 4 8
9	5	4	3	7	2	1 8 6
2	1	6	8	9	5	7 2 4
8	7	3	6	1	4	3 5 9
6	9	5	4	3	7	8 1 2
4	8	7	2	6	1	9 3 5
1	2	3	5	8	9	4 6 7

KAKURO
1	2	3	4	5	6	7
8	9	10	11	12	13	14
15	16	17	18	19	20	21
22	23	24	25	26	27	28
29	30	31	32	33	34	35
36	37	38	39	40	41	42
43	44	45	46	47	48	49
50	51	52	53	54	55	56
57	58	59	60	61	62	63

CROSS NUMBER
1	2	3	4	5	6	7
8	9	10	11	12	13	14
15	16	17	18	19	20	21
22	23	24	25	26	27	28
29	30	31	32	33	34	35
36	37	38	39	40	41	42
43	44	45	46	47	48	49
50	51	52	53	54	55	56
57	58	59	60	61	62	63

PRIZE SUDOKU
9	7	3	2	6	1	8 5 4
9	8	5	4	9	7	2 1 3
1	2	4	5	8	3	9 7 6
9	3	2	6	1	5	4 9 7
7	6	9	6	3	4	5 2 1
4	5	1	7	2	9	3 6 8
5	4	8	1	7	2	6 3 9
2	9	7	5	4	6	1 8 0
3	1	6	9	5	8	7 4 2

MACKING TRACKS
1	2	3	4	5	6	7
8	9	10	11	12	13	14
15	16	17	18	19	20	21
22	23	24	25	26	27	28
29	30	31	32	33	34	35
36	37	38	39	40	41	42
43	44	45	46	47	48	49
50	51	52	53	54	55	56
57	58	59	60	61	62	63

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE CROSSWORD ACROSS: 1 They Are A-Changin', 8 Empties, 9 Curtain, 10 Doric, 11 Matt Dyson, 12 Rounder, 14 Badge, 15 Idiot, 17 Vietnam, 19 Cape Verde, 22 Ocean, 23 En route, 24 Origams, 25 Ralph

30-SECOND CHALLENGE

START on left with number given and follow instructions as you go across. In 30 seconds, beginners have to complete their own challenge; intermediates have to complete their own challenge and the beginner's; advanced players have to complete their own challenge and the intermediate's.

SOLUTION BELOW

www.30secondchallenges.com

YOUR ANSWERS

Beginner	85	+6	÷7	×6	+18	÷12	×40	1/2 OF IT	+2	÷9
Intermediate	54	-9	11/16 OF IT	×12	5/99 OF IT	TIMES ITSELF	4/5 OF IT	25% OF IT	-2	5/6 OF IT
Advanced	1000	7/40 OF IT	200% OF IT	-14	5/14 OF IT	LESS 30%	225% OF IT	66 2/3% OF IT	+17	3/11 OF IT

KENKEN
2	4	5	3	6	1
3	1	3	4	3	6
3	2	4	6	1	5
4	6	3	1	3	3
1	3	6	5	2	1
6	5	1	2	4	3

KELLER SUDOKU
8	3	5	4	9	1	6 2 7
9	2	4	7	5	8	1 3 9
9	1	7	5	8	2	8 5 4
7	4	1	9	2	3	5 6 6
2	9	6	5	6	4	7 1 3
5	8	3	1	7	8	9 4 2
3	8	8	2	1	5	4 7 9
4	5	9	6	3	7	2 9 1
1	7	2	8	4	8	3 6 5

RICHARDSON. DOWN: 1 The coast is clear. 2 Emperor. 3 Agincourt. 4 Epsom. 5 Acrid. 6 Grassed. 7 Non-intervention. 9 Coterie. 10 Diverse. 14 Bandster. 16 Imperil. 18 Maenads. 20 Vouch. 21 Enoch.

SUDOKU X
1	6	3	2	4	5
8	4	2	3	6	1
6	3	5	1	2	4
2	1	4	6	5	3
4	2	1	5	3	6
3	5	6	4	1	2

GOGEN
5	7	1	0	0
7	9	6	7	1
8	2	6	1	1
9	6	1	1	1
10	2	6	1	1
11	6	1	1	1
12	6	1	1	1
13	6	1	1	1
14	6	1	1	1
15	6	1	1	1
16	6	1	1	1
17	6	1	1	1

MALWORD
1	6	3	2	4	5
8	4	2	3	6	1
6	3	5	1	2	4
2	1	4	6	5	3
4	2	1	5	3	6
3	5	6	4	1	2

CRYPTIC CROSSWORD No. 17,941 ACROSS: 6 in a tight corner. 9 Shrike. 10 Ayia Napa, 11 Budgeted, 13 Orates. 15 Advise. 17 Cycles, 19 Quinoa. 20 Hardwood. 22 Smash hit. 24 Gnany. 26 Prison officers. DOWN: 1 Without a murmur. 2 Raki. 3 Divert. 4 Acrimony. 5 Bran. 7 Hoards. 8 Expressionless. 12 Gavin. 14 Aglow. 16 Scathing. 18 What-if. 21 Regain. 23 So-so. 25 Awed.

MAILWORD ACROSS: 1 Slip. 5 Clef. 9 Scene. 10 Like. 11 Horace. 12 Used. 13 Awe. 14 Llamas. 15 New. 17 Isis. 18 Arson. 20 Icyra. 24 Beam. 26 Ron. 27 Need-be. 29 Ego. 30 Lady. 31 Unseen. 33 Aide. 34 Stops. 35 Glad. 36 Espy. DOWN: 1 Screws. 2 Lea. 3 Inclined. 4 Peels. 5 Chumy. 6 Lisa. 7 Ekes. 8 Fed. 9 Sower. 11 Ha-ha. 15 Ailments. 19 Obeyed. 21 Creepy. 22 Rages. 23 Arson. 25 Abuse. 27 Nail. 28 Edda. 30 Lag. 32 Sop.

WORLD'S SMALLEST, HARDEST CROSSWORD — ACROSS: 1 Icky. 5 Aye. 6 Fun. 7 Flew. DOWN: 2 Cast. 3 Kyrie. 4 Hi. 6 Pt.

SOLUTIONS TO TODAY'S PUZZLES

QUICK QUIZ: 1 Memphis. 2 hambard Kingdom Brunel. 3 Taylor Swift. 4 Africa. 5 Abbey Road. MINDBENDER: 1 1/2 chairs. 2 They may all follow too. 3 Reception. 4 Haki-Bopp, a comet; the others are dwarf planets. 5 Bluegrass, dancehall, spiritual. MASTERQUIZ: 1 Aloysius. 2 Amanda Barrie. 3 King Crimson. 4 Chile. 5 Adif. 6 Pacific. HONEYCOMB: 1 Permit. 2 Revoke. 3 Kindle. 4 Heared. 5 Eros. 6 Edited. 7 Eiled. 8 Units. 9 Trial. 10 Airman. 11 Namely. 12 Tiers.

KUROSU O X O O X X X O O O X O X O X O O X O X O X O O O O X X O X O O O X X O X O O O X X O X O O O X 30-SECOND CHALLENGE: Beginner: 16. Intermediate: 65. Advanced: 39.

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